01x01 - SheZow Happens // Cold Finger

[bunniefuu]

♪ [theme music plays] ♪

[Guy] Woo hoo! Yeah!

Hey, Maz, check this out.

Hahaha! Whoo hoo!

Oh, yeah! Cool trick, Guy.

What do you call it?

A Guy thing.

Whoo! Hooo!

[both laughing]

Those boxes go upstairs.

- [man 1] No problem.
- Those go in the kitchen.

- [man 2] Yep.
- Watch the walls.

Wipe your feet.
Don't break anything.

[Guy and Maz laughing]

Guy! Mom said you'd
help me unpack!

Can't you do the girly
unpacking yourself, Kelly?

I'm right in the middle of
an important board meeting.

Get it? Board meeting?

It's good, right? Whoa!

- [Kelly snarls]
- Board meeting adjourned.

Catch ya later, Maz.

Hop to it, Guy!

We also need to
organize the basement!

I'm coming already.

[sighs]

Nice digs.

Yeah. They inherited
the old place

from their Aunt Agnes.

Wish I had an Aunt Agnes.

- [clatter]
- What are you doing?

Organizing.

Be careful, that was
Aunt Agnes's lamp!

[clatter]

That was Aunt Agnes's
good china!

That was Aunt Agnes!

[both]
Ooooh! Aaaah!

Guy, do you know what this is?

Eeeh, Aunt Agnes's tacky ring

that she keeps hidden
in the wall?

[excited] Yes, and do you know
what that makes her?

Eeeh. Crazy?

No! It makes Aunt Agnes...

SheZow!

Oh, my goddess.

I have dreamed of being
SheZow my whole life

and now I, Kelly Hamdon

will carry on
our family's super legacy.

Give me that.

- Hey!
- Aunt Agnes was not SheZow.

[Kelly moans]

I'm so sure.

[girly voice] My name is SheZow.

My fists go pow pow.

I'm here to save the world.
You go girl!

[laughs hysterically]

Ha ha.
Yeah, that was good, huh.

I'll let you be the judge.

Whoa! What happened?

The ring turned you into SheZow!

I am not SheZow.

[manly voice] I'm-- I'm a dude!

Well, now dude look like a lady.

Here. You can have the
dumb ring back.

[grunts]

It's stuck.
Help me get it off!

It can't come off.

Say what?

SheZow legend
clearly states that

whoever shall
weareth the ring

shall forever bare the
responsibility of SheZow.

[screams] Nooooooooooooooo!

[Guy's scream echoing]

Whoa.

Wha...?

Shut the front door.

[electronic beeping]

[disgruntled sigh]

Afternoon, SheZow...

Wow!

Wait a minute.

[electronic beeping]

You're not Agnes Monroe.

And... you smell funny.

No. My name's Guy Ham--

I'm aware of your identity.

I know everything.

Of course. You're Sheila.

SheZow's super computer.

It's an honor to meet you,
your digital dynamicness.

I'm sure it is.

- [alarm sounding]
- Shemergency. Shemergency.

The Pushy Pirate Posse is
approaching Megadale.

Really?

What are they up to
this time?

The usual.

Snatching up Megadale's
most valuable booty.

Hahaha! She said booty.

Are you ready to kick some,
SheZow?

Me?

Unfortunately.

- No.
- Yes.

No!

[engine roars]

Okay.

Hold onto your seat!

[angry] If I grip it
any tighter,

I'll get a cramp in my cheeks.

[Guy] Who hoo!

Yes!

[Kelly] This is awesome!

Let's see what this
Shehicle can really do.

Wow, you're a really
good driver, Guy.

I mean SheZow.

Who I should have been.

Ooh, bitter much?

You know what, girlfriend.

I think you need to
test out your powers

before you battle
Pushy Pirates.

Don't you?

Yeah, lets.

SheZow!

Water tower,
this is SheZow

ready for a fantastic take off.

Yes! I can fly!

This is totally
amaaaaaaaaaaa-- [panicked]

Zing!

SheZow can't fly!

Brat.

Gotcha.

Ha ha. She-larious.

Super strength. Check.

[excited] Sweet!

Boomerang Brush.

Check.

[cheering]

Super speed.

Check

Whoa! Whoa!

I'm okay.

Huh?

Whoa! What's wrong?
Girdle too tight?

We gotta go find dad.

Somewhere deep inside me I can
sense he needs help.

Course you can.
SheZow has She-S-P.

Ha ha. It kinda tickles.

Yeah. It's like being psychic.
You just know things.

Uh huh. Too bad it didn't work
when you told me I could fly.

[Kelly laughs]

High Tail it, Poopsy! It's
the Pushy Pirate Posse!

We're the Pushy Pirate Posse,
yo the P.P.P.

We like to steal expensive stuff
cause then it's free.

Such a bargain.

Get the dog's jewels.
And his too.

Back you barbarians!

Help! Someone!

Where are the police?

Right here, Lady!

[sighs]

[grunting]

Get him, Boxter. Right.
Then a left.

Oh, dear.

[Sheila] Come in, SheZow. Hello?

Sheila? Is that you?

Expecting someone else?

[Kelly] Aah!

Holy Ship of fools!

[both] Whoa!

Look, it's Dad!

Hey dad, over here--

Oh, great, it's She-Cow, comin'
to steal all the glory again!

That's right. Dad hates SheZow.
I mean me.

I mean SheZow.
I mean--

Look out!

[both scream]

Weeeeee!

[scared gasps]

Arrr! Abandon ship!

[grunting]

Better get the pirate scooper
and clean up after She-Plow.

Regular? Or SheZow brand?

[sighs]

Whoa, she-mazing.

The Shehicle
can turn into a super submarine?

And a supersonic jet
called the She-C-10.

Fun ride, huh?

[groans] Speaking of rides.

This dress is uncomfortable.

Are you gonna tell me how to
change back now or what?

SheZow!

Or what.

I'm telling you, Droosha,
she's a vigilante vixen.

That SheZow
needs to be--

[Guy] Thanked? Given a parade?

Come on, dad,
I saved the town.

I mean, SheZow, who I secretly
am not, saved the town.

[nervous chuckle]

I think she's fabulous.

So is your outfit, Guy.

Yeah, what's up
with the new look?

I was just cleaning
out my closet and--

It threw up on you?

[all laughing, except Guy]

[snorts]

I'd like to make a toast.

To our lovely Aunt Agnes.

Although she is gone,

I feel like a little piece of
her spirit lives on

in each of us.

Yeah. Some of us
more than others.

- Whoaaa!
- [clatter]

[Kelly] May I be excused?

Aaah! Dude, we need to talk.

[laughing] This is she-larious!

It's just incon-she-vable!

Say it. Don't spray it.

[laughs and snorts]

You ready to change back now?

She-yeah.

Hey! How did you know those
were the magic words?

I don't know. I just guessed.

Wow, you're gonna
make a great SheZow.

[nervous laughter]

She-riffic.

[man] Are you dumb enough
to be on Butt Wipe?

This dude is!

If so, then send in
your video

because the sickest one...

...will appear on TV's Butt Wipe

and the winner will receive

a lifetime supply
of Senor Blowtada's

Loco Spicy Hot Chipadillas!
Youch!

Are you dumb enough?

The only thing dumber
is your question.

[sighs]

- Camera?
- Check.

- Goggles?
- Check.

Synchronize watches.

Che--
Oh. Ah.

I'm not wearing one.

Me neither. Then we're
perfectly in sync.

Let's do this.

[shouts] Release The Marbles!

Yeah!

[both scream in panic]

[scared screams]

[all] Ta-dam!

Dude, we got so lucky.

I know! Our video's totally
gonna win Butt Wipe!

I meant that our trick didn't
hurt a bunch of old people.

Oh, yeah, that too.

[panting] Guy!
Where have you been?

We're almost late.

For what?

[announcer] Welcome
to SheZow Con,

the ultimate SheZow convention.

Today Only!

Ha! Check me out.
I'm a she-lebrity.

Too bad I'm not going.

Oh, yes you are!

Auu!

As President of the
SheZow Fan Club

[angrily] I will not let
your laziness

ruin the she-lustrious
name of SheZow!

Especially since
you're just scared.

[laughs and snorts]

What? I'm not scared
of anything.

[Kelly and Maz laughing]

Okay, I'm scared.
They're gonna ask me a bunch of

SheZowy questions
I don't know the answers to.

It'll be like a test.

And I'm not good at tests that
I don't know the answers to.

Dude, you're not good at tests

you do know the answers to.

Exactly.

That's why I've devised an
ingenious, brother-proof plan!

Hey!

Sheila's gonna feed you the
answers through this earpiece.

Cool that! SheZow Con,
come to papa.

Don't you mean mama?

Depends on what I'm wearing.

[maliciously] Ice so badly want
to take her out.

And I don't
mean on a date.

You're going down
today, SheZow.

Say hello to my little friend.

[evil laughter]

[Timmy's mum] You talking to
yourself in there again, Timmy?

[irate] Yes, mother,

I'm super-evil-villain,
that's what we do!

And my name's not
Timmy anymore!

It's Cold Finger!

[Timy’s mum] Yeah!
Sorry! I forgot!

Do you want some lunch?

We're having cold cuts!

Oooh! My favorite!

Wow, this is all for me?

Well kind of, it's for SheZow.

And her global allegiance of
eternally devoted fans.

- [Maz] And me.
- [both gasp]

Dude, what are you
supposed to be?

I'm your new sidekick.

I'm Meatier Man?

Clever!

With this suit, I can handle
any villainous threat...

[dogs growling]

Except that!

- [dogs barking and growling]
- [Maz screaming]

[Maz] I'm Okay!

You've got Q and A in
two minutes SheZow,

you'd better change.

Okay, but don't look.

Oh, brother.

You go, girl!

Welcome to SheZow Con!

As President of
the SheZow Fan Club,

I give you everyone's favorite
Glamazon Superhero

SheZow!

[cheering]

[grunts]

[girly voice] Wow, your warm
reception really

knocked me off my feet...

...literally.

Would anyone like to ask
SheZow a question?

Me! Me!

I have a question over here.

Right here! Right--

[Cold Finger clears throat]

In the Hair Curlers from Heck
issue of the SheZow comic book

it said that you were allergic
to custard

yet in that same story

you can clearly be seen
eating an eclair.

Care to explain?

[girly voice] No... B-- B-- Bu
will... try anyway..

Eeehm....

The eclair...

[crowd] Yeah?

[nervous giggle]

I-- I...

- Whoops!
- [beep]

- [noise in the earpiece]
- [Guy screams]

The eclair was cream filled!

The eclair was cream filled!

[crowd cheering]

Phew.

Hey. Over here.

Your go-go boots
are totally sick.

Are they made of leather
or vinyl?

They're a patented combination
of the two called...

linyl.

[girly voice] I don't believe in
plastic surgery.

Radioactive glitter.

[nervous giggle]
We're just friends.

Me! Pick me!

[Cold Finger clears throat]

Ooops, sorry, out of time.

No more questions.

[growls]

Ice so disagree.

[screaming]

Whoa! Dude, chill out.

You just froze my sis--
I mean my number one fan.

I used to be your
number one fan, SheZow.

At one time I was president of
the SheZow fan club.

What happened?

I don't know. I was
late on my dues or something.

There was a
big misunderstanding.

Well, maybe you'll
understand this.

[Ice Colds scream in anger]

[SheZow's powerful scream]

[grunts]

[Maz panting]

You're not gonna believe this,
but--

[whispers]

We did? Get out!

No, you get out, SheZow!

[screams]

[teeth chattering]

Cackling Evil Snowmen! Attack!

[evil laughter]

If you wanna get to SheZow,

you'll have to go
through Meatier Man!

What? Okay, Okay, Okay.
Time out.

Hold on, SheZow.
Who is this high-protein clown?

Everybody knows you
don't have a sidekick.

Well, I do today.

This is Meatier man.

He's my number two.

That's what he
smells like.

You are dead
meat, pork chop.

Eeeh?

Yes, attack!

- [evil laughter]
- [screaming]

[Maz] Whoaaa!

Oh, mo, my tuh ith thut
to the ice block.

Laser Lipstick!

Is that all you got, snow flake?

You look a little hot
under the collar, SheZow!

How about a nice cool breeze.

My hair.

Oh, mo! Whem yuh hai go limp
so go your powers!

Not a good idea

to tell the villain
my weakness, Meatier Man.

Sorry.

[evil laughter]

So, that's it, huh?
It's all about the hair.

[Sheila] Quick!

Use the She-lac hair spray
in your beautility belt!

Well then, how about

some frosted
highlights and a trim?

Hmmm.

[screams in anger]

Wow!

I'm totally She-vitalized!

Uh oh.

[screams]

[Sheila] Use the Heavy-Handed
Super She-Slap.

The Heavy-Handed
Super She-Slap?

Whoa.

[nervous giggle]

Mine’s bigger.

Wanna play paddy
cake, Ice Man?

The name's not Ice Man,
it's Cold Finger!

[screams]

Ice see how it is...

Now, SheZow, you will deal
with me and all the powers of.

Hello.

Yeah, can I have
two Chilerillas,

one Otter Plop and a Snappy
Sub Arctic Sundea, please?

Kind of in a hurry.

Here you go!

So good.

[grunts]

[gasps]

Chippadillas?

Don't worry,
they're on the house!

[moans]

Don't think you've defrosted
me for good, SheZow.

You haven't seen the
last of Cold Finger...

Yes! We did it!

We are totally awesome--

[Cold Finger] Seriously!
I mean it...

I'm starting to really dig this
superhero stuff.

[Cold finger] I'll be back!

- Is he gone?
- Think so.

Then gimme some glovin'.

[Maz] Aaah!

[clatter]

[Maz] I'm okay!

[man] This week's user-generated
video comes to us

from Guy Hamdon and
Maz Keppler of Megadale.

Dude, this is major!

We're beyond famous!

That's our video!

It was anyway.

Fix it! Quick!

I'm trying!
There's something horribly--

Oooh!

[angrily] More like H-2-OH!
Frozen solid!

With me in it!

What do you have to say
for yourself, Guy?

Ice to see you, Kelly.

[Maz laughs and grunts]

♪ [theme music plays] ♪