02x11 - Round Six

[bunniefuu]

ROUND SIX

Darjeeling smells delightful.

I find the fragrance quite calming.

Can I interest you in some tea?

Why is Jack the Ripper here?

Hmm. Nice try, freak,
but I only drink green tea, got it?

-Stand down, Ebisu.
-Huh?

I will not allow senseless k*lling.

Let us go.

Hmph!

Hey, I'm gonna be watching you.

I don't like you or your smug face.

All right. That's enough.

Same goes for you,
Little Miss Eavesdropper.

If you tell anyone
what you heard just now,

you'll end up dead.

My whole life just flashed before my eyes.

Man, what is their problem?

I thought the Seven Pillars
were supposed to make people happy.

But those guys are unhinged.

"Seven"?

Pardon me if I misheard you, my dear,
but you said "seven"?

Uh, yeah. I did.

They're called the Seven Gods
of Good Fortune in Japan.

They bring joy and luck.

But why are you asking about that?

Hmm…

Incorrect assumptions
are mankind's chiefest enemy.

I see now.

Huh?

It's nothing. Pardon me.

I don't believe
I offered you a cup of tea, did I?

How terribly rude of me!

A m*rder*r k*lled Brother Hercules
just like you wanted!

So you look at me
and tell me you're happy!

You have so many injuries.

Hmm?

I nearly forgot.

I do look a bit worse for wear, don't I?

My sincere apologies
for frightening you, my lady.

There's no need to worry.

I'm quite all right.

No, you're not. You're hurt.

Go back to bed. You really should rest.

Oh!

Oh, crap!

I've gotta get going and fast!

Thanks, but no thanks for the tea!

I'll see you around, okay?

Such a waste.

The gods have won three rounds,
and mankind has won two.

After seven million years,

it looks like humanity's end
is drawing near.

So let's cut the suspense
and jump straight into Round Six.

Our next contender
might be the most ironic one yet.

He is the sixth warrior
to fight for the gods.

He is the one who will lead humanity
to its demise.

Behold…

He who once guided man
through the suffering

caused by earthly desires…

The god who showed humanity
a way forward through the darkness…

is about to be brought to light!

GOD

He renounced his palace, his family,

renounced his earthly desires,
and the six destructive emotions.

He walked a path
no one had ever walked before.

He wandered alone,
solitary as the horn of a rhinoceros.

And after only six years,
he reached enlightenment.

He was born alone.

He lives alone.

And he fights alone!

That's the god from before.

He's up next?

Holy is he alone
throughout heaven and earth.

Holy is he alone
throughout heaven and earth!

His solitude is his strength!

For he was born a prince and died a god.

The prodigal son who awakened the world.

And the humans honor him with the name…

Buddha!

BUDDHA

What's going on?

This can't be happening.

Not Buddha.

Hmm?

Huh?

Huh?

Hmm?

Yeah!

He just does
whatever he wants, doesn't he?

He must be going over there
to mock those humans for crying!

Hold on! Just a second.

I… I think you might be a little confused.

You went too far.

-You're supposed to stand over there.
-Hmm?

Mm. Sorry.

Can you throw this out for me?

Ugh!

I need to borrow this thing too.

Ahh… Test! Test!

Aah!

I'm gonna be fighting for the humans.

Thanks.

Huh?

-Hey! You think this is a joke?
-What?

You're a god!
You're fighting for the gods!

You're a disgrace!
Get off the stage!

Disgusting traitor!

My Gjallarhorn!

Shut the hell up.

If you gods won't save mankind,
guess I will.

And if any of you get in my way…

MANKIND

I'm gonna k*ll you.

Well, well, well.

Wait…

What the heck just happened?

Why would Buddha want to fight
on the humans' side?

No way.

Did you get him to do this?

Throughout all heaven and earth,
he alone is the honored one.

What?

Gods like him prefer to do as they please.

And they certainly
don't take kindly to being pushed.

SHORTLY BEFORE ROUND SIX

All right. Get it together, Brünn.

You look like hell when you cry.

You know that, right?

Sorry. "Brünn"?

I certainly hope
you aren't referring to me…

Buddha.

Mm. Who else?

You want some?

No, thank you.

So what's the deal?

Why are you crying?

I'm in grief.

Mourning the losses of those poor souls
about to disappear.

Hmm…

Fine. Don't tell me then. Ah…

Are you just here to pry

or have you come
to speak with me about something?

Oh, right. Uh, hang on.

So here's the thing,

ol' Zeus told me
I got to fight for the gods in Round Six.

But I can't.

'Cause I'm gonna fight
for the humans instead.

If that is what you choose.

Man, talk about Zen!

You know, Brünn?

Judging by that reaction,
I'd swear you saw this coming.

Whatever do you mean by that, Buddha?

Well, I knew something was up
when you asked me how to use Samavadhāna.

Come to think of it, you did that
right before the meeting

where they decided to hold Ragnarok.

You've been making moves
for quite a while now, haven't you?

Always ahead of the game…

Tell me, was setting me up
to fight the gods for you

part of your plan from the start?

Setting you up?

Oh, I would never dare.

And yet…

Could you blame me if I did?

After all, we both know no one hates
the gods more than you do.

Oh, man, that was pathetic!

I wish you could see
how guilty you look right now.

"You're right,
the ends justify the means."

Is that what you were hoping
I'd say to you, Brünn?

Well, that doesn't matter.

I only came here to tell you one thing.

I know you tricked me
and I'm gonna make you pay for it.

For f*ck's sake…

I can't stand him.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
What do you think you're doing?

You can't just switch teams like that.

The roster for Ragnarok
is already picked out. See?

No defecting, or divine intervention,
or anything like that allowed.

Oh, just let him go.
What do I care?

I…

Lord Zeus… I'm… I'm sorry,

but I'm afraid the rules of Ragnarok
cannot be bent.

The gods and the humans
both put forth warriors.

Whichever side wins
seven rounds first is the victor.

Those are the only rules stipulated
in Article ,

Paragraph of the Valhalla Constitution.

But more than that,

you can't deny
that he's introduced a gripping twist,

can you now, Heimdall?

Why, it's enough to make me want
to get back into the ring myself, hmm…

Well, that's flattering.

I am so down to go a round
with you anytime, Pops.

Just say the word.

Buddha…

Tell me,

are you prepared
to make enemies of us all?

Will you truly forsake your fellow gods?

Broken record, much?

Didn't I tell you already?

Friends or enemies, good or bad,

gods or humans,
it's all just noise to a god like me.

Only one thing in the universe is certain,

I do what I want.

Are you kidding me?

You don't get
to walk out of this alive, traitor!

So, who am I k*lling today?

Don't you worry.
Your opponent has already been chosen.

Oh, yeah?

Well, that makes things easy.

Punishment.

Punishment.

Punishment.

Punishment.

LONGEVITY

What…

Is that…

the Seven Gods of Good Fortune?

Ah, you're right on time.

I'll leave the rest to you.

Understood.

Um…

The warrior fighting for the gods
in Round Six is…

Vaiśravana!

Uh…

Could everyone who isn't Vaiśravana
or Buddha leave the ring now, please?

Hey, buddy.

Did you hear me?

The seven of you can't fight as a team.

It's against the rules.

Foolish creature.

We are not seven. We are one.

Huh?

Shield of Ahimusa!

Here I come!

Now you're gonna die, Buddha!

I'm fired up!

My turn!

It's time!

Daikokuten, ready to engage!

Wait! What am I seeing right now?

The Seven Gods of Good Fortune.

TREASURE

Seven deities who preside
over all the world's luck.

However,

it is said that there is one more god
among their ranks,

the legendary Eighth God of Good Fortune.

For eons, mortals have wondered…

Does the eighth god truly exist?

Nay!

Nay!

Nay!

For the Seven Gods of Good Fortune
were never truly seven at all.

They were always one.

When he sets foot upon the earth,
the heavens shall be destroyed,

all happiness shall disappear,

and mankind shall suffer
eternal misfortune.

His name…

Zerofuku!

ZEROFUKU

I feel like sh*t.

Makes me wanna k*ll someone.

Hmm…

I can move. I can move.

But something feels off.

What is this?

You're ignoring me?

Humans never change.

What a pity.

Looks like I'll have to destroy.

"Crush"?

"Dismember"?

"Annihilate"?

"Slaughter"?

Hmm…

That's the one.

Slaughter!

Slaughter you!

What… what's wrong with him?

He… he's out of his mind!

I never imagined
such a sinister deity could exist.

Well, Zerofuku lives up to his reputation.

Huh? "Zero"?

But misfortune often precedes blessings.

Which one will prevail
is a matter of fate.

Who could be… Uh…

Oh, it's from management.

RAGNAROK ROUND SIX
BUDDHA VS. VAIŚRAVANA

RAGNAROK ROUND SIX
BUDDHA VS. ZEROFUKU

They can't be serious.

They're really gonna let the humans
and the gods change their fighters now?

Well, can't say I didn't warn them.

Uh… Alright.

I guess we're doing this now.

In the human's corner, we have…

Buddha!

BUDDHA

And in the god's corner, Vaiśravana! Uh…

The Seven Gods of Fortune…

No! Not them either!

Sorry, I was not prepared for this.

It's Zerofuku!

ZEROFUKU

Fight!

"Zero"?

So that's what he was talking about!

Hey, what gives?

And who's that Zerofuku guy?

What happened to the seven gods?

How'd they manage to merge themselves
into one form like that?

"Merge"?

You say that as if
they were always seven separate gods.

I've never seen him before,
but it's clear.

Zerofuku is the seven gods' true form.

Wow.

They were secretly this guy all along?

He was once a gracious god.

One who spread good fortune and joy
to everyone around him.

But then…

he experienced grief
and it turned him into a monster.

Divine punishment.