02x38 - K Is For Kibble

[bunniefuu]

-[theme music playing]
-[barking]

[engine revs]

♪ I'm seeing lots of spots ♪

♪ Plenty of polka dots ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ Can't catch a furry flurry ♪

♪ Running in a blurry hurry ♪

[barking]

♪ Get those puppies! ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Canines on the run ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Them doggone dogs are fun ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Without fail you'll wind up
Chasing your tail ♪

♪ What's the harm
In revelrous adventures ♪

-♪ On the funny farm? ♪
-[clucks]

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

[barks]

♪ Life's just a bed of roses ♪

♪ 1-0-1 ♪

♪ Fast friends with cold, wet noses ♪

-♪ 1-0-1 ♪
-♪ Through thick, thin, push and pull ♪

♪ It's 1-0-1 oh wonderful! ♪

♪ Just tons of fun ♪

♪ 101 Dalmatians! ♪

[classical music playing]

[ominous music playing]

[Spot] It looked bad for the kid.

He was accused of stealing kibble.

The prosecution had a solid case.

Only a miracle could save him.

Or a chicken.

[yawning]

It all started three days ago,

on a morning as bland
as a potato pancake.

But it soon turned sour
as a pickle in a pitcher of lemonade.

Nanny, it's been stolen!

My model train set is gone.
Somebody stole it!

Oh, maybe you just misplaced it.

Well, how could I misplace
an entire train?

They even took the track.

Do you know how hard it is
to replace G-gauge track?

[clanging]

[puppies yipping]

Come on, Rolly,
you don't wanna miss breakfast.

[sighs]
I'd rather sleep than eat.

[grunts]

Come on, Rolly, you can do it!

[all gasp]

Uh-huh!

[all gasp]

[crunch]

[gulps]

[sighs]

[dogs snarling]

We can't be out of kibble.

I just filled the Chow Tower two days ago!

Well, maybe it's just stuck.

[gasps]

[echoing]
Empty!


It's a recipe for disaster.

[Spot] The crime:
an entire silo full of kibble, vanished,

like a wallet
at a pickpocket's convention.

The problem: no clear explanation why.

The plan: investigate.

Leave it to the mayor
to make political hay out of the case.

A serious crime has been committed
against 101...

Hey, 102!

[clears throat]

Against more than 100 voters...
uh, citizens...

of this here barnyard.

[Mayor Pig] Lieutenant Pug.

Yes, sir!

I'm officially putting your Bark Brigade

in charge of guarding the Chow Tower.

You will stand watch all night
if necessary

to protect this community's
essential supply of kibble.

Consider it done, sir!

[Spot] Night fell like a lump of lead.

The lieutenant went into his usual
song and dance.

Look sharp, cadets!

Obviously, marauding cats...

are raiding the Chow Tower
and stealing precious kibble.

Somebody's added a new wing
to Paranoia Palace.

Our mission is to attack
and crush their army

with overwhelming force!

Any questions?

Good! Since there are no questions,

to your posts!

[snoring]

[Spot] The hours dragged
like a shopping cart through wet cement.

[sighs]

Huh?

Then I heard it...

[gasps]

... something in the darkness, moving.

[groans]
Who's out there?

[teeth chattering]

Then the ground got nervous.

[Pug screams]

Cat attack!

And they got tanks!

Lucky, roll out the cannon!

Cadet Cadpig, man the machine g*n.

Cadet Spot!

Don't just stand there!

[squawking]

[Pug] Fire cannon!

Fire machine g*n!

[grunting]

They're in retreat!

[Pug laughs]

Not a tank in sight.

[screams]

Lieutenant Pug,
we can't find Rolly anywhere.

Then they've got him.

Oh, I hate to think
how those cats will make him suffer!

[Pug] First, they'll toy with him.

Then...

Wait! There he is!

[gasps]

Oh! Brought down by friendly fire.

Rolly!

Are you all right?

[groans]
I guess so.

Charging the enemy
in the midst of an a*tillery barrage

takes guts!

You'll get a medal for this.

[Spot] Something here was fishier
than a bucket of red herrings,

but I couldn't put my finger on it, yet.

[bell ringing]

Dawn arrived, as it always did, early.

Spirits were high.

Word had spread
of the lieutenant's victory.

And the kid
was the toast of the trough...

[sighs]

[Spot] ... for about six seconds.

[all gasping]

Despite the stakeout,

the Chow Tower was as empty
as a gangster's promise.

[Nanny screams]

-What?
-Huh?

Oh, not again!

[Roger] If this pilferage doesn't stop,
we won't be able to keep 101 dogs.

[all] What?

[Spot] It was time to call in the big dog.

This was a job for Pullet Marlowe,
Private Chick.

[grunts]

[bluesy jazz band plays]

I began my investigation
with a visit to a known felon,

a convicted egg thief named
after a lot of boiled dough.

[Spot] Morning, Dumpling.

Uh, you are blocking my sunbeam, Spot.

[Spot] Call me Marlowe.

I see you are playing Private Cluck again.

I see you are putting on weight.

Flattery will get you nowhere.

Funny, you putting on the pounds

with so much kibble mysteriously missing.

You've got nothing on me.
I'm as clean as new-fallen snow.

In a pig's eye.

You got a record a mile long, sweetheart.

That egg-nappin' was never proven!

Never proven? You confessed to the crime.

[Dumpling]
So? You got me on a technicality.

Move on, Marlowe!

My daughter's as clean as new-fallen snow.

[Spot] I was about to point out
that we'd already used that gag,

when somebody dumped
a truckload of stars on my head.

[thwacks]

[crash, squawks]

I woke up a few yards later

and decided to continue my investigation

where the air didn't smell
like raw bacon.

The suspect: Scorch.

Look up "thief" in the dictionary
and you'll find his picture.

He's also listed
under "burglar," "crook," and "earwax,"

but I think the last one was a typo.

-Good crackers?
-Huh?

The name's Marlowe.

Enjoying your meal?

[Scorch snickers]

No substitute for kibble, is it?

Eh, uh, I don't know.

Oh, you don't, do you?

[screams]

[incoming whistle]

[sniffs]

Oh, I do adore the scent
of deadly nightshade.

[grunts]

That was a mistake.

[Spot squawking]

[Cruella snarling]

[Spot squawking]

-[screams]
-No!

[splats]

Whoa!

[splashes]

[spits, groans]

[screams]

Oh, oh!

[groaning]

[squawking]

[Cruella] Come back here!

-[screams]
-[Spot] Yeow!

[Spot grunts]

[scream]

Three words for you, chicken:

deep fat fryer!

[quirky music playing]

[Spot]
One last suspect filled out my list,

a character so low,

he needed elevator shoes
to reach the gutter.

Did you say elevator shoes?

[Spot] No, that was a voice-over.

And I'm not here to shop, Swamp Rat.

Unless you're discounting kibble
this week.

Don't deal in perishables.

[Swamp Rat] You're fishing for clues
and I'm plumb out.

Look at me: I'm laid up, incapacitated,

helpless as a baby on a bobsled.

[groaning]

Dang thing itches like the dickens, too.

Steven!

Kindly show this here flatfoot out.

[snarls]

[Spot] Help!

[spits]

[grunting]

You got off easy.

[groaning]

The next time you come nosin' around...
[snaps fingers]

[whimpering]

[Spot] What did I know so far?

Besides what the inside
of Steven's yapper looks like.

What facts are missing?

What else do I need to know?

I felt like a Slinky on an escalator.

I was getting nowhere, fast.

But I still had work to do.

I decided to try the team approach.

This is the time to think broadly
and carefully

about the facts, kids.

Here's what we know so far.

We have three main suspects: Dumpling!

Known food thief.

Scorch! Light-fingered by nature.

And Swamp Rat!

Enough said.

What is your assessment of the facts?

What makes sense?

And what still seems puzzling?

Dumpling's small-time.

A major kibble heist is inconsistent

with her psychological profile.

Yeah, and Scorch can have anything
he wants to eat.

Why would he steal kibble?

And the Swamp Rat's laid up...

[burps]

...with a broken leg.

My thoughts exactly.

But there is one more suspect.

[Rolly] Who?

-You!
-[gasps]

Uh... Huh?

The morning after the first heist,

only you weren't hungry.

[yawns]

I'd rather sleep than eat.

[groans]

[Spot] The night of the stakeout,

you were mysteriously missing
during the battle.

Lieutenant Pug,
we can't find Rolly anywhere.

When we fired into the dark,
the only thing we hit...

was you!

But... I didn't steal the kibble, I swear!

If Rolly says he didn't do it,
then that's good enough for me.

[Spot] There's only one other explanation.

But I'll need your help to test my theory.

[snoring]

[Spot] That night I kept myself awake
by reading the grocery ads.

Around midnight, my hunch bore fruit.

[yawns]

[screams]

The kid was sleepwalking.

[Spot] A little help here, guys.

Uh, Lucky?

Wake up! It's Rolly.

Huh?

[grunts]

Come on!

Hmm. He's headed for the garden.

Well, at least he isn't headed
for the Chow Tower.

[quirky music playing]

[chomping]

As I suspected,

Rolly's not only been sleepwalking,

he's been sleep eating.

[scoffs]
So, he is the kibble culprit!

[suspenseful music playing]

[Pug] A traitor!

Oh, this is a very dark day
for the Bark Brigade!

[spits]
Huh?

We have to wake him up
before he gets to the Chow Tower!

Yeah. If he eats another tower of food,

Roger will kick us all out for good!

[Pug] Everyone, freeze!

I'm in charge of this operation here.

[confused shouting]

[Lucky] Where's Rolly?

[Rolly burps]

[Spot] We had to stop the kid
before he turned the Chow Tower

into his own private smorgasbord.

Hey, listen!

I've heard that rumble before.

Yeah, from Rolly's stomach on pizza night!

I'm afraid we're too late.

Oh, Rolly!

Cadets, check the tower.

[bell dinging]

[bird squawks]

[all] Oh!

[Spot] The lieutenant put the kid
through the wringer

and hung him out to dry.

I order you, Rolly,
banished from the barnyard!

-[gavel raps]
-[gasp]

[Spot] They sent the kid packing
the next morning.

It looked like I could stamp this one
"case closed."

But a few loose ends were bugging me.

Like... little buggy things.

What was that rumble we kept hearing?

The Chow Tower had guards
posted continually

after the first raid.

but still the kibble disappeared.

And did anyone actually see the kid
steal the kibble?

No! The case against him
is totally circumstantial.

It was my fault they nailed the kid.

And something about it
stuck in my gullet.

Stuck in a gullet!

Of course!

Suddenly I knew who the real thief was.

[crickets chirping]

[sighs]

You wanna watch TV?

No. It isn't the same

without Rolly drooling
in all the food commercials.

You two look like a couple of jailbirds
on Mother's Day.

Cheer up, I brought you a visitor.

[Cadpig] Rolly!

[laughter]

Oh, Rolly, we missed you.

But if Mayor Pig catches you here...

After tonight, Mayor Pig
will be pinning medals on the kid.

What do you mean?

You'll see tonight at the stakeout.

[Lucky] But we already staked out
the tower and didn't see a thing.

[Spot] We felt something, though,
and heard it.

See, we've been watching the tower
from the outside,

but I think this is an inside job.

It bothered me
that Rolly could eat so much kibble.

Even his stomach
would have trouble holding it all.

No offense, kid.

None taken.

Besides, a heist like this
takes organization,

distribution, manpower.

Like the finger of a well-paid stoolie,

everything points to one person.

We'll know soon enough
if my theory is correct.

[screams]

[groaning]

Cannonball!

Now, we wait.

[munching]

Quietly!

Sorry.
[gulps]

-This is it.
-[rumbling]

What's happening?

It's being taken from below!

Hey, I had a dream like this once.

[all screaming]

I knew it!

[train whistle blows]

[gasps]

[screams]

Whoa!

[whistle blows]

[gasp]

[grunts]

Huh?

[grunting]

Good-bye, chicken!

Who you callin' chicken?

[fighting grunts]

You'll never get away with this,
Swamp Rat!

I've got just one word for you.

Wait!

[screams]

[straining]

[tires screeching]

[crashes]

[tires screech]

Spot! I mean, Marlowe. Are you all right?

The day I let a little train wreck stop me
is the day I hang up my fedora.

But the culprit took it on the chin.

[chuckles]
But he has one.

[moaning]

Once I blew a hole in the rat's alibi,

all the pieces began to fall into place.

You see, I remembered something.

[Spot]
When I went into the gator's gullet,

[growling]

...the Swamp Rat's cast
was on his left leg.

When I emerged a few minutes later,
the cast was on his right leg.

[Swamp Rat groaning]

He probably took it off for a good scratch
and put it on the other foot.

Trusting, of course,
that the impact to your psyche

of being swallowed alive by a huge,
carnivorous reptile

would distract you
from noticing the switch.

[chuckles]

Congratulations, Marlowe.
You solved another one.

And, uh, thanks.

[Spot] Roger had no idea why his train

suddenly showed up again
in the barnyard,

but he was glad to get it back.

Even if it was a little worse for wear.

Rolly was welcomed back to the barnyard

with special midnight kibble privileges,

and a public apology
from the Mayor and Lieutenant Pug.

As for the Swamp Rat,

he was forced to return
all the stolen goods

he hadn't already sold
on the black kibble market

and replace the rest.

[scoffs]
I'd say he learned the hard way

that crime doesn't pay.

And even when it does pay...
[scoffs]

...it doesn't pay much.

And even when it pays a lot,
the check always bounces.

And even if it pays cash,
the bills will be counterfeit.

Oh, yeah, and even if the...

[mumbling]

Hey, I still had some metaphors left!

Some people never know when to quit.

[theme music playing]