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01x04 - Hat & Mouse

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Capitol Critters". Aired: January 28, 1992 – September 17, 1996.*
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A young mouse named Max is forced to flee his home on a farm in Nebraska after his family is k*lled by exterminators.

01x04 - Hat & Mouse

Post by bunniefuu »

can't believe this I mean back in

Nebraska we just got out in the field

and pick corn yeah sounds really

exciting our urine from the country life

max colic pass to city will be more

conducive to my writing

what are you right knuckle my name I

hope to be done soon Oh whoo what kind

of food do they keep in there

Billy beer hey they got tons of it

must've been on sale or song come on

this here is the fun part

hey everyone what asked us nobody wants

to be even a roaches como don't ever

believe they got diseases and stuff

what's happening to it

all up in either you let me down I'm

gonna start dropping hostages this is a

lace top I take you anyways

oh it's him let's go with only this

clown he couldn't pull his way check

please

right a mouse on a bear ken big deal

Thank You Patrick

some brand muffin good contribution

Lionel

without your health you're nothing it's

tempting I know some flavorless what an

inspired choice a from and they said

inbreeding was a mistake make sure you

guys meet me at the north gate there's a

lot of protest groups on Saturdays and I

don't want to get mixed up of course as

you dorks make it back we're a scratch

are you okay jam it do I look like I

don't write that lousy feed line

cornered they had Bush's bathroom down

the toilet what are you protesting this

week these are for the anti styrofoam

coalition there's a rally in a march to

the Capitol tomorrow I'm taking Maximo

along what is it with you all day long

all you do is pick a dance protest that

this may come as a surprise to you but

some German work for a living

wanna be a trying to call area

scum all again hey man chill it besides

you'd wanna wear it after you punched it

wait a sec I know that guy

looks like you picked the wrong time to

see the world

buggy boy hey remember me you carried me

out when the smokers came okay going

but listen anytime I can ever do a favor

for you get away from squid we got some

stopping bindle you mean you guys want

to hurt him he saved my life

come on can't beat it we got no hassle

with you but he didn't do anything to

you I said get away from him

No

you alright you did but you all right

what are you some kind of wacko you want

to fight on his side

I don't want to fight on anybody's side

what's fighting gonna prove you really

think it's gonna solve your problems we

didn't have any problems you came along

you don't know a lot about you know Ivan

maybe King where your a*s around here

but Jarrett they were about to anyway I

got a couple of million vines over at my

place

hello bags I just caught them come on

what do you think yeah whatever

they weren't squat anyway let's get out

of here you you owe me your life you are

my sleep Oh what are you looking at go

back to your old freaking neighborhood

I like this place because of my kids

gold up here I can't believe they

treated you like that yeah those guys

were the Democrats look I hear there's a

dumbass I found it upstairs

thanks sir I'm max it Janet I'm Moe's

I'm also out of here but wait

what is the matter which is anyway you

were even here a week then you taking

sides with a book

jamot if it wasn't for him I might have

suffocated ye well if it wasn't for me

suffocating would have been the lethea

problems do I have to get those ghouls

to bail you out

this was a perfectly good nothing wrong

and you know it is garbage look I just

don't understand why they were pushing

him around like that he's a good guy

he's a six-legged germ-infested lowlife

bum and one more thing no more search

and rescues for me you got it from now

on if you get into trouble you're gonna

stay there

and they kept calling him buggy boy like

that many was supposed to be stupid or

not as good as them I've got a flash

them back and then they were gonna pull

his legs off muggle I mean back home

nobody would ever treat somebody like

that or call me

what do you say can you just do that for

as long as you want

well I wouldn't want to try for more

than a day or two hey the chef left a

little surprise tonight

oh boy they're gonna like this at all

Roach poison dudes laid out perfect see

they come right through this space every

night gonna get nine of ten them before

they rise up don't touch that it's

sticking of flypaper man that's a tin

ailable okay we have nothing to fear but

but panic and death something like that

is it that you drive too fast I said

you're gonna k*ll somebody I said did

you listen it's a red mouse mouse six

more inches you would have been cream of

it sorry

that reminds me I'm hungry any money I

don't know where do you want to eat how

about under the sink

I'm sick of under the sink maybe the

toilet toilet smileth every time be

going there seven times under lights and

me run away lights on we run away lights

off if we come back please

hi Mose is that you hello

ah what are you doing here I here to get

a nice Club Med what do you think I'm

doing here dirt brain now follow me and

this is definitely the last time I

Bailey's out wait what about the poison

somebody's gotta warn these guys huh hey

bags poison in the kitchen be cool happy

come on

I hope you know the way out because I

got lost a little weight everywhere

well what do you know Fuzzy's what about

it you can't find your way all rat-faced

go Bobby till you Jeep jam it he's

bigger than you are

Wow now what we gotta do is get this but

everything go don't know your speed the

puddles are dead giveaway it looks like

somebody's gonna get cut tonight no

please

you back off when in a rotten fuzzy ever

do for you so that makes it right now 60

million years we've been on this planet

60 million and we never started proble

with nobody that you want to change that

now you really want to be the first

let's go it smells in here

man they bought that you were lying are

you been here 60 million years I know

who we started trouble with whoa that

was close

caught him close Thanks what you

thanking me for only reason you ain't it

doesn't because you owe me your life you

are my sl*ve I owe you

problem can you believe these people the

styrofoam coalition was picketing on

that corner and everything is fine till

this Procera phone coalition began that

corner first they started swinging

poison yeah yeah that's why we came down

here we wanted to warn you

what is this week everybody was just

trying to like you to these two if you

touch a roach you get sick and died oh

yeah coming from a sewer rat to say

insult hey the sewer is an operating

room compared to this place I've heard

plenty about you guys then you take a

class or something when you got that

Yale scholarship yeah it was school scum

one or anything about me you do like

your breath is surprisingly fresh while

I am talking to you just take a hi guy

we got enough fools about old out here

hey Gandhi I thought it over I do want

to be the first one

that's stealing that's darling it's

borrowing

jamot the batteries loose

don't look at me

oh man I've been that fine whoever

hearing my cam it look like knees up to

the soon

you guys go ahead I'll stop the mouse

just doing better than is

I guess not

German German get up this way

need a hand

now we got us a whole bunch of them to

play dolls what you gonna do about it

I guess we better skip the March huh

there isn't one watch that you busy

beating each other's brains out

that doesn't do it for global warming

doesn't

yeah old man you found us

where's everybody else back there the

roaches ran into the rats they're

fighting each other most and I don't

even think they know why they don't

that's why they fighting so hard can you

swim

yeah why stand up quick and hold on to

get real good Mose what's happening now

whatever you do don't wanna by just hang

tight

I thought it over and I decided I wanted

to force thanks for helping me get home

Mo's I think Jam it's still kind of mad

at me oh yeah mad at you man he just mad

that's the way he is I guess you've got

some guys like that where you live - oh

you noticed that well huh this is it

uh-huh it was a slice man thanks for

showing me around thanks for thinking

about us we'll skip the kitchen tonight

oh my hat where'd you find it

right near my crib I can't pick up after

you forever you know where I grew up

they said if you leave something behind

like a hat it means you want to come

back someday probably sounds pretty

stupid to you let me just think about

that yeah it's pretty stupid you'd be

good at homie take care of Mose

hey yo Holmes what up