01x16 - Episode 16

[bunniefuu]

I want you to stay away
from my wife.

Dr. Nicole Dupree Richardson.

Can I get you something?

That woman had the audacity,

the sheer gall
to show up to my home

unannounced like a raging bull.

I take full responsibility
for my shameful behavior.

We definitely won this round.

So, you're telling me
you're out here

-sleeping with two guys?
-I didn't say that.

Chels, I swear.

[chuckles] Chill.
It's one guy and his wife.

This video is incredible.

Andre, were you...

-about to kiss me?
-[chuckles nervously]

Andre?

[stammers]

I guess I need to work
on my impulse control.

Yeah, you do that.

I have a boyfriend
who I love very much.

And your lack of impulse control
must have come

with a side
of selective amnesia,

because somehow you seem
to manage to forget

all about Derek.

[door opening]

Eva, what's going on?

Oh, Kat had a friend over
for dinner earlier,

and I had some things
to finish up on my computer,

but then I saw
the way she left things,

so I just wanted to pitch in
and help out.

Thanks, but it's not your job
to clean up after my daughter.

My job is about making
your life easier,

which includes making sure
you don't come home to a mess.

Since I have you here,

would you mind helping me out
with something else?

-Anything.
-I want to find a server

from the awards banquet
last night.

Her name's Sherry Carter.

[huffs]

Mm.

Oh.

[grunts]

Ugh.

Stop being so damn happy.

Oh, crap.

♪ ♪

I mean it, babe.

I'm gonna make it up to you
for cutting our honeymoon short.

I promise.

In so many delicious ways.

Hayley.

Baby, are you sure
you're not disappointed

that we left Italy early?

I'm fine, Bill.

But look at this traffic.
We're not moving at all.

I just want to be home.

What was I thinking?

I can, I can refill this bottle
with some other expensive wine.

Bill would spot that
in a heartbeat.

And I can't put the cork back in
and the foil back on.

[gasps]

Please, please, please,
please, please.

Please, please, please.

Okay.

Thank God you're there. Help!

-Ashley, hear me out.
-You can't explain away

trying to kiss me.

But it didn't happen.

Look.

Ashley, I'm sorry, it--

That's not an excuse, but...

Look,

what didn't happen
but almost happened,

it was out of line, all right?
And I'm sorry.

[scoffs]

Look, I don't mean to overreact.

I mean, nothing
actually happened.

But what almost happened

cannot actually happen, Andre.

-Yeah.
-I love Derek.

I know. I know.

Okay.

Look, I'm sorry.

[elevator dings]

[sighs]

DEREK:
Ash.

[chuckles nervously]

Additional sponsorship
provided by...

-Where did you come from?
-From what is now

my former hospital room.

Can finally
blow this place, babe.

Came looking for you
to give you the good news.

Well, discharged patient or not,
you cannot just get in a chair

and wheel yourself around
the hospital without assistance.

-We have rules.
-Yeah?

Any rules against this?

-Derek, Derek, Derek.
-[laughs]

Or how about rules against...

...telling my girlfriend
how much I love her.

Dad? Pop.

Don't say anything to them.

You can't keep trying to deal
with this by yourself.

How was school?

Same old. Come on, Samantha.

-Back down here for homework.
-SAMANTHA: Okay.

Something's off.

You got that
in less than ten words.

When you know, you know.

Um, Sherry with one "R" or two?

Uh, two. Uh, if I hadn't seen
her name tag last night,

I'd have no idea.
I barely know her.

Oh, okay. I'll call the club.

Hopefully they know
how to track her down.

I've never seen her
at the club before,

so she must have been
extra staff

that they brought in
for the events banquet.

I... It was such a surprise
to see her like that.

You mean you know her
from somewhere else?

We met a few days ago.
The encounter was... memorable.

I heard from one of the nurses

about you talking
a suicidal woman

off the hospital roof.
Was that her?

I'm sorry, Eva.

I can't talk about the details
of that incident.

I get it.
Um, I'll make that call.

Oh, and you should know
that Sherry got fired

from the gala that night
and asked to leave the club.

Oh, um, then I'm sure

the banquet manager will
remember her.

NICOLE: I really want
to make sure she's all right.

So if you need to drop my name
to get a phone number

or an address, do that.

Okay.

What the hell are you doing
in your ex-husband's new house?

Is it Glorietta Interiors?

You'd think Bill would get
a new designer for the new wife.

-Were you able
to get everything?
-Yes.

And you don't get to see
a bit of it

until you answer my questions.

Why are you here?

And what is with this strange
and very specific shopping list?

[gasps]
Dani!

This is Bill's fault.

The minute he took over
that press conference

and told the world
how little I matter...

Ugh. Consider the source.

That man is not fit
to kiss your Louboutins.

You matter a hell of a lot
more than he does.

This is why you are my oldest--

make that dearest--
friend in the world.

Same goes.

What needs to be done?

We have got to get everything
back where it was.

There cannot be
one speck of evidence

that can be used against me.

Mm. Bill can be a force
in the courtroom.

Who cares about him?

I fear the wrath
of Anita Dupree.

[exhales]

What's up with you two?

Tyrell.

You got something on your mind?

No chatter, please.

You guys are always honest
about how quiet study habits

are vital to getting
into a good college.

You're both right.

School is important,
but so is family time.

I'm in the middle of something.

The sooner you share,

the sooner you can
get back to it.

You first, Tyrell.

Is everything good at school?

-Well--
-I got asked out today.

To what and by whom?

It doesn't matter,
since I'm the only


who's not allowed to date.

Samantha, we've
already discussed this.

Then it was a possibility.

Today I had to turn down
a crush material guy

because I had to hit him
with a no and a lame excuse

because my two dads
won't let me go out with boys.

That's not only mad unfair,
it's humiliating.

Do we even know this boy?

-So not the point.
-I disagree.

Pop, you're all about freedom.

-[chuckles] I enjoy it.
-Shouldn't I have

the same freedom to explore
that all my friends have?

What kind of "exploring"
are we talking about here?

SAMANTHA:
Pop, don't be cringe.

That's not what she meant.
Come on.

I just want to be clear
what you're talking about

when you say you want to date

these young,
horny little b*stards.

Why are you taking it there?

Because, Samantha, he's a boy.

And everyone except for you
in this house knows

exactly what that means.

For me, it means
hitting up a movie.

That might not be so bad.
With supervision, of course.

Yeah, yeah.
We could do like a double date.

It would be a secret
double date.

Your pops and I would be seated
a few rows behind you.

We'd even pay for the popcorn.

[muffled scream]

[laughs]
Okay, joking.

I don't think she has a sense
of humor about this, Martin.

But it might be time to rethink
the no-dating rule.

I think that it's at least
worth the discussion.

Bet!

Discuss it into a "yes"
this time, please.

No promises on the outcome.

If I'm well enough to go home,

I'm well enough to leave here
on my own two feet.

You have been around
this place long enough

to realize that it has rules.

[chuckles] And you're the queen
of following rules. I know.

-You should be glad I am.
-Oh, yeah?

Thought I was the only one

coloring outside
the lines today.

What rule were you tempted
to break, Nurse Perfect?

Well, I had a highly illicit
make-out session

at this very nurse's station
just a little while ago.

Did you now?

I even ended up
in a patient's lap.

Can you believe it?

You bad, bad girl.

Oh, I am.
[weak chuckle]

Those activities are
frowned on around here.

Breaking the rules like that,

you must be in love.

And who can object to that?

Not me.
[scoffs]

Come on.

Let's get the man
of my dreams out of here.

Danielle Dupree, you are
nothing if not consistent.

-And that is not a compliment.
-I will admit,

I am an "act first,
ask questions later"

type of gal.

You always say that
when we're in the middle

of an impossible situation
you created.

Now is not the time, Pamela.

We don't have time to delve
into the core of my personality.

I can't have

Bill and Hayley get back
from their stupid honeymoon

and put together
that I was here,

or that I helped myself
to their wedding present,

or that I adjusted
their wedding photo.

Honey, you breaking in here
was bad enough.

Everything else is just
cherries on top.

I didn't break in, per se.

One of the security guards has
a soft spot for me.

And you batted
those eyes at him?

I'm very grateful
for people like him

and friends like you
who I can turn to in a pinch.

You'd do the same for me.

[gasps]
Oh!

Voilà!

-Miracle worker.
-[laughs]

Looks like a match to me.

Right down to the vintage.

What about the picture frame?

Not even close.

All we need is
the glass in the frame.

It'll fit just
like the one you broke.

-I mean adjusted.
-Great.

Now, about that bow.

I'm afraid I trashed
the original one.

Let me work my magic on that

while you switch out
the glass in the frame.

Deal.

Oh. There we go.

It is a really good thing
that you disconnected

those security cameras
when you waltzed in here.

Your tracks should be covered.

Mostly, anyway.

Great. I need a nap.

Oh, you need to get it together

and fix things before
Bill and Hayley come back.

We've got time.

Hayley's probably still drooling

over those cliché
tourist attractions in Italy.

BILL:
Yes.

Okay. That works out perfectly.

All right.
Thank you.

What did you do?

Just pulled some strings.

Momentarily, we'll have
a police escort

just beyond the next exit.

Where we will find...?

-Helicopter transport.
-[gasps softly]

-How did you pull that off?
-[laughs]

Well, I represented
a city official

in a particularly embarrassing
lawsuit a few years back,

and I won, of course.

And he owed me a massive favor.

Oh, my goodness.

So...

-We'll be home real soon, okay?
-Mm.

-Thank you.
-Of course.

[sighs]

EVA: Hi, yes. This is Dr. Nicole
Richardson's assistant,

-and I'm calling from...
-Hey, hon.

Why are you trying
to get in touch

with that server from the gala?

Do you know she was fired
in the middle of the event?

No. But are you sure?

[doorbell rings]

I'll get that.

So the banquet manager
has already left for the day,

and his assistant doesn't have
access to the employee records.

But she's going to try
to reach him at home.

NICOLE:
Okay, that's great.

Hey, Aunt Nicole.

-Eva.
-Hey.

We weren't expecting you, Andre.

Yeah, I got the proofs
from the gala.

Oh, they look spectacular.

-That's wonderful.
-Yeah.

Uh, I thought
you were gonna have

a messenger bring them by,
though.

Um, I was, but, um,

I realized that I'd be
in the neighborhood,

so I figured I would
bring them anyway.

Uh, it was no trouble.

Unless...

did I interrupt something?

No, of course not.
And thank you for these.

Um, Nicole, while you're
looking over the photos,

I can finalize
your schedule for tomorrow.

Oh, you don't have to do that
this evening.

It's getting late.

I kind of want
to wait around anyway

to see if we hear anything back
from the banquet manager.

Okay. Thanks.

-[phone vibrates]
-I'm sorry. I need to get this.

Well, Andre, now that we have
the room to ourselves,

would you like to tell me
the real reason

you came by here tonight?

[chuckles]
To bring you the pictures.

Try that on somebody
that doesn't know you

as well as I do.

Something is going on with you,

so you might as well
just tell me what it is.

ASHLEY:
Here we go.

Why are we at your place
instead of mine?

You think I trust your roommates
to take care of you?

The guys are okay.

They park me
in my favorite chair

with pizza and beer.

Right, which is why
you're staying right here

where I can look after you

until I think you're ready
to be on your own.

Ash, I'm fine.

I don't need to be babied.

A building fell
on top of you, Derek.

And this isn't babying.

-Look, I'm not complaining.
-Really?

'Cause it kind of sounds
like you are.

No way.

-I love your TLC.
-Good.

'Cause I like giving it.

Look,

we're two years into this thing
that we're doing,

and I think
it's going pretty well.

That plan we laid out
for ourselves is

really coming together.

I was thinking the same thing.

I like the way things
are going very much.

Then maybe don't fight me

when I try to show you
how much you mean to me.

Maybe just relax and enjoy it
when I want to show you

how grateful I am
that you're here.

And I'm here.

And we're here.

Together.

Let me get you
something to drink.

Wait, what are my choices?

Water, milk, apple juice?

How about a beer?

-Best girlfriend ever.
-Okay, wait.

Don't get too excited.
It's the nonalcoholic type.

But Jacob swears it tastes
like the real thing.

Maybe second best
girlfriend ever? [chuckles]

[exhales]
Boy.

Hey.

I could have sworn

I set the security code
before we left, babe.

You just feel safe
behind these gates. [chuckles]

-Italy is beautiful...
-Mm.

...but I love it here, Bill.

Let me put these bags away
so we can get settled in.

Okay. After all that,
I could use another drink.

-Want one?
-Yes, please. Thank you.

What the hell?

BILL:
Hayley?

I never liked plain water.

I bet that's the smartest thing

you've put
in your system all day.

With that and the aspirin,
when you wake up tomorrow,

you won't have the slightest
trace of a hangover.

I owe you, Pamela.
You saved my skin today.

If you hadn't have panicked,

you would have been able
to handle it all on your own.

You nixed my nap
and got us out ASAP

even though Bill and Hayley
are thousands of miles away.

So smart to get it done
and me out of there.

I wasn't in my right mind.

Just do me a favor.

If Bill and Hayley
ever figure out

that you busted
into their place,

leave my name out of it.

I would never use your name
as an accessory.

I might need you to bail me out.

What is it? What...?

I don't get it, babe.
What's wrong?

This photo.

I already thought
it was weird at first

because it wasn't
where I put it.

I left it over there before,

but then I just found it
here on the mantel.

Okay.

And then when I picked it up
and looked... See?

There's a deep scratch
in the middle of the photo.

It wasn't there before.
I'm sure of it.

Okay. [chuckles]
Babe, I see the scratch,

but how could it have
gotten there?

Unless the glass broke somehow.

But the glass isn't broken.

This just doesn't
make any sense.

Okay, look, I have an idea.

Why don't we open this,
and we can pour ourselves

some superb wine
and just relax, babe, okay?

We're just edgy
from a long flight.

We spent forever in traffic.

When you're tired,
everything looks like a problem.

-Maybe you're right.
-Yeah.

You know? Tell you what.

We'll get a new one printed up
to replace this one.

It was probably just a defect
that we didn't notice before.

But in the meantime,

a glass of 1992 Château
de La Colère will go down nicely

right about now.

Wait, Bill, stop.

Babe, what is it, huh?
Did the bottle move, too?

No, but there was
a beautiful inscription

engraved on the back, remember?

Celebrating us.

It's not there anymore.

You see that?

No sign of an inscription

that made it
such a special gift.

Look, Bill, this isn't
tiredness talking.

Something is wrong.

Yeah, you're right.

Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?

The alarm was off...

The scratched picture...

The bottle of wine
obviously replaced...

BOTH:
Dani.

That b*tch broke in here.

She invaded our home.

I'm gonna find her.

She's gonna wish
she was never born.

No.

She's mine.

Yeah.

If you hate it, I will run out
and get you the real thing.

It wouldn't exactly necessarily
not be good for you.

-Maybe.
-Ash.

I don't deserve a beer.

I haven't been
appropriately grateful

for all the love and affection
you've been throwing my way.

Don't make a fuss.

I like taking care of people.

Hello? Nurse.

Yeah, but a fuss is
what you deserve.

And I want to make sure I'm not
sending you the wrong signal.

I'm the luckiest guy
in the world

because I found you.

And I never want you to doubt
my feelings for you.

I don't.

Good.

And all your loving,
all your caring,

pour it all on me.

Every drop.
I can't get enough of it.

And you're 100% right
about our plan.

It's right on track.
And I love where it's going.

Almost as much as I love you.

Just know that you don't have
to run into a burning building

to motivate me to show
my love for you.

Are you sure?

Because with my job,

-I have plenty of opportunities.
-Absolutely sure.

If you ever want
more of my attention,

all you have to do is...

That.

[chuckles softly]

We both know
that you didn't have

to bring these pictures
over here tonight.

They're just a handy excuse,
weren't they?

[scoffs] Auntie?
Are you trying to shrink me?

No. But now Auntie knows
she's right.

Do you remember
that conversation we had

before you became
a professional photographer?

You were worried you were
making a mistake.

I practically had to pull it out
of you with dental instruments.

But we both knew
that you needed to talk it out.

So what is it this time?

It's Ashley.

Haven't we already talked about
your leanings towards Ashley

and how you should resist them?

Yeah, I know, but I...

I wanted to...

I-I thought--
I thought about kissing her.

Actually, I almost did.

-Andre.
-Almost.

Fortunately, she pulled back
at the last minute.

Thank goodness.

Yeah, but she knew
what I wanted to do.

-And now she's angry.
-And she has the right to be.

I'm just afraid to think
what would have happened

if I would have actually
gone through with that.

I hope you're not here trying
to get permission to pursue her

because you're not gonna
get it from me.

I know.

Ashley is deeply in love
with Derek and vice versa.

And I know you know that
because you have eyes.

I know that.

But what I don't get is

where are all these crazy
attractions coming from?

I knew Ashley long before

she ever got together
with Derek.

And the idea of making a move on
her never even occurred to me.

So, why now,

when she's with somebody
do I have this, this urge to...?

Where does that come from?

That's not me.
That-- I don't

typically go for girls
who already are attached.

[sighs]

And I can't figure out
why I did it this time.

Or nearly did it.

I think this is why
you really came here tonight.

You need someone to tell you

you need to stay away
from Ashley.

No matter what impulse
you're feeling,

you know they're wrong.

Besides, there are
plenty of women out there

besides Ashley.

Yeah, there's no shortage

of pretty ladies,
that's for sure.

Why don't you stay a bit,
join us for dinner.

No, thanks.

I've already interrupted
enough of your night.

You are never an interruption.

[chuckles]

Thank you, but...

you gave me the kick
in the butt that I need,

and I'm over it.

[chuckling]

Thanks, Auntie.

All right, I'll let myself out.

[relieved sigh]

Andre leave?

Is everything okay with him?

Yeah, he just needed to get
something off his chest.

Well, he came to
the right place for that.

Actually, there's something else
that I need to talk about.

Of course.

Let me just finish up with Eva

and track down this server.

No, Nicole,
you need to let that go.

-Excuse me?
-If that woman needs help,

she needs to get it
somewhere else.

NICOLE:
She absolutely needs help, Ted.

She didn't just

happen to get a job at a gala

that I was being honored at.

Like Freud said,
there are no coincidences.

You're right.
There are no coincidences.

But that's why you need to stay
far away from that woman.

Hayley.

I know it's impolite
to just drop by,

but I wanted you to be
the first to know

that Bill and I are back.

One of his cases went
into overdrive,

and he's just crushed.

He had to cut
our honeymoon short

after promising me
the trip of a lifetime.

But I don't have to tell you.

You were married to him
long enough.

Yes, I was.

So here we are, home again.

We landed just
a little bit ago, actually.

And I figured you'd rather
I tell you personally

instead of running
into each other on the street.

No one likes
a rude surprise, am I right?

-I don't know anyone who does.
-Hmm.

Hayley, is this
the only reason--?

That I came by?

Actually, there is
one other thing.

Oh, wow.

You were really something.

Thank you. It meant a lot
to get that cover.

Oh, well.

-Hey!
-Oops.

What is going on? Are you crazy?

One of us sure as hell is.

And the crazy ends now,
if you know what's good for you.

I know you were
in my house, b*tch.

I know you drank our wine,

and I know you smashed
our wedding photo.

You violated my space.

You found your way in
in that entitled,

petty way that you have
because you are

just so obsessed

with the life
that Bill and I are making

that you just can't stay away.

But you need to do that.

Stay away, Dani.

Stay far away
and stop dwelling on us.

You know,
it's only making you look

like the pathetic witch
that you are.

And all it did was bring us
to the breaking point.

You and Bill?

Mybreaking point.

If you don't leave us alone,

I will get a restraining
order against you.

And if you violate it,

I will have your a*s
thrown in jail

and the charges
won't be dropped.

You might have started
on a high ground,

painting me as the home-wrecker,

but you violating my home,

invading it,

and destroying my things,

that makes you
the villain, Dani.

Yeah, and then
everyone will see you

for the wack-job
that you really are.

I don't know what
you're talking about.

-Mm.
-If you have evidence

of these alleged actions,
please, let's have it.

Otherwise, it's just
a steaming load of crap

like your pathetic marriage.

You can deny it all you want,
but we both know the truth.

Don't try me again, Dani.

You don't want to see
what happens when you do.

Bye now.

Damn it.

Hey. It's that time again.

You know where I am.

[scoffs]

Dinner, everyone.

Hurry, before it gets cold.

[clears throat]
Tyrell.

Is there something
you want to talk about?

We talked to Samantha
about dating,

but we never got around to
what was going on with our son.

-I'm fine.
-SMITTY: Really?

You've always been quiet,

but you've been keeping
to yourself

a little more lately.

Except for those secret looks
with your sister

that you don't think we notice.

'Cause she wanted me to push
the whole dating thing.

Is that it? Are you sure?

SMITTY:
I remember what it was like

when I was your age,

and I wanted...

wanted help with things,
but I didn't want to ask.

Dad, I can handle it.

Handle what?

I'm having problems
with calculus.

I'm getting
through them, though.

You see? I told you.
Nothing major.

Now we can eat

because starving the boy
won't help anyone.

[sighs]

NICOLE:
Would you care to explain

why you're trying to tell me
what to do?

TED:
What I mean is,

she made you come up
to the hospital roof.

She only wanted to talk to you.

So if she came
to the gala on purpose,

she wanted something more
from you.

Agreed. Which is why
I need to find her.

Look, Nicole,

what I'm trying to say is
this lady is fixated on you.

I'm no psychiatrist,
but I don't think

the right thing to do is
for you to treat her.

I mean, you're not wrong

if I'm part of her problem
in some way.

The thing is, Sherry needs help

and I don't think
she's getting it.

TED:
Whatever the situation,

I think we both know

and agree

that you're the wrong one
to treat her.

I'm sorry for coming on
so strong.

I just wanted to protect you.

I appreciate that.

Are you sure you're okay?

You've been through a lot
the past couple of days.

Are you checking to see
if I'm strong enough?

Just try me.

Thanks for staying so late, Eva.

Nicole values your time
and dedication.

-I'd do anything for her.
-Good. Good.

Oh, by the way,

you don't have to worry
about looking

for that woman
from the gala again.

Nicole has decided
it's best to just...

let that go.

Oh, if that's what Nicole wants.

Thanks.

[scoffs]

[phone vibrating]

Hey.

Are you okay?

-I was starting to get worried.
-Oh.

You had nothing to worry about.

And I'm glad you didn't try
to follow me.

I had no problem
tearing Dani a new one.

Oh, Lord.

We can breathe easy.

Your evil ex won't be
bothering us anymore.

Oh...
Who is this woman before me?

She bears little resemblance
to my polite little wife.

Oh, I'm the same woman
that you married.

-Mm-hmm.
-I'm just done.

And you know what?
I think you would be

proud of me because
I've just been taking it

and taking it in the name
of making peace.

But tonight,
I stood up for myself,

for the both of us.

-[chuckling]
-Mm-hmm.

You know what?
I am proud of you.

And I am more than ready
to be done with all of this.

You know what?
No more getting back at Dani

for all the things
that she's done.

Forget about her, right?

We got better things to do

and a life to build together.

[both laughing, moaning]

Mm.

[pop music playing]

I checked the time.

It's "never again" already.

-So it is.
-Yeah.

You want something to drink?

Uh, sure.

What do you want?

Surprise me.

♪ ♪

Damn buttons.

Bad day?

[sighs]

Yeah, to put it mildly.

You?

Well...

It was an adventure.

You want to talk about it?

-No.
-[scoffs]

No, I do not.

[sighs]

♪ ♪