01x02 - A Father's Pain

[bunniefuu]

[somber piano plays]

[reporter]

had everything going
for him.

He had a master's degree,
a good job,

but then something went wrong,
and now his father says his son

has confessed to murdering
three people.

I don't believe it.
It's hard to believe.

Um...
he's been good.

I've had no indications that
anything was wrong,

you know, with his life.

It's just hard to comprehend...

what he did,
and yet there's still

love for him
because he is my child.

I can't turn --
I can't turn -- yeah.

[birds chirping]

It brings the memories back

of what took place
in this spot.

The last time I was here
I was bringing the police...

in '95...

and showing them where Scott's
body was because my son had

told me what shaft
he put Scott's body in.

I remember everything that
took place.

When the body bag came up...

there was a smell of death.

It -- you know,
the memory's there,

always will be.

But...
I feel I'm a strong person

and I was taken down...

I was taken down to
the weakest point in my life.

[The Paper Chase's "What's So
Amazing About Grace?" plays]

[TV static crackling]

[strings continue
playing sinister tune]

-[knock at door]
-[creaking]

-[banging on door]
-[creaking]

-[banging on door]
-[creaking]

[fire crackling]

[banging on door]

[sinister chord strikes]

[Ken]
I bought this bar in 1997.

I came to work here in '89.

It's been good to me.

Come to work every day,



When all of this happened
with the m*rder,

and looking for him,

and people knowing that
it was my son...

they were shocked,

that how could --
Robert could have done this.

They're -- they're in disbelief
just like I was.

They know him.

But more so of
how I felt about him,

how he achieved so much,
and then to have this tragedy.

It was a relief to
talk to them.

It was, you could say,
a therapy for me to get it off

my chest rather than bottle it
and think about it,

where a normal person
wouldn't do what he did.

And what his mindset is,
when it came about,

I -- I don't have the answer.

I was concerned when they
arrested him that --

what did I do wrong
that made him become

the person that m*rder*d people?

And even today,
even though it's all done,

you might say,
you still wonder

because there's no cut
and dried answer.

His mother had that
picture taken.

He was a cute kid.

Uh, you know,
there were good moments,

you know, the -- the giggles
and the laughter and, you know,

I mean, still a baby.

To look at the picture
and think back, uh,

when this took place,
there's...

hm.

I'll say there's not
much thought, other than...

the future part of...

what could have been
that went wrong.

When Robert was born,

and you've seen him
and you held him,

and the baby, well, the being
a father kicks in and, yeah,

you had love for your child,

uh, you wanted to be
the father

and then we plan
the next child

'cause we wanted them
close together.

As a young child,
him and his brother would go

with me up to the ranch.
They'd play together.

If they worked with me,
they both worked until they got

bored and then they'd do
what kids do.

You know, they'd play
ball together and,

and run and hide
and stuff like that.

To me,
between Robert and Kenny,

Kenny was
a little more rebellious,

especially down with his mother.
I'll say he was a hellraiser.

When it's just between
the two of them, Robert,

he was the strong one.

To look at him,

if you were there,
he was just a nice,

easygoing kid with
no problems

and just a child that
you're proud to have

because there were
no issues.

Robert was...

they say, upset living with
his mother.

He didn't want to live with her
no more.

So I get the phone call,

and he wants to come
live with us.

He was just a young teenager,
even though he's 12 years old.

You know, I was happy that
he wanted to

come live with us.
We didn't have issues with him.

[pensive music plays]

I feel Robert stood out

because he was a smart kid
in school -- his grades.

It's...

just everything he did
was a positive that...

when he was with
my wife and I,

he just didn't get in trouble.

He'd go in his room to study and
when I went in to check on him

and see if he needed help
or nothing,

he seemed to know
what was going on.

You know, later in life,
uh, he got

a computer and taught himself
the computer,

got the books and learned it
and made programs out of it.

He was that smart.

Nobody recognized that
he was a genius.

Well, in hindsight,
I could look at it and say,

you know what?
He was a genius.

He was that smart of a kid,
not smart alecky.

He was just a smart,
intelligent person,

but you didn't see it.

I could say no more than he was
a good kid that I put up

on a pedestal.

I wanted to take
the chemistry set back

because it wasn't right
to steal it.

It's not the right thing to do.

And I felt by making him
take it back,

it would bestow on him that
you don't steal.

I called out, talked to
the principal, and I said,

I want you to do something
about it.

Put the fear of God in him.

So the principal talked
with him.

He threatened, you know,
the police, but he was,

he was gonna let it go
this time,

but I had hoped that it put some
sort of fear into him

that you don't do it.

I had no reason to think that
he was a bad kid.

Growing up, I learned
what was right

and wrong,
and you think that

you're teaching it to your kids,
you discipline them for things

that they're doing bad
and let them know

that they can't do that.

So I felt that in that sense,
I was letting them know

the difference between
right and wrong.

The reason I brought up these
issues of the chemistry set,

I'm looking for answers of why
did you do what you did,

doing these crimes.

You feel like you did
something in order to make

your son do what he did.

You know, it's just the whole
thing is, is sad, everything.

[dog barks distantly]

[Ken] The ranch,
it's a home away from home.

It's peace of mind.

It's hard to describe just how
much it does mean to me.

With my son bringing Scott up
and disposing of him

the way that he did,

he put a cloud,
a shadow on this place

and all the families involved

and the harm that
he caused them.

[Ken]
Newspaper clippings that people
have given to me.

Some of The Stockton Record that
I've clipped out.

An article that I was given
about a...

I believe it was
a father turned his son in.

I got phone records of
my son during the time

that he was going back and forth
with Scott's body,

uh, to bring him up here
and dump him in the mineshaft.

My wife and I sat down

and put together on
a calendar his movements

and phone calls --
that's in here.

The police had access to that.

When I got started to dig
through this box to get

the articles and let you know
what I had,

it brings up what had happened

It reminds you of all...

the bad.

There was no good in this.

You feel bad, you feel sad.

It brings out the anger again.

In some cases, the doubt.

What's the truth?
What isn't the truth?

Brings back up,
where's the closure?

What's the answer?
That...

"why?"

But I hang on to it.

I ought to burn it,
but I don't wish to.

That's Robert at graduation
and uh,

he was valedictorian
and gave a speech.

But there again, Robert was
a smart person that

achieved things, and this is one
of those examples.

I feel Robert was
a confident person.

I don't know that he had to get
up anywhere to give a speech.

He was the dominant
person when his --

he was with his friends.

He was the one that
was in charge.

Uh, they looked up to him
and it's sort of like they were

the followers and he was
the leader.

After Robert graduated,
he went to work for, uh,

Roadway Trucking down south.

Roadway is a major trucking
company that delivered

freight to
different businesses,

but he was in charge
over several

truck terminal managers.

The impression I got
from him was,

he was happy with his job.
Everything's going well.

And then one day,
I find out that he quit.

He tells me he was working on
a software program

that had to do with trucking.

And that if he had stayed
with Roadway,

they would have claimed it to be
their property

because he invented it

while he was working
for Roadway.

Everything that he accomplished,
yeah, the sky is the limit,

but you figure he was
going places

and gonna be
very successful.

He stopped by,
came in and visited.

When it was time for him
to leave, he said,

"I wanna show you something."

So he went to his car,
and he got the little handgun.

That was a .25,
I believe is what it was.

The only thing I knew Robert
owning other g*ns was

a pellet g*n that I bought him.

I took it and I looked at it.
I said, "That's nice."

I gave it back to him.
I said, "Just be careful."

Then he got into his car
and he left.

But again,
when all this happened,

I remember that day --

him showing me the g*n
and to this day,

I remember that whole scene.

And I just felt like
that meant trouble,

and yet I had no idea
what type of trouble.

It just felt wrong, yeah.

Now,
why would he have it?
I -- I don't know.

I just -- it wasn't right,
you know,

hindsight looking back,
it's like, you know,

something's gonna happen

and that's what I felt
that day,

but I didn't know what.

I was tending bar in
the morning.

I believe it was not long after
the bar opened that he come

walking through the door.

It was very weird for him just
to show up unannounced.

He always called in advance
and said,

"Hey, I'm coming up,"
for whatever reason.

"Are you gonna be
up at the ranch

or are you gonna be home?"

And you see him and,
"Oh, what are you doing?"

And, "Well, I come by to see
you and let you know

I was up at the ranch."

I don't remember hugging him
that day, but he looked dirty.

He just didn't smell bad --
he stunk.

And in hindsight,
having been around dead people,

that's...
to me, is what he smelled like,

but at the time, you don't say,

"God, you smell like
a dead person."

And I asked him if he was
hungry, and yeah.

So we went down
and got a small pizza.

We ate it.

And he says,
"Well, I'm gonna go home."

I said, "OK," and he left.

There was nothing to think...

anything else than what
he told me -- that he'd gone up

the ranch and came out.

About 2 months later,
my father had a heart attack.

I drove him to the hospital.

He was in a room when I get
the phone call.

Hello?

[Ken]
And it was my younger son
Kenny telling me that they were

looking for Robert
because he k*lled somebody,

and I -- I said,
"Wait a minute, what?"

He says,
"They're looking for Robert

because he k*lled somebody."

While he's telling me that,

I'm not putting
two and two together.

It was hard to digest
and realize that he was actually

talking about Robert.
He was the angel.

He was the one
that didn't do no wrong.

You're thinking
that there was a mistake,

that this can't be true,
you know,

you're in disbelief that even
we're talking about this.

It just couldn't happen.

I've got 30 years since
it happened.

And it's like out of sight,
out of mind,

but there's still stuff that
reminds you.

I've never known anybody

that a family member
or a child of theirs

has ever m*rder*d anybody.

When the murders happened
and that person

that did the murders
was my son Robert,

there was a moment in there
that I wished...

we never had him.

Robert...
was a good kid.

He's never done anything that
I'd be ashamed of.

This is the only thing
in his life

that I know of
that has affected me...

to the degree that
I was ashamed

to be his father.

I believe that people can do
evil things,

but with Robert,
I never saw the evil

until all of this
came about.

[reporter]
Police all over the West
had been looking for


Acremant was wanted by police
in Medford, Oregon, for

the murders of Roxanne Ellis
and Michelle Abdill,

real estate women and l*sbian
activists whose bodies were

found in the bed
of Ellis's truck.

[reporter #2]
Acremant also k*lled
a Visalia man,

a man who was last seen with
Acremant two months ago.

[Ken]
When I saw the U-Haul, I said,
"That's gotta be Robert."

And with that thought, it was,
if I go in the house

with my g*n,

it's like, do you go in
with your g*n drawn

because you're
capturing somebody?

Do you go in
with your g*n

and he hears the door
and he pulls his g*n out,

not knowing who's there.

This goes through your head.

The last thing I wanted to do
was sh**t my son or possibly

both of us get shot.

So I just drove past,
went around the block.

I never thought about
helping him get away.

Once I was there, it's like
you wanted to catch him

because you want to
know why,

and you didn't want him to do
harm to anybody else.

So those are my thoughts is,
you know,

he needs to be caught.

I had the choice.

I could have aided
and abetted and,

you know, get out of town,
but it wasn't easy,

and we fall back to that right
and wrong of growing up.

And it was wrong in
what he did.

Then I chose to use
the phone and call the police.

And it's probably
the hardest thing I ever did.

Yeah.

Well, some people would say
I didn't love him

because I turned him in,
and that's wrong.

I loved him and I was worried
about other people dying

for no reason.

It's just not
the right thing, so,

uh, I had to put a stop to it.

[reporter #2]
Police arrested Acremant early
this morning after

a family member tipped police
that he was in the area.

[reporter #3]
They even had
the license number of

the U-Haul truck he was driving.

[reporter #4]
Sir, did you commit
these murders?

[reporter #5]
What can you tell us?

[Ken] At the time all this was
coming to light,

is -- you don't think about,
here's my son I've had so high,

and now I'm down at the bottom.
You're dealing with...

this in disbelief.

You don't want to believe it.

Everything I've learned that was
going on in his life was

the first time
when these murders occurred.

I learned that he was in debt,
took a while,

but found out he was in debt
over $100,000 on credit cards.

His business failed when he --
when he did the software,

made the software of
the trucking, you know --

it failed.

I had to believe
he k*lled for money.

[reporter] They just lowered
a 2nd rescue worker

down the shaft
to help recover a body.

[Ken]
Bothers you that he brought
Scott's body up

and dumped him down
the mine shaft

on the ranch property --
that bothers you,

you know, and again,
every time you go up there,

you see the mine shaft,
and you can't help
but think about

what took place.

I wanted to talk to Robert, uh,
what's going on?

Why is it going on?
What did you do?

Why did you do it?
I mean, a bunch of questions.

I think that the police
might have told him

that I told them that
he was in the U-Haul,

so I turned him in.

Because that was
the question that he asked me.

"Did you turn me in?"

And I said, "Yes, I did."

He said, "I will eff
your life up."

And I think that was the end of
the conversation.

And then after that's when all
the bad letters started
coming up.

He sent
The Stockton Record a letter.

Well, I got my mail,
The Stockton Record got theirs.

They just said as
a child, he was molested.

If you think of it sexually,
he wrote it down.

That he was gonna
eff my life up.

And then I got phone calls from
Medford Police,

Stockton Police, Visalia Police.
I got phone calls from Hawaii.

I got phone calls
from New York

wanting to know
if I molested my son.

[producer]
That's the letter he wrote to
The Stockton Record.

Yeah.

My earliest moments
were during 5-6

when my father
Ken Acremant began

fondling me sexually.

This stress led to bedwetting,
which also drew punishment,

severe beatings with a ruler,
and being stood in front of

the living room window naked
all day for all to see.

He was trying to destroy my life
because he felt that

I destroyed his.

He's upset.
I understand that part of it.

Did I give it any thought that
he would go this route?

Nope.

But when he sent me the letter,
he also sent a letter to

The Stockton Record,
explaining what

I did to him,
his stepmom did to him,

what we forced him to do.

He accused me of s*d*mizing him,
him having sex with my wife,

being forced to watch
porno movies,

him being forced to watch
his dog have sex with my wife.

I took it as...

"I'm writing this to hurt you,"
you know,

not for any other reason,
you know, because he --

he wanted to get under my skin.
He wanted me to feel guilty.

Comes down
do you believe it or not.

I know what took place,
and I know it never happened.

Not a lot of people said
anything about it other than,

you know, "How could he do
that to you?"

I was mad.
I was angry.

I wanted, I think I wanted
to k*ll him.

I was so pissed at him.

Everybody asked me
if it was true,

and all I can tell 'em was no,
it's not true, but, uh, again...

he was hurt,
and he wanted to hurt back.

I think any parent
that has to go through

what I have gone through,

you have to wonder,

was it something I did?

Why would he write letters?

Because that's not how
he was brought up

and where he went wrong,
I have no idea.

So now it doesn't
make sense to me.

Why are you k*lling people?

I didn't look at it like,
"You're a k*ller."

You're my son,
and I wanna know why.

What have I done?
What happened?

And you don't know, you know.

At first, I'm taking the blame.

I'm -- I'm trying to figure out
what I did,

and everybody's told me,
"You didn't do nothing."

And I realized
I didn't do nothing.

There was a point there
I felt like

I did something to the point
of breaking down.

I felt like taking my life.

I didn't tell nobody.

But...

that's just how wrapped up
you get,

that you can't deal with it.
End it.

I said I wasn't gonna
do this.

No, it's not me.

I wanted to
say something to him.

I wanted to say it
in person to him.

I felt that I had to.

I couldn't turn...

say in the court
at that time

and plead for his life.

In this case here,
I didn't run from the problem.

I dealt with the problem
of turning him in.

That was the problem of
turning him in to

stop him from murdering people.

I believed the eye for an eye.

I believed in
the death penalty,

and I couldn't beg for his life
because that's not me.

The day I got up to read it,
I was very nervous.

It was hard...

to stand there
and read the letter,

knowing that your son was going
to get the death penalty.

First, I'd like to say to
the George family, along with

the Ellis and Abdill families...

[clears throat]

...how sorry I am
for the horrendous crimes

my son committed against
your families

and loved ones.

Robert,
I've never told you

how deeply you have hurt
your mother, brother, myself,

and so many other people.
You can't even count them.

The day I learned and knew
you committed these crimes,

my heart was torn from my chest.

All the hopes and dreams
as a father...

as for his son were gone.

I am still your father,
so I will be here for you.

I only hope,
you could be put to death for

the crimes you committed,
that I would have passed before.

For this would only be...
[voice breaking].

For this would only be
a double stab in my heart.

Robert, you are my number
one son.

I held you so high.

You achieved so much in life,
yet threw it away.

Where only through our Lord

can your soul be saved for
the crimes you committed

against other humans.

I'll always love you.

That was tough that day to
have to do that, but I said it.

And...

I felt better after saying it.

I wanted him to die
in a sense

because he m*rder*d people.

I've told everybody
I am for the death penalty.

He's just not
that person out k*lling people

just to be k*lling them --

he k*lled for money,
but it was wrong and if he ended

life in prison,
that's one thing.

If he got the death penalty,
that was another,

and there's nothing I could do
about it, and I wasn't going to

go beg for it,
and I'm sure he thought

I should be on
his side, help him out,

do what I could.

But he did it to himself.

Yeah, that's him.

If you look at
the other pictures, he's put on

an awful lot of weight.

One of the officers in
the prison took the pictures,

so he's on one side of
the glass, I'm on the other.

Once the trials were over and
he was in Oregon prison, Salem,

a period of time went by,
and I had this urge.

I just had to see him.

That's when I went up
and talked to him.

And to me, it's like
having to go --

I mean, it was
a driving force.

Nothing was gonna hold me back.
I had to go see him.

It was something in me
I couldn't let go.

And I wanted answers.

There was just a feeling, like
a drive that I needed to

see my son.

And not for
any particular reason,

not to apologize for anything
I've said or done or how I ever

treated him in life.

I just needed to see him,
you know.

If the window wasn't there,

and you're meeting in that
same room, I, on my part,

I would have hugged him.

I don't know if
he would have wanted it.

Got in to see him, and
that lasted about 15 minutes.

I wanted to leave
because I mean --

it was a mental state
that he was in.

I don't know if he was
putting on

a show or he was actually
falling apart, mentally.

Then he started to
go off the edge

and talk about people
behind the wall

and that they're listening
and they know

what you're gonna say
before you say it.

And I'm thinking,
where's this crap coming from?

And he would continue with that.

I said, Well, this isn't
the person I come to see

and I can't stand this.
It's all he's talking about.

I wanted to leave.

After that visit was
the last time I spoke with him.

When Robert died in prison,
I came and placed Robert here in

the grave in my plot --
my -- my family plot.

He's part of the family still.

I haven't abandoned him.

I put flowers on him, uh,
every year on him.

I put flowers on his grave
because Robert's still my son

regardless of what he did.

To learn the things
that he did,

I don't look at it as
you're tearing him down off that

pedestal I had him on.
He's already fallen.

But I still care
an awful lot about him.

It is difficult,
even though he's dead,

it's difficult to wipe him
out of your mind,

that he never was there.

Because he was there and I was
proud of that person.

I do believe in heaven and hell
and that there's gotta be

a God that's created all this.

Everybody would hope that
they're members in heaven.

I hope he's there,
but that's not my choice.

You know, if there's a God,
and I believe there's gotta be

somebody higher than me
that's created all this,

then he'll answer to him.

I'll say I think about it all
the time, but not every day,

but it's on your mind.

Even today -- what did I do?

Why?
If it was all about money.

But then you say, well,
could I have helped him?

I could have given him money.

No, the only thing I got was
a transcript of

when I was there.

[producer]
Go ahead when you're ready.

First time I've ever seen
any of this stuff,

but these are clips that puts
a different light

on what I was
told by a lot,

uh, that you know,
he says he was [bleep],

wanted to k*ll, uh...

We didn't see it.
We didn't know it.

I don't know that I got any
emotion right now, uh...

I didn't know he was
a serial k*ller.

Uh...

I would hate to go up there
and dig his plot up

because I'm pissed at him.

I could take it and dig it up
and put him down in

the mineshaft,
I guess, but...

Take him out of
the family plot.

But, it's not that I don't love
him anymore.

[stammers] --
less, he's my child.

I look at him differently
as he's a serial k*ller.

If I were to look back,

I'd blame myself in a way
for not being

the best parent
I could have been

because I've been
a workaholic all my life by

going and tending bar at night.

We just didn't do
a whole bunch together outside

of I worked, he went to
school, so it wasn't

a lot of fun time playing as
much as it was working.

[indistinct media chatter]

[Ken]
Because you feel like for him to
do this, how his parents,

what did we do wrong?

So you lose that bond of
a family.

I regret that part of it, uh,
not being there when you feel

like you should have
been there.

So to blame myself, yeah,
there's blame for myself.

I don't forgive him.

Those are crimes that you don't
forgive people,

you know,
there's a punishment to it,

and he was given his punishment.

They just didn't have time to
carry it out

before he died in jail.

But...

you know, how did it
changed my life?

Well, it changes it to where
you're pissed off,

you don't sleep,
it's on your mind all the time.

So, as time goes on, well,
it gets a little easier,

but you still think
about it today,

and here we sit today, uh,
talking about it.

It's like...

it -- it's like
people think, I guess,

that I should write him off of

my life for what he did.

And I can't do it.

There -- there's no words.

Yeah, I -- I carry the weight.

Don't ever --
I don't think ever

I'll have peace with what
took place.

My son is morphing into
something I did not recognize.

It was just wasn't Timmy,
there's two people there.

I was like "This is not normal.
What is wrong with my son?"

I swear to God.

it is so hard
to make anyone believe,

but I was looking at a devil.