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02x19 - Apprentice Appreciation Day/The Grape Worm

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Chowder". Aired: November 2, 2007 – August 7, 2010.*
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The series revolves around the titular Chowder, who works as an apprentice to chef Mung Daal at his catering company.

02x19 - Apprentice Appreciation Day/The Grape Worm

Post by bunniefuu »

Mung daal: ♪ you take the

Moon, and you take the sun ♪

Chowder: ♪ you take

Everything that seems like fun ♪

Truffles: ♪ you stir it all

Up, and when you're done ♪

Shnitzel: ♪ radda radda radda

R-r-radda radda ♪

All: ♪ so, come on in

♪ Feel free to do some looking

♪ Stay awhile 'cause something's

Always cooking ♪

♪ Come on in

♪ Feel free to do some looking

♪ Stay awhile 'cause something's

Always cooking ♪

Yeah!

[ Applause ]

Chowder: [ snoring ]

All: happy apprentice

Appreciation day, chowder!

Chowder: [ gasps ]

Mung daal: do you know what

That means?!

Both: slobberry ca-a-a-a-ke!

Chowder: [ shudders ]

Slobberry cake!

How I love your moist, cakey

Goodness.

Who can resist that rich, thick,

Slobberry topping, drenched all

Over those sweet, plump

Slobberries just begging to be

Eaten?

All: eat us! Come on! Do it!

Mung daal: and in honor of

Today, we have written a poem

Just for you.

"Chowder, oh, chowder, we

Appreciate you.

chowder -- like baking powder,

Or a loud, screeching sound that

Gets louder and louder!"

[ Chuckles ]

Truffles: "like batteries

Maxed out to their full power,

Or is it lemons that are really

Sour?

Or a princess locked away in a

Tower, with no shower?"

Schnitzel: "radda radda radda

Radda radda.

Radda radda radda radda radda."

All: "we appreciate you,

Chowder!"

Chowder: wow! Poetry!

Mung daal: well, I'm glad you

Liked it.

Now let's all jet over to the

Farmer's market.

[ Engine ignites ]

[ Blast! ]

[ Party horns blare ]

Chowder: slobberry cake!

Slobberry cake!

Eat so much, you get bellyache!

Mung daal: yo, gazpacho, my

Man, hit me up with your finest

Slobberries, a.s.a.p.

Slobberries, huh?

Ooh, looks like it's somebody's

Special day today.

There you go, little buddy.

Chowder: thanks, gazpacho.

What is it?

It is a babe magnet!

Never really worked for me, so

I'm giving it to you.

Not -- not that I ever needed it

Or anything, you know, 'cause,

Uh, old gazpacho sees, uh...

[ Chuckles ]

...pa-lenty of action.

[ shouting, explosions ]

Chowder: gee, thanks!

[ Whir! ]

Panini: hi, numnums.

Chowder: I'm not your

Boyfriend!

Gazpacho, this is the worst gift

Ever!

Whoa! It actually works?!

No way! Kid, lemme try!

Supermodel! Supermodel!

Come on, supermodel!

[ Whir! ]

Ahem!

Yes!

[ Squeak! Squeak! ]

Oh, my.

Hello, peasants!

I'm here just to let you know

That I'm putting on an exclusive

Soiree for my apprentice, and

None of you are invited.

[ Laughs ]

Panini: but you can come if

You want, chowder.

Chowder: um, I'll have to

Check my schedule.

My days are pretty packed with

Avoiding you.

Hey, w-what about me, huh?

I'd be happy -- am I invited?

Huh?! Yeah?!

Dance and stuff.

I bet I am, right?

No.

Mung daal: oh, yeah, endive?

Well, we're also having a party

Of our own for chowder.

It'll be twice as big and twice

As awesomer as yo-o-o-o-urs!

[ Sloop! ]

Chowder: yeah, and there's

Gonna be slobberry cake, too!

[ Laughs ]

[ Snorts ]

Slobberry cake?!

Slobberry cake?!

You must really appreciate that

Boy, mung.

If you're going to serve him

That slop, you might as well let

Him eat manu-u-u-re!

Manu-u-u-u-u-u-re!

Chowder: [ gasps ]

I get to eat manure, too?!

Well, it's obvious who cares

More about their apprentice.

Have fun at your, uh, party.

[ Chuckles ]

Chowder: oh, we will!

We will!

Right, mung?

Mung daal: yeah.

Yeah. I guess.

Manu-u-u-u-u-u-re!

[ Party horns blare ]

Chowder: whoa, what's all the

Hoopla for, mung?

Mung daal: this year, I'm

Going big with a food-animal

Circus.

We've got pork-loin tamers...

[ Roars ]

[ Whip cracks ]

Mung daal: ...lemon

Merenguetans...

[ Grunts ]

Mung daal: ...candy-coated

Snelephants, magic shows...

Okay, okay, okay.

I got it! I got it!

Your card is the 15 of clubs!

No.

The 32 of diamonds!

No.

The 57 of hearts?

No.

[ Grunts ]

[ Shuffle! ]

Magic!

Mung daal: ...freak shows...

Truffles: yes, very funny.

Now prepare to die!

[ Roar! ]

Mung daal: now everyone in

The world will know how much I

Appreciate you.

Schnitzel: radda.

Radda radda radda radda radda?

Mung daal: oh, right.

The ice sculpture.

Uh, put it in the foyer.

Schnitzel: radda radda radda

Radda!

Mung daal: then build a foyer

To put it in!

Chowder: so, when do I get my

Slobberry cake, mung?!

Mung daal: slobberry cake?!

Uh, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Simple, boring slobberry cake

Isn't gonna work this time.

You deserve the best.

Chowder: but I like slobberry

Cake.

Mung daal: no!

You are way too special for

That.

Chowder: no, I'm not!

I promise!

Mung daal: yes, you are.

Chowder: no, I'm not!

Mung daal: yes, you are!

Not everyone has got their own

Weird show named after them.

Chowder: yeah, well, that's

True.

This show is weird.

Mung daal: now, please,

Chowder, I've got to finish

Ordering schnitzel around.

Schnitzel? You there?

Where are my swans? Over.

I specifically asked for 5,000

Swans to be here an hour ago!

Over.

Look, this is chowder's party,

And I can't let him down!

Over.

Schnitzel: radda radda radda!

Radda radda radda radda!

Over.

Mung daal: sold out?!

What do you mean they're sold

Out?!

who would buy 5,000 swans?!

Over.

Tell mommy you love her!

[ Swans squawking ]

Panini: ow!

They're hurting me!

Yes, yes.

Everything is arranged, panini.

People will be talking about

Your party for centuries!

Panini: honestly, I'll be

Happy as long as my

Snugglebumpkin schnookamookums

Is there.

What on earth is

Snugglebumpkin schnookamookums?

Panini: chowder!

Chowder?!

Oh! You can't be serious!

[ Chuckles ]

Are you serious?

Panini: yes.

You can't be serious!

That boy is so...dirty!

You're much too good for him.

That is why I invited carson.

Greetings.

Carson is captain of both the

Water-polo team and the lacrosse

Team.

And not to mention he has an mba

From schminceton.

He'll make a fine suitor, don't

You think?

Panini: but I don't like

Carson!

He's too realistic-looking!

I want chowder!

Whoa. Bummer.

Look, panini, I don't have

Time for one of your moods right

Now.

Panini: fine, then.

I'm going for a walk.

Uh, so who's down for some

Wakeboarding?

Chowder: you know, kimchi, I

Thought today was supposed to be

A really fun day, but, nah.

Instead, I get that guy.

Happy apprentice appreciation

Day!

Happy! Happy! Happy!

Happy! Happy! Happy!

Panini: chowder, is that you?

[ Purrs ]

[ Blabbers ]

[ Slam! ]

Panini: so, what are you

Doing out here by the docks?

Chowder: nothing.

Just feeding bread crumbs to

Little old ladies.

All: [ screaming ]

Chowder: by the way, I'm not

Your boyfriend.

Panini: what's wrong,

Chowder?

You seem down.

Chowder: oh, it's mung.

He won't listen to me.

I don't need a big, elaborate

Party.

I'm not a big-party kind of guy.

I mean, it takes me hours to get

Ready.

I haven't gotten my nails done

Or my hair did, and not to

Mention I don't even have a nice

c*ck dress to wear.

Something strapless would have

Been nice.

I just want slobberry cake.

Panini: all I wanted was for

You to come to my party.

But endive said you were too

Dirty.

Chowder: why would she say

That?

Panini: neither of us really

Got what we wanted.

Maybe we're not that special,

After all.

Chowder: [ sighs ]

We both could use some serious

Cheering up.

Happy apprentice apprecia--

Chowder: not by you!

Mung daal: no, no, no, no.

You're doing it all wrong.

Let me show you.

It goes like this.

[ Whoosh! Whoosh! ]

[ Boing! Boing! ]

[ Whirl! ]

[ Sloop! ]

[ Clang! ]

[ Whirl! ]

Truffles: what's going on in

Here?!

And why am I always catching you

In tights?!

Mung daal: I'm just showing

The dancers the routine for the

Big stage show I'm putting on

For chowder.

It's called "chowder!"

By the way, where is he?

We need him for the finale.

Truffles: that's what I came

To tell you!

He's gone missing!

I checked the bathroom, the

Kitchen, the bedroom, the

Bathroom, the garden, the

Bathroom, the attic, the

Bathroom, the basement, the

Bathroom --

Mung daal: wait, wait, wait,

Wait, wait!

Did you check the bathroom?

Truffles: yes!

And he isn't in there!

He isn't in there!

Mung daal: then let's find

Our boy!

Oh, wait! Here he is!

Hello, papa.

Truffles: that's not chowder.

Mung daal: oh, yeah.

You lied to me!

Let's find chowder!

Chowder?! Where are you?!

We've been searching for hours,

And there's been no sign of him.

Truffles: wait. There's one.

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la,

La ♪

Mung daal: is he a friend of

Yours, schnitzel?

Schnitzel: radda...

Radda.

Mung daal: oh, w-wait a

Minute!

I forgot!

Just in case something like this

Happened, I had him bugged!

He's over here!

Yo! I found him!

Mung daal: chowder, there you

Are!

[ Gasps ]

You had us all worried!

Look, I'm sorry!

It's just I got so dang excited

About giving you the best

Apprentice appreciation day ever

That I forgot the most important

Thing, and that's you, the

Apprentice!

Truffles: that's not chowder!

Hello, papa!

Chowder: [ sniffles ]

That was so sweet!

Sweet like candy.

Panini: chowder, are you

Crying?

Chowder: no! Only girls cry!

Men weep!

I realize now that I don't need

Cake to feel appreciated, even

Though that would be, like, so

Awesome!

I've got you guys.

Mung daal: that's too bad,

Chowder, 'cause I guess now...

this will have to go to waste!

Truffles: oh, great, you got

Chest hair all over the cake!

Chowder: [ gasps ]

Slobberry cake!

You were listening to me this

Whole time!

Mung daal: yeah, well, maybe

Just a little bit.

[ Vacuum whir! ]

Chowder: this is the best

Apprentice appreciation day

Ever!

Panini: how's your cake?

Chowder: here, try some.

Blech!

There you go.

[ Rumble! ]

Truffles: it's the big one!

Panini, I've been looking

Everywhere for -- aah!

[ All gasp ]

That's it, panini!

We're heading home this instant!

We have guests waiting at your

Party.

Panini: no, I'm not going

Unless chowder goes!

You said he couldn't go because

He was dirty.

Now he's clean.

Chowder: [ sniffs ]

Fine!

I can come too, right?

I mean, huh? Can i?

That's cool, right?

Panini: yay!

This is the best apprentice

Appreciation day ever!

Mwah!

Chowder: aah! No! Stop!

Gross! Gross! Gross!

Mung daal: well, chowder, I

Guess you can't have your cake

And eat it, too!

[ All laugh ]

Chowder: wait.

What's so funny?

Mung daal: chowder, my boy,

Today is a very proud day for

Me.

Today you take your first step

Toward manhood by becoming a

Seasoned grape picker.

I remember my first days

Grabbing grapes.

Behold, old sadie,

Marzipan city's oldest grape

Vine.

Chowder: golly, it's taller

Than shnitzel, and he's tall!

Mung daal: yes. Yes, he is.

Old sadie here has such

High-quality grapes that, when

Held to the light, they reveal a

Perfect balance of the beauty

And -- worms?!

[ Gags ]

That filthy shrub has worms!

Worms!

[ Chatter! ]

Nobody go near it!

[ Whoosh! ]

[ Gulp! ]

[ Burps loudly ]

Mung daal: chowder, what have

You done?!

Stay -- stay with me, boy!

Stay with me!

[ Rattle! ]

Chowder: why are you freaking

Out, mung?

I feel fi--

[ Rumbling! ]

[ Grunting ]

Aah!

[ Grunts ]

[ Both scream ]

[ Thud! ]

Mung daal: chowder, you've

Given yourself a grape worm!

Oh, gosh!

You ate the grape, and I grew so

Fast inside you, and I came out,

And ugh!

Chowder: did I just have a

Baby?

Oh, that is rude!

No, I'm not a baby!

Chowder: are you a hernia?

No! Can't be a hernia!

That's crazy!

Chowder: then you must be my

Inner voice.

What?

Mung daal: uh, we got to go

To the doctors right away and

Get that thing out of you.

I hear they make you sit on

Potty paper and that their

Hands, they smell like pastrami.

No, thank you!

Chowder: you know, mung,

Something is telling me not to

Go to the doctor.

Mung daal: yeah.

It's that worm!

Chowder: no, it's as if a

Small voice inside of me is

Saying, "it's a bad idea."

I can almost hear it right now.

[ Farts ]

Oh, gosh! What was that?!

Chowder: my inner voice is

Worried, mung, and if there's

One thing you've taught me, it's

To trust my inner voice.

[ Giggling ]

My inner voice tickles my

Spleen.

Don't run so fast!

Chowder: hey, mung.

Mung daal: is the worm gone?

Chowder: I don't know nothing

About no worm, but I took your

Advice and went to the doctor.

Mung daal: oh, thank heavens.

Chowder: see?

Dr. Photography's one-hour

Dramatic family portrait office.

Oh, no way.

You see, somebody should take

Away their license because they

Do not know what they are doing.

They take pictures from the bad

Side.

Everybody knows that...

Mung daal: get that thing out

Of my kitchen!

I run a sanitary shop, kiddo!

Shnitzel: radda-choo!

Mung daal: not helping,

Shnitzel.

Chowder: mung, my inner voice

Is a part of me, a part named

Jam, and if you don't accept

Jam, well, then, I guess you

Don't really accept me.

Accept me for me, mung, jam and

All.

Accept me!

Mung daal: [ grunting ]

What you looking at?

Mung daal: okay. Fine.

Chowder: [ giggles ]

Mung daal: you can help me

Finish making this gabbles

Gravy.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, well...

You better not get me

Started, 'cause I'll smack --

I-i swear, I will do something

Crazy.

[ Sighs ]

It's like all they know how to

Do is complain!

Mnh-mnh-mnh!

Mung daal: chowder, if that

Thing's gonna be in my kitchen,

It's gonna have to stay quiet

While you and I cook.

Chowder: shush, jam.

Shush, now.

Mung daal: we add two eggs.

Oh, no, he didn't!

He just dropped two eggs right

In there!

Eggs fall from the rear ends of

Overweight poultry!

Mung daal: quiet, you!

Oh, get that spoon out of my

Face!

Mung daal: hey, chowder,

Could you pass me the salt,

Behind you?

Did you --

Mung daal: [ growls ]

[ Warble! ]

Chowder: one salt coming

Right up!

[ Zip! ]

[ Whispering ]

Chowder: I'm sorry, mung.

Jam doesn't think it's a good

Idea.

Mung daal: oh.

Let's just skip ahead.

I need you to...

[ Whispering ]

Speak up so I can hear you!

Mung daal: [ smooch! ]

Aah! Aah! Ooh!

And by the way, your friend

Kissed me, and then he ran away.

Chowder: eh, he's just shy.

Don't worry, jam.

Mung may not like you, but

Gazpacho will!

He likes everyone!

What a polite young man to

Add two pieces of fruit at no

Charge.

I guess. Thank you.

Come -- come again!

Don't get excited.

That was an accident, but

Congratulations, you old bag.

You're now dead to me.

Chowder: hey, gazpacho!

What?

He-- oh, hey, little buddy!

Ew, I smell wet fur.

Aah!

Chowder: gazpacho, meet jam.

He's my inner voice.

Hush!

Oh, gosh! He got no fingers!

Get that thing out of here

Before you scare all my

Customers away!

Customers?

Oh, this covers my fears of

Strangers, crowds, and shoppers!

It's a triple threat!

Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah! Aah!

Gazpacho's got a grape worm

At a fruit stand!

Dirty fruit! Dirty fruit!

Yes, and he made this baby

Cry!

Now you've done it!

Get him!

Chowder, I know you didn't

Mean to, but you just ruined my

Career!

Doomsday has arrived!

[ Buzz! ]

[ Air hisses ]

[ Indistinct shouting ]

Chowder, until you get rid of

That worm, you will burn bridges

In the world -- burn bridges!

Oh, no, you are better off

Without him, girl.

That guy was dangerous, and I

Could -- I could tell by his

Eyes, lifeless eyes, like a

Doll's eyes.

Chowder: [ sighs ]

[ Pop! ]

[ Plop! ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Pop! Ding! ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Pop! ]

All those excess carbs are

Gonna go right to your butt.

[ Sloop! ]

[ Warble! ]

[ Sighs ]

Now that's more like it.

Hey, chowder, be a sweetheart,

And turn up my humidifier, would

You?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Slow down there, ninja hands!

Oh, that's just something

Wonderful.

Chowder: jam, I --

Aah, what did I tell you

About talking?!

You breathe germs when you talk!

[ Gags ]

Gosh, you scared the retainer

Right out of my mouth!

Chowder: but, jam, I got to,

You know, make, well, a poo.

That's the worst thing you

Have ever said to me.

I would like an apology.

Chowder: but I got to go!

Oh, heavens no!

You should know better than

That!

Who raised you?

Two boys can't go to the potty

Together at the same time!

You got to get used to it

Because you can't poo ever

Again!

Ever again!

Ever again.

Ever again.

Chowder: jam, since you're my

Inner voice, I respect you and

All, but you don't let me eat

Anything, you've made all my

Friends avoid me, and you won't

Let me poo!

Maybe it'd be better if we

Separated for a while?

Oh, chowder, look, I know

You're an abomination --

Everyone does -- but I forgive

You, and I am willing to change

You.

Not like a baby, but I'm willing

To change you because you are

Very lucky to have me here,

Chowder, especially with all

Those high risk factors you put

Me through.

Night, night.

It's time to go inside your

Belly.

Chowder: [ weeps ]

How am I supposed to live my

Life when my inner voice thinks

Everything I do is too

Dangerous?

"Too dangerous"!

That's it!

Where the -- where are we?

This is not the fabric store.

Chowder: nope.

It's somewhere better.

A ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba!

Whoa, we are at the foothills,

Where grapes get stomped into

Juice.

Did you know that?

Did you know that?

[ Mid-tempo music plays ]

Chowder: wow!

That sounds...dangerous!

Like so dangerous you'd want to

Leave my body?

[ Tempo increases ]

Uh, chowder, why is the music

Sounding like it's gonna get all

Energetic?

[ Whoosh! ]

[ Both screaming ]

Chowder: I'm going!

It's the...only way!

[ Squish! ]

[ Screams ]

Look out!

Chowder: it's okay!

You can leave now!

Watch ahead! Hold my arm!

Chowder: this wasn't a great

Idea at all!

We're gonna die!

Why didn't you talk me out of

This?!

'Cause I didn't know about

It!

[ Both scream ]

That's it!

You're a crazy person!

[ Boing! ]

[ Sproing! ]

Chowder: he's gone!

I'm free! I'm free!

I'm free! I'm free!

[ Gasps ]

[ Screaming ]

[ Boing! Boing! Boing! Boing! ]

Chowder: hang on, jam!

[ Screaming ]

Chowder: n-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!

Go on, jam! Run!

I don't want to die!

[ Crack! ]

Chowder!

Chowder, what has gotten into

You?!

Chowder: I think it's more

About what just came out of me.

Jam, you are my inner voice, and

While I respect you, we're just

Two different people.

I'm a little bit country.

And I'm a little bit rock 'n'

Roll, chowder.

Look, I now see that after all

This trouble that you went

Through that you are a

Psychopath!

Shush, child!

Don't make this harder than it

Already is for us.

And I truly believe that there

Is a worm out there who will

Appreciate you as much as I

Have.

Oh, my gosh! What was that?!

Did you see that?!

Everything was, like, dark!

It was a giant me, but, like,

See-through!

Anyways, we both move too fast,

Too soon.

Let's just be happy we didn't

Get to a point where we --

Chowder: finish each other's

Sentences.

Oh, chowder.

You'll always have a small piece

Of me inside of your heart.

Chowder: I know, jam.

No, for real, because I laid

Eggs.

Now, come on.

Send me off on the next autumn

Gust and never look back!

[ Wind gusts ]

Bye-bye, chowder!

Goodbye!

Whee!

Chowder: jam, I know you'll

Find a better place.

Oh, no. Not you.

Not you!

Get -- get off of me!

Aah! You!

[ Crying ] get out of me!

Halt!

No one shall enter the castle

Without the password!

Ah! 'Tis mayonnaise!

Wrong!

It isn't?

How about gordikio?

[ Buzz! ]

Thumbs?

Carburetor?

Blungenflute?

Aw, man! I can't remember!

Can't you just let me through?

Mother always says, "people

Have passwords for a reason --

To keep the freeloaders out."

Well, do you know the

Password?

Sure do.

It is corsage.

Corsage!

[ Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! ]

Eh, you...

Fine. Come through.

[ Hooves clacking! ]

[ Neigh! ]