16x09 - Episode 9

[bunniefuu]

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Good evening. Welcome to
Would I Lie To You?

The show that sorts the facts
from the fibs.

On Lee Mack's team tonight,
from You're Fired,

we've HIRED comedian Tom Allen.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And here to make a good impression,
it's Taskmaster champion

Morgana Robinson.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And on David Mitchell's
team tonight,

Question Of Sport captain and
former England rugby legend

Ugo Monye.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And former Blue Peter presenter
and Saturday morning superstar

Sarah Greene.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

So to Round 1, Home Truths,
where our panellists

read out a statement from
the card in front of them.

To make things harder,
they've never seen the card before.

They've no idea
what they'll be faced with.

It's up to the opposing team to sort
the fact from the fiction

and, Ugo, you're first up.

Possession. OK.

There's a box under your desk.

Could you take the item
out of the box,

pop it on the desk
and then read the card?

Ah.

Aww! Aww!

This was my lucky mascot, Thumper.
When I played for England,

he had his own seat on the coach
next to me and was always

the last person I looked in the eye
before leaving the dressing room.

AUDIENCE CHUCKLE
Wow. Lee's team. TOM: Wow.

Can we get him? Yes.
Let's see your sporting prowess.
LEE: But don't throw it forward!

No! Do not throw it forward,
otherwise, that will be a foul.

LAUGHTER

You could pass it to me, if you
want. Team play. Yes, of course.

Catch it, please. That's quite a
thrill for me. Thank you. Thumper.

What?!

Be careful with Thumper!

Be careful.

Oh, Morgana. Oh, Morgana,
what are you doing? I wanted to...

Of all the places you could look!
LAUGHTER

LEE: What does it smell of?

Success! Yes.
LAUGHTER

I would, like... I would imagine
if it... If this was...

It would smell of, like, jockstraps
and sweat. What?!

LAUGHTER
And just...

...mud. Mud and general... Wow.

Where did he come from, Ugo?
Where did you acquire him?

Had him as a child.
As a child. Mm.

So a gift from a kindly parent
or relative. Hang on!

"This belongs to Johnny Wilkinson."
What does that mean?

LAUGHTER
So, how long have you had him?

About 25 years. OK.

Keep an eye on his face.
Would that annoy you a bit?

Sorry?
LAUGHTER

I'm just checking out
if that annoys you.

LAUGHTER

Well, it seems you're not
that bothered, doesn't it?

Look, I'm doing that. Ohh! Oh!
LAUGHTER

So, you said he sat next to you on
the coach. How did that come about?

So, I started playing rugby aged 13
when I went to boarding school

and he came along with me and
he was a comfort to me at school.

Right. Can I give him back now?
I feel like... No, no, no, no!

But you can't, cos you're going to
toss him. No, no, don't worry.

No, no. You don't!
I'll pretend it's... No! No.

No! It's a conversion. No!
It's a conversion! No, you can't!

LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH
You can't do that.

LAUGHTER AND GASPS
SARAH: No! You can't.

APPLAUSE
Not... Are you clapping?!

Oh! Oh!
AUDIENCE GROANS

APPLAUSE

All right.
So, what do you think, Morgana?

I don't think the bunny smells
right. It smells too clean.

It smells like it's out of
a kid's toy shop.

What do you think, Tom?

I think that you'd be terrified,
be very scared of being bullied

at the age of 13, going away
to boarding school.

The last thing you want to do
is attract attention to yourself

by bringing out your
thumping rabbit.

LAUGHTER
Lee?

I think I'm going to go with my team
and say that is a lie.

OK. Ugo, were you telling us
the truth or was it a lie?

Lie. Nice.
APPLAUSE

Morgana, you're next.

As a teenager, I could do such
a good impression of my mum,

I used to phone my school
and tell them I was sick

so I could bunk off for the day.

LAUGHTER
Wow. David's team.

Could you do an impression
of her now?

AUSTRALIAN ACCENT: Oh, hello.

This is, um...
This is Morgana's mother, Cheryl.

No, you're doing it Australian.
LAUGHTER

Is your mother Australian?
Yes, actually, David.

OK. Al right. Just...
LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

I thought I had better check.

'Ll tell you what.
'L be the receptionist

and I'll answer and you do what
you would have done, OK? OK.

It's ringing. Oh, sorry.
LAUGHTER

Good morning,
Young Offenders Institute.

LAUGHTER

Hello, Janet! How are you?

Oh, I'm very well as it goes.
Oh, that's good. Who is this?

It's Cheryl. It's Morgana's mother.
Oh, Morgana's mother, yes!

Yeah, please don't let everyone
know my real name is Cheryl

because I don't like it.
LAUGHTER

My name is Cher.
That's how I like it.

Just take the "ryl" off, please,
cos it makes me seem old.

I suppose if you could
Turn Back Time, you'd have, er...

LAUGHTER
Oh, Janet, you're so funny!

Yeah. Um...

I've got some bad news, I'm afraid.

Morgana's not very well.

Oh! Both her legs have fallen off

and, um, we're sewing them
back on slowly,

so I think maybe by tomorrow week,
she'll be back in, all right?

That's absolutely fine because
we trust the parents implicitly.

Thank you very much, Cher.

You're welcome, Janet.
Have a lovely day.

Thank you. You have a lovely day,
too. OK, take care. Bye, Janet.

All right. Thank you for calling.
Take care. All right, then.

OK. Take care. Bye-bye.
What are you doing later? Oh...

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

So...

So you phoned and
they would fall for it?

They did fall for it,
but once they didn't.

Right. So what happened?

Basically, I bragged about it
and someone dobbed me in.

Oh, no. Who did you brag to?
To everyone in the bogs.

But you weren't going to school.

LAUGHTER
What, you just...

No, it's when I came back the next
week. You popped into the loos,

"I must tell everyone!"
LAUGHTER

"The reason I'm not
at school today..."

No, I came in limping and then...
Everyone says, "Are you all right?"

And then we got into the bogs
and I was like, "Joking!

"Look, I'm just walking!
I'm normal. I'm fine."

What I think is that one of them
told the teacher.

What age were you?
Like, the naughty age.

Like, sort of, like, 15?

Did you get suspended?
What was your punishment?

No, I didn't get suspended.
I got gated.

Gated? What does that mean?

Well, because I was at
boarding school, as well.

Very hard to phone in sick
when you're at boarding school.

LAUGHTER
How does that work?

No, that doesn't work.
It's like part-boarding,

so you can go away for the weekend.
Flexi-boarding. Yeah.

But that can't be like,
"Do you fancy boarding tonight?"

LAUGHTER
"Or are you going to head home?"

It is quite flexible.
Yeah, that is flexi-boarding.

Night-by-night flexible? Yes!

At the end of school, you can go,
"Do you know what?

"I think I might just, er, head to
one of the rooms upstairs."

LAUGHTER
"Maybe catch a burger in the bar.

"Or, no, I think I'm heading
home tonight."

LAUGHTER
All right. Ugo.

Do you think she has told
us the truth?

Erm...

LEE: It's not written
on the ceiling!

Yeah.
LAUGHTER

I think it's a lie.

You think it's a lie? Yeah.

And you think...? Lie.

OK. We're going to say it's a lie.

Morgana, were you telling the truth
or were you telling a lie?

It is, in fact, a lie.

Oh! Well done.
APPLAUSE

Yes, it's a lie.

Morgana didn't pretend to be
her mum to bunk off school.

Tom, you're next.

My boxing coach tells me
I have a very strong left hook.

LAUGHTER

David's team.
SCATTERED APPLAUSE

Are we to take it that you're saying
you're having boxing lessons?

Yeah, I do have a boxing coach,
yeah.

What do you do in the coach...
I punch someone's hands.

Show me what your left hook is.

LAUGHTER BUILDS

That's good.

You look slightly like you're
holding some cards
in a game of Whist.

LAUGHTER
Hey, Tom. Tom.

Do you want to stand up
and take the stage?

Yes, I would love to.
Would you like my little hands up?

I would love your hands, actually.
Thank you very much. Or...

Or the sportsman in the room!

All right.
LAUGHTER

Not David. No, David, I meant Ugo.

There you go. Look at the difference
in those two men standing up.

Incredible.

Thank you. No, no...

Oh, hang on.

Is it too late to put a bet on?
LAUGHTER

Can I get a left hook?

HOWLS OF LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE
Yeah! The sound of it!

I could hear the slap from here!

LAUGHTER

Didn't hurt. AU right. Well,
thank you for that demonstration.

Did that hurt? Did it sting?

Well. David's team,
what do you think?

Ugo, you felt Tom's left hook there.
Barely. Barely.

So you wouldn't say it was
remarkable in its power?

No, it's definitely inaccurate.

Yeah.

How often are you training
with this coach? Um...

twice a week. Twice a week?

And which week was that?
LAUGHTER

Why did you decide to go
for boxing as a sport?

Um, because...l didn't like
all the other sports.

I like boxing, cos I do some
boxing training, as well.

So, tell us, how would you coach me?

Well, apparently you're so perfect
you don't even need coaching!

LAUGHTER

Well, that's an interesting
coaching technique.

Yeah, I know. It's unusual.

You undermine the confidence
of the boxer with sarcasm. Yes.

Imagine that. "Oh, you think
you're such a great boxer?"

"Well, well done!"
LAUGHTER

"Why don't you go and knock out
Mike Tyson? I'm calling a cab."

Tell us what he puts you through.

The window. The window!
LAUGHTER

We tend to do just a few
combinations.

You know, maybe I'll do uppercut,
uppercut, uppercut.

LAUGHTER
Left, right, left. Oh, goodness!

That looked quite handy.

There's the two stances,
isn't there? There's, er, forepaw

and, um...er, the other one.
What? I think one's southpaw.

No, that's just outside Liverpool.
LAUGHTER

All right.
What's the voice of sport thinking?

I think he's lying.

Well, I think, unluckily for Tom,
we've got specialist knowledge

of boxing because we
all know what it is.

LAUGHTER

Do you think it's true?

Yeah.

And I know... Sorry, you...
..nothing about boxing.

Well, I mean, demonstrably.

But I just...

...that he is leading you up
the garden path.

But he also demonstrated
a left hook.

Yes, but he can act!
Obviously, Tom's very clever,

and he might try and seem
deliberately feeble,

but what we have to believe to start
with is that he deliberately

took up boxing as an activity,
firstly... True, true.

...and secondly, that his coach said
that he had a very good left hook.

Strong. Very strong.
Very strong?!

Well, there's one of two things.

Either Tom is lying
or his coach is lying.

LAUGHTER
SARAH: Well...

Yeah.

OK, David, what's it going to be?

Well, I think we're going to go lie.
Yeah. All right. Tom,

they think it's a lie.
Was it a lie or was it the truth?

I'm afraid I'm going to
have to block that

because it was the truth! Yes!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yes!

It's true.

Tom's boxing coach says
he has a very strong left hook.

And just so you know,
he just said he wasn't bluffing.

That was his good one.

LAUGHTER
Wow.

Our next round is called This Is My,
where we bring on a mystery guest

who has a close connection
to one of our panellists.

This week, each of David's team
will claim it's them that has

the genuine connection to the guest,
and it's up to Lee's team to spot

who is telling the truth.

So, please welcome this week's
special guest, Emma.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

So, Ugo, what is Emma to you?

This is Emma.

When I broke my arm doing
something I shouldn't,

I told her I just had a headache.

LAUGHTER

Sarah, how do you know Emma?

This is Emma.

When I accidentally dropped Gordon
the Gopher in the River Thames,

she had to make an emergency
replacement.

And finally, David, what
is your relationship with Emma?

This is Emma.

And she let me sound the foghorn
on Britain's tallest lighthouse.

LAUGHTER

So, there we have it.

Lee's team, where will you begin?

I think we'll have to start
with Ugo.

So, first of all, what
shouldn't you have been doing?

Erm, riding a bike.

It wasn't my bike.
It was a friend's bike,

and I took it without permission.

So, where was this?

I was at boarding school.

Talk us through the accident.
Erm...

I was racing my friend and I
slammed on the brakes and went

over the handlebars.

So, this mate you're with, nothing

to do with the mate whose bike
you've nicked?

No.
People have more than one friend.

Yes.
Oh, I wish.

LAUGHTER

Now, who is this lady?

Er, Emma used to be the matron
at the boarding house we were at.

Why couldn't you just tell
her the truth?

Because I felt
bad that I'd stolen...

...sorry, borrowed the bike.

Hang on. So, you've got a broken
arm and you're like,

"Oh, my headache is terrible!

"Don't mind if I just go
and have a lie down.

"This? It's nothing.
Don't worry about me.”

I was really tough as a kid.

Well, you're saying all the right
words for tough kid.

Yep.
Boarding school, matron...

So, yeah. I said I had a
headache and went and had a sleep.

Why did you have to say
anything to her?

Because to get any
sense of medication,

I had to report it to
someone at the boarding house.

Ah, so you were after some
painkillers? Yeah.

So, you go and knock
on matron's door -

are you right-handed or left-handed?

Right-handed.
And which arm was broken?

My right arm.

Talk us through the conversation.
I'll be matron.

KNOCKS
Hi, matron.

Come in! You did that
with your left hand!

Yeah, because I broke my right.
Oh, the right one.

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

Ugo!

Lovely to see you.
Yeah, lovely to see you, too.

Are you well? None of your business.
I'm much older than you.

Talk to me with some respect.

Ugo, are you OK?
I've just got a bit of a headache.

Could I get some paracetamol,
please?

Ooh, what's happened?
Have you been playing rugby again?

Yes. That's not going to make
you any money, is it?

I know.

Actually it doesn't, does it?
It really doesn't.

Doesn't it? Well, no, it does now.
It didn't used to.

It used to be an amateur sport,
then it turned professional.

He got all the money, but all...

in the old days, they did
it for fun.

Suckers!

So, I give you the tablet.

So you, then, what do you do,
you walk away?

I walked away and then had a nap.

Then what happens?
Woke up...

...throbbing.

Oh, I know that feeling.
Stop it!

I woke up and then had to tell
her I was telling a fib.

Oh, you told her the truth, then?

Yeah, I had to tell her the truth
in the end.

Now, how did she...?
I'll tell you how she reacted.

Knock on the door.
KNOCKS

You'll be getting five of the best.

What was that?
That's a cane, a bendy cane.

Oh, I thought you
were twisting my n*pples.

Twisting n*pples.

LAUGHTER

"Ah! I've broken my arm,
what are you doing?!”

What does she do now?
We went to hospital.

What hospital?
Basingstoke, erm...

A&E.

That's not how you
spell Basingstoke.

All right. Who would
you like to quiz next?

Sarah, can you remember
what you said?

So, when I accidentally dropped
Gordon the Gopher...

Ah, yes.

...into the River Thames...
Yeah.

...I had to get Emma to make
an emergency replacement.

Now, you probably don't know
who Gordon the Gopher is,

do you, Morgana?

Oh, it's a fluffy thing.
Yeah.

We've got a little photograph
for people who are unsure.

Yeah. So, Gordon the Gopher
was in the broom cupboard

with Phillip Schofield.

He was also on Going Live,
wasn't he? Oh, was he?

Was Gordon the Gopher
on Going Live?

Yes. When Phillip stopped being in

the broom cupboard and came out
into the studio...

Wow, that was...

You know what you're doing.

Very clever.

We worked on a show together
called Going Live

and Gordon was very much
a part of that show.

We were going to take pictures
of Gordon, Phillip and me in various

landmarks around London.

So, Phil and I went out on Friday,
the day before the show,

with a photographer,
and we're on Westminster Bridge,

Phillip was there and I was there
and I think Phillip was holding him,

or at least I thought
Phillip was holding him.

He thought I was holding him.
Oh, no.

And Gordon fell
into the River Thames.

Oh, no. Wow.
Happens with kids all the time.

"I thought you had him."

So, how does Emma come into it?

Well, Emma comes into
it because Emma...

...works in...
..was...

...Olympic diving champion.

LAUGHTER
No. No, no.

Emma was back at the BBC,

worked in the wardrobe department,
made lots of props -

if they involved cloth.

And she had to work all night to
get Gordon finished and ready

for the show at nine o'clock the
next morning. You make it sound like

she's making R2--D2 - it's not
the most challenging thing, is it?

I believe Sarah here,
for two reasons.

A - it's end of play on Friday,
so there's no time to go

to the shops - firstly.

Second thing we need to talk
about here -

Emma clearly works in wardrobe.

Look how fabulously she's dressed.

Aw!
Thank you, Emma.

APPLAUSE
Thank you.

Now, this must have gone down very
badly with the show's producer.

They didn't find out...
Oh.

...straight away.

The person we were really
worried about finding out

was a gentleman called Paul Smith.

And Paul Smith was Gordon.

The hand.
Oh.

You couldn't tell him
that it wasn't going

to be the real Gordon.
Oh, really? Ah.

And now, Paul is head of compliance
for the BBC, and this is the first

time that he will know...
That it's a different gopher.

...it was a different gopher.

What a career trajectory!

He's the hand up Gordon the Gopher
and now he's the head of compliance.

I know!
What did he do in between,

make all the pies for the canteen?

All right. What about David?

David, remind us of your claim.

Well, I was going up the tallest
lighthouse in Britain.

Yes.
And Emma let me sound its foghorn.

Gosh. OK. Oh, come on!

It's just an excuse to say horn.

None of this is real.

It's Sarah's story,
can we all go home?

For goodness' sake!

Where is the tallest
lighthouse in Britain?

It's in the, er...

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!
No, trust me, even if he's lying...

...this is the kind of
nonsense he would know. Oh.

It's in the Inner Hebrides.

I mean, it's in the sea.
Can I just check?

Have we got any sailors in?

It's funny, I often ask that.

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

Why were you in the Inner
Hebrides to start?

Because I went to Scotland
to make a TV programme.

Which programme?
It was a day off.

Which programme?
It was, er...

...Who Do You Think You Are?

Oh, where they trace your
ancestry. Yeah, never came ba...

And you thought you were a
lighthouse?

Yes. It was early on in the format.

You just went around things to see
if you think you're that.

It was a great episode, me walking
up to various large objects...

...like a... Like a sort of, you
know, a bewildered penguin chick,

seeing if I could identify with it.

"Do you think you're this?"

And briefly I thought this
lighthouse was my mother.

Then they bring in the psychologist.
They explain, "No...

"you're, strictly speaking,
some sort of human being."

And then I cried.

End of episode.

So, this was a day off. It was.
This was for your own pleasure?

Yes. And did you have to
arrange this in advance?

Well, yes, you have to go on
a boat trip to get to it.

So, you arrive on the rock.
What happens then?

I get out of the boat...
And that's when you meet Emma.

And she is...? Well, she's,
as it were, the curator.

And how did she let you blow
her horn?

So, we go up to the top.

Wonderful view. Erm...

...the sea, mainly,
but you know, it's still nice.

And she asks if I'd like to, erm...

...press the horn.

And it's... It's not normal that

people were allowed to
press the horn.

And you think that's wise?

When you pressed it, did
all the boats in the distance

turned around and went the other
way? Well, yeah, I mean...

...a couple of tankers made
for the Faroe Islands.

But, you know...

If you had to
reproduce that sound now,

what sort of sound would you make?

Well, you know, a foghorn?

I'm hoping you're going
to illustrate. It was sort of...

Oaaaoh!

Wow! If you're on a boat ages away,
you're not going to hear that.

No. What you did was like a
1920s car in The Great Gatsby.

I'm sorry, this is a lot of
negativity about my attempt...

I did not suggest that I attempt
to make the noise of a foghorn.

Rob rather insisted, and I had a go.

And I'm sorry if you didn't like.

I just think it's rather insulting.

She's come all the way, potentially
from the Inner Hebrides, and that's

the impression you give
her of her own foghorn.

Maaaa!

That's a foghorn.
So...

Maaaa!

That's a foghorn.
You think that's better?

Yeah. Much better.

If anybody in that team is going
to pull off a good foghorn...

...it's Morgana.

Ma-huh!

All right, we need an answer.

So, is Emma Ugo's misled
mate, Sarah's puppet pal,

or David's horn honker?

I think it's Sarah because
I think, everything to me

suggests that Emma works in the
wardrobe department of a major

international broadcasting
corporation.

Yeah. So, you think...
I'm going to go with Sarah, too.

Because Tom has got a point.

She does look like a person
that would work in wardrobe.

But the problem is, she very much
looks like somebody that would do

a guided tour of a lighthouse.

Yeah. And, if she doesn't mind me
saying,

quite matron-y.

If I was Emma, I'd come
over there right now and smash

you in the face.

Right, time to decide.

we'll go with Sarah, then.
I'll go with my team.

I've got a sneaking suspicion
about Ugo's little cheeky face.

All right. I really have.
But you're saying that it's Sarah,

it's building a new Gordon.

OK.

Emma, would you please
reveal your true identity?

I'm Emma and...

...Ugo came to see me, te...

No!
Agh!

APPLAUSE

Yes, Emma is Ugo's misled mate.

Thank you very much, Emma.

APPLAUSE
Thank you.

What a legend!

Which brings us to our
final round, Quickfire Lies.

And we start with...

It's Lee.

I once caused carnage
at a local dog show...

...when I stopped to watch it,

forgetting I was carrying
a bag of sausages.

David's team, what do you think?
So...

...where are these sausages from?
In my bag, I've just told you.

No, where did you get them?
From the butcher's.

So, you're on the way back
from the butcher's... Yeah.

...with a bag of sausages.
Correct.

Unlike the previous week,
when I was coming back

from the baker's with a
bag of bread. Yeah.

And the week before, when I was
coming back from the candlestick

maker's with a load of candles.

Oh, it's good, you go every week,
one trip to a single shop.

Yeah.
The candle week was a hungry one,

but at least you could see things.

Can you describe
the circumstances of that

spotting of a dog show
on your way home?

I'm walking past a small fete.

What ground is the fete on?

Earth.

LAUGHTER
Planet Earth.

It's a ground near me.
It's a green.

A green.
Talk to us about the chaos.

Well, when a
butterfly flaps its wings...

What sort of things did
they have on at the fete?

The usual - coconut shy...

...demonstrations of tractors...

...and a bouncy castle.

Was there a hot dog stand?

No, there was a hot dog stand,
with the emphasis on the hot!

Fine.

They wouldn't have been distracted

by your sausages
if there was already...

A hot dog stand.
Yes.

No, there was a hot dog stand.

Unfortunately, it did say closed.

All the dogs kept going for it.

You answered your own question.

The dogs at this dog show had

previously cleaned out
the hot dog stand.

There'd been an awful incident the
day before in the semifinals

that accidentally cooked...

...cooked a sausage dog, and...

So they didn't want to
go through that again. OK.

So, you walk past the
closed hot dog stand. Yeah.

You're swinging your little sack.
Yes.

I just heard dogs in the distance.
LEE BARKS

Yeah?
Some were closer...

LEE BARKS DEEPLY
And some were very distant.

LEE BARKS SOFTLY
And some were very small.

LEE MAKES FAINT BARKING SOUND

And that's when I saw the sign.

What was the sign?
Dog show.

Oh.

Well... Get to the point when they
take an interest in your sack.

Right.

So, then, I'm there,
I'm now over with the dogs.

You wouldn't believe it.
Sorry, sorry.

Is this the quick fire round?

LAUGHTER

So, the dogs are running
round in a circle.

One by one, they come over,
don't they?

Yes. "Oh, he's friendly."
"Oh, he likes you, Lee!"

He's like, "Get off! Get off!"
Like that.

And then, eventually, he's took
the bag and he's ripped it out

of me hand, like that...
No. ..and he's run.

Which dog is this,
that rips the bag?

The one that paints for Dulux.

Breed.
No, no, I just stroked 'em.

I run after him, right?

And by this point, they're all
pulling at the sausages.

You've got the little sausage
dogs thinking, "Don't eat me!"

Was there a Chihuahua there?
I don't know, I couldn't tell.

Bichon Frise?

It was quite cold, I had a jacket.

So, Ugo...

...it's an elaborate story
full of authentic detail.

Is it true?

It can't be true.

It is true, I was there!

Sarah, what are you thinking?

I think there might have been
an experience of a dog show once.

But this sausage malarkey,
I don't...

I think he swung a bag.

I think... Once.
Yeah.

What are you going to say, David?
It's a lie.

Lee, was it a lie or was it true?

APPLAUSE
Ah!

But thank you.

Yes, it was a lie. Lee didn't cause
carnage at a dog show.

BUZZER

Well, that noise signals time is up.
It's the end of the show

and I can reveal that Lee's
team have two points

and David's team have three.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Thanks for watching.
We'll see you next time.

Goodnight.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING