07x23 - Sue Joey

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ MTV ♪

- Yeah, we in town for the big game!

all: Vegas!

- You posted a shitty a*s story.

It's not cool.

- You saying I'm a shitty friend doesn't make

me a shitty friend.

- It's not funny.

- You inspired me.

- OK.

[soft music]

- I think it's time for me to, like,

figure out where I come from.

This could change my life forever.

Bye-bye, spit.

- Hi, guys. - Hi.

- Welcome to my home.

- This house isn't giving Pauly vibes.

- Pauly, where's the ice?

- My ice machine is broken.

- You got to be sh1tting me.

- Prank w*r champion strikes again.

There's some confusion.

You guys are out here for my big game.

I have a flag football game.

- Ha-ha.

You're so funny, Pauly.

Where's my ticket?

- Is Jenny crying?

Are you OK?

[upbeat music]

- Yeah, buddy!

- Party's here!

- The Situation is under construction.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

- Um, hello?

- I'm still the sweetest b*tch you'll ever meet.

♪ ♪

- ♪ I show up, I'm feeling fantastic ♪

♪ Feel the love, the landscaping drastic ♪

[singing in Spanish]

[upbeat music]

- That's a prank.

You're silly, just like this house is not yours.

- Yes, it is. And this is--

- This whole thing is a prank.

- And then we go to the--

[dramatic music]

- Well, yeah, if you guys want to go, it's all you.

[music slows]

- Wait, so we're here for your flag football game?

- Yeah. The big game is my big game.

I'm playing in a celebrity flag football game.

You guys are all invited.

- OK. - I even have cones.

- Oh, hell yeah.

- This is a celebrity flag football game.

TMAC and RGIII are

the two team names.

And that's the two team captains.

RGIII stands for Robert Griffin III.

Tracy McGrady is my captain.

He's a basketball player, a legend.

And this is for a great cause. It's for the veterans.

I'm always down to help the troops.

They've given so much to us.

This is the very least thing that I could do for them.

- Listen, we came out here for you.

- That's awesome.

At the end of the day,

we came here to visit Pauly,

and we're going to support him for his big game.

We're a family. It's what we do.

[upbeat music]

[cheering]

♪ ♪

- Jenni Farley.

[applause]

- And don't you worry, Deena.

You don't have to make anything because Nikki

made these for everybody.

- Oh, cute. Go, Pauly.

Go, Pauly.

At least there's a silver lining.

There's matching T-shirts.

We're still going to make the best of it.

- You guys should be cheerleaders, like corn hole.

- When I say corn, you say hole.

Corn!

Corn!

- Well, I need some help to practice.

You guys want to help me practice?

- Oh, hell yeah. Let's go.

- Fellas? - Let's go.

- All right.

- I'll help you throw your ball around.

- Have fun.

- I actually am excited to see you play.

- Me too.

- I mean, I would have loved to see Taylor, but--

- It's fine.

I'm ready.

It's going to be fine.

- It's a little sunny out here.

[dramatic music]

- Hike me the ball.

Get in front of me and bend over.

[laughing]

- Athletes can play any sport-- corn hole,

football, basketball.

- Yeah.

- We're just athletes.

- "Dancing with the Stars."

- "Dancing with the Stars." - Stripping.

- Stripping.

- Is that really a sport? - Yeah.

- Flag football. - You get in great shape.

- Yeah, but you have a uniform.

Yo, let's get down to important business.

- Dang, you see that?

- OK, what is the touchdown dance looking like?

- Ooh, that's a good question.

I'm going to take the ball.

Pah!

- You got to spike it, and then he's going to be like--

- I am not doing that.

- And we pose.

- Do the selfie, like--

[upbeat music]

- You can do the--

[laughing]

- I can spike it like a grenade.

- I feel like if I knew this was going to be, like,

a whole Pauly thing, I would have got,

like, a whole bunch of stuff.

- Yeah, I feel like we would have got a ton of decorations.

- There's still time if you want to maybe get something.

- Let's go fricking big.

We need to get, like, decorations.

We need to go all out and do an entire Pauly D section.

- Las Vegas Party to You.

How can I help you?

- Are you able to make an order within three hours, please?

- I absolutely can.

- OK, may I have seven megaphones,

popsicle sticks,

red fingers, football pads,

five football mascot costumes,

four by Italian flags, mini-Italian hand flags,

and all the blowouts that you have.

- Will that be all?

- That will be all.

- Yo, Vinny, man, you had that conversation with JWoww yet?

- Nah.

- Wait, you had a conversation with her.

- I did. - About that?

- Yeah. She's--

- I posted a "Jersey Shore" related meme.

I wasn't really thinking that deep into it,

but Jenni, you know, definitely stepped in

as Sammi's, like, mouthpiece.

- What is funny about that, just straight up?

What is funny to make that into a meme?

- And she was taking it to like really,

really high, deep levels.

And now, it's like a thing.

That kind of just went to a weird place.

- It definitely went to a weird place.

I was surprised it did.

- It was so unexpected. - Yeah.

- Yeah. - It'll be fun.

Like, I'm bummed about it-- - Different.

- But this is going to be fun.

- I was really excited to meet Travis and Jason's mom.

- Oh no, my f*cking son just got in trouble at school.

- What did he do?

- He got two write-ups with this one kid, and now,

he just got his third, and the teacher--

- With the same kid? - Same kid.

- Oh, no.

- I'm so disappointed.

I don't wish parenting on anyone that's not prepared

for everything, not only your mental health,

but your child's mental health, online bullying.

I mean, this is stuff I just never grew up with.

I'm dealing with sh*t my dad dealt

with in th grade with me.

He's in second grade.

Everyone grows up so fast.

When you left school back in the day, it was left at school.

Now, people can post statuses, or TikToks, or videos,

or stories about you.

My kids are learning things so much faster.

My daughter is learning makeup and hair

and cooking at such a tiny age, when I was, like,

, , , learning the same things.

- School is a hard place to be at their age.

- I can't even comprehend it.

- It was bad when I feel like we were going to school.

To have the internet and social media now--

- No, it's awful.

It's all the internet now.

- I think it's really hard for you guys.

You guys are doing an amazing job as parents,

but it's definitely has to be hard.

- It's not easy.

- Giovanna came home four times crying already this year.

- Milani didn't wear shorts for a whole year

because a boy called her a monkey.

I had to Nair her legs.

She was in second grade.

- That's f*cked up.

- I'm raising a nine-year-old, but it

literally feels like I'm raising, like, a -year-old.

- I'm always wondering, like if it's hard, because now

you're going to do these certain situations that you

would never possibly be in-- - I f*cking hate it.

- Like going to kids' parties, and you have to socialize

with other parents. - I f*cking hate it.

- Is it hard to do that?

- I would naturally hate it.

- And then I, like, worry like, what if these parents

don't want to come?

- Because of who you are?

- Because of, like-- like you know what I'm saying?

Like, what if they don't really know me outside of this?

I try my best to not feel judged by other parents

because of, like, my past on TV.

Let's have a good time.

- Oh, really?

Or, you know, me being on TV now.

Let's ride the f*cking bull!

♪ ♪

- [laughs]

- I definitely put myself out there

because I want everybody to see, like, yeah,

I am a normal mom.

You want to lay on Mommy for a little bit?

- [yells]

- How's he feeling?

- He was up all night.

It's OK.

Here I am, a drunken mess.

But at home, I'm a f*cking grade A mom.

- Everyone thinks they know us because of the show.

But we're totally different with our kids.

Everybody parents different.

Mom shaming is like a huge thing in general.

But the fact that I'm Snooki from "Jersey Shore,"

everyone always has their opinions on how I parent.

People judge you more.

It's exhausting.

I'm totally different here and then at home.

- Oh, yeah.

- It's hard probably for you guys.

I didn't know.

I don't have kids.

That really sucks to hear because I

still want to have kids.

But then think about me being judged by myself.

Now, if I have a child, they're going to go after my children

as well.

And the way I am, I will be in the slammer every other day.

- No, I mean, I can't imagine what it's like being Beyonce

or Kim Kardashian as a mom.

But at the end of the day, you have to be a mother.

Listen, I have no regrets doing this.

Every opportunity comes with their downfalls.

And as long as my kids aren't dragged through it,

I still consider it a blessing.

- It's very, very hard to be a parent.

And unless you see or you have-- like,

I get a little glimpse of it, and I go home

and I'm like, ooh.

- That's very well said because a lot of people don't realize,

you're in the background.

They are everything.

And you might picture your life to be incredibly

perfect when you have them.

It doesn't turn out that way.

And no matter how hard you try to make them be something,

they're their own little human.

- Hearing my friends telling me their stories

about their kids, that doesn't stop me, like the struggle.

It makes me want to have kids even more.

At this point, I'm like, guys, if you

only knew what I was going through

with this whole IVF thing.

I hope if I do have kids one day

that they aren't treated negatively because of who I am.

But it's a sad world.

But also I'm definitely prepared to have kids one day.

I love kids so much, and I love my nieces and nephews

like they're my own.

- And I, like, love to do things--

- And I love-- - --with them.

- I think it's worth it.

Like, when they leave, I'm like, I just had a great day.

Like, they're like my little friends.

- You're going to be a great mom.

- You know what's funny, when you want

to have a break from your kids, and you're like,

oh, I can't wait for them to leave.

And then they leave, and then you're like--

- I miss them. - I miss them.

- The house feels so lonely without them.

- So the moral of the story is you two,

don't have f*cking kids, OK?

- No, no.

- Have kids. - Have kids.

- f*ck that.

- Have kids.

- I'm adopted.

And everything that Angelina went through,

I was like, that's really cool.

- I would love to help you.

- What?

- The megaphone is making a squeaky noise every time

it goes by someone's vag*na.

[squeak]

You need to be f*cking accountable for what you said.

- What the f*ck is happening?

All I see is her burning this building down.

- f*cking mouth. - You should!

Sue Joey. Sue Joey.

- ♪ Tell me all the ways that you would ♪

♪ Take crime like you know that you could ♪

- TMAC's going to be the quarterback.

I'm getting ready for the celebrity flag football game

and I am playing wide receiver.

We are playing for charity, and it's for the veterans.

And it's a great cause.

- M. - V.

- P, touchdown! - Let's go.

- Yo.

- I wish you guys were playing on my team.

- Yeah, it's going to be fun.

- This boy is ready to go.

I gave him a little D, and now, he's ready to go.

- I'm going to be your biggest cheerleader.

We're going to be so freaking loud.

- Love you.

- Coach, I'll see you at the big game.

Make sure you scream for me.

- We had a blast last night.

- Meatballs in the building!

[screaming]

- And then we came home.

- We didn't do anything silly or stupid.

- I think we should honor Selena.

- I miss Selena.

[speaking Spanish]

I remember crying.

- Over Selena.

- She was m*rder*d.

No, she was m*rder*d.

[sobbing]

- You get drunk.

- No, I did at home, too.

- And you think you're Selena.

- Selena is my soul.

- Do you think Selena is, like, in here?

- Well, no, because I was born before she

died, so it's not like she reincarnated through me

- No, but maybe her spirit.

- But I could be related to her.

- Maybe her spirit.

- Because she's Spanish, from Corpus Christi.

- Wait, so you did your andMe.

both: Ow!

- I did a DNA test a couple of weeks ago.

So I wanted to do this with you because you inspired me.

As of right now, I just know I was adopted at six months.

They picked me up at the airport from Santiago, Chile.

And that's that.

I never, like, wanted to know about anything,

until Angelina did it.

Adopted kids, like, we always have this thing, where

we're like, where are we from?

What happened?

Why didn't my parents want me?

I was like, holy sh*t. This is really cool.

I'm years old.

I got kids. I got a full grown family.

Like, I need to know this information.

Oh, I'm .

Once you pass , you have no idea how old you are.

So Angelina gave me Pamela's number.

- Pamela is coming over today, the genealogist.

- Hi, Angela.

- Nice to meet you.

- And she gave Angelina, like, the binder.

- She has so much stuff.

- You have a whole book over there.

- Angelina's paternal family.

- Pictures and everything.

- Literally, the aunts, the grandma, the sister.

So why not reach out to her?

- Yeah.

I mean, she might be able to actually find someone here.

- f*ck it. Let's just do it.

Honestly, I have no idea what I could find with Pamela.

I mean, I could be, like, a baby from a cartel

or, like, related to Selena in some way,

or related to, like, a famous Spanish person.

I really don't know.

- Hello? - Pamela?

- Yes?

- Hi, this is Nicole, Angelina's friend.

- Hi, Nicole.

I do remember chatting with you

when I left Angelina's house,

and you told me a little bit about your background.

- I'm adopted, from Chile, Santiago, .

- What's going on?

- Everything that Angelina went through,

I was like, that's really cool.

I'm kind of interested.

Like, I was always curious, but I wasn't losing sleep over it.

But now, I'm kind of losing sleep over it.

- Really? OK.

- But it's not about my birth parents.

I think it's more about my siblings.

But I was wondering if you could, like, do

your research because you really

did a good job with Angelina.

Like, I would love to know if I have siblings.

My mom said it was an open adoption.

- OK.

I mean, I would love to help you.

I'm guessing that you don't want to ask your parents

for any documentation, right?

- I feel like in the past when I brought this up about being

adopted and wanting to find information,

my mom would get like, teary-eyed and,

like, emotional.

So I'm like, all right, she's not ready.

And then my dad would give a little more information,

but I could tell, like, he was a little upset.

But I feel like I never pushed, you know,

my questions because I didn't want to hurt them.

I always wanted a brother or sister.

Like, I would always tell my mom to, like, go to the store

and, like, buy another kid because I

always said she bought me.

- But thank God you got the "Jersey Shore" family, right?

- Exactly, yeah.

They're my brothers and sisters.

But that would be really cool to see, so.

- Whatever you need, so talk to your parents,

and then we'll go from there, OK?

- Yeah, that'd be great.

- She's always been very curious to see if she has

sisters or brothers, but she's been so nervous to take

the first foot forward.

- Thanks, Pamela.

- I'm really, really happy for her.

I love this for you.

- I'm doing this. I'm scared.

- I love this for you.

- I just called Pamela.

I'm finding my siblings.

- What? - I know.

I just did it.

- This is, like, years in the making.

- I always wanted to know my siblings.

- I know. You've always said that.

I'm like, oh.

- Pamela's actually going to find who's related to me.

- What? - I know.

Ew. Do I regret it?

- I don't think there's anything to regret.

- Yeah, all right. - Don't regret it.

- Yeah. - What?

I love that, aww.

Like, I'm emotional for Nicole right now because this is--

I can't imagine what it's like to be adopted.

I don't know how Helen's going to feel.

- I think she's going to be happy she's involved.

- Yes.

What?

There are so many questions that you

feel like you need answered.

And I love that Nicole has taken that initiative

to find those answers.

- Oh, God, OK, not ready for this yet.

- I always wished I was a twin.

Can you imagine?

- Oh my God.

- If there's a twin out there, just, like, roaming free.

- No.

Goodness gracious.

- ♪ Cupcake and a scramble ♪

♪ Ain't the one you can play or handle ♪

♪ You can tell ♪

♪ Leave it on the mantle. ♪

♪ Quick, cut it up like a sample ♪

- Oh, yeah, the--

- OK.

- Yeah come through, man.

Time for the big game, and I'm super excited.

- Thanks for coming. - Of course, man.

Thanks for having me. This is the big game.

And I can feel it.

It's huge.

- Yeah, I do.

- Yeah, it's legit, man. - How you doing?

- What's up, man? Nice to meet you.

- Henry. - What's up, man?

Nice to meet you.

[upbeat music]

How are your knees, man?

- They hurt, man. - Man.

Good to meet you. How you doing?

Big fan. - Thank you, man.

- You got some beasts on your team.

- You think?

- Yeah, you got some beasts, man.

- ♪ We gonna get it ♪

♪ We, we going hard ♪

[doorbell rings]

- ♪ Are you ready? ♪

- What the f*ck?

What do I look like, a moving company?

Come on.

This is way too heavy for me.

- What's in those?

- Oh my God.

- Do I look like Pauly?

- You look like Pauly.

- Cool.

- That is weird.

- It's your boy, DJ Pauly D here.

I'm playing in a big game today.

I got my blowout.

It took me minutes to do this blow out.

Yeah, buddy.

- These are all blowouts.

- The Italian flag, the megaphone.

- Let's go!

- We need to go all out because, clearly, we

thought it was going to be another big game.

And Pauly saw all of our faces dropped, so we have to go big.

- You look ridiculous.

- Shut the f*ck up, you f*cking...

- What the hell?

It's like troll vibes.

- Yeah, buddy.

Come on, guys. Cabs are here.

- [chanting] Pauly, Pauly.

- We're going to the big game!

- Yeah, buddy.

- [chanting] Pauly, Pauly.

- Wait, guys.

- Mike, grab that.

- Oh my God.

- Come on, Deeners.

- Look at me, man.

- I have Nikki with me.

She's going to be my number one cheerleader

because she's my biggest fan.

I didn't stretch yet, but we get it.

- My jacket.

Can somebody pick my jacket up?

- ♪ Bang, bang on the speaker ♪

♪ Overnight, a believer ♪

♪ For I believed ♪

- My jacket.

- Wait, wait, wait, do I have my phone?

♪ ♪

- ♪ Put me in the ring ♪

♪ Put me in the ring ♪

♪ Put me in the ring ♪

♪ I'm ready to fight ♪

♪ Call it victory ♪

♪ Put me in the ring ♪

♪ You know I'm the realest ♪

♪ Put me in the ring ♪

My man, are you ready? You stretching?

You stretching?

I know you're on another team and everything, but as long as

an Italian wins, I'm good.

- I feel good, the same way, man.

- Yeah, I'm liking the shorts, though.

- Hey, I'm trying to represent our people.

♪ ♪

- I called Pamela today.

- Oh.

- Can we all come?

- Tell them about it Tell them about it.

- No, stop. I've been crying about it.

That's why I was late getting ready.

- I love that.

- Really?

- So I called Pamela, and I was like, can you help me?

Like, I want to see if I have siblings, which was great

because then I called my parents,

and my parents said that I have two brothers.

So they were like-- - No.

- Wait, what? - Yeah.

So they were finally honest with me

because they knew I'm going to find out anyway.

- See? Thank God.

- So I have two brothers. - What?

- I do have two brothers. I mean, I might have more.

I don't know.

The fact that I'm learning all this information, I'm like,

holy sh*t.

It was like, kind of overload.

I was crying in my bathroom for, like, an hour.

- You see how it's, like, very emotional?

Like, it's very emotional.

- Nicole needs all of our support right now, like,

through and through, to get through this because this

is big for Nicole.

- My birth dad knew that my birth mom was pregnant.

He wanted nothing to do with it.

And she couldn't afford me.

So they signed papers.

And then I was in a foster home until I was six months.

And then my parents found me and brought me home.

So when I heard that, I was like, ooh.

- It's emotional, man.

- That's very emotional.

- I mean, there's so many questions.

Even though I'm getting all this information,

it just makes all the questions that much more bigger.

I'll let you guys know how it goes.

When I get back, I said I'm going to meet with Pamela.

- I love that.

- Wow, look at us.

- Look at us. - Look at us.

- Look at us. - Look at us.

- Sam, say it. - Who would have thought?

- Who would have thought? - Not me.

- Not me. - Not me.

- Not me.

- ♪ I've got the blessings ♪

♪ I got the best things ♪

- Nice to meet you guys.

- ♪ I got you guessing, what is the question? ♪

- What's it like being at the Dollar Loan Center?

- It's pretty dope. This place is amazing.

- How does it feel to be participating in the Celebrity

Sweat Flag Football Game?

- This is really dope.

- Did you hit GTL?

- Which sport/position would each member

of the "Jersey Shore" cast play?

- Mike would be a linebacker.

He's a big boy.

Vinny would be wide receiver.

So these celebrity games, a lot of times,

you have to do press beforehand.

And I love doing that because then I get to tell them exactly

what this game is all about.

That was fun. I love doing that.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- Do you want to meet them, your two brothers?

- I don't know.

- It's a lot.

- I know.

When you guys went there, it was like we're going right now.

It's just a lot for both of you.

- And, like, at least your parents

are being honest with you.

- Yeah, I'm excited for Nicole because I feel like--

- I'm happy your parents were honest with you.

- --this has always been like--

- Shut up. - What?

What?

- Let Nicole have her moment.

- No, I am.

- I hear you under your breath.

Stop it. - I have to say that.

- I get it, but come on.

- But it is sad. That's sad.

- It is.

But, like, can she have, like, her moment?

I'm annoyed hearing Angelina right

now because I know Nicole's been very

apprehensive of doing this.

We get that, like, everything is turning to sh*t about you

finding your bio dad.

And I understand that.

But like, why do you have to say it under your breath

when Nicole is trying to finally talk about her

finding her bio family?

Let her have, like, a second.

- I'm so happy for her.

That's something I wish I had.

I'm so happy for her.

Everybody likes supporting Nicole.

But like, God forbid we talk about when I'm going through.

When I was going through my sh*t,

Nicole kept talking about her meeting her family, too.

Did I f*cking jump down her throat?

No.

- I feel like I don't talk about being adopted a lot.

- You don't.

- But I feel like we should make this about Angelina.

I don't want to make it-- - Yeah.

- I'm so happy for her. - Me too.

- She's always going to have her moment.

I had mine. Now, she has hers.

- I'm so sorry.

Like, I want to console you, but like,

also, like I'm excited to tell you what I'm going through now.

- I would never want to take that away from Nicole.

- I'm going to puke.

- ♪ Say ooh, ahh, all the way live ♪

♪ On my way when I'm in my ride ♪

- Oh, God.

- Then the next morning, I woke up,

and my grandmother was brushing her hair with it.

- Oh, your poor grandmother.

- All right, here we are, guys.

- Everyone is pumped.

- Hell yeah.

- I want to decorate Pauly's section.

And I can't wait to see Pauly kick some Cooley out there.

[upbeat music]

- Wow. - It's huge.

- It's a real stadium. - Yeah.

- You look so cute.

I am so f*cking excited that Nikki is here.

Even though we do keep in touch a lot, just with like,

memes, and I love her cooking videos,

but I haven't seen her in forever.

- Oh, there he is.

Look at you in your little outfit.

- Pauly looks so hot in his uniform, cleats,

gloves, and the jersey.

Like, my man looks good.

- Angelina, there's your friend right there.

- Oh, sh*t. - Who is that?

- I think he's the "Bachelor" guy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Hi. How are you?

- Good to see you. How's it going?

- Good to see you. Good luck.

- Thank you. - Good luck.

I know Jason because he was on "The Bachelorette."

- Who that? - Jason Tartick.

His manager had reached out to me to go on his podcast,

and we just had a great conversation.

- You banged him too? - No, I didn't bang him.

- Oh, you didn't bang him yet.

- I haven't seen him since I did his podcast,

but I'm going to come clean.

Jason Tartick is in my DMs.

And he thinks I'm very pretty.

- Get a touchdown. - Yeah, I will.

- Scream for me real loud.

- He doesn't know what's in store for him.

- We're going to be embarrassing.

- Yeah.

- You guys want a Pauly D head?

Let's do it, guys.

Let's support our boy.

We're going to deck Pauly D's section out.

Pauly D wig, let's go.

Put the wig on, Nikki.

- We are really embodying the Pauly D spirit.

We got Pauly D chants going on here.

- [chanting] We want Pauly.

- We even got Nikki here.

Even though I'm the side piece and Nikki is the main piece,

right now, we're coexisting.

[chanting] Pauly, Pauly, Pauly, Pauly, Pauly,

Pauly, Pauly, Pauly, Pauly.

- Sin City, the host of this year's th Annual

Celebrity Flag Football

Challenge, a charity game to

benefit veterans, where

all the stars are out tonight.

- Let's go!

- Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Team TMAC.

[cheering]

DJ Pauly D.

[cheering]

- You got to be loud, loud, loud, loud.

- [chanting] Pauly, Pauly.

- They really stepped it up.

Usually, I'm the loud one, but today, they are the loud ones.

- [chanting] We want Pauly.

We want Pauly.

- Let the game begin.

And here we go, the first play incomplete to Shawn Marion.

- Let's go, Pauly.

- Go!

[megaphone squeaking]

- Gold medal at the top-- - What?

[squeak]

- Every time--

- The megaphone is making a squeaky noise every time

it goes by someone's vag*na.

It's very loud.

[squeak]

I don't know the logic behind it.

[squeak]

We're very fertile.

- Does yours?

- No.

I lost my--

[squeaking]

- But it's freaking weird.

- Can't put it by your vag*na.

[squeaking] - Why is it?

- Oh my God.

- Oh, it does.

[squeak]

- We did it to mine, but it wouldn't work on mine.

I don't get it.

It's like a black hole in there.

[squeak]

- Oh my God.

- It's a black hole.

- I have no idea, very weird.

- I don't get it.

[squeaking]

There's something weird.

- Wait.

[squeak]

- Oh, I have a p*ssy.

[squeak]

- Tracy McGrady surveys the field.

Incomplete off the hands of Roscoe Dash.

- Jason, you fumbled the ball.

- P-A-U-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi, you ugly.

The other team is ugly.

- f*ck!

- I can scream all I want.

f*ck!

- I feel some sexual tension there.

I'm feeling like there's a thing going on here.

- She's like this.

- Well, he said stop distracting me.

- You have a fiancé, you crazy thing.

You like Angelina.

- She's married.

- Right now, Vin and I, we're in a very,

like, weird, bad place.

I go back and forth with it.

So seeing Jason, a guy that's just very likable, very nice,

it makes me feel good.

Hey, Hey, Hey.

- Welcome back to Las Vegas at the Dollar Loan

Center, where team RGIII holds a to

advantage over team TMAC.

- So far, I don't have a catch, but it's only a matter of time.

[upbeat music]

- TMAC back to pass,

covering Pauly D, and it's caught.

What a catch by Pauly D.

And he makes a move past the defense

down to the yard line.

[cheering]

- He ran that out route, and that was a hard throw

by McGrady, but he was able to make the catch,

get some extra yardage.

- I am an athlete, super lit.

It feels amazing.

[cheering]

- I want to go grab some popcorn.

You want to come?

Be right back.

Mike got to go eat. - Stop him.

Stop him. Stop him.

- It's caught for the touchdown by Jason Tartick.

- There goes Jason.

c*ck.

[laughter]

- Thank you. - All right.

- Want anything else from here or no?

- Let me get the tendies and the pickles.

- I thought you said popcorn.

- I hear you, but I can't turn down the tendies,

and then there was fried pickles, and French fries,

and a diet soda.

I just couldn't help myself.

I got no more hands.

- I got-- I got one hand for you.

I got it. I got it.

- Oh, sh*t.

Hell, yeah, family. What's up, family?

- Hey, bro.

- How are you?

- f*ck. Let's go!

- [in singsong] Tartick likes Angelina.

- Angelina, I think you like him a little.

- I think you do like him a little.

- I think you like him.

- He's just a nice guy.

He's going through a breakup.

I love your a*s, Jason.

It looks so nice in those tight f*cking panties.

We're friends.

- She's engaged.

- Don't say that.

Jason, nice a*s!

[squeaking]

- It's halftime here at the Celebrity

Sweat Flag Football Challenge.

Standouts for the game so far are Jason Tartick and Willy

Gault for team RGIII, and for team TMAC,

the Budrewicz brothers and DJ Pauly D,

who's down on the field right now

with some of his fellow "Jersey Shore" stars.

- Check this out.

I need you guys to be real loud right now.

Can you repeat after me?

When I say yeah, you say, buddy.

Yeah.

- Buddy.

- Yeah. - Buddy.

- Fun day, or what are you doing?

- The podcast comes out Monday.

- Oh my God.

- Oh my God.

Look at Ange.

She's hugging him.

- Angelina.

- Let's go out.

I want to come out.

- She's engaged.

- No, no, no, Angelina.

- What?

He's nice.

- What is happening?

Like, Ange, aren't you engaged?

Aren't you still, like, trying to figure it out with .?

I didn't even know Jason existed until today.

Like, I can't even keep up.

- I'm going to go on the f*cking field, and I'm hyping

everybody up for Pauly.

That's my job right now.

- And now, it's time for a very special halftime show

by "Jersey Shore's" Angelina.

- What's she doing?

- Wait, what is happening?

- I don't know what's happening.

- ♪ My mojito walking in high heels ♪

- Yes!

- ♪ Every step a glance of at least ♪

- You f*ck. I can't.

- Ange reminds me of a streaker.

Any second now, the cops are going

to come over and tackle her.

- Shut up, Blake, you f*ck.

You're good, bro!

You're good.

[screams]

- ♪ Gather all the empty glasses ♪

- Jason, throw the ball to me.

- Wrong team, Ange, wrong team.

Wrong team.

- Angelina, take off the flag.

- She's so aggressive.

- She's aggressive.

She's definitely banging him.

- Who'd she run into?

There you are.

- They just said to get off the field.

- Flutie launches one downfield, and it's caught.

Touchdown, Jason Tartick.

- Ange, that's your man.

That's your man.

[booing]

- She's f*cking him. - Eat his a*s.

- She's f*cking him. - Eat his a*s!

- Oh, she's definitely f*cking him.

Oh, yeah.

- I'm telling ..

- That's your man.

- OK, all right.

- That's your man.

- I kind of am feeling like Taylor Swift right now,

and he's Travis Kelce, you know?

- They are hardcore flirting.

She's showing me the texts that he's

texting her on the sidelines.

She's like, go, Jason.

And I'm like, ugh.

- I am f*cking dying.

- That was actually really cute.

- It was cute if she was single.

- Jason is definitely flirting with me right now,

and I don't see a problem with that.

Vin and I, we-- we're like a roller coaster ride.

- Are you single?

- I'm like, back and forth.

- OK.

- She's like, what's today?

- Our relationship, it's neither here nor there.

It's just a day in the life of Angelina.

- You are still in an engagement.

- Me?

Me and f*cking Vin are back and forth, bro.

We're not always together.

- All right.

- She's, like, annoying me.

- Who?

- Touchdown, Henry Budwericz.

- Is he single?

- Now he is. He's not with Kaitlyn Bristowe anymore.

- Oh.

- Joey's really good friends

with Kaitlyn.

She talks a lot about him.

This guy, Jason, he used to date Joey's friend.

Joey is my g*y bestie.

- Mama's got a brand new pair of shoes.

- So I definitely trust his opinion.

I just don't want her to get hurt by this guy

because I know some things that Joey said.

She spills a lot of tea about him.

- I really don't care what Joey has to say.

- But he's so nice, though. I don't know why she does that.

I already know how this is gonna go because Ange

gets into these situations.

I go, just trying to let you know what I've heard

and then do what you want with it.

- But wait. What does she say?

- Not great things if they didn't make it.

- Yeah, but when people don't make it, it's not always bad.

- OK. - Let's go.

- Nicole is trying to f*cking start a problem with me.

When I get the f*cking attention, and it's not on her,

she doesn't like it.

Well, guess what?

The attention is always going to be on me, baby,

because I'm f*cking Angelina.

- Joey, to me, is a rat, so.

- Joey's not a rat.

He's exposing you for the person that you are.

And you're not a nice friend.

- I can actually sue him for that.

- So sue him, Angelina.

Sue him.

- I haven't seen Nicole get this upset in a very long time.

- Please sue Joey.

- Yo, we're not doing this right now.

- Sue Joey.

- ♪ I can see it in your eyes, it's the right time ♪

♪ You want to lose yourself, you want to go, wow ♪

♪ The rhythm is addicted to the bass line ♪

- Welcome back to the Celebrity

Sweat Flag Football Challenge.

- [chanting] Pauly, Pauly, Pauly.

[upbeat music]

[cheering]

- The action is heating up on the field and in the stands,

as we return to the drama between Team Snooki

and Team Angelina.

- Joey knows so much sh*t about him.

Not great.

But just because Joey knows her, doesn't mean sh*t.

- Joey's friends with the girl.

And they're very good friends.

- So good.

So then if he talks sh*t, then that's f*cked.

I don't know.

- He's not talking sh*t, Angelina.

- I'm just saying.

- I always wanted siblings because

I grew up as an only child.

So Joey is literally my big brother.

I would literally die for Joey.

Why the f*ck are you talking sh*t about him right now?

You have so much animosity towards Joey.

It's, like, weird.

- I mean, obviously, a little bit.

- Joey, he's a rat.

Joey came to my hotel room to do my makeup,

and then all of a sudden--

- Stop talking about me.

- --Sam's mad at me.

- It's Joey.

- Joey, to me, is a rat.

- Joey's not a rat.

He's just exposing you.

- So who the f*ck wants to-- who's a friend

that exposes somebody when that's not their business?

- He's exposing you for the person that you are.

You're not a nice person.

- I can actually sue him for that.

- So sue him, Angelina.

Sue him.

- I'm watching this fight like it's the game.

- Sue him.

Try and sue him. Do it.

[whistle blows]

- Interference on Team Snooki, yards.

- He's telling the truth about you.

- Team Snooki with the interception.

- What did I say?

- Team Angelina with a vicious crack back block.

- You just said you want to sue Joey.

- Oh, Team Snooki with a blitz and sack, Team Angelina.

- Nicole has reached, like, another level of anger that she

usually doesn't get to do.

- Sue Joey. - And a touchdown!

- Sue Joey.

- I didn't.

- As this chaos erupted, I'm like, dude,

I need to take me a photo right now.

- I'm not saying that.

You always want to sue people when you're uncomfortable.

Sue Joey.

- In my first photo, it seems that Angelina

is not necessarily processing what's happening right now.

OK, my next photo, Nicole's like this.

And then Angelina is like this.

And then Vinny is in the background laughing.

And Deena looks disgusted that we were five seconds prior

to this enjoying and supporting Team Pauly D.

This right here, when you go in like this, it's like, ugatz.

- Do it. Sue Joey.

- I could. - Sue Joey.

- Yo. - Sue Joey,

- We're not doing this right now.

- I haven't seen Nicole get this upset in a very long time.

- I don't f*cking--

- sh*t here before.

- I don't f*cking like you.

I don't f*cking like you.

I don't f*cking like you. - Nicole, wait.

- I f*cking hate you.

- I'm actually proud of her.

Like, you go, girl.

Like, you're standing up for your friend and yourself.

And I think that's amazing.

- Sue Joey.

You literally threw Joey under the-- you sue him.

- That doesn't mean I was really going to sue him.

He's not even worth suing.

What, am I going to get, a nickel out of him?

How do I want to sue anybody?

I've never sued anybody.

- You just said you want to sue Joey.

- I said I could have because of his f*cking mouth.

- Sue Joey. Sue Joey.

- This is ridiculous.

- Sue Joey.

No.

You need to be accountable for what you said.

[whimsical music]

- Nicole is about to take off the hoop

earrings in round number two.

- OK, hold my earrings.

- Bring it the f*ck on.

- Next thing you know, it's round two.

- Bring it on.

- Sue Joey, Angelina.

Sue Joey. Sue Joey.

Sue Joey.

- What the f*ck is happening?

All I see is her burning this building

down in the name of Joey.

- Sue Joey.

- ♪ Walk, walk, sparkling, doing what I do ♪

♪ Walk, talk, look, see, I'm making ♪

- Welcome back to Las Vegas for the th Annual Celebrity

Flag Football Challenge.

- [chanting] Pauly, Pauly, Pauly.

- It's DJ Pauly D, down to the -yard line.

Pauly D's having a hell of a game.

His roommate must be going crazy watching this.

- Sue Joey.

- You don't talk about Joey.

Joey is like her brother.

I'm not surprised that Nicole reacted that way.

- Joey is so sweet.

You don't deserve Joey.

Just sue Joey.

Please sue Joey.

- Sue Joey.

I could tell that this is going to be a hit.

Like, sometimes, like, we get these little bangers that

are just created, like GTL--

- GTL, baby, gym, tan, laundry.

- --and T-shirt Time.

- It's T-shirt Time.

- And now, Sue Joey.

Sue Joey!

- Shut up, assholes.

- Vinny, stop.

- #SueJoey.

- What a D-I-C-K.

- Little brother syndrome.

- I don't give a f*ck anymore.

It's very hard for me to calm down.

I don't do that ever.

- Is there something I can do to help you?

- I know exactly where to take Nicole to calm her a*s down.

It's a timeout room.

- That would be nice. - Want to go?

Come on.

Culture City is a charity that I am on the board on.

And when I first walked into this building,

I saw Culture City sensory room.

They have a Culture City sensory room.

- I love that.

- That is a calming room.

- I can't deal with her anymore.

- Sue Joey.

- Thank you.

[calm music]

♪ ♪

- Come in.

- This is great, Jenny.

- I know. This is a very small one,

but we're going to make do.

- I'm so grateful for Jenny to get me out

of that frickin' situation.

Yeah, right.

I feel relaxed.

I feel fine.

[rattling]

♪ ♪

This sensory room is like heaven right now.

- One play, three seconds left.

Flutie throws it down.

- Oh!

[dramatic music]

- Caught by Madison.

I don't believe it.

It's a touchdown.

Team RGIII wins it.

I don't believe it.

- They catch it.

Touchdown.

Pauly's team lost.

- It's all good.

- Good game!

- The game might be over, but the battle

between Snooki and Angelina has just begun.

- Sue Joey.

- I'm f*cking done with Angelina.

She sucks.

- This b*tch is talking hella sh*t about me.

What's going on?

- We're leaving.

- I'm not missing my flight.

- Angelina won't leave.

I want to go back to my real house.

- Ange, we're going to be late.

- We have six embryos.

- Babe, that's awesome.