01x29 - Rezin Bowie, Gambler

[bunniefuu]

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He was a bold adventurin' man ♪

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He battled for right with a powerful hand ♪

♪ His blade was tempered and so was he ♪

♪ Indestructible steel was he

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He was a fighter, a fearless and mighty adventurin' man ♪

- New Orleans in 1830 was scarcely a city of brotherly love.

Speculation was rife and fortunes were won and lost

on the turn of a card.

Gamblers flourished, for gambling was legal,

even if the methods for collecting gambling debts were not.

- Well now, look at this.

What's goin' on?

Wait a minute. I know you two.

I met you at the casino D'Orleans.

You're Andre and you're Paul.

- Oui, monsieur.

- Now who you got under here?

Hey, Slim Spalding!

Let go of him.

- Do not interfere, monsieur.

- I said let him go. Go on!

- All right, monsieur.

- Slim, what's happening?

What's the matter?

- Well, Jim, I run into a streak of bad luck.

- He lies. He is a welcher.

- Here, look.

- We have held it for six months.

- I owe you $500. Signed, Slim Spalding.

- [Slim] Gentlemen, give me time.

- I tell you what I'll do, gentlemen.

I'll take his IOU, and I'll give you mine in exchange.

How's that?

- But, Monsieur,

we do not have the honor of your acquaintance.

- My name's Bowie, Jim Bowie.

- Are you any relation to Rezin Bowie?

- Yeah, he's my brother.

- Ah, that is a card from another deck, eh, Paul?

- Oh, certainement.

Monsieur, we will accept your IOU.

- Why, do you know my brother?

- Oh, but of course, Monsieur.

We are gamblers and he is a gambler.

- My brother Rezin is a gambler?

- Oh, one of the luckiest men in the whole Mississippi.

- He carries a small piece of the shinbone

of a Cherokee Indian.

- [Gambler] Given him by the great Sam Houston.

- He does, does he?

- I warned you Monsieur, even though he is your brother,

do not play cards with him.

- Good night.

- Au revoir.

- Say, Slim, have you heard anything about this?

I mean about my brother being a gambler?

- Well, seems like I did.

But I had no idea he was any kin of yours, Jim.

- Must be some mistake. Gotta be.

My brother Rezin doesn't know a pair of Jacks from a

team of blue-nosed mules.

Come on Slim, I'll buy you a drink.

- Hello, Mama.

- So you're back home again, are you?

- Well that's a fine welcome, I must say.

- How long you gonna stay this time, five minutes?

- Hey, what's got into everybody?

- If you've got a deck of cards on you,

you can just turn right around and get out, James Bowie!

- Mama, what are you mad at me for?

- You know they copies every move that you make.

- Who does?

- Rezin. You gamble and he gambles.

- Oh, why that's nothing to get upset about.

Everybody likes to gamble a little once in a while.

- He doesn't gamble. He's a gambler.

[rueful whistle]

- And now he's off to New Orleans to play in the big games.

- Where is he?

- Oh, he's in there dudin' up in his fine clothes

and his diamond ring.

- Diamond ring?

- Well, hello, brother Jim.

- Hello, brother Rezin.

Well, that's a fancy outfit you got there.

- Well, sure right for up here in the country.

Here. Have a cigar.

- Thanks.

- That's a Emil Amoroso. That's from Havana.

- Mmm. My brand.

Say, I hear you been doin' a little gambling.

- Had a little luck, yeah.

- You goin' someplace?

- I thought I'd go to New Orleans first.

- Oh? Who's going to bring in the sugar cane then?

- Well, you are, I reckon.

- I am?

- Mm-hmm. It's about your turn, isn't it?

You've been getting half the profits, haven't you?

I've been sitting up here in the cane break

while you've been gallivantin' around.

You look after Mama for a while.

- You say goodbye to Rachel?

- No.

- Why not?

- Oh, we sorta broke it off, Jim.

She's much too nice a girl to be tied up with a gambler.

- A gambler? Who?

- Who? Me!

Jim, why don't you go callin' on her?

- Huh?

- She's mighty pretty.

Well, when she gets dressed up.

- Now stop it, Rezin.

You know these New Orleans gamblers.

They'll pluck you like a Thanksgiving turkey.

- You know, I thought cousin Homer was the only preacher

in this family.

- How much money are you taking with you?

- Ten thousand dollars.

- You want to put it up right now?

Save yourself the steamboat fare?

- You mean you'd gamble with me?

- That's what I mean.

- Oh, Jim. Now don't be a fool.

I don't want to take your money.

- You got some cards?

- Yeah.

- Come on then. I'm gonna teach you a little lesson,

brother Rezin.

- Well, all right, but don't say I didn't warn you.

- There's around ten thousand in here.

- Now, uh, how do you want to do this,

so you'll suffer the least?

- Well, you're the gambler, Rezin.

You name it.

- One cut, high card, winner take all?

- Shuffle.

- You know, uh,

gettin' in that cane is going to be a big job.

Awful lot of it.

- Well, let's make this short and sweet,

so you can get started.

- Go ahead and pick one.

- By the way,

I hear you've been usin' that Cherokee shinbone

that Sam Houston gave me.

- Well, you lost it and I found it.

- Let's have it.

- Let's cut for it.

- All right, in the pot.

Well, son, top this one.

King of spades.

- Pretty fair cut of cards, Jim.

- Only four that are higher.

- I'll be stoppin' at the Trianon

in case you get down to New Orleans.

- Mama, now you'd better go inside.

Just a minute, Rezin, you're not goin' anywhere.

- Oh yes, I am.

- Mama wants you to stay, so you're stayin'.

- Oh no, I'm not.

- I'll tell you what you're gonna do.

You're gonna go in there and tell Mama you're sorry.

Then you're goin' over and give Rachel McCullers this

diamond ring.

- All right, you asked for this.

- Now wait a minute, Rezin, I don't want to fight you.

- You put up your hands.

I'm gonna show you who's the Thanksgiving turkey!

- Now will you listen to reason, Rezin?

- You! Don't you hurt him, Jim Bowie!

[punches landing]

[water splashing]

[horse galloping]

- Jim.

- Uh, fell in the horse trough.

My foot slipped.

- Come on over here son, and let me dry you off.

- Thank you, Mama.

Well, he's gone.

- Yes, and we'll never see him again.

I've had two black days in my life, Jim.

Today and one other.

Do you know why you were born in a log cabin in Kentucky?

- That was the other black day?

- No. The day we left Tennessee, we had two thousand acres

and a fine house in Nashville.

And we lost the whole plantation.

- You lost it?

- Everything we had on the turn of a card.

- What? You mean Papa was a gambler?

- He'd gamble on anything.

Can't you see, Jim, that's why I'm so worried?

- Oh, Mama.

- Jim, you just have to go to New Orleans and do something.

- I will. I'll go just as soon as we get the sugar cane in.

A few days can't see him in too much trouble.

Can they?

- Oui, Monsieur?

- Howdy. Mr. Rezin Bowie stayin' here?

- Oui, Monsieur, suite 225.

- 225, thank you.

- No, no, no, monsieur.

Monsieur Bowie cannot be disturbed.

- Why, is he sick?

- No, no, he is asleep.

- Asleep at 12:30?

- Oui, Monsieur.

He will be awakened at precisely one o'clock

by a soft [tongue clicking] knock at the door.

Zen, ze waiter will wheel in ze bedtray.

- You mean he has breakfast served in bed?

- Certainement, monsieur.

Zen he will descend for a shave and a trim

at ze barber shop.

- Well, dog my cats.

- Who shall I say is calling, monsieur?

- Never mind.

I'll just try and get a couple minutes between hot towels.

Slim, there's been a slight change of plans.

He hasn't had his kidneys yet.

Why don't you tell your boys to go have their dinner?

- No, they'll wait.

But Jim, somehow I don't feel quite right about this.

- Why not?

I'll give you back your IOU

and wipe out the five hundred dollars you owe me

and I'll give you ten percent

of everything you're taken for.

I want him to learn a lesson.

I don't care how you do it.

Is it a deal?

- After all you've done for me?

You're darn right it is.

- Good.

- You know, Pierre, I kinda like this little hotel.

I may buy it.

- What are you doing here?

- Why, I've been waitin' to see you, Rezin.

I didn't want to interrupt your breakfast.

- What about the cane?

- Well, I got it in, just like you said.

- What about that little pie-shaped piece

up behind the bayou?

- Yes, sir, I got that in too.

Rezin, now I'm afraid I got some bad news for you.

- Mama's all right, isn't she?

- Oh yeah. Yeah, she's fine.

Of course, she hasn't heard yet, what happened.

- Well, what happened?

- Well you know that ten thousand dollars

that you won from me?

- Yeah.

- Well, I needed the money, Rezin.

I needed the cash.

So yesterday I came here to New Orleans

to try to win it back at the tables.

- You lost again, huh?

- You had my shinbone.

- How much?

- Everything, Rezin. Wiped out.

- Oh, hello, Bowie.

- Hello.

- I'm surprised to see you still have

the price of a haircut.

- I don't.

- Oh, I meant to ask you.

Is that house on your half of the plantation

or your brother's?

- It's on my half.

- Say, what is this?

- Well, Rezin, you might as well know the truth.

I lost my half of the plantation to Mr. Spalding here.

- You what?

- He's your new partner.

Mr. Spalding, this is my brother Rezin.

- Hello, Bowie. How do you do?

I'll be up in a few days to look over the property.

- Now wait a minute.

Jim, who is that man?

- He's a gambler, Rezin.

Honest Slim Spalding, they call him.

- He gonna be livin' in Mama's house?

- Unless I decide to tear it down and build me a new one.

- Oh no, you don't.

Look, my mama stays right where she is.

Now where is this little game of yours?

- Oh now, Rezin, don't you get--

- You be still now.

- Do I understand you'd like to play a little poker?

- I would like to play a lot of poker.

- Rezin, don't play poker with him.

- You shh!

- Any time, sir. Upstairs in my room, number 227.

- Well.

You oughta be ashamed of yourself.

Mama's house!

- I know. It's a black day, Rezin.

- Well, don't worry about it.

I'll win it back.

Now where are you goin'?

- I don't know.

I've been thinking about Texas.

- Oh, Jim, you won't be happy way out there with a heifer.

Here.

- Thank you, Rezin.

- You look awful. Get yourself a haircut!

- Yeah.

- I'll see you later.

♪ Gamblin' man, never press your luck ♪

♪ Too far, too far,

♪ Too far, too far

♪ Oh, gamblin' man,

♪ Oh, gamblin' man

- To the river.

[music continues]

♪ Too far, too far

♪ Too far, too far

♪ Oh, gamblin' man

- Jim?

- Yes, Rezin.

- Could I come with you?

You and me and the heifer?

- I don't think you'll like Texas, Rezin.

- I know I won't.

I like Opelousas.

- Where's your diamond ring, Rezin?

- Oh, I should have given it to Rachel.

- Don't tell me you lost the other half.

- Everything!

- Oh, oh.

[laughing uproariously]

- What's so funny?

- All right, gambler,

come on, let's go upstairs and get the money back.

[laughing]

You see, Slim Spalding is a friend of mine.

I saved his hide once.

We had it all arranged just to teach you a little lesson.

You were being cheated.

- You were cheatin' me?

- Yes sir. Let me give you a piece of advice, son.

Never, never trust a professional gambler.

You gotta know them for what they are, as I do.

- You didn't lose Mama's house?

- No sir.

- You're not goin' to Texas?

- No sir.

- Why don't you mind your own business just for once?

And keep your big nose out of mine?

- Hey, wait a minute.

We gotta go and get the money

and put Mama back on her porch.

- You go put her back. I'm gonna pack.

- Where you goin'?

- I'm goin' to Texas.

And I'll get my own heifer!

[humming]

[knocking]

- Come in.

- Hello, Slim.

- Hello, Jim.

- Well, you did fine. And so fast.

Man, 25,000 dollars? Half our plantation?

- And the diamond ring.

- Yeah, all in a little more than an hour.

I'd say you made quite a k*lling.

- Yep. The young fella sure had a streak of bad luck,

I'll say that for him.

- You should have seen his face.

Well, Slim, let's settle up, shall we?

- What are you talking about, Jim?

- Our deal. You get ten percent of your winnings.

- What deal is that, Jim?

- The deal we made downstairs.

- All we talked about downstairs was that your brother

wanted to do a little gamblin'.

Well, he did that all right.

- Hey, you've got quite a short memory, haven't you, Slim?

- I don't know what you mean, Jim.

- I mean I want that money.

And that paper that Rezin signed.

And while I'm about it, I'd like this Cherokee shinbone.

- I'm sorry, Jim, but old Sam Houston gave me this

a long time ago and I'm afraid it would break my luck

if you handled it.

Why don't you take that brother of yours back upcountry and

let him play poker in the general store?

- Well, dog might--

[fistfighting]

[grunts]

- Please, messieurs, ooh!

[grunts]

- Hey, Rezin, never mind them.

Let 'em go. This is the one.

You all right?

- I think so. You?

- Yeah, fine.

There's your deed.

- Well, that--

- There's your money.

There's your diamond ring.

And here's my Cherokee shinbone.

All right, go ahead and say it.

- I have a little piece of advice for you, son.

- Mm-hmm?

- Never trust a professional gambler.

You have to know 'em for what they are, as I do.

- Yeah, yeah, all right.

And I've got some for you.

You get that fence down between the Bowie

and the McCullers land.

Now Rachel McCullers is a lot prettier than a Texas heifer.

- Yeah, when she's dressed up.

[both laugh]

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He was a fighter, a fearless and mighty adventurin' man. ♪