02x02 - Fulfillment

[bunniefuu]

-This is really cool.
-Yeah.

ROBIN: Yeah, this our second season
and it's really...

And the friendships that are made...

-It's so cool, you look amazing.
-ROBIN: Oh.

-Talking to the ladies out there.
-Beautiful.

-Oh. Oh. Oh.
-KYLA: I know, we were talking

so much outside, I was like,
"Wait, we might need

-"to save something." [LAUGHS]
-Yeah... Oh, my God. I know, I know.

-[THEME SONG PLAYING]
-SINGER: Yeah, we're turning

Yeah, we're turning

Yeah, we're turning

Yeah, we're turning

[SINGER SCATTING]

ROBIN: Something really special happens
when women connect,

share, dream, and inspire each other.

ROBIN: This is Turning the Tables.

[THEME SONG CONCLUDES]

On the surface of the show,
people, if they were looking in,

they would go like,
"What do these four women have in common?"

And what I love about it is
that we all have more in common than not.

-Right.
-KYLA: Yes.

ROBIN: And it's just about
taking that time

to just go below the surface a little bit.

Just sitting outside
when we were getting to know each other,

Chloe and I found out that we're both
first-generation Americans.

-CHLOE: Mm.
-Oh.

My parents from Greece and Bulgaria,

-hers from Korea.
-ROBIN: Yeah?

And that experience of growing up

-as a child of immigrants...
-Right.

...because as a kid,
I think what I learned from it,

I gained enormous empathy
for people that came from other places

because my parents
spoke with accents and they didn't...

They weren't educated
but they were very intelligent people...

-Right.
-...and I could tell

if sometimes someone
treated them differently

because they had an accent
or they didn't

-get their grammar correct or something.
-ROBIN: Hmm

-You mentioned Greece.
-Yes.

Weren't you just in Greece?

-I went to Santorini and Mykonos.
-[RITA EXCLAIMS]

-KYLA: Oh!
-Well, they're the highlights.

-I know.
-It's so beautiful.

-I had the best time.
-So jealous.

-RITA: Oh!
-It was great,

and I'm... I feel like
I'm such a workaholic that, like,

my friends were begging me
to go on this vacation.

-Hmm.
-So, like, "You haven't been on one

"in six years, you need to go."

You hadn't been on a vacation
in six years?

-Six years. Yeah.
-KYLA: Wow.

I don't know why,
it just... [CHUCKLES] Years just fly by.

-I feel like I have that same issue...
-CHLOE: Yeah.

...because I started working so early,
I feel like I've been

-unknowingly programmed to work.
-RITA: Mm-hmm.

-Ooh.
-KYLA: And as soon as

work comes up, it's like,
"Drop everything else."

-Especially in the business that I'm in.
-ROBIN: Right.

It's like, you never know
when a job is coming.

So, I would plan things

and work would come, and I'd be like,
"Oh, never mind."

And as I've gotten older,

I've come to realize,
like, I have to learn that balance,

um, especially having kids,
and understanding,

like, I don't want my kids to...
[CHUCKLES] ...grow up and being like,

"You were working all the time."

-Right.
-KYLA: I want them to see

the balance of "Mommy worked really hard,"

but then also
"Mommy played really hard too."

-ROBIN: That's it.
-KYLA: "Mommy enjoyed herself

and took the time to relax."

And I was able to do that this summer.

Um, last year, I wasn't able to do it
before I had to go back to work,

and I was really upset with myself
that I wasn't able to plan something

because I was still coming out of it.

And then this year,
I was like, "No, I'm scheduling this."

And even things came up,
and I was like, "Nope, sorry,

"trip with my kids."
I'm, like, "I'm not available."

-CHLOE: Yeah.
-And it was like... [SHRIEKS]

-[LAUGHS]
-Wow.

But I did it and I'm so happy

-that I did.
-But don't you think we're actors?

I've always said to my actor friends
if they're not working...

I say, "If you want a job,
plan a non-refundable vacation."

KYLA: Yeah. Absolutely.

One thousand percent
you're gonna get a job.

-KYLA: Absolutely.
-Oh, uh...

It's a release, like I really...

-[LAUGHS]
-...don't wanna do this right now.

What's the last time, Rita,
that you did something only for you?

In the summertime, when it's warm, I swim.

There's no weight on your body,
so you're floating through water.

-KYLA: Mm.
-I allow my mind to just wander.

-Hmm.
-RITA: I listen to music in my head,

I have conversations. I talk to God.

-I...
-Mm.

And I swim for a long time,
I can go for like 40 minutes,

-and...
-What?

...when I do something for me,
it usually means that I'm taking time off

to just be alone and be still.

-KYLA: Mm.
-And that is so key.

And I'm seeing more and more
in the entertainment world

and in the sports world,
taking care of self.

-Yes.
-RITA: Right.

-Simone Biles.
-CHLOE: Right.

-Naomi Osaka.
-CHLOE: Absolutely.

-The list goes on and on and on.
-Right, right.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah...

You've said to yourself too,

that you want to take
a bit of a break, right, Chloe?

Yeah. I think, for me,

the most important lesson I've learned
is just to be kind to myself.

Just respect myself more
than I ever could.

And what does that look like for you?

I think it was just...
I... I mean, I've been competing

at pro-level snowboarding competitions
since the age of 13.

And I started winning them
when I was 14...

-Wow.
-...and that kind of didn't stop until,

-you know?
-ROBIN: It hasn't stopped.

-It hasn't stopped.
-KYLA: No.

And I think that
I was in this very toxic place

where I thought that's what I had to do...

-ROBIN: Mm.
-...and also felt like I allowed people

to tell me what to do and who I had to be.

-Mm.
-ROBIN: Mm.

And not...
It was never malicious at all

but it was just,
I... I didn't really, like,

stand up for myself
or speak for myself or anything

because I had this mindset of
respecting your elders,

-or like, respecting...
-ROBIN: Right.

-And I think...
-Did you also have a fear

you didn't wanna disappoint?

I just thought
if I did everything I was told

and listen to everybody around me,

then I would be doing the right thing
and I would be happy.

But that wasn't true
because I was disregarding the way I felt

and the way that those actions
affected me and my mental health.

And that was a really hard journey
to be on.

RITA: What were the steps
that you had to take

once you recognized
that you had to be kind to yourself?

-CHLOE: Right.
-What... was it immediate?

-Or was it a gradual thing?
-It... it took time.

-Yeah.
-You know? It was a little,

little steps at a time.
Little moments where I could...

I felt empowered.

I can relate
in so many ways to... [CHUCKLES]

...both of the things you guys just said.

-Yeah.
-And having the same feelings of

"No, respect to your elders,
and just do what you're told."

And... and I also feel like
as the oldest child,

I'm realizing, like,
a little... a little pleaser,

-like I wanna please everybody.
-Yeah. Same here.

KYLA: I wanna to make sure
everybody's happy.

And I think that it's... it's gradual,

and it's still something
that I'm practicing, I think, every day...

-You go inner, you go inside.
-KYLA: ...is...

-You really...
-Yeah. I try to make sure

I'm understanding
how I'm going to communicate it

-before I do. Because I... I know...
-Oh.

...it's not always what you say,
it's how it's delivered.

-Make sure...
-Have you heard this expression?

"Say what you mean,
mean what you say, but don't say it mean."

-I know that...
-KYLA: Yes.

-RITA: I love that.
-I love that. I've never heard that.

But it's true.
You can say anything you wanna say.

-And I try to do everything with a smile.
-Yeah.

Even the words
that come out of my mouth is like, "Oh."

-They don't match what my face is doing.
-[ALL LAUGH]

But... but it's a part of me
standing up for myself.

I honestly feel like,

in order to be the best mother
I want to be,

I have to be happy,

and what makes Kyla happy.

And it's so difficult.

I have a note in my phone,
it was like, with...

When I was going through some things,
and I was like, "What makes Kyla happy?"

And the answer cannot be,
"Whatever makes blank happy."

I think that the best thing
that I've seen myself after I learned to,

you know, create boundaries,
protect myself

and put myself first is that
it makes me look forward to the future.

-Yeah.
-I'm excited about things

because I know
those are truly what I want,

and no one's telling me
that that's what I want. Right?

-Ooh.
-So, I can really look forward to things.

-I'm excited again, I'm excited to...
-Right.

...to gain more experiences and wisdom,
and all of these incredible things

that I think I was always afraid of...

-RITA: Hm.
-...because I never knew what to expect,

but now, I'm so excited for the future.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC CONCLUDES]

I remember
I wanted to be a sports journalist.

No. I wanted to be a professional athlete.

-RITA: Yes!
-But... What was that thing? Ability.

-Uh-huh.
-ROBIN: Ability you must have,

-that Chloe has.
-"What's that thing?"

-ROBIN: I'm going "I wanna get that."
-She said, "What's that thing...

-"...that's kind of important?"
-But what I wanted to be...

-What sport would you have done?
-ROBIN: Tennis. But I was a...

-RITA: Oh, I love it.
-I was a state bowling champion

-of Mississippi at the age of 12.
-CHLOE: Oh, my God.

-Oh, my goodness.
-Wow.

That was the only thing
they'd let a girl do at that time.

-So, I...
-Oh, wow.

-...just bowled and...
-So, you just came in and dominated?

-I did.
-"That's the only thing

"you'll let me do,
let me show you how to do it."

-ROBIN: I'mma be good at it.
-RITA: Wow.

But tennis, basketball and that...
But I...

was... I remember I was in, uh,
junior high, and we would have career day.

And I wanted a career in sports.

And at that time, I thought the only way
I could be a woman and be athletic,

I'm going to be
a physical education teacher.

-Mm.
-That's what I thought.

-Yeah.
-So I went home, and my mother is big.

She was on the State Board of Education
in Mississippi.

-RITA: Wow.
-Education, very important.

And I thought
she'd be very happy that I said,

"I'm gonna be
a physical education instructor...

-RITA: Yeah.
-"...and a coach."

And she looked square at me,
she go, "Girl, no, you're not."

-KYLA: Mm.
-"That's not what you wanna do.

"That's the only thing you think

-"you can do."
-[ALL EXCLAIM]

-And I'm so...
-That's good parenting.

-KYLA: Yes, Mommy!
-Isn't it?

And so, I was like, "Oh, you're right."

-Wow.
-I'm letting it define...

I want to be a sports journalist.

-KYLA: Mm.
-I don't see anybody

-who looks like me...
-RITA: Wow. Yeah.

...but... but I'm gonna do it.
And Rita, when I look...

Have you heard her music?

-Have you heard this woman's music?
-No, I haven't.

That's what when you... when you...
when she walked up,

and you said you've been listening
to their music, I'm like, "Hold on.

-"Wait a minute."
-[LAUGHS]

-To... to step out...

-How have you done that?
-RITA: Well...

And were you fearful of doing that?

Terrified.
I was really terrified to do it.

But, uh, I had read an article, uh,
that Oprah had given an interview,

and one of the things
that she said in the interview

was asking herself
what it was that she wanted.

And she said most people don't know
what it is they want,

but they never ask themselves
that question.

And once you get the answer,

you know what the steps are to take
to make that happen.

And so, it was like, "What do I want?"

I was already married,
I had a pretty good career,

-I had healthy children...
-Pretty good career.

I used that actor’s game, "What if?"

"What if I could ask myself
what I wanted?"

And, um, when the answer came to me,

it was literally like
fireworks going off in my head.

-And that was music.
-Mm.

I ended up doing
the musical Chicago on Broadway.

-KYLA: Mm.
-Now that sounds like I made a big jump,

-but it was terrifying.
-[KYLA CHUCKLES]

Terrifying, 'cause, you know, you had

to put it out there,
"I'd like to do music." And then,

one day, an offer comes in,
and you're like,

-"Uh, yo... okay." And...
-CHLOE: Right. You put it out there.

and sometimes your family
can be the... the... the people

that know that you should do something
even before you think you can.

It was one thing to have the dream,

and then it was another thing to say,
"Now I'm putting myself out there."

-KYLA: Yeah.
-But I did do it

and what it led me to was, um,

realizing how much I needed music
in my life.

People usually know
what it is that they want,

but somewhere along the line,

-it gets squashed.
-Yes.

If you wanted to be a singer or a dancer,

and, uh, you... you heard
from a... an adult that said,

-"You have two left feet...
-ROBIN: Hmm.

"...you can't dance."

-Yeah.
-RITA: Or, "Singing?

"You can't make a living at that!"

-Whatever. People...
-People put their own insecurities on you.

...they put their own insecurities
and their own fears on you.

-KYLA: Mm-hmm.
-And I...

I always tell people, "Look,
if there's something that you want to do,

"you don't need to necessarily do it
on a public scale..."

-KYLA: Right.
-"...but you can take an improv class.

"Take a dance class.
Have your girlfriends or your guy friends

"come over and sing songs once a month..."

-Yeah.
-"around the piano.

"And... and... and explore
those parts of you

that give you so much joy...

-Yes.
-"...and fulfill you."

It doesn't have to be on a public scale.

I mean, you can find that stuff
in every community.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

[UPBEAT MUSIC CONCLUDES]

-I've always craved more.
-Good.

My parents, um, they're awesome,

so supportive, so loving,
that they've always been like,

"Never just settle." Like,
"Always keep pushing forward."

-Hmm. Hmm.
-"Keep exploring. Live your life."

-That's great.
-They want me to experience

as much as I possibly can

and learn from mistakes and they're...

They've always been
so supportive of that and...

I remember... [CHUCKLES]
...when I came home from Beijing

with my second gold medal and, um,

I see them at the airport,
they're like, "Good job."

That's all I got like,
"Good job. We're proud of you."

-[KYLA LAUGHS]
-You know?

-KYLA: Mm-hmm.
-And I was like,

"All right, cool." [CHUCKLES]

-ROBIN: Oh!
-"Thank you."

Um, so... [CHUCKLES]
...guess I have to go do more now.

But I love that.

I love how...
I love how they keep pushing me,

and that makes me push myself more

and it's just... it's incredible,

and I'm so grateful
for all these opportunities that I have.

The fact that I've allowed myself
to be in this position

and just take it all in 'cause I think
I've always struggled to do that.

And over the last few years,
I've realized that I never looked back.

And just took a moment
to take in all my accomplishments,

-everything that I've...
-Good for you.

-RITA: Yes.
-...been able to overcome. And the minute

I did that, I felt a sense of closure.

-KYLA: Mm.
-Like...

I'm amazing. I'm incredible.
I'm talented. I'm smart.

-That validation...
-That's great!

-KYLA: Yes.
-CHLOE: ...from myself...

-Yes.
-...to myself

was the most important thing
I think I have ever done.

KYLA: 'Cause that's the main thing
that matters.

-Yeah.
-ROBIN: [CHUCKLES] Yeah!

That's what matters the most.

-CHLOE: Yeah.
-RITA: More so...

-KYLA: It's how you feel about yourself.
-Isn't it true, your first gold medal

for a while, you just threw it
in the trash?

I did.
That was a dark story though. [LAUGHS]

-ROBIN: No, but I mean...
-[LAUGHS]

-But, uh...
-Yeah, no. So, I...

So, my first Olympics was when I was 17,
in 2018 in Korea.

-And everybody...
-RITA: Oh, my God.

Everybody leading up to it was like...

The pressure.

-But it was also just like...
-KYLA: Mm.

...strike when the iron's hot,
'cause nobody's gonna care afterwards.

-'Cause women's halfpipe snowboarding...
-ROBIN: Ooh.

-...wasn't that big, really.
-ROBIN: Yeah.

That year, uh, my life
just changed completely.

You know? Um, people were recognizing me
at Corner Bakery,

where I would go
and get my breakfast panini.

-ROBIN: Mm-hmm.
-Um, like,

everyone's always taking photos of me.
I just felt so out of place cause that...

-ROBIN: Wow.
-...really only happened in the mountains.

I never thought
it would happen to me at home.

-ROBIN: Mm-hmm.
-Mm.

And I had to completely adapt
to that lifestyle,

had so much anxiety, so much fear.

Hated when people would
recognize me and come up to me or...

want a photo with me
and know that that photo...

-ROBIN: Mm-hmm.
-...is gonna end up on social media.

-There's this pressure too.
-Right. Right.

-KYLA: Yeah.
-'Cause I'm 17, right?

Was it worth me winning this medal?

KYLA: Mm.

Because I had to essentially
give a part of myself away

that I valued so much...

-KYLA: Hmm.
-...and that was just privacy.

-How did you reconcile that?
-By throwing my medal in the trash.

-You know?
-[KYLA CHUCKLES]

-For how long? [CHUCKLES]
-Um, I...

I didn't even feel
the need to go get it.

My mom was about to take the trash out,

-and she's like, "This feels heavy."
-KYLA: Hmm.

Looked in it, and my gold medal was there
and she lectured me for a bit, she's like,

-"You can't do that."
-Wow.

But I think that was tough, right?

Like, at 17,
your life to completely change,

people treating you differently,
people looking at you differently.

It's not normal, and as a teenager,
you're insecure, you're still learning

-a lot about yourself.
-ROBIN: Right.

I had no idea who I was,
I just knew snowboarding.

Thank you for sharing that.

-That's not a dark story.
-KYLA: Yeah.

-[CHUCKLES]
-That's not a dark story at all

-because of the light you are right now.
-CHLOE: Right.

Totally. I think the most important thing
too has just been positivity.

Staying as positive as possible.
Whenever I would get negative thoughts,

I would try to twist it in a way
that made it feel positive, right?

Like, if I was... went through something,
had a really bad day,

I'd be like, instead of just feeling
really bad about it,

I would ask myself,

-"What can I learn from this moment?"
-ROBIN: Hmm.

"What's the takeaway here?"

"What is the universe trying to teach me?"

-ROBIN: Hmm.
-Mm.

CHLOE: Because I don't think
you go through hardships for no reason.

-I genuinely believe...
-Mm.

...everything in life is a lesson,

and sometimes good things happen
but also, bad things happen.

-KYLA: Yeah.
-And so,

I think the only way to keep myself sane
was to try to ask myself,

"What can I learn here?"

-Mm-Hmm. Always.
-'Cause...

Did you go to therapy?

-Oh, yeah. [EXHALES, CHUCKLES]
-RITA: Good.

-I needed therapy.
-Yeah, who hasn't in this room?

-Exactly. No, but I think it's important
-It's great.

-to talk about that too.
-A hundred percent.

Therapy is so important.

-And I'll add... I'll add to that
-[ROBIN CHUCKLES]

because I have never
officially went to therapy.

I grew up always being in the spotlight.

So, I didn't trust
talking to anyone

-about anything that I was going through.
-ROBIN: Oh, wow.

Um, I either thought
that they were going to judge me,

or they were gonna say something,
or they...

there's no way they can
possibly understand. No one's in my shoes.

-No one's dealt with this before.
-ROBIN: Mm-hmm.

And I think just...

Also, I'm a very positive person, and...
My youngest daughter, uh, was a preemie.

And I had her three months early.
So, I went through

-a lot of things after having her.
-RITA: Wow.

And I was never diagnosed
with postpartum.

-But I, essentially, was like...
-Oh, wow.

"...Wait, I'm so positive
and all of these negative...

"I'm thinking all these
negative things about myself,

"what is going on?"

And I didn't realize it until later on.
But I started doing...

things, like I said,
finding things that make me happy,

whether it was going to work out
an hour out of the day,

or, um, speaking affirmations
and making sure

that the positive things
that I'm thinking,

I'm writing down,
I'm saying them out loud.

So, the universe will hear me
and understand me,

-and also communicating...
-ROBIN: Mm.

...a little better
with the people around me.

And learning how to talk
to people about,

whether it's parents
or uncles or siblings,

about certain things
where it's like,

"All right. We did X, Y, and Z
when I was younger, not anymore."

Like... I... let me start, let me...

When it... it comes to my kids,

I'm not afraid to be like,
"Let's talk about..."

You know, "What do you wanna talk about?

What do you want to do?"
'Cause I am their protector.

I'm gonna make sure they're good.
When it comes to my man...

-Somebody... Oh, no.
-[CHUCKLES]

I am his protector. I am this, I am that.

-ROBIN: Yes.
-And him for me.

But I realized
I wasn't doing that for myself.

-RITA: Yeah.
-And it's amazing that you are able

to have that at this age,

um, 'cause not a lot of people...

They get it later,
or they don't get it at all.

I was gonna say they don't get it at all.

Or they don't get it at all. The fact that
you went through that. It's crazy,

because it's like,
we've had similar experiences,

-but not exactly the same...
-[CHUCKLES]

...but it's this...
This is why I love this.

-That's what's beautiful about it.
-KYLA: [CHUCKLES] Yeah.

What works for you.

Friend of mine said to me...
You know how everybody says,

"Life is short," or, "Life is long"?

I have a friend that says,
"Life is finite."

Yeah.

-RITA: We are all going... one day.
-At some point. [CHUCKLES]

-Right.
-[KYLA CHUCKLES]

So, however you use that time
during, uh, this time we have here

-is important.
-Mm.

It was getting diagnosed
with breast cancer

and having bilateral mastectomy
was really a defining moment...

-ROBIN: Hmm.
-...because it's like

the clock is really ticking.

-Mm.
-Um, knowing that,

uh, I was confronted with mortality,

everything gets definitely crystallized,
and, um, focused in a very different way

-when that happens.
-Oh, yeah.

And I get up every morning,
say my prayers of gratitude.

-Thank God that I even woke up.
-Hmm.

-Same thing at night. I go through that.
-Mm.

And that is something
I think I... I do for myself.

But I wanted to ask you,

how did...
how did your breast cancer journey

affect you and how your, like,
how your life changed from it?

-Mm.
-RITA: And then also, what it's like

with Amber right now
and going through this...

-Ah!
-...with someone you love

and you're on the other side of it.

-Where... where's the tissue?
-I can see you!

-I can see you...
-[LAUGHS]

-ROBIN: I could talk about mine...
-RITA: Yeah.

-...and just look at you just... [GRUNTS]
-KYLA: Yeah.

I talk about her,
what she's going through,

and not because her case
is more severe than mine,

it's when you are a caregiver,

it's totally different than when you're,
um, the person, the patient.

I was an athlete going through it.

-RITA: Yeah.
-The doctors were my coaches.

The chemo was the game plan.
and I approached it like that.

It's been very difficult.

Amber, Virgo, Northern California,

-earthy, crunchy, so sensitive.
-[CHUCKLES]

[CHUCKLES]

But, what I learned from myself...
Oh, boy, um...

Stronger than I thought.

I'd never thought I'd...
-Wow.

I'd never thought
I'd hear the words, "You have cancer."

-And I never thought...
-RITA: Mm-hmm.

...if I heard that,

that I would be as strong.
And I'm not embarrassed. I'm... proud...

-RITA: Yeah.
-KYLA: Yes.

-...that I was strong.
-RITA: Yeah.

Um, and it's unnerving when...

Because the... the, uh, medicine
that saved my life,

put it in peril,
and I had an even more...

-RITA: Right. Right.
-...serious condition after breast cancer.

-KYLA: Mm.
-And I was told

I had a year or two to live.

-RITA: Oh!
-But here I am. And that's ten years ago.

-Wow.
-Almost ten years to the day...

-Yay!
-...that I had the bone marrow transplant

-that saved my life, ten years later.
-KYLA: Oh, my gosh.

But, like you, I don't...

If people ask me about it,
I talk about it.

-RITA: Yeah.
-It doesn't define who I am.

-Everybody's got something.
-KYLA: Yeah.

We all have what we've gone through.

It's made me stronger.
It's made me better.

And it hasn't changed me, I think I...
Uh, and Oprah said this and I...

-That's twice we quoted Oprah.
-RITA: Yeah!

-KYLA: [CHUCKLES] Yeah.
-Right? Oprah.

Thank you, Oprah!

It's a good person to quote.

-[CHUCKLES]
-ROBIN: It just...

Something goes like that,

it just accentuates the person
you are to begin with.

-Right.
-ROBIN: It just heightens what's there.

Brings out more of who you are.

-ROBIN: Yes! Yes.
-Yes.

And I feel that it... it has done that.
I'm not gonna say,

"It's the best thing
that ever happened to me."

-Yeah.
-[FORCEFUL CHUCKLE] No, it wasn't!

-[RITA CHUCKLES]
-But I'm glad

it's kind of like
what you were saying, Chloe,

everything happens for a purpose
and you're supposed to learn from it.

-RITA: Right.
-ROBIN: And I learned from that experience

-and I am better for it.
-Same here. Yes.

I'm just better for it.

[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[MUSIC CONCLUDES]

When you talk about longevity,
I was thinking,

"'Okay, I love my day job, I love...
I love saying, 'Good Morning, America.' "

-Yeah. Yes.
-I love trying to bring joy in life.

And I love when we talk about sports
on the show. I just...

Everybody knows my eyes get this big,
and I'm like... [EXCLAIMS]

And so, I... I asked you all,

I know, Chloe,
it's difficult for you at your age

when... when someone says

-"longevity." What is it that you...
-Mm. Mm-hmm.

How does that word...

How do you feel about that?

Does it kinda make you go,
"I just want to stay in the moment,

-"I don't wanna... "
-Yeah.

I think I'm...
I'm such a "in the moment" person

and, um, I like to be present.
I never think super far ahead

-because it gives me anxiety. [CHUCKLES]
-[CHUCKLES]

Um, I... I think
I'm kind of a control freak in a way

where I need to...

-Yeah.
-...know everything and what's going on

and that drives me crazy sometimes.

But, um, I think
I like to appreciate every moment

I get the opportunity to be in,

just like, whether it be
with friends or family or work

or anything, just like,
taking a step back and being grateful

that I, one, get to be surrounded
by incredible people who love

and support me unconditionally.

-And then be given the opportunity...
-Mm. That's huge.

to have a platform
and spread positivity

and... and hopefully inspire
our next generation.

And, um... That's just given me
so much confidence also.

-It's such a good feeling!
-It's such a good feeling,

and I feel so fulfilled,

and just so eager for the future,

that, um, I'm in a really good place.

And so, hell yeah,
I'm gonna walk with my head held high.

I know that I'm... I worked my butt off.

I know that I've sacrificed so much
to gain so much.

And I know that wasn't just me,

-my family did the same for me...
-ALL: Mm-hmm.

...and for my future. And so...

I've... I made it.

I'm good, I'm happy...
-[KYLA CHUCKLES]

and I'm doing everything
that I want to be doing.

Lastly,
to ask you two about longevity,

how you look at it.

Longevity for me is just to be able
to continue doing what I love to do,

and allowing myself to try new things

and being the best that I can
at anything that I touch.

Anything that I'm a part of.

I like to always say,
"I don't half-a*s do nothing...

-[ROBIN CHUCKLES]
-"...I refuse,"

and just... just living
and allowing myself to be happy.

-I'm learning...
-[CHLOE CHUCKLES]

...to chill 'cause I... I...
I don't know how to fully,

but I also love to work. I love to write.

I love to... Well, I guess
writing could be like a chill thing...

-Yeah.
-...as well, so...

I think "chill" is different
for everybody.

-ALL: Yeah.
-You know?

So, I think it's about
what allows you to just relax

-Yes.
-and not think about that chaotic universe

-that we live in.
-KYLA: Yes.

-And also, learning meditation. [CHUCKLES]
-Yeah.

-Oh.
-KYLA: Uh, practicing...

-I learned that.
-Yep!

To me, there's no way
that longevity will not happen

-as long as I have great energy around me.
-ROBIN: Yeah.

And I will continue to stay here.

When people say they're retiring,
I'm always like, "Wait, what do you mean?"

-RITA: I know.
-"How can you retire

"from something that you love to do?"

So, I don't ever see it happening for me.
But we'll see. Maybe like...

-Well, it's like Serena said...
-[KYLA CHUCKLES]

It's like Serena said "Evolving."

-Yes, it's evolving.
-That's what Serena said. Evolving.

-RITA: Evolving.
-Yeah.

-I don't think anybody retires anymore.
-She said that

-Tom Brady started a great trend.
-[ROBIN LAUGHS]

I was like, "Okay, girl, tease us then."

-[CHUCKLES]
-ROBIN: That's it.

Longevity, to me, it's a 24-hour period.
It's literally...

I... I... I... I feel like,
if I'm living each day in the way

that I should be living,

then that just feels like
if it ended tomorrow,

then I had a good long life.

-ROBIN: Mm-hmm.
-I... I can't... I...

My mom lived till 93 and my dad till 89,

so I'm praying
that God will bless me with a long life.

And I want to be that person

that gets to spend that time
with my granddaughters and my kids

-and see them evolve, and...
-ROBIN: Mm.

...we're so many different people
over the course of our lives,

like who I am at 14
when I was doing The Brady Bunch is,

yes, part of me is still that girl,

-but I'm a very different person too.
-Yes.

So, I think it's an embracing
of all the different parts of who we are,

plus, uh, who we're evolving to be.

But I really feel like, uh,
longevity is just...

It's in a 24-hour period.
[CHUCKLES] You know?

-KYLA: I love that.
-And adding them up.

Uh, 'cause you're not really
in control of that.

But I guess if you're saying,

"How do I approach that?"

It would just be... It's hoping to be

living a centered and balanced life...

-...every day...
-KYLA: Mm.

-...the most that I can get to that.
-ROBIN: Yeah.

You're striving for that fulfillment.

-You're right.
-Well, can I just thank you all?

I just... I just love this conversation.

And this is conversations
that we should have more often,

and my mama... [SMOOCHES] Oh!

-RITA: Oh.
-She was 88. She was 88.

She would say, "We all have gifts,
discover yours

"and share it with the world."

-KYLA: Mm.
-Oh, my goodness!

-ROBIN: And it's true. It is true.
-That's so beautiful.

And thank you,
you gave me the gift of time.

-Wow. Thank you.
-KYLA: And thank you for having

a platform like this to where we can come
and sit down and speak about things

and... and learn from the women
that we're... we're speaking with,

-so I appreciate that as well.
-RITA: Yeah.

-CHLOE: Thank you.
-I love that you're doing this.

-I do too.
-We need more of this.

-KYLA: Yes.
-[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

It is okay if you're afraid.

The best things that you do,
you're afraid first.

When was the last time
you were ever really scared?

When I was asked
to be the guest host for Jeopardy.

-[GASPS]
-Oh.

-Okay.
-Oh, my God.

-KYLA: Yeah.
-I was petrified.

And I did not want to do it at first.

And it was friends and others around me,
they'd say, "Oh, okay, you always like,

"telling us to go for it..."

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Yeah.

-[CHUCKLES]
-And so, I had the best time.