01x19 - Faculty Lounge/Personal Assistant

[bunniefuu]

[opening theme plays]

♪ Kiff! ♪

♪ Kiff! Kiff! ♪

♪ Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! ♪

♪ Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! ♪

♪ Kiff, Kiff, Kiff ♪

♪ Kiff, Kiff, Kiff, Kiff ♪

♪ Kiff, Kiff
Kiff, Kiff, Kiff ♪

♪ Kiff! ♪

[chuckles]

[both laughing]

[woman] Brought to you
by Toad Bucket.

It's exactly
what it sounds like.

[school bell rings]

[groans]

Oh, mysterious
faculty lounge,

what wonders do you hold?

I mean, a place
for the teachers to lounge?

[sighs]
It must be

an academic wonderland
in there...

Oh, wow!

[Prince] ...fascinating
that I wouldn't share

with my students,
they don't deserve it.

Eye in the sky tells us
of a discovered galaxy.

Where are we
on that incredible pendulum?

You gumdrops trying to see
inside the lounge again?

Ha! Good luck, no student
has ever seen inside.

I'm going in.

Yes?

We, uh,

have a question
for Miss Deer Teacher.

- Is she in there?
- Afraid not. Nobody is.

Whoa! I'm supposed
to be in the cafeteria

sampling new tater tots.

Kiff. Barry.

[groans]

[gasps] There! There!

The door's still open.

Cover me!

[gasps]

[clock ticking]

Mmm. This place is a dump.

"Teacher coming!!"

"Hide!!!" [gasps]

Oh, no!

Hey, what do you think
you're doing?

No students allowed!

I should expel you
just for looking in there.

Whoa!
Sorry, Mr. RiPeppa!

I didn't see anything!

[grunting in pain]

Go so many obstacles
in this hallway.

[suspenseful music plays]

[deeply sighs]

[joints popping]

Alone in the lounge at last!

[chuckles heartily]

[happily groans]
Whoa!

That feels good.

I wonder what's for lunch today,

eh?

Hmm.

"Property of Miss Deer Teacher."

Heh. We'll see about that.

Ooh. Hello.

[chomping food loudly]

That was a scrumptious sandwich.

No part of me feels
complicated about this.

Just got to get rid
of the evidence. Ooh...

I just witnessed a theft
of a delicious sandwich

by a remorseless monster
who's in charge

of an entire class of children!

I've got to get out of here.

Barry, find a way

to get Mr. RiPeppa

out of lounge.

Bad news, RiPeppa,
a student just told me

your car is being toad.

- What?
- Yeah.

Toads all over it.

Oh, no!
I gotta deal with this.

I will assist.

Wait. You know what?

They can have it.
I've been trying

to get rid
of that clunker for years.

Heh. I want to live!

The man wants to live.

Aw, man!

Now, what was that?

Hey, you ever think

the couch would look better
over there?

I have.

Yikesee. Ooh! Ahh!

Nothing under the couch.

Why would you say that?

Usually you see things

that end up
under there--

wrappers,
tennis ba*ls and whatnot.

Oh, yeah, the couch
is incredible over here.

Finally, a good location
for the couch!

Hey, let's see how many teachers
we could fit on this thing, eh?

Hey, Helen,
Miss Deer Teacher,

Secretary Prince! Sweepy!
Get in here!

- You gotta see this.
- [all clamoring]

[groans]
No...

Stunning.

Oh, everyone grab a seat.

Hope we all fit.

What fun.

[Miss Deer Teacher laughs]

[ominous theme playing]

[all exclaim]

[clamoring]

Pushing this couch
to the limit.

Kind of hot with us
all crammed on the couch.

Should I turn on the fan?

- [Helen] Oh, yes!
- [RiPeppa] Crank her up.

[RiPeppa]
Let her rip.

[groans]

[Miss Deer Teacher]
Coffee's ready!

Grab your mugs.

Mine's in front,
as it should be.

Oh, mine is
also in the front.

- [Secretary Prince] And mine.
- [Miss Deer Teacher] And mine.

- [Sweepy] And mine.
- [RiPeppa] And mine.

Oh, what a magical day
we're having!

[panting]

[cell phone buzzing]

"Barry. Forget toads.
It didn't work.

Create a diversion
on playground!"

You got it, Kiff.

It didn't work!
You guys can get outta here!

[ribbits]

Ooh, I'm getting
kind of hungry.

Maybe I'll grab
my sandwich from the fridge.

[clearing throat loudly]

[spoon swirling in cup]

[slurps]

[exhales]

[slurps]

[tape stretching]

[slams]

[shakers shifting]

What is happening?

[paper tearing]

[dings]

Oh, boy, heh,

have I had a day!

♪ 10 a.m. this morning
I was teaching up a storm ♪

♪ And I thought
It was going well ♪

♪ But the whole class
Started yawning ♪

♪ Today I wore
My brand new sneaks ♪

♪ I think they're neat
But this kid asked me ♪

♪ Are those bananas
On your feet? ♪

I guess 'cause
They're yellow? Ugh.

♪ Teaching is hard
But we love it anyway ♪

♪ Tell us about your day! Hey!
Tell us about your day! ♪

♪ Graded papers through lunch
Haven't eaten a bunch ♪

♪ I just want my sammy
Am I asking for too much? ♪

♪ I was taking a nap
Dreaming I was on a beach ♪

♪ But my students woke me up
They wanted me to teach ♪

♪ There was a food fight
In the cafeteria at noon ♪

♪ I took a look and said
I'm gonna need a bigger broom ♪

♪ I spent
The morning scrubbing ♪

♪ Ugh, what a chore ♪

♪ Some prankster wrote an F ♪

♪ Before the "ART"
On my door ♪

You see what
I'm dealing with here?

"F" and then "ART".
So it spells fart.

♪ Teaching is hard
But we love it anyway ♪

♪ We'll make it
Through the day! Hey! ♪

♪ We'll make it
Through the day! ♪

I've been on my feet
all day.

Help! Oh, help!

Darryn, get out of here, man.

What are you doing?

Hey, a kid's tangled up
in the swings.

[slurps]

[Barry, in distance]
Help!

[gasps] Now's my chance.

Thank you, Barry.

[tense music plays]

Hey, did you do
the song without me?

Is it because last time
I rhymed pencil with pencil?

Huh? They're looking away.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Uh...

[ribbits]

Help!

Ah, not to worry.

I shall extract the child

from the swings.

Didn't know that was a thing.

But, uh, thank you, Sweepy.

Uh, well, all,
almost end of the day.

When that bell rings,
I can split.

- [school bell rings]
- Yes!

Hey, someone
ate my sandwich!

That's the fourth time
this month.

What am I going
to eat now, huh?

An apple?
I can't eat another apple.

I just can't!

Oh, no,
I always give her apples.

This will not stand.
No one leaves this room

until we identify
the bread and meat thief.

[ominous music plays]

[all groan]

Lock the door, Secretary Prince.

We'll stay here all night
if we have to.

Unfortunate, as I was supposed
to go to the airport

to retrieve
our new guidance counselor,

Ms. Foodcake,
who no one has met yet.

What? You don't even know
what she looks like?

No one does.
She had a phone interview.

I was just gonna hold up
this card with her name on it.

I'm really proud of it.
I spent all night making it.

I used three colors.

[tense music plays]

- [all chattering then stop]
- Greetings.

I'm Ms. Foodcake.

[all extending greetings]

My flight landed early,
so I took a taxi.

Didn't want to be a bother.

Ha! Splendid.

And I see you've already
familiarized yourself

with the faculty
lounge closet.

Perfect.

Yes. Excellent closet.

Now, I think I ought
to head to my, uh, hotel

and get some sleep.

Of course,
Ms. Foodcake.

Now, where were we?

[overlapping dialogue]

Just leave the faculty lounge, Kiff.

Uh, this is
tearing us apart.

This is breaking my heart, people.

Oh, there's no use.
I say we give up.

[overlapping dialogue]

A lounge divided
will not stand!

- [Kiff] Everyone, please!
- [teachers quiet]

You all work so hard.

It's not worth it
to be stuck here all night.

So I'm sure the sandwich thief
will confess

because he understands

how precious your time is.

Oh, won't you help us
solve this,

Mr. Ri...

Peppa?

Okay, RiPeppa,
she's obviously saying

that you took the sandwich.

Heck, part of the rapper
is stuck to your shoe.

[RiPeppa] Oh...

RiPeppa, how could you?

Uh, how's that kid
in the swing, by the way?

There will be consequences, RiPeppa.

Thank you, Ms. Foodcake.

I can tell you will be an asset
to Table Town School.

You have brought this

upon yourself, RiPeppa.

[ominous music plays]

[Sweepy grunting]

I'll go get
the World Encyclopedia.

[Sweepy groans]

Hey, Barry.

Who are you?

Oh, hey, Kiff.

Let's get you
out of there.

Oh, Barry, I've had
a day and a half.

[Barry yelps]

I learned so much
about teachers!

They're--
They're people, Barry!

People with hopes,
dreams and fears!

Just like us.
Let's go home.

We gotta make
Miss Deer Teacher a sandwich.

Come on.
I'll make you one, too.

[Barry]
Uh, all right.

Oh. Heh. All right.

- [frog ribbits]
- [Barry] Gimme your shoulder.

Thank you.

[chime sounds over P.A.]

Hello?
Are you Principal Secretary?

No? Oh.

Hi. Are you
Principal Secret--?

- Okay, no.
- [frog ribbits]

Um... Uh, sorry.

- Hello?
- [ribbits]