01x04 - Hard-Boiled

[bunniefuu]

Shin, where are you?

I hate crowded places.

Let's get this over with and leave.

You fool.

Don't try to slack off.

We do things the hard-boiled way.

Don't tell me what to do.

You're just Boiled.

That's harassment, you know.

Hey!

What is it?

Careful where you're stepping, Obiguro.

What?

It's an ant trail.

Don't take lives other than the targets'.

That's my motto.

Don't act all high and mighty.

He's so hot!

- Hey!
- What?!

Tell me if your feet hurt, okay?

He's so sweet!

Come on.

Hurry, just do it!

- Stop moving.
- Hurry up!

HARD-BOILED

Don't be such a wimp.
They're just eye drops.

Come on, show me the other eye.

You're lucky he had the antidote with him.

Just standard practice as a poisoner.

Who hired you?

ON BREAK

Will you let me off the hook if I tell?

Yes?

This is your poisoned knife, right?

What?

- Hey, what are you--
- Ouch!

I'm gonna spill one drop every second.

I suggest you start talking
before it's all gone.

We still haven't done my other eye!

I was hired by a company called Dondenkai.

It's a toxic workplace that makes us
work solo even on tough hits.

Then again, I guess everything
about the underworld is toxic.

You called us losers for fearing death,

and yet Lu's threat has you blabbing.

It's not like I have a death wish.

And I'm just a part-time employee,

so I don't have any particular loyalty
toward the company.

Are you registered with the JAA?

Of course.

What's the JAA?

Oh. I think...

I still have my license.

VALID UNTIL k*lled

Japanese Association of Assassins?

"JAA" FOR SHORT

They manage professional hit men.

HIT MEN - JAA - CLIENT

Mr. Sakamoto and I used to be members.

REWARD - FEE - RETAINER

There are only about 400 pros in Japan.

Kinda looks like a driver's license.

This is way harder to get, though.

You're not photogenic at all.

Give it back.

You mind if I ask a question too?

I heard you used to be in The Order.

Is that true?

"The Order"?

My, my.

So it's not just a myth.

There you are!

There they are, mommy!

We were wondering where you guys went!

Are we all ready to eat?

Hey, you're the bad guy that got beat up!

What are you guys doing?

This guy from the superhero show was
practicing escape acts,

so we came over to see!

Wow. Keep up the good work!

Hana helped make lunches!

Lunch sounds good!

There were some benches over there.

Can't wait for the lunch you made, Hana!

I made onigiri with cod roe,
and salmon, and tuna, and...

We'll take care of these for you.

Leave us alone now, got it?

What? Aren't you gonna k*ll me?

Of course not.

We're here to enjoy the amusement park.

That show you did,

it was super cool!

Bye-bye!

Uh, okay.

Did you tell him?

Yeah! And I even gave him a band-aid.

- Wow.
- How nice, Hana.

Buncha freaks.

I kinda ran out of steam.

One more ride and then I'm outta here.

What's wrong?

I have brain fog...
Must be a side effect of the antidote.

I don't think I can read minds today.

But you're supposed to be our detector!

This has never happened before.

Mr. Manager, we should leave.
We're pushing our luck.

I'm sorry to let you down, sir.

Hey, everyone?

What's wrong, Mommy?

You're all acting weird today.

Are you hiding something from me?

What?

If there's something on your mind,

I'm here for you, Tatsu.

Where do you think you're going, Tatsu?

Could you get off me please?

You're crushing me, lady.

- Shut up, you little shi--
- Hey!

What is it?

You're a nice girl,

don't spread your legs like that.

I don't know where to look.

A nice girl?

What are you doing here, Boiled, Obiguro?

Finishing your job, of course.

It's like we have to chaperone you.

If the job doesn't get done,
you'll get the axe in more ways than one.

So, what do you say?

Thanks a bunch.

I can't wait to hit the legend,
Taro Sakamoto.

Oh yeah, you've never met him.

This scar remembers him clearly.

Did Sakamoto give you that scar when--

No!

- I tripped and fell the other day.
- What? How bad did you fall...

These two are giving off
a silly vibe now, but...

In the Balkan Battles two years ago,

they k*lled over 100 people.

They're the most brutal pair
the Dondenkai has seen.

Sakamoto's crew is dead meat.

What are you talking about?

We're not hiding anything!

Did I not pack enough food?

Or do you feel sick after all those rides?

Daddy, do you guys not like theme parks?

Nonsense! We're absolutely great!

And we're having so much fun!

He got so excited that he fell off
of the roller coaster.

I guess it was all in my head.

Can we choose the next ride too, then?

Of course! Lead the way!

What next?

Ferris wheel!

No assassins so far, Mr. Sakamoto.

It'll be fine.

The park is open and well lit.

Not an assassin-friendly environment.

Here we are.

THE WARD OF WAILS

Haunted house!

This place is super assassin-friendly!

GUIDE

Welcome to the Ward of Wails.

Having been chopped up by a mad doctor,

the vengeful spirits of former patients
roam this hall of horror.

Beware,

for no soul has left the ward alive...

Ooh, how thrilling.

So spooky.

What's that?

A remedy for my nerves.

Weirdo.

OPERATING ROOM

We hope you enjoy this terrifying tour.

All right.

Up for some authentic splatter horror?

This is so well done! No wonder
it's Japan's scariest haunted house!

I love what they did with the interior.

You must be glad to see them having fun.

Stay alert.

Of course, sir.

An enemy!

Another zombie!

Oh?

The zombie stopped moving.

Pretending to be afraid and attacking
from an angle out of his wife's view?

Mr. Sakamoto, you're amazing.

ESCAPE DOOR

So scary, huh?

His hit man license?

He's a rookie that just registered.

If these are the guys they've sent,
we've got nothing to worry about.

As long as that's all they've sent.

For such a fat-a*s,
he does have some moves.

Makes me wanna see what he can really do.

HARD-BOILED GUIDE
WITH PHOTOS

It gives me chills just imagining it.

Don't lay a finger on him.

He's mine to hit, hard-boiled style.

Cut it out already.
I can't stand that sound.

You should kick this habit of
working out when you're stressed.

Don't worry, I'll let you have Sakamoto.

He's your dear friend, right?

We're not friends.

That son of a b*tch is no friend of mine.

HIT MAN TRAINING CENTER
JCC [JAPAN CLEAR CREATION]

Yo.

BOILED [AGE 15]

Sakamoto, is it?

SAKAMOTO [AGE 14]

I hear you're pretty damn good.

You beat up one of my friends in practice.

Made me wonder what kinda guy you were.

Don't worry, I'm not here for revenge.

You're a hard-boiled dude.

I dig that.

He and I were two of a kind.

Even outside of missions and classes,

we naturally started spending
more and more time together.

JCC RICE BOWL

You know, Sakamoto...

THE HIT MAN POST

...normal people celebrate
Valentine's Day today.

Not us, though. We're hard-boiled.

Our paths don't cross with chocolate and--

There he is!

- Go on.
- Um, Mr. Sakamoto,

will you be my Valentine?

I heard you liked .44 magnums,

so I used an empty round
to mold the chocolates.

Hey, Sakamoto.

Nagumo.

Check out the haul I got from the girls
in the Assassins department.

Who's he?

- No clue.
- What?!

If you want more chocolate,
you can eat those.

I had to turn down
the girls from the Poison department.

Get out of the way!

I thought we were alike,

but he wasn't hard-boiled at all.

Wait, that's his beef with Sakamoto?

I see.

Well, now you'll get to settle
an old score.

It gives me chi--

No!

I don't even care anymore.

Is he acting tough? What a cutie.

How many of them are hiding in here?

Human resources went all out.

I want to go home.

So many zombies! This is awesome!

I wonder what the next one will be like.

That girl's a real Sakamoto!

She's got nerves of steel, unlike you.

Shut up.

I'll show you.

Seriously, what's in that thing?

The Lu clan's good luck remedy.

Remedy, my a*s! This is alcohol!

OPERATION IN PROGRESS

Knock it off, you guys!

She didn't even hesitate!

I can't get through!

JAA LICENSE
VALID UNTIL k*lled

Out of my way.

Yo, Sakamoto.

Remember me?

I don't.

Where's my family?

I'm gonna show you hell.

I'm gonna make you remember me.

Not that I care or anything.

Ms. Aoi!

Hana!

Thank goodness.

They're just unconscious.

I guess I got the short end of the stick.

You little shits won't be any fun.

Who are you--

Bring it on, you old hag.

Lemme show you what my family's
passed down for 4,000 years.

Is it Tai Chi? No, Drunken Fist?

You reek of alcohol!

Oh, my.

This one's feisty, isn't she?

It gives me chills.

You really don't remember me, Sakamoto?

I told you I don't.

Drop it already.

Where's my family?

I'll tell you this.

I don't remember you that much either.

Why would I?

Answer the question.

Go look for 'em yourself.

I'm not your mama.

Boom.

This is sad to see,

Sakamoto.

Party's getting started.

What're you looking at, hag?

You're not bad.

That was a good punch. No wasted tension.

Oops?

But...

Not good enough to beat me.

I feel sick...

Lu!

The thing is,

if I actually cared,

you'd both be dead in a second.

But that doesn't give me chills, you see?

So...

Let go of me! Hey!

I wanna see what you can really do.

In my experience,

your real strength shows
when you're panicking the most.

The rules are simple.

You have to hit me once every 10 seconds.

If you fail,

your boy goes home in pieces.

You're running out of time.

Is this giving you chills?

There's no way I can do that!

I'm sorry, Shin.

She's an emotional drunk?

It's been five years since you retired.

Get it, Sakamoto?

This is the difference of five years.

The difference between you and me.

It's sad to see.

You used to be such a hard-boiled guy.

There's nothing you can do.

With my Super Ball Bombs,

also known as...

SBB.

And my Rocket Dynamite Punch,

also known as...

RDP.

I can get you at any distance, any angle.

Did you forget that, too?

So cringey.

Look at this, Sakamoto! Nagumo!

I put dynamite in here

and use the momentum from the blast.

Neat, right?

Sure, interesting.

Does it have a name?

Rocket Dynamite Punch!

RDP for short.

So cringey.

You should call it Super Punch.

Super?

That gives me an idea. Super Ball!

- All his ideas are cringey.
- I dunno about that.

- Super Ball is great!
- Go with Super Punch.

COMPOSITION
POTASSIUM PERCHLORATE 10G

I looked up to you!

You completed any mission

and got chocolates from girls.

But now, you've become so weak!

That really pisses me off!

Look at you now.

You can't protect your family.

You're nothing

but a fat-a*s!

Sweet dreams, Sakamoto.

Farewell, my sweet teenage memories.

What was that threat I just felt?

Is that the composition of my bombs?

I remember you now, Boiled.

Time to show you what I can really do.