- [KIDS LAUGHING]
- PEACEMAKER: Right, kids?
And that's how I defeated Kite Man.
- Any questions?
- ♪ [UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- Yeah, Canadian tuxedo.
- Do you have a pet?
I do have a pet.
That's a great question.
I have a pet named Eagly. He's an eagle.
Do you have a origin story?
Let's go. Bets right here.
Let's go. Let your money talk.
- ♪ [PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- [SPECTATORS CHEERING]
You dumb f*ck, you k*lled your brother!
[ECHOING] You k*lled
your brother, you piece of sh*t!
PEACEMAKER: [READING PROMPT]
Truth is, I'm supposed to be in prison.
- For what?
- Superhero sh*t.
- What superhero are you?
- Peacemaker.
- What were you in prison for?
- Integrity.
I made a vow to have peace,
no matter how many people
I have to k*ll to get it.
♪ [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
VIGILANTE: Your dad's
White Dragon costume, right?
How is it so big in this place?
It's a quantum unfolding storage area.
It leads to a dimensional nodule
outside normal space.
Well, I guess your dad's
pretty brainy for a r*cist.
And if your dad's a r*cist
and you work with him...
I don't work with him!
He makes me stuff!
AUGGIE SMITH: I hesitate
giving you any helmet
as big a simp as you turned out to be.
[GRUNTS, GROANS]
You know you don't have
to call me Peacemaker.
You can call me Chris.
I have no interest in you
other than your ability to fight for us.
VIGILANTE: I thought
you were in prison for life.
How did you get out anyway?
I work for the government, okay?
- VIGILANTE: Post office?
- PEACEMAKER: Dude.
I k*ll people for them, okay?
VIGILANTE: Huh? Sick.
Eat peace, m*therf*ckers!
You know, lately I'm just
thinking I'm a f*cking maniac.
Like, I don't know, I'm having
feelings about things that...
I don't think Chris is ever
gonna be happy
as long as his father's around.
[EAGLY SQUEALING]
AUGGIE: I knew you was unclean
when you k*lled your brother!
[GROANS]
[AUGGIE GRUNTS]
You k*lled my brother! You k*lled Keith.
[LAUGHS]
- [g*n c*ck]
- Well, go ahead and do it,
you f*cking p*ssy.
You'll never be able
to get the f*ck away...
♪ [SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
[SOBS]
I read your file, Chris.
It was an accident. You were a child.
Stop letting that sh*t
define who you are.
Dude, we're saving the world
from a f*cking alien invasion.
The whole team is injured,
so I was thinking, like,
maybe you could call in
the Justice g*ng.
- ♪ [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- [RETCHES]
[RETCHES] I have a real bad gag reflex.
Oh sh*t.
You know, one time I puked all
over Green Lantern, I was...
I got seasick from flying
on a green magic carpet.
The weird thing is he f*cking liked it.
♪ [MUSIC TURNS TRIUMPHANT] ♪
PEACEMAKER: You're late,
you f*cking dickheads.
- [SIGHS] What a meathead.
- Screw that guy.
You know he tells
people I'm a puke freak?
[LAUGHS]
The Peacemaker and the costumed
crime fighter Vigilante
were working in a deep cover operation
for the U.S. government
called Project Butterfly.
It's been running for years
out of Belle Reve Prison
under the command of Amanda Waller,
who happens to be my mother.
♪ [UPLIFTING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
♪ [MUSIC FADES] ♪
♪ [PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
[SCREECHES, CHIRPS SOFTLY]
Eagly.
Come on, dude. Stop it.
- [CHIRPS]
- What?
[SQUAWKING INTENSIFIES]
It's too cold outside. It's
too cold outside. Jesus!
[KEYPAD BEEPING]
- [ALARM CHIMES, BUZZES]
- [DOOR UNLOCKS]
There, Eagly. You want to fly, fly.
It's just too damn cold
to take you outside.
[SCREECHES]
[DOOR WHIRRING, OPENING]
[THUD]
PEACEMAKER: Hey.
Mornin'.
[ALIEN GROWLS]
f*ck you then,
you Cryptkeeper-looking b*tch.
Eagly?
[WHISTLES LOUDLY]
[WHISTLE ECHOING]
Eagly, come on, bro.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
Eagly, taking an awful lot for granted.
[EAGLY SCREECHES IN DISTANCE]
I don't work for you, dude. Okay?
Just because I'm out of prison
and we spend a lot of time together
doesn't mean you determine
how that time is spent.
- [EAGLY SQUAKING]
- The one f*cking day
I don't take you out,
you wake me up like
I'm your f*cking sl*ve.
We need to start making
clear who's the human
and who's the eagle.
I'm the human and...
[EAGLY SQAWKS]
Ah, dumbass. [SCOFFS]
What are you doing?
♪ [EERIE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
[CHIRPS]
[KEYPAD BEEPING]
- [KEYPAD CHIMES]
- [DOOR UNLOCKS]
♪ [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
♪ [MUSIC BUILDS] ♪
- AUGGIE: You okay, pal?
- ♪ [MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY] ♪
You sleepwalking again?
You look like you've seen a ghost.
♪ ["OH LORD" BY FOXY SHAZAM PLAYING] ♪
♪ Julian, it's a hungry world ♪
♪ They're gonna eat you alive
son, yeah ♪
♪ Oh, Julian when their fangs sink in ♪
♪ I'll stitch you, but then ♪
♪ I gotta throw you back in, oh ♪
♪ You just try and sleep
even though you're alone ♪
♪ You just close your eyes boy
and dream of home ♪
♪ And light is always on
you just keep that in mind ♪
♪ When you wake in the morning
you'll be satisfied ♪
♪ 'Cause there is always
a wrong to your right ♪
♪ And there will always be
a w*r somewhere to fight ♪
♪ And God knows I've had
some rough f*cking years ♪
♪ Oh, oh Lord, oh Lord
keep on keeping on ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ And God knows I've had
some rough f*ck' years ♪
♪ Oh, oh Lord, oh Lord ♪
♪ Keep on keepin' on ♪
- [SQUAWKS]
- ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
la, la, la, la, la ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
♪ ["DON'T YOU EVER LEAVE ME"
BY HANOI ROCKS PLAYING] ♪
♪ The nights are wearing me down ♪
♪ And it's hard getting
through the day ♪
♪ 'Cause I need you right now ♪
♪ And right now you're so far away ♪
[IMITATES DRUMS]
♪ [SONG CONTINUES ON STEREO] ♪
[CAR DOOR CLOSES]
It's still weird seeing you come
out of your old man's house.
- Mine now.
- Hell yeah, it is.
[CHUCKLES] Hey, Keeya call you back?
[SIGHS EXAGERRATEDLY]
Sorry.
Girl can't deal with me being me.
- That's her problem.
- Deffo.
sh*t. I mean, I'm about
hardcore sh*t now.
That's what I do.
Her not being able to accept that
is like her not being able
to accept me, right?
I don't know. Maybe she just
doesn't want you to die.
- You've seen me handle myself.
- Mm-hmm.
What, you think I look
like I'm gonna die?
- Maybe.
- Get the f*ck out of here.
[CHUCKLES] Okay, Charles Bronson.
Come on, man. You know I got moves.
I'm just saying.
We all might die, okay?
Happens every day to
people tougher than you.
- And you.
- No, not often.
You know, people as tough as me,
they normally die of old age.
- That's just stats.
- LEOTA ADEBAYO: Jesus.
Oh, I almost forgot.
I got business cards.
Check them out.
Oh, that is...
really...
cool.
- Who's the woman?
- That's me.
Okay. Well, she's, um, kind of...
- Gaunt.
- LEOTA: Damn, man.
You really k*lling my vibe.
PEACEMAKER: Talk to Harcourt lately?
'Course. We hung out yesterday.
She's mostly forgiven me for airing out
Task Force X's dirty laundry on TV.
- [SIGHS]
- Did she say anything about...
Like what?
I don't know. She say anything,
like, about me or anything?
Like what?
I don't know.
No.
Hey, Ads. Thanks for driving me.
[CHUCKLES] Happy to do it.
Sometimes, these guys can kind of be
up their own asses, you know?
- Metahumans?
- Yeah.
Sometimes, they say
some not-so-great sh*t.
- Like what?
- I don't know.
Just like I'm stupid.
That I'm wearing a disco ball
on the top of my head.
And they'll be like,
"Hey, why'd you take a vow
to be a douchebag at any cost?"
And they'll say, "Hey, the first season
of Jersey Shore called,
it wants its haircut back".
As if a f*cking TV show
could call you on the phone.
Just f*cking stupid stuff.
I can't remember much.
- Oh.
- PEACEMAKER: I know it's 'cause
my muscles are bigger
than theirs, but jeez, right?
You're a superhero now.
You saved the f*cking world.
♪ [SONG CONTINUES PLAYING ON STEREO] ♪
LEOTA: Yo, are you sure
this is the place?
PEACEMAKER: I think. Mm-hmm.
- LEOTA: Mm.
- PEACEMAKER: Yeah.
I don't want to be a joke anymore, Ads.
This is all I've ever wanted, you know?
To be a real hero.
Are you for real?
They're gonna be doing backflips
to get you to join.
♪ [SONG FADES] ♪
[SOBS]
[HINGES CREAKING]
[DOOR CLOSES]
Welcome, Peacemaker. I'm Maxwell Lord.
My company, LordTech,
finances the Justice g*ng.
With me are two of our founding members,
Green Lantern and Hawkgirl.
Hey. It's really nice to meet you.
Guy, great to see you again.
- [MICROPHONE BEEPS]
- [OVER SPEAKER] Uh-huh.
- You can have a seat there.
- Yes, sir.
Would you like to be called Peacemaker,
- or do you prefer Chris?
- [MICROPHONE BEEPS]
- Oh, either's fine.
- HAWKGIRL: The mic is off?
MAXWELL LORD: Yeah.
Mark that down as indecisive.
- HAWKGIRL: Where?
- LORD: There.
- Here?
- No, there. Look.
How'd I get stuck with this job?
LORD: You're the only one
whose handwriting is legible.
[MICROPHONE BEEPS]
Chris, can you tell us a little
about your skills?
- My skills?
- LORD: That's right.
What sort of skills would you
bring to the Justice g*ng?
- [MICROPHONE BEEPS]
- Besides blowing dudes.
[CHUCKLES] Shut up, Guy.
[MICROPHONE STATIC BUZZING]
Um, I'm considered the finest
marksman in the world.
Not just with firearms,
with any weapon, really.
Yeah, he murders people.
Write that down.
- HAWKGIRL: Where?
- I am also...
proficient in hand-to-hand combat.
GUY GARDNER: Volatile tendencies.
Guy, chill out. I've got it handled.
I have a variety of helmets.
Put it under sociopathy there.
Each one has a different power.
[MICROPHONE BEEPS]
Peacemaker, we at the Justice g*ng
try to avoid casualties.
Metahumans like the ones
in our organization
are becoming more and more distrusted,
and we can't afford to stoke the fires.
I know, I know. Uh...
It says here you served time
for first-degree m*rder.
Yes, that's true, but...
And that you have k*lled dozens
of other people.
Most of those are for good reasons.
- And which ones weren't?
- Excuse me?
Which people did you m*rder
not for good reasons?
- [MICROPHONE BEEPS]
- [CHUCKLES] Well, um...
[MICROPHONE STATIC BUZZING]
I'm gonna be honest.
I haven't always been
discriminating about violence.
But lately, I've been coming
to terms with the...
the trauma I had as a kid.
Here we go.
[YAWNS] Is that popcorn still here?
My brother Keith dying in front of me.
GUY: Oh my God, dude.
You love popcorn.
[HESITATES]
Um, the culture of violence
imposed by my father.
HAWKGIRL: It's low on calories.
Plus, my butt's been
getting really big lately, so...
I don't wanna be like that. You know,
I don't wanna be, like, ruled...
- [HAWKGIRL CHEWING]
- ... by my past experiences and anger.
My butt's not big enough.
Honestly, when I'm naked,
it's just like a line.
- Ew.
- PEACEMAKER: And I've always said
I cherish peace with all my heart
no matter how many people
I need to k*ll to get it.
How many more of these do we have today?
The West Coast has been a wash.
- Excuse me?
- This guy sucks.
Excuse me. Um, this
is gonna sound weird,
but am I supposed to be
able to hear you guys?
[MICROPHONE STATIC BUZZING]
[HAWKGIRL CHEWING]
- [MICROPHONE BEEPS]
- Excuse me?
You know, just, um, like a while ago,
you said I was indecisive and then...
you brought up violent tendencies.
And just now you were all
talking about your butts and stuff.
And also, you said that I suck.
- Do you hear me now?
- Yeah.
- [MICROPHONE BEEPS]
- [STATIC BUZZING]
And, uh, now?
- Yes.
- [GUY LAUGHS]
f*ck!
It is not funny, m*therf*cker.
How long has this been like this?
I'm guessing all day.
All day? Who set it up?
- Guy.
- GUY: Whoa!
No, hey, I am not an A/V guy.
- I had Stan do it.
- The bodyguard?
He is more than just his occupation.
God damn it, Guy! He is not paid to...
GUY: What do you want from me?
LORD: Mr. Smith, Peacemaker, I apol...
Oh my God, how many times
did I mention that rabbit
woman's camel toe?
- Uh...
- I must have said it 30 times.
♪ [INTENSE METAL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- [DOOR SLAMS LOUDLY]
- Oh, didn't go so well?
Apparently, one of my skills
is sucking d*ck.
- What?
- That's not a put down.
That's a f*cking compliment. f*ck them.
I don't want to be in
their lame group anyway.
What the f*ck?
♪ [MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪
- [ENGINE REVVING]
- [TIRES SCREECHING]
After poring over your résumé,
examining your past,
uh, 18 years working
in the intelligence field,
uh, as well as the extensive
interviews I've conducted
with your coworkers
throughout those years,
and, of course,
our lengthy sessions together
discussing your life,
I've come to the conclusion you suffer
from a particularly severe form
of toxic masculinity.
What?
I have a f*cking vag*na.
I assumed.
How could I have toxic masculinity?
Ms. Harcourt, I have to say,
I... I find the insinuation
that only men can suffer
from toxic masculinity a bit sexist.
- Sexist?
- You have every symptom.
- You suppress your emotions.
- Uh-huh.
- You're aggressive and prone to violence.
- Oh yeah? Yeah?
That sh*t's in the DSM-III there?
- The toxic masculinity?
- The DSM-5 now.
You do your best to maintain
a hard appearance.
So my face?
- I'm getting some sort of a bullshit...
- You maintain
- hyper-independence.
- ... non-existent diagnosis based on my face?
I'll give you a diagnosis
based on your face?
You're a f*cking c**t.
Come on, man. You don't
have to write that sh*t down.
In England, c**t means friend.
The NSA has entrusted me to decide
who does and who doesn't have
the psychological wherewithal
- to be employed by the agency.
- My record is exemplary.
I served my country.
I did everything, everything
that it asked of me.
At the CIA, here at the NSA,
at... at... at ARGUS.
Ms. Godfrey, please escort
Ms. Harcourt to the lobby.
And now you come at
me with this nonsense
as some sort of rationalization
for what we both know
is really going on.
Amanda Waller may be facing
congressional hearings,
but she still has enough
power to black-book me
from every intelligence
agency in America.
- Ms. Harcourt.
- I have only been trained
to do one thing my entire life, Doc.
So you tell me what the f*ck
am I supposed to do now?
- ♪ [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- [EMILIA HARCOURT SIGHS]
[MUTTERING] What a f*cking life.
I just want to say,
I don't think what
they're doing is right.
I'm grateful for what you did
with Project Butterfly.
Not all of us are on board
with the way they're handling this.
[CAR HORN HONKS]
- [GRUNTS, YELLS]
- [LOUD THUDS]
- Oh, f*ck!
- [CAR ALARMS BLARING]
f*ck! f*ck! f*ck! f*ck! [GRUNTS]
[PANTS, BREATHES DEEPLY]
Hey.
Hey.
Jesus, what happened to your hand?
Oh, uh, nothing. I just, uh,
beat up my dashboard a little bit.
That m*therf*cking thing had it coming.
[CHUCKLES]
PEACEMAKER: Yeah.
Last time I was in that car,
I was playing some Spin Doctors,
or Thirty Seconds to Mars, or some sh*t.
I was gonna kick its a*s then,
but you two seemed like
you were on good terms, so...
I am not on good terms
with Thirty Seconds to Mars.
How dare you?
[KEYS JINGLING]
- So how's it going?
- HARCOURT: Peachy.
Yeah. That's the vibe you're giving off.
- I mean, I don't even know why I asked.
- [WATER RUNNING]
HARCOURT: So what's up?
PEACEMAKER: Not much.
Just, uh, you know, in the neighborhood,
wanted to swing by, see
how your interview went.
HARCOURT: Perfect, yeah.
Now I've been turned down by the NSA
as well as the CIA, FBI, DIA, and DHS.
[ICE CUBS CLATTERING]
The entire f*cking alphabet
of intelligence agencies.
I... I don't need that.
PEACEMAKER: Yes, you do.
You gotta ice it.
♪ [SOFT PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
There.
Adebayo's the one
who outed Waller anyway.
Why is she torturing me?
She can't take it all out
on her daughter, I guess.
If it makes you feel any better,
my interview also sucked.
It doesn't. Obviously, I know
you wanted that superhero thing.
So that's it? That's why you came?
Yeah.
Okay. Thanks, I guess.
Unless there was something else
you wanted to talk about?
Like what?
- I don't know.
- Okay. [CHUCKLES]
What happened the other
night or something.
♪ [MUSIC STOPS] ♪
On the boat?
- What, that party boat?
- You remember now?
I remember I didn't want to go on it.
Seemed like you wanted to go
on it then. Like, vigorously.
No, I didn't. I told you.
I don't like boats.
I don't like parties.
Why the f*ck would I want
to go on a party boat?
I was speaking metaphorically.
We went on an actual boat, though.
Oh, you know what? Fine.
You agreed to go on the boat 'cause
I told you the views would be nice.
I was talking about when we were on it.
When we were on it, I was drunk.
Yeah, so was I.
Well, maybe you don't
remember much either.
- I remember most of it.
- All right.
Well, then you probably know
more than I do that it was fine.
It happened. Whatever.
But it was also a mistake.
You remember a whole lot
for not remembering.
Not much. Alcohol and f*ck
both foster amnesia, thank God.
- f*ck?
- Not sure what else it would be.
Good?
[SIGHS] All right, Chris, whatever.
If that's what you want
to think, that's fine.
But it's also the end of it.
Fine. I don't know when...
why we're on all this anyway.
The only reason I came here
is to ask about your interview.
- It went sh*t.
- Great. Great. There's my answer.
- Yep.
- Great. Trip well worth it.
- Bye.
- Bye!
♪ ["GUESTLIST" BY
HARDCORE SUPERSTAR PLAYING] ♪
♪ Oh, you're not passing through ♪
♪ Oh ♪
♪ Well, who the f*ck are you? ♪
[INDISTINCT CHATTER, LAUGHING]
♪ I'm off stage don't
have a lot to say ♪
♪ But the party starts anyway ♪
♪ We get into a fight
about the show tonight ♪
♪ It's easy to ruin my day ♪
♪ Oh no, knocking on the door
and she's got a lot to say ♪
♪ You end up in our dressing room ♪
♪ You fill us up with crap ♪
♪ This sh*t won't go away ♪
♪ Oh no, someone's at the door
I have never seen you before ♪
♪ You say you're on the guest list ♪
♪ You gotta get through
well, who the f*ck are you? ♪
♪ Oh no, knocking on the door ♪
- ♪ I've never met you before ♪
- [PARTYGOERS MOANING]
♪ You come into our dressing room ♪
♪ You talk a lot of sh*t ♪
♪ Can't take it no more ♪
♪ Oh no, someone's at the door
I have never seen you before ♪
- [KEYPAD BEEPING]
- ♪ You say you're on the guest list ♪
♪ You gotta get through
well, who the f*ck are you? ♪
♪ Oh yeah ♪
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
- ♪ [SONG CONCLUDES] ♪
- Hey, Adrian.
Dude, listen.
[OWL HOOTING]
- It's an owl.
- JOHN ECONOMOS: Okay.
- Northern saw-whet.
- What?
VIGILANTE: That's the kind of owl it is.
Dude, I know a shitload about owls.
Okay, I... I can't talk right
now, man. I'm working.
Hey, you moved back from Belle Reve yet?
Uh, yeah, but I can't
hang until tomorrow.
- Quiz me.
- ECONOMOS: What?
About owls.
Look up owl facts and then
see if I know the answer.
[SIGHS] Okay, hold on.
[KEYBOARD CLACKING]
Dude, I'm like Rain Man, but with owls.
Okay, Rain Man, here's one.
Are owl's eyes orbs or tubes?
- Orbs.
- Nope, they're tubes.
f*ck off, how can they be tubes?
ECONOMOS: I don't know,
that's what it says.
Well, how do they stay
inside their heads?
Why don't they just spill
out onto the floor?
- I don't know.
- VIGILANTE: Well, you think
every time you're stepping
through the forest,
there'd be owl eyes everywhere
if they were tubes.
- Veins, I guess?
- What?
VIGILANTE: They're attached by veins?
Sure.
All right, give me another one.
You don't know anything about owls.
I do, though. f*ck.
All right, well then,
what do you want to talk about next?
Nothing.
Have you spoken to Peacemaker?
ECONOMOS: Just through email.
He seems bummed-out lately.
I think he thought that
after saving the world,
everyone would finally
treat him like a... like a hero.
Hey, Adrian, what are you doing?
I'm on the phone, Dave.
What does it look like I'm doing?
Quote-unquote "Dave" is here.
Well, get back inside, man.
Your section is a f*cking mess.
Dave was way cooler
when he was a dishwasher
- back when we were friends.
- We were never friends.
Then why did I go to your wedding?
Because you showed up
f*cking uninvited, Adrian.
I guess I gotta go.
Oh no, sh**t. [CHUCKLES]
Great conversation, though, right?
Yeah, it's probably even
better than yesterday,
or the day before that,
or every single day since
I moved to Belle Reve.
VIGILANTE: Yeah, well,
they're all pretty good.
Adrian, you f*ck!
I am coming! Chill out, you f*ck!
Why are you saying the same
thing I just said? Hmm?
VIGILANTE: Words belong to you now?
- What?
- VIGILANTE: Sorry, I didn't know
you copyrighted f*ck.
- DAVE: I did, and you owe me...
- [MONITOR BEEPING]
... a billion dollars
every time you say it.
- ♪ [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- Oh, f*ck.
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
Economos.
- You seeing this?
- ECONOMOS: Yeah.
Anything unusual from your vantage?
No.
SASHA BORDEAUX:
Approach and investigate.
Copy that.
There has to be a solution.
This is the third metahuman escape
from Belle Reve or Arkham
in the past two months.
We've got to find a way
to protect people
from what is rapidly becoming
an existential threat.
- General Flag, sir.
- What is it, Bordeaux?
Remember that January thing?
- The Christopher Smith thing?
- The glitch?
I'm not sure it was a glitch
because it just happened again.
It's similar to what we picked up
this summer in Metropolis.
The Luthor Incident?
Permission to access
your computer, General.
Who's surveilling the house?
Former black hat by the name
of John Economos.
- Oh, right.
- You put him in charge.
No, I... I remember, yeah.
Excuse me. I questioned it because...
'Cause he was close to the subject.
I don't know how close John
Economos can be to anyone, sir,
but yes, they worked
together in Task Force X.
- [DEVICE CHIMES]
- Economos, it's Flag.
Hey, dude, I'm outside
the house right now.
- ♪ [MUFFLED MUSIC THUMPING] ♪
- [INDISTINCT CHATTER]
RICK FLAG SENIOR:
You see anything unusual?
Define unusual.
FLAG: Oh, why do you always
have to be an as*h*le, Economos?
I don't know, probably because
I have some major
chemical imbalance issues, sir.
- John!
- No, nothing overly unusual.
- What the f*ck?
- FLAG: What?
It... It's nothing. It's
just people having sex.
- Like an orgy.
- FLAG: [YELLING] What?
- ECONOMOS: Group sex.
- No, I... I... I heard you.
Jesus, what is it with this cat?
Christopher Smith is
notoriously free-spirited.
♪ [MUFFLED MUSIC CONTINUES THUMPING] ♪
- FLAG: Is he one of them? Smith?
- One of what?
FLAG: One of the people in the orgy.
Uh, yes.
All right. Stay on high alert.
Let me know if anything else comes up.
- Copy.
- [CELL PHONE BEEPS]
Send in another agent
to watch over Economos.
- I do not trust him with this.
- Yes, sir.
And let's move this case
to ARGUS Priority One.
♪ [OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
Priority One?
Yeah, we need to figure out
what this blip is about.
Last thing we need is
another dimensional rift
tearing up this planet.
♪ ["DREAMER" BY FOXY SHAZAM PLAYING] ♪
[EAGLY SCREECHING]
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Life is but a sacred melody ♪
♪ Listen to the wind ♪
♪ Brings me to my knees ♪
♪ I can hear it sung in the birds ♪
♪ I can feel it ♪
- ♪ Bringing the words ♪
- [KEYPAD BEEPING]
♪ If this is just a dream
I don't wanna wake up ♪
♪ No ♪
♪ Don't wake the dreamer ♪
♪ It's like watching the sun rise ♪
♪ I can see the whole world
in your eyes ♪
♪ And I've turned the whole thing over ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ I'll never find anything this good ♪
♪ You can go where you wanna go ♪
♪ Whatcha wanna do ♪
♪ And risk it all for the truth ♪
♪ If this is just a dream
I don't wanna wake up ♪
♪ No ♪
♪ Don't wake the dreamer ♪
♪ If this is just a dream
I don't wanna wake up ♪
♪ If this is just a dream I don't... ♪
What are you doing out here?
♪ If this is just a dream I don't... ♪
I thought you were in Blüdhaven.
- ♪ Don't wake the dreamer... ♪
- Keith?
You okay, man?
- ♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- No, uh...
You smell like a distillery.
You out with the boys?
Uh, yeah... [CHUCKLES HESITANTLY]
What are you knuckleheads doing?
Chrisper, I thought
you were in Blüdhaven.
KEITH SMITH: Yeah, that's what I said.
AUGGIE: Well, the three amigos
are together again.
I believe that calls for a celebration.
KEITH: Yeah, that's
pretty clear thinking
for a man of such advanced years.
Why, you, I oughta...
- KEITH: Ah!
- Pow, pow, pow!
KEITH: Hey, here, old man,
before you get hurt.
[AUGGIE LAUGHING]
- KEITH: Ah!
- Hey!
- What?
- Nothing.
"Nothing, nothing".
[CRIES MOCKINGLY] Oh! [LAUGHS]
- AUGGIE: "Nothing, nothing".
- [GLASSES CLINKING]
Reminds me of the time when I came home.
What were you, like,
KEITH: Oh, here we go.
AUGGIE: And there's Chris
running around the house.
He's being chased by
What the hell do you call them things?
- Imps.
- AUGGIE: Imps, yeah.
Running around.
I go, "Chris, what the hell
are you doing?"
He looks at me and goes, "Nothing".
- [LAUGHS]
- AUGGIE: Nothing?
[LAUGHS] Oh my God.
It was a week before Keith told me.
- No, I didn't want to narc.
- AUGGIE: Chrisper's rummaging
around the munchkin dimension
- eight doors down.
- [KEITH LAUGHS]
They're not munchkins,
Dad. They're imps.
AUGGIE: [LAUGHS]
Trying to nab one of them
giant peppermint sticks.
I found a dead, rotting imp
inside the Dodge engine block,
like, three months later.
I cannot stress how f*cking bad
- it smelled. [LAUGHS]
- [AUGGIE LAUGHS]
You think that's bad.
The next morning, I was
eating my Cheerios,
and there's something sticky in there.
I think one of those
little f*ck jacked off
- in there or something. Yeah.
- KEITH: What? No.
- No. That didn't happen.
- [AUGGIE LAUGHS]
I don't remember that part.
That's the famous Auggie
embellishment right there.
- Yeah, and it's your fault.
- [KEITH LAUGHS]
- You gotta love that boy.
- KEITH: Uh-huh.
[AUGGIE INHALES]
Life would have been a lot easier...
BOTH: But half as much fun without him.
- [CHUCKLES]
- More importantly, Dad,
how many g*dd*mn imps you gotta fight
- before you remember...
- Hey!
- ... what they're called?
- f*ck those imps!
[KEITH AND AUGGIE LAUGH]
♪ ["BLUE JEANS" BY SILVERTIDE
PLAYING ON SPEAKERS] ♪
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[BIKER WHISTLES]
[BIKER JEERING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER CONTINUES]
Bud Light.
[BIKER SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
[WOLF WHISTLES]
You got a problem, Jack Sparrow?
[CHUCKLES] It's just a compliment, babe.
Oh yeah?
There a time you whistled
at some chick and she said,
"Thanks for the compliment,
I suddenly find your c*m-soaked beard
and micropenis energy hot. Let's f*ck?"
[BIKERS LAUGHING]
HARCOURT: Willing to bet no, right?
In fact, I'm willing to bet
no one's ever f*cked you
for any reason other than money or fear.
b*tch is looking to get swatted.
Yeah, you are.
Calm down, lady.
[GRUNTS]
♪ ["BLUE JEANS" CONTINUES PLAYING] ♪
- [GROANS]
- [HARCOURT GRUNTS]
- [BIKER 1 GROANS]
- BIKER 2: Oh sh*t!
- [GROANS]
- [GRUNTS, YELLS]
- [GRUNTS]
- [GROANS]
[GROANS]
- [GRUNTS]
- [BIKER 1 YELLS]
- [GRUNTS]
- [FLOORBOARD CRACKING]
[SCREAMS, GROANS]
Stay down, you f*cking nutjob.
BIKER 3: What the f*ck
is wrong with you?
[GROANS]
- [GRUNTS]
- [BIKER 4 SCREAMS]
- [GRUNTS]
- [GROANS]
[GROANS]
[GROANS]
- [GRUNTS]
- [GROANS]
- [GROANS]
- [GRUNTS]
- BIKER 5: Dang, girl!
- [COUGHS, PANTS]
- [THUD]
- [SOUND DISTORTING]
♪ ["BLUE JEANS" CONTINUES PLAYING] ♪
Bye, b*tch.
[EXHALES]
♪ [SONG CONCLUDES] ♪
[AUGGIE AND KEITH LAUGH]
- KEITH: Whoo.
- [LAUGHS] Oh. Oh.
[KEITH AND AUGGIE SIGH]
Whew. I gotta go to bed.
I got a big day tomorrow.
- Night, Pops.
- [GRUNTS] Night, son.
- [AUGGIE SIGHS]
- I love you.
AUGGIE: Love you. Love you too, buddy.
[KEITH SIGHS]
You still talking with the ex?
- The ex? [CLEARS THROAT]
- KEITH: Yeah.
[CHUCKLES] What's up with you tonight?
Uh, no, I haven't...
I gotta say, I think you blew it
with that one, bro.
[INHALES] I think you should
give that another shot.
I mean, I know she's with that...
[YAWNS] ... jarhead and all, but...
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
[GROANS] All right. Good night, brother.
Keith.
[SIGHS]
I love you.
[LAUGHS] Get out of here,
you drunk as*h*le.
I love you too.
♪ [MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
[SNIFFLES]
[SOBS]
[SIRENS BLARING IN DISTANCE]
What is it?
It's a magic tunnel.
A magic tunnel?
So, you don't know what that is?
- Mm-mm.
- He's never told you
- anything about that?
- No!
How do you even know about it?
ARGUS has been monitoring Peacemaker
ever since Rick Flag Senior
was named director.
Do... Does he know Chris k*lled his son?
Yeah, so he's wasting taxpayer money
having him surveilled 24/7
in the hopes that he screws up.
And a couple months ago,
Maridal radar picked up
an anomalous signal
coming from his house.
Maridal detects known extraterrestrial
- and ectoplasmic energies.
- Yeah, I know what it is.
ECONOMOS: We thought it was a glitch.
And then yesterday, it happened again.
And that's when I saw this.
Hello, I'm f*cked.
Right.
ECONOMOS: So, what do I do?
I mean, it's... it's Peacemaker,
you know? He's like...
- Uh, your friend.
- Now that's pushing it,
but I don't wanna totally
screw the guy over.
But then I think about you.
- [EXHALES SHAKILY]
- Me?
Yeah, you tried to help him,
and now yours and Harcourt's lives
are completely f*cked.
Yo, I'm not f*cked.
You're living in the worst level
of Grand Theft Auto.
That's because Keeya kicked me out.
And because you shared
top secret information
with the press, and
now you can't get a job
at f*cking Athlete's Foot.
- Athlete's Foot is hiring?
- [INDISTINCT SHOUTING OUTSIDE]
[CHUCKLES] Maybe.
- Follow up question.
- Uh-huh.
Does Athlete's Foot still exist?
Yes, there's one in the Terrytown mall.
That's comforting.
Look, you need to talk to Chris
and find out the story
before you go sharing sh*t with ARGUS.
You can't do him like that.
Look, if anybody sees me talking to him,
I could get fired.
It could be ARGUS testing me
for all I know.
Now I get it.
- What?
- You ain't here for no advice.
Fine, I will talk to him
and see what's up.
Just... just AirDrop me the photo.
All right.
Okay.
Did you AirDrop it?
- Yeah, there you go.
- [CELL PHONE CHIMES]
- Oh my God, bro, really?
- Oh sh*t. Nope.
No, no, wrong one. Hold on.
- God damn.
- That's not my d*ck.
♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
- [g*n c*ck]
- ♪ [MUSIC TURNS OMINOUS] ♪
Who the f*ck are you?
I can explain.
Hold on, man. Just...
I don't know if you're
a shapeshifter or what.
- Just...
- Breaking and entering into a man's home?
That's solid justification for me...
- [BOTH GRUNT]
- ♪ [INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
[PANTS]
- Activate magic stars.
- [HELMET WHIRRING]
[GASPS]
[KEYPAD BEEPS]
[GROANS, SCREAMS]
- [KEYPAD BEEPS]
- [PEACEMAKER GROANS]
[PEACEMAKER SCREAMS]
[PANTS, GASPS]
[PEACEMAKER 2 GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
[GROANS]
[PEACEMAKER 2 GRUNTS]
[COUGHS, GROANS]
[GRUNTS]
[PEACEMAKER 2 GROANS]
[ELECTRONICS FIZZING]
- [GURGLES]
- ♪ [MUSIC FADES] ♪
- [PEACEMAKER 2 GROANS]
- [GASPS]
[PEACEMAKER 2 GURGLING, WHEEZING]
♪ [SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING] ♪
[SIGHS]
♪ ["OUTRAGE" BY SISTER SIN PLAYING] ♪
♪ Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! ♪
♪ Cool calm and all collected
try hide that hate from me ♪
♪ Let go pass by unaffected
for what reason you choose ♪
♪ To never expose? ♪
♪ Resolute in denying emotions ♪
♪ It's there whether you
like it or not ♪
♪ Lash out hun make it atrocious ♪
- ♪ One shot! ♪
- ♪ Show for what you lack ♪
♪ Spill your guts now
don't hold it back ♪
♪ C'mon, bring it on
and let me feel it ♪
♪ I want that teenage rampage
mayhem and outrage ♪
♪ C'mon, bring it on
and let me feel it ♪
♪ I want that teenage rampage
mayhem and outrage ♪
♪ C'mon, scream it out
'till I believe it ♪
♪ We need that front page
outrage, all right ♪
♪ Make it bleed between the lines ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ [SONG CONCLUDES] ♪
Can't be looping Spin Doctors in
with Thirty Second to Mars.
Spin Doctors is so good.
Oh, jeez. Anybody's better
than Thirty Seconds to Mars.
That garage band
I was in for two seconds
is better than Thirty Seconds to Mars.
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02x01 - Chapter 01: The Ties That Grind
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Based on the DC comics is A man who fights for peace at any cost, no matter how many people he has to k*ll.
Based on the DC comics is A man who fights for peace at any cost, no matter how many people he has to k*ll.