12x18 - Call Me Dimitri

[bunniefuu]

[narrator] Previously, on Knots Landing...

Will you tell the court where Jason Lochner is staying?

No.

[judge] Then I have no choice,

but to hold you in contempt of court.

-Bailiff. -[gavel bangs]

[grunts]

[gasps]

-[Jason] Let her go! -Jason!

-[Paige] Let go! -Now, let's get out of here.

-[Jason] Get out of here! -I'm taking you home.

[Steve] I'm the kid you never expected.

I'm the son you gave away.

Dear, dear.

You are Betty.

Call me Dimitri.

Betty!

Dimitri!

Oh!

[theme music playing]

[music continues]

[music continues]

-Nick, why are you-- -Dimitri.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Lovely hotel. -Thank you.

Hope you're enjoying your stay with us.

Yes, we are. Aren't we, Betty?

Yes, Dimitri.

-Bye. -Bye-bye.

[whispering harshly] Nick, what are you doing?

[whispering] You must trust me.

[romantic music]

Alright.

[sighs]

Anna.

Listen to me.

There's something I want to tell you.

[Anne] Come here.

Anna. Listen to me. Anna! Anna!

[Anne screams]

[Nick] Shh!

Come down, Anna!

[screams] You bit me!

Not hard enough.

What do you mean? I'm bleeding!

[Nick sighs]

There's a dead woman in your bed, Nick.

Dimitri.

[whispering harshly] Quit saying that!

-Did you k*ll her? -Of course not.

Then why is she dead?

[Nick] It was an act of God.

[Nick] Like meeting you.

Yeah, well, I'll... I'll... I'll say a prayer for her.

Please. Wait.

-I'll get you a drink. -I don't want a drink.

Room service? Hello.

Yes, I'd like your martini,

up, extra dry, with a twist.

Oh, and Betty.

Betty, what would you like?

Okay. Make that two Martinis.

Thank you.

Betty?

Her name is Betty?

[lock buzzes]

You are out here, MacKenzie.

-Oh, my lucky day. -No.

My lucky day.

-Ah! -Hey.

[Karen] Happy Valentine's Day.

What happened?

The judge reduced your sentence--

Yeah, I know, a $2500 fine.

I mean, what happened to Jason?

He came out of hiding.

What? Where is he?

Home with his father.

Damn it.

And here's a number you can call anytime,

day or night.

Keep it with you, or memorize it.

Okay, Jason?

Your first session with the family counseling service

is scheduled for tomorrow at 4:30.

Can both of you make it?

Yes.

Yeah.

Okay.

Bye.

Goodbye.

Thank you.

What's this?

Reading material.

Now that it's just the two of us...

I want you to know

that I intend to make a real effort

to go forward as a family.

I'm not interested in looking back.

I'm not interested in laying blame.

As far as I'm concerned, none of this ever happened.

We're going to

start fresh.

Clean slate.

[emotional music playing]

Marco fired me for losing the $1,000,000.

What was I supposed to do?

But traveling with a woman for her money?

Ah! Exactly. Why did you travel with Marco?

At least he was cute.

Betty looked much better before she turned blue.

Oh, Nick.

You must quit calling me Nick.

My real name is Dimitri.

You lied to me about your name?

You said you were being blackmailed.

I was sent to k*ll the blackmailer.

If I had to k*ll someone,

you could have told the police my real name.

So you are a k*ller.

-Maybe you did k*ll Betty. -I did not.

It was a heart attack.

What is your real name?

-Dimitri Papas. -That's Greek.

You're Italian.

My ancestors were Greek.

Let me see your passport.

Betty hired me to come with her to this country

to the funeral of a second cousin,

because she didn't speak any English.

That and other things.

Anna, we just met.

Nothing happened between us.

Yeah, and your name is Nick.

Why don't you just call her family

and tell them that she's dead?

Because she came to this country

to the funeral of a second cousin

to get a memento.

And I want to get it for her.

Well, how are you going to do that?

She is dead.

Her relatives know I'm traveling with her.

I just have to go to the funeral to get it.

You're babysitting a corpse so that you can go to a funeral?

Yes.

Why?

Because Betty said the memento was worth something.

-How much? -$20,000.

Italian dollars or American dollars?

[Nick] To Betty, may you rest in peace.

[speaks foreign language]

Nick, I mean, Dimitri,

why don't we call the coroner?

I mean, her family doesn't have to know.

Anna, there would be so many questions.

Can't we at least move her to another room?

And have the maid find her?

Not in front of Betty.

-[Kate] Did Steve call? -Yes.

So, is he going to drop off copies of the pictures?

No.

Mom, what's the matter with you?

Katey.

Sit down here, would you, please?

When I was very young,

I got into... trouble.

What kind of trouble?

No, it's... it's a euphemism

we used to use to refer to...

unwed mothers.

I was very young.

I got pregnant, I had a child,

and I gave the child up for adoption.

Why didn't you tell me?

I never thought it would come up.

I don't care. You still should have told me.

No, I don't, I don't think it would have been fair to you.

-Did Dad know? -No.

-So he wasn't the father. -No. No, look, Katey.

I gave the child up

so it could be raised by a good family

that could provide for him.

And they did that.

He's had a very good life.

Do you know him?

It's Steve.

See, he didn't come here to take pictures

or to do an article.

He wanted to get to me.

Why, after all these years,

didn't you tell me this?

-I didn't want to upset you. -It wouldn't have upset me.

You're upset now.

Because you waited till now to tell me.

[Claudia] You weren't even born when this happened.

That doesn't matter.

I don't ask about your private life.

Oh yes, you do. You do ask all the time.

[Claudia] Katie. I love you.

But I don't want to go into this.

No, you never would have told me any of this

if he hadn't shown up.

No, probably not.

And how did Steve feel about all of this?

[Claudia] He wants more information.

But I don't think it would be fair to a lot of people

for me to give that.

So, the kind of thing that we can do right now

is to let everyone live their lives in peace

without any more interference.

[sniffling] I gotta go practice.

[slams door]

Are you okay?

Why do you ask?

You're so quiet.

I'm a little self-conscious, I guess.

Like I'm living inside a courtroom,

where anything I say can and will be used against me.

-Dad. -Dad, Dad.

Do you know how my colleagues look at me?

Or my secretary?

Not to mention that I lost the Jameson account

that I've had for eight years.

And nobody's going to convince me

that it's not because

because of rumors and innuendo.

[sighs]

How about those Lakers, huh?

[Karen] "You think you know everything.

"You think you're smarter than other parents.

"Well, I'm here to tell you, Mr. McKinley...

[Mack chuckles]

Somebody mad enough to write

would learn how to spell my name.

"But the problem with kids these days

"is that they don't get punished enough.

My parents knew how to discipline a child."

I never figured out why people think

that hitting is discipline.

Sounds better.

-Are all the letters like that? -No.

"My parents hit me from as far back as I could remember,

"until I hit them back when I was 17.

"I think what you did for that boy

"was the finest thing I ever saw an adult do.

Please take this contribution."

Twenty dollars.

"To help Jason stay away from his father."

You know that jerk's brothers attacked my daughter,

and now he's got Jason back home?

I'm going over there.

He needs to know

he's being watched.

He needs to be held accountable.

He needs to know

if anything happens to that kid--

[doorbell dings]

-Marion Patrick MacKenzie? -Yeah.

Did something happened to Jason?

Here.

"Remain at all times not less than 200 yards

"from the Lochner domicile.

"Refrain from all contact

"with Richard and Jason Lochner.

"Any attempt to contact Richard or Jason Lochner,

"including telephone calls and letters,

will be in violation of this order."

[sighs]

Anna. Nobody knows what she looks like.

She might have sent them a picture.

-You don't look that different. -Oh, thanks.

We'll just say you bleach your hair

because you're going grey.

I am not going grey.

What are you doing?

You need to be in black.

You can't go in what you're wearing.

I'm not going at all.

-Think of the money. -[Anne] No!

Sixty-thousand dollars.

I thought you said it was twenty.

I was planning on a twenty-forty split.

Fifty-fifty.

Then you'll go?

No.

What am I supposed to tell them?

Tell them that I'm sick!

Tell them she is sick.

You're making this much more difficult for me.

Well, I'm the one who has to stay with a body.

And don't let anyone in.

[Anne chuckles]

Good advice, Dimitri.

[door closes]

[dialing number]

I want a dry martini, straight up.

Very dry.

Very cold.

Make that a double.

[Val] Oh!

Cool!

[Betsy] Give me the glue.

[Val] What are you writing?

"I love you, Daddy."

-These are for Daddy, huh? -Yup.

You love your daddy, don't you?

Yeah.

You know,

sometimes people can see really nice,

when they're not.

That's why you never talk to strangers.

That's right.

Even if they seem nice,

they might be lying.

Sometimes your daddy lies.

-No, he doesn't. -Yes, he does.

What does he lie about?

Did he tell you that I was sick?

-[both] Yes. -Well, I'm not.

But you said, too.

I had to tell you that to fool Daddy.

Why would you want to fool Daddy?

Because he wants to steal you from me.

-No, he doesn't. -Yes, he does.

He wants you to forget that you ever even had a mommy.

How can we forget that we have a mommy?

Because if Daddy gets his way,

you're going to forget all about me.

And I won't let that happen. Now give me your hands.

You can't tell him that I told you this.

Because if you do,

he'll take you away,

and we'll never see each other again.

[psychiatrist] We could use a 5150 to take her.

After the initial hospitalisation,

we can file initiation papers

stating there is sufficient cause

for a 14-day detainment.

If she still doesn't respond to treatment,

you can press for conservatorship.

Excuse me.

I'm looking for Paige. Have you seen her?

[all] No, Sir.

If she comes in, would you send her in right away?

Yes, sir.

She must have a good excuse.

Well, whatever it is,

I certainly wouldn't know.

[whistling]

[Linda] What?

Well, it's only a rumor,

and you didn't hear it from me,

but it's reliable.

She got beat up.

I swear. Somebody punched her out.

-Not hard enough. -[both chuckle]

Mort. A terrible thing to say.

Kinda true.

I'm sorry.

Well Mack, it's not your fault.

I have an idealist for a father,

and daughters of idealists should learn to duck faster.

I'm so sorry.

-[Paige] Ow! Mack! -[Mack] Ouch.

It looks like a kind and loving man.

He was a maniac who beat his wife.

-Sorry. -She deserved it.

She fornicated with his nephew.

His nephew took her in.

Then that scum threw her out in the street.

Perhaps we should not speak ill of the dead.

And how sick is Betty?

Terrible.

She can't breathe. She's coughing.

Oh, good. We'll take her some soup.

Yes, chicken soup we made.

She was sleeping when I left.

Then she would want the soup when she wakes up.

Right.

Why don't you let me take it?

-No, no, no. -Oh, no.

-We are relatives. -Yes, we are family.

-It is our place to do it. -Yes, we are family.

-We are relatives. -That's right.

That's why we must be able to take it to her.

[knocking on door]

Just a minute.

[suspenseful music]

-Who is it? -Room service.

Shall I pour these for you?

No, that's okay. I can take care of it.

[whispering] I'm sorry.

I didn't realize someone was sleeping.

Yes, Dimitri. Thank you.

[gasps]

Would you sign this please?

[playful music]

[door closes]

[sighs]

[knocking on door]

Who is it?

Happy Valentine's Day.

Who's there?

Your Valentine present.

What present?

It's our Valentine's special.

Excuse me?

This is room service.

I have a basket for you.

This is a complimentary basket

of flavored chocolates.

Raspberry orange--

Well, I sure I'll muddle through it.

Anything we can do to make your Valentine's Day special,

please just let us know.

It's been more than special.

I do not care to be disturbed the rest of the evening.

Would you mind passing that on to your staff?

Thank you.

[loud thud]

-Hi. -Hi.

-Can I help you with that? -Oh, thanks.

I found this stuff in the street.

Can you believe that?

There's some great books in there.

Somebody has the exact opposite taste

that I do.

They threw out everything I'd keep.

You can go ahead. Set that there.

Oh, I have it.

Thanks.

Umh.

Weren't you supposed to play Marcia Green tonight?

[Kate] Yeah.

But I woke up this morning an only child.

And then I found out I had a brother.

Why didn't you tell me?

I wasn't planning on telling anyone.

Well, then why'd you come here?

To see your mother,

to try to figure out a few things.

I don't know, really.

I didn't want to say anything,

then it all just came at once.

How did you find this?

My parents had kept the paperwork.

I found out after they died.

It must have been quite a shock.

Did it say who your father was?

No.

[sighs]

You know.

I thought I had this really cute guy

interested in me.

And then I found out you're my brother.

It's a very bizarre feeling.

Sorry.

So, do you have any cute friends you could fix me up with?

I don't know a soul here.

Although what good are you?

[emotional music]

Do you think we look alike?

No, you're kind of short.

My dad was short.

I don't know who your father is.

I wish I did.

I don't know a thing about you.

[emotional music]

I did that for you while I was waiting.

"Roses are a shade of red.

"My face has turned another.

"I thought you'd be my Valentine.

instead you're my brother."

[chuckles]

You better stick to tennis.

[knocking on door]

What are you doing?

Turning down the bed.

Can't you see there's somebody in it?

-I'm sorry. -Get out.

Do you want your chocolates?

A person could die of sugar shock in this hotel.

Get out!

I'm sick to death of being pampered.

Leave me alone or I'll report you

to the management.

Hi.

[chuckles] Oh, boy.

I thought you were supposed to keep a low profile.

A low profile?

No one will leave me alone.

The service to guest ratio in this hotel

is about twelve to one.

[sighs]

Is that it?

[paper crumbling]

-What is it? -Chicken soup.

Betty's relative insisted that I bring it to you.

Hey, pally, what's up?

Do you still love Mommy?

Of course I do.

Are you angry at her?

No. Why do you ask?

You yell at each other sometimes.

Well,

sometimes mommy yells because she's sick.

What kind of cold does she have?

[pats the couch] Come here.

Mommy is... sick in her mind.

And sometimes I yell back at her.

I shouldn't, but I get frustrated.

If you tell us to do one thing,

and Mommy tells us to do another,

who should we listen to?

Well, in a case like that,

we should all get together and discuss it.

What if you can't?

What's the problem, Bob?

You said we shouldn't keep secrets from you and mommy.

Unless they are little secrets, like about a birthday.

Mh-hmm. That's true, and it's very important.

But who's trying to keep a secret from us?

Would you feel more comfortable telling Mommy?

Mommy's the one who said it was a secret.

Well, I think, under the circumstances,

you can tell me.

[Val] Hi, guys.

Bobby,

I hope that you didn't tell Daddy about our secret.

I didn't.

Good.

Because it's ready now.

[Gary chuckles]

That's beautiful.

[Gary chuckles]

We thought you'd like it.

You want a taste? I want to taste.

[mimics munching]

Thanks for not ruining the surprise.

Do you mind?

I guess this means dinner isn't ready yet.

That's not a complaint,

just an observation.

Well, actually, it's cooking.

Dad, do you remember this?

-The photo? Of course. -No, this.

Am I in trouble if I don't?

Dad, remember I was in second grade?

I'm probably going to get shot for this,

but I don't remember.

Although if it's in our album,

and you're showing it to me,

you made it, right?

Yeah. Remember you brought home two boxes of candy?

One for me and one for mom.

I don't remember that.

Yeah, and Mom made cupcakes

for the whole second grade class, remember?

The cupcakes ring a bell.

You ate my client's candy.

I don't remember that.

it's coming back to me now.

I was meeting a client after dinner.

And I had an extra box from the office party.

No, mom said that was for me.

She only said that after the damage was done.

Let me tell you,

she saved you from a licking that night.

[Mr. Lochner chuckles]

No sooner did I get in the house

than you had the lid off of that box of candy

and had it half eaten.

Are you sure that was second grade?

You should have been able to spell Daddy by then.

[tense music]

Where have you been? I've been worried sick.

-It's none of your business. -It is!

It is if you're living with me.

You don't have to tell me everything.

So I sure don't have to tell you everything.

You are behaving like a three year old

because I didn't tell you about something

that was none of your business in the first place.

I was in those stands

when you didn't show up for your match.

You could have been hit by a truck or shot by a sn*per.

God knows what else.

I was at Steve's.

Why couldn't you have been nicer to him?

You have known me all your life.

You have known this man for five minutes.

You are taking his word about our meeting?

Look, I'm just trying to understand

why you wrote him off.

Because maybe I didn't want to be reminded of his father.

[tense music]

Because maybe, which is even worse,

he could be like his father.

-It's ridiculous. -No, it's not.

One of the reasons you are so precious to me,

is because you're as sweet as your father was.

I don't want to see you taken advantage of.

If Steve's father was so awful,

then why'd you see him in the first place?

[tense music]

"Happy Valentine's Day", Jesse Marie.

How sweet.

This one's from Bobby to Jessica S.

Jessica S.? Who's Jessica S.? Uh, uh, uh!

[Betsy] A girl in our class

that Bobby is in love with.

I'm not.

[Val] Mmh, mmh, mmh.

"Be my Valentine.

Love, Bobby."

I put that in all my cards.

[paper crumbles]

I don't see a card anywhere here

for your Sunday school teacher.

Which one?

I don't know. I don't remember her name.

She's the one who came out here for a puppy.

Miss Matheson?

Paige?

No, her name is Anne.

Anne?

Perhaps I know her.

[elevator dings]

[phone rings]

[phone rings]

Nice of you to join us.

Ay!

How does the other guy look?

Like he looks like a model citizen,

unfortunately.

Come on, let's go to the meeting.

Uhm, Mrs. Richfield won't be here for another half hour,

and you can't go to any meeting with a shiner.

Why not?

You came to work in a hospital bed.

Yeah, but I didn't take meetings.

You'll scare poor old Mrs. Richfield

to death with that mug,

and she'll think you want to fight rather than switch.

Excuse me, Paige,

I have some additional research

for your meeting with Mrs. Richfield.

Good. Bring it to the meeting.

I only prepared these figures

to back up Paige's presentation, sir.

I'm not even attending the meeting.

Well, you are now.

Go home and put some beef steak on that eye.

I am so sorry that happened to you.

Let's go, you guys. Movie starts in 15 minutes.

-Where's mommy? -She's not going to come.

Why not?

Because she's seen Home Alone four times already.

-I don't want to go. -Me neither.

No? Well, alright. We go see something else.

I don't want to go without mommy.

Look,

honey,

all grown-ups need time to themselves.

Mommy just needs some time alone.

You wanna take us away so we'll never see mommy again.

Honey, I'd never do that.

Mommy said you would.

You weren't supposed to tell.

Mommy said that?

She said you're only saying

she's sick so you could take us away.

[whispering] We are gonna get in trouble.

This has been on the calendar for months.

I'm sorry, I forgot.

How can you forget a Valentine's dinner?

Commercial holidays don't mean anything to me.

[Michael] They mean something to me.

They mean something to my mother.

We promised her we'd be there for dinner tonight.

You promised me we'd leave the office early today.

Michael, I walked out of that meeting this afternoon

with a dozen different things

that need to be done by tomorrow.

I'm sure your mother will understand.

I don't understand.

Don't you care about anything but work?

Oh, that is really a cheap shot.

I didn't say "Don't you care

about anything but your mother", did I?

But you don't care about anything but work.

We never go anyplace, Linda.

We never see anyone. We never go out.

You're always at the office here.

You're reading your files, you're studying your reports,

clipping the Wall Street Journal.

Linda, you're starting to be a bore.

[phone rings]

I'm sorry, Michael, I...

I didn't mean to imply that I wasn't going to go tonight.

I'm just going to be a little late, that's all.

Look, why don't you go on ahead,

buy your mom some flowers,

relax, enjoy a nice home-cooked meal.

Alright.

Sorry I called you a bore.

[pleasant music]

I'd like to speak to an officer

about having a family member brought in,

committed to a hospital

for evaluation and treatment of mental illness.

[dramatic music]

[engine starts]

[knocking on door]

If that is room service again,

I swear I am gonna stay at nothing but motel Sixes

for the rest of my life.

-What is it? -[male voice] Alexander?

[speaking foreign language]

Hi.

[speaking foreign language]

She has a cold.

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

He wants to see my tattoo.

I hope you like it.

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

[speaking foreign language]

-Bye. -[door closes]

Let me see that.

I put it on with makeup pencils.

How did you even know about it?

Well, Betty's arm fell out from under the covers

when the martini came up.

[paper crumbles]

How come you know Lithuanian?

Oh,

I had the most wonderful Lithuanian lover

when I was in Swiss boarding school.

Somebody's doll.

Hi, Dad.

Hi.

So that is yours.

Yeah.

-I've never seen it. -I've had it a while.

A very little while is my guess.

-Uhm... Bought it? -Uhm...

A friend gave it to me.

Three guesses. Which friend? And the first two don't count.

It has to be dry-cleaned.

Then I'll hand wash it.

If you'd give that kind of tender, loving care

to all your clothes,

it would be on easy street.

But I guess the stuff I get you isn't good enough.

Excuse me.

I thought this was Mrs. Ramirez desk.

It was. She no longer works here.

Why? Where is she?

Maybe you should talk to her supervisor.

-She quit? -Yes.

Who's handling her case files?

They've been divided up. I've got some.

The rest were given to other staff.

You really should see the supervisor.

Look, I will.

Have you got Jason Lochner?

You have to go through the supervisor.

Could you please look?

See if you inherited the Jason Lochner file,

and then I'll go see the supervisor.

No.

Where's the supervisor's office?

Down the hall, second door to the right.

Thank you.

[loud thud]

What are you doing with all my clothes?

I just called Goodwill to come pick them up.

Why?

Because the stuff I buy

is obviously not good enough for you.

Dad.

We'll just let your good friend

buy you a whole new wardrobe.

Put it down.

[yelling] Put it down.

[loud thud]

Is your homework finished?

[tense music]

[Mack] I just want to know

who's checking up on Jason Lochner.

Jason Lochner's case file

has been reassigned to Jesse Phillips.

-Can I talk to her? -Him.

Jesse's out sick today.

So someone else is visiting the house?

Our cases are prioritized.

That means no.

We don't have an endless supply--

[Mack] I'm not looking for an endless supply.

Just one.

One more than we have.

[Mack] Then what? What?

How are you going to find out what's happening to this kid?

When is somebody going to check the house?

Where in the hell is your safety net?

Take it up with the City Council, Mr. MacKenzie.

Forget it.

Mr. MacKenzie.

Now, I listened to you.

Now you can do me the same courtesy.

If my staff is overworked,

your complaint is not with this department.

You take it up with every elected official

from here to Sacramento,

from Sacramento to Washington,

who doesn't put children first.

Then, Mr. MacKenzie,

then take it up with your fellow citizens.

Good day.

[door closes]

[sighs]

Dinner.

Dinner.

Hey, get in there.

No.

No?

-No? -[Jason] I'm leaving.

I'm leaving.

You're eating dinner.

No. I'm leaving.

Get your butt in here.

Oh, you're not running away again?

No, I'm not running away. I'm telling you, I'm leaving.

So I'm not running away.

I didn't lay a finger on you.

I didn't lay a one damn finger on you.

You don't have the least little excuse.

You haven't got the guts!

Get home right now.

No social worker is going to blame this on me.

You're in for it, boy.

[car engine starts]

[engine roaring]

[tense music]

What have I ever done but try be the best father I could be.

And what did I ever get from you,

except lip and sass and disobedience?

You think it's easy being your father?

Do you?

You think I would have chosen a kid like you

if I'd have had a choice?

You're so damn self-centered, Jason.

[brakes screech]

You got a lot to learn, little boy.

And who better than your father to teach it to you?

This is so stupid.

We risked all this for a doll.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

It's an old Greek saying.

Look.

She looks so peaceful.

You'd think she died reading.

[g*nsh*t]

Oh!

Nick!

[Nick breathing heavily]

-[knocking on door] -Yeah.

Excuse me, Sir.

Here's some notes on today's meeting.

You are quick.

Well, I work best on a deadline.

I didn't give you a deadline.

Well, I impose them on myself,

you know, keeps the adrenaline up.

So does frustration.

This thing will not give me a floppy to take home.

-Is your disk formatted? -Yeah.

-Did you bypass options? -Yeah.

Select Transfer?

-Yep. -Press return twice.

[clicking]

Leave personal directory.

-May I? -Yeah.

[clicking on keyboards]

It's embarrassing.

It could happen to anybody.

There.

Frankly, sir, I think you've been working way too much,

considering all you've been through.

You mean physically?

Yeah. Physically. Emotionally.

Well.

All this adrenaline helps.

Yes, sir, this adrenaline really does help.

I really...

appreciate adrenaline.

And I've noticed that you have a lot of it.

I find it a very attractive quality

in a woman.

Thank you.

Very attractive.

Thank you.

Actually,

I could use a little adrenaline about now.

I'm not sure, but are you suggesting...?

With all due respect, Sir,

I don't think that you realize the impossible situation

that you've put me in here.

Please, try to see this from my point of view.

I'm an employee without even enough seniority

to get two full weeks of vacation every year.

That's who I am.

You are the boss.

If I said no,

I've hurt your feelings,

or offended you, or made you angry,

I'd say no to the boss.

I lose.

If I said yes,

I would be, to put it bluntly,

boinking the boss.

I lose again.

I am a lot younger than you,

but I have seen enough and learned enough

to know that boinking the boss never, ever works out.

It doesn't. It's always a mistake.

So please understand that you seem to have put me

between a rock and a hard place.

I was on my way

to my future mother-in-law's house for dinner,

and that's where I'm going.

I'm not going to say no,

I'm not going to say yes.

I'm just going to leave.

It's not that I don't appreciate the fact

that you've been through a lot,

especially recently.

It's just that I simply cannot,

cannot become emotionally involved

with my boss.

Well, who said anything about emotional involvement?

I was just thinking about getting my adrenaline up.

Oh.

[romantic music]

[theme music playing]

[music continues]