03x39 - A Wonderland Howl-oween

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music playing]

Hey, Dinah. Check out my pumpkin.

-Pretty spooky, huh?
-[meows]

Oh, Dinah. You're such a scaredy cat.

I'll bet black cats
aren't afraid of jack-o'-lanterns.

Actually, it is pretty scary looking,
isn't it?

To be honest with you Dinah,
even I get a little scared on Halloween,

and of things
that don't normally scare me.

Oh, listen to me.

It's just a pumpkin
with a little light bulb in it.

Here. I'll show you.

Heh. See, it's not scary at all,
as long as you leave the lights on.

Well, strange things have been known
to happen on Halloween.

I won't stick around for any of them
to happen to me.

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here
On the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

-Hi, guys!
-[Hatter & Hare] Hi, Alice.

Ooh!
Looks like somebody's going on a picnic.

Yes. Well, it was rude of him
not to invite us.

Terribly rude.

Not that we could've gone,

because as you can see
we're going on our own picnic.

You were the somebody I was talking about.

It looked like
you were going on a picnic today.

-Oh!
-Oh!

-Well, that explains your confusion.
-My confusion?

You thought we're going on a picnic today,

when in fact
we're going on a picnic tonight.

-The traditional Halloween picnic.
-Why are you having a picnic at night?

Well, because we had one last year

and the year before that,
and the year before that.

That's what makes it traditional.

A tradition is something special
you do every year at a particular time.

-Just like making the traditional...
-Oh, yeah!

-Halloween cookies! Ha!
-Whoa!

-Halloween marshmallows!
-Whoa! [laughs]

And the traditional...

Halloween pumpkin soup.

I don't really like the pumpkin soup,

but that's okay
because it's Hare's favorite.

My favorite? I don't like this soup.
Dormouse likes it.

Me? I wouldn't touch that soup
with a 10-inch pole.

If nobody likes it
then why do you make it?

[in unison] We have to.

It's a tradition.

How true that is.

At the traditional Halloween picnic,

it's the most time-honored
tradition of all.

It's the second most
time-honored tradition.

Oh! Of course. What was I thinking?

Uh, that you should never tease
a German Shepherd named Spike?

Yes, that's right.

Just yesterday
I was walking past this pet store,

there was this cute doggy in the window--

Wait a minute.

So, what is the most time honored
tradition at the Halloween picnic?

-Well...
-Well...

We can't tell you. You'll have to come
to the picnic to find out.

But we can tell you this...

[in unison]
It's one tradition you won't wanna miss.

[laughing and chattering]

So now will somebody tell me the most
time honored tradition of the picnic?

Dee, do you wanna be first
to tell Alice a story?

Why don't you tell her the truth?
The poor girl's waited long enough.

Uh, Dum was asking if I wanted
to be the first to tell a story

since the most time honored tradition
of the picnic

is telling stories around the campfire.

Creepy, spooky, eerie stories.

[laughing]

Uh, but don't scary stories just,
well, scare everybody?

Only the really good ones.

-Boo!
-Oh!

[laughing]

Well, come on, Alice.

That's the whole point, after all,
it's fun to be scared.

[pop music playing]

♪ When the hairs
On the back of your neck ♪

♪ Stands straight up and make you think
"What the heck?" ♪

♪ When you hear noises
That you can't explain ♪

♪ And you get a nervous feeling
In your stomach and your brain ♪

♪ You're scared ♪

♪ Ooh! ♪

♪ You're scared ♪

♪ Ooh! ♪

♪ Sitting outside
While the campfire glows ♪

♪ You're not all alone
And everybody knows ♪

♪ It's fun to be scared ♪

Psst! Boo!

♪ When you hear a story
That's really bizarre ♪

♪ And you wish that you were home
Instead of where you are ♪

♪ When your goose bumps jump
And you're ill at ease ♪

♪ When you start to walk
But you've got quivering knees ♪

♪ You're scared ♪

♪ Ooh! ♪

♪ You're scared ♪

♪ Ooh! ♪

♪ Sitting outside
While the campfire glows ♪

♪ You're not all alone
And everybody knows ♪

♪ It's fun to be scared ♪

♪ It's fun to be scared ♪

♪ Ooh! ♪

[laughing]

I'm still not so sure it's a good idea
to tell scary stories on Halloween.

We tried telling them on Christmas,
but they never caught on.

Let's not forget we're adults
who don't scare easily.

But Alice is just a child.
You'll see. It's fun to be scared.

[cackling]

But not too scared.

-Who'll start the storytelling?
-I will.

-Oh!
-Naturally.

This is a story about two brave explorers,

brothers.

A lot like the two of you...

-Boo!
-[laughing]

who set out to explore the mysterious,

uncharted Ooey-Gooey Swamp.

No explorer who had ever entered the swamp

had ever been heard from again.

So, brother, what are you writing today
in your official explorer's journal.

"Captain's log. Swamp date 54-21.2.

My brother and I have been
making our way through this swamp

for 19 days now.

So far, all we've seen is a lot of mud,
a lot of alligators,

-and one really bad fast food place.
-[frogs croaking]

Mm! Put a warning for future explorers.
"Stay away from the Bog Burger."

-[crow cawing]
-Talk about swamp gas.

Well, one thing's for certain.
We certainly haven't spotted

"The Creature From The Ooey-Gooey Swamp."

That's because there isn't one.

It's some silly story
the locals have cooked up

to keep people away from the swamp.

Which means there must be
something very valuable out here.

-Somewhere.
-[mosquito buzzes]

If we're lucky, it's a bottle
of industrial strength mosquito repellent.

[laughing]

I'm a little disappointed
we didn't run into the swamp creature.

I bet I know
why we haven't seen the monster.

He's probably getting his beauty sleep
deep, deep down in the swamp.

You're right. So let's wake him up.

[pop music playing]

♪ Swamp song
It's the thing to do ♪

♪ Swamp song ♪

♪ They tell me somewhere in the swamp
There's a creature doing the stomp ♪

♪ But I don't believe it
'Cause I sure haven't seen him ♪

♪ Sleeping in the goo
Webbed feet instead of shoes ♪

♪ But I don't believe it
'Cause I sure haven't seen him ♪

[roaring]

[Dum] ♪ It's big as a tree trunk
It drips with icky gunk ♪

♪ But I don't believe it
'Cause I still haven't seen it ♪

♪ Swamp song ♪

♪ Get out of the goo ♪

♪ Swamp stomp
It's the thing to do ♪

[whooping]

♪ Swamp song ♪

♪ Get out of the goo ♪

♪ Swamp stomp ♪

♪ It's the thing to do ♪

♪ Swamp stomp ♪

♪ Swamp stomp ♪

♪ Stomp ♪

Say, what's that over there?
Looks like another boat.

Or what's left of one.

Ooh.
What happened to the people on that boat?

I don't know. One thing's for certain,
they'll sure have crummy vacation slides.

Wait. You don't think this had
anything to do with the swamp creature.

Don't be ridiculous.
There's no such thing as a swamp creature.

[Dee laughs nervously] Oh, yeah.

I don't know, brother.
I think something fishy is going on.

[burbling]

[screaming]

[Caterpillar] And to this day no one knows
whatever became of the two explorers.

As for the diary,
it was found on the edge of the swamp.

Curiously, the last entry in the journal

was in a different handwriting.

And so goes the legend
of the Ooey-Gooey Swamp.

Fact or fiction, you decide.

[laughing]

That didn't scare you too much , did it?

Not at all.
I thought the story was pretty silly.

-[gasps]
-Oh. No offense, Mr. Caterpillar.

I can't believe somebody would be scared
by a story about some goofy fish-man.

Don't you agree, Mr. Dee?

Mr. Dee?

It looks like somebody
was scared by my fish story.

[in high-pitched voice]
I-- Ahem. I-- Ahem.

[in normal voice] I'm not scared.

Didn't your mother teach you
it's rude to point?

-You wanna hear a real scary story?
-Yeah.

Just listen to this.

A long, long time ago
in a kingdom far, far away,

there lived a queen
and her trusty right-hand rabbit.

For five straight nights,
the queen had been unable to sleep

because of strange, spooky,
unearthly noises

coming from somewhere in her palace.

-[creaking and chains rattling]
-Oh, Rabbit! Rabbit!

Oh! Rabbit!

[gasps] Oh!

Yes, Your Majesty?

Those strange, spooky,
unearthly noises have got to stop.

They're keeping me awake.

-I'm sorry, Your Majesty.
-[ghostly moaning]

I won't stay up watching
the Bunny Shopping Club anymore.

I don't mean the TV!

I meant there are other things out there.

[creaking]

-You don't mean...?
-I do.

Things that go bump in the night.

[pop music playing]

♪ The scary noises in the night
Surely are a dreadful fright ♪

♪ The spooky sounds have got to go
So search the palace high and low ♪

♪ Let's go and find those scary sounds
They're coming from the underground ♪

♪ They surely are a dreadful fright
Things that go bump in the night ♪

♪ I've got to get to sleep somehow
So go and find those noises now ♪

♪ They're really strange, unearthly too
And I can't sleep until you do ♪

♪ It's not that I'm a scaredy cat
But I must sleep and that is that ♪

♪ They surely are a dreadful fright
Things that go bump in the night ♪

-[chains rattling]
-[gasps]

I believe I have the solution
to our problem.

You'll search every nook
and cranny of the palace,

until you find the strange,
spooky, unearthly creature

that's making those awful noises?

Uh...

-Close.
-Oh.

I got these earplugs

so I don't have to go anywhere near
the strange, spooky, unearthly creature

making those awful noises.

-Earplugs?
-Yes, you see, with these in our ears,

we won't hear the things
that go bump in the night.

-[chuckles]
-Oh!

[floorboards creaking and chains rattling]

There! You see? You can't hear a thing!

-What?
-What?

What?

What? Oh!

The earplugs, Your Majesty!

What?

I said, "Take out your earplugs!"

You don't have to yell. I'm right here.

Sorry, Your Majesty, but as you can see,

with these in our ears,
we'll be able to sleep again!

Take those out.

-What?
-Oh!

I said...

-Ah!
-[groans]

Oh, this is ridiculous.

These earplugs don't solve the problem.

They just hide the problem that there's
some strange, spooky, unearthly creature

down in the catacombs.

[gasps] The catacombs?

Were you looking for me?

No. I didn't say cat. I said catacombs.

Those are spooky underground
passageways beneath my palace.

Where we've never had the nerve
to explore before.

Then why not let a cat be your guide
through the catacombs?

[laughs]

[haunting music playing]

[voices whispering indistinctly]

-Are you scared?
-Oh, no, Your Majesty.

-Not much.
-Oh! Oh! Oh!

You should be because you'll be
stuck down here dusting for the next year.

That should make
for one very large dust bunny.

[cackling]

-[thuds]
-[gasping]

Oh, what was that?

That's my cue to get out of here.
It's been nice knowing you.

Wait, wait! You can't go.
We don't know our way around down here.

Oh, drat that cat!

-[gasps] Oh!
-[organ playing haunting music]

-Where is that music coming from?
-Why, from an organ, Your Majesty.

Probably a pipe organ.
Though possibly broke. I can't be sure--

Oh, stop that!

Where in the catacombs
is that music coming from?

It sounds like it's coming
from that direction.

-Yes.
-It's getting louder.

-[man laughs]
-Not only louder, Your Majesty.

-[polka music playing]
-It's also getting catchier.

-In fact, that's polka music.
-Oh!

[laughs] Oh!

[haunting music resumes]

Rabbit! Rabbit, I know it's scary,

but we've got to find out
who's playing that music.

Come on. Follow me

No, no, no...

Rabbit!

[playing classical music]

He looks like a phantom.

[stammering] Phantom of the palace.

I've got to know what he looks like
underneath that mask.

Go, Rabbit. Rabbit.

[plays dramatic sting]

[plays dramatic sting]

-[plays dramatic sting]
-[roars]

[dramatic music playing]

[percussion plays on recording]

[playing upbeat music]

But sometimes, late at night,

you can still hear
the sound of organ music

drifting out from somewhere
behind those palace walls.

Whoa.

Good story, Dee.

Oh, come on, Alice. You can't tell me
that wasn't a scary story.

Well, to be honest, I thought that
was even sillier than the first one.

Well, Rabbit doesn't seem
to agree with you.

[yelps]

Oh, for goodness' sakes.
That story wasn't that scary

I'll tell you one
that will curl your whiskers.

Oh!

I'll appreciate that, Your Majesty.

This is a story of a hatter and a hare...

Oh! Whoa!

who learned the terrible secret
of the werehare.

-[gasps]
-Half hare and half monster.

The two friends were returning
from a fateful camping trip...

on the night of a full moon.

Oh, gosh. I sure didn't expect
to be this late getting home.

We would have been home hours ago

if someone hadn't insisted
we stop at that roadside tourist trap.

Don't you think it was worth it
just to see the 200-pound hamster?

Well, yes, but I would've thought you had
had your fill of weird animal stories

after what those villagers
were saying about the werehare.

But the hamster was real.
The werehare was just a story.

I don't know how that strange old woman

could even tell it to us
and keep a straight face.

-What was her name again?
-I think it was Maria Ouspenskaya.

Right. Oh, and she warned whoever gets

even a teeny-tiny,
eensy-beensy scratch from a werehare,

will become a werehare himself
at the time of the full moon.

And will need to buy a flea collar.

[pop music playing]

[pop music playing]

♪ Late in the evening
With the full moon rising high ♪

♪ In the darkness of the forest
You might hear a haunting cry ♪

-♪ It could be a hungry wobear ♪
-♪ Or just a wise old owl ♪

♪ But you'll always recognize it
By its howl ♪

♪ Beware, beware
There are werehares everywhere ♪

♪ Tell me, how much hair
Could a werehare wear ♪

♪ If a werehare could wear hair? ♪

-♪ It's ghastly ♪
-♪ It's grisly ♪

-♪ It's grim ♪
-♪ And gross ♪

-♪ And gruesome ♪
-♪ And lastly but not leastly ♪

♪ It hasn't graced this twosome ♪

♪ They say meta-lago-morphosis
Is extremely rare ♪

♪ So we really must admit
We're not that scared ♪

♪ Beware, beware
There are werehares everywhere ♪

♪ Tell me, how much hair
Could a werehare wear ♪

♪ If a werehare could wear hair? ♪

♪ Beware, beware
There are werehares everywhere ♪

♪ They'll frighten you by biting you
Then you'll be a werehare too ♪

Hey. What happened to your hand?

Oh, it's nothing. It's just a teeny-tiny,
eensy-beensy scratch.

I noticed it when I woke up.

Probably some little animal got in my tent

in the middle of the night
and scratched me.

Maybe it was the werehare.

[phone ringing]

Gee, I wonder who that could be.

I don't know,
but I guess I should answer it.

[ringing continues]

Hello?

Mom? How did you know I was here?

[stammers]

Yes, Mom. I'm wearing my long johns.

Yes, Mom. I brought a sweater.

[dramatic music playing]

Yes, Mom. I thought of that
before leaving the camp grounds.

I walked home late
from the campgrounds a hundred times.

There's nothing dangerous out here.

[growling]

Hold on. Hare, don't growl at me.

I'm talking to my mother.
I'll be off in a minute.

Sorry, Mom. Yeah, that's Hare.

-No, he's just making noises.
-[panting]

Hold on.

Whoa! I know we've been out camping
but didn't you brush your teeth?

Here, have a breath mint.

Sorry. Yeah, I'm back.

Yeah-- Oh. Oh!

Nothing personal, but it's time
for an appointment at the grooming parlor.

I'd say it's time for a trim.

[growls]

Really, Hare.
You have the manners of a werehare.

Werehare?

-[howls]
-[screams]

Goodbye!

[Red Queen] And so...

the poor mild-mannered hare
was cursed for the rest of his life.

Doomed to become
a snarling, howling werehare

on the night of the full moon.

A night like tonight.

-Whoa!
-[teeth chattering]

Boy, that was a pretty scary story.

Hare, are those your teeth
we hear chattering?

I'm afraid so.
Unless somebody else brought a set.

Mr. Hatter. You weren't scared
by that story, were you? It was fun.

Oh, sure, fun. Like the story
about the phantom of the palace.

-Or that one about the swamp creature.
-[chattering]

Oh, look at all of you scaredy cats.

After you gave Alice such a hard time,
now you're all spooked and she isn't.

She's smart enough
to know monsters aren't real.

[creature roars]

[gasps] What was that?

Sounded like a growl.
The kind a swamp creature might make.

Actually, it was just my stomach.
Let's eat.

-Oh!
-Finally.

[laughing]

-[haunting organ music playing]
-[gasping]

Listen.
It's the phantom of the palace playing...

Nonsense, Rabbit.
[stammers] It's probably just the wind.

-[creature howls]
-[gasping]

[stammers]
You don't suppose that could be a...

Werehare!

[yelling]

Wait a minute!

There's no such thing as a werehare,
or a swamp creature, or a phantom.

Oh, for goodness' sake.

The next thing you know
they'll start believing in ghosts.

[haunting music playing]

You know, Dinah, it's okay to be
a little afraid of the dark on Halloween.

After all, it's fun to be scared.
As long as you're not too scared.

Besides, it would be a shame
to waste a scary pumpkin like this.

Happy Halloween, Dinah.

-[chuckles]
-[meows]

[haunting music playing]