01x13 - What a Night for a Dark Knight!

[bunniefuu]

Let's see what's
come in the mail.

Bill, bill, bill.

Bill... What? A letter?

Who writes actual
letters anymore?

"Dear, Uncle Alfie,

"I can't believe it's been so
long since we've seen each other

"You were always my
favorite bonus uncle."

Oh, how charming!

Master Wayne, is that you?

What? No!

♪ Scooby-Dooby-Doo
and Guess Who?

♪ We know you're
one in a million

♪ Scooby-Doo

♪ We can count
on you, Scooby-Doo

♪ To catch and
unmask that villain ♪

Zoinks! It's, like, the Batman!

So, like, Daphne, tell us again,

why we're riding
down some creepy road

at night in the
middle of nowhere?

Yeah, creepy.

We've already told you guys.

We're going to
see Daphne's uncle.

I didn't know you had an uncle.

Well, he's not really my uncle,

-but he became an uncle.
-How? Magic?

-Married into the family?
-No, sillies.

He worked as our butler
one summer when I was little.

Wait! So, he was your butler?

No, more like a family friend

who also played on
Daddy's polo team.

So he was a polo player.

Substitute, really.
- Oh, okay. Okay, okay, okay.

So, he was your old butler...

Substitute polo player...

- Slash family friend...
- Sort of uncle, maybe?

Exactly.

Hold the phone.
Somebody's in a big hurry.

Whoa!

Jet-powered car!

-Cape and cowl!
-Gotham City plates!

Cold, dark and creepy!

- That was... - The Batman!

Wow, Daphne. This
is Wayne Manor.

You didn't tell us your uncle worked
for billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne.

Didn't I? It must
have slipped my mind.

Whoa, what the
heck happened here?

Oh, no! Looks like something
horrible crawled its way in.

Uncle Alfie?

Well, nobody's home.
Let's come back later.

Yeah, later. Like, never later.

Nothing doing, guys.

We've got a mystery on our hands

and we are going in.

I was afraid you
were gonna say that.

Uncle Alfie? Alfred.

Mr. Pennyworth!

Something very
bad happened here.

Look! My letter to Uncle Alfie.

Swanky!

Scooby-Doo, catch, boy!

Uh... Uh-oh.

Whoa! Zoinks!

Run, Scoob!

Mr. Pennyworth!

Oh! Huh, that's kooky.

I wonder what this button does.

Whoa-whoa-whoa!

Shaggy.

Lipstick.

What's lipstick doing

in a billionaire
bachelor's mansion?

Hmm?

What're you doing here?

-Run. -Like run, Scoob. Run.

Whoa!

Who sent you?

What have you done with Alfred?

Zoinks! It's, like, the Batman.

He came out of nowhere and he was, like,


He's like, "What
are you doing here?"

And Shaggy and I
were like, "Ahhh!"

And we ran away, but he
was, like, flying in front of us.

And he came in front of us
and he said, "Who sent you?"

And Shaggy and I
were like, "Ahhh!" again.

And we ran back
and he was there, too.

And he was flying in
front of us the whole time

and he was right and
he had this big cape,

and he was like a giant
bat. And then he was like...

And he was like,
"I am the night.

"I am Batman. Batman."

Velma? Daphne? Fred?

You missed.

Oh? Oh...

What did you do with Alfred?

We didn't do anything with
Mr. Pennyworth. Honest.

We came here to visit him.

He's Daphne's uncle not
uncle butler once removed.

Maybe.

Besides, Mr. Batman,
you have this all wrong.

We're mystery
solvers just like you.

You have to trust us.

Trust, doesn't come
easily in my line of work.

Oh!

Ooh, that tickles.

You're right. These don't match
the claw marks in the ding room.

Huh?

Phew!

But what are you doing here?

How do you know Alfred?

Well, I... I heard there
was a break-in here.

Yeah, but if you were on your
way here when you passed us,

how did we get here first?

And where'd you
park the Batmobile?

I... I...

Look, I think it's time you
kids were on your way back

to wherever it is you came from.

We are not leaving until
we get some answers.

Whoa! Jeepers!

Oh, what happened?

-Batman did this to us. -Yeah.

- Poor Uncle Alfie. - Hmm.

It's not blood and it's not ink.

Lipstick?

-Scoob and I found this.
-Does it help?

It matches!

This is an amazing clue.

This lipstick is Valentine
Tears number 5.

I thought I had
the very last one.

Hmm. Only one
store in Gotham City

ever sold that brand,

and it closed down
over 50 years ago

and has been
abandoned ever since.

Spooky abandoned
department store

in the middle of the night

in one of the toughest
towns like ever.

Yeah, like, let's go there.

That's the spirit,
Shaggy. Let's hit it!

One of these days, Scoob,
I'm gonna have to teach

-Freddy the meaning of sarcasm.
-Yeah.

What's sarcasm?

Boy, this place sure
gives new meaning

to haunt couture.

Huh?

It's a fashion joke.

This lipstick definitely
came from here.

No sense letting
these go to waste.

That means whoever was in
Wayne Manor has been here.

And maybe they still are. Look!

This is great! Let's split
up and look for clues.

I would now like to state
my optional fussness

and objectifyingly state,

splitting up never
ends well for any of us,

-especially me and Scoob. -Yeah.

Great. You, Scoob and
Velma take the upstairs.

Daphne and I will
take the basement.

He never listens.

Huh?

A monkey with cymbals

and he clanged on my nose
like this, clang, clang, clang!

Shh! Quiet, Scooby,
I hear something.

That's the sound of a 4TS
processor fan working overtime.

Well, well, well,
what have we here?

This laptop is working

to hack into Bruce
Wayne's bank accounts.

Boys, this mystery is really
starting to come together.

Time to call Batman.

-Call Batman?
-Like, just call him?

Who is this?

Hey, Batman, it's me
Velma. Velma Dinkley.

How did you get this number?

Oh, I hacked it
off your utility belt

when you were threatening
Shaggy and Scooby earlier.

-Hmm. -Respect, V. Respect.

Look, we've made a crazy
discovery in this mystery.

Do you know Bruce Wayne?

You know, that dude who's
crazy super rich and stuff?

Uh, yes. I am familiar
with Mr. Wayne.

Well, someone is trying to
hack into his bank accounts

using a sophisticated
algorithm to crack his password.

Maybe it has to do with
Mr. Pennyworth's abduction.

I'm sending you a pic now.

Ms. Dinkley, I'm not sure
what you've discovered,

but my investigation

has led me to
Dr. Kirk Langstrom.

The claw measurements
at Wayne Manor

match the Man-Bat.

Oh, I have to put you
on hold for a moment.

Still here, Batman.

Still here.

Nope, you just gotta hang up.

Bat... Batman, if you hit... Press
the other... Press the other button.

Maybe if you
take your glove off.

Why wasn't I notified
that Langstrom escaped?

Langstrom? He didn't escape,
Mr. Batman, he's right here.

This can't be right.

No, wait, wait, wait. Don't go.

Okay, well... Thanks
for the visit, Batman.

Come back any time.

No, it can't be.

Ms. Dinkley, you were right.

I know who's behind this.

You do? That's great.

No, it's not.

You're in grave danger.
Get out of there. Now!

Now?

Ms. Dinkley? Velma?
Shaggy-haired hippy guy?

Talking dog...

I think we lost old
winged and creepy.

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

-Yikes! -Yikes!

Ahhh!

Shaggy? Scooby?

Phew.

I've lost my glasses.

You guys know I can't
see without my glasses.

Shaggy, is that you?

- Hold on, Velma. We are coming.

Oh, we are too late, Scoob.

She's gone.

Daph, I don't see how this is
gonna help us solve this mystery.

Don't be silly, Fred.

The real mystery here is how
all these amazing retro fashions

were left on the rack like this.

Such a waste.

Run!

-The Man-Bat... -He took Velma.

Well, that's it.

It's one thing for some Man-Bat
monster to take Daphne's old butler...

- Substitute polo player.
- Slash family friend.

Slash, sort of, uncle.

But it's quite another
for him to take Velma.

She's one of ours.

It's time to set a trap for
this Man-Bat once and for all.

Tell us everything
that happened.

Start at the beginning.

Well, there was this awful

shrieking and screeching
and howling. That was me.

And then, the Man-Bat

was all hissy, hissy, hissy...

And I was like...

And Shaggy was like, "No
way, dude. No way, dude."

And Velma was like,
"My glasses. My glasses."

And there was this running
and screaming and then,

and then, and then, the
Man-Bat broke my phone.

I've got an idea for a trap.

But, Scooby, I'm gonna
need you to be the bait.

Uh-uh, nothing doing.

Would you do it
for a Scooby snack?

-Nope. -Two Scooby snacks?

No way.

Five Scooby snacks?

- Three. - Done. Three.

Hmm.

Hey...

Hello, Mom, it's me
Scoobert. Just calling.

Um, out doing a little
shopping all by myself.

Helpless. Carrying a
whole bunch of cash

and totally all alone.

Oh. Oh.

Alone. Alone.

Did I mention defenseless?

Yikes!

Uh-oh.

He's here... Whoa!

Yikes!

Now, Daphne!

Oh, no! He went around it.

Now, Shaggy!

Yikes!

Yikes!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Ow!

Ahhh!

Daphne, behind you!

Jeepers!

Huh?

Huh?

Ahhh!

Huh?

Huh?

Not so fast, Man-Bat.

- We hosed him. - Oh, yeah!

Oh! Zoinks! That can't be good.

Oh! Oh!

Batman. You're so cool!

Now, let's see who
this Man-Bat really is.

Langstrom! That can't be right.

I saw him in his cell at Arkham.

Uncle Alfie?

Okay. This is
just getting silly.

Oh, you know it, Batsy.

The Joker?

Ooh, that's better.

All those masks were just so hot

and my face was
living in the tropics.

And not in a good way,
if you know what I mean.

Joker!

Just as I figured
from the evidence

that Velma sent me from
the computer upstairs.

Zoinks! Where is Velma, anyway?

Well, don't look at me, Shaggy.

These lips are sealed.

Unless I'm giggling.

Found them.

You see, the mystery
was really very simple.

The Joker posed as the Man-Bat

and he used an elaborate
system of pulleys, gears and wires,

and a bit of a controlled gliding
to make it appear he could fly.

And all this because he
wanted to get Alfred's passwords

to Bruce Wayne's bank account.

It was basically just a heist.

Not basically, sweater girl.

It was going to be one of
the biggest heists of all time.

Technically, it
was a kidnapping.

As I was saying, before
being so rudely interrupted,

I won't mention any names,
cough-cough, Batman,

cough-cough, I
need a lot of money

to fund all my great
escapades and capers.

I brought Alfred here
to help me access

Bruce Wayne's bank accounts.

He just need a
little persuasion.

And then, you horrible children

showed up and
spoiled everything.

I was so close to
having all that money.

And you know what?

I would have gotten
away with it, too,

if it weren't for you meddling
kids and your talking dog.

Oh, and Batman of course.

Well, at least that lipstick
clue totally makes sense now.

Oh, girlfriend, I
just love that shade!

As decadent as it is rare.

With your beautiful
hair and skin tones,

I have a few make-up
tips for you to try.

Oh, do share. Do share.

Oh, Uncle Alfie, I'm
so glad you're okay.

It's so good to see you again.

And I'm so glad you're,
like, making us dinner

'cause I'm, like, starving.

Oh, it's my pleasure,
Master Shaggy.

I only wish Master Wayne
were here to meet you, too.

The Man-Bat!

Scooby-Dooby-Doo!