01x04 - Don't Lose Your Head

[bunniefuu]

[suspenseful music]

♪

- Come on,

the clock is ticking.

We've gotta save Uncle Budrick

from getting ex*cuted.

[sneaky music]

According to our intel,

he's in the dungeon

being guarded by

Gastley's executioner.

[panting]

Do we really want to face

an executioner?

It's like his job to

cut people's heads off!

Oh, that sounds pretty cool.

I mean, when it's not

your uncle's head, Max.

Thanks, Millie.

- My map says this way.

- Let's go!

♪

[grunts]

- [echoing]

Wow, it's so big!

- And Gastley's so short.

- [bleats]

[exciting rock music]

- Lot of people telling me

what I should be ♪

But I want to make

my own destiny ♪

Got a feeling that

it might be time for me ♪

To find my own way ♪

'Cause I can feel it

in my heart ♪

It takes a lot to be brave,

but just a little to start ♪

Let's go take

a million chances ♪

Let's go change

our circumstances ♪

I'm gonna write my own story

and the hero is me ♪

♪

[flames whoosh]

[ominous music]

- Kevyn, which way

to the dungeon?

- Uh, I seem to have

misplaced my--

huh?

[gasps]

Give me back my map,

you even-toed ungulate!

- [gulps, burps]

- Ah! Ugh.

- Great! How are we supposed to

find the dungeon now?

- Well, what goes in

must come out.

- [farts, bleats]

- Ugh!

- Not to worry. I can take

one glance at something,

and the image is forever

burned in my brain.

- So you're saying you remember

exactly what was on the map?

- Right down to

the tiniest detail.

[footsteps approaching]

[all gasp]

- Someone's coming.

Quick, hide!

[suspenseful rock music]

♪

[door creaks]

Oi, anyone in here?

♪

[gasps]

- [sneezes] - Ah!

Hey!

- Greetings.

- Howdy!

[gasps]

[grunts]

[crashes]

Huh?

- Everyone run!

- Huh?

[grunting]

- [bleats]

- Hey, get back here!

[bleats]

Quick, over there!

[guards yelling]

[bleats]

I beg your pardon, Max.

That sneeze caught me

by surprise.

- It caught me on the arm.

- It's OK, Kevyn.

The more important thing

is figuring out

how to shake these guards.

- How are the kids doing now,

Mumblin?

[whooshing]

[screaming]

Uh, not good.

[bleating]

- She says, "you all go.

I'll distract the guards."

- Wait.

Simon, you can speak sheep?

- Huh. I guess I can.

- [bleats]

- She says,

"Trust me, it's the only way.

"And also, my name isn't Doris.

It's Roberta.

"Doris was my mom's name,

"and well, we just never

got along that well.

Mothers and daughters,

am I right?"

[guards grunting]

- Let me help you.

- Hey!

- [bleats]

- Hey, Doris--I mean, Roberta.

- [bleats]

- I don't mean to interrupt,

- but we really gotta go.

- [bleats]

- She says,

"goodbye, my friends.

"If we don't meet again

in this life,

we'll meet in the next."

Man, that's heavy.

[bleats]

[guards grunting]

[whimpers]

- [laughs]

Oh, well, look at this.

- It's just a cute little sheep.

- [snaps, growls]

[guards screaming]

[bleats]

[groaning]

Oh, ugh!

Guard!

[footsteps approaching]

You bellowed, Your Highness?

Did we wet the bed again?

- [sputtering] I don't--

I-- no!

Is it execution time yet?

I get so excited the night

before an execution.

They're my favorite things

in the whole wide world.

Sorry, Your Majesty.

It's still six hours

until sunrise.

I can't wait. Alert everyone.

I want to do the execution now!

Oh, but first,

I have to figure out

what to wear.

- I hope Doris--

I mean, Roberta is OK.

Don't worry, Simon.

She may be soft on the outside.

But on the inside?

Steel wool, baby.

Kevyn, are we close?

It should be just ahead.

Hmm.

This corridor is much shorter

than my map suggested,

and I don't remember this wall

being here.

[knocks]

[yelps]

[snoring] Tulips.

- Gonna go ahead and assume

that's the executioner.

Whoa. Look at that axe.

Must touch it.

- A-bup-bup!

No.

OK.

Now we just need to--

uh, where the heck is Kevyn?

[ominous music]

Max? Hello?

[whimpers]

- I hope you brought

my slippers.

Coming, Sire.

[gasps, whimpers]

Hmm. Hmm.

[yelps]

- My toesies are fr--

guard?

- All right.

I'm here now, Your Highness.

[snores]

Should we look for Kevyn?

We've come this far.

Let's spring

Uncle Budrick first,

and then we'll go find Kevyn.

Now, let's see.

What shall I wear

for the execution?

- I don't have

the foggiest idea, Sire.

- Nor do I.

But maybe a song would help.

[clears throat]

A king must always

look his best ♪

It's his royal duty

to be well-dressed ♪

Yet there's an event

where his finest attire ♪

Must be nothing

short of fire ♪

Fashion must be

on full display ♪

That day is here,

Execution Day ♪

[rock music]

Hmm, what to wear,

what to wear? ♪

Wear this tunic, do I dare? ♪

Maybe I'd look even better ♪

In this funny

Christmas sweater ♪

Is this cloak the solution? ♪

No, I wore it to

the last execution.

What to wear, what to wear? ♪

Oh, this shirt,

au contraire ♪

Yes, I know

I'd be a real suave stud ♪

But I don't want it covered

in someone's blood ♪

One might wonder

why I care so much ♪

Frankly, I use clothes as

a bit of a crutch ♪

When I was born,

the doctor said steadfastly ♪

"Look at this baby,

ooh, how Gastley" ♪

Conrad, the charming one,

I became the jealous son ♪

I wouldn't have

the shoulder chip ♪

If my brother wasn't so hip ♪

I dress myself to

push the pain away ♪

If only I could dress for

his Execution Day ♪

What to wear,

oh, skunk hair? ♪

Ugh! I'd look better

in my underwear ♪

When that fool is on

the chopping block ♪

My outfit,

it must truly rock ♪

I've looked through

all these closet rows ♪

It seems I hate

all of my clothes ♪

I have no choice,

I must dispose ♪

- of them!

- Ah!

- And so the question grows

and grows and grows ♪

What to wear? ♪

Oh, this is nice.

We didn't even need the song.

[claps]

Now I must accessorize.

Bring me

the royal scarf collection!

All right, boys,

"scarf collection" on three.

A-one, a-two, a-three.

Scarf! ♪

[grunts, screams]

[loud thump]

Ow.

Hmm?

[sweeping music]

[gasps]

[excited giggling]

Sweet mother of knowledge!

Your scarves, Sire.

- Ugh, finally!

Bring them here.

- Uh, Sire,

I've just received word that

Fendra would like to

speak with you.

Ugh, now?

Doesn't she know I'm preparing

for an execution?

[rock music]

- We can't just sit here

and do nothing.

The kids need our help.

[grunts]

- [gasps]

Oh, my! Homemade grenades?

- A few of these sprinkled

around the castle

would have the place in chaos.

- That would give us time to--

- Oh, my, my, my!

- That's much too risky!

- Hmph.

Like I always say,

go big or go home.

- Ah! Actually, madam,

that gives me an idea.

Maybe, just maybe,

we can go big and go home.

[both gasp]

- all: Hm?

- [snoring]

- The key we need

is around his neck.

[snoring]

[suspenseful music]

Mommy, I don't want to go

to executioners' school.

I want to be a florist.

Uhwhatever you want, son.

Now go beddy-bye.

[keys jangle]

- OK, nghty-night, Mommy.

[snores]

[gasping]

- Ah!

[sighs]

[gasps] Huh?

- [snores]

- [exhales]

- Hey, Larry, wake up!

The big guy wants to

k*ll the jester now.

- Chop-chop, literally!

- [gasps]

- [laughs]

See what I did there?

- [snorts awake]

I'm coming.

What the--hey, what's going on?

I can't see.

That's it, I'm gonna use it.

I'm gonna use it!

[grunts]

Why is this axe so heavy?

[grunting]

Oh, haha!

- I'm gonna use it!

- Nice and easy.

- That's it.

- [crazed breathing]

[laughs nervously]

- Come on.

- [grunts]

[lock clicks]

Uncle Budrick, we're here!

[scary music]

Ah!

Oh, no, we're too late!

Your uncle's

already decomposed!

- Millie, Millie,

that isn't Uncle Budrick.

None of these are.

Thenwhere is he?

What if I'm too late?

What if Uncle Budrick's--

- Max, look!

It's an escape tunnel.

Your Uncle Budrick must've

gone through here.

- Oh, gosh.

Dude, why didn't you tell us?

- [gasps]

Simon, you're right. Let's go!

[rock music]

[breathing excitedly]

Ah, what a treasure trove!

[giggles]

Think of all of the wisdom that

resides on these shelves!

[grunting]

Huh.

[coughs]

And to think Gastley uses it

merely as

a personal trash heap.

[book thumps]

Huh, how curious.

Huh. "Book of Prophecies"?

[gasps]

I simply must have you

for my collection!

[footsteps approaching]

Ooh!

- Ugh. Fendra, yoo-hoo!

Show yourself at once.

It's rude to keep

a king waiting.

- [evil laughter]

- Whoopie! You've made

your dramatic entrance.

Now, come on, what is it?

I'm supposed to be executing

my jester any moment,

and I still hate

what I'm wearing.

Be honest, what do you think

of this scarf?

- - Silence!

- Oh.

- The moment we've been

waiting for is here.

Ever since Conrad's trusty

little wizard resurfaced,

I put out feelers to

track down his whereabouts.

I haven't found him yet but

it's only a matter of time.

I do believe he's finally

within our grasp!

- Ugh, it's not even

scarf season.

I'm--I'm sorry.

Uh, who is within our grasp?

- King Conrad!

You know, the king that

everyone thinks is dead,

but is actually alive?

- [gasps]

Conrad's alive?

- - What was that?

- [gasps]

- Great news, Sire.

I found the red one.

- Excellent!

What do you think, Fendra?

Yay or nay?

Hmm?

- Ugh, forget the scarf!

Conrad is out there.

Have you thought

about what would happen

if he were to return?

Your reign would be over.

- Yes, of course

I've thought about that.

The question is, what are you

doing about it, Fendra?

Go and find my brother,

and then we'll actually

eliminate him this time.

Hmm, hmm?

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I have an execution to attend.

- [frustrated shriek]

Egad! I have to find Max.

- Mumblin, this is your plan

for saving the kids?

- It was your idea to

go big or go home.

[growls]

[hinges creak]

Aha!

Freedom!

[gasps]

- If by freedom,

you mean freedom to die,

- then you're correct.

- Uh, sorry, what?

- If by freedom,

you mean freedom to die

- What?

- Then you're correct. Ugh!

- So--so sorry.

- I-- [sighs]

Hello. Hi.

If by freedom, you mean freedom

to die, then you are correct.

- I'm sorry, it's very hard

to understand you

- with the echo.

- Oh, this is exhausting.

We have to find a smaller room.

I said, if by freedom,

you mean freedom to die,

- then you are correct!

- Oh, "die." Got it.

- Guards, grab the jester and

put him on the chopping block.

Choppity chop, chop, chop.

Ah! Ah!

No, no. Hold on!

No, now let's not be too hasty!

- Now where is that

wretched executioner?

I'm starting to get

the feeling that

no one's taking Execution Day

seriously.

[panting]

Sire, the prisoner has escaped!

- No, you foul-breathed fool!

The prisoner's right here.

Oh, uh, never mind.

- Now, Jester,

if you have any last words,

do speak them now.

But they better not be

about my outfit.

You try putting together

an ensemble so last minute!

I'd just like to say,

Max, wherever you are,

I love you,

and I am so proud of--

- Actually, if I could get

those sock puppets

before you, you know

[snickers]

That would be great.

I wouldn't want to

get any blood on them.

[in high-pitched voice]

Hello, how are you?

I'm good. How are--

[in normal voice]

What? It's not weird.

Now, off with his head!

[tense music]

[whimpers]

[evil laugh]

Hold it right there!

- Max!

- Huh?

- Wait, you're that

pesky street urchin.

Weren't you eaten by a boar?

And more importantly,

why are you interrupting

this execution?

- You can't k*ll

my Uncle Budrick.

Actually, I can.

He's a terrible jester,

and I'm the king. Proceed!

[tense music]

- Wait, wait!

Uh, you--you're right.

- He is terrible!

- Max, that is not helpful.

- But--but he's only terrible

because, uh--

because he's not a solo act!

You see, we're, um,

a group act called Max

- And

- The Midknights!

- Oh, really? And what,

pray tell, is your act?

We, umjuggle!

- Yeah.

- Yep!

- [yawns]

Do you see me yawning?

That means I've seen

juggling before.

- But you haven't seen

jugglers like us.

We're famous for juggling

really weird things,

likerazor-sharp swords.

- Swords? Hmm.

Well, color me intrigued.

I daresay such a bold display

could be ratherdangerous.

- Very! I mean, we'd show you

what we can do, but

we don't have any swords on us.

- Pish-posh!

Guards, don't just stand there.

Hand over your swords

to the jugglers!

Give--take the swords--

there you are.

Hand it--

there, very well done.

- [panting]

Your Highness,

there's been a breach

in the castle.

- Why are you

telling me this now?

Where are the breachers?

- Well, they're--oh, uh,

right in front of you, sir.

Who, them?

No, this is a band of jugglers,

you imbeciles.

You are jugglers, aren't you?

Because if not,

I'd really love to have

those swords back.

Sorry, Gastley. No can do.

- Why, you--

you deceitful little snake!

- Uh, Max,

maybe we should leave.

Yeah, agreed.

- We can't go.

Not without Kevyn.

Here I am!

Good timing. Nowrun!

♪

- Get them!

Get the juggling breachers!

[swords clanking]

Let's go! This way!

- I think these swords

are slowing us down.

Jeez, these are heavy!

- We should ditch 'em.

- Aw, do we have to?

This way! Over there!

- Silly juggling breachers,

you've run right into my maze!

Get them!

[rock music]

Hey, look, our swords!

♪

- Wait, didn't we just

come from this way?

- Oi!

[kids scream]

Oi, stop!

You won't get away from us!

Another dead end.

OK, let's not panic.

- Honestly, I think panic

is our best move right now.

Help! We're lost!

- [screaming]

- This is terrible.

I've literally led my friends

into a maze.

I'm not just gonna get Uncle

Budrick's head chopped off--

What?

- I'm gonna get

all our heads chopped off.

Wait a tick.

I've seen this maze before,

from the window in

Gastley's bedroom.

Now, I believe we entered the

maze through Gastley's sternum,

and we'll be able to exit

through his crown. Follow me.

[dramatic music]

- Have you found them yet?

Hello?

They are ruining Execution Day!

- No, no, no. It's this way.

It's this way, dummy.

Don't call me a dummy, dummy!

- Oh, forget this. There's an

easier way through this maze.

- This way.

We're almost out.

[axe clanks]

[kids screaming]

Ah!

- There!

- A door!

Now to get out of here.

[grunts]

It's locked.

- Look, it's Roberta!

- [bleats]

- Wait, it's Doris again?

Oh, I see.

As we've been working through

the maze,

you've been working through

your mommy issues.

Aw, Doris, good for you.

And I'm so glad you're alive.

Not alive for long.

Finish them.

[kids whimpering]

[Doris bleating]

[dramatic music]

♪

[evil laugh]

[grunting]

- [loud thud]

- [growls]

- [gasps]

- What's going on?

- Ah!

- What's that? Is that a--

It's a giant!

[loud rumbling]

- Ha-ha-ha!

How you like me now?

- Dad?

- That's right.

♪

Climb aboard.

Grab a finger!

[all shouting]

- Looks like we made it

just in time.

Mumblin!

What sorcery is this?

Ah! Where is Fendra

when you need her?

You, don't just stand there.

Chop him down or something.

- [weapons clank]

- [clears throat]

[guards yelling]

And a splinter, too. Ah!

Oof!

Ouch.

- You made Nolan a giant?

- Well, not on purpose.

I was actually trying to turn

him into a big wooden horse

that we could all, hmm,

escape in.

But hey, well, uh,

this works too.

- All this effort just to save

one troubadour.

You really know how to

make a guy feel special.

And Max

♪

[rock music]

♪

- [people screaming]

- What is that?

[yelling, gasping]

- Ah, it's a giant!

Oh, it's Nolan.

- Did you get them?

- They're right here.

♪

[laughter]

- Oh, you're OK.

I was so worried about you all.

- [clears throat]

Forgetting someone?

- No, no, I'm here and

Alice is fine--oh!

Oh, yes, of course,

of course, you.

Uh, let's cut you down

to size, Nolan.

Sha-ba!

- [squeaky voice]

Ah, that feels better.

Hey, wait!

- [chuckles]

Uh, let's try that again.

- Oh. Ah!

There we are. There we are.

No, that's--

oh, that's not right.

No, that's not right.

Oh, no.

Oh, here? No.

- Come on, Mumblin!

Put your back into it.

Ah!

- Phew! I was starting to get

a little worried there.

- Oh, this blasted thing

needs a tune-up.

Right, it's the wand's fault.

- Come on, everyone.

Inside.

- Mom, wait!

I have important news.

King Conrad is alive.

- [gasps]

- [gasps]

- Alive?

- Hmm?

Say what now?

- Your Highness, unfortunately,

we lost the giant

- and the juggling breachers.

- [grumbles]

Could you explain to me

how you lose

[shouting]

a 50-foot-tall man?

- Well, you see, he was

running in a zig-zag pattern--

No excuses.

I want you to bring me

Max and the Midknights,

dead or alive.

[flames roar, swords clank]

[exciting rock music]

♪