02x06 - The Limits of Honor

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MASAMEER COUNTY

God bless you all for coming today.

My name is white man's colon.

I'm here on behalf of Motlaq Al Feesh.

The b*stard left his people to live
among the British for over 30 years.

He kicked the bucket last week.

As his legal representative, I'm here
to fulfill the only demand in his will.

To find a husband for his daughter,
Al Jawhara.

Any man who thinks he's a fit
should step forward now.

Hey, guys. The girl's loaded.

- She won't marry anyone but me!
- Al Jawhara is mine!

That's me, guys!

- Life is finally smiling on me.
- Don't forget me, brother.

- Damn you, man!
- I'm a distant relative, brother.

- God bless you all.
- Wait a minute, gentlemen!

What the...

What the hell!

- That's what I'm talking about.
- Great news.

And what's the second option?

I don't understand.

- What's he saying?
- We'll do some tests.

- What kind of tests?
- What tests?

He says the girl has cold feet.

Why didn't he tell us before?
Now you're telling me "cold feet"?

It mean reservations, man.
The girl has some reservations.

What reservations?
Are we sick or lacking something?

What the hell are you talking about?

What the hell is open-minded?

How open-minded are we talking?

It's already been decided.

- It's not up to you.
- Al Jawhara is mine.

Let me tell you something.
She wants a man with exposure...

No matter how long you live,
you won't take Al Jawhara.

- She's mine.
- ...international culture, which you lack.

Bring it on. You think you know me well?

Your rival is better than you.

- There's no shame in surrendering.
- Don't even dream of it.

What's with all the cameras?

What's this?

I believe it's a cream.

Translate, Juffer.

He wants us to put it on our faces.

Really?

He thinks we've never done it before.

Why wouldn't we use it?
Because it's for women?

There's nothing wrong with it.
Us men take care of our skin too.

This cream is silky smooth.

- What did he say?
- It's a hair-removal cream!

Damn him!

What's a man worth without a mustache?

Bonaparte, Putin, Napoleon--

They're all clean-shaven yet fearless men.

If hair was a sign of class,
it wouldn't grow on your...

Maneea, do you know what all this is?

Forks and knives and--

- Why do you ask?
- Know what to do with them?

You'll start crying if I tell you.

Honestly, I tried to help him,
but he refused.

The guy's an as*h*le.

What a liar. He's been eating
with his hooves since birth.

LABORATORY

What's taking them so long?

Hey, British guy!

What's next?

Like on airplanes?

- Test?
- What did we just do then?

What's that?

Pork? I swear I know that word.

- God! How did you bring it to Riyadh?
- Translate, damn it!

- No, Maneea!
- Praise God!

g*dd*mn you!

I can't...

I ate rice with it.

Slandering, gossiping,

stealing from orphans,
even drinking alcohol--

These are sins a Muslim might commit
and ask for God's forgiveness,

but I would never have a pig
in my blood and belly!

- What did he say?
- Check the room

to make sure there are no peepholes
so no one can see you.

It's just an empty room
except for silence and a fridge.

It's locked!

Can I keep my boxers on?

g*dd*mn this b*stard! What's he saying?

Did I hear him right?

Butt naked, Maneea.

- Butt naked.
- To hell with him!

So I won? Can I get dressed and leave now?

- What?
- I won't let you win.

Let's see what you're going to do.

I'll never wear this.

I'd rather die in this place
than wear this.

Well said, as*h*le.

Lynx? Sure.

I already ate pig meat.

A piece of fabric won't make a difference.

What's important is that I won.

What's going on?

I said I'd never wear it,
no matter what it takes.

Excellent.

And?

What's he saying?
I swear, I'll stab him in--

- They want to bring in a third contender.
- Third contender? Who and where is he?

Good afternoon.

Screw you, sh*t-face.

What about the death pit, pit of honor?
Is it still on the table?

We're screwed.

Beet juice helps lower blood pressure.

Who will you choose, Juffer?

Why is it any of your business?

- You'll choose before me. Just tell me.
- No, I'm not going to.

- Tell me, because my eye's on the Jew.
- No way. The Jew's mine.

- Take the Sikh. He looks nice.
- Not even if he was a Sikh kebab.

- I want what's best for you.
- No, you don't. The Jew's is mine.

I'm ready to choose.

I choose the one with the beautiful soul,
the brilliant mind,

my equal in every way:

my sister, number seven.

And I choose the woman next to her.

And I want the next woman.

You're an underdeveloped embryo.

You're barbarians,
controlled by animal instincts.

Don't you want to apologize?

Tell me, do men create anything
other than wars and famines?

You're all criminals...

Sure. We've seen many cases like these.

People's blood pressures rise,
and then they go into a coma.

Only God can help them.
It could last for years.

But tell me, which channel
will broadcast this interview?

She didn't bother me.

Turns out she had some
residual misogynistic ideas.

She's totally misogynistic.



Where are we, Maneea?

You've been in a coma
for the past 25 years.

Long story short,
the world has become totally woke.

The left wing is not extremist!

The moderate left wing
rules the world now,

a world with no place for you two.

Sorry. I just got triggered.

Too much testosterone in this place.

Bottom line,

you've got two options:

You can get an injection that will cause
irreversible chemical castration,

or you can k*ll yourselves.

Which do you choose?

Manhood is like an extended cord.

What?

Manhood is like an extended cord!

Pity those who don't have enough stored.

Bravo. Well done.

- Congratulations.
- I hope you're not one of those...

- No, I swear I'm not one of them.
- What's going on?

For what?

What show?

Where's Al Jawhara?

What about our contract?

What is this b*stard saying?

They filmed us and want to sell it.

Sell it? Who would buy such a show?

THE LIMITS OF HONOR