03x16 - To Tear Is Human

[bunniefuu]

[quirky music playing]

Did you hear what happened to Kevin
in the cafeteria today?

It was so funny.

He turned around, bumped into a pole,
and dropped his lunch tray.

Talk about embarrassing.

I know, what a crack-up.

Okay, I better hang up too.

Bye, Jennifer.

You should have seen it, Dinah.
Everybody was laughing.

Except Kevin that is.

[meows]

Okay, I felt a little sorry for him,

but, come on, if he could have seen
himself standing there

with goulash all over his shoes,

he should have had
a sense of humor about it.

And speaking of that,

I think I'll visit a place
where things are never too serious.

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here
On the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

-[chattering]
-[clears throat] Loyal subjects!

Once again it is time for charades
here at the palace.

[cheering]

Thank you. Thank you. But before we begin,

the official charades timekeeper
will read the official charades rules.

-[groaning]
-Hey, stop that.

Rules are rules.

And the first rule is,
Rabbit has to read them.

[pop music playing]

♪ You can't play baseball
With a croquet mallet ♪

♪ No card games allowed
On a basketball court ♪

♪ Score cards can't read
Like election ballots ♪

♪ One set of rules for one sport ♪

♪ 'Cause rules are rules ♪

♪ And you have got to learn them ♪

♪ Rules are rules ♪

♪ Think of them as tools ♪

♪ 'Cause rules are rules ♪

♪ To play miniature golf
You must follow the course ♪

♪ If you play Clue, consider the source ♪

♪ If no one knows trump
Bridge would fail ♪

♪ Monopoly players would end up in jail ♪

♪ 'Cause rules are rules ♪

♪ And you have got to learn them ♪

♪ Oh, rules are rules ♪

♪ Think of them as tools ♪

♪ 'Cause rules are rules ♪

♪ Rules are rules ♪

Now, Rabbit, please proceed.

[clearing throat]

[clearing throats mockingly]

"Charades is played
by teams of two or more.

Each team is given a word or phrase,

one member of the team acts it out,
the other one tries to guess it.

The actor-outer may not speak
or make any sound.

The team that guesses their word or phrase
in the shortest amount of time wins."

-[cheering]
-Charades!

All right. All right.

All right, the first team up,
the Tweedles.

-[cheering]
-Alrighty.

Okay.

-[whistle blows]
-One word, sounds like...

Uh, drink?

Water. Thirsty. Glass.

Sounds like glass.

Bass. Brass. Class. Pass. Uh, grass.

Sounds-- Grass. The word is grass.

What do you mean? There's more?

You said it was just one word.

Okay. Grass.

Kangaroo. Grass.

Frog. Grass, hop.

Uh...

Grass, hop? Grasshopper.

Grasshopper. Grasshopper.

Oh, very good.

So the word was a compound word.

Yeah, very clever.

The old "take two words and put them
together to form one new word" trick, eh?

Right. Just like bulldog, cowboy,
turtleneck or sunflower.

Grasshopper is one word
made out of two other words.

I see grass and hopper.

Yes, in fact, for today's game,

all the words will be compound words.

Now, Hatter and Hare, it's your turn.

[cheering and chattering]

-[Hare] Okay. Here we go. Okay.
-All right. All right.

-[whistle blows]
-Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

-Jellyfish!
-Right!

-[laughing]
-Yowza!


That's amazing.

No way. How did you get that so fast?

Well, I could see Hatter
was making scrambled eggs.

Now he knows I don't like scrambled eggs,

I prefer mine poached with a side order
of whole wheat toast and strawberry jelly.

And of course the obvious compound word
that starts with jelly is jellyfish.

Well done, Hare.

Next up, the Walrus and Alice.

[cheering and chattering]

-Walrus! Walrus! Walrus!
-Alice! Alice! Alice!

[whistle blows]

Shotput.

Hot-potato.

-[fabric ripping]
-Oh!

Riptide.

No fair! She can't make any sounds.

Uh-oh.

I think I split my pants.

That's a terrible problem.

I've heard of having a rip-roaring time
but this is ridiculous.

It isn't funny, you guys!

They're just teasing you, Alice.

Exactly. There's no reason
to get all torn up about it.

Stop. Stop that, all of you.

Can't you see
the poor child's embarrassed.

The important thing is,
how does this affect the game?

[chattering]

According to rule 17...

Oh, here.

Any player whose trousers gets split
while acting out a word,

is disqualified
until those trousers are fixed.

Sorry, Alice.

Well, I don't care
because I'm not playing anymore.

-But you--
-Alice.

Oh, Alice.

Borrowed a robe from the queen, I see.

Lovely. lovely.

Uh...

Right. But don't worry,
your trousers will soon be mended,

and then before--

Oh, carrot sticks!

I can't seem to keep this needle threaded.

Careful.

Don't poke yourself.

Oh, please, Cat.

Can't you see I'm trying to sew.

I can see you're only doing
our "sew-sew" job.

I beg your pardon, Cat.

I'll have you know I am an expert
with a needle and thread.

Just look.

Oops.

Bunny, you keep me in stitches.

So, Alice, I heard you were playing
charades, but then you split.

So, Alice, I heard you were playing
charades, but then you split.

I don't want to talk about it.

There, you see, Cat. Alice does not wish
to discuss her little faux pas.

What are you talking about?

I'm the one with four paws not Alice.

Not four paws, faux pas,
it's French for "false step."

We use it to mean an embarrassing
mistake in front of other people.

Well, whatever you call it,
it was humiliating,

and completely embarrassing.

I wanted to crawl away and hide.

Well, I've never been that humiliated,

but I do know what it's like
to want to disappear.

-[cackles]
-Great.

The Cat knows what happened
and he wasn't even there.

I bet there isn't a person in Wonderland
who hasn't heard I ripped my pants.

Yeah-- Alice. Alice. Alice.

You're taking this far too seriously.

People have better things to do

than gossip about you
ripping your trousers.

After all,
it isn't exactly front-page news.

[Alice] "Alice plays charades
by the seat of her pants."

Oh, no!

[Walrus humming]

Ah! Alice, you've seen today's headlines,
have you?

I don't wanna talk about it.

The look on your face is priceless.

[laughs] What? Oh.

Pinniped wants to know
if you'd autograph the picture for him.

Only if your invisible friend
can tell me how to be invisible too.

[laughs] Alice, you're such a kidder.

That reminds me,
I remember once when Pinniped--

Oh, you tell her, I can never keep
a straight face for this story.

Uh-huh. [laughing hysterically]

Can you top that, Alice?

And in front of the whole school, no less.

Look, Mr. Walrus,
can we change the subject?

I don't want to make a big deal
about this anymore.

Oh, don't be modest.

Look at that headline,
you're famous far and wide.

[pop music playing]

♪ You're famous far and wide ♪

♪ It fills my heart with glee ♪

♪ That your picture's in the paper ♪

♪ For everyone to see ♪

♪ You're famous far and wide ♪

♪ So give yourself a hand ♪

♪ The most celebrated citizen ♪

♪ In all of Wonderland ♪

♪ Everybody loves a story ♪

♪ That's just what you are ♪

♪ Amusement for the public ♪

♪ Like a famous movie star ♪

♪ Word is spreading quickly ♪

♪ It's amazing how it flows ♪

♪ It won't be long now, my dear
'Til everybody knows ♪

♪ You're famous far and wide
It fills my heart with glee ♪

♪ That your picture's in the paper ♪

♪ For everyone to see ♪

♪ You're famous far and wide ♪

♪ So give yourself a hand ♪

♪ The most celebrated citizen ♪

♪ In all of Wonderland ♪

♪ Famous far and wide ♪

Well, Alice, when would you like
to get together for charades practice?

You're joking, right?

No, in fact, due to the-- ahem
--early conclusion of the last game,

the queen has agreed to hold
another charades party later today.

Fine. But I'm not coming.

Of course you are, you're my partner.

No way. After being humiliated
in front of all my friends,

I wouldn't play charades again
for all the crumpets at the tea party.

Well, I can't play alone.

Sorry, Mr. Walrus.

I can't face all those people
laughing at me.

You'll just have to find another partner.

This is hopeless,
you're just not getting it.

It was not a good clue
and I can prove it to you.

Do me a favor?

Look at Pinniped.

Do you have any idea what he's doing?

Um, no.
In fact, I'm not even sure where he is.

I told you, no offense, old chap,
but charades just isn't your game.

You're playing charades with Pinniped?

Um, pardon me for asking,
but isn't playing charades

with an invisible partner
kind of difficult?

Well, I'll say, and as you can see
he couldn't act out

a decent clue if he had to.

[groans]

Why aren't you practicing with Alice?

She won't play charades anymore.

She feels humiliated
because of what happened this morning.

She's humiliated? Dum and I are the ones
who were really embarrassed.

Hatter and Hare guessed their word

What's the big deal
about a little rip in her pants?

We've all been embarrassed
in front of friends before.

Speak for yourself, nothing like that
has ever happened to me.

Oh? What about the time in third grade
when you started laughing at lunch,

and milk came out of your nose.

[laughing]

I told you never to mention that.

-[cackles]
-What am I going to do?

I love charades,
but without a partner I can't play.

No sweat, Walrus, we'll talk to Alice.

I'm sure once she realizes
it was all just a silly accident,

she'll be your partner again.

And if not, maybe you can find
another partner.

-Who wears stretch pants.
-Oops.

[laughing]

Oh.

This is so exciting.
It's going to be great, just great.

What's going to be great?

I'm sorry, I can't say.
I've been sworn to secrecy about it.

No, you've been sworn to secrecy
about giving Dormouse tickets

to the Wonderland Cheese Festival
for his birthday.

You're sending me to the Cheese Festival?

-Oh, boy!
-I told you he'd guess.

We found her, you guys.

Alice, great to see you.

I don't know how much
the Tweedles told you,

but you are in for quite a treat.

We feel really bad
that you were humiliated at charades.

So we want to prove to you
that as far as we're concerned,

it's all water under the carpet.

Hare, if you're trying to say
it's all forgotten,

shouldn't the saying be
water under the bridge?

No, I meant water under the carpet.

I've been having the worst luck
with my plumbing lately.

Okay, what's the surprise?

It's like this, Alice,

we want to help you look back
at what happened and laugh.

None of us meant to make fun of you.

We want to see
if you can rub your stomach

and pat your head at the same time.

Yeah, but most of all we want you
to feel better about yourself,

to look back fondly at your torn trousers

and not be embarrassed by them.

[country music playing on phonograph]

♪ Things just aren't the same
Since we played the game ♪

♪ Now everybody's heard about her tear ♪

♪ She was working on a clue
But now she's feeling blue ♪

♪ Since we all saw her underwear ♪

♪ And it just tears me up
It really tears me up ♪

♪ The odds were a thousand to one ♪

♪ It was like a funny dream ♪

♪ Ripping her pants' seam ♪

♪ Right there in front of everyone ♪

♪ Whoa-oh ♪

♪ Well, she's front page news ♪

♪ And she's getting rave reviews ♪

♪ Ever since her little faux pas ♪

♪ The tight pair of pants
Never had a chance ♪

♪ It's the funniest thing I ever saw ♪

♪ And it just tears me up ♪

♪ It really tears me up ♪

♪ The odds were a thousand to one ♪

♪ It was like a funny dream
Ripping her pants' seam ♪

♪ Right there in front of everyone ♪

♪ Whoa-oh ♪

So, what did you think?

Be honest now,
we're thinking of doing a video.

That was supposed to make me feel better?

All I want to do is forget what happened.

And you've turned it
into the latest dance craze.

-How true that is?
-Yee-haw!

Go ahead, laugh, make fun,
but count me out.

From now on you won't have Alice
to kick around anymore.

Is it just me or did that not quite go
the way we planned it?

[laughing]

You'll pardon us, but what's so funny?

Old pictures from my college days
at Bug U.

Here I am at graduation.

-Oh, that's funny.
-[both chuckle]

Remember when you had
a haircut like that, Pinniped?

No, it's good you can laugh at yourself.

Perhaps if Alice could do that,
I'd still have a partner for charades.

Oh, you mean the pants. Yes, I heard.

No one else cares what happened,
but Alice is taking it quite seriously.

If Alice won't play,
couldn't Pinniped be--?

Oh! He doesn't want to talk about it.

Actually, I was hoping you
could be my partner this afternoon.

Sorry, I'm going to a concert
by my favorite cricket quartet.

However, perhaps this story
would be of interest to you.

Once there was a young hyena
named Phillis,

who was very serious.

Even though your average Hyena
will laugh at the drop of a hat,

no one ever saw Phillis
so much as smile.

However, Phillis had a secret.

Whenever she was alone,
she enjoyed reading elephant jokes.

You see, Phillis liked to laugh.

But because she thought her laugh
sounded silly,

she was too embarrassed
to let anyone hear it.

Then one day,
Phillis was in the mood for a chuckle.

She opened her joke book,
thinking she was alone.

Unfortunately, she wasn't.

"Go ahead, make fun of my silly snicker
and my goofy giggle,"

Phillis cried.

"I've laughed for the last time."

Phillis' friends liked how she sounded,
especially the goofy giggle.

"Could you teach us to laugh like that?"
they asked.

Phillis realized she had been silly
to be embarrassed.

She agreed to become their laugh teacher.

And even put out a "how to" book,

a series of instructional tapes,
and a video.

You see, although Phillis didn't have
the last laugh...

it turned out that she had the best one.

Oh, yes, I agree.

Maybe we should get
this hyena's phone number.

Perhaps she can give Alice a few lessons.

Uh, no. You see, it's just a story.

The point of which is
one shouldn't be too easily embarrassed.

Yes, we see.

However, we don't see
how to make Alice see.

You can't.

I'm afraid Alice will have to learn
the lesson herself.

Yes, but something must be done.

Come along, Pinniped,
we can't undo what happened to her pants,

but we can help her feel better
if she'll give us half a chance.

[Walrus]
"All of Wonderland Apologizes to Alice."

[Walrus]
"All of Wonderland Apologizes to Alice."

Great idea, Walrus.

That should help Alice
forget all about her faux pas.

Right. Now let's get
the rest of these headlines out there.

Okay.

"What Pants?
We've Forgotten About It Already!"

"Pants, Schmants! Let's Play Charades."

"Come On, Alice! Pretty Please?"

Ah, Alice, I'm so pleased you decided
to be my charades partner again.

You know the old saying,

a day without charades
is like a day without--

-Sunshine?
-Clam chowder, actually.

But I guess sunshine fits the same too.

Well, after I read all those stories
in the newspapers

saying no one would mention my ripped--

Uh, my faux pas from earlier today,

I decided to give the game one more try.

That's the spirit.

After all, what are the odds
that you'll humiliate yourself

twice in the same day? Hm?

[chattering]

Why are you all dressed
to play field hockey?

[laughing]

No, Alice,
these are the new charade uniforms,

and we have you to thank for them.

Here. You better put these on.

You see, Alice,
your little, uh, mishap this morning

made us realize that charades
is more than a word game.

It's a contact sport.

So from now on all charades players
must wear the proper safety equipment.

Remember, a safe charades player
is a happy charade player.

Also, I've placed pillows all around.

Just in case
any one of us should, uh, trip.

And the floor is freshly mopped,

so that none of us will get
embarrassing dirt on our clothing

if we should happen to fall
while acting out a word.

Now shall we begin?

[laughing and chattering]

Once again,
you'll be acting out compound words.

Single words made
by putting two other words together.

Now, Alice, in honor of your return,
your team may go first.

-Walrus! Walrus! Walrus!
-Alice! Alice! Alice!

Go!

[whistle blows]

Jumpstart.

Oh, come on, it wasn't that bad a guess.

Oh, I know, it's the clue.

I know, scaredy-cat.

Scaredy-bird.

Scare... Scarecrow.

The compound word is scarecrow.

Whoa!

Alice, are you all right?


[laughing]

Uh, why is she laughing?

Can't you see,
the poor girl is so humiliated,

she laughs for fear she'll cry.

No, I used to feel that way

but that was before
I saw myself in the mirror.

You do look pretty funny.

Not that we would laugh at you.

That's okay, go ahead.

I've been taking myself too seriously
long enough.

Oh, you're not angry anymore?

Are you kidding?

This may have been a little embarrassing,
but even I have to admit,

it's also pretty hilarious.

Okay.

[pop music playing]

♪ You have to laugh
Ha-ha, hee-hee, h*-hoo ♪

♪ You have to laugh
At funny things you do ♪

♪ Accidents will happen ♪

♪ Yes, indeed, it's true ♪

♪ You can't take it too seriously ♪

♪ You'll end up blue ♪

♪ You have to laugh
Ha-ha, hee-hee, h*-hoo ♪

♪ You have laugh at funny things you do ♪

♪ Life can be a hoot ♪

♪ If you let it hang loose ♪

♪ A silly mistake
Can cause your heart to break ♪

♪ But you can have a ball
If you let go of it all ♪

♪ So let the laughter roll ♪

♪ Ha-ha, hee-hee, h*-hoo ♪

♪ You have to laugh
Ha-ha, hee-hee, h*-hoo ♪

♪ You have to laugh
At funny things you do ♪

♪ You can have a ball
If you let go of it all ♪

♪ So let the laughter roll
ha-ha, hee-hee, h*-h* ♪

♪ Ha-ha-hee, h*-h*-h*-h* ♪

Dinah, I've been thinking about that kid
who dropped his lunch tray at school.

I know how he felt.

I mean,
it's not easy to laugh at yourself.

Especially when you feel humiliated.

Maybe next time I won't be so quick
to laugh at someone else.

[pants rip]

[laughs weakly]

At least until they start laughing first.

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪