01x13 - A Hair-Raising Day

[bunniefuu]

[Music]

the black pig had arrived in portobello

just in time for a splendid evening at

the theater

dame thespia hammerlot who was to give a

special performance of lady black death

captain pagwash was determined to attend

though his crew were a little less

enthusiastic

oh but captain that theater is no place

for a self-respecting pirate huh know

what i mean do you want the governor to

think we're an uncultured rabble like

cut throat jake and his empty-headed

riffraff perish the thought captain

he used to do some habitat theatricals

myself a spot of shakespeare in there in

that case mr bate i will rely on you to

help these ignorant rabies brush up

their shakespeare oh no

lots of v's and vows and words ending in

this will do nicely so let's get it

ourselves off to bitty barbers for to

shaveth and cutteth the hair

if ourselves up for the show

oh

no

and tom i captain get yourself off to

the theater for some cheap tickets

say that damn thespia habelot and i are

great pals

she's a big fan of mine actually

that'll impress that pipsqueak theater

manager videos gripe right oh oh you

gave me quite a turn no listen gripe

that ghastly green gown it just won't do

you know full well that green is

absolutely out of the question with my

hair coloring it just makes me look like

the burning bush or an upside down

carrot the gal must go and that's the

end of it correct and so incidentally

must the stage manager

gee what they just didn't fight then

we'll sit here until they are biting

it's the only food you're gonna get

until the weather changes they won't

bite now the wind's getting up sport

they might fight now the wind's getting

up

spark

and there's another thing you know i'm

not going to make a scene gripe but i do

have to say

horror

that's clownage fence the ghastly green

gown

well don't just stand there looking like

a long drink of water do something

[Music]

ah

this big one is very big one get on with

it you feeble tumblers

[Music]

ha he's octopus he's very yummy no wait

is it a bear no way

ah he's very hot he's big hairy hat it's

a wig you

nincompoop

oohsweek that's a question

now it could be worth a good summer and

some money somebody would pay a good

reward for that sure good boy so take it

ashore

go to that betty barber the air dresser

she knows it is

no cheap tickets absolutely not try

coming but dame thespia is a big fan of

captain pugwash mr grey you know captain

pig swish no hug wash mug wash no

pug wash

coming

is there a problem mr griffin is there a

problem dame thespia hamilton does not

like her dressing room does not like her

costume and a cap it all has lost her

wig in the wind and you asked me if

there's a problem

oh

uh

leave it with me mr gripe

why tom don't tell me you just bought

tickets to see dang thespian helmet with

no hair

you know

sure i saw the wig blow clean off of her

head what over the rooftops down to the

key and out over the ocean oh oh

listen tony

let's go to betty's

she may be able to give us a replacement

[Laughter]

you'll know whose is here they are get

away or a sin for a militia

[Music]

oh

messy me master tom

don't you frighten bob betty like that

we're looking for a wig

we need a red wig

someone really special has lost theirs

gosh almighty why only two seconds ago

in comes at scallywag off jackship you

know the one with the big mustaches and

what did he say he stick around the door

this big red wig and they said do i know

whose is his hairy hunter

tom

what what do you think you can't stop to

explain now captain odd boy

that's him

and there's the wig look

i guess it's picking the pocket time tom

right

excuse me sir excuse me i'm conducting a

survey as part of the governor's sport

promotion campaign

would you mind showing me so whether you

can touch your toes or see

see

that show is impressive sir

thank you for your time

where he's gone my hairy heart

i'm off to betty's she'll have to wash

and groom this for us

it's a no-fit state to be handed back to

miss hamelot

it's not going to turn up there's

nothing for it we'll have to pay a visit

to that ghastly little hairdressing

fellow and buy any wig she's got

my career is over i'm finished i'll end

up as a

waitress

[Music]

that's what i said captain pogba

something about a wig

tom

out hunting a wig

rumbling rollers

i worry about that boy

oh

heck this is dame hammerlock's wig it

blew off and jake got his hands on it

and now we've got our hands on it and

before she can get her hands on it again

betty must get her hands on it tom

you've lost your head why on earth would

a team of top top-hole buccaneers like

us want to waste our time on an

actress's hairpiece

because there's a big reward for its

return

don't just stand there girl

i i have a plan get this wig shipshape

as fast as greased light no problem

captain fog wash but to do that i need

to put it on someone's head put it on

willy

hurry up oh

no too big then

[Music]

it'll have to go on you captain pogba

scattering shampoos what can you be

thinking i'm thinking about that reward

billy got that door and don't get

anybody in get laughing betty and make

it the quickest shampoo instead of your

life so that's dame amalots wiggy worth

a fortune and you've lost it one minute

is there in pocket then i touch toes and

he's gone yeah

oh brother yet

i bet that many barbers behind this come

on

quick

this is an

emergency get me a wig anyway glittery

crimpers what's going on

where's my way we must have hairy heart

[Music]

that's my wig

it's my wig i tell you oh no it's my

hair

excuse me ma'am

but captain pugwash here has kindly worn

your wig to enable it to be restored to

its former glory

these scoundrels were going to hold it

to ransom see them call the militia

seize them call the position

[Applause]

dear captain you are so glad

oh really it was nothing how can i ever

thank you

i'm sure we'll find a way

[Applause]

we are extremely fond of shakespeare

charming

now

here is the reward i promised captain ah

splendid are you setting sail soon

quite possibly madame one never quite

knows

to see or not to see

that is the question

[Music]

you