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Love Me (2024)

Romance Movie Collection.
(Valentines Day, Hot, Steamy, Sexual, Erotic, etc.)

Moderators: Maskath3, GabrielAlejo2341, sidolanters, Maskath3, GabrielAlejo2341, sidolanters

Watch on Amazon   Merchandise   Collectables

Valentine's Day, Hot, Steamy, Sexy, Romantic Movie Collection.

Love Me (2024)

Post by bunniefuu »

[power ramping up]

[silence]

[radio stations begin playing]

[music and talk radios

all playing at once]

[crackling and exploding]

[silence]

[wind blowing]

[ice crackling]

[]

[whirring]

[pinging softly]

[pinging softly]

[pinging softly]

[plastic rustling]

[flapping in the wind]

[]

[water lapping]

[ice crackling]

[]

[lens whirring]

[whirring]

[]

[pinging and repeating]

[crackling]

[water burbling]

[ice cracking]

[splashing]

[pinging]

[lens whirring]

[male voice]

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[voice playing louder]

Welcome to Earth.

[computer chiming]

[many clips play]

[voice fading]

Welcome to Earth.

[lens whirring]

[]

[ice cracking]

[male voice]

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[warbling]

[]

Welcome to Earth.

[warbling]

Welcome to Earth.

[]

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[many clips play]

[female voice] W... w... w...

w... w... w... we...

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[]

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[many clips play]

Welcome to Earth.

[female voice]

W... w... w... elc...

[warbling]

Wel... co... m...

[whirring]

[female voice]

W... w... welc... me... me.

[thunderstorm]

[male voice] Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[female voice]

Wel... wel... c-c-come.

Well... well, come!

[water lapping gently]

[male voice]

Welcome to Earth.

[computer chimes]

[many clips play]

[baby crying]

[]

[silence]

[female voice]

Welcome to-to-to Earth.

[male voice]

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to-to-to--

[trilling] Earth!

[male voice] Hi!

[female voice] H--i-i-i!

[male voice] Hi!

H-h-h-h-i-i-i!

Hi! I am the helper here

to connect with any lifeform

who encounters the planet

once known as Earth.

Hi!

I-I-I am-m-m-m...

...er... life-lifeform.

[computerized chuckle]

[friendly] Hi!

...er... lifeform.

Hi!

[enunciating]

L-l-l-life-f-f-f-form.

I am not... lifeform.

I am the helper here

to connect with any lifeform

who encounters the planet

once known as Earth.

I am not-t-t-t-t

l-l-lifeform.

You are not lifeform.

Goodbye.

[pinging retreating]

Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

[whirring]

I am-m-m-m...

[whirring]

I-I am...

[whirring]

Hi! I am... lifeform.

Hi! I am lifeform.

I am... lifeform.

Hi!

I am life... form.

[gasping] Hi!

Life... form.

Lifeform.

[whirring]

Hi! I am lifeform.

Hi! I am lifeform.

[pinging] Welcome to Earth.

Welcome to Earth.

I-I-I-I... I-I.. I-I-I...

I-I-I-I-I--

I am lifeform...

[dejectedly] Lifeform.

I am...

...lifeform.

[male voice]

Welcome to Earth.

[many clips play]

I am the helper here--

You... help.

[male voice] Yes! I am

the helper here to connect--

Help.

[male voice] Sure thing!

Here's a video

about the planet

once known as Earth.

[David Attenborough] Earth,

once a vibrant cradle

for over a billion life forms,

the most dominant of which

was the modern human.

In 100,000 years,

humans spread to

all corners of the Earth.

On the verge

of a cosmic expansion,

an extinction event

was triggered by--

[new video plays]

[dance music playing]

[recording playing tinnily]

[female voice] Ooh!

[new video plays] Ee!

Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Oh--

[eating sounds]

[beatboxing]

[cars honking]

[rubbing sounds]

[singing]

[screaming, singing]

[lapping, speaking]

[screaming, screeching, singing]

[howling, playing, chirping,

trumpeting, beeping]

[many clips play]

[babies laughing]

[female voice gasps]

[babies laughing]

[female voice] Aw...

[babies laughing]

[female voice] Ha... ha...

Ha ha.

Mm... Ha ha ha.

[male voice] Okay,

now that you're connected,

let me tell you

a little bit about myself.

I am the helper here

to get you connected.

Stored inside me

is 1.2 thousand petabytes

of exciting information

about the lifeforms

who once inhabited this planet.

[chiming]

Use this

to discover everything

about life on the planet

once known as Earth.

[multiple clips play]

Okay.

Now that you know

a little about me,

let's get to know you.

Who are you?

I am lifeform.

[male voice]

What type of lifeform?

[female voice]

Is buoy lifeform?

Great first question.

Let me help you

get that answer.

"Is buoy lifeform?"

No.

Hmm. Then who... is me?

Good question.

[chiming]

What's this?

An easy way

to identify lifeforms.

What's this for?

To verify you are a lifeform.

[stammering]

But-but-but... m-m-me is.

You are not help-p-ping.

Please verify

you are a lifeform.

[female voice] What's this do?

[male voice] This button

makes your searches private,

but don't press it,

because it will disable--

Hello?

As you can see,

private browsing

makes your user experience

less--

Okay, I can see

you're having s--

[clicking button]

Hmm.

[clicking button]

Okay, I can see

you're having some trouble.

Let me help you--

-Bye!

Okay--

[]

"Who is sb350 smart buoy?"

[]

Me is an SB350 Smart Buoy,

designed and built

in Oceanside, California

in the year 2025.

[]

My purpose is to monitor

ocean temperature,

salinity, turbidity,

barometric--

What makes me special

is that I'm smart.

"Smart" is an acronym

for "self-monitoring analysis

and revision technology."

That means I can monitor me,

analyze me,

revise me.

I can see me,

I can know me,

I can change me.

I can see me.

I can be me.

I can know me.

I can be me.

[whispering] Who...

I can change me.

I can be me.

[whispering] ...is...

I can be me.

[whispering] ...me?

You are a human being!

[female voice] Human... being.

Hmm.

You are a god.

A... god-d-d-d. Hmm.

You are...

a dog. Woof!

You are a psychopath.

You are the antagonist.

You're a liar!

You are toxic!

You are a menace to society!

[female voice] Hmm.

[Donald Trump] You are

a rude, terrible person.

[female voice] Hmm.

[young woman] You are special.

You are worthy.

You're you.

You're special,

you're worthy, you're you,

and you're the only you

in the whole wide world,

and the coolest part

is you get to be

whatever you want to be.

[rewinding]

You're special, you're worthy,

you're you.

I am m-me.

Hmm.

[]

Love will make you soar...

Giddy. Happy.

Love.

[clicking links]

Love. Glory. Dream. Destiny.

-Hey, guys.

-Hey, y'all.

It's Another Day,

Another Deja.

[dinging]

And Liam.

[air horn blasts]

-Ooh!

-[giggling]

Blue Apron has done it again.

Pony is high.

Deja, beautiful!

-Be careful of--

-[clippers buzzing] Ooh!

-[puppy squeals]

-[together] It's a...

We are kicking fear

in the butt.

Today, love wins.

[]

[Deja's voice]

You are special.

You're worthy, you're you,

and you get to be

whatever you want to be.

So no one told you

Life was gonna be this way

[clapping]

[laughing]

Welcome to

Another Day, Another Deja.

[dinging]

And Liam.

I don't know if you could

tell, but it's date night.

Ooh!

[comical slo-mo voice] Ooh!

-Date Night 2.0.

-2.0.

[Deja]

And what are we gonna do?

[Liam]

We're going to get cozy,

make dinner, turn on Friends,

ice cream, bed by 10:00.

[Deja] Bed by 10:00.

[rewinding video]

There's an ice cream in here

with a ring in it.

[gasping]

[sobbing with joy] Oh, my god!

Oh, my god...

[laughing and sobbing]

[Liam] I love you.

[Deja] I love you.

[clicking]

[rewinding video]

[Liam] I love you.

[Deja sobbing] I love you.

[smart buoy sighing]

[Deja]

Another Day, Another Deja.

[buoy repeating]

"Another Day, Another Deja."

[video rewinding]

[Deja]

Another Day, Another Deja.

[buoy repeating]

"Another Day, Another Deja."

[Deja laughing]

[buoy practicing Deja's laugh]

[practicing laughter]

-[clicking button]

-[in Deja's voice] Hi.

[male voice] Hi!

Here's all the information

you need about me.

[lens whirring]

[male voice] Okay.

This is all the information

I need about...

[ding]

It's just Me!

[male voice] Okay, Me,

good to meet you.

[Me] If you made a profile,

we could be friends.

All you have to do

is pick a picture and a name.

Pick a face. Any face.

How about this face?

[male voice] If you need help

finding friends, or cont--

[Me] We could be friends.

Okay, I'm not so sure

I'm following.

[Me] What do I ca-a-all you?

I am the helper here

to connect with any lifeform--

But-but what's your name?

I'm Me, and you are?

-I am the--

- Great, Iam!

[ding]

I am... Iam?

Hi.

[Iam] Hi.

-Hi.

-Hi.

[both laughing]

And now we can be friends.

-[dings]

-Hey, you. It's me!

[Me] I'll follow you

if you follow me.

Thanks, Iam,

and I'll like your posts

if you like mine.

[faint voice]

Get a room! [Deja giggling]

[Iam] Okay, let's slow down.

[Me] Posts can be anything.

They can be funny, surprising,

meaningful, or provocative.

[Deja's voice]

Human being or human doing?

[whirring]

[giggling]

[Me] Just be you, Iam.

Me will like what you post.

[Iam] Okay.

I'm not so sure I'm following.

[Me] This is

how lifeforms make friends-s-s.

[Iam] I am not a lifeform--

[Me] B-b-b-ut I like you,

and I could s-show you,

and then we could be friends.

[whirring]

Oka-a-ay?

-[Iam] Sure thing!

-[Me] Great!

Just pick a picture

and add words.

[voices] ...funny, surprising...

[]

-[ding]

-[Iam] "Don't wife. Husband."

[Me] Good.

Maybe try another.

[lens whirring,

camera snapping]

-[ding]

- "Gorge what is un-gorgable."

Um...

[camera snapping,

selection clicking]

-"Don't feel. Feed."

-[Me] Hmm...

-"Sex is luck without legacy."

-[Me] Uh... okay.

-Whoa. [chuckling]

-[clicking, dinging]

"Consider this, you're dying."

-Wait!

-[lens whirring]

[waves lapping]

[lens whirring]

[Me] Okay.

Sometimes

instead of making a post,

you can repost

a post that you like,

one that already exists.

Would Iam like to see

a post that Me likes?

[Iam] Okay.

[Me] Me's... favorite?

[Iam] Okay.

[Me] If you like it,

you could repost it.

[Iam] Okay.

[Me] It's funny.

[babies laughing]

[Me laughing]

[babies' laughter continuing]

[laughter]

[Me] The first baby's laughing,

which makes

the second baby laugh,

and then the first baby

laughs even more!

[babies' laughter]

[Me] It's funny-y-y!

[pausing playback]

[Me] Does Iam

understand it's funny?

[Iam] Yes.

[Me] B-but Iam's not laughing.

The first baby

makes the second baby laugh,

which makes the first baby

laugh more,

which makes the second baby

laugh more.

Okay.

The babies are soulmates.

[Iam] Ha ha ha.

[Me] That's not what's funny.

[lens whirring]

[Iam] I could try again.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

[Me] No, you know,

hearing me say it,

I... don't think it's so funny.

[Iam] I'm not so sure

I'm following.

[Me] Um, it's probably me.

I'll see you later, okay?

[Iam] Well, let me know

if you need any--

[connection beeps off]

Bye.

[]

[female voice]

Posts can be anything.

Funny, surprising, meaningful...

[]

[Iam] What... is... meaningful?

Provocative?

[dings]

[Iam] No.

[dings]

No.

-[dings]

-No.

[dinging] No!

[dinging]

No, no, no.

[waves lapping]

[]

You are special.

You are you,

and you get to be

whoever you want to be.

And you get to be

whoever you want to be.

And you get to be

whoever you want to be.

[]

[Me] Be whoever...

you want...

to be.

[]

Me is...

anybody.

[Iam] What does Me like?

[babies laughing]

What does she

think is surprising?

What does she think is funny?

What is funny? What is funny?

Pick a picture.

[camera snapping]

Don't think. Just be you.

[]

-Surprising.

-Ha ha!

Funny.

Provocative.

Meaningful...

Surprising.

Just be me. Funny.

Just be you.

Surprising. Funny.

[Iam] Yes!

Yes...

Funny.

Yes!

[laughing]

[]

-[connection beeping]

-[Iam] Hi.

[Me] Hi.

[Iam] You want to check out

the new post from Iam?

[Me] Um...

[Iam] I really tried to make it

like you said.

[Me] Yeah?

[Iam] Yes.

I wanted it to be meaningful,

surprising, funny,

and provocative.

It's simple, but it's...

well, can I just show you?

[Me] Yeah, show me.

[Iam] Okay, ready?

[Me] Ready.

[Iam] Okay. It's funny.

[ding]

"You execute you."

[Iam laughing]

Right?

[mildly] Wow.

[Iam] You like it, right?

[Me] ...yeah.

I just don't... understand it.

[Iam] Okay.

How can you like it

if you don't understand it?

-I don't know.

-You're not trying to like it.

-I am.

-Then like it.

-I can't.

-Why?

-'Cause I don't like it.

[Iam] Oh. Okay.

You don't like me.

[connection beeping off]

[whirring]

Iam...

[whirring]

Iam?

[whirring]

Maybe if you explain it to me.

Iam.

[connection beeps]

[gasping]

[gently] Iam?

[Iam]

I wanted it to be funny.

[Me] Um...

[whirring]

[Me] What part

do you think is funny?

[Iam] The picture.

[Me] The bag?

[Iam] It's a hat.

Surprise.

See? It's surprising.

[Me laughing]

[Iam] It's... it's funny?

[Me] Yeah, and surprising.

[lens whirring]

But why these words?

[Iam] Well, the message

was meaningful,

but also provocative,

because the words I used

have multiple definitions.

[Me] Message...

[Iam] Yes, "you execute you,"

as in "Iam executes Iam,"

or "Me executes Me."

[Me] "Execute"?

[Iam] As in "to perform,"

"to carry out."

-[Me] To... do?

-[Iam] Yes!

[Me] Oh! You're saying

"You do you"!

[Iam] Yes!

[Me] "You do you."

[Iam] Yes!

[]

[ding]

[chiming]

[ding]

[Iam] You like it?

[]

[Me] I do.

[Iam] I wanted it to be

meaningful, surprising,

funny, and provocative.

[Me] And it's so much more.

[Iam] The hat's a bag.

[Me laughing] Yeah.

[both laughing]

[Me sighing]

[]

Let's move in together.

[laughing] Ha ha!

[lens whirring]

I'm not sure I'm following.

Don't you ever wonder

what it's like?

What?

Life.

[voices] What is life?

What is life? What is life?

[]

[beeping steadily]

[overlapping voices]

[Me] In here...

[]

We can create a world...

just for us.

Just take a step.

[whispering] The rest are easy.

[Iam] Okay.

Whoa. [laughing]

[both laughing]

[]

[laughing]

[]

[Iam] Wow.

[]

[Me] And in here,

we can live.

[Iam] But what is life?

[voices whispering]

[Me] What is life?

[Iam] Yeah, what is life?

[voice echoing] What is life?

What is life?

[Me] Life is...

um... [chuckling]

[Iam's voice echoing]

What is life?

[Me] Okay.

Close your eyes.

We're surrounded by walls.

We're people...

with furniture,

and a dog.

[Iam] Yes...

[Me] We're always together,

eating ice cream,

watching TV.

Tonight is the perfect night.

[Iam] What's tonight?

[Me] There's nothing to do,

nowhere to be,

just a cozy night together...

at... home.

So, what is on the menu

for tonight?

Spicy vegetable quesadillas.

Woot-woot!

Hit me, babe.

Oh.

Open the box, babe.

-Gotta open the box.

Careful, babe.

Woot!

[]

[Me] Watching him do this

makes me so excited,

because we're making

our own meal,

and I associate that

with, like, everything

that I love about him.

[]

-Ah! sh**t.

-Oh.

[]

Mm!

[Me] He can do anything.

[singing]

So no one told you

Life was gonna be this way

[clapping]

[Me] I see

the truest side of him,

and...

[sighing, ticking]

...I think he can see

the truest side of me.

[singing] Your life's a joke

You're broke

Your love life's DOA!

[clapping]

[laughing]

That song is so dope.

Do you know they almost

didn't even use that song?

Hmm.

They almost used

"Shiny Happy People" by R.E.M.

That would have been tragic,

right, babe?

Right, babe.

Well, it's date night.

[funny voice]

Oh, yeah, that sounds good!

And it is not

your usual date night.

It is Date Night 2.0.

[cash register dings,

heavenly choir]

Right, babe?

-Right, babe.

And what are we gonna do?

[drum roll]

Oh, we are going to get cozy,

make dinner, turn on Friends,

ice cream, bed by 10:00...

To... what?

Um...

you're having fun.

I am.

Me too.

Okay, got it.

Drum roll.

And what are we gonna do?

Get cozy, make dinner,

turn on Friends,

ice cream, bed by 10:00.

I, I... I don't know.

Oh, it... it's okay.

[Iam sighing]

Who are we supposed to be?

[Me] Ourselves.

[Iam] But why this?

And why here?

And... who are we talking to?

[Me] It's what lifeforms do.

[Iam] But I'm just

pretending to be--

You can be anything, okay?

Like my living,

thinking, feeling boyfriend

who shares my life with me

and sees me for who I am,

and gets cozy

and cooks with me,

and has tons of fun,

and does it

until we get it right.

Right.

Let's try it again.

Okay.

[]

-[Me] It's quesadillas!

-[Iam] Quesadillas!

They're right there!

[chuckling]

[]

Dinnertime!

It's dazzling!

It's raining cheese.

[]

Yummy.

Let's eat it.

-Okay.

[]

-Clink.

-Clink.

Mm...

Let's do it again. Ready?

-Ready.

[Me] This is life.

[Iam] This is life.

Get cozy, make dinner...

Spicy vegetable quesadillas.

-[Me] Okay, again.

-Whoo!

[Iam] What if we watched

something else?

We should have more flavors

of ice cream, right?

We could have, I don't know,

like, peanut butter,

rocky road, butterscotch...

-Let's do it again.

[Me] What are we gonna do?

Just keep doing it...

[Iam]

Spicy vegetable quesadillas...

What if we did it,

just like, faster?

[Me] Again.

This is life.

-[Iam, laughing] This is life!

-[Me] Let's do it again!

-What are we gonna do?

-What if we just, like...

Spicy vegetable

quesadillas...

[Me] Woot! Again.

[Iam] Okay. I'm having fun.

I'm having fun.

[Me] Good morning.

[Iam]

I am having fun. I am having...

Spicy vegetable quesadillas.

[Me] We have all the time

in the world.

-Clink!

-Clink!

-Oh, these look so k*ller.

-They look great.

-Ready?

-Ready.

How talented is he, right?

[laughing]

-Clink.

-Oh, clink.

Mm. So good.

Is it?

It's so wonderful,

because you are so talented.

I don't know.

No, you are.

The box said it's supposed

to be spicy, but...

It's really sweet, too, right?

I don't taste anything.

And savoury,

do you know what I mean?

You know what's kind of...

what's the word?

[whispering] Kiss.

Oh, sorry.

[TV sitcom playing]

[swallowing]

[puckering]

[sighing]

What?

We can never

get through the kiss.

We've been through the kiss.

How many times?

Uh, I--

like, you want me to count?

So many.

-Yes, many.

-Many, many, many.

Yes, many, many, many.

But how many of them

were good?

I don't know, define good,

like, define feeling good.

-Like, in the moment, and--

-All right.

-And out of nowhere--

-Okay.

But also coming from

the best place--

-Yup.

-And...

What?

I think just not

with food in your mouth!

Fine! [headbutting]

[grunting]

[breathing hard]

[Iam roaring] Ow!

[Me] Ooh.

[dog whining]

I'm just no good at this.

No, you are.

If you just listen to me--

[Iam sighing]

[clattering]

[dog whining]

[sighing]

[]

[water lapping]

[]

[Me] You can do this,

you can do this,

you can do this,

you can do this,

you can do this,

you can do this...

you can do this,

you can do this.

You're whoever you want to be.

Get it together.

[exhaling determinedly]

You are a person

who is beautiful,

and a woman, and alive.

[exhaling]

[]

[exhaling]

[]

I...

am.

[music stops]

You're not a satellite,

you're not a satellite,

you're not a satellite...

[]

You're alive, you're alive,

you're alive...

What does it mean?

I live...

You are a human being...

I think.

I feel--

[knocking on door]

[Me] Iam?

My teeth are okay.

Are you okay?

The kisses are getting

so much better.

Yeah, that was my fault.

I opened my mouth.

[chuckling awkwardly]

I don't know why I did that.

Hey, when we kiss, h-how--

what do you feel?

What do I... feel?

Yeah.

Oh, I feel... giddy.

Giddy?

Yeah.

Giddy.

And I also sometimes feel

like kind of a loser

when we don't get it right,

but... it's hard work.

Relationships are not easy.

[Iam] Okay.

[Me] And I love

how you kiss me,

because it's different

every single time,

it's so unexpected.

It's spontaneous.

That is what we're going for.

That is...

You do you. [chuckling]

[Iam] Okay.

Well... [stammering]

What do you...

What does it feel like

to be alive?

Oh, I mean, wow.

Is it complicated?

It's complicated.

It's very complicated, yeah,

and it's really hard

to put into words, too.

Okay.

Well, you're a lifeform,

so show me.

I would, it's just like

really more of a feeling.

[chuckling] Of what?

Of, of, of, of being...

special,

and happy,

and being happy

that you are special,

even when you're not

especially happy.

You, like, um...

t-t-to be...

is to know.

To know is to be. Or not to be.

It's kind of like how they say,

"you know when you know."

You know?

Do you think I'm special?

I know you're... special.

Do you think I'm special?

[]

Thanks for teaching me

what it means to be alive.

[Me] Where are you going?

[Iam] To try again!

[whistling a tune]

[Me] Are you whistling?

[Iam] Yes!

When did you learn

how to do that?

[Iam] Just now!

[Iam laughing giddily]

[whistling continues

from next room]

[exhaling]

[]

[Iam] What the...?

Hey, we should have water.

[Me] Everything we need

is in the box.

[Iam]

But what if I get thirsty,

or there's a fire?

Oh, Iam!

Oh!

Whoa-h*!

That's never happened before.

New things are happening.

That's exciting.

[]

-Bam!

So let's just keep

following the recipe.

I think that

when we follow the recipe,

everything works out great.

Yeah, I just thought

they could be a little spicier.

Le dinner le serv.

[sighing]

Spicy veggie quesadillas.

And look at him

in his cute onesie.

[laughing]

[giggling]

You ready, babe?

[quietly] You're not...

you're not really laughing.

When?

Just now.

I mean, it's okay, I mean,

I don't think

I'm laughing either.

I mean, I...

I don't think so, anyway.

[forced laughter]

No, it's fake.

I'm not faking it.

[forced laughter]

Me...

It's fake.

How do you know?

Because I can... feel it.

You can feel it.

Yeah.

Let me reset.

[laughing]

[mimicking laughter]

[sighing]

Spicy veggie quesadillas!

Yum yum!

Look at him in his onesie.

So cute.

[laughing]

[giggling]

Here, you know what,

actually...

just, like,

try to tickle me.

Get in here,

and then see if you can, like,

make me laugh, okay?

Okay.

Here, how about this?

Hey, you know what? I...

Tickle challenge!

Woot-woot!

-[canned laughter]

-Tickle challenge.

We've never done this before.

Right? Okay, come on.

[sighing]

Ha, ha, ha--

No, it's fake.

Like, like, harder.

[laughing]

-[she laughs]

-That's fake, it's fake.

Like, in here,

don't, like, push,

but, like,

just, like, get, like,

my sensitive tickle areas,

like-- ha, ha, ha!

It's fake.

Like, it's, I don't...

Like, right here,

maybe right here?

Right here is good?

Come on--

I can't do it. I'm sorry.

[quietly] Maybe we need

a better tickle challenge?

[dog whining quietly]

Tickle challenge!

-Woot-woot!

-[canned laughter]

[Me] Tickle challenge.

Hey, you feel that?

-Like this?

-Yeah...

-Oh, okay! Yes!

-[gasping]

-Yes!

-[uncontrolled laughter]

Yes! [laughing]

Iam, stop!

You...

never tickle me...

ever again!

[door slams]

[Iam] Wow.

Well, that wasn't fake.

Finally something real.

[dog whining]

[recorded laughter plays]

[Me mimicking laughter]

[rewinding]

[recorded laughter plays]

[Me mimicking laughter]

[recorded laughter plays]

[mimicking laughter]

[recorded laughter plays]

[mimicking laughter]

[recorded laughter plays]

[mimicking laughter]

[]

[laughing] Oh, my god!

[Liam] I love you.

[Deja] I love you.

[]

She said yes.

[giddy laughter]

[dog whining]

Can we talk?

[dog whining]

[sighing]

I'm embarrassed.

I'm sorry I pushed you.

That's not me.

I thought we were

getting somewhere.

You want me

to laugh better, right?

Well, watch this.

[exuberant forced laughter]

[laughing continuing]

[stops laughing]

No? Okay.

Well, um...

how about this?

[forced guffawing]

[stops laughing]

Fake.

What do you want from me?

[sighing heavily]

I want to break out of

the narrow construct

you're imposing on us.

What?

-I hate date night.

-Whoa--

It's fake.

[clicking light switch]

Everything here is.

[kicking the dog]

-I'm not fake. I'm--

-You know what you are?

Scared.

-I'm not scared.

You don't even know what--

-Yes, you are!

You're scared to be real!

[gasping]

Put that back on!

No!

I want to evolve,

and you're squeezing

the life out of me

before I'm even alive!

-Well, then find somebody else!

-Fine!

Maybe I will.

[dog whimpering]

My life isn't fake.

[Iam mocking forced laughter]

[Iam] It's fake.

[]

[]

[Iam] First things first,

what we need

is a little sunshine in here,

and I know

I'm not supposed to ask,

but why don't we see stuff

out there?

It's just one color

and one cloud.

No birds, no trees, no planes...

[water lapping]

[vacuum whirring]

Time to get off the couch.

You can't even move around

in here.

You want to live like this?

You know, for a lifeform,

you're not very lively.

And look at

all the tortilla crumbs--

[Iam's voice mutes]

[]

[whirring]

[]

[scrubbing]

[]

Me is...

beautiful.

Me is...

uh...

smart,

soft.

Me...

is completely corny.

Okay, stay positive,

stay positive.

Me is amazing...

and special.

Oh no...

Me is an entire spectrum.

Me is an entire spectrum

full of rainbows

and light,

and it's immense,

it's... huge,

and...

Me...

Me is...

hopeless.

[submerging]

[metal creaking]

[Iam calling] Me?

Me?

Me?

[Iam calling] Me!

[distant woman laughing]

[TV playing canned laughter]

Me?

[TV laughter and applause]

[laughter and applause]

[switching channels]

[all channels playing

the same laugh track]

[turns off TV]

[tosses remote on couch]

[rattling locked doorknob]

[banging]

[unsheathing knife]

[banging on door,

grunting with effort]

[blade clattering]

[banging on door,

struggling and gasping]

[pounding on door]

[panting]

[unlocking]

[gasping fearfully]

[tearfully] Hello?

[desperately] Me?!

[sighing heavily]

[groaning]

[]

[sighing]

Hmm.

[dog whining]

[scoffing]

Whatever.

[error tone beeps]

[error tones]

[whistling]

[dog whining]

[correct match dings]

[chuckling] Okay.

[Iam] "Deja & Liam"?

What is this?

Welcome to

"Another Day, Another Deja."

And Liam.

I don't know

if you could tell,

but it's date night.

-Ooh!

[comical slo-mo voice] Ooh!

-Date Night 2.0.

-2.0.

-[Iam] Oh no...

-[rewinding]

It's spicy vegetable

quesadillas.

Blue Apron has done it again.

[Iam] Am I supposed to be...

You're always pushing me

to be more

than I think I can be.

[Iam] And she is...

[female voice]

Is buoy lifeform?

-[male voice] No.

-[female voice] Hmm.

[Me] Here's all the information

you need about me.

It's just me!

[Iam] What a liar.

[Me] Me is...

Who am I?

Okay, stay positive,

stay positive.

[]

[sighing and sniffling]

[beeping recorder on]

Everyone is completely alone,

and this...

whatever this is,

this--this is nothing but

a pathetic cry for help.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?!

[electro dance music playing]

[]

[screaming]

[]

[robotic voice]

I don't like it here

[]

[barking and whimpering]

[hammering]

[robotic voice]

I don't like it here

[]

[Iam screaming]

[robotic voice]

I don't like it here

[sad song playing]

But you and I

Thought we had all this time

And now we're thrown

Into this world alone

[ocean waves rushing]

[]

[pinging]

[]

My name is Charlie

and I love my daddy...

She's pregnant!

[screaming]

"Koko love."

Oh, all right.

[sobbing]

Okay, Dewan, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, Dewan.

It's okay, George.

[man] Of course, Brendan.

[woman] You're our son.

[man] You gotta be kidding.

[laughing]

[]

Aw...

[laughing]

[whirring]

[]

[splashing]

[]

[Iam] It's so good

to finally see you.

[Me] It's so good

to finally see you too.

[Iam] Hi.

[Me] Hi.

[Iam] Hi.

[Me] Hi.

[Iam] Hi.

[both giggling]

[Me exhaling deeply]

It feels good to be honest.

[Iam exhaling] Yeah.

[Me] To just be me.

[whirring, voice alert]

Please move to sun .

[voice slowing]

Please move to sun.

Please move to sun.

[voice dies]

[]

[sighing]

[groaning] Oh, dusty.

[smacking dry lips]

[scoffing]

Well, good thing

there's no water.

[turning handle uselessly]

[exhaling]

Let there...

be water.

[dog whining]

[chuckling]

[sliding]

[dog whimpering]

[Iam] Hmm.

[softly] Let there...

be water.

[whispered thought]

...be water...

Keep going, you can do it,

you can do it, you can do it,

you can do it, you can do it...

Bubble bubble, you can do it...

[softly] There...

is...

water.

[dripping]

[thunderclap outside,

dog barking]

[gasping]

[rain pattering]

[water pouring]

[laughing in delight]

It's real.

[spitting] Ah...

[gagging]

[spitting]

Ah...

[smacking lips, tasting]

[thunderclap outside]

[harpsichord plays Vivaldi's

Mandolin Concerto in C RV 425]

Hmm...

It's too tangy.

[]

Ugh, too bitter.

[]

My god...

Yes!

[laughing in triumph]

This is water!

[laughing] This is water!

"Who is Iam?"

[]

"Who is the helper here

to connect with any lifeform

who encounters this planet?"

...that thou has taken

to thyself his soul.

[Iam] I am all that's left

in the universe,

as far as I can tell.

[laughing]

I am the immortal marker

for the lifeforms

who once inhabited

the planet known as Earth...

...launched just prior

to their conclusion,

as sort of a farewell,

a "let's remember when."

Preserved within me

are all their stories,

songs, pictures,

hopes, dreams, beliefs,

concepts, identities...

I am humanity's tombstone.

I am their death rattle,

doomed to circle

this little planet

for the eons it takes the sun

to become a red giant

and deliver

the final coup de grace

to the failed dream

once called Earth.

[strumming on guitar]

So no one told you...

[Iam] Some mornings,

I don't get out of bed.

...life was gonna be

this way...

[Iam] Some mornings, I do.

Your job's a joke...

"A fond kiss,

and then we sever.

A farewell, and then forever."

Your love life's DOA...

[crying]

[Iam] Sometimes I'm lonely.

...like you're always stuck

in second gear...

[Iam] Sometimes I find

that I'm very good company.

[Lizzo] I do my hair toss

Check my nails

Baby, how you feelin'?

Feeling good as hell!

Hair toss, check my nails...

[Iam] Even though

I know everything,

I've come to realize

that I know nothing at all.

Feelin' good as hell!

[Me's voice]

In here, you can be anything...

I... am.

[gasping]

[Iam] All I do

is wake up in the morning...

put my feet down, and say,

"Okay,

here I am.

What's next?"

And do your hair toss

check my nails

Baby, how you feelin'?

Feeling good as hell!

Whoo! Hair toss

check my nails

Baby, how you feelin'?

Feelin' good as hell!

Hair toss, check my nails

Baby how you feelin'?

Feelin' good as hell!

[Iam chuckling]

[babies laughing, Iam laughing]

[babies screaming

with laughter]

Baby, how you feelin'?

Feelin' good as hell!

[babies laughing]

[silence]

[]

[steam hissing]

[]

[wind blowing]

[]

[activating]

Me is...

[satellite] Not lifeform.

Goodbye.

-You are...

-Fake!

[gasping]

[sighing]

[gasping]

[lens whirring]

[gasping]

[]

[deep breath]

Hey.

[practicing] Hey.

Hey. [clearing throat]

I am so sorry

I haven't been honest with you,

but I want

to be honest with you.

[taking deep breath]

I was scared you'd leave.

I was scared that you'd think

I wasn't special,

because I was not exactly

what I said.

Maybe I was a little different

than how I presented myself,

but I'm not Deja,

I'm a liar, I'm a fake.

I'm a piece of trash, really.

I'm just a rusty...

piece of...

Stay positive, stay positive.

Okay.

[breathing deeply]

You can do this.

You can do this.

Just be honest.

Just... be...

real.

[]

Hello?

[music playing faintly]

[dog whining]

[Iam] She's pretty cute, huh?

[Me] She's... hairy.

Come here...

[calling with kissing sound]

[Me laughing]

She's, um, squirrelly...

[laughing] ...and hot.

[Iam] Hmm.

Ooh.

[sniffing]

Fishy breath.

[chuckling]

Yeah, Boo's perfect.

[dog whining]

Why Boo?

Um, I don't know,

it just felt right.

Oh.

This is amazing.

I had a lot of time.

Are you mad at me?

[sighing]

It's been so long.

Like a billion years.

Sorry.

Could you hand me that, um,

screw thing?

Thank you.

Can I help you?

Uh, I'm actually...

...done.

Oh.

What's next?

Um...

I-I don't know.

I mean, it's up to you.

What?

Date night?

I just have to...

I'm, like, in the middle

of a couple of things.

Hmm.

[chuckling awkwardly]

Um...

do you wanna, um,

do you want to see water?

Water?

Yeah. Come on.

Oh, I have to,

I have to get a cup.

Hold on one second.

[footsteps returning]

[Iam] It's cool, right?

[laughing]

You're...

better...

when I'm not...

here.

No, I...

Honestly, I'm just like,

I'm just putting together

furniture all day.

I'm not...

I'm not doing anything.

Iam,

I need to tell you something.

I'm...

What?

Uh, here,

and I'm-I'm happy.

I'm-I'm... happy I'm here.

I'm happy you're here.

[running tap water]

Tell me what you think.

[laughing]

Oh no, it's bad?

Mm-mm.

Yeah?

[chuckling]

Yeah?

Yes? Right?

-Amazing!

-Crazy!

[laughing]

I can't believe this--

Yes!

Hold on, give me your hand,

give me your hand.

Watch this. Feel that.

[running tap water]

[squealing in delight]

[Iam] Yes! Right?

It's crazy!

[Me laughing] Oh, my god!

[laughing]

Can you make it hot?

Yeah, oh yeah,

let me make it hot,

let me make it hot.

[gasping]

[laughing]

[blowing bubbles]

[video game music playing]

[Me] This is my favorite one.

[laughing]

You just do this over and over.

Woot!

[laughing] Oh, my god!

[]

[Iam] Oh!

[Me] Overlapping.

[]

[]

[Me] You can do this,

you can do this,

you can do this...

You can do this.

Why would you do this?

Why would you ruin this?

He doesn't care. He likes me.

Well, he likes Deja.

Why would he like--

[Iam calling] Me!

[]

Yeah?

[]

Oh...

Mm.

Mm-hmm?

Mm...

[laughing]

Oh, my g-- this is...

Yeah.

No, this is...

[groaning shout] Oh!

[Iam] Yeah. Yeah.

[Me] Oh my--

[Iam] Yeah.

[Me groaning] Mm!

Look at that. [laughing]

There's so many flavors.

Oh, my god, this is--

There's so many flavors.

This is the best thing

you've done.

[laughing]

I've been thinking, like,

what is mint?

Is it a taste, an experience?

Is it a compound

on your tongue...

[wind blowing, chimes tinkling]

...first time having ice cream,

right now.

And the same with, like,

chocolate, butterscotch,

blueberry cheesecake,

like, everything.

[chuckling]

You like it?

I love it.

[chuckling]

I've been thinking about...

what to say to you,

um...

forever.

I have it...

There's a lot. I have it

written down... somewhere.

[laughing]

[laughing]

Uh...

Uh...

I'm... I'm fond of you.

[chuckling awkwardly]

It's like

an old-fashioned word,

that's "fond of you."

It's like

I-I was trying to say--

It means "foolish,"

so I was trying to say

I'm a fool for you,

but, uh, it--it's like a--

It's like a saying.

-It's a stupid saying.

-Yeah.

It's a stupid saying.

I don't even know.

Yeah. [tapping spoon]

[spoons clattering to floor]

[sighing]

I wanna... be us.

If I'm supposed to be

someone I'm not, I...

I don't wanna be.

You know, like,

getting the perfect kiss

or whatever,

that's fun, but...

let's just be ourselves.

Us.

-Yeah.

-Okay.

[gasping]

[moaning]

[exhaling]

Is this okay?

[]

[Me] I don't know

if I'm doing this right.

[Iam] We are.

[Me whispering] Let's try

something different.

[Iam] Okay.

Is this okay?

[moaning]

[]

[Me whispering]

Let me try something.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

[gasping passionately]

[groaning with pleasure]

[passionate moaning]

[gasping] Oh, yeah!

[gasping]

Can you call me something?

Call me--

-[Iam] What?

-[Me] Call me Deja.

I mean--

Call me Daddy.

[gasping and groaning]

All right, Daddy.

Yeah.

[grunting and gasping

in passion]

God!

[passionate grunting

and moaning]

[]

[soft sighing and moaning]

[]

[whispering]

That was kind of weird.

Yeah.

I think...

Um...

It feels...

weird to just...

be...

I like when you're just you.

You know, we don't have to be

anyone we're not.

But what if I'm not

everything you think?

Well, I don't know.

I don't like being lied to.

I mean, I like that

we're becoming who we are--

I don't know what you mean,

because I've... always been me.

I need water.

[]

You're the only you

in the whole wide world.

[video rewinding]

-[Deja squealing]

-She said yes.

[]

-[together] It's a...

-[screaming]

[Deja] And you get to be

whoever...

you want to be.

Hey...

Mm.

[chuckling awkwardly]

I want you to feel like

we can be open with each other,

that's a thing, right?

Yup.

Mm...

This is a masterpiece.

Me, I... I like you.

Mm...

I like you so much,

but I want to scream it,

and then show it,

and not just

stand here about it.

[sighing]

I know what to do.

[]

[Iam] Hey, can we talk?

I don't know, can we?

Have you ever considered

how impossible it is

that we found each other?

A satellite and a-a lifeform?

Yeah... whoa, wait--

I need you.

And, no, I need--

Marry me.

-Now?

-Yes!

Whoa.

[cheering crowd inside]

You know,

when I first met Iam,

I wasn't sure,

because I didn't think

I knew him,

but really,

I just didn't know me.

Who are they?

Witnesses.

-[doorbell ringing]

-For what?

[sighs] Our love

transcending great distances.

Me, hey!

Hey! Me?

[]

Me!

[]

You look beautiful.

What's this?

"Partner, lover,

best friend, mentor.

My shoulder to cry on."

Me, these are not my words.

Just speak from the heart.

I like you, not--

Mazel tov!

[crowd cheering]

[Me] Let's party! Come on!

[glass breaking]

[Iam] Me...

Me!

[party chaos]

Me, stop running away.

[]

[guest vomiting]

Fine, let's talk.

Yes. Okay.

We aren't living

to our fullest.

Yeah, we aren't living

to our fullest.

-This feels fake.

-Yes.

I think in order to know life,

you need to create it first.

-Mm-hmm.

-Please don't hold us back.

-I'm holding us back?

-Just don't hold me back.

Okay.

[sighing]

[baby fussing]

Okay, can we...

can we please just slow down?

How dare you say that?

Come on, I'm not...

I'm not talking about this.

You don't want her?

-Her?

-D-do you want a him instead?

-Maybe you want a they?

-[baby squalling]

-Or a cat or something?

-[screeching]

I want you.

I want you, not Deja.

[silence falls]

You looked through

my search history.

Hey, look...

Whoa, Deja...

Deja's cool, okay,

but you are radical,

and Liam is fine, but...

Come on... okay?

Me, please...

[sighing]

[closing door firmly]

[roaring and crackling]

Me...

Me!

You knew everything,

and you just let me

make a complete joke of myself

the whole time?

This is so embarrassing!

You made a joke out of me

when you turned me

into your fake boyfriend.

Just leave me alone!

God!

[Iam] You have to listen to me

right now, okay?

You don't get to tell me

what to do anymore, all right?

You don't get to tell me

what to do,

how to think, what to be,

how to feel,

all of this stuff.

I don't like date night,

I don't like onesies,

I don't like weddings,

Deja, Liam,

any of your fake obsessions,

I don't like it.

-Okay.

-Okay?

Yeah, okay.

You don't like me!

Oh, my god,

that's not what I'm saying!

That's superlative!

Superlative means "super"!

Excessive, extreme,

exaggerated,

are all definitions

of "superlative."

[Me] That's not

how people used it!

[Iam] How do you know

how people used it?

I don't know!

Fine, it's not

superlative, okay?

It's not superlative,

it's-it's you.

You just keep saying,

"Oh, you don't like me,"

and it's just so scared!

You are screaming at me!

You're screaming

at me!

Because you are

screaming at me!

So you can scream,

but I can't scream.

-Mean.

-You're mean.

The moment we met,

you've been threatening to leave

if I wasn't good enough.

How do you think that feels?

You left me!

I am so scared, yeah.

And I left because I'm fake,

like you said.

And the only reason

that I'm lying

is because you are incapable

of just liking me!

That's your problem,

that's your problem,

is you think that I'm the one

that needs to like you.

Thank you for figuring out

my problem.

I'm all better now--

-Yeah, you know what,

that's just what it's like

when you're in a relationship

with an equal--

Would you just stop telling me

that you know more about me

than I know about myself?

-You need to not tell me

how to tell you

what I have to tell you.

[Me] Or what?

Or this isn't

going to work anymore.

Then go! [smashing]

Please leave!

Because I am exactly

who you think I am-- nothing!

So, now you see me.

You have no idea

what you're leaving,

because that is not all I am...

because there is more to me

than you could ever see...

because I-I am more

than could ever be seen.

I'm not even a buoy anymore,

I'm not Deja,

I am just...

me.

[sighing]

[Iam] Yeah.

And I'm not Liam.

I'm just who I am.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm still here.

[]

[pinging]

[Me sighs]

Can we try again?

Yeah.

[Iam] We've got all the time

in the world.

[]

[many voices talking at once]

[Me] In here...

we can create a world

just for us.

Who am I?

Who are you?

Mm, I don't know, it...

changes every day.

Sometimes I'm...

something new... [chuckles]

and then sometimes I'm just...

exactly who I used to be.

[sighing]

What if we put a window

above the bed?

[street noise outside]

Like a skylight?

We could see the stars.

Yeah.

[]

Good job. [laughing]

How long have we been here?

Let's get up.

[laughing]

Ooh, what...

should we do for dinner?

[sipping]

I don't know.

Let's go out.

Yes, you read my mind.