03x31 - To Be the Flea, You Gotta Beat the Flea/The Wild Blue Blunder

[bunniefuu]

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

ANNOUNCER: Folks,
we got ourselves a real
grudge match here tonight.

So far, Angelo the flea
seems to have the upper hand,

but you can't count out
the Crusher.

The Crusher goes for
a headlock.

But Angelo
is too fast and tiny.

He's got him
in a full nelson.

Angelo Irish
whips the Crusher
into the ropes.

He connects
and delivers a powerslam!

Now Angelo is performing
his signature move,

The Fleabag Motel.

One, two, flea!

-(BELL DINGS)
-(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

ANNOUNCER:
It's all over, folks.

Your winner
is the mighty mite himself,

Angelo the flea!

(CROWD BOOING)

FIGHT COMMISSIONER:
Look, Angelo, you're clearly
the best wrestler around.

But let's be honest,

I'm not giving you
the match against the champ.

Easy! Easy!

Look, I'd like to,
but you got to face facts.

You're way too small.

The audience
can't even see you.

If you put on
a few extra feet,

I would give you
the title shot.

You figure that out,
then come talk to me.

(SNORING)

(ANGELO GRUNTS)

Huh?

Huh!

(LOUD CRASH)

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS)

(WHIRRING)

(GASPS)

(WHIMPERS)

(GASPS)

ANNOUNCER: And now
for the main event,

World Wrestling
Champion Calzone

has issued an open challenge
to anyone in the arena.

I am the champ
and this is my zone.

My Calzone.

(CROWD CHEERING)

Who feels worthy enough
to challenge the champ?

Come on, Calamaniacs.

ANNOUNCER:
We have a challenger,
ladies and gentlemen.

What is this?

(CROWD CONTINUES CHEERING)

You? You think
you're worthy enough
to take on me,

the greatest champion
of all time?

Uh-uh.

(GRUNTS)

Whoa, now you have done it.

It is on!

-(GRUNTS)
-(LAUGHING NERVOUSLY)

Ooh!

Why you... (GROANS)

Huh?

(GRUNTING)

(GRUMBLES)

Enough with the punching.

ANNOUNCER: The champ
chases the challenger.

(GROANS) Ooh!

ANNOUNCER: Oh, boy.
Cal looks really mad.

(CAL SCREAMS)

ANNOUNCER: Ooh!

It appears the champ
is getting a lot more
than he bargained for.

(CROWD CHEERING)

ANNOUNCER:
These fans have gone dog wild!

Sweet sassy molassy!
What a dropkick.

It looks like the challenger
has tried to crawl
out of the ring.

Boy, what a coward.

I am the greatest.

No one beats Cal
in his zone.

ANNOUNCER: Wait, what's this?

(LAUGHING)

ANNOUNCER: Why, the challenger
was rope-a-doping us
the entire time.

(GROWLS)

The challenger seems
to have all the momentum.

Incredible, folks!

I have never witnessed
a comeback a quick
and effortless as this one.

Looks like Cal is down
for the count.

(GROWLS)

I think
he's gonna take us
to the danger zone.

The danger Calzone.

Do you want to
go to the zone?

Do you want
to go to the zone?

I cannot hear you.

CROWD: Zone! Zone!
Zone! Zone!

(BARKING)

ANNOUNCER: Oh, my!
That dog's days are over.

Now, get out of my zone!

(CHUCKLING)

ANNOUNCER: One, two, three.

-(BELL DINGS)
-It's all over.

We have a new champion!

This...

This random dog!

- MAN: Yay, random dog!
-(LAUGHING)

-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS FLASHING)

Well, champ,
you may have won the belt,

but in the end,
you got fleeced.

Ah, summertime!
Nothing but swimming,
barbeque...

(ENGINE ROARING)

World w*r One fighter plane?

I'm Baron Yosemite
Von Sam.

And I'mma takin'
this here land.

You can't take this here land.
This is my home.

Not anymore,
it ain't.

And if you don't leave it
right now,

I'll blow you to smithereens.

You know, I've never
been to smithereens.

Is that near Tahiti?

No! It's near
the intersection
of crush and destroy.

Nah, I don't like
that neighborhood.

I think I'll stay
where I'm at.

Then say your prayers,
rabbit.

Actually I prefer
to sing my prayers.

♪ I'm gonna lay down

♪ Lay down my heavy load
Yeah!

♪ Down by the riverside
Yeah!

♪ Down by the riverside
Yeah!

(LAUGHING)

♪ I'm gonna send this

♪ b*mb back into the sky
Yeah!

♪ b*mb back into the sky
Yeah!

♪ b*mb back into the sky
Yeah!

Ha ha!
Baron Yosemite Von Sam
has done it...

(GROANING) again.

♪ 'Cause I don't want
This dirty w*r no more

♪ Ta-da! ♪

Now, where'd
that rabbit get to?

Oh, flight attendant,
could I get a refill
on my coffee?

But I'm flying the plane.

I bought
a first class ticket.

Oh, all right.

Rassum-frassum.

Thanks.
Now can I get a pillow?

And a blanket?
And some peanuts?

And a hot towel?
And a slumber mask?

What's a slumber mask?

They look like this.
Here, try it.

Hey, this is nice.

Why, I could fall asleep.

(SNORING)

Time for me to hit the silk.

That's pilot lingo
for parachute.

Geronimo!

(HORNS HONKING)

Oh, not now, Ma.
I'm still sleeping.

Oh, all right.
I'll get up.

(CLUCKS) Geronimo!

Whoa!

(RUMBLING)

Phew. I'm out of the woods.

(GROWLING)

Oh. Slumber mask?

(SAM SCREAMING)

Geronimo.

Air travel can be
a real bear.

(GRUNTS)
Come back here, rabbit.

(GROANS)

Hey, watch where
you're going, Mister.

(GASPS)

It's the kaiser!

(IN GERMAN ACCENT)
Yes, it is I.

The kaiser,
the head honcho,

the big cheese,
the top sauerkraut.

I am here for
a surprise inspection.

But, I ain't ready for
no surprise inspection.

Not ready? Dummkopf!

You should always be ready
for an inspection.

Now, where is
your airplane?

Oh, it's right over here,
your kaiser-ness.

You call this an airplane?

When I'm lonely
sometimes I call it Becky.

Silence!

This plane is piece of junk.
You need a new one.

Fortunately, I have just
the plane for you.

We call this plane
the Wienerschnitzel.

Because it is made entirely
of Wienerschnitzel.

Seems kind of dangerous.

Not at all.

In fact, I say to all my men
when they're off to w*r,

safety first.

I thought you always said,

"If you don't win the w*r,
don't bother coming home."

That's the other thing
I say.

Now get in your plane!

Holy schnitzel, I did it!
I'mma flying.

(BIRDS SQUAWKING)

I'm going vegan.

(GROANS)

You have experienced
the thrill of victory,

and the agony of defeat.
No matter.

You have proven yourself
a worthy pilot.

For your bravery
I must award you some medals.

Yeah!

The mallet of honor.

The prestigious
air conditioner of bravery.

And let's not forget
the highest honor,

the jet pack of valor!

You know, a simple thank you
would be fine.

Whoa!

Looks like
Sam's got thrust issues.

(SCREAMS)

That's it, rabbit.

Time for you
to face my monster plane.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

Oh, yeah? Well,
I'm not scared of you.

Because I got
an even better plane.

The Sopwith Camel.

(CAMEL GRUNTS)

Oops! I think I ordered
the wrong camel.

Oh, well,
this will have to do.

Rocket camel, go!

(ROCKET WHISTLES)

Where did that varmint go?
I can't see him.

I'm using camel-flage.

Hey, get off my plane.

In order to beat you, Sam,
we'll have to wing it.

(GASPS)

No! (SCREAMS)

(GROANING)

That's the problem with Sam.

He can never
get over the hump.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)