02x52 - Hare to the Throne

[bunniefuu]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

NARRATOR: Once upon a time,
there was a king named
King Bugs.

He ruled over a large
and wonderful kingdom.

The crops grew bounteous
and plentiful.

And the birds all sang
happy tunes.

♪ Figaro Figaro Figaro
Figaro ♪

NARRATOR: Everything was just
as wonderful as can be,

until an evil usurper ambushed
the King.

[LAUGHING EVILY] Ambush!

He took the throne after
throwing King Bugs into
the Cave of Forgetfulness.

From that day forward,

things in the kingdom changed.

Not to mention, the only way

to get food was
to pay the King
in compliments.

Oh, great King,

you're the most handsome
and dashing man in the world.

Give him some slop.

Oh, great King,

your mustache is like
a fierce

ginger lion's mane.

Who are you calling ginger?

Banish her from the kingdom.

Ginger's not an insult!

But there were two
subjects of the King,

that dared to challenge
his authority.

Listen, Bub. I got this slop
an hour ago

and it's cold.

And my associate and I
do not eat cold slop.

I never met this duck before.

Your soup's not cold...

It's on your head.

[LAUGHING]

Are you not entertained?

No.

But they are.

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

You know what we do to
pant thieves around here?

Give em a strong verbal
warning and let 'em go free?

I throw them
in the dungeon. Minion!

[STAMMERS] But I don't
even know the duck.

[GRUNTS]

You can't do this to us.

I know my rights and my lefts.

If only King Bugs were here.

That's why we're going to
break out of here

and go on a quest to find him.

You two are wasting your time.

There's no way out
of this dungeon.

I've been down here
for ten years.

I can't be in here
for ten years.

Oh, it's not so bad.

The food's actually
pretty good.

- Did he just eat a bug?
- Yes, he did.

I got an idea.

- A1.
- Bingo!

[PORKY SINGING GOOD KING
WENCESLAS]

Help this pig. He's got
the Christmas fever.

Christmas fever?

It's a virus where you can't
stop singing Christmas carols.

♪ Deck the halls
with bows of holly ♪

He's been at it for hours.

Oh, this isn't so bad.

-[PORKY CONTINUES SINGING]
- BOTH: Please make it stop!

Only fresh air can cure it.

Here, just get him out of here.

I can still hear it.

It's echoing in my helmet.

I haven't had to deal with
that much garbage
since the last election.

Come on, we gotta
find King Bugs.

I know where he's at.
Follow me.

NARRATOR:
And so they followed
the old weirdo

to the middle
of the Dark Forest.

We have been walking forever.

Where are we anyway?

The Cave of Forgetfulness.

King Bugs is in there.

Well, I did my part.

- DAFFY: You're leaving?
- After ten years in jail,

I got some living to do.

Plus, in the forest

I got all the insects
I can eat.

Ugh, come on.

Wait, he never told us why

they call it the Cave
of Forgetfulness.

Oh, forget that crazy old coot.

Who am I? Where am I?
What am I doing here?

You're Daffy Duck.
You're in the
Cave of Forgetfulness

and you're looking for
King Bugs.

Daffy Duck. Cave of
Forgetfulness. King Bugs.
Got it.

Who am I? Where am I?
Where are my feet?

You're Daffy Duck in the Cave of
Forgetfulness looking for Bugs.

Your feet are under
your legs.

Duck. Cave. King Bugs.
Under my legs. Got it.

Who turned the lights off?
What am I doing here?

[SIGHS] You're in
the Cave of Forgetfulness,

and you are looking for
King Bugs.

I know. Why are you yelling
at me?

'Cause you went into the cave
and kept forgetting.

That doesn't sound like me.

Here, I'll show ya.
Who am I?
Where am I?

Yeah, okay. I see your point.

How are we going to find the
king if we can't remember who
we're looking for?

We need a reminder note.

We are Daffy and Porky,

and we're trying to find
King Bugs.

[STAMMERS] Now, let's go.

Oh!

- Who are you?
- Who are you?

BOTH: Who are we?
What are we doing here?

And what's that thing
around your neck?

It's a sign.

- What does it say?
- I don't know. I can't read.

I can't read upside down.

[BOTH SCREAMING]

This piece of paper says,
we're Porky and Daffy,

and we're trying to find
King Bugs.

You're Porky
and I must be Daffy.

Wait I think you're Porky
because you're a pig.

If I'm Porky and you're Daffy,

then who's this
King Bugs character?

-[BOTH SHRIEKING]
- Trollum can help you find
King Bugsies.

Who are you?

I am Trollum.

You must help me
find the freshness.

I know what you want.
You want fresh air.

We gotta get him
out of this cave.

Follow us!

Sweet, precious...

Freshness!

Wait a minute. I'm not Trollum.

I'm King Bugs.

Heir to the House of Carrots.

Oh, my gosh. It is King Bugs.

Sheesh! I guess we got
thrown off by that
creepy voice he was doing.

I remember everything.

The evil King ambushed me
and stole my throne.

Now, we have to storm the castle
and take it back.

All right men, ready?

Charge!

Ahhh!

ALL: Charge!

ALL: Charge!

ALL: Charge!

[PANTING]

You guys remember how
to get to the castle?

Hey, I see smoke.

Maybe there's a village nearby
where we can ask for directions.

[GROWLING]

Yikes.

[GROWLING]

Well, well, well.

If it isn't former King Bugs
and the village halfwits.

We're the entire
country's halfwits.

Yeah, that's a lot more people.

You stole the crown from me
and I'm getting it back.

I stole it fair and square.

Just like I stole these dragons
fair and square.

I hope you boys
like breakfast,

because you're
about to be French toast.

So long, suckers.

What are we gonna do?

I know what I'm gonna do.

Run!

[EXCLAIMING HISTERICALLY]

-[GROWLS]
-[EXCLAIMING NERVOUSLY]

[LAUGHING]

Wait a second.

That's it! The dragons
are ticklish.

Go for the armpits, the ribs,

the bottom of their feet.

[LAUGHING]

[LAUGHING]

[SLURPS]

Say, once you tickle em'.
These dragons are
actually pretty friendly.

Would you like to help us
get my kingdom back?

Then tonight we ride!

Hey, Boss? What colors were
you're dragons again?

Raging red, mean green and
periwinkle blue. Why?

'Cause I think
they're attacking
the castle.

Out of my way.

They done broke my dragons.

Fortunately for me,

I dragon proofed my castle.

Launch the catapults!

BUGS: They shootin' banana
cream pies at us.

The dragons seem to
really like 'em.

It's a well known fact
that dragons love...

Banana cream pies.

Guys, stop eating the pies.

You're gonna sugar crash.

[GRUNTS]

Wake up you lazy dragons!

We waited the whole story
for the dragons to show up,

and you guys get two minutes
of screen time.

It's no use. The dragons
are in their sugar coma.

Don't worry, guys, we'll tunnel,
under the walls. Follow me.

Phew! Your old righteous
and just king almost
reclaimed the throne.

But no worry. I stopped him.

[CLAPPING WEAKLY]

[CLAPPING LOUDER]

BUGS: Not so fast, Sam.

I'll be taking that crown
back now.

[CHEERING]

Nice try, Rabbit.

According to the laws I wrote
and passed when no one
was paying attention,

the only way
you can become
king again

is to beat me in
a game of thrones.

[CROWD GASPING]

Game of thrones?

What's this game of thrones?

It's a game with thrones.

[LAUGHING EVILLY]

Would you mind holding my sword
while I grab something?

- Sure, Doc.
- Thank you kindly.

The game of thrones is the most
dangerous competition
ever invented.

A cruel and barbaric display
of violence and mayhem.

The game of thrones
is not for the faint
of heart.

A gruesome spectacle,
a sordid affair so odious...

Just tell him how to play
the game!

Pushy.

Two challengers battle
for control of the royal throne,
yada yada yada...

Whoever finds themselves
seated in the throne after
the battle has ended wins.

[PLAYING GENTLE MUSIC]

King Bugs is the winner!

[CROWD CHEERING]

I'll be taking that back.
Thank you.

There's no way I'm gonna lose.

[GROWLING]

Tis' I, Lola, Aunty of Dragons.

Yowza! How do I become
an uncle of dragons?

You have stolen my babies.

And I've come to get them back.

Where are they anyways?

They're outside. They ate
a little too much banana
cream pie.

What? They're not allowed
to eat dessert
before dinner.

Who's responsible for this?

[LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]

Dragon, give this knave
a spanking.

[GROWLS]

[YELPING] Ow, my biscuits.

Anyone harms my dragons again,

they will taste my fury.

Lovely kingdom you have
by the way.

If you're across the Narrow sea,

just give me a ring and
maybe we can hang out
or something.

NARRATOR:
And so, order was
restored to the kingdom.

The sun was shining.

The crops were plentiful.

Smiles returned to the faces
of the people.

And there was dancing
in the streets, all thanks
to King Bugs.

Wait, where are you going?

What good is a kingdom
like this if I don't have
someone to share it with?

NARRATOR: And so,
a new quest was born.

Who am I? Where am I?

What in the blazes
am I doing here?

That's all folks.
What folks?

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]