09x04 - He Pretends to Be Human

[bunniefuu]

For the first
at least couple weeks,

the story was everywhere.

It was in the L.A. Times,
it was in,

you know, every newspaper
that you would read.

It's been 20 years
since any of these

stories were in the newspaper
or anything like that.

So I thought this whole thing
was behind me.

But 18 months ago,
I was

diagnosed with an aggressive
form of cancer.

And ultimately, I'm looking
at not too much longer,

you know, to live.

And if I want to say something,
the time is now.

I thought I might as well
leave a voice for people

to hear,
and this is my voice

that I wanted to add
to the conversation.

Yeah, it's okay.
It's okay, buddy.

You know, it's hard to

call someone you married evil,
because you don't

ever really want to
say that,

but I think I always saw
the potential for evil in him.

Maybe it wasn't a fully formed
evil at the time,

but it was definitely
simmering in there.

It's a scary thought
that there are people that

are just walking around out
there pretending to be...

human beings.

This is the only existing
photo from any time that

we, you know, had together.

This is a photo of Wayne
and I at our wedding reception.

We had eloped.

We were married
at 19 years old.

I took a lot of pride in
dating a Marine.

It all falls into that
romantic mystique of

the tall, dark stranger.

You know, handsome,
doesn't say much,

that whole package deal...
It just didn't

turn out the way
that I had hoped.

He always had all of these
dark fantasies in his head.

I'm not proud

that my first husband
was a serial k*ller.

We hadn't lived together
before we got married.

So now, all of a sudden,
we're in each other's space.

And there was a distinct
change in how he treated me.

It became obvious that
he wanted a trophy wife.

One day, he brought me
a gift, and I was surprised.

Hey, what's this?

A little something for you.

He didn't really give gifts,
celebrate anything,

even birthdays
or anything like that.

And when I opened it up,
it was a bikini.

Very skimpy.

I could tell
immediately what it was for.

It was for show.

Wow.

What happened
that weekend was we had

a pool party with,
you know, his friends.

He wanted everybody to see
how sexy his wife is.

He reveled in the other
Marines being jealous of him.

I mean,

don't you think I should wear
something a little less...

- I don't know, revealing?
- No.

I was definitely an introvert.

I had a tendency normally to,

like, stay inside when
they would have the parties.

But he wouldn't let me.

He wanted me out there
wearing that bikini.

What, you don't like it?

No, it's great.
Thank you.

I felt humiliated.

I felt cheap.

I felt used.

Well, hurry up. Put it on.
They'll be here soon.

I felt objectified,
and he didn't care.

It didn't matter how I felt.

It was what he wanted.

I was a possession.

I was an object,
the shiny object

that... that he wanted
to show off,

but I got a gift,

and I certainly wasn't
going to tell him

that I wasn't gonna
wear it

or that I didn't like it,
because that would result

in him getting mad

because I rejected a present
that he finally gave me.

So that was when he started
objectifying me,

and then I just became...

disposable.

Every once in a while, Wayne
and I would get together

with his friends and go over
to their house and play cards.

This one night, I...

didn't throw down
the card he wanted.

- We're leaving.
- Why are we leaving?

Because, you screwed
everything up.

Wayne
grabs me and says,

"We're going home,"
and I get in the car.

He was driving, and all of
a sudden, it's like all his rage

started to come out,
and he started driving,

like, really fast.

Wayne, slow down!

I screamed at the beginning

to, you know, stop, stop,
stop, slow down.

But me screaming at him was
just making him drive faster.

Please, Wayne, slow down.
I don't understand.

I was petrified.

I was terrified of what
he was doing and had

no control over it and
basically was at his mercy.

Just slow down.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

He got, like, a sick glee

out of me cowering.

- Stop, okay?
- You want me to stop? Fine.

He was getting pleasure
out of scaring me.

He was happy that
his intimidation was working.

He didn't care if
he k*lled himself, too.

You could have
k*lled us!

It was more important
to him that I was scared

and that I...
He was making his point.

All of it was
an intimidation thing,

to let me know he was angry.

And I also honestly believe
that he was angry that

he had to control himself in
front of his friends.

You are such an idiot!

Can't you do anything right?

In his mind,

I think I wasn't
living up to quite

the expectations that
he had been hoping for.

And those started
being reflected

in how he treated me.

What was I thinking,

marrying a stupid b*tch
like you?

The criticisms began
at that point in time,

little put-downs,
the micro-aggressions.

You know, you're not
as hot as you think you are!

It would be nice if
you put in a little effort.

I could never make
a correct decision.

There was always something
wrong, so I worked all day.

Then I had to come home
and create these,

you know, three-course meals.

I work all day, and
this is what I come home to?!

Nothing was ever
good enough.

It wasn't immediately
a nightmare.

That developed over
a period of time.

It creeps in slowly.

There was one time early in
the marriage where Wayne and I

were sitting down watching TV,

having a glass of wine.

And we started to talk about
his father,

and he didn't want to.

How come I've never met
your father?

He really didn't talk
a lot about his childhood.

It was not a conversation
that he wanted to have.

Don't you think I should know
my father-in-law?

No, you don't need
to meet him.

But I had only
met his mother,

so I kind of pressed
the situation.

Why don't you ever want
to talk about him?

Because I don't, okay?
Can you just drop it?

Every time I said
another word,

it just got him angrier
and angrier and angrier.

What's the big deal anyway?

You've met my parents
a thousand times.

All of a sudden,
he exploded.

Just shut up!
What is the matter with you?!

I got up off the couch
to get away from him,

and he got up
after me.

I said stay out of
my business.

I'm sorry.

And punched the wall
next to my head.

When he put his fist through
the wall, I mean,

it was just close enough to my
head to where it was a threat,

but far enough from my head
to where

I knew he wasn't actually
trying to hit me.

When I say you stop
talking, you're gonna do it.

I came from a household
that didn't have that type of

violence and anger,
and it made me very fearful.

One way or another,

you are gonna learn
to listen to me.

Then he started
manipulating me with

the intimidation of
what he could do.

All of my confidence
in myself was gone.

You end up at that point where
you just start agreeing with

everything and you just,
"Yes, it's my fault.

I'm sorry."
You start apologizing

for things that aren't
your fault.

So I think there was already
some warning signals.

But I didn't want to
communicate that to my parents,

because that would show that
I had made a bad decision.

And I wanted them to
believe that,

you know, everything
was going great.

So I lost that line of
communication with people

who love me, because I never
told them the truth.

I kept

what was starting to happen
to myself.

And that's when he started to
become more and more extreme.

The pause...

right when he said, "Do you
realize that what you did

was wrong?"
And there was that

seconds long pause there?

I think that's very telling.

Even though he turned himself
in, I don't believe that Wayne

ever did really understand
that it was wrong

and it was something that
he shouldn't be doing.

It took him a while to...
To give that answer.

Wayne's whole goal in life
was to have sex

and to have it every single day
at least once.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Wayne wouldn't take
no for an answer,

so if I didn't feel like it,
if I didn't feel good,

I was sick,
none of that mattered.

He would keep me up
all night long.

Wayne, I'm tired.
I just want to get some sleep.

Won't take long.

I learned fairly quickly
that it was easier

to just say yes
as soon as possible,

get it over with,
and then be done.

I didn't even think about it
as making love anymore.

It was just like a chore
that I had to do.

So it ended up that

virtually every single day

I felt like I was being r*ped.

And he never considered it

to be sexual as*ault or r*pe.

He was just trying to get
what was due him.

But for me,
it was degrading.

I felt like...
I didn't know this person.

I didn't wanna be with
this person.

But it's not as simple

as people think to just
walk out the door.

That's always the first
gut reaction.

Well, just leave.

He's got the checking account.

Wayne had constantly threatened
me that he would come find me.

Emotionally a*usive people
cut you off from everyone,

and they make sure that
you have no avenue to leave.

My parents had initially been
angry that I had eloped,

so I felt like I burned
my bridges with my parents,

and I didn't have
any friends of my own.

So I was all by myself,
and...

in my mind,
I could not see a way out.

When I told Wayne
I was pregnant,

Wayne's initial reaction was
definitely, um,

"You're getting rid of it.
We're not having a baby."

So Wayne put me
in the car and forced me

to go to the clinic
to get an ab*rtion.

Before they take you in to have
any kind of procedure,

they do an interview with you.

Take your time to answer
these next few questions, okay?

Are you sure this is
what you want?

Is anyone forcing you
to do this?

And I actually turned to
the girl, and I asked her,

I said,
"What if I said yes?"

And she said
we wouldn't do it.

I just need to be sure that this
is something you really want.

And at that point, they kind
of ended the interview.

They told me to go think about
it, and I came back out into

the waiting room where
he was waiting, and, um,

I told him what I had said.

And at that point,
he dragged me

out of the office
into the hallway

and pushed me up
against the wall.

And told me in no uncertain
terms that if I didn't walk out

of there with
an ab*rtion today,

that I shouldn't bother
coming home.

You are getting it done today,
got it?

I still felt helpless.

I still felt like
I had no place to go.

I was trapped.
Then he said, "Go tell her

that you're ready."

The decision was plain.

I didn't wanna have
a child with him.

There was no way that I really

wanted to bring his baby
into the world.

I went and spoke
to the nurse again,

and I ended up going through
with the ab*rtion.

It did begin to escalate to
a point where it was not

only sex,
but fairly severe bondage.

He found a deck
of playing cards that

the back of each card had

a woman in some kind of
rope bondage.

And so he wanted
to try those

types of rope bondage things
on me.

This is when his obsession

with breasts became
even more pronounced.

Wayne had decided
that he wanted to

make molds of my boobs
out of wax.

So he melted down a whole
bunch of wax and then made me

dip my breasts into the bowl
until they were covered with

the hot wax.

And then I had to sit there
and let them cool.

It was all about
the objectification.

It was all about
what he wanted.

He made a comment that

if he could just take a sheet
and cut out the holes around

my boobs, he could just
put the sheet over me,

he would be just as satisfied.

He decided that when I came
home and I was at home,

I shouldn't wear any clothes.

So I had to come home,
take off all my clothes,

cook naked,

walk around, and he could touch
anywhere on my body

he wanted any time.

And I was just like a...
Almost like a mannequin doll.

You just learn to just
keep quiet

and to let him
play with his toy.

Every time he dehumanized me,
every time he... he fetishized

a piece or a part of me was
humiliating and degrading.

He had always made it clear

that women were objects
and disposable.

He cared about my pieces
and parts, but not me.

The Marine Corps
had a bunch of, um,

cabins that they kept up
in Big Bear.

So Wayne and a bunch of
his friends had decided to

go up there for the weekend,
and I get a phone call.

Hello?

Oh, hey. Hi, Bill.
How are you?

And the phone call is from
one of

the guys that he's with up
in Big Bear.

And they asked me, Kelly,
have you heard from Wayne?

No, I haven't seen him.

And I said, "No,

why would I hear from Wayne?"

"Well, if he calls,
tell him to come back.

It's not as bad as he thinks."

Yeah, sure, I'll tell him.

And now I'm sitting there all
alone waiting, waiting, waiting.

Probably a couple hours passed,

and Wayne calls,

and he says, "I need your help.

I need you to come pick me up."

What happened?

"I'm in trouble,
and the police are looking

for me," and I go, "Well,
what did you do?"

And he said, "They think
I r*ped somebody."

Wayne.

Him and a friend of his
hooked up with these two girls,

and I think they were
maybe, like,


or something like that.

He's being accused of
statutory r*pe.

He obviously knew that
the girls were underage,

but he did not accept
any responsibility at all.

He did not feel like he had
done anything wrong.

- Just come get me.
- Okay.

In his view, the only issue
was getting caught.

He just didn't have empathy.

The whole process
went on for over a year.

And then all of a sudden,
the charges were just dropped.

Once the entire issue with

the statutory r*pe charge
was resolved,

I had gotten a new job,

and I was starting to
make friends.

And I was starting
to make male friends.

While Wayne was staying
on base,

I took the opportunity
to go out to dinner,

to socialize, to feel free,
and it felt good.

Hey, thanks
for driving me home.

Are you kidding me?
Don't mention it.

But this one night,
I went to dinner with Bob

after work, he drove me home,
and as we were driving up to

the house, I realized that
Wayne's car was parked there.

- Oh, no.
- And I was terrified.

- Don't stop, go. Go!
- Why? What's wrong?

That's Wayne's car...
He's home.

Just drive right past.
Don't slow down.

I didn't know exactly
what was happening,

but I knew he was home.

Later on, he told me
the story of what

had happened that night.

He had got it in his head
that I was cheating on him.

And he had taken
his compound bow

and hid in the bushes

outside of the house,

waiting for me to come home.

He waited out there like three
hours hunkered down

in his cammies...
I definitely believe

that if I'd gotten out of
the car, and Bob had got...

Gotten out of the car even
to just walk me to the door,

that he would have shot him.

Luckily, we didn't stop,
because he was

a pretty darn good shot
with a bow and arrow.

I remember
the morning vividly.

He was watching TV, and I was
ironing his cammies,

and I just said,
"I can't do this anymore."

- Wayne, I can't take it anymore.
- Excuse me?

I can't live like this.

I've seen what other people
are like.

And I know that I don't have
to live like this anymore.

I want a divorce.

- I was expecting this.
- At first,

Wayne came across, um,
like, fairly casual about it.

Like talking about divvying up
our stuff.

And he said he was gonna
take my motorcycle,

and I just went,
"No, I want it."

Wayne, you can't take
the bike.

I had friends that ride,

and so I wanted to have
a motorcycle to ride with them.

And I think it clicked in
his head

at that point that Bob rode
motorcycles, as well.

And then he just lost it.

And he grabbed me and drug me
across the house.

You really are
a piece of garbage.

Shoved the phone in my hand
and said, "You call him

right now.
I want to talk to him."

Call him!

Call him now!

So I called Bob up,
Wayne got on the phone,

and instead of yelling
or cussing at him,

he was very pleasant.

He said,
"Why don't you come,

and we can all go out
to breakfast?"

He was so calm

and so, you know,
matter-of-fact.

It did frighten me,
because I didn't know

what he was planning.

That was a behavior that
wasn't normal for him,

and it was very scary.

See you soon.

When Wayne
hung up the phone,

he reverted back
to his normal angry self

and said that he might as well
use me one more time.

And then he r*ped me.

No! No! Get off!

And then, you know,
when he was done,

he told me to get dressed,

and then we drove
to the restaurant.

When we were in
the restaurant,

I was pretty much
an emotional wreck.

I didn't know
what he would do.

I was scared for Bob.

I was scared for myself.

Great, Bob,
you made it.

I think Bob
knew when he saw me

and the look on my face
and in my eyes,

something had happened.

I just wanted to tell you,

we've decided to split up.

Wayne was
very cordial with Bob.

He reverted to
that personality that

he had with Bob on the phone.

He was just chatting with Bob
like he was a new friend.

It was just, um, bizarre.

You know,
now that I'm on the market,

maybe you can help me out.

And then he actually
asked Bob if, um,

he knew any girls
with big boobs

that he could introduce
him to.

You know the type
I'm talking about.

He was kind of belittling me
in front of Bob

and, you know, feeling like

any big boob girl
could replace me.

It was said in such a friendly
manner that it was bizarre.

Bob was, like, taken aback.

And Bob just said,
"Go home, pack a bag.

I'll be there
to pick you up."

Don't worry.

I'll come for you.

I left the restaurant
in our car.

I went home
and packed stuff to leave.

Wayne walked,
and Bob got in his car

and came and picked me up,
and we were gone

by the time that Wayne
got home.

Shortly after that, Bob and I
were living together.

A relationship was blossoming
between the two of us,

and I felt safe for the first
time in a long time.

It was just like
a release of tension

that I could finally
breathe again.

But I knew in my heart
and in my brain

that this wasn't
the end of it.

I started to get
phone calls at work

from Wayne.

And he would tell me

everything I had done
from the moment

that I left work
the day before.

Every turn I made, every,
you know, grocery store

I stopped at...
It was very specific.

You kissed at a parking lot.
You had dinner at this place.

And he would do this daily

just to... to let me know
that he was watching me.

And then that kind of
escalated into

me coming out to my car.

He had written
on the dust in my car,

"I see you."

I knew that he was angry.

He hadn't gotten
the opportunity

to properly punish me.

My stomach was in knots,
waiting, wondering.

I was constantly
on my guard.

It was like he was
a shadow that was there,

constantly, just continuing
to terrorize me.

I still felt like something
could happen at any moment,

and I ended up being right.

When I was finally able
to get the money to file

for divorce,
I needed to get

out of there,
because something was going

to happen if I didn't
protect myself.

I quit my job, and we moved
down to Palm Springs.

We didn't really tell anybody.

My family knew where we were,
but they also knew that they

weren't gonna go tell Wayne,

so we were kind of
trying to hide.

But somehow Wayne
had found out.

I looked across the street,
and I saw Wayne,

and I just, I said, "We gotta
get out of here now.

We've gotta go home."

This is how scary it was
because of how determined

he was...
During the period of time

when Wayne was stalking me,

there really were
no stalking laws.

You can't go to the police and
say someone's being mean to me.

They're not gonna do anything.

So Bob and I actually moved
even further out of the city.

We were hiding.
We spent two years hiding,

just in case he would find us.

I knew that he was always
lurking out there.

I never...

never...

felt safe.

He dropped off my radar.

There was no further contacts.

Life had moved on.
Bob and I had gotten married.

I had my first child.

Um, so life was happening.

In November of '97,

I get a phone call,
and my sister is on the phone,

and she said,

"Turn on your TV,
and turn to Channel Four."

And she's on the phone going,

"Is that Wayne?
Is that him?"

And then they started telling
the story about that

he had turned himself in.

Investigators say that


handed them a plastic bag
containing

a severed breast and then
confessed to murdering

four women over
the last 14 months.

When I heard about
the... the severed breast,

obviously, there was flashbacks
to the breast bondage

and the wax molds,
and it made perfect sense.

It was what he wanted.

It was what he was after,

and it was what
he would want to keep.

It was his trophy.

Ford has so far
admitted to k*lling

an unidentified woman
whose torso was found

in this slough in Eureka,

Patricia Ann Tamez
in Southern California,

and Lanett White
near Stockton.

The minute that you hear
something like that,

you immediately think, "Oh,
my God, that could've been me."

I actually contacted the
Humboldt sheriff's department,

and I really started
to get the details.

He ended up being
a truck driver.

He was, you know, traveling
around in his truck,

and he'd go to
one county,

pick up a girl here.

Leave her body some place,
go over to another county,

stop at another truck stop.

In his trailer,
where he had been living,

they had found rendered fat
in, like, a coffee can.

Pieces in the freezer,
next to the ice cream.

In essence,
that was what he was

doing when he made
those wax molds.

He was making
a disembodied breast.

He could have stopped
after the first one,

but he didn't.

He kept doing it.

He kept going out
and picking up other girls.

When Wayne went to trial,

the charges were serial m*rder

of four victims.

Even though
he'd confessed everything,

he ended up pleading
not guilty.

That's Wayne in court.

That's what I remember seeing
when... when I was in

the courtroom...
It was terrifying.

It was honestly terrifying,
because in my head,

all these years, I, you know,

was still always afraid
he was trying to find me.

And he was, you know,
and basically here I was serving

myself up on a silver platter...
For all those years,

the fear was always there
that he was out there.

The female bailiff could see
how nervous I was, and, um,

she just, you know, kind of
tried to reassure me.

She said, "Don't worry, honey.

If he moves, I'll sh**t him."

Made me feel a little
bit better.

This is not the person
that I married.

It's an ugly version
of the person that

I married... the last time
I seen him,

he still looked like a Marine.

I never envisioned
the downward spiral

that he headed down
after our divorce.

It's a scary picture.

I definitely feel
with the severity

of the crimes
that he committed,

you don't want someone
like that

out and in the world.

And to be perfectly honest
with you, in my view,

there is no redemption
for someone like that.

He took four lives.

He took them violently
and ruthlessly.

I don't feel a ton
of empathy for him.

He's gone,
and that's fine.

But I personally still carry

a lot of guilt.

There was a period of
time where...

I felt could I have changed
him, had I done this,

had I known that, but it's not
my responsibility.

I would hope that

what I've said
and what I'm saying

might reach a woman in
a similar situation...

and...

hopefully spur her
to get help to get out.

This is not the way that
you're supposed to be treated.

This is not the way that life
is supposed to go.