03x04 - Snatch Game

[bunniefuu]

- Previously on "RuPaul's
Drag Race Down Under"...

I've made my decision.

[tense music]

Rita Menu!

[cheering]
- Yes, b*tch!

- Shantay, you stay.

For this week's maxi challenge,
you'll be starring

in "The Fake Housewives
Down Under."

- [laughs]
- Oh, yeah.

- [vocalizing]

- Rita Menu.
- Sorry.

- I was losing you.

- Just wasn't quite
enough for me.

- Ivanna Drink.

- You're doing this.

- Drag needs to have an element
of play all the time.

- Gabriella Labucci.

- Ooh, I bet you can.

- Congratulations,
you're the winner

of this week's challenge.

[dramatic music]

Rita Menu, shantay, you stay.

- [gasps]

- Ivanna Drink, sashay away.

[suspenseful music]

- [sighs]

Very shocked.

Yeah.

I had this hunger to win,

but I just didn't think
it was enough.

That was quite scary, actually.

Like, I couldn't figure out how
it was going to go in the end,

but I just stuck to my g*ns
and do what I do best.

- Looks like you're
the lip-sync assassin.

- Oh!
- Whoa!

- Watch out, girls.

- I deserve a spot here.

"I love you all so much.

"I'm gonna miss you and can't
wait to see how you all do.

"See you on the outside.

"And be happy
with what you put out there.

All my love, Ivanna."

- We love you, Ivanna.
- We love you, Ivanna.

- Oh, Werk Room's gonna be
a lot quieter with her gone.

- I don't know.
Flor's still here.

- Ah, true, yeah.
- [laughs]

- Ivanna has this ability
to light up a room

and make everybody laugh.

And unfortunately, the judges
didn't get to see what we saw.

- Couch is getting roomier
and roomier, honeys.

How are you feeling, Gabby?

You won.

- Congratulations, Gab.

- And you won $5,000.
- Right?

And I the only one who's
won a mini and a maxi?

- Yeah.
- Ooh!

- Well, we've only had one mini.

- So far, I'm in front.
I'm the lead.

I better f*cking keep this up...

- Ash, what's going on with you?

- What happened?

- Obviously, I was
in the bottom the first week,

and then safe,
and now safe again.

But it would be nicer to be
higher in the top, I think.

I'm sitting here kind of waiting

to go home at this point.

I feel like I haven't made my
mark or done anything notable.

I'm disappointed in myself
that I haven't done that yet.

Maybe next week,
I need to step up a bit.

I mean, I'm on a somewhat
upwards trend, I think.

- Mm.

- So who's gonna win next week?
- It's me!

- I've just had
a taste of victory.

And I'm here for more.
- Uh-huh.

- Exactly.
- Me three.

- It must be my turn though,
surely.

- I'm not too c*ck.

Girls, I'm the winner!
You'd better catch up.

Ooh-hoo!

I just hope that I can
keep this momentum up.

- I'm not chasing you, b*tch.

- [groans]

I want to do well here.

The biggest thing
that I did on "Drag Race"

wasn't just getting
on "Drag Race."

- Hello?
My win next week?

Thank you.

- I have to go
ba*ls to the wall.

There's no option at this point.

I need to get
the stick out of my a*s,

and I need to prove
that I deserve

to win the competition.

- Life's not fair.

- [laughs]

- The winner of
"RuPaul's Drag Race Down Under"

will receive a year supply
of cosmetics

from Anastasia Beverly Hills

and a cash prize of $50,000.

Tonight, with Michelle Visage,

Rhys Nicholson,

and our extra special
guest judge, Keiynan Lonsdale.

[singing]
"RuPaul's Drag Race"

May the best drag queen win

Best drag queen win

[upbeat music]

- Yeah!
- It's a new day.

- New day in the work room.

- I want to sit in the middle.
- Week four.

- All right.
- We have survived another one.

Last week wasn't perfect,
but that's OK.

I'm gonna keep
my positive attitude

to propel me into the future.

How we all feeling?

- I'm really happy with the team

that I had last week
because they're all still here.

- Yay!
- That's very true.

- Yeah.

- I really loved
working with my team.

What did everyone else think
about working with me?

Did you enjoy it?

- Well.
- [laughs]

- [sighs]

I think Bumpa thinks
that she is the one,

she is the boom-boom.

She didn't deserve
to be in the top.

- We have dissent in the group.
Ooh.

- Well.
[laughter]

- I mean, I was surprised
to see you in the top

because we had
a little glimpse of, like,

the first opening number
of everyone's,

so that's kind of when
I sized everyone up.

- You know, people say your
name, it's not a bad thing.

But I suppose
they're all coming for me

because they all want the prize
and they all can see, you know,

the flaws are starting to show.

- Rita, you've been
in the bottom two...

- Twice in a row.
- Twice in a row now.

- I have.

- Sorry, twice in one week
you had to lip-synch?

- Yeah.

- I'm quite positive in,
like, my mental state.

I guess I'm not putting
myself down based on how

bad I've been doing
at the moment.

I think I just have
to trust myself a little bit.

- Competition is getting
tougher and tougher.

- It is, it is.

- So to make it this far
is a real blessing.

- Yeah.
- Absolutely.

It is absolutely.

- But, you know, these girls
gotta go home so I can win it.

- Absolutely.
- Ooh!

- OK!

[door clicks]

[all exclaiming]
- Good day, good day, good day.

- Oh, oh!

- Hey!
- Hello.

Now, I have a question
for you lady marsupials.

How big do you
like your pouches?

Oh, pit crew!

- Ooh!

I like what I see.

[upbeat music]

- My jaw drops to the floor,

I mean, rightly so because I'm
going to need all the space

I can get to fit
all these boys in.

[exhales sharply]
- [laughs]

- Hoo!

- Are you gonna be
all right, !sis?

- I'll be just fine.

- Now, for today's
mini challenge,

we're playing
a colorful little game

called Pick a Pair of Pouches.

Beneath their short shorts,
these hot mens-es-es

are wearing colorful briefs.

And whichever queen
pairs up the pouches

in the least amount
of guesses wins.

- I'm not picky, you know?

I'll take all of them.

- Starting with !sis Avis Loren.

Pick a pair of pouches.

- Uh, number three, please.

- Oh, all right.
- Hoo.

I think I might be
a little d*ck-stracted.

Can I please have
number six next?

- Ooh.

- [gasps]
- Oh, oh, oh.

Yellow, gorgeous.

- Not a match,
but I'm not disappointed.

- Not a match.

Pink pouch.

- Two.

Oh, sh**t.

- What color's Rod wearing?

- There's a color there?

- There are too many pouches.

There's big pouches,
little pouches, medium pouches.

Nine.

All kinds of pouches.
Just pouches.

- Ooh.

Are you in a coma?

- [laughs]

- Number 10.

Who's got orange?

Ooh.
- [laughs]

- Numero eight.

Ah!

- Use your psychic powers.

- Number five.

- We found pink.

That is not pink.

- I have a strategy in mind.

Finally something
I'm talented at.

- Oh, my goodness.

- Not a match.

- Numero ocho, por favor.

- Oh.

We're looking for pink,
but we got orange.

But it was a fabulous journey,
wasn't it?

- It was.
- Yes.

- It was.

- Pick another.
- Number two.

- Oh!

Labucci.

Now take a mental picture.

Uh-huh.

Keep it someplace special.
- It's in the wank bank.

Don't you worry.
- [laughs]

This will live
in your dreams forever.

- And in my wank bank.

- [laughs]
Is wank bank a sponsor?

We've tallied up the scores.

And the winner
of today's mini challenge

is Gabriella Labucci.

- Oh!

- Yes!

[applause]

- Gabriella Labucci wins again.

And she's gonna talk
about it for ages.

I won too many challenges.

- I win another mini challenge.

- Condragulations.

You've won your very own
Singer C430 sewing machine.

- [laughs]

- Hint, hint.

[laughter]

- Maybe I could get
the practice in.

Definitely gonna happen.

- Now, for this week's
maxi challenge,

you need to go big or go home

because it's time
for the Snatch Game.

[cheering]

- The game of the century,
b*tch.

Dun, dun, dun, dun.

- #DragRaceDownUnder.

Now, y'all know how this works.

You do a celebrity impersonation

that will make me and the world
laugh our padded asses off.

- I am feeling
equal parts scared

and ready?

- Racers, start your engines.

And may the best drag queen win.

- Whoo!

- [laughs]

[upbeat music]

- [breathing shakily]

- So, girls, it's Snatch Game,
the game of "Drag Race."

- The game
of the f*cking century.

- [laughs] Uh-huh.

Everyone wants to do
really well at Snatch Game.

The goal is to make Ru laugh.

And if you don't her laugh,
you're going home, baby.

I always, you know,
like to see my sisters do well.

- You're a f*cking liar.
- [laughs]

- You lie, you lie.

You never liked a f*cking b*tch.

- But it's also fun to see
someone struggle, isn't it?

- [laughs]

- Oh!
- It's true, hee-hee-hee-hee!

- You're doing Charo.

- I'm doing Charo.
- Charo!

- Time for me to get
the boobs out again, ooh.

I'm ready.

- And?

- Dame Kiri Te Kanawa.

I've chosen her because I
love powerful women of color.

She's an amazing opera singer.

- Oh!
- Oh.

- You've got the lungs
for that, good lung capacity.

- Yes, I do, indeed.

- I'm doing Gloria Swanson.

- [gasps]
- Ooh.

- Amazing.

- The late great
silent film star.

- Yeah, yeah.
- But I'm not gonna be silent.

- No.

- OK, who?

- Naomi Campbell.
- Oh.

So she...
- When she's picking up trash?

- With this?

- Yeah, she had
to do community service.

- I was like,
what the f*ck is that?

- Yes.
- Oh!

There's nothing funny
about Naomi.

If you're going
to make her funny,

you have to be very clever.

- She threw her phone
at her housekeeper,

and she did
the community service.

What do you think
they're saying over there?

- How poorly they'll do... no.
[laughs]

- It's like...
It's almost like pubes.

- [laughs]
- Is it itchy?

- It's a bit itchy.

- The only person who
I think will probably, like,

be very, very good is Flor.

- Yeah.

Flor's cuckoo bananas.

Charo's cuckoo bananas.

Doing them together, oh,
my God, it would be very funny.

- That's fine.
We're going to be talking.

[upbeat music]

- Hey, ladykins.

All: Hi!

- Well, I've come
to check on those snatches.

[laughter]
- Ooh.

- I would like to invite
Signora Gabriella Labucci.

- I'm definitely
feeling pressure

about the Snatch Game
purely because I've

just won an acting challenge.

So I feel like
there's going to be a lot

of eyes on me thinking that,
Gab's gonna smash this.

- Are you Pippi Longstocking?

- Uh, close.
I'm gonna be Emma Watkins.

She is the...
- The actress?

- Yellow Wiggle.

- It's a children's show,
"The Wiggles"?

- Mm-hmm.

- And who are
the other characters

you were thinking of?

- Um, my backup
is Karen Jacobsen.

- Nope, doesn't ring a bell.

- [as Siri]
In 100 meters, turn left.

- Oh, wow.

- Sorry,
I didn't quite catch that.

- Oh, she's Siri.
- Siri and GPS.

- Is your Wiggles character

one that has
a very recognizable voice?

- She doesn't.

However, she also does
a lot of sign language.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Your face...

- Yes?
- Looks like a twat waffle.

- Ah, thank you.
- You're welcome.

- Thank you.

Does that mean something?

- I don't know.
[laughs]

- How about this?
- Oh, I know that one.

[laughter]

- All right, well, listen.

I can't wait to meet
one of the Wiggles.

- I can't wait either.

- All right, well,
thank you very much.

- Thank you.

- !sis, come on over.

Now, you've got a short
little lace front wig there.

- I'm gonna do Gloria Swanson.

I've prepared her really well.
I've watched her films.

I've got her costume.

Yeah, I'm excited to tell
Ru what I've got planned.

- Wow, that's quite
an undertaking.

So are you going to do
the Sunset Boulevard era?

- Yeah.
- Oh, wow.

Have you done
this character before?

- Um, I haven't.
- Yeah?

- But I'm a big fan
of the movie.

- Yeah.

Characteristics,
does she stutter?

Is she drunk?
Does she have a limp?

Does she... you know,
all of those things.

- Yeah, little tics or little,
like, things that they do.

- It's character.

You know,
just keep that in mind.

- OK.

Thank you.
- All right.

Ashley Madison, come on over.

- So I wanted
to choose a character

that I could win with.

- There's a beard.

- And every person
that Ru has ever

crowned the winner
of Snatch Game

has been someone
that she has known.

- I have no idea who that is.

- I did not want
to choose a safe character.

I am, uh, Jesus Christ.

- I love his work.

[laughter]

Jesus as a flaming h*m*.

- Oh, my goodness,
that sounds lovely.

- Yes.

- Did you grow up
with religion at all?

- My parents are
a little bit religious.

When my mom used to take

our shirts off as kids,
it'd be arms up for Jesus.

- Uh-huh.

- I like the idea
of playing a character

that has kind of impacted
the g*y community quite a lot.

- Oh, yeah.

- And so I'm
kind of taking the power back

a little bit, I think.

- Sure, well,
because the Christ character

was never
about that kind of meanness.

- It's about loving everybody.
- Absolutely, absolutely.

Pre-crucifixion or post?

- Post.
- [laughs]

- I am come back.

- Great, well,
listen, I can't wait

for the third coming of Christ.

- I think there's a little bit
more coming than that.

- [laughs]

Lovely Rita.

OK, votes for women.

- She is Kate Sheppard,

pretty much the first woman
that got women to vote

throughout
the whole entire world.

- OK.
- Yeah.

- Sounds like a laugh riot.

Let me hear it.

- Vote for women because
they deserve to vote too.

- All right, all right.

OK.

How are you gonna make sure
you are not in the bottom

for a third time?

- I guess, yeah, I just need
to loosen up a little bit.

- Do you.

- Yeah, exactly.
- Do you.

You know, I've got to be honest,

I'm not sure
about Kate Sheppard.

- OK.

- This is your opportunity
in this competition

to go ba*ls to the wall.

- OK.
- You know?

Who were your other choices?

- I had Mr. Bean or Cardi B.

- Mr. Bean.

Ooh, can I hear a little bit
of your Cardi B?

- [laughs] Um...

I'm just a regular degular
shmegular girl from the Bronx.

Okurrr!

[laughter]

- Well, get back out there,
and I want to laugh.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

[applause]

- [laughs]

I think I'm f*cked.
[wheezes]

- How are you feeling
after that?

- I think, um, Ru wants
a really strong character.

She wants gregarious.

She wants hilarious.

And I'm not sure if I'm gonna
be able to deliver that

with Gloria.

Agh!

You look like you're changing.
- I'm changing.

I just have to go
with what Ru said.

I'm gonna do Cardi B.

- But, on the other hand,
I don't know who else to do.

I've got Elizabeth Taylor
as a backup,

but she's just as...
As Gloria is.

I auditioned
with Donatella Versace.

- Can we hear some
of your Donatella?

- [Italian accent] Hey, Ru, ah,
it's-a me, Donatella Versace.

- Oh, that's good.
- Yeah.

- Did you bring Donatella?

- Not really,
but I can make her.

- She's also been done before.

- I decided not to bring her
because I thought

I'll do something new and fresh.

Yeah, I've only got, like, an
hour and a half to get ready.

I don't know.

[laughs]

- !sis does look
like she's having a bit

of a panic right now.

- Agh!

What am I gonna do?

[upbeat music]

- Welcome, everybody.

I'm RuPaul.

And it's time
to play the Snatch Game.

[laughs]

Please welcome
our first contestant,

actor, dancer,
singer, songwriter

Keiynan Lonsdale is here.

Hi, Keiynan.

- Hey, Ru.

- Now, you were on Snatch Game
of Love a few seasons ago.

- Yes.
- What made you come back?

- Well, I just couldn't
resist the urge

to have a little more snatch
and a little more trauma.

- [laughs]

All right, next up,
it's pit crew member

turned Emmy
award-winning director,

Max Currie is here.

Hi, Max.
- Hi, Ru.

- Does it feel weird to be
here with your clothes on?

- Oh, Ru, these are painted on.

- [laughs]

Are you ready to meet our stars?

- Absolutely.
- We sure are.

- Oh, good.

Up first,
it's the Yellow Wiggle,

Emma Watkins.

- Hi, Ru. How are you?

I'm Emma.
Nice to meet you.

- I always wanted to know,
what is your favorite color?

- Oh, purple.

- [laughs] OK.

Some would think
it might be yellow.

From the House of Versace
is Donatella Versace.

- Buonasera, RuPaul-a.
Come va?

- Come va?

Are there any fashion trends
I should be looking out for?

- Uh, don't-a wear red
or-a yellow.

- [laughs]
- And it's not-a nice.

You look like-a McDonald.

- [laughs]

Good advice.
[laughs]

All right, up next, a true diva,

Dame Kiri Te Kanawa.

- [high-pitched voice]
Kia ora, Ru!

- Yeah,
I've always wanted to ask you,

who is your favorite royal?

- Charles
because he has a big...

[vocalizes]
c*ck.

- [laughs] All right,
up next, Cardi B is here.

- What's up, Ru?

- You got
any new music coming out?

- I sure do.
- Can you give us a little bit?

- Yeah.
Ay, ay, ay.

This p*ssy hot.
Ay, ay, ay.

Just a little snippet.
- Oh, wow.

I smell a hit.

I smell something.

Supermodel Naomi Campbell
is here.

How are you, darling?

- Hello, RuPaul.

As you know, I am the number
one supermodel of the world.

It doesn't matter what
that b*tch Tyra Banks say.

- Oh, is there any advice
to younger models

that you'd like to give?

- I would like to say,
don't start

because you'll never be me.

- OK, all right.

Straight out of Nazareth,
it's Jesus Christ!

- Hey, girl, hey!
- What have you been up to?

- Well, I've just come
back from the dead.

- OK.

- And you may have realized
that 2,000 years ago,

I was Black,
so that's different too.

- [laughs] Well, you know,
representation matters.

- Versatility.
- [laughs]

Well, Jesus, is there anything

you can bless us with
starting out with this game?

- Get your dicks out.
[laughter]

- Please.

- Oh, my God,
we are going to hell.

Last but not least, the
irrepressible Charo is here.

- Hola, amigas.
I'm the pricier banana.

- How is your coochie coochie?

- Chorizo.
- Chorizo?

- Yeah.

- You have chorizo
in your coochie coochie?

- Exactly.
- OK, all right.

First question is for Max.

Dumb Debbie is so dumb.

She thinks
Spankie Jackzon is a blank.

[upbeat music]

What say you, Max?

- Spankie Jackzon
is a new form of foreplay.

- [gasps]
- Let's go to our celebrities.

First up, Emma Watkins.

- Well, I don't know about
the foreplay side of things,

so I wrote "fruit"

because I'm quite fond
of bananas.

- Oh.
- One skin.

- Yeah?
- Two skin.

- OK.
- Three skin.

- Yeah.
- You know what comes next, Ru?

- No.
- The banana, that's right.

- Oh, wow.

Let's move on down
to JC in the MF house.

Son of God.
- Yes, ma'am.

- [laughs]

So, Jesus, when did you start
putting glitter in your beard?

- Um, when I first
started having a**l sex.

- OK, all right.

- Now, when I told everybody
that I wanted to be bred,

they, uh, misinterpreted that.

- [laughs]

- Um, so I assume
with Spankie Jackzon,

it was the same thing,
so I said "loaf of bread."

- [laughs]

- Jesus, is the body
of Christ gluten-free?

- Oh, it's whatever
you want it to be, b*tch.

- What say you, Dame?

- Patero.
- What are you saying?

- Fart.
- OK.

You know, in some circles, that
could be a form of foreplay,

depending on the circles
that you keep.

Let's go to the judges
and see if that is a match.

[buzzer blares]
Oh, it's not a match.

What say you, Donatella?

- I say-a Dumb Debbie think
Spankie Jackzon is a putana.

- A putana.
- Si.

Spankie Jackzon is a sl*t.

- Oh.
[laughs]

- She get around.
- She gets around.

- Si, get around-a.

- Donatella, are you familiar
with Gabriella Labucci?

- Gabriella Labucci.

- Yeah.
- She is also a putana.

- [laughs]

- She is a sl*t
from town to town.

- [laughs]

Let's move on down to Charo.

Coochie, coochie.

Dumb Debbie is so dumb,

she thinks
Spankie Jackzon is a...

- Paella, because you
can see her shrimp

from those disgusting legs.

- Not a match,
but a delicious main course.

Well, next question
is for Keiynan.

When a UFO
recently landed in Sydney,

people quickly realized
the aliens were q*eer

when they said,
take me to your blank.

What say you, Keiynan?

- Take me to your dark room
in the opera house.

- Very specific.
- Mm-hmm.

- All right,
let's go to our celebrities.

Dame Kiri, what say you?

- an*s!

- Take me to your an*s?
- Yeah.

- Well,
let me check with the judges

and let's see if that's a match.

Oh, it is a match.

Well, see, now,
I got to tell you,

in the Northern hemisphere,
that would not be a match.

But here down under,
that's a match.

Cardi B?

- I've got a few
of these in my house.

I said h*s.

- Ooh, take me to your h*.
- Mm-hmm.

[buzzer blares]
- Not a match there.

What say you, Naomi?

- I said God because the God
himself, Gianni Versace.

- Rest in peace-a.

- He's not my God.

- Speaking of, let's move
on down to JC, in the house.

What's up, JC?
- Hey, girl, hey.

- [laughs]

You're no stranger
to dark rooms, are you?

- Never.
Only for three days.

- Yeah.
What say you?

- Well, obviously,
I'm back from the dead,

after how y'all treated me
last time.

- Yes, I... listen, I want
to apologize for that, OK?

- Thank you.

- After all these years,
you're still pissed?

- Pissed, more pissed
than Nana's bed sheets.

So I said "urinal."

Take me to your urinal.
- Take me to your urinal.

Let's check with the judges
and see if that is a match.

Oh, it is a match!

My goodness.

Wow.

Keiynan, you're doing so well.

At the beach, I found
a message in a bottle.

It said, I'm trapped
on a deserted island

with Jason Momoa.

Please send blank.

Max, what say you?

- Jason's a big man.
- Yes.

- So I think it says,
please send amyl.

- We actually sent her
home earlier.

Oh, I... you're thinking of...

Right, you're thinking
of amyl nitrate.

Naomi Campbell,
supermodel of the world.

We're looking for amyl.
Do you have some?

- I said diamonds,
but not blood diamonds

because they tried to make
me go to court for that.

Is that... is that a camera?

- Yes, it is.
- I said no... no cameras!

- Oh, oh.
Was that your cell phone?

- Yes.

- Oh, it's one of the big ones
from the '80s, isn't it?

- Oh, that's
the only one to have.

- Let's move on down to Cardi B.

- So I just said Nicki Minaj,
because get her out of here.

- Please send Nicki Minaj.

- Yeah, okurrr!
- OK.

- [laughs] What say you, Charo?

- Her name is Izma.

- And who is that?

- My dearest friend.

- Your dearest friend?
- Yes.

- We were looking for amyl.

[buzzer blares]

Donatella Versace.

- I said a lubricant-a.

- A lubricant.

- Si, lubricant-a
is very good-a.

You can always have a bit
of help downstairs-a.

You know, in the back door-a,
it needs a little squeaky,

squeaky, oil-a for back door.

- Yes, well, Donatella,
it is from the same drawer,

but not a match.

- The bottom-a drawer?

- Well, it's the top drawer
in the nightstand.

- Ah, behind the sock-a.

- Yeah.
[laughs]

- Si, the Versace sock.

- Yeah.

All right, Keiynan,
you are up next.

Michelle Visage
has found a new way

to stay in shape
while down under.

Instead of riding a bike,
she rides a blank.

What say you?
- A boxing kangaroo.

- I like that.
What say you, Emma?

- From what I've heard,
she likes to go up and down,

and up and down,
and up and down.

- Oh.
- So I wrote "pogo stick."

- OK. Not a match.

Donatella Versace?

- Michelle,
she likes-a ba*ls, OK?

- ba*ls?

- She want
to ride the soccer team.

Any team you like, she's there.

- I got to tell you,
that sounds like my Michelle.

- She, uh, she's a putana.

- Yeah, well... [laughs]

Well, it's not a match.
What say you, Charo?

- Maracas!

Maracas, maracas,
maracas, maracas, maracas.

- Now, Charo...
- Cha, cha, b*tch.

Cha, cha, b*tch.

- She rides a...

Have you not mastered
the English language?

- No.
- Well, OK.

Well, simple answer.

All right, we are looking
for boxing kangaroo, Cardi B.

What say you?

- Yeah,
so when I'm here down under,

I love to go on a bus
to my lipo surgeon.

- Oh, that's how
she stays in shape.

I was wondering.

Unfortunately,
that's not a match.

Now, JC, we're looking
for boxing kangaroo,

one of God's creatures.

- Now, I wear boxers
because I prefer

to have no other
appendages nailed down.

- [laughs]
- So I said "p*nis"!

- Oh, so she rides a p*nis?
- Yes, ma'am.

- OK, well, not a match, but...

- I forgive you.
- Yeah.

[wheezes]
Thank you, JC.

[bell tolls]
Uh-oh.

That sound means God is very
angry, or we are out of time.

So until we meet again,
remember,

if you can't love your snatch,

how in the hell are you
gonna love somebody else's?

Can I get an amen
up in here, Jesus?

- Amen, b*tch!

- [laughs]

All right, everybody,
see you next time.

[upbeat music]

- We're back.

- Hi!
- Coochie coo!

- It's a new day
in the Werk Room,

and I am feeling amazing.

- Good morning, girls.

- Finally, I have done something

while I've been here.

I've just gone through Snatch
Game and done really well.

- I mean,
I don't know about y'all,

but I think I did stupendously

and I did an incredible job.

- For real?

- [laughs]

- I was like, OK.

- Snatch Game is hard.

And I thought I was
gonna do something else,

and then it didn't happen.

But I do know
that !sis here was amazing,

and Ashley Madison.

- Yeah.
- You guys were incredible.

- Thank you.

- So you should feel very,
very proud.

- [in Italian accent]
OK-a, thank you very much.

- OK-a.
- [laughs]

- I do think that,
if there is a top three,

I think it's gonna be !sis,
and I think it might be you.

- I love you forever!

- Let's get the f*ck into drag.

- Yes, God!
- Pow!

- There were a lot
of very flat line performances.

And I don't really
know where I stand.

I think
you've got this in the bag.

- Thank you.

- I think it's gonna be !sis.
- Thank you, Flor.

- Like,
!sis and I can be in the top

because we both made Ru laugh.

- So you think
Bumpa's gonna be in the top?

- I think so.
- Hmm.

- Why?
Do you think it should be you?

- Not really.

You know, just wondering.

- Why? What's happening?

- Nothing.

[tense music]

- Maybe Charo could be
in the top with us,

but I don't know
if she gave Charo enough.

You know, but it's hard.

Snatch Game's, like,
the most difficult game.

- Yeah, it's made
and broken queens, huh?

- Yeah.

- At the top one minute,
bye-bye.

- Yeah.
- At the bottom.

- Story of my life right now.

I don't think I did great,

but I don't think
I was horrible.

So we just have to walk this
runway and see what happens.

[upbeat music]

[RuPaul's "Cover Girl"]

- [singing] Cover girl,
put some bass in your walk

Head to toe,
let your whole body talk

- Eyebrow.
- Ooh.

- Yes.

- Welcome to the main stage

of "RuPaul's Drag Race
Down Under."

Judges, I'm going
to ask you a question

that did not make
yesterday's Snatch Game,

starting with Michelle Visage.

Spankie Jackzon's
black panties made

such a big impression
last season,

she decided to blank them.

- She decided to bronze them.

- Ooh, OK.

Rhys Nicholson, same question.

- Well, like any
self-respecting drag queen,

she recorded an album with them.

- Ah.
- It's all covered.

- Keiynan Lonsdale,
what say you?

- Ru, I'm gonna say
Spankie decided to wash them.

At least, I hope she did.

- Finally.

- Good answers, but the match
we were looking for is,

Spankie decided
to burn her black panties.

- Ah.

- And for that,
Spankie, we salute you.

This week,
we challenged our queens

to snatch our attention

with their funniest
celebrity impersonations.

And tonight on the runway,
category is

Night
of a Thousand Kylie Minogues.

Racers, start your engines,

and may the best drag queen win.

- [whispering]
I'll tell you what I want.

- Category is Night
of a Thousand Kylie Minogues.

First up,
from the Showgirl Tour,

Bumpa Love.

- Ooh.
- Ooh.

- Ooh, girl,
she looks plucked up.

- [laughs]

- I love what I'm wearing.

My snatch is snatched!

The thighs are huge.

The legs are long.

And I feel very elongated.

I'm the tallest queen
in the room.

- That's right,
b*tch, hit them marks.

- I'm under so much pressure
right now.

And somehow, I managed
to get rid of all that noise,

and she's out, and I think
I f*cking nailed it.

- From the "In My Arms"
music video,

Ashley Madison.

- This is one of my favorite
things I've ever worn.

I'm giving a different
silhouette on the runway

that the judges
haven't seen before.

So I think
I'm giving versatility.

- "In My Arms"?
I think you mean "In My Legs."

- Yeah.

- I chose this outfit
because this is one

that Kylie Minogue herself
said was one

of her most iconic looks.

I feel sexy.
I feel flirty.

This is a great look.

- Hooded for your pleasure.

- Yeah.

Up next, the green fairy
from "Moulin Rouge!", Flor.

Oh, I think she's had
a taste of that potion.

- So I watched
the "Moulin Rouge!" movie,

and then she comes
from the bottle.

And then, like, all the boys
are looking at her.

And I'm like, oh, yes,
b*tches, look at me.

She's practicing absinthe-ness.

- Oh, she's Catholic.

- I love Kylie because she
is just, like, gorgeous

and feeling herself, and, ah.

- Gone in a poof.

- What'd you call me?
- [chuckles]

- Also from the "In My Arms"
music video, Rita Menu.

- Doesn't everybody like
wearing a hoodie?

- God, look at all
those Post-it Notes.

She must be busy.

- I'm very proud
to show this on the runway

because I just wanted
to kind of take it

more on a drag aspect
and not do a replica of it.

- Beautiful, you never looked
more beautiful.

- You're talking to me, right?
- Yes.

- Thank you.

- Your hand applied each
and every single square on it,

so just shows all the hard work
that I've put in,

as well as my designer.

I am so confident
wearing this outfit.

- All right, here is the Kyborg
from Kylie's Fever Tour.

Hollywould Star.

- I know that I'm serving
love at first sight.

And I know you can't
get me out of your head

with this garment.

- Oh, that reminds me, I have
some welding that needs done.

- This beautiful armor.

This sexy, short diamante piece.

I am feeling delicious.
I'm feeling sexy.

I'm feeling powerful.

- Oh, she's got
a slit up the back too.

- I'm living
my robot fantasy, honey.

- Also, serving the green fairy
from "Moulin Rouge!",

!sis Avis Loren.

- Somebody was absinthe
from class today.

- I'm walking down
in my wonderful green look.

- Is she here
to take our drink order?

- I look f*cking stunning.

- I wonder if she stoned
those tights herself.

- I'm sure she did.
- I didn't.

[laughter]

I paid someone else.

- From the premiere
of "Delinquents,"

Gabriella Labucci.

- Kylie had a simple dress
with an XO pattern on it.

I have decided to cut
this into a two-piece.

However, the Os on my t*tties
expose my t*tties.

- Careful, Gabriella,
or you're gonna put somebody's

eyes out with those things.

- I'm a little bit nervous
after week one

when Ashley got critiqued
for having her n*pples out,

but you know what,
better the nipple, you know.

- It's milking time.
- Yeah.

Kia ora, queens.
All: Kia ora!

- Aussie, Aussie, Aussie.
All: Oi, oi, oi!

- Now, based on
your Snatch Game performances

and your Kylie Minogue
presentations,

I've made some decisions.

When I call your name,
please step forward.

[tense music]

Hollywould Star.

Gabriella Labucci.

You are safe.

- Thank you very much.

- You may leave the stage.

Now it's time
for the judges' critiques,

starting with Bumpa Love.

- Opera legend Dame Kiri.

Now, in the beginning,
I think you were really in it,

and then I think you got lost.

- I think you fell into the trap

some people do in Snatch Game,
which is,

what if we took a dignified
person and made them a sl*t?

It kind of stayed there
for a while.

Tonight, though, bloody hell.

- This is so beautiful.

You're taking your time now.

You're hitting your marks.

- You had such a beautiful flow
and elegance.

- That green with
your skin tone and the makeup,

I wish the same
attention to detail

had been placed on Snatch Game.

There weren't a lot
of laughs there.

- No, but thank you.

I really want to listen
and learn, so thank you.

- Ashley Madison.

- You took a huge swing.

It just worked.

Even though it was a g*y Jesus,

it was done
with this weird dignity.

- I mean, look who's f*cking
turned up to the competition.

I think you did
the very smart thing

of picking someone
that no one can prove otherwise

in any particular way.

- [laughs] It was so much fun.

When did you know
you could do this?

- When we were
playing Snatch Game.

[laughter]

I've never been an actor.

I've always thought
that I've been able

to be off the cuff
with friends and things,

and so I was hoping that I
could use that kind of energy.

Definitely didn't want
to offend anybody,

but I still wanted
to have fun with it.

- You did so well.

And tonight,
this was really fun.

- !sis Avis Loren.

- Donatella Versace.

Come stai?
- Ah, bene, grazie.

- It was so strong and so funny.

- I felt like
I could relax watching you

because if anything
was gonna go wrong,

you were gonna handle sh*t,
handle business.

- Everything about this,
the proportions, everything,

the hair, everything
about this is right on point,

as was your Donatella Versace.

- You have to stay
on this path that you're on.

- Just beautiful.
Rita Menu, my goodness.

- Quite possibly
the most beautiful

that you've looked
in this competition.

- The blending
and the highlights,

just remarkable.

This is your look.
This is it.

This is it forever
and ever and ever.

- We're gonna check.
- Yeah.

Now let's go to
your Snatch Game.

There was no character
in your character.

You're missing elements
that are just Cardi B.

- The accent was
like taking a Kon-Tiki tour

around the globe.

Just was a bit of a misfire.

- Yeah, I was
in my head a little bit,

but initially I actually
had a lot of fun with it.

- Who were the other characters
you would have done?

- Kate Sheppard or Mr. Bean.

- Yeah.
Yeah, I'm glad you didn't.

- Yeah, me too.
- Mrs. Bean.

- He doesn't talk.

- [muttering]
- Exactly.

- Flor.

- Charo is one of the most
incredible human beings.

I just wanted more comedy
and more laughter.

- It just wasn't quite
landing every time.

- You are naturally funny.

The problem was
that you boxed yourself in

trying to do an impersonation.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- Did a f*cking
strong runway tonight.

And you're really up there.

- The bodice
is absolutely stunning.

- Thank you.

- OK.

Thank you, queens.
I think we've heard enough.

While you untuck
in the Werk Room,

the judges and I
will deliberate.

You may leave the stage.

- Hi.

- Come through.
Come and dish.

Come and spill.
- Come take a seat.

- I'm very shocked
knowing that Holly

and Gabby are both sitting
there drinking their drinks.

I think they deserve
to be in the bottom two.

- Oh, I've had
too much to drink.

I'm seeing double.

- Am I surprised?

Yeah.
But you know what?

It doesn't matter.

Because the judges thought it
was good enough to be safe,

then that's good for me.

- Who's top?
Who's bottom?

- Ashley Madison for the win.

- Oh, it could be...
I think it might be !sis.

It literally could
go either way.

- It could.

- To do well in it
after being so unsure

of what I was gonna do...

- Yeah.
- I'm blown away.

I am feeling so good
after these critiques.

- Two Melbourne girls
for the win.

- Yeah.

I think it's these two...

- I'm in the bottom.
- In the bottom.

I think so.

Bumpa did get
some negative critiques.

- Yeah.

- Unfortunately,
I've landed back here again.

It just was a big swing
and a huge miss.

- I made her laugh, but...

I thought I was gonna be safe,
but, well, clearly not.

- So you delivered
Charo as Charo,

and you didn't really
level her up, which I think

was what the judges
were sort of touching on.

- OK.
- Yeah.

- Are you OK?
- Oh, I don't know.

It's too much.

Oh, my God.
- Don't cry, please.

- Oh.
I'm so disappointed.

- Also, a huge pressure.
- Oh, God, please.

- Obviously, what is
happening right now is just,

like, you know,
a huge kick on my a*s.

I need to, like, step it up.

That's what I have to do.

I don't know.

There's just so many emotions,
and I'm like,

oh, I need
to learn to lip-synch.

OK, so I need
to practice this song.

Goodbye.
- Get it, girl.

- Whoever is lip-synching,
please just let this be

the fire under you that
f*cking puts on a great show

and keeps you
in this competition, yeah?

- Yeah.

So I think it still could be me,

but I'm f*cking ready to go.

Double save, double win?
- Double win, double save.

- Double save, double win.
- Who knows?

- You never know.

- All right.

Just between us kangaroos,
what do you think?

Bumpa Love.

- She was straightaway
sucking off King Charles.

- Yes.

- And I went, oh,
I don't know if she's

in control of this horse.

I'm a dirty comedian.
I love a dirty joke.

But there's got to be a bit of
light and shade for it to work.

- The problem was,
it wasn't even funny.

- She's the most
seasoned queen here,

and I really expected her
to do better.

You know,
not a great night for her,

other than the showgirl,
which was so beautiful.

Ashley Madison, Michelle?

- She chose to play Jesus
Christ with a glitter beard.

Again, this is going
to be polarizing,

but that's what drag is.

And she delivered the funny.

- Any kind of swing
that was taken

wasn't at the idea of Jesus.

It was about the history
around Jesus.

And I find that
to be really deft

and a smart choice to have made.

- I was just impressed
and inspired

by the courageous
kind of performance.

- Picking Jesus
in the context of then,

he was the person
hanging out with some

of the looser units
of that time.

Like, there's a good chance
if Jesus was around now,

he would have been
a guest judge on next season.

- That's true, yes.

I'm a big fan
of the legend of Jesus,

the whole idea of,

he represents
the potential in everyone.

And who knew that Ashley Madison

had that kind of potential?

On the runway,
I love that she showed her legs

and she did
a different silhouette.

I love the outfit.

!sis Avis Loren.

- She was so funny
from the first question, Ru.

- She took a swing
at what you were wearing,

and that is a ballsy move.

Like, I've never
looked directly at you.

- [laughs]

- It just kept going
and going and going.

- I thought
she did such a great job.

And she's one of those kids who

really does pay attention
to detail.

- On the runway, you had
two green fairies tonight,

but hers was more evolved.

- The proportions
of everything were on point,

and those details were present
in her Donatella also.

- Rita Menu. Michelle?

- Never looked better
than she did tonight.

She was smarter.

To think she's a curvier girl,

let me make the squares
a little bit larger,

and that worked.

Now, Snatch Game, she,
for me, was the biggest miss.

- It was tough
to watch at times.

Like, it was kind
of a Cardi B-minus, Cardi F.

- Mm.
- School reference?

- I think ultimately,
she wasn't present

in the challenge,
and so it was lost,

it was confusing.

- On the runway, though,
it's so lovely

to see her blossoming this way.

- She hit her mark
with the look,

the proportions, the face.

I wish she had hit her mark
in the Snatch Game.

Flor?

- It's an interesting choice
to pick someone

who is already funny
in the Snatch Game,

I think, sometimes.

You can't kind of top someone
who's already kind of funny...

Well, I mean, you can try.

- And it made me kind of sad
because I love Charo so much,

and she's such an icon.

On the runway,
the green fairy, pretty,

she just looked like
!sis' sad green sister,

apart from
that beautiful corset.

- You know, Flor hasn't
quite been able to harness

her own natural charisma.

She's naturally funny,
but she's not able

to do it on cue.

That takes time
in this business to understand.

All right, silence.

I've made my decision.

Bring back my girls.

Welcome back, ladies.

I've made some decisions.

!sis Avis Loren,
between your Snatch Game

and your runway presentation,
I can't get you out of my head.

Ashley Madison, your Snatch Game

was divinely inspired.

And your runway made us go, wow.

Ashley Madison, condragulations,

you're the winner
of this week's challenge.

- This is
absolutely mind-blowing.

Thank you so much.

- And you've won $3,000
from Team Mate.

- Thank you so much.

- !sis, you are safe.

You two may join
the other girls.

Bumpa Love,
your runway was a hit.

But in the Snatch Game,
you didn't put on a show, girl.

Rita Menu,
your makeup gave me fever.

But your Snatch Game
was Cardi D-minus.

Flor, on the runway,
you were supernova.

But your Snatch Game
made me want to cancel.

Bumpa Love, you are safe.

You may join the other girls.

- I'm feeling really sad,
but I've lip-synched once,

I won that.

I lip-synched twice,
so third time's a charm.

- Rita, Flor, sorry, my dears,

but you are up for elimination.

- f*ck.

Like, this is the time for me
to wake up and bring it on.

- Two queens stand before me.

Ladies, this is
your last chance to impress me

and save yourself
from elimination.

The time has come for you

to lip-synch for your life.

Good luck, and don't f*ck it up.

[Kylie Minogue's "Secrets"]

- [singing] Still don't know
how he got my number

Thought I got him out of my life

But I agreed to see him
just one time

Never thought
I'd fall for him twice

Ooh, you've got
to hear my confession

I believe it's long overdue

I can't think
of living without you

I'd understand if that's
what you'd want to do

There are secrets
that you never knew

Secrets in a private room

Secrets that I kept from you

Pillow talk in the afternoon

- Rita is doing good.

Flor is doing so well.

The interesting thing
about this song

is that it's not a flips and
kicks and splits performance.

- [singing]
Pillow talk in the afternoon

- This could come
down to the wire.

- [singing]
Secrets that you never knew

Secrets in a private room

Secrets that I get from you

Pillow talk in the afternoon

Secrets

- [laughs]

[tense music]

Ladies, I've made my decision.

Flor, shantay, you stay.

You may join the other girls.

- Thank you very much.
Thank you.

Love you, Rita.
- Love you too.

- Rita Menu,
this was just the appetizer.

Get ready for the main course.

Now, sashay away.

- Thank you so much.

It means so much coming
from such a small town.

This was just a dream,
and I made it, so thank you.

- Thank you.

- [breathing shakily]

- You're inspiring.
- Ugh.

Rita Menu should have read
a f*cking book.

[laughs]
Bye.

[laughter]

[sighs]
I dreamt of this one day.

I didn't think
it would come so soon,

so I'm so proud of myself.

I mean, there's things
that I wish I should have done,

but I did the best I could do.

Deep down, I know who I am.

I just need to open it up
and just go for it.

I'm gonna miss this so much.

I'm just gonna run around, OK?
[laughs]

That's what
I'm most excited for,

to see what
the future holds for Rita.

Watch out, world.

Rita Menu is here
to take the snacks.

- Condragulations, queens.

And remember,
if you can't love yourself,

how in the hell are you
gonna love somebody else?

Can I get an amen up in here?
- Amen!

- All right,
now let the music play.

[upbeat electronic music]

Next time on "RuPaul's
Drag Race Down Under"...

As two competing girl groups,
you'll be singing

and dancing to the original
song "BMX b*tches."

- Ooh.

- So what happened was...
- Oh, sh*t.

[dramatic music]

- Cross.

Not bad.

It kind of looks
like a dog peeing.

Let's hope it gets better

before we put that
in front of Ru.

- You didn't miss a beat.

- To me, that's what drag is.

- You are a f*cking b*tch.