01x02 - The Opening Act

[bunniefuu]

hey everybody here comes the swamp

Critters now we got a river boat captain

by the name of rib Le that's me and a

fiddle playing crab by the name of Gumbo

he show is something to see now we got

Big Al Gator on piano and we got Billy B

posum on the

Bas and raccoon on guitar and I'm a are

dancing all over the place and we'll be

rolling down the river traveling by the

Light of the

Moon rolling down the river going to

reach our destination

soon all the swamp Critters are picking

and a singing a

tune rocking and a reeling battle

Wheeling down the laws look

good yeah we'll be run in a reeling

paddle Wheeling down a lost

[Music]

Beaver in the Bayou

[Music]

Lagoon

[Music]

there's a fever in the

bou there's a fever going

down it's coming from the

music and it's spreading all

around it's swamp Critter music and it's

going to get a hold of

you you feel star moving and there's

nothing that you can

do CUA there's a fever in the swamp B

fever in the swamp you can feel it in

the

air the r of the

music and it's spreading

everywhere it's swamp Critter music and

it's coming to your

[Music]

neighborhood the beaver's going to get

you and it's going to make you feel so

good there's a fever in the

bou there's a beever going

down it's coming from the

music and it's spreading all

[Music]

around

[Music]

there's a fever in the swamp

Bo you can feel it in the

air it's the of the

music and it's breading

everywhere there's a fever in the fire

you

speed we're going

down from

the and it's spreading all

around there's a fever in the

[Music]

Big Al

bou boy now that sounds like a hit I

can't wait for everybody to hear it at

the show

tonight yeah son and if I'm going to

make it back in time for the show I

better get going I got to run some

supplies or would a Lighthouse Point

this

afternoon I'll go with you redbit I

could use a little

relaxation yeah son you must be plum

tuckered out the way you jump

around hello bumpkins take a look at the

new king of Show

Business what do you mean

fineas I me mean that I'm now a manager

and booking agent Bumpkin and that's why

I'm here Big Al now you swamp Critters

are doing okay for now but well you got

to give the audience something new every

once in a while or they'll stop coming

to your

Cafe stop coming to my

Cafe that's right Big Al but I got just

what you need to keep the folks coming

back

what you need is a comedian to open the

show you know kind of get him excited

and in a good mood before the swamp

fritters come

out a

comedian but well I never had a comedian

in my Cafe before suppose he's not

funny listen you big lizard fineas fat

rat only books top quality talent and I

got a comic that's coming here here

direct from the catskin mountains my

favorite

Resort why he'll slay these lost Lagoon

bumpkins they ain't never seen nothing

like shecky Dangerfield

Mouse shecky Dangerfield

Mouse that's right wiie Bob he's just

what the doctor ordered why he'll have

your audience in

stitches he'll slay the audience he'll

have him in stitches sounds sounds like

that's just what the doctor ordered all

right relax Big Al it's just an

expression now to show you how sure I am

I'm going to let shecky open the show

tonight free of charge then after the

crowd goes crazy over him we'll talk

about a weekly Sal is it a

deal boy Big Al I like a good joke as

good as the next Critter but well maybe

Shey should audition for

you

audition what's an

audition that's where he lets you see a

little bit of his show before you hire

him listen bumpkins shy Dangerfield

Mouse don't have to audition for nobody

he's played every Cafe from here to lost

wages now have we got a deal Big

Al well okay Phineas I guess he can open

his show for us

tonight well bumpkins you better wear a

seat belt tonight or you'll fall off

your seats

Dog House

[Music]

laughing uh you seem to be kind of down

in the dumps today Ry is anything

wrong yeah son something's wrong all

right I'm in the dog house again I was

standing by the pond winking at every

pretty girl I'd see and I turned around

and there was my girl staring right at

me I'm in the dog

house I'm in the dog house now that's

where I

am so throw me a bone boy I'm in the dog

house

now play your harmonica

[Music]

son

tonight will show be lonely I'll be

croaking a different tune I'll be

sitting on my pad and I'll be howling at

the moon I'm in the dog house I'm in the

dog housee

now

oh so move over

over I'm in the dog house

now that's where I am

River Queen

[Music]

son see Joe how about helping me out

with these crates

[Music]

now howdy Captain

Le well hello barbecue what brings you

down to the river

Queen oh I've just got a question

captain Lee and you're so smart in

everything how true my boy how true well

permission granted to come aboard son

just make yourself comfortable in the

cabin

there howdy Mr

Joe oh howdy

barbecue did you come to help us load

these

[Music]

crates help us

son now tell me barbecue what seemed to

be the

problem well it's not a problem captain

Lee it's just that well this morning my

dad was saying how he'd like to be in my

shoes and how I'm lucky to be a kid but

well I feel just the opposite I can't

wait to be all grown up maybe if I

wasn't in school maybe I could grow up

faster

uh-oh there you go again wishing you was

somebody else don't you remember when

you was wishing you was me why is it

that folks are never satisfied with who

they

are why don't we like who we

are and why do we wish on a

star wishing we could just be someone

else instead of being

ourselves

trying to be what we're

not well that's something you see quite

a

lot why does Dad say how great it would

be to trade places with

me why does the grass seem to

be greener for you than for

me and why why is it so hard to

see I'm much better off being

me that's something I never

knew and I've learned a lesson it's

true I guess we're much better by far

being just who we

are

why does the grass seem to

be greener for you than for

me and why is it so hard to

see I'm much better off being

me that some something I never

knew and I've learned a lesson it's

true I guess we're better by far just

who we

are I guess we're much better by far

being just who we

are

[Music]

you learned a valuable lesson barbecue

most kids want to try to grow up too

fast and well you need to take your time

growing up there's lots of things to

learn about the Big Swamp out there and

the best place to learn is in school it

makes old rib E Lee sad when I hear

about some kid leaving school oily

instead of finishing his

education that's right

barbecue every Critter needs his

education why if I didn't have an

education I wouldn't be able to do all

the different kinds of work that I

[Music]

do what kind of work do you do Mr

Joe uh well Joe ain't a real good

example barbecue truth is I had to loin

my navigational Pro proficiencies in

school otherwise I wouldn't be able to

negotiate all the toins on this

River what do all those big words mean

captain

Lee he means he wouldn't know how to

steer the river Queen if he didn't have

an

education I couldn't have said it better

myself

Son Well I want to be like you captain

Lee so I'm going to get my education see

y'all

later so long

barbecue see you later

son boy I'm plum tuckered out I don't

want to miss my afternoon

nap yeah son yesterday you slipt right

through

[Music]

Dangerfield Mouse

it

good evening friends and welcome to the

swamp Critters

show now tonight before the swamp

Critters perform big alows is proud to

present direct from the cat skinned

Mountains Resort the one and only shecky

danger F

Mouse

hey is this an audience or an ugly

convention

hey hey that table looks like a police

lineup That Frog's mouth is so big he

could eat a hot dog sideways

hey why

son hey over there is that an armadillo

or a tugboat

hey I didn't come here to be in s

it where do you usually go

hey where and

never hey if I look like that raccoon

I'd wear a mask too

hey I think he just insulted

me hey is that a possum or a throw rug

there

hey I was afraid of this Big

Al Hey that alligator's mouth is so big

when he yawns his face disappears

hey Phineas this guy is insulting

everybody in the cafe you got to do

something what do you mean you big

lizard this guy's a

riot and take that rat there please

somebody told me he was toofaced but

that can't be true or he'd surely be

using the other one

hey why you little no Talent rodent wait

till I get my hands on

you uh-oh well ladies and JS that's all

for theight

hey come out of there you little cheese

ball boy Big Al I was afraid of this

there's nothing funny about being

insulted if you got to make fun of

somebody to try to get a laugh well

you're not really funny at all we better

play something fast while we still have

an

audience and Now ladies and gentlemen

the swamp

Swamp Music

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

Critters

[Music]

there's a fever in the B

you there's a fever going

down it's coming from the

music and it's spreading all

around it's swamp Critter music and it's

going to get a hold to

you your feet are star moving and

nothing that you can

do cuz there's a fever in the swamp

fever in you can feel it in the

a the of the

music and it's spreading

everywhere it's swamp Critter music and

it's coming to your

[Music]

neighborhood the beaver's going to get

you and it's going to make you feel feel

so

good there's a fever in the

bou there's a fever going

down it's coming from the

music and it's spreading all

[Music]

around

[Music]

there's a fever in the Swamp Boy you can

feel it in the

air it's the rhym of the

music and it's breading everywhere

there fever in you

inever going

down coming from the

music and it's spring all

around there's a fever in the

[Music]

bou thank you friends thank you

now on behalf of Big Al I'd like to

apologize for Shey Dangerfield Mouse I'm

sure he's a real funny Critter without

having insult everybody I guess some

Critters just don't realize how much

words can hurt now some Critters are

just naturally funny but I guess there

are other Critters who can only get

attention by making fun of folks or

insulting them but here in Lost Lagoon

well Critters here don't like to insult

anyone or make fun of them in any way

you know the world would sure be a lot

nicer if every Critter would treat every

other Critter like a good friend C good

friends don't make fun of each other in

fact we've got a little song that kind

of tells how all of the swamp Critters

feel I once heard it said if someone

La La La

would write a song that the world could

sing along the world might be in

harmony

so I wrote a song the kind of song you

sing along with and the words are very

simple la la

[Music]

la it has a style to make you smile and

all the while the only words you have to

sing are la la

la and if you sing you'll find it brings

a lot of things the kind of things that

might make Critters get

along so what's to lose let's spread the

news don't refuse now everybody all

together sing

[Music]

along la la la la la la la la la la la

la la la la la la la la la la la

[Music]

[Music]

la so what to do let's spread the the

news don't refuse now everybody all

together sing

along the Melo it holds the key to

Harmony and all you have to sing is

simply la la

la and pretty soon they'll hear the tune

across the room and out the window let

the world hear la la la

then join your hands across the land

Strike Up the Band and who's to say the

whole wide world might sing

[Music]

along so what's to lose let's spread the

news don't refuse now everybody all

together Sing Along come on now

everybody la la la la la la la la la la

la la

[Music]

la

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

la la la

la la la la la la la la la la

so what's to lose let's spread the news

don't refuse now everybody all together

sing

along so what's to lose let's sprad the

news don't refuse now everybody all

together sing

[Music]

along big

[Music]

out now it ain't got much style and

grace but I have found there Ain no

place like

home not like my

home I'm talking about

lost lost

l it's a paradise beneath the bio

Moon well you can take away my

possession you can take away my money

too but don't take me away from L

foro take me away from

losto

[Music]

hey