02x13 - Staten Island Smackdown

[bunniefuu]

[Angelina] I think Vinny is totally in love with me

because I remind him of his mommy.

[Paula] Vin! I don't know why

you don't pick up the phone, honey.

Shut the [bleep] up.

I'll throw a broccoli at you.

[Jenni] It's weird, it's like

six yearshaven'tgone by.

Like, nothing's changed.

Now I'm gonna fight.

Whoo! [laughing]

♪ Here I come ♪

Yeah, buddy!

Party's here!

The Situation is under construction.

This might not have been the best idea.

We're so classy now.

On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

♪ Here I come ♪♪

♪♪ [squealing]

♪♪

[Nicole] Now I'm gonna fight.

Whoo!

[Ronnie] Uh-huh, yeah.

[laughing] [bleep], stop.

Nicole!

At this point, no one is safe.

[giggling] What the [bleep] is going on?

She's throwing broccoli at me.

Like, stems of garlicky broccoli.

Nicole! Stop!

Luckily, the broccoli was sautéed in butter

and it's keto.

So it could be absorbed by my body pretty well.

Whoo! [Angelina] Oh, [bleep]!

[Vinny] Nicole...

Check, please.

[Jenni] Listen, I'm the first one to say

that we should not be at these fancy places.

Just throwing it out there.

It was amazing, thank you.

I-- I hope we're allowed back.

Thank you. Whoo!

Ron, you're the worst!

Oh, my God.

Hey! [Angelina] Oh, please.

[Nicole] Let's go over to Headliners!

[Angelina] We're on our way right now.

I mean this-- we've been coming here

since the first house, if you think about it.

I'm excited right now, you know.

We're back in our element. We're gonna go to Headliners.

I feel like I'm back home, honestly.

It just sucks that Deena and Pauly aren't with us.

I just need to know how Nicole

is gonna survive five minutes in this place.

Okay, so the last time we--

You [bleep], you just hit-- ow!

My God, that's my boob, b*tch.

Ow! It hurts!

[laughing]

Oh, my God! Nicole!

Stop fighting!

I'm supposed to be on vacation right now.

This is my first night out, and I feel like I'm yelling

at Grayson and Milani for fighting

and, like, wrestling in the [bleep]damn car.

Oh my God, I'm separating your car seats, dicks.

We are not going to the club if this is how you're gonna act.

You're squeezing my arm, b*tch! 'Cause I'll k*ll you!

[Jenni] Can I get out?

Can I go in that one? [Nicole] No!

[cell phone ringing]

Oh my God!

[Vinny] Jenni? Oh, my God.

[laughing]

[men] Oh, my God!

They are fighting. They're fighting, they're fighting!

It's happening!

What's going on right now? Can you explain that?

I'm gonna k*ll you! [squealing]

I would not allow this. I would not allow this.

Do you allow this? 'Cause I would not allow this.

It's not allowable.

[Ronnie] Bite her! Bite her!

[Mike] Jenni, better view. Better view, better view.

[girls laughing]

[laughing] Oh, my God!

That's why people have rematches.

Bye now.[both] Bye!

[Nicole] It's happening?! Ahh!

♪♪

[Nicole] Oh, we're here.

Oh, it's happening. [Jenni] Let's go.

Where? Oh, my God, stop!

[Vinny] When we first went to Headliners,

we were just young, fresh-faced "Jersey Shore" little guidos.

[cheers and applause]

[Vinny] There's still something magical about this place.

It's like putting an animal in its natural habitat.

[crowd cheering]

♪♪

Whoo! Whoo!

Right now, Nicole is going in, you know?

That-- that vodka seltzer's starting to kick in

and she's just feeling herself.

She got her music, and she's just enjoying herself right now.

♪♪

She's screaming, yelling.

[screaming and yelling]

♪♪

[Ronnie] She's slapping me.

What the hell, [bleep]?

Yeah, it's great. It's better her to hit people than me.

♪♪

When Angelina comes here,

it's always a traveling [bleep] circus.

♪♪

I am just like, I have no part of this.

Angelina's engaged, and she's always saying,

"I don't do anything to you."

Well, here you are on my [bleep].

Like, I'm trying to be cordial,

get her away from me without setting her off.

♪♪

We have to pay this bill and get out

before Angelina ends up eating Vinny alive.

Angelina can stay. Goodbye.

♪♪

She was, like, bouncing on my [bleep].

She, like, sat on my lap, and I'm just like...

And then she's like, going like...

What girl with a man does that?

[Ronnie] Not a man. Fiancé.

He don't care, he's a cucker. I told you. I told you.

Her and Chris are out in these streets.

Cucking. [laughing] Cucking.

Myself, I can spot a cucker a mile away.

My girl checked my search history from my porn one time.

She's like, "What's a cuckold?" I was like...

♪♪

That ride was so long, Nicole's sober.

Yeah, that was so fun. Same.

[Angelina] Ah! [metal clattering]

Oh my God!

[Jenni] Oh my God. Angelina. You're on your own, babe.

Hold on! [Vinny] Here.

Wait, I got it. We're good.

I was sleeping, [bleep].

[bleep] everybody. Pfft.

Here you go. Thank you.

We're back.

Angeliner. [Angelina] What?

[Nicole] What are you doing?

Go to bed, wh*re, it's like...

Is that your heels?

Huh? [Nicole] Are you Cinderella?

[blowing raspberry] You go to sleep.

Kiss my a*s.

Tonight, I saw... [burps]

Sorry about that.

[sighs]

[bleep] all yous, [bleep].

Good night.

[Jenni] I'm gonna turn down the lights for you, Vinny.

We're gonna make it so cute for you. Yeah!

I'm gonna light candles.

Bow-chicka-bow-bow.

[Nicole] But we wanna watch.

[Jenni] Come on, Angelina, get in the mood.

Huh?

[Jenni and Nicole] Bow-chicka-bow-now-bow.

Vinny, go over there, she's cold.

Come on, Vinny. She's coming in hot.

She's cold.

[Jenni] I would love for Vinny to hate-[bleep] Angelina again.

Love it! And I feel like it's a perfect time.

So, let's go, girl, whatever it takes.

Angeliner.

Just lay next to her and rub her leg.

Nah, I'm good. Go on her bed.

No, I'm going to sleep. Oh, God, Vinny.

[Nicole] Angelina, she-- he's leaving.

Angeliner, he's leaving.

Vin, come back! Angelina, come here.

What?

Go in his room! Go, go.

Oh, God help me.

I'm not chasing that [bleep]ing wannabe, [bleep] that.

Nicole is instigating a little bit.

Stirring the pot.

I'm sitting there laughing my a*s off.

Angeliner.

[whining] What?

Come here.

Just [bleep] him. Leave me alone.

Vin! She said you have herpes.

What did I do to deserve this [bleep]?

I'm a nice boy.

Vin, come here!

Come in here!

[Jenni] Oh, she's going for it. [Nicole] Oh, she's going.

[Nicole] Angelina, give him a kiss.

If you wanna come at me, come at me in here.

[laughter] Fake-- fake-a*s son of a [bleep].

Go in his room!

[Angelina] The roommates are, like,

definitely are not, like, letting this go.

So like, I'm giving, like, in to the peer pressure.

Vinny just annoys me.

He's like a little mama's boy, a little b*tch.

[bleep]ing as*h*le! [Nicole] Get him!

Oh, she's going.

I'm gonna [bleep] that kid up.

You're going to Vinny? Ooh!

[laughing] [Jenni] Angelina took the bait.

And I'm like, yes!

'Cause it's about to get real interesting.

[laughing] I love this.

What's happening?

This is so funny right now because I feel like

this is Vinny's worst nightmare...

Do not let her in my room.

...but it's Angelina's, like, wet dream.

[bleep] you, you weirdo.

Get outta here. Get the [bleep] outta here.

I'm not trying to watch, but I'ma watch.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Ow!

I'm about to snap on Angelina.

Like, get off my [bleep]ing bed.

Like, I'm not even playing this game.

Leave me alone.

Where you at, bro?

I bet your [bleep] isn't even that big.

[hysterical laughing]

This is what I've been waiting for.

[Nicole]Yes!

[Angelina] Fight me, b*tch.

I ain't getting in your bed.

[Nicole and Jenni cheering] Fight me, b*tch!

[Nicole] I'm simply trying to give a helping hand.

You know, start that process of a hate-[bleep].

And just get it out.

Your [bleep] is not even that big!

[screaming]

Oh yeah, DJ Pauly D's in the building!

[all cheering]

Don't be a jerkoff. Stop talking to me!

[Ronnie] I've never seen Vinny get mad,

and he's [bleep]ing pissed right now.

Shut up! Shut up! You shut the [bleep] up.

Stop talking about me!

[bleep] you!

♪♪

♪ Now, look, I don't really mean to hurt nobody... ♪

I'm not trying to watch, but I'ma watch.

Where you at, bro?

Fight me, b*tch. I don't wanna get in your bed.

[Nicole and Jenni cheering]

♪ Mixed with a little animosity... ♪

[Angelina] Your [bleep] is not even that big.

[Nicole screams] I don't even see a bulge.

[screams]

Ooh! Oh, [bleep].

[laughter] What's happening?

What the [bleep]?

[screams] You cheated! You cheated!

[laughter]

Been there, done that!

Let's [bleep]ing go!

Let's do it!

[laughter]

What are you, Mike?

What are you, in freakin' Italy!

You wanna throw my [bleep]?!

You wanna [bleep] do this? [bleep]!

[Sammi] Stop it! [overlapping shouts]

Why?

Are we gonna watch sexuals? Yeah. Yes!

[Vinny] I'm trying to be cool to Angelina,

but she's just annoying.

I don't know what to say about this girl.

I'm done. I just-- I'm done, actually.

[Jenni] More tequila?

Shut up. Shut up, Vinny.

You think you're [bleep]ing cool, you're not cool.

Because if Pauly wasn't here,

you wouldn't bang anyone, don't [bleep] around.

[Ronnie] Oh, [bleep]. [Angelina] When we were in AC,

Pauly left you, and you're like, "I can't bang anyone."

Don't [bleep] with me, 'cause I'm Staten Island

just like you are.

Keep going, bro.

[Nicole] Angelina's, like, bringing up Pauly and Vinny's relationship.

So I'm like, eh, maybe you should ease up a little bit.

So, we kinda feel bad, me and Jenni,

because we kind of egged it on a little bit

'cause we thought it was funny, but...

Don't [bleep]ing go there with me.

[Nicole] ...I don't know. Maybe I [bleep]ed up.

[Angelina] If I wasn't engaged,

you'd [bleep]ing blow me up.

Whatever, Vinny. You know what?

I can't with this [bleep]ing kid, I can't!

He's so annoying.

I'm in bed, like this.

Angelina, she will not stop coming at me, no matter what.

She goes way too far. And now I'm pissed.

Now, he wants to bang me, like, and he likes Chris.

"I like Chris, I like Chris."

You don't like Chris,

'cause you'd bang me in two seconds.

I don't thinkyoulike Chris, bro. Yeah, I was...

[Angelina] I like Chris. I would never bang him if--

if I did not like Chris,

I'd be like, "yeah, fine", but I love Chris.

[Nicole] b*tch, what the [bleep]?

She's still obsessed with him.

Even if you would, don't say it, because you have a fiancé.

Be like, "No, I wouldn't do that, I think--

I think he's attractive, but I wouldn't do that."

That's what, like, a normal fiancée would say.

Not actually admit it and be like, "Yeah, I'd [bleep] him."

Like, no, girl.

[Angelina] I wouldn't bang him, but I would dump

in his face when he's sleeping.

Can you wake me up for that?

[laughter]

♪♪

[yawning]

Mm.

I know you get up early.

So, in an hour, I leave to do

that little speaking engagement for an hour.

The Situation used to do club appearances.

But now the Situation is the Inspiration.

Every single month at different rehabs,

I share my experience just to help the recovery community.

So, if you would like to come, you can come. If not...

Oh, I would love to. Okay, 'cause I know you get up early and...

I'll get dressed. Okay, you have an hour.

I-- I think I'm still drunk, but it's fine.

You still have an hour.

Oh, am I going to a rehab facility?

Um, you... Hungover?

I just went to bed three hours ago.

I'm just a little drunk.

I think there's a little irony there somehow.

The tequila is fully still in my system.

I'm going to rehab.

You wanna come? No.

[Jenni] Like, I could probably blow a . right now.

I'm like, are you trying to tell me something?

Just don't judge me.

Um... I wouldn't-- I wouldn't advertise it.

Where are we going?

I went to rehab at Discovery, and now I work with Discovery.

Once a month we give away up to five scholarships

to people that cannot afford

treatment center and/or rehab, obviously.

When I do this, not only is it

one of my biggest accomplishments,

but giving back, actually, you're helping yourself.

And I didn't even know that.

So, it's really so dope.

There was one time where I was,

you know, attempting to get sober.

I had a doctor and a nurse at my house.

They were detoxing me. And after-- to be honest,

I think four or five days, I was like...

I had the "[bleep] its" they call it,

where you're like, "[bleep] it." Yeah.

"I don't want this anymore, I wanna go party.

I wanna feel better." I jumped in the car,

and, um, Lauren jumped in her vehicle.

I was trying to get away from her.

So there was a bit of speeding going on,

a little bit of a car chase.

Eventually, a cop pulled up aside of me,

and I actually said to the cop

that there is a crazy fan following me.

And he just didn't entertain it.

He was like, "Mike you're crazy," he went like that.

But I actually said that to my girlfriend

who was behind me trying to help me.

And that's a-- that's a good story for people to hear that.

Yeah. Because that was my crazy times.

The low point. Yeah, I could not escape her, she...

[laughs] [bleep] it.

She was determined, and...

Turn around and went home? I turned around and went home,

and I went through the detox process.

I love Laurens more and more. She just stuck by his side.

She would not quit on Mike.

And honestly, that is so freaking wonderful.

Life stems from decisions.

So, how can you make a good decision intoxicated?

♪ Hey ♪

♪♪

So let's talk about Vinny right now,

because I don't get the kid, I really don't.

Oh my God, there's crumbs in my bed. What a mess.

[Vinny] Good, you deserve it.

It's all your guys' fault. Our fault?

You banged her [bleep]ing six years ago.

Vinny loves me.

I think everybody sees it. I see it.

I'm done with that girl. I hate that girl.

I hate her so much. I really do.

The faster he admits it to me,

the better it is gonna be for everybody in this house.

I'm done with that girl, seriously.

Aww.

She just went too far last night.

And I'm, like, done being nice to her.

I tried to be nice to her, and it didn't work.

She's a [bleep]ing psycho.

Vinny, just admit

that you're in love with me, that's it.

♪♪

Did you say sorry to Vin yet?

What?

I think you should apologize.

For what? Oh, my God!

Just be the bigger person and say, "I'm sorry

I got so drunk last night and attacked you." That's it.

What, he's mad?

Yeah, just do it. Just say you're sorry.

Oh, my God.

[Nicole] Last night, Angelina grabbed Vinny's p*nis.

And don't be, like, confrontational.

Just say sorry, and that's it.

And move on. All right.

She's gotta say sorry,

'cause that's what-- that's what we do.

Don't you have something to say to Vinny? Oh, my God.

We talked about it all day, just...

Vinny, are you mad at me?Mm-mm.

See, he's not even mad!

Just say you're sorry for being aggressive.

[Angelina] What did I do exactly?

What did I do to you?

I was drunk. Explain, please.

Nothing.

You repeatedly hit him with a pillow,

you attacked him, you grabbed his [bleep].

Oh, God. You jumped on top of him in bed.

Yeah. He looked scared for his life.

So just say you're sorry. Are you mad at me?

Okay. Oh my God.

So weird. [Ronnie] Oh, he's mad.

He's so mad. He's so mad.

He's, like, writing you off.

[Vinny] The girl is just, like,

she's not all there, you know what I'm saying?

So, I don't think her approach is genuine.

I don't give a [bleep] if you're drunk or whatever.

Don't come at me, you know what I'm saying?

I-- I just give up.

Let's have a shot!

When I lose Nicole, I feel like I lose my child.

[Ronnie] Uh-oh. Uh-oh, uh-oh.

[Nicole screams]

♪♪

Mike and Jenni should be back around :.

He's at rehab right now, or whatever? Yeah, he's doing

his motivational speeches or whatever.

[snickering]

[Vinny] What Mike is doing is obviously an amazing story.

He's definitely, like, the Inspiration now.

But now he's turning into one of those evangelicals

that you turn on, like, with a paid programming commercial.

It's like you have to be better, and not bitter, okay?

A smooth sea never made...

[both] ...a skilled sailor.

The energy you give is the energy you get.

How can I be a better brother? How can I be a better father?

Husband. How can I be a better sister?

How can I be a better mother?

[bleep], I'm not even a woman.

[laughing]

♪♪

Welcome home. Yeah, this is where it all began.

♪♪

Welcome. Hello again!

Nick. Hi, guys. Hi, sweetie.

Hi! Thank you guys so much for coming.

Thanks for having us back. Thank you.

[Jenni] I just hope that this goes smoothly

and people aren't like, "I think your friend

needs to, you know, come visit us."

I wanna take you to go see

our latest participant in The Giving Tree.

Moral support, I'm the drunk friend.

We look up to Mike so much, all these guys in here.

It's-- it's just been amazing seeing

his transformation, because he was once in here.

Yes.

I've walked through these doors many a times, okay?

And actually stayed in this rehab facility for days.

We've seen him at his lowest,

and we've seen him where he is today,

which is just phenomenal to watch.

I'm very proud of myself.

I didn't think that I'd ever get through it.

I never thought in a million years

that I would be the person that I am today.

All right, I wanna introduce you guys to Anthony.

All right. Anthony is our latest applicant.

Pleasure to meet you. Pleasure to meet you. Thank you so much, Michael.

God bless. Bless you.

Thank you, this is JWoww. Hi.

Very nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

[Mike] I'm giving away a scholarship

which is the Giving Tree program at Discovery Institute.

And it's helping others that cannot pay for treatment

get on the right track to a healthy, happy life.

When I heard I got the opportunity

to meet you... Mm.

It's kind of amazing, 'cause I watch your guys' show.

Ohh. Aww.

And watching your show, like, blew me away,

because I grew up in Seaside Heights.

Oh, my God.

I knew all the owners to the clubs.

Free drinks. Mm.

My ego was bigger than this building.

Same. Same. Same.

[Mike] Anthony's story is similar to mine.

He lived by the shore, he partied by the shore,

and those partying ways led to a dependency or an addiction.

Just knowing the fact that you were here,

you went through the facility,

and now you got your life back...

Yeah, knowing that there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Yeah, you know what I mean? Knowing that, you know,

you got over months and your life turned around.

This is what the program is all about. Right, Nick?

We're able to help. I am so grateful to,

you know, maybe be able to touch,

you know, at least one life.

Well, I could tell you right now,

you definitely touched mine.

Oh! Absolutely.

I'm trying not to cry. Me too, I'm in my feels right now.

God's hon-- I mean, God's-- you really did.

I wanna personally thank you for doing this.

[Jenni] I joke all the time, and the roommates too,

that we call Mike "The Inspiration."

But after this moment, heisthe inspiration.

God...

[men] ...grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change.

[Jenni] Anthony, I feel, is the mirror image of Mike.

That gives Anthony hope, as well.

Thank you, buddy. Oh, of course.

[Jenni] To see this guy thank Mike for saving his life...

literally, like, I'm dead inside,

and this, like-- this was making me very emotional.

And I'm so happy I was part of it.

I can't thank you enough, really.

This is gonna change my life.

Good luck. You got this. Thank you so much.

[Mike] Yes! All right, I appreciate it.

[Mike] I actually love to give back.

You know, I love to help others

that are suffering from the disease of addiction.

And I'm just very, very passionate about that.

Well, that was awesome. Yeah. [laughs]

Wow, that was fantastic.

[Jenni] High hopes for Anthony.

[Mike] Yeah.

♪♪

Vinny? Vinny doesn't wanna

speak to you anymore. Eff that.

Ohh...

Vinny, what do you have to say?

The man is pissed.

Vincent?

Are you [bleep]ing kidding me?

♪♪

[Ronnie] You ready for Jenks? [Angelina] Yeah!

[Ronnie] We got a shore house,

but it's not a shore house.

So the fact that we get to go to Jenks

by the beach, I'm looking forward to it.

You ready? Let's go.

[snorts] What the-- did you just snort, weirdo?

Yeah. Sicko.

[Mike] Started our Sunday Funday giving back.

[Jenni] Yes. Oh, so awesome.

Giving back and helping others,

I really take pride in that.

So it's time for me to indulge in burgers and fries.

All right, cheat day has begun.

I would like to do a number one

with cheese, diet Cokes, large fry.

A spicy chicken sandwich,

and also I would like to get some chicken nuggets.

I don't know if I can exactly pick one favorite

on the Burger King menu.

This is the definition of living your best life.

Have a great day. Thank you, you too. Thank you.

[Mike] I have to pull over right now because

it is time to live our best life.

And living your best life includes burgers and fries.

[Jenni] Yum!

[Nicole] Let's call Deener.

[Deena] Oh, hi. Deener!

Oh, hey, Deener! I miss you so much, Deener!

Are you gonna come over to dinner tonight?

To Sunday dinner tonight?

Yeah? Yay! Yay!

Deener for deener!

Pauly's coming, Deena might come tonight.

We're gonna have a nice dinner, and we're gonna be a family.

'Cause I feel like when one person's missing,

it's not the same.

I miss my meatball.

Vinny needs Pauly.

I've been here way too long without Pauly.

Bye! Bye.

I need him to get his a*s here asap.

Vinny, you love me.

She really thinks that you love her.

Vinny's shut off.

Hi, Vin.

She just went too far last night,

and I'm, like, done being nice to her.

You better be nice to Vinny today.

[laughing] How do you say his [bleep]ing...

How do you say his last name? Guadagnino.

Guadagnino. That's gonna be

your last name: Angeliner Guadagnino.

[Ronnie] That's good.

[Nicole] I just can't help it.

I'm an [bleep]. I think it's funny.

[Mike] Oh, there it is. [Jenni] There it is.

Let's do this. Wow, it is popping.

Oh, my God, I feel that

we're at home, we're back by the shore.

To be honest with you, coming back after rehab,

going straight to Jenks, it's so [bleep]ed up.

♪♪

Come on, Vin, have some fun.

Nicole, shut up. Come on, bro, enjoy yourself.

[laughing]

♪♪

Oh, let's go outside.

Yes! [Angelina] It's so nice out.

I love Jenks. Like, I go every single weekend.

But to go with the roommates for the first time ever,

pretty exciting. We made it.

Yeah, girl.

Yes.

[laughing]

[Nicole]Jenni!

[overlapping chatter]

You've been up-- you've been up for like one hour.

Jenni reminds me of old-school Jenks,

because we always used to come here back in the day.

Like, yes, I love it.

[Jenni] Hi, Vinny.

How's it feel that she grabbed your schlong?

You grabbed his p*nis.

Ashamed and regretful. Sorry about that.

It wasn't that-- not that type of party.

We were antagonizing a little bit.

Yeah.

A little--

[Vinny] Honestly, I think that

the Angelina and me sex jokes are getting old.

I get it, people are gonna have a little drama,

and I've always had this little tiff with Angelina.

But, uh, I'm over it.

I really don't wanna talk

to that psychopath the rest of the time here.

I'm so sorry. I really don't.

I feel like I contributed to that.

No, I mean, you guys-- I apologize.

You guys were instigating after the fact, which is okay.

I'm actually nice to her, and then she starts, um...

[bleep]. ...antagonizing me.

Yeah. Like, it's [bleep]ing crazy, you know?

It's like I feel like I'm living with a troll.

So are you gonna just straight up ignore her?

Like, today, did you ignore her?

Pretty much, yeah. I don't...

Like, enough. I don't wanna deal with her.

Like, how do you make it stop?

[Jenni] I feel really bad for Vinny right now.

He doesn't know how to react.

And it's a sad thing, it's so sad.

But I really feel like Vinny hates the [bleep] out of her.

She just, like, says crazy [bleep].

She doesn't realize she was wrong?

It's that she doesn't realize anything,

she doesn't remember anything.

You can't use that as an excuse, though.

I probably have never been pushed to this limit

with somebody because in my normal life,

if anyone ever is pushing me to this limit,

I just eliminate them from my life.

I can't eliminate Angelina.

If she pushes this too far, like,

I could be the reason why she's out of this house.

She's [bleep]ing annoying, honestly.

[bleep]ing home slice, yeah! [bleep] it!

Be nice, Mike, be nice.

Whoo!

Well, we need a code word. Let's come up with a code word.

Oh, like a-- oh, a safe word.

I need a safe word to know when, like, enough is enough.

Um, all right. Let's see.

And it has to be something that's, like,

we would never say in the house.

Yeah, yeah. Like some-- a smart word.

Yes.

Nuclear fusion.

Okay, if you say "nuclear fusion..."

Yeah, okay. I know.

If I had a [bleep], you'd be on it.

You were literally on my [bleep] last night.

[all groaning]

Sunday family dinner went to Sunday chaos.

Don't be a jerkoff, 'cause I will [bleep]ing come at you.

Come at me, bro. Come at me!

♪♪

Crab salad. Crab salad.

Burger. Yeah.

♪♪

And they're clocking in right now.

Yes!

What goes on tonight at Sunday dinner?

Oh, my God, right?

See, my thing with my friends is, when they're wasted

and I'm not on that level yet, I just wanna see you.

I don't want to be around you.

I just need to see you in my peripherals.

Like, oh, okay, you're good?

You're in eyesight, okay, you're fine.

♪ Everybody dance let the music play ♪

♪ Oh let the music play ♪

I'm having a good time.

I love drinking during the day, especially at Jenks.

And I'm just in a good mood right now.

I feel like I'm going to party my a*s off.

♪ Let the music play ♪

[Ronnie] Uh-oh. Uh-oh, uh-oh.

♪ Everybody dance ♪

[screaming]

I'm too lazy, I can't go.

♪♪

You wanna take a shot? Is that what you just said? [laughs]

I mean, I'm not gonna say no.

All right, let's go.

I literally just came from a rehab facility

to a place that needs rehab. Including me.

Four. Four? Who's the other two? Us?

Yeah.

[Jenni] The drinks are flowing,

that weird crazy laugh of Ron's is starting.

[laughing] You kept going... like...

It's gonna be that kind of night.

I don't think I can walk.

Because I'm drinking tequila now.

I can't even do it anymore.

All right, yeah. It burns.

I gotta piss.

When Angelina is in spiral mode, she's so fun.

She's literally my entertainment.

♪♪

When I lose Nicole, I feel like I lose my child.

[Mike] Where did Nicole go?

They've been dancing on stage.

Jenni. You wanna get home,

and clean up and shower, something like that?

I would love that.

Uh... I'll come with you guys.

[Vinny] I think we gotta get back home now.

It's Sunday dinner time. Deena's coming, and of course,

my husband Pauly's coming. So, we gotta get back.

[Jenni] Are you coming with us?

I'll let you guys go. I'm gonna watch them.

[Jenni] Oh, you're gonna go with the spiral squad?

I'm gonna be on babysitting duty, like always.

I love that Ron thinks he's gonna be the chaperone

and handle Angelina and Nicole.

That is like the blind leading the blind.

Like I've been for the last hours,

I'll continue to babysit.

Find my boo.

Find me on Care.com.

Are we ready? [Jenni] We're going.

Go check on your girl.

[Pauly D] Right now, being on tour, I have some serious FOMO.

I'm missing out on what my roommates

are up to at the house. I think my man Vinny misses me,

and I think Nicole's probably spiraling with Ronnie.

♪♪

[Nicole] Spiral Squad is k*lling it.

Papa Ron taking care of everyone.

♪♪

We always use to come here back in the day.

And I always used to play with the band.

And I'm still playing with the band.

But now I'm, like, more mature about things.

So that's where I got my bruise.

Check, please. Spiral Squad out.

♪♪

♪ Alert alert ♪

I'm, like, the only one that can control Nicole.

♪ I had a vision of the prison ♪

♪ Drunk men with pints of gin on the tin ♪

♪ Causing car collisions ♪ ♪ Alert alert ♪

♪ There's something wrong with this picture ♪

♪ Alert alert ♪ ♪ Y'all need Jesus ♪

♪ Alert alert ♪

♪ How did they get in here? ♪

♪ Alert alert ♪ ♪ Those wack emcees ♪

[Ronnie sighing]

Ooh, is that a spider?

[Ronnie] No, it's just a GoPro.

[laughing]

Wake that b*tch up. Whoa! [snorts]

[Ronnie]Hah!

Hey, bush. Meet Nicole. Nicole, meet the bush.

[Nicole screaming]Uh-oh.

Wait-- wake her up, Ron!

[Ronnie] Listen, I can't babysit no more.

It's just too much. Too much. Too much.

"[bleep] you, Ron. I love you."

Ow! That hurts.

Hello. Hey!

[Jenni] Spiral Squad!

Someone's gotta go wake up Angelina,

she fell asleep in the back of the cab.

[Mike] Oh, wow.

Ron!

Are you okay?

[Nicole]Babe!

Meh!

I'm stuck here.

Why are you in a bush?

I don't know. It's Steinberg.

[Jenni] It's adorable that Ronnie thought

he could handle these two girls by himself.

Angelina and Nicole drunk are a full-time job.

Babysitting that is like babysitting kids.

Can you get her out of the cab?

God. She's dead.

[Angelina] Who's that?

Let's go, a*s[bleep]. Wake up!

[Nicole] [bleep]! Whoa.

Mom in full effect.

I feel like you're my mom right now, and I love it.

But you're-- but-- 'cause you have kids, and I respect that.

Excuse me. Thank you. Uhh! Thank you!

I love her. Thank you.

[Jenni] Pauly needs to get here, stat.

[Nicole] Mike, what are you making?

We have eggplant lasagna. We're making chicken cutlets.

[Nicole] Oh, my God.

Garlic breads.

Vinny, what do you have to say about all this?

Hmm.

Angelina is just this, like, black cloud

that's, like, following me around.

Vinny?

Where's the, um, like, the seasonings?

Vinny doesn't wanna speak to you anymore.

Eff that! Oh.

Vinny?

Are you [bleep]ing kidding me?

[Vinny] Angelina is driving me crazy.

Pauly, I need him to get his a*s here.

Vincent?

Please! We're bro-mitted! Get here for me.

♪♪

Yeah, buddy! New Jersey, I'm home!

Yeah, buddy! I'm comin' for you!

I love New Jersey this time of year.

♪♪

♪What ♪

Where in the world are we? There's no water.

How's this Jersey Shore with no shore?

Vinny, what do you have to say about all this?

Vinny doesn't wanna speak to you anymore.

Eff that. Oh.

Vinny?

Are you [bleep]ing kidding me?

[Angelina] Wait, what?

That man is pissed.

Why? How do you know?

You touched his p*nis.

Angelina, now you see?

Do unto others what you want done to yourself, right?

Ron!

[laughing]

Yes, that is a cardinal--

that is, like, the cardinal rule.

[laughter]

Listen, we believe in an eye for an eye in this house.

[Mike] We sure do.

[Jenni] Angelina, you tend to, like, take the whole body.

[Angelina] I don't get it.

Most of us have done stupid [bleep] in their lives.

I gotta pee.

Vinny, you're being so dramatic. Chill out.

I can't.

[Pauly D] I don't know where the hell we are,

but this thing is dope.

I'm really excited to see my roommates.

I had some serious FOMO, I was missing out,

and I heard that Angelina is after my man Vinny.

She's gonna have to get over his a*s, 'cause he's mine.

Oh, yeah, DJ Pauly D's in the building! Yeah!

[all] Oh!

[laughs]Pauly!

I am so happy. Now the vacation has begun.

God, I've missed you guys. Tell me what's been going on.

Wait, let's show you the house first.

Give him the tour real quick.

And then we'll all sit down.

Oh, we got a little bathroom right here.

Damn, this place is nice.

I love him.

How is he so happy? So happy.

Nobody's that happy in life.

[Nicole] Thank God Pauly Positivity is here.

There's so much tension between Vinny and Angelina right now.

And Pauly can always turn a bad situation into a funny one.

What's that smell? Somebody's cooking something.

Made, uh, cutlets. We got Family Sunday Dinner ready.

Oh, dope.

I've been insanely busy. I've been DJ-ing

in a different state pretty much every single day.

I'm so excited to be back.

It feels good to actually eat food with family.

Well, I'd like to thank the Lord

for bringing us all together once again.

And to bring an abundance of blessings and favor our way.

Through Him, with Him, in Him.

[others joining in] In the unity of the Holy Spirit.

All glory and honor is Yours,

Almighty Father, forever and ever.

Let's eat.

Ding! [laughter]

Amen.

[laughter]

[Vinny] Glad we're back together. You've been blessed.

Things-- Things were not the same without you here.

Oh, yeah? It was very quiet.

Every-- yeah, it really was.

Ah, we're a family.

When one of us is missing, we can feel it.

Oh, where's Deener?

I thought she was coming for "deener."

Oh, Deener? I thought Deener was coming.

But I know-- She was supposed to come for "deener."

Oh, Deener for "deener." Deener was supposed to come for "deener."

[Pauly D] Deener for "deener."

Deena's pregnant. You know that?

She is.[Vinny] She still doing that?

You know that, yeah, she's still doing that.

I asked her. She's gonna go through with it.

[laughing]

She's keeping it. [Pauly D] She's gonna keep it, yeah.

She's not sure it's Chris's, but she's still gonna keep it.

Ah, dude, it is so dope seeing my man DJ Pauly D.

MVP is now complete. However, I wish Deeners was here.

[Pauly D] I missed the [bleep] out of you guys.

It's crazy how much FOMO I had. I'm on-- I'm on tour,

like, crushing millions of people, I missed you guys.

[Mike]Aw.

Angelina, I didn't miss you.

I cannot believe you just said that.

[Vinny] Missed a lot.

Thank you, that makes me--

Yo, Angelina has something to tell you.

Me?Yeah.

Specifically?Yeah...

Tell him. Are you guys kidding me?

Angelina grabbed Vinny's [bleep].

What? Facts.

I'm done. I'm going home. Pauly.

[Jenni]No! No, no, you just got here.

You grabbed his p*nis? Yes.

Because that's my p*nis, in a sense.

First of all, Vinny has to go sanitize

and take a hundred showers

before I ever touch that thing again.

And then what are you doing touching my man?

I'm not here for one day, she touched his [bleep].

What is the deal?

Well, he knows.

I know what? I know what?

You're obsessed with me.

[sputtering] Oh, my God!

What are you talking about?

[Angelina] I just love [bleep]ing with the kid.

You can dish it, but you can't take it?

Like, come on, Vin. You literally love me.

Just admit it to everybody here,

that you're obsessed with me.

You are a psycho. Oh, please.

The girl is delusional. Shut the [bleep] up.

[Angelina] You should just confess your love

in front of everybody. Yo, yo, honestly, drop it,

move on, that's it.

I'm not talking to her anymore, and that's it.

You want a woman like your mom.

That's who you want. That's why you love me so much.

'Cause I remind you of your mother.

Huh? [Mike]What?

[Pauly D] That's weird.It is.

[Vinny] How dare you. How dare you.

I don't care if Angelina

compared herself to Kim Kardashian.

I don't care if you compare yourself to [bleep]ing Beyoncé.

Do not ever compare yourself to my mother.

All I beg you to do is stop talking to me. That's it.

You [bleep]ing bring up my name every second.

I'm over here. I'm laughing at his jokes.

'Cause you're obsessed with me.

I'm obsessed with you? I don't talk about you.

You literally love me.

You can say it, that makes it true?

You wanna marry me. Make out, make out!

You literally wanna marry me.

Yes, I wanna marry you, you've solved the code.

Now can you please just never talk to me again?

We've solved the code. Don't be a jerkoff.

'Cause I will [bleep]ing come at you.

Don't be a jerk. Come at me, come at me. Come at me, bro.

You literally wanna marry me. That's what it is.

Yes, I wanna marry you, you've solved the code.

Now, can you please just never talk to me again?

[Angelina] We've solved the code.

Yes, now can you please just never talk to me again?

Don't be a jerkoff. 'Cause I will [bleep]ing come at you.

Don't be a jerkoff. Come at me! Come at me! Come at me, bro!

This is a nice house.

I don't know what the [bleep] his deal is with me.

I feel like Vinny's self-righteous attitude

definitely sets me off, and he's not fun,

and I don't even know why the [bleep] he's on this vacation,

to be honest with you.

You're so obsessed with yourself, it's sick.

No, you're obsessed with me, 'cause you keep talking about me.

You're actually obsessed with me, dude.

You should just confess your love in front of everybody.

Stop talking about me!

[bleep] you!

[Mike] This is crazy.

Sunday Family Dinner

went from Sunday Funday to Sunday Chaos.

Watch this, guys, you wanna see an experiment? I'm gonna walk over here.

I guarantee you she talks about me. No one gives a [bleep], dude.

I guarantee you, in the next-- No one gives a [bleep] about you.

--minute, okay, watch, :. No one cares.

No one cares. [Jenni] Stop.

Stop! Jenni, he goes at me, too.

Stop, just stop.

[Jenni] He truly does not want you to talk to him.

[Vinny] I am not talking to you

the rest of this whole time. Just don't talk to me.

No one gives a [bleep] about you, Vinny.

You're on my [bleep]. If I had a [bleep], you'd be on it right now.

Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait. You were literally on my [bleep] last night.

Oh, it was a joke.

[all groaning]

[Vinny] Stop talking to me. Don't even.

Stop talking to me. Stop talking to me.

Stop talking to me. You're gonna try to go--

[Pauly D] I've been here for one [bleep]ing day.

Don't even with me. Stop talking to me.

Stop talking to me. 'Cause you know--

Stop talking to me. --bad, bad, bad.

[Jenni] Angelina, stop.

Stop talking to me!

[Ronnie] I've never seen Vinny get mad,

and he's [bleep]ing pissed right now.

Don't even go there with me.

I have not spoken to you the entire day. I don't give a [bleep].

I haven't looked you in the eye. I don't care.

And you just keep saying "Vinny"-- Shut the [bleep] up--

You shut the [bleep] up. Shut up! Shut up!

Stop talking to me! Oh, my God.

[Vinny] I can't take it.

If Angelina's gonna be a part of this,

I don't think I'm gonna survive.

Let it go.

No, he doesn't let it go. I haven't spoken to you,

you keep bringing my name into this.

Oh, please, get over yourself. Get over yourself!

I'll be honest with you, I think it's time for desserts.

[laughter] Come on!