01x06 - Finding Rudolph

[bunniefuu]

JOHN LURIE:

I live on a tiny island.

It's beautiful here.

I ended up here by accident.

I was boxed in.

But it ended up being

one of the best things

that ever happened to me.

And before I lived

where I live now,

I lived up on this hill

where the baby pigs live.

And on the property

was this man, Rudolph

who took care of

a little herd of goats

in the garden.

And they gave him a room,

but he never stayed in the room.

He used to sleep

in the mango trees.

So I had an extra room,

and I gave it to Rudolph.

And he would stop by as the sun

was going down,

and turn on the TV.

And I would paint

while he watched TV.

And if he put on something

really horrible,

I would make him change

the channel.

But he was always fine

with that.

And we would be in this room

together for eight hours,

and not speak a word.

I loved that.

Then Rudolph would say, "John

I have to take a five."

And he would go to sleep

and get up really early

the next morning

and go and take care

of his goats.

After I moved,

Rudolph disappeared.

And he had been talking

about this property

he had up somewhere

that he had inherited,

and he was gonna build

a house there.

But you didn't really believe

that he was gonna do that.

But that's what we assumed

he had done.

And we couldn't reach him.

He didn't have a phone.

There was no way to find him.

Now, it's been years

since I've seen him.

And then one day, Leroy said,

"I saw Rudolph.

I think I know where he lives."

So

we're gonna go and look for him.

There's Nesrin looking all cute.

NESRIN WOLF:

Wow, it's nice here.

LEROY JACOB: It's bottomless.

You want to dive?

JOHN: No, no, no.

The last guy that tried to clean

the lake in the '80s or '70s

-JOHN: Yeah?

-LEROY: One remained.

JOHN: Oh, why?

LEROY: Well, maybe they drink

their rum, having a good time.

-JOHN: And so-- and drowned?

-LEROY: And drowned.

JOHN: And did they get

the dead body out?

LEROY: We still drinking it.

-JOHN: We still

drinking him, yeah.

NESRIN:

It's that deep here, huh?

LEROY: Yeah, bottomless,

you know.

JOHN: This was a volcano,

so I imagine it's--

-NESRIN: Duh. Of course.

-LEROY: Yeah.

-NESRIN: Yes, yes, yes.

-JOHN: Did this ever erupt?

-LEROY: No.

-JOHN: Is this active?

LEROY: It-- No, it's old.

But there is a live one

underwater that's active.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-Sometimes the--

-If it goes off, we'll call you.

-Yeah.

-"Could you pick us up now?"

-Yeah, it had been monitored.

-NESRIN: Yeah.

-The last time, it was on what?

Yellow or, you know,

you have different colors

-when it starts to-- Yeah.

-NESRIN: Mm-hmm. Right.

JOHN: We're gonna see

Rudolph today.

I can feel it.

There's Rudolph

and that's his house.

I'm proud of him.

JOHN: Isn't life strange?

So, that's

that high-pitched thing,

that's mostly tree frogs.

That

And there's two--

they make two sounds,

I think in one gesture,

where one is

to establish territory,

it's the male tree frog,

and the other one is to--

to attract the female.

And the females rarely

make a sound,

but they're attracted to the,

uh

to the

other sound.

And there's a rhythm

to it.

It all makes sense, like, you--

everybody's done it--

you know, sitting out

on the porch

and the crickets

are making sounds,

and there's a

And there's a rhythm to it

and it locks in.

And it's like,

so there's a tree frog there,

a tree frog there, a tree--

(IMITATES TREE FROGS)

But there's anoth-- I mean,

they seem to almost

be call and response,

and answering

(BLOWS) each other.

But if-- if you kind of try

to go along with it,

it always drifts off.

If you just, like, try to sing

along for, uh (

for two bars, you're out

of whack with them already.

Even though it sounds like

they're just going

But they're not.

The pygmies do this music,

and it--

it's just

Oh, it's so beautiful.

And it's so rhythmically right.

But you cannot figure out,

really, where they are.

It's just--

You can't count it, you can't--

And then--

and you have a hard time

getting Western musicians

to play like that,

'cause they get locked

into this thing of counting.

And most people, I mean most

you know, we-- we sort

of count to four in our heads

when we're

exercising or dancing

or whatever,

we sort of--

we have an in-built thing--

one-two-three-four,

one, two--

But it really kind of

ruins something.

It sort of takes away

something beautiful in life,

where you really kind of get

locked into this idea

of, like, bar lines.

Bar lines are like a prison.

'Cause this is so musical

and there's no bar lines.

That's what I think.

This is the section

of our program

where we show you

how the white people dance.

Yeah.

Shall I move on

to another thing?

-ERIK MOCKUS: Mm-hmm.

-That was fine, right?

We can use that?

ERIK: Yeah. Just-- Yeah.

-NESRIN: Yes.

-ERIK: But-- Yes, John!

-NESRIN: Yes.

Very good.

You are so f*cked up.

-You are so f*cked up.

-NESRIN: That sounded so funny.

-You know

I'm-- I'm doing this show.

-Are we still filming, right?

-ERIK: Yeah,

we're still filming.

I'm doing this show,

and I-- and I--

because I'm-- I'm ill,

I mean

So what we do is

I-- There was this kid--

well, "kid," he's 33--

he came here

you know, and I figure,

well, it's just like--

You know, 'cause I get an hour

or two a day where I'm okay.

And so, like,

in a 24-hour period,

we kind of sh**t during

that hour or two that I'm okay.

Except, uh-- and I-- I didn't

you know, didn't know what

a problem this was gonna be,

but I hate this f*cking kid.

I can't stand being around him.

And he's--

he's standing right there.

And he's just unbearable.

It's just, like,

when he eats,

the food drips out of his mouth.

-(NESRIN LAUGHS)

-(LAUGHING) You can't laugh.

You can't laugh.

We're making a show here.

And, uh

I don't know.

I suspect he's coming in--

into my bathroom

and using my towels,

and he's covered

with this weird slime

that he puts on himself

in the morning.

I'm trying to get him to laugh,

to see if his camera

will jiggle.

Have you jiggled? You didn't?

I don't--

You know,

I finish a take, you know,

and it's kind of weird talking--

I don't feel comfortable

just talking to a camera,

so, it's, like,

this really weird thing.

And if I do pull this off,

it means I'm a sociopath.

But it's hard for me to sit here

and talking to the camera.

And so I finish, and then,

you know, I want some reaction,

and he's like,

"Yeah, it was okay."

(LAUGHING)

And so that's pretty much

what I get every time.

And-- but he--

and so I need him

to give me a little something

when I'm finished,

or I become even more insecure

than I was when I started.

Except

You know.

But I've told him

all these stories already,

like in-- when we

rehearse the sh**t sometimes,

then I do it again,

and so he's heard it, so--

And then I thought,

if we stop telling him

the stories in advance--

And then I'm telling him

this story

and he starts laughing

in the middle,

so the camera's bouncing

up and down.

His name is Erik.

Actually, he's f*cking good--

he-- I don't--

Oh, I know what to do.

He hates compliments.

It's been really amazing

working with him, though.

I couldn't have done it

with anybody else.

This kid came down here

and did this with me,

and we pulled this off,

as sick as I've been.

And, uh, we're just

on the same page

about everything.

So, uh

I'm only saying this now,

but we're cutting it out

of the show.

But I just--

I'm just saying it

to make him uncomfortable.

All right, fan, fan,

time for the fan.

Did that hurt?

-ERIK: Yeah.

Hello. This is John's trash.

It's beautiful.

-JOHN: You know

you-- you should try this.

You should get some paints

and some brushes

and some paper.

I mean, watercolor,

it's not expensive.

You don't need a--

just a little tiny pad.

Pick a decent

paper, and paint, and brushes.

And just mess around with it.

And don't expect to make

anything good right away.

Just do it. Just see what

I mean, see what it gives you.

'Cause it's so rewarding.

A-- and

and then, you get good at it

kind of fast, you know.

It's gonna stink

in the beginning.

You're gonna stink

in the beginning, you know.

But what do you expect?

But just mess around with it.

It's just the--

what it gives you,

what the water does,

what the paints do.

It's just fascinating

and really relaxing.

Unless, of course, you expect

you're gonna do something great

right away,

and then,

you're gonna be miserable.

But, uh

just put the paint on the paper,

and see what you have.

I mean, just see what it is.

It's really worth it.

It's better than watching TV.

I mean, that's how--

you know, how I started re--

I mean, I painted all my life,

but not

I got-- I got Lyme,

and I had to give up music.

And all I did

was go to the doctors

and watch Law and Order.

And I had paints and stuff,

and so I would mess around.

But I was only doing it for me.

And then, I had this kind of

eureka moment. It was like

"This could be what music was.

This could give you back

what you lost."

I didn't expect that was going

to ever happen with painting,

but it really did.

And then, this with music.

I mean, painting

with painting,

it's great because

you don't have to talk

to any musicians.

You don't have to explain

to a musician

what a calendar is.

You don't have to

get in a bad mood because

everybody's an hour late.

There's no

I mean, the art world

is disgusting,

so you might wanna

avoid that part.

But just

you know

just get some paint,

mess around with it,

put the color down.

It's good for you.

And don't let anybody see it.

NESRIN: Just look at each other.

That's the best way.

ANN MARY GLUDD JAMES:

Like we did it the last time?

We should-- we should--

we should look angry first.

JOHN: No, look at each other.

-NESRIN: Yeah.

-And then do whatever you want.

Do you mind telling

the people at home

what a good and fair boss I am?

JOHN: That was really good.

I'm gonna ask you,

and then you'll film me asking.

-(NESRIN LAUGHING)

-ANN MARY: Oh, my God.

JOHN: Would you mind telling

the people at home

uh, what a good

and fair boss I am?

Oh, boy.

(LAUGHS)

-(LAUGHING) Look at your face.

-JOHN: So, tell the people

how it is working for me.

-It's good, isn't it?

-Oh, my God.

JOHN: All right,

now film me doing it.

-(BOTH LAUGHING)

-That's the worst thing. I--

Boss should ask another question

because if people see this,

you know,

they'll say,

"He must ha-- he must be

-a terrible boss."

-Terrible person.

-"Like they can't say anything."

-Ann Mary--

Ann Mary, you're right.

ERIK: What's-- what's it like

working for John Lurie?

-NESRIN: Yes, I'm sorry, Erik. Go ahead?

ERIK: What's it like

working for John Lurie?

NESRIN: Look at them--

-Ann Mary, you--

Look at your face.

NESRIN: That's what he say.

ANN MARY:

I'm looking for your reaction.

NESRIN:

Oh, that's a nice expression.

-Oh, my God. We froze this.

-Oh, no, that's so cool.

Like, you can look

at the camera without blinking,

-which I can't do. You can--

-ANN MARY:

It's impossible not to laugh.

-And here comes John.

-ANN MARY: Look at him.

-NESRIN: Uh-huh, he is adorable.

Gotta look angry.

-NESRIN: And look angry.

-Wait, I'll do it. Here I am.

-ANN MARY: Oh, oh, oh,

the angry part--

-NESRIN: What should they do?

-Maybe you should come

and stand in the middle.

-JOHN: Yeah, I'm here.

-And, when he asks the question,

so we both look at you like

Would you mind telling

the people at home

what a good and fair boss I am?

-Now-- now they're good.

-NESRIN: Okay.

-Would you mind--

ANN MARY: You laughing.

Do you mind telling

the people at home

what a good and fair boss I am?

JOHN: You mind telling

the people at home

what a good and fair boss I am?

Oh, you're supposed to crack up.

ANN MARY: I thought you said--

ANN MARY: That's the worst.

-I, uh-- uh--

-JOHN: Uh, uh, uh.

-ANN MARY: Who does that?

-JOHN: I said that?

ANN MARY: I told you.

Hello, and welcome

to Painting with John!