01x02 - Masturbation is Important

[bunniefuu]

[Molly] I did it.

I left Steve.

f*ck. f*ck. Where do I live?

By getting divorced,

am I just single?

Like, right now, am I a single

person with stage-four cancer?

Why would I do that? Why

would anyone do that? f*ck.

I'm just gonna head to my place, and

then we'll figure it out from there.

What's the plan?

I just wanna be touched by someone

who wants to touch me. [chuckles]

[breathes sharply]

Is that crazy?

[Nikki] No. No,

that is not crazy.

- Okay. [sniffles]

- [Nikki] Yeah.

[Molly] f*ck.

Okay.

- This is gonna be amazing.

- [Nikki] Yeah.

- [Molly] f*ck. f*ck. f*ck. f*ck.

- Okay.

Yeah, this is good.

- [breathes deeply]

- [Molly] I have nothing with.

- I can do this. [chuckles]

- [Nikki] Mm-hmm.

[Molly] Why did I wear

overalls this morning?

What kind of man wants to f*ck a woman

with cancer who also wears overalls?

Okay. [exhales sharply]

- Ignore that I'm crying.

- [Nikki chuckles]

This is This is This is good.

Okay. [chuckles]

You got it. [chuckles]

- [sniffs] - [Molly] The

air smells different.

[upbeat music playing]

[Molly] Is this a sign?

Is this a sign

from the universe?

Yes! Yes to everything

you were just acting out!

[Nikki chuckles] God, he's

putting so much effort into that.

[Molly] Thank you.

[switch clicks]

[Molly] About me.

I like music and the ocean?

No.

I'm a dirty, dirty sl*t who

likes windsurfing and pottery

and giving weird sad blow jobs.

No.

I'm 40, homeless, married, can't

feel my breasts, and I like trees?

- [phone dialing]

- Oh, my God.

[sighs]

- Hi.

- Hi.

Hi.

Okay. We know Nikki's not gonna be

able to take care of you, right?

[Steve] I think she has

emotional problems. [chuckles]

No, she doesn't.

She's just loud.

Like, some undiagnosed

form of adult ADHD.

[sighs] She's never been in a

relationship for more than a year.

How do you know she's not

gonna bail when it gets hard?

Look, I know you

guys have a thing.

Whatever that is, I understand

the power of female friendship.

I do. I know every

word to Beaches.

You used to jerk off to Beaches.

Ha ha. No, I didn't.

Look

The only reason she likes you is because

you never call her out on anything.

- You know it, and I know it.

- [sighs]

You're always just there

whenever she needs you.

[phone whistles, buzzes]

That's That's what this

situation is. Okay? I said it.

[Molly] What is that? Is that

That's a chode!

Hello?

I joined a dating app.

You're [scoffs] You're

immunocompromised. [chuckles]

You can't do that. You

can't just go and have s

You're gonna have

sex with strangers?

This is what you do. You

You run away. You disappear.

It's like I don't even know

who the f*ck you are sometimes.

And, like, Nikki's not gonna

be able to take care of you.

She can't handle it, okay?

I said it. I said it.

She can't handle what's coming.

She's like She's a child.

She just makes noises.

That's all she does.

Bad. Come, wait upon him.

Lead him to my bower.

The moon, methinks, methinks,

methinks

- "Looks with a watery eye."

- No [stammers] I got it. I got it.

The moon, methinks, methinks,

looks with a watery eye.

And when she weeps,

weeps every little

- f*ck me!

- Yeah, no, no. You got it.

"Every little" f*ck me.

[chuckles]

Did they forget about us?

Oh, no, this is what it's like.

You wait a half an hour to get called,

then you wait again in the room.

Like, 80% of having

cancer is waiting.

- [Molly sighs]

- [Nikki groans]

Is this gonna make you

late for rehearsal?

Mm-mmm. No, it's

fine. I'll make it.

Okay, I don't want this

to mess up your life.

I want you to have time for

Noah and the play, and

Yes. I will. It's not like

I'm solving world hunger.

I'm still living off the

residuals from a TV show

where I played Benjamin

Franklin's wh*re.

You were so great in that.

- Thank you.

- [phone whistles, buzzes]

God, this is so exciting. Look at how

many pictures of penises I'm getting.

- [Nikki] Wow.

- [Molly exhales sharply]

What a fantastic p*nis.

It's like a sunflower

just bending

- towards the sun.

- Yeah, I know. It's, like, hopeful.

- Mmm.

- [chuckles]

[Dr. Pankowitz] So,

as we discussed,

you have bone metastasis

in your pelvic region.

- [Molly] I can't - [Dr.

Pankowitz, muffled] Treatment

- I can't do this again.

- to slow the spread of the cancer

- and relieve any symptoms.

- What if I get up, walk out, die in a hole

- without doctors or medicine or -

But the main goal is to fight this

- for as long as we can.

- I could die like a bear.

I'm going to deploy all

the weapons in my arsenal.

- How do bears die? In caves?

- Okay. So, uh

There caves in New York?

My mission is to extend your

life as long as possible.

Now, the

Steve takes notes.

Oh, yeah. For sure. Got it.

- [Molly] No. Not the bag.

- [Nikki grunting]

The bag is so bad. The

bag makes me so afraid.

- [Nikki] I -

[Dr. Pankowitz] Um

[Nikki] Oh, my gosh.

[Dr. Pankowitz clears throat]

Are we getting close?

Close to computer. [groans]

Okay, I have the 'Kay.

Are there two separate

crumb cakes in there?

- That's what they appear to be.

- It's a long story.

Uh, now, uh, first, we're going

to do some follow-up diagnostics

to, uh, assess the biochemical

and hormonal activity.

You'll need to schedule a,

uh, full-body scan ASAP.

- I'm so sorry. Sorry.

- [stammers] What?

I'm gonna interrupt and

ask a lot of questions,

'cause that's how my

ADHD presents itself.

Not that I I don't know

if I actually have ADHD,

but I'm pretty sure I do.

Um, would you mind just going a bit

slower and then I can probably take,

- like, "Steve notes," and

- [Dr. Pankowitz] Yeah.

The biopsy showed

hormone-positive cancer,

so we're going to, uh, begin monthly shots

of leuprolide to lower estrogen production

and, uh, get you into menopause.

- Menopause? [chuckles]

- Menopause.

- [Nikki chuckles] Right.

- What?

- Sorry. That's funny.

- [both chuckling]

'Cause I just thought that

the one benefit of dying young

was that I wouldn't have

to go through menopause.

- So, uh, you can you can expect symptoms.

- [Nikki chuckling]

Um, hot flashes, mood

swings, insomnia,

uh, muscle pains,

uh, decreased libido.

Oh, wait, no. Sorry.

That's not gonna work

with Molly's goals.

[Molly] It's okay, it's okay.

- Don't think about this.

- [Nikki] What else do you have?

- Think about dicks.

- [Dr. Pankowitz] What do I have?

There's so many dicks pouring

into your inbox right now.

- That is the first line of treatment.

- Yes. Dicks.

- [stammers] Let me see if I can explain.

- Dicks.

- Imagine you're playing a round of golf.

- Big dicks, little dicks

Lines of treatments

are like golf clubs.

Round dicks, smooth

dicks, funny dicks.

So, hormone therapy, that

would be like my driver.

It's not a lofted

club, but it's What?

Oh, no, no. So sorry.

Thank you so much.

We don't understand

golf metaphors at all.

- It's just not gonna happen.

- Dicks.

- Oh.

- Can you explain what you are saying?

- Ooh, that's a cool one.

- Yes, uh, I can.

- Yeah.

- [Nikki] Thank you.

So, like, a nine iron. Now,

that that is a lofted club

Oh, my God. No, not the golf.

- I don't want you to explain golf.

- Just ask. Ask the question.

When am I going to die?

The research is

changing every day,

and every case is different.

But the five-year survival

rate is around 30%.

So not immediately, but soon.

I can't cure you, but

I can give you time.

So get that scan and let's

get you into menopause, huh?

Okay. Right. [sniffles]

- [Nikki] So, for the

scan today, - [sighs]

- I don't have time for this.

- we need to send Molly's records over.

But you can't do that because a

hospital in the great city of New York

cannot communicate with its

patients unless it's through

An app called MyChart.

The main things you need are

ID, insurance card, any CDs

Any CDs like, actual

1998? We're talking CDs?

Yes. Um, I'm gonna go

get them from Steve.

Okay. I'm coming with you.

- No. You have rehearsal.

- Oh, my God. I have rehearsal.

- I'll just be a little bit late.

- No, um, I got it. I got it. I got it.

I'm in. Calling. It's I'm fine.

- Okay.

- I got it. I'm good.

- [Molly] Really. Go.

- Okay. All right. Okay.

So, I'll just see

you at the scan.

- Yeah.

- Amazing. We're doing it.

- Oh. Have some cake.

- Oh, my God.

- It's loose and unwrapped.

- Whoo!

- I love you.

- I love you. I love you. Okay.

[Molly] Okay. I'm

just gonna call Steve.

Molly, your friend,

uh, left her laptop.

- Thank you. Uh - Mm-hmm.

So, is Steve just gone?

Oh Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Okay.

[Molly] I don't have time.

Do you want to meet in

person and do it with me?

No.

- Come and get this a*s, boy.

- [chuckles]

So,

on this card, I think

I have some points.

Um. Yeah, I'm not I'm not exactly

sure how long I'm staying.

[Molly] Uh, yes. I'd like your

finest suite to do some hard-core sex

with a guy named Jason R.

Who just messaged me back.

Nope.

[bell dings]

[Molly] Oh, no. Is he real?

Is my cancer making me hallucinate

male models in elevators?

[bell dings]

[Molly] God, you smell.

Have you been working out?

Look at those AirPods

so tight in your ears.

Oh, I wish I was an AirPod

in your ear. [sighs]

Talk to him. Talk to him. You're

gonna be dead in less than five years.

It doesn't matter. Nothing

matters. Talk to him.

Hey.

- [Molly] Yeah. That's good.

- Sorry?

Do you wanna come up to my room?

Why?

Oh. [chuckles]

Yeah. Cool. [chuckles]

[both exhale sharply]

[chuckles]

- [Molly] Cool. Yeah. What the f*ck?

- [bell dings]

He's gonna see your

mastectomy scars.

Gonna have to hear

about his childhood.

Are you gonna get

his email address?

Are you guys gonna

stay in touch?

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I

changed my mind. [chuckles]

- [stammers, sighs]

- Have a great rest of your day.

[grunting, chuckling]

[moans]

[exhales sharply]

I like your overalls.

[moaning]

[breathing heavily]

[actor] Where's Peaseblossom?

- [others] Ready.

- [actor] Oh.

No. No. You [groans] You enter

like a waterfall. [whooshes]

- [Steve] I don't know.

- [Nikki] What does that mean?

- [Steve] You can't do anything

- Waterfall.

- [Nikki] I know that.

- [Steve] Oh, you know?

I'm just I'm at work, Steve.

She was supposed to call you.

Well, she didn't. And you don't

know where she is. So, you lost her.

I didn't lose her. I'm meeting

up with her after my rehearsal.

We're gonna go get a scan.

I know. Uh, uh, I get push

notifications from from MyChart.

Did Did you set up your

push notifications?

No, Steve. I haven't

had a chance to do that

in the half a day that I've

been dealing with this.

Okay. Look, the

folder and the drive,

they have a username and

password for the portal,

- Oh.

- uh, social security, uh, infor Hold on.

[Steve] Uh, this

is super important.

This CD has all of her

medical records, okay?

- Okay.

- It's got PDFs from four years

- of breast cancer treatment, okay?

- Okay.

Can I get the MyChart info?

- You gave me the portal info.

- MyChart is the portal!

- Jesus!

- Okay.

No, not okay.

It's not okay because

you have no idea

what it means to take care

of somebody with cancer,

and you're the least organized

person I've ever met.

- Okay.

- Here's the deal.

You can be the fun friend, but

if you're gonna be a caretaker,

you're gonna have to be

there all the time, okay?

You're gonna have to

manage everything,

and you're gonna have

to watch her in pain.

- [inhales sharply]

- [actor] Uh

He He wants to see

you stroke my snout.

- Okay.

- [Steve] Wow.

Cool. Go do that. No. Go

stroke his f*cking snout.

Do you really think you're the

person to take care of her?

- [sighs]

- Nikki. Donkey time.

[sighs] Okay. I know that

you're in pain right now, Steve.

I am too. I am.

- [Nikki] Okay.

- So, here

- Thank you. Sorry.

- [phone beeps]

[Nikki] Okay. So I

come up to him and,

"sleep thou, and I will

wind thee in my arms."

Um, why do I have a charge for $1,000

on my card for a hotel in midtown?

This is my place of work.

And 200 for some kind

of sexual toy store.

- [sighs]

- What the f*ck is going on?

[vibrator buzzing]

[Molly] Well, this is the

biggest vibrator I've ever use.

[vibrator cranking]

No.

What?

No.

[shudders]

Okay.

Oh.

- Ma'am, you did very well.

- [vibrator buzzing]

Actually, you were incredible.

I've never seen

driving like that.

- Annie.

- What?

- It's my name. Annie.

- [Molly] Call her Annie.

- Annie.

- [Molly] Yeah, call her f*cking Annie.

[Annie] As opposed to ma'am.

- [chuckles] Okay.

- [Molly chuckles]

[laughing]

- [Molly] One more time.

- [vibrator buzzing]

You can do it!

[breathing heavily]

- [website user breathing

heavily] - [buzzing continues]

Talk about your t*ts. They hug?

No. They're nice.

[stammers] I wouldn't call

them huge, but they're great.

[website user breathing

heavily, moaning]

And what did your mom say when

you brought up the nursing home?

She changed the subject.

- She always changes the subjec.

- Mmm.

[website user] I

like talking to you.

Aw, I like talking to you.

Can I see your p*ssy?

No, I don't think so.

[phone beeps]

Okay. Uh, thanks for watching.

Uh, don't forget to subscribe

to my YouTube channel.

Okay, I will. Thank you.

[Molly] What the f*ck?

She's on her way. Just

please hold the appointment.

Oh, come on, Carla. I can tell

you're starting to like me

by the way that you're

avoiding eye contact.

To schedule the next available, I

need an insurance card and records.

Okay. Let's do that.

What? [sighs] No.

Uh, I had the CD with the

with the thing.

With the records.

[sighs] It's here

f*ck it.

[phone buzzing]

[sighs]

- Molly. [sighs]

- Nikki.

I've been trying to call you.

[Molly] Nikki, I clicked

a bad link on your laptop.

[stammers] Oh, my God.

I don't have my laptop!

[Molly] No, I I know, I have it.

It's been hacked by

some kind of a porn man.

I don't know who he is, but someone

has a video of me masturbating.

- Pick that up.

- Sorry.

Um, is it a video that's,

like, clearly you?

Or will people think

that that's me?

[Molly] How is that your first

question? Nikki, help me! Help me!

I'm sorry! I'm 'Kay. Yes,

I'm coming. I'm hanging up.

Clean that up.

[chuckles] I'm not gonna leave

all of my things on the floor.

Deeply humiliating.

To just observe me as I

exist in my own personal hell.

- Where are you?

- Don't walk in front of the computer.

- I don't know if the camera is on.

- [gasps]

- Oh, my God.

- The screen just froze, and then

and then that window popped up

and said they have a video of me.

What's going on here, buddy?

- Well, I got a vibrator delivered.

- Let me see it.

Well, it's it's resting right now

in the ice bucket. It overheated.

What?

What the f*ck did

you do to that thing?

I didn't call Steve.

I panicked, and I I came to this

hotel, and then I got a room,

and then I tried to meet a guy,

but but I got scared, so-so

so I just [sighs] I

masturbated all day.

No, that's good. That's good. That's

good. Masturbation is important.

[Molly] What if I just

Steve thinks I'm just, like, running

away into some kind of a fantasy.

No. No, you're doing

everything you need to do.

Uh, speaking of, I saw Steve.

Um, I got your records from him,

and now they're not in my bag.

- You lost my records?

- Well, they were in my bag. I'm just

Your bag is a black hole.

I've always hated your bag.

You need to clean your bag.

You need to organize your bag.

[scoffs] Okay.

- [sighs]

- I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

[sighs] I don't

know how to do this.

I'm not, like, a pro at

taking care of people.

I'm bad at taking

care of people.

Not your fault. It's

too much to ask.

- Yes, it is.

- I'm calling Steve.

Don't do that. Don't call Steve.

No, don't do that. I can do this.

Don't go and hide and

be safe with Steve.

He does not care about what

you want or who you are.

And that's why you married him.

And it was chickenshit then,

and it's chickenshit now.

[laptop beeping]

sh*t. The screen.

It's growing.

[Nikki gasping]

Oh. Look at you. Look at

you. You are so beautiful.

[chuckles]

[laptop beeping]

- [Molly gasps] Oh, my God.

- [Nikki] No. What?

- Oh, my God! Can I use your credit card?

- Oh, no, no. Me?

Please. Steve will get a bank

alert on our joint account.

- I don't I don't have that.

- [gasps]

We want to help you.

I mean [stammers] it's

not like a chat, right?

Oh, my God.

[Nikki] Sir, we want

to be cooperative.

We're just trying to figure out where

the funds might come from at this point.

[sighs] Coming back was the

right decision. [clears throat]

No, I'm not back. I

I I fixed everything.

I paid the ransom to the man.

I don't know how much it was

'cause it was in Bahamian dollars,

but that's okay.

I want you to have

everything you want.

And if what you want is to

masturbate with men online [stammers]

I'm okay with that.

- [sighs]

- Why?

Because I think this is all some

part of your healing process

around your your

your core wound.

I'm sorry, can we

please close this?

I can't keep looking

at this photo of you.

- Why not? Why can't you look at it?

- [sighs]

It's disgusting. I don't

wanna see you like that.

I Like I said,

I'm open to you

exploring your urges.

I just As long as this

doesn't happen again.

- I shouldn't have called you.

- [Steve] What?

I'm not gonna call you again.

Come on. Just Is it 'cause

I said "disgusting"?

We don't need to get divorced.

I don't want anything from you.

I don't want any money.

I'm gonna liquidate my 401(k).

I had that before we met.

And

And now we know I'm

not gonna get old, so

Jesus.

[Molly] Go. Go.

[Steve] Oh, God.

Hey. Don't

Don't do this.

The only thing that I ask is if I

can stay on your insurance, okay?

Yeah. Yeah, of

course. Of course.

Molly, I'm tryna protect you.

I'm sorry I said that. I just I'm

trying to keep you safe. Okay?

[sighs] That was stupid.

I shouldn't have said it.

Do you think we even

know each other?

Yeah, I do.

[sighs] I think we do.

Look what I found.

It was stuck inside

my leaf face.

Of course it was

in your leaf face.

I'm sorry.

Can we just get drunk? Because it's

my last night before menopause.

What's all that?

This? I moved out. This

is my lamp now. I did it.

Oh, my God. Oh, this is

all your stuff! [gasps]

- Okay.

- [grunts]

All day I've been thinking

about this one thing,

which is that my

Aunt Pearl told me

that she had the best sex of

her life during menopause.

It's like they make you think

that's not gonna happen,

but in fact, she, like, really focused up

about it and she kind of, like, dedicated

It was, like, in her

schedule. I remember this.

It cut into her hours at the community

center. She didn't give a sh*t.

What are you What

are you What is this?

Can I look where you're looking?

Is that for me, or is he

trying to get a drink?

I think that's for you.

Do you think he can tell I've

come six times already today?

Oh.

Who's gonna make

it number seven?

- Nice lamp.

- [chuckles]

Hell yes. I'm gonna

empty my voicemail box,

which actually is

something that I have to

[chuckles] I've been meaning to do it. I

love you. My phone will be on. [squeals]

[hip-hop music

playing on radio]

[Molly] I probably shouldn't

have brought this lamp with me.

I want him. I want him to

rub that beard on my face.

[chuckles]

[Molly] I want him.

Oh, God. I want him right

now. I can't wait anymore.

I can't wait. I

Do you wanna kiss me?

Yeah, very much.

[music stops]

[Molly breathing heavily]

- [tires screech]

- [horn honks]

[music resumes]

Did I You okay?

No, it's great. Keep going.

- Okay.

- Okay.

[both moaning]

- I love your boobs. [chuckles]

- [chuckles] Thanks.

- [driver] Jesus. f*ck.

- Okay. Hold on. Hold on.

- sh*t. sh*t, sh*t, sh*t, sh*t, sh*t.

- Oh. What?

sh*t. sh*t, sh*t, sh*t.

- I'm gonna come. [groans]

- Oh.

- Not in my car. Not in my car!

- [moaning]

- [driver] What the f*ck?

- I barely touched you.

[moaning continues] Oh.

Come on, dude.

Hey, I got you.

I'm sorry. Oh. [groans]

I'm coming! [groans]

[moans] Oh! Sorry. [moans]

- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

- It's okay. It's okay.

- It's okay.

- That felt so good.

- [Molly gasps]

- [tires screech]

- Get the f*ck out of my car.

- I don't think he can.

- I'm sorry.

- Get out of my car! Get out of my car!

Get out of my car!

[hookup] Your side. Your side.

- [grunts, chuckling]

- [hookup breathes sharply]

- [chuckles] Are you okay?

- Ah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

I'm sorry. Thank you. I'm sorry.

- Oh, sh*t. My hat. My hat.

- Your hat. Your hat.

Her hat.

- Don't forget the hat. Yeah, yeah.

- [chuckling] Are you okay?

- [chuckling] - Hold on.

It's too tender. Don't.

It's too much right

now. [exhales sharply]

- I'm sorry.

- [chuckles] No, don't be sorry. It's fine.

- Sorry. I'm sorry.

- [hookup] No, no, no

["Upside Mine" plays]

Upside mine ♪

Upside mine ♪

When you touch my body

With your fingertips ♪

Touch my body

Till I don't exist ♪

Touch my body Till

it really fits ♪

Touch my body

Please, please, do it ♪

Upside mine ♪

Upside mine ♪

Upside mine ♪

Upside mine ♪

When you move your

body Up next to mine ♪

Move your body up

And give a sign ♪

Move your body up

And turn it around ♪

Move your body up

And slide it down ♪

Upside mine ♪