Sidewalks of New York (1931)

[bunniefuu]

[Nat King Cole singing

"Eastside, Westside"]

♪ Eastside, Westside

♪ All around the town

♪ The tots sang "Ring-a-Rosie"

♪ "London Bridge

is Falling Down" ♪

♪ Boys and girls together

♪ Me and Mamie O'Rorke

♪ Tripped the light fantastic

♪ On the sidewalks of New York ♪

Come on now, Smokey. Put one

over. Gimme something decent.

[children chattering]

Damn, gimme one.

Let me see you hit it!

Give him the works,

right over the plate.

Good morning. I've come to

collect the rent for Mr. Harmon.

You tell Mr. Harmon

I wouldn't pay the rent

until he fixes the windows.

Achilles, Jacques, Louis.

[all together]

Alright, ma.

Coming, ma. Come on.

Are all these kids yours?

Or is this a picnic?

They're mine, thank you.

Don't thank me.

What'd you want, ma?

This man says

he wouldn't fix the windows.

Well, will you fix the windows?

Or do we fix you?

Why, certainly,

we'll fix the windows.

It's always a pleasure

to fix windows.

So start fixing.

[glass shattering]

Why, you little roughnecks.


I'll fix you.

[boys screaming]

Mr. Harmon?

Oh, Mr. Harmon?

What in the world happened to you?

I went down to your tenements,

to collect the rents

and about a 650 hoodlums


walked on me.

Poggle, you don't understand

the psychology of children.

Psychology? Did you see what

what they did to my physiognomy?

Well, go clean it up,

and I'll go down there with you.

I'll show you how to handle

those hoodlums.

My hat and coat.

[children shouting]

He did not touch third!

He didn't touch third!

Say, what do you mean,


"I didn't touch third"?

[children shouting]

- Who says I didn't touch third?

- I said you didn't.

Well, I'm gonna touch it now.

Oh!

[children shouting]

Hey, you guys, a g*ng fight!


Come on over.

[shouting continues]

Poggle, I think you're mistaken

about this neighborhood.

So far this ride

has been very pleasant.

James, please try

and avoid the open sewers.

[honk]

Is he driving in the street?

Yes, and he's a very good driver.

He drove a tank in the w*r.

Well, the w*r's over,


and I'm no tank.

[shouting continues]

Hey, wait a minute.

Don't hit me, I'm on your side.

Oh.

Ha ha ha.

What just happened?

It's those kids, fighting.

Now do you see why


your property is being wrecked?

Ja-James, stop the car.

I'll give those ruffians

a piece of my mind.

[shouting continues]

Come, come, my little men.

Who has the audacity to do

things like that?

Ah!

[shouting continues]

I'm speaking to your fathers,

I'm..

Move, James.

Hey, this is no time to sleep.

There should be a law

against this.

Well, there is one.

But you'd never know it.

[whistles]

Margie.

'Margie Kelly.'

There's a man out there, shaking

stuffings out of your brother.

I'll fix him.

[shouting continues]

Hey, you. Why don't you

pick on a guy your own size?

Ah!

Oh, do you believe in

love at first sight?

Scram, you big lug!

[police whistling]

- Hi, Butch.

- Hi, Clipper.

I'd say great, kid.

You've got all the makings

of a red hut.

How'd we make out here?

300. 350. 60. 75.

Swell, here.

Here's your split, kid.

Gee, Butch, you're a great guy.

Okay, Clipper. Stick to me,

I'll make a big shot out of you.

See you in the morning.

No, I gotta be in court

in the morning.

That flat foot got us

for roughing Harmon.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Well, if that guy gets hard,

just let me know.

Ah, gee.

Thanks, Butch.

Raise your right hand.

Promise to tell truth,

the whole truth

nothing but the truth,

so help you God?

- Yeah.

- Sit down, listen to the judge.

Now, Clipper. Tell the court

how this fight started?

Well, you see, judge..

...we was playing baseball,

and I make a home run..

Yeah, and you didn't touch third!

[Clipper]

'Oh, I did to.'

[children shouting]

Quite.

[engine revving]

Things over started

friendly-like, you know.

We was good friends

and we went out.

He said I didn't make

a home run and I say I..

Please come in quietly.

Now where were we?

Oh and then he says

"I didn't make a home run."

I say "I did."

So, well, we started

a friendly little argument.

[everybody laughing]

[banging gavel]

[Judge]

'Quite'.

Very well, Clipper.

What happened then?

Then this guy get's out of his

car, and knocks me cold.

Oh, I did not.

[shouting]

I want you boys to keep quite.

[Harmon]

'Well, I didn't'.

This is a court room, Mr. Harmon.

See, I told you.

That'll be all, Clipper.

Mr. Harmon, take the stand.

Up...up.

Raise your right hand.

Take off that hat.

Raise your right hand.

Take off that hat.

Raise your right hand.

Place your left one here.

Your left hand, here.

Raise your right hand.

Put down that cane.

Uh! Ow!

Swear to tell the truth, nothing

but the truth, so help you God?

Answer him.

Swear to tell the truth, nothing

but the truth, so help you God?

- No.

- What?

I can't understand

a thing he's saying.

- He's asking, if you swear...

- No, but I know all the words.

Take the stand, take the stand.

Now..

Tell us what happened

on the street yesterday.

Do you believe in

love at first sight?

Mr. Harmon you're becoming

very irksome to this court.

Kindly reconfine your remarks

to the testimony at hand.

Now proceed with the testimony.

Tell us what happened

in the street yesterday.

Well, Poggle and I..

- Fancy meeting you here.

- Sit down!

[everybody laughing]

Here, sit down!

Can't you sit?

Put the chair back.

Sit down...sit!

Order in the court!

Now Mr. Harmon,

did you run into Clipper Kelly

yesterday with your car?

Go ahead.

I said,

did you run into that young man

yesterday with your car?

- Yeah.

- What?

Huh?

Mr. Harmon,

are you hard of hearing?

- Were you speaking to me?

- Yes!

Are you hard of hearing?

No, are you?

[Judge]

'Proceed with your story.'

[Harmon]

'I drove down to inspect my

property..'

I drove down to inspect my

property when..

Your honor, there seems to be

a bee around here some place.

Well, never mind the bee.

Continue with the testimony.

Well, I was attacked

by these hoodlums.

Particularly, by this terrible

boy, right there.

That's a lie, Your honor.

He tried to run over my poor

little brother.

Brother?

Why..

Well, what's the matter now?

- I swallowed the bee.

- Good.

Then we can continue.

Now, were you or were you not

attacked by this boy, before me?

Before you?

When did he attack you?

Were you attacked

by this in front of me?

- Where were you standing?

- Stop evading the question.

[Judge]

'Didn't I understand you to say

you were attacked by this boy?'

Attacked?

No, it wasn't his fault.

I guess I was to blame.

I assume,

let the whole thing drop.

- Well..

- Sit down!

Take off that hat.

Well, for disturbing both

the peace of the neighborhood

and of this court

I fine you $100.

Court is dismissed.

[boys cheering]

Mr. Harmon,

I don't think you understand.

You see, young man,

these poor children

are born in poverty

and reared in ignorance.

The gutter's their cradle,

and later their playground.

They live in the streets.

Lots of them die there

from policemen's b*ll*ts.

The Judge knows all this.

That's why he let you take the

blame today. You can stand it.

Is that young lady really

that terrible boy's sister?

Yes, and his father

and mother too.

If it wasn't for her,

he'd be in the reform school.

Hey, here's you receipt.

You mean to tell me,

we don't get 10% off for cash?

Nope.

Well, this is the last time

we'll do business in this court.

I told you, I'd fix it

right for you.

Clipper Kelly, I'm tired

of getting you out of jams.

I'd poke you in the nose right

here, if I wasn't a lady.

Lay off him, Margie.

He didn't do nothing.

If wasn't for you, he wouldn't

be in these scrapes.

Don't worry, you're alright.

You hear me? I'm telling you.

- You're alright.

- And I'm telling you he ain't.

You're not going with him.

You understand?

- Oh, lay off me.

- I won't lay off you.

Oh, you.

How dare you strike a lady?

You lay a hand on my brother

and I'll mop up

the sidewalk with you.

- He slapped your face.

- It's my face, ain't it?

Oh, I didn't know you liked it.

Uh, Ms. Kelly.

We must make allowances.

These poor children, born in

poverty, reared in ignorance.

The gutter's their cradle,

and cradle's their gutter.

Well, what do you want me to do?

Burst out crying?

Oh, no. No.

I'm gonna come down here

and see how you people live.

We ain't no zoo.

No, I want to do something

for these kids down here.

Say, I've met your kind before.

You're too polite

to be up to any good.

No, you don't understand. I

wanna take 'em outta the gutter.

Give 'em a place to play.

Especially your brother.

You'll have me believe

in that stuff, in a minute.

You'd like it, wouldn't you?

After all,

you're his father and mother.

I never had a father or mother.

- You didn't?

- Orphan.

- Ever since I was born.

- Are you trying to pull me leg?

Oh, I wouldn't think of doing

anything like that.

- I thought maybe I could...

- The best flowers.

- I could...

- Fancy flower.

- That's fine.

- Take one.

- I...

- I grow in my own yard.

I thought I'd come down here...

For your sweet heart,

for your sweet heart.

Sure, sweet heart.

Oh, thank you very much.

Oh, ain't it beautiful?

Oh, but maybe I ain't

ought to take it, really.

Just to show we're friends?

We are friends.

- Oh, it's late, I gotta go.

- So soon?

- Yeah, I must. Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

Oh, you forgot your..

[vase shatters]

- Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

Uh...you won't forget

to water it?

Mr. Harmon,

I was pretty mean to you today.

If I said anything

to hurt you, I'm sorry.

You didn't say anything

to hurt me.

From now on,

nothing could hurt me.

My little friends,

here on K Street

the mothers and fathers of my

little friends, here on K Street

and the little friends, of my

little friends, here on K street

are always welcome, at all hours

to all activities

here in Harmony Hall.

Now my little man,

it gives me great pleasure

to welcome you to

The Harmony Hall Boys Club.

What a baloney!

[indistinct chatter]

- What say we go up the gym?

- That's a good idea.

[indistinct chattering]

Hey, wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

Now listen.

I don't like that Harmon guy.

So, the first one of you mugs

who goes to that gym

gets a bust in the beezer,

from me.

- Where's all the kids?

- They didn't come in.

I guess they didn't like

this gymnasium idea.

Well, what are you

gonna do about it?

Well, what can I do?

Drag 'em in?

Oh, lick before you start, huh?

What kind of a man are you?

Brace up. You've a swell idea to

keep those kids off the street.

Just 'cause they don't come up

and kiss you, you laid down.

You know you prom..

You promised to make a man

out of Clipper.

What do you do? Nothing!

Haven't got any more backbone

than a jelly fish.

I'll bring those kids in here,

if it's the last act of my life.

And they were all cream puffs.

[children shouting]

Hey, come here.

Where are you going

with that ball?

[shouting]

Oh, the kids have come.

Finally, he's got them.

My little friends here

on K street..

- Give us that ball.

- Yeah!

[children clamouring]

Stop! Keep quiet!

That guy in there

is the best friend you've got.

- But he took our ball.

- Yeah!

Shut up!

Listen, I told you to shut up.

So, he took your ball, huh?

Why, you dumb, little mugs.

Look at all he's given you

in return. Look!

Gee, this ain't half bad.

Look at those

funny little doodads.

[indistinct chattering]

- Don't go away.

- No, I won't.

- Harmon?

- Mr. Harmon?

- Mr. Harmon..

- Oh, Mr. Harmon, hurry up.

You've gotta go and tell

the kids how to use them things.

Hey, g*ng. There's nothing left

here to play with. Let's scram!

Come on!

Hey, come on!

There must've been an earthquake.

Oh, yes, and this was

such a nice gymnasium.

Oh, Mr. Harmon, do something.

They're going. Quick, stop 'em.

Oh, boys?

Oh, boys?

[whistling]

Look at him, he's got

his winter underwear on.

Don't you wanna see...

the wrestling match?

[all together]

Wrestling match?

Sure, Mr. Harmon and Mr. Poggle

are gonna hassle.

- Huh?

- Wrestle?

- I don't know how to wrestle.

- So do I.

[children cheering]

[grunting]

[cheering]

Would you mind teaching one

of our guys how to wrestle?

Which one of you little men

would like to learn?

- 'Baloney wants to learn.'

- 'Yeah, teach Baloney.'

[boy #1]

'Baloney.'

[cheering]

- This is Baloney?

- 'Yeah, that's Baloney.'

Oh, after all, I'm a little

rough, I might hurt Mr. Baloney.

[all together]

'No, no, no.'

Always start by taking

a deep breath.

They'll never be able to hold

those kids in there now.

I've done all I can. My head

feels like a rhinoceros saddle.

Can't you think of something

heroic for him to do?

Yeah, he could knock Dempsey out.

But Dempsey isn't here.

- Let him knock you out.

- Can't be done.

- Why not?

- I'm out already.

I got an idea.

You sure, Mr. Mulvaney,

that you know what I mean?

- Okay, where's the 50 bucks?

- You'll get the 50 bucks.

- What happened to your idea?

- Here it is, here.

One round Mulvaney.

Mulvaney is gonna pick

an argument with Mr. Harmon.

Then we'll get the two of them

in the ring together.

Mulvaney is gonna let

Mr. Harmon knock him out.

- God, that's a swell idea!

- Mm-hm.

[bell ringing]

Introducing, One-Round Mulvaney.

Pride and champion of East side.

[cheering]

Here, Homer Van Dyne Harmon,

uptown philanthropist.

[booing]

Go on.

You must not hit below the belt

or any place.

- 'Come on.'

- 'Yeah!'

[crowd shouting]

[mumbling]

Come on, Mulvaney. Sock him!

Oh!

Sock the fella!

Attaboy!

[grunting]

[bell dinging]

[applause]

Oh, boy.

Boy, you were sure good,

Mr. Harmon.

Boy, you sure let him,

that time.

You know how to hit him, boy.

- Hey!

- That's good.

Did you see that Harmon guy?

And I thought he was a lily.

That guy knows

how to use his douce.

'Boy, he's brilliant. Gee,

did you see him, knock him?'

Hey, Mul, how much are they

giving you to lay down?

- What do you mean lay down?

- Don't skull me.

I'll give you a 50 more

to knock him for a loop.

I don't like the guy.

50? Okay kid, I'll knock him.

Put it in me shoe.

[bell dinging]

One, two, three..

...Four..

...Five..

Hey, what are you doing?

Playing a game?

...Six, seven, eight..

...Nine..

Give him one on the chin.

[cheering]

[booing]

Come on, get him right.

Come on.

Come on, back here.

- Oh! Come on.

- 'I'm right here to fight.'

Come on, get outta there.

[grunting]

Come on.

Hit him. Come on.

Come on, Mr. Harmon.

Now you mustn't do that,

Mr. Mulvaney.

[Margie]

Come on there, Mr. Harmon.

[cheering]

[bell dinging]

You haven't forgotten the

agreement have you, Mulvaney?

Don't worry, I'm just acting.

You know, making it look real.

Yeah, well, don't forget.

Hey, listen. He had two

openings in that second round.

Only thing that chapped him was

that left jab of his is no good.

- Stand up, will you?

- Hey, listen.

I wanna tell you about this man.

He can't keep his balance.

Now, pull yourself together

and go in there.

You gotta win this fight.

[cheering]

What's the matter with you?

Raise your backbone.

[Margie]

'Give it to him, sock him.

Don't let him make a fool out of you.'

Oh!

[cheering continues]

One, two, three, four, five,

six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

You're out.

Winner.

[cheering]

Hi, Butch.

What's on your mind?

Nothin' much, Clipper.

Sit down there.

I'm waiting for Lefty.

How are things over at that gym?

I'm hooked to play in a show

they're giving.

Yeah? What are you doing?

Dancing?

I go into a royal palace,

and sh**t Harmon or something.

- You'll sh**t Harmon?

- Yeah.

That guy must be half goofy.

Heh-heh.

I'll have to see that show.

Here you are, chief.

What's this all about?

Keep still kid. You'll find out.

Here, stick out your arms.

What's the bright idea?

Why can't somebody let a guy

in on something.

Yeah, wait till you see this.

- It's gonna be perfect.

- Great.

Well, Lefty, looks like me

and my blonde lady friend here

is gonna pull off

some swell stick ups.

- It's a cinch.

- Come on. Off with it, kid.

Say Butch,

you don't mean real stick ups

with a rod and everything?

Sure, I do.

- Oh, but listen Butch, I...

- Now, wait a minute.

You better do what papa tells you.

- Oh, the duck looks beautiful.

- Oh, and so do you.

[chuckles]

Come on, hurry up.

He's gonna be here any minute.

Come on.

Oh!

Oh, will Clipper be surprised?

- You think he'll like it?

- Like it? Why, He'll love it.

This is the first birthday party

he's ever had.

Mr. Harmon, it's so nice of you

to do all this for Clipper.

There isn't anything

I wouldn't do for...Clipper.

[indistinct talking]

Oh, it's him now.

Come on, quick. Let's hide.

- Hide?

- Yes, no not in there.

Come on, they'll be in here

any minute.

Ssh! Keep quiet.

- Surprise!

- Surprise!

For what?

Why, honey,

it's your birthday.

Well, what about it?

- I brought you some books.

- I got a book.

Why, Clipper, after all

Mr. Harmon's done for you..

He ain't doin' it for me. He's

trying to get in solid with you.

Clipper Kelly,

you march in there

and clean your stuff up

for your birthday party.

And we got ice cream,

and cake, and duck.

Baloney.

You think he'd rather

have Baloney?

Come on, Clipper,

dinner's ready.

Come on, honey.

The duck will get cold.

Clipper, Clip..

- He's gone.

- Gone?

[sobbing]

Oh, you mustn't cry

on an empty stomach.

Now, you sit down.

We'll have a party anyway.

- Now what piece do you like?

- I'm not hungry.

Oh, you must eat,

you'll feel better.

[sobbing]

[sigh]

[Clipper]

'Maybe you're wrong, you see.'

Clipper! He's back.

- Come on.

- Well, what's the matter?

- Is this yours?

- Yeah.

I caught this boy goin' in a

pawn shop downstairs with it.

Come on, son.

Ah, I-it isn't mine.

It's Clipper's.

I gave it to him this morning.

It's his birthday.

- Do you like duck?

- Duck?

You like duck, huh?

Oh, I got the loveliest duck.

You'll love the stuffing.

- Thanks.

- Why, that's alright.

Drop in often.

Well, haven't you got

about enough now?

Margie doesn't come

to dinner every night.

Well, what you gonna do?

Feed her phonograph records?

"Girl of my heart."

Isn't that beautiful?

Yeah.

"Sweetheart of my dreams."

- What a wonderful thought.

- Yeah.

What's the matter with you?

Are you delirious?

No.

Why don't you marry the girl

and get her off of your mind?

That's what I wanna do. But

every time I try to propose..

...I lose my nerve

and don't say a thing.

Well, write her a letter,

send her a telegram

or call her up or some..

Hey. Come here.

I got an idea.

- Say something.

- What will I say?

Oh, anything, to hear

your voice. Read something.

"Spring is here, why not have

your body washed and polished?"

[voice through phonograph]

Spring is here, why not have

your body washed and polished?

There you are.

That's your voice.

Now, propose to Margie,

on the other side.

On the other side of what?

On the other side

of this thing here.

How do I start?

"My fate is in your hands."

"You brought a new kind

of love to me."

"You're driving me crazy."

"If I had a girl like you.."

"I'd climb the highest mountain."

"My one and only.."

"I wanna make you mine."

"Body and soul."

"Till the sands of

the desert grow cold."

"What'll I do?"

"I'd like to kick you

right in the pants."

Ah..

Now, here's your proposal, see?

Tonight, when the lights are low

and Margie's up to your house

play that for her

on the phonograph.

- Do you live here?

- You like it?

[Margie]

Oh.

Gee, what a swell joint this is.

Joint?

[whistling]

- And ain't that the berry.

- Berries?

Say, how long have you

had this joint?

Oh, grandfather Van Dyne

built it 75 years ago.

Gee, but if it was down

in our neighborhood

seventy five families

would live in it.

Well, I must hurry down to the gym

and get things ready

for the show tonight.

There's lot's to be done.

Margie, there's something very

important I want to say to you.

What is it, Harmon?

[voice through phonograph]

Spring is here, why not have

your body washed and polished?

- What?

- Did you see my Rembrandt?

- Your what?

- My Rembrandt.

[voice through phonograph]

My fate is in your hands.

You brought a new kind

of love to me.

You're driving me crazy.

If I had a girl like you.

I'd climb the highest mountain.

My one and only..

I wanna make you mine.

Body and soul.

Till the sands

of the desert grow cold.

What'll I do?

What would you like to do, Harmon?

I'd like to kick you

right in the pants.

[siren blaring]

[whistling]

[siren blaring]

[engine revving]

- Butch.

- Shut up!

Blonde bandit and her pal.

They've gone that way.

[siren blaring]

We gave them the slip.

Hold on to yourself, kid.

Gee, Butch, what do we do now?

There's nobody in the gym yet,

C. So, you slip in there.

If anybody asks you,

what you been doing

say, you've been in

there all the time, C.

Studying your part

for the show tonight.

Hello, Poggle,

everything alright?

Hello, Margie.

Yes, fine thank you.

How did my phonograph

idea turn out?

Not very well,

something went wrong.

Well, isn't she

going to marry you?

Oh, she'll marry me if

I can do something for Clipper

and get him away from Butch.

Well, let me do it.

Why, he's the toughest kid

in town. What could you do?

Well, I've housebroken two

Airedales and three police dogs.

Poggle, sometimes, I think

you're a trifle unbalanced.

Yeah, another week with these kids

and we'll both be sleeping

under crazy quilts.

There's a man undressing

a girl in a Chevrolet.

He'd have a tougher time

in an Austin.

[laughing]

Hey...who do you think

the fellow was in the car?

- Who?

- Clipper.

Clipper? Well, there's

nothing like starting young.

And you don't miss so much.

Oh, but a boy Clipper's age,

carrying it on with women.

My gracious. Tch-tch.

[whistling]

Hello, Mr. Harmon.

Clipper, I'm disappointed

and ashamed of you.

Why?

I saw what you were pulling off

in that car.

What car? I wasn't in no car.

Don't lie to me,

I saw everything.

I don't know

what you're talkin' about.

Maybe this long blond hair

will explain it.

This sort of thing will

only land you in jail.

Think it over.

Butch, Harmon's wise

to the whole racket

the-the blond wig and everything.

Yeah, I know,

I heard everything, kid.

Well, can't we blow Butch?

Can't we?

Of course not.

You get ready for the show

just like nothing happened.

What if Harmon tells somebody?

Now, listen to me, Clipper,

all you gotta do

is keep your mouth shut,

leave me to the thinking.

You wanna get us both in jam?

It ain't mine.

It's the one I use in

the show to sh**t Harmon with.

- You do what?

- I sh**t him.

Look at the rods full of blanks.

Oh, that's right, you told me.

Well, now, ain't that

just too sweet for anything?

I'm surprised at you, Clipper.

You ought to know you can't

sh**t nobody with blanks.

Butch, you don't want me

to really sh**t...

And when it's all over,

it's just an accident, get it?

All part of the show.

I won't. I won't I tell you.

Now, you gonna do just

like I tell you?

Or I'm gonna turn you

over to the cops

and tell 'em you're

the blonde bandit.

I won't. And you

can't make me do it.

No? Well, how'd you like to sit

in one of them little cages

lookin' out through the bars?

And thinkin' about spider

and all the g*ng out

there playing ball and goin'

swimming and all that stuff?

And you working your head off

pounding pegs under shoes

in a dirty, rotten cell.

With bum grub

and god standing over your...

Stop it, stop it will you, Butch?

I knew you wasn't yellow, kid.

Here.

Now don't forget your part.

[orchestral music]

[trumpet playing]

My Lord, the people

who aren't sent

refuse carrying on

with this peasant girl, Sonja.

Oh, tat-tat, where is Sonja,

My beautiful passion flower?

Ah-ha! Even now she approaches

in yon chariot.

[orchestral music]

Light lamps..

[audience laughing]

[music continues]

[applause]

[audience laughing]

[orchestral music]

My-my beloved, I am here.

Your little rose bud,

your little orchid.

Your little dandelion.

A-ah, my beautiful..

My beautiful..

...sunflower.

You are looking betterer

than you have looketh

for months and months

and months and months.

- I bring thee a present.

- Yeah?

- Didst thou loseth it?

- It got stucketh somewhere.

Could I helpeth thee?

- It's here.

- Ah.

- Elixer of love.

- A-ah!

[choking]

Not bad.

Be gone, rabble.

Be gone.

[orchestral music]

Oh, my darling,

ah, my Lily of the Valley.

Ah, my rose, oh, I love you.

I shall never leave you

and you shall never leave me,

we will always be sweethearts.

I promise you from

the bottom of my heart

that if you wont leave me, I'll

be true to you. Oh, kiss me.

I've asked you to kiss me.

Will you please come

with me to my throne?

Oh, gracious me,

come my love, over here.

Ouch! Over here, over here.

Ah, in my arms, how I love thee.

I..

Sonja, my darling,

would you do something for me?

- Anything, my love.

- Anything, Sonja, dear?

Anything.

Would you mind giving me

back my whiskers.

[clearing throat]

That's your cue, now go on

and don't forget your line.

Ah-ha!

Olaf, the terrible.

All is lost.

Sonja, you shall not live

to marry the Duke

and plunge our country

into darkness.

Prepare to die.

Not while I have my trusty blade.

We have been tricked.

All is lost.

Farewell, Sonja.

Prepare to die.

No.

[softly]

Clip, sh**t.

- I can't do it.

- You gotta sh**t.

[orchestral music]

I can't do it. I won't do it.

You got to. You'll spoil

the show, I gotta die.

I can't do it I tell you.

- You gotta sh**t.

- Come on, sh**t.

- I can't I tell you.

- You gotta sh**t.

I can't sh**t you.

I won't do it.

He's got a stage fright.

Take the g*n.

My love for Sonja,

has changed to hate.

So I will sh**t her.

Prepare thee to die.

Stop.

[orchestral music]

Oh, Sonja, Sonja, Sonja,

I didn't mean to k*ll you.

Oh, wait, I didn't mean

to k*ll you, Sonja.

Oh, take care of

our little daughter, Myrtle.

Myrtle? Oh, yeah I remember her.

My lily, my lilac, my lollipop,

I have k*lled thou.

[audience applauding]

Oh.

Oh. I left my costume

for the second act

in the kids locker room.

- Oh, you did?

- It's that modern dress.

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

[applause]

And now, the next scene

in our little opera

takes place on a rainy day

in Pittsburgh..

...twenty years later.

And Mr. Harmon, who played Sonja

the beautiful Gypsy girl,

in the first act

has now become a mother.

So, in the second act..

...Mr. Harmon will portray

a very, very difficult role.

He will play his own daughter.

And, at this time, I want to to

thank each and everyone of you

for being so attentive.

And especially,

for not throwing anything.

Hmm.

[clearing throat]

Life is like that.

Tasty though.

That isn't it.

Well, it'll do.

- Well?

- I couldn't, Butch, I..

- I just couldn't.

- That's alright.

Doing the second act, are you?

- No, but, but listen...

- Now wait a minute.

I got a great tip in doing

the show a swell job, see?

Get your stuff,

meet me in the alley.

I'll be waiting in the car.

Hurry up.

Hey, listen, Butch. I don't

wanna do no more of that stuff.

Please, Butch.

You be there in five minutes

or I'll come and get you.

But, Butch. Please don't..

Never mind, darling.

Don't you care.

You got stage fright.

I know how it is.

No, I didn't, Margie.

I tried to k*ll him.

I wanted to k*ll him.

When the time came,

I-I just couldn't.

Well, honey, what do you mean?

There was b*ll*ts in that g*n.

Real b*ll*ts.

Butch said if I didn't k*ll Harmon

he'd go to the cops and tell 'em

I was the blonde bandit.

You?

You're the blonde bandit?

Why, honey, you're crazy. You

don't know what you're saying.

Oh, I know what I'm saying,

alright.

Oh.

Butch is gonna squeal.

Maybe he's doing it now!

I gotta get outa here.

You can't. You gonna stay

right here with me.

I won't, I tell ya.

Let me go.

Clipper!

What's the matter?

Oh, Harmon, quick.

Something terrible has happened.

Clipper is running away.

Get him, quick.

Come on. Clipper, get in here.

Mr. Clipper, you didn't sh**t

Harmon like you said you would.

If I had that Harmon guy

here now, I'd pump him

so full of holes he'd look

like a sieve.

But I'm a good guy.

I'm gonna let you do it.

We're going to Harmon's house

now, and we gonna wait for him.

When he comes in,

you're gonna plug him.

Get me?

Hey no monkey business now,

clipper, or I'll give it to you!

Come in. I wanna talk to you.

Didn't I just put you in Butch's

car in that dames outfit?

No.

Well, I put somebody in there.

Listen, you little rat.

- Who's got that outfit?

- I don't know.

What's the matter?

Butch has gone over to Harmon's

place, he's taken the wrong guy.

We gotta get over to Harmons

quick.

- Come on, let's go.

- Let's get over there.

Listen, Lefty, you've got the

wrong idea about this thing.

Oh, shut up,

you little double cross.

- Spike, come here.

- What do you want?

- Stay and watch him.

- Alright.

Here.

Keep your eyes glued

on that door there.

When Harmon comes in,

aim straight for his heart

and pull that trigger.

[g*nsh*t]

Stop, you..

I changed my mind, clipper.

I think I'll sh**t Harmon myself.

Oh, no.

I'd be glad to sh**t him for ya.

Ah, Come on.

I'll sh**t him.

No, I better do it.

I know him better than you do.

Ah, no. I think it's better

if I sh**t, come on.

Give me that gat.

Now, Mr. Harmon, I got you

right where I want you.

And you're not even going to get

a chance to say your prayers.

[g*n shot]

Don't sh**t anymore, Mr. Harmon.

I was..

I was only fooling.

Put up your hands.

Don't make a false move.

[g*n shot]

I was only practicing then.

The next time I'll sh**t to k*ll.

Get back there.

Stay there too.

'cause I'm not fooling.

I'll sh**t.

- Get him, you guys. Come on in.

- Yeah.

[crowd clamouring]

Hey g*ng, g*ng.

Come here.

Something's happened to

Mr. Harmon and he is in trouble.

Oh, we know that you don't like

Mr. Harmon..

Oh, you gotta believe me.

Mr-Mr. Harmon is being

put in the spot.

Butch and his g*ng

are gonna k*ll him.

[crowd clamouring]

Mr. Harmon's a regular guy.

He built this gym for us.

So we wouldn't grow up to be

like Butch and Lefty.

And now they're putting

a finger on him.

We-we've gotta save him!

Let' s get him!

Come on guys, let's go!

Come on!

[Children shouting]

[whistling]

- It's a signal.

- Let's go. Come on!

[whistling]

g*ng whistle. Let's go!

[men shouting]

[banging on door]

[children shouting]

All together, go!

[men shouting]

'Go get him, guys, go get him.'

[children shouting]

Close that door.

Turn on that light.

'Come on,

look behind here, quick.'

'Turn on that light.

Didn't I say that once before?'

'Come on.'

- 'Look here.'

- 'Come on, you guys.'

Hey, there he is!

Gather around him you guys.

Don't let him get away.

Come on now, I got you.

Where you'll get..

[children shouting]

Hey, wait a minute.

Holy Mackerel, what's that?

[children shouting]

Ouch. Ah!

[screaming]

Get ready, you guys.

Here comes another guy.

We gotta get him.

[children shouting]

'There goes Butch!'

Oh! Oh-h, Margie!

O-oh, Harmon.