12x20 - Gone Microfiching

[bunniefuu]

[theme music]

-What do you suggest we do? -[Anne] We wait.

-[Nick] Until? -Until the puppy...

...empties its stomach.

[instrumental music]

How long?

Well, it's an itty bitty puppy.

How long can it take?

Don't need to sell it.

I'm saving it for my lunch tomorrow.

[Julie] Why? It'll be soggy.

-Are you on a diet? -Mm-hmm.

Oh, for Charlotte?

No, for me.

-Daddy? -Mm-hm.

What do you know about safe sex?

[chuckles] Uh...

Do you mean safe sex against A*DS?

Mm-hm.

[sighs]

Well.

I know that if you're going to have sex.

If you're going to go all the way

you have to have a condom.

-Do you know what that is? -Mhm.

-You do? -Mm-hm.

Well.

I know that...

you should use a latex condom.

The virus can get through the other kind, which is...

Lambskins?

-Yeah. -Alright.

Julie.

As your father, I feel it's my duty to say this to you.

I know you're gonna think it's old fashioned

and out of date, but I got to say it.

There's more to sex than just the sex.

There's love and commitment.

They're the most important part.

It's almost like a prerequisite.

Also...

I think you are way too young to be thinking about any of this

Daddy, I'm not asking for myself

I'm asking for you.

I mean, I know you haven't been dating in, what?

Twenty years?

I was just a little worried you might not know the basics,

but you're okay.

So goodnight.

[intriguing music]

[Nick] Anything yet?

[Anne] No, not yet.

[Nick] This is the most ridiculous thing

I've ever been involved in.

[Anne] Come on, eat.

I'm sorry that I...

accused you of having affair.

Like, I can't believe that I did that.

Would you do me a favor?

Next time you accuse me of seeing somebody.

Could it be a mysterious brunette?

Or a redhead?

But not Anne Matheson.

Would you like to help me make a list of names

that I could choose from?

Yeah, but no blondes. You spoil me for blondes.

Even with this stupid haircut?

Do you want the truth?

Yep.

[laughs] I think it's kind of cute.

Gary, I know I have to go back to the hospital today, but...

Before we go, could we maybe just...

go for a nice long walk together? Just the two of us?

Sure, but let me get dressed.

I'll take this.

-That's pretty cool. -Thank you.

You know, maybe we could...

We could, you know, go down by the creek where the...

[whispering] Gary.

-Gary. -[Gary] What?

I want to go back to the hospital now.

[Gary] What about our walk?

I'm starting to hallucinate.

[whispering] Hallucinate.

[Frank] You remember the first time you and I argued?

I don't know what it was about.

Must have been about housework.

We could never decide who was supposed to do what.

I do remember that made me feel real bad.

So I bought you a bouquet of flowers just like this one.

We couldn't afford flowers.

So we argued about that.

And we decided that if we were going to spend money

on something to make up with,

it had to be more practical.

We decided on ice cream.

You remember? After one of those arguments?

You said if anything ever happened to you.

You hoped...

that I would not be afraid to go out with other women.

Start over again.

You were just kidding.

I never forgot it.

Charlotte's a nice woman.

She's a teacher. She likes kids.

She's got a funny laugh.

I know she'd be good for Julie.

I drink too much coffee, huh?

I didn't say anything.

Yeah, my wife did.

Well, wives do that.

Husbands too, come to think of it.

She was always trying to get me to take better care of myself.

And when she didn't think, I was doing a good enough job...

-Let's split it. -Split it, yeah.

She'd get angry and she'd say go ahead and k*ll yourself.

If I die first, you'll never find another woman

that's going to put up with you anyway.

[both laugh]

But when she's in a good mood, she says, you know what?

I can't stand the thought of me being gone

and you being here with another woman.

I think she could stand you up.

[laughs]

Well, I'll take that as a compliment.

-Thanks. -But?

-I didn't say but. -Oh, but I heard but.

Well, I was going to say...

but we've only had a few dates.

Yeah, it's true. Few dates though.

Can get serious after a while.

I know that much from high school.

We're not exactly in high school.

Charlotte, are you seeing someone else?

I go out with other men, if that's what you're asking.

Yeah, that's what I'm asking.

I don't want a commitment, Frank.

So I've been getting all serious out here by myself, huh?

Well, it's understandable, Frank.

You have been married a long time.

Do you intend to ever get serious with anyone?

Two marriages.

Two divorces.

That's enough serious for me.

So you're just going to keep on dating?

I don't know if I can go out

with a woman who's dating other men.

Well then, maybe you and I shouldn't date.

Are you serious?

We've got plenty of hangers in here

and a blanket if you need one, and another pillow.

Oh, and the bathroom is right down the hall

and the towels are in the...

Oh, do you have a toothbrush? I could get you one.

Oh no, that's fine.

Does that mean you have one or you don't have one?

I'll pick one up for you.

And I put some books in here for you to read.

I hope you like some

and you can do your homework over here on the desk.

You just move the stereo.

Yeah, or do it downstairs in the dining room.

Anywhere, anywhere you want.

We just... we want you to feel at home.

Okay.

Jason.

"Mi casa es su casa " , as they say.

Is there anything at all you need?

No, I'm fine, really. Thanks.

Alright, we'll see you later.

Doctor said get some rest.

[Mack] You rest.

Hey, what do you want to eat?

What do you want for dinner? First night in the house.

Anything you want. Karen will cook.

Whatever you guys are going to have before I came is fine.

Rest.

I really don't need to rest.

I'm going to be home all day, so if you need anything at all,

just, you know, holler.

Thank you.

Braised chicken livers?

-Uh-huh, have you ever tried it? -No.

Alright, well, then don't be so quick to judge.

It's a fabulous restaurant. You should really try it.

Well, maybe you should show me.

It's a deal.

When?

How about tomorrow night?

Oh, wow.

This is amazing.

Oh, my psychic told me

that I was going to bring her someone from the workplace.

You're a psychic?

Yes, and she's having this group reading

tomorrow night.

This is when you can come.

And then we'll go eat.

What sign are you?

Uh... I don't know.

Well, when's your birthday?

September 29.

A Libra?

Oh my God, she said a Libra.

She is so accurate.

She told me not to buy a red car.

The next week I read more red cars

than any other color get in accidents.

You know, while we're there, maybe she could do your chart.

Oh, wow.

I just realized... I'm looking at my schedule here

and I got daughters night and my parents school tomorrow.

I can't make this. I'm so sorry.

I should never have brought the thing up.

Look, why don't I call you later in the week?

We'll try to get together then maybe, okay?

Yeah, you take care. See you. Bye.

Oh.

[elevator dings]

Good morning, Fairgate.

Good morning, Mr. Sumner.

The numbers look good.

Industrials are up.

But the market is so volatile.

I guess that means the prudent investor

will have to stay on the market for the long haul.

[elevator dings]

[Paige] Good morning.

-Morning. -Good morning.

Here's an article about a book.

Supposedly that lifts the veil of corporate secrecy in Japan.

Anybody read that?

Yes. Isn't it the one that talks about how they have to force

disclosures from their corporate families?

-Yeah. -I read that review.

Talks about how secretive they are, the...

Keiretsu.

I read the book.

Still got the Schuler meeting at 10?

Oh no, I changed it to 11.

Oh, I'm glad I asked.

-Jason? -[Jason] Yeah, I'm here.

Do you have any clothespins?

Clothespins? I-I don't...

You're supposed to be resting.

I got tired of resting.

I figured since I had to do my laundry

I might as well do some of your laundry

that was around here too.

-But... -Don't worry about it.

I know what I'm doing.

I separate the lights from the darks

and make sure the dryer doesn't shrink all the cottons.

My dad taught me how.

You don't have to do this.

Any of this.

No, no, it's no problem, really.

I like keeping busy.

-[Anne] This is impossible. -[Nick] Give it to me.

Give it to me, please.

-Ready? -Careful.

It could have exploded or something.

It would have to be a very tiny b*mb.

You are so unsettled.

[Anne] A dot?

We did all this for a little dot?

Microfiche.

What are microfiche?

[Nick] Do you need glasses?

[Anne] No, it's just too small.

[Nick] If you need glasses, why don't you get them?

Women are so fake.

Let's just ask somebody for help.

-Okay? -No.

[sighs]

I bet you have a thing about road maps too.

Men hate to ask for help.

I don't ask for help

because I don't know who we can trust. Anyway.

We know enough to contact our friend, the appraiser.

I don't call somebody who sends armed hooligans

after me a friend.

[man 1] Shh.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

This guy could be dangerous, you know.

Without a question.

Then why are you calling him?

Because it's safer than putting up posters

microfiche for sale, contact Anne and Dimitri.

-[man] Garden's Antiques. -Hi.

This is Dimitri.

Are you still interested in buying the doll?

Yes.

It's for sale, 250,000.

Do you have any nines?

So, what do you want for lunch?

-[Meg] We already ate lunch. -I hope you don't mind.

Well, I don't mind at all.

What'd you make?

Uh, cheese sandwich, carrot sticks and orange.

I like Jason's sandwiches better than yours, mom.

-[phone ringing] -Oh, you do, do you?

Hello.

What's up?

Well, no, I-I can't come in today.

I left my notes on your desk.

Well, that's not my fault.

Oh, can't you get another air date?

-Mrs. MacKenzie? -Hold on.

I could... I could take care of Meg.

Oh, honey.

I have to get a babysitter. You have to rest.

Meg, would you like to go over Sherry's?

Yeah.

Alright. You got me. I'll begin in an hour.

Meg, get your coat.

Jason, I'm very sorry.

I'll be back before dinner.

Oh no, don't hurry on my account, really.

Bye.

[sighs]

[Mack] What's this?

Frank, did you say something?

No, uh-uh. I didn't say nothing.

I thought I heard a voice.

Oh, very funny.

Oh, it's this guy.

You do look familiar. Do I know you?

I think it's a guy that used to work here.

That's where I've seen his face before.

Alright, he's back to work. Jokes are getting old.

Alright, Peggy, we're on with Coleman

and Misers at 4 o'clock.

But try and get me an appointment with the DA,

either just before or just after.

Or bump up the appointment for an hour,

because I want to be home for dinner tonight.

No, you've got two other continuances to deal with

and the DA already called.

See if you can get them back, will you?

Hey, we've got an out of court settlement in the Damon case.

It's old news, Mack.

What the hell is this?

Judge Percal filed a complaint with the State Bar against me.

-I told you about that. -Three pages long?

Who's Judge Percal?

Jason's judge in the dependency case.

He used to be a deputed DA.

He didn't like me too much then, either.

[Frank] I thought your contempt was lifted.

"Manufactured false evidence.

"in two cases with which I was directly involved.

"His contempt of my court was consistent

"with a pattern of behavior and attitude

"best described as acting as if he is above the law.

"Not bound

"by the standard of professional conduct

"expected of every officer of the court

"and defined by State Bar code of ethics."

He wants to get you disbarred.

But who's going to buy that?

Who's going to take him seriously?

[Paige] And I need it by tomorrow, okay?

-Okay, you got it. -Alright, I owe you one.

Alright.

Hi.

-Hi. -How have you been?

Oh, fine.

I haven't seen much of you lately.

Yeah, well, different offices,

you know, different departments.

I see you're still burning the midnight oil.

Gosh, I guess I'm a hopeless case.

Mhm.

You know, Michael,

I still consider you a friend.

I mean, you were really one of the only people

I could ever talk to.

I was kind of hoping that maybe we could...

I don't know, maintain some kind of a connection.

I mean, maybe just go out and have lunch once in a while

if it's not too awkward.

No, I think I can handle that.

Great.

-It's almost lunchtime. -Do you want to go now?

Well, unless you're too busy. And what are you working on?

Oh, Paige asked me to run some figures

on a company the Sumner Group is interested in,

but I can do this after lunch.

-Mexican? -How can I resist?

Oh, gosh, I've completely forgot. I've got an appointment.

No, you know what? I'm going to take some time for myself.

I just need to reschedule.

You know, Pedro is always really busy this time of day.

Maybe you should run ahead and get us a table.

Oh, I think we'll be fine.

Carolyn, can I reschedule the 12:30 till later this afternoon?

Great. Thank you.

-Let's go. -Alright.

Oh sh**t, I forgot my file. I'll meet you at the elevator.

Okay.

[suspenseful music]

Talib?

-You ready? -My bad.

[suspenseful music]

[Nick] I don't think Paige will be glad to see us.

Look, I'm exhausted. I'm hungry.

I spent the night in a barn.

She's my daughter. How mean can she be?

The last time we were here, she called the police.

Yeah, well, she's impulsive, but she's not...

you know, deep down nasty.

She changed the lock.

Do you have a hairpin?

Or breaking and entering is something in the category

of skinning puppies? Something you don't approve of.

Boy, just pick it.

[instrumental music]

Hello.

-[Anne] Nick. -[Nick] Give me a treat.

-Hi. -Do you have the map?

No.

But we know where it is.

I must have it back.

Why?

It is a matter of national security.

Mm. Why?

You will be heroes if you return it.

[laughs]

We'd rather have the $300,000.

[clears throat] American.

[Frank] So my daughter calls me in.

Julie is my daughter.

I got this thing going round and round

on the rotisserie outside

and she says Marion is on the phone.

Well, my partner Mack, his real name is Marion.

So I figured he's just playing around.

Grab the phone, "Man, what the hell are you calling me for?

"I'm out there making a fool out of myself barbecue

"and you are calling me on the telephone?"

[laughs] Well, there's...

There's this long pause.

Then this voice says, "Mr. Williams,

"this is Sister Marion from Saint Martin's Church

"calling all the neighbors

to tell them about the strawberry festival."

[laughs]

Did you go?

Eh?

To the Strawberry Festival, did you go?

-No. -Why not?

[band playing]

So who do you want to sell the map to?

One side offers 250,000, the other 300,000.

I think we can get more.

Don't be greedy.

Don't be chicken.

[laughs] We'll just duplicate the dot.

And sell it to both of them?

Mhm.

You are such a beautiful woman.

I met your father in September of 1962.

He was my history professor.

He was funny and warm and very intelligent.

And married.

Well, what was his name?

Bryce Oliver.

[suspenseful music]

His wife was paralyzed from a stroke.

So to help take care of her

Bryce hired some students from the university

to come in a few afternoons a week to help out.

I needed the money, so I applied for the job.

And she liked me.

Kate said you said or acted like you didn't have a choice.

I wasn't going to get an ab*rtion

and he wasn't going to leave his wife.

-Did you tell him about me? -No.

[music continues]

-Well, not before you... -Do you have a picture?

Oh, no. No.

But I'm sure we could get one.

Well, I guess...

I should say thanks.

Thanks.

You don't have his address, do you?

He died before you were born.

She's from Chicago, originally, she had a boyfriend,

but that's over

and I think you'd have a great time together.

-Really? -Mhm.

You love the Neville Brothers and she has an extra ticket.

I told her you'd call.

Great taste in music.

She's waiting for your call.

[Frank laughs]

[woman speaking in singsong] Hi, hi, hi. Don't say bye, bye, bye,

because you have reached Melinda

I'm not home right now.

You can reach me at 213-555-7070 until one o'clock

and after that, you can try with 135-556-798

or 818-555-002

and if it's really important my beeper number is 555-2808 2

and my car phone is 555-9555.

So don't cry, cry, cry. Call me bye, bye, bye.

-So, well? -Uh...

-She wasn't at home. -She didn't leave a number?

No answer.

I must have called the wrong number.

-I'll try it later. -Okay.

[phone rings]

MacKenzie Law Offices. Oh, sure.

Just a second, Karen line one.

Hey, my little darling.

[laughs]

Honey, I'm not going to make it home for dinner.

Well, I can't either.

Oh, no. One of us has to be home for dinner.

I can't, DA has two witnesses I can't put off anymore.

Can't Frank do it?

[laughs] He's not an attorney yet.

And if I don't watch my P's and Q's, I won't be one either.

What does that mean?

Well, the judge I had a run in with over Jason.

He's out to nail me with the State Bar.

-Oh. -It's nothing.

But, you know, he's jerking me around.

I just can't make waves with the DA.

Oh, hold on.

Just keep it going until we get to zeroscape.

Honey, I'm sorry.

I got to stay here until I finish this table.

We're not going to make the air date.

Karen, he'll survive. It's only dinner.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

We have to make life as normal as possible.

Worst things have happened to him.

I'll call him and tell him.

Alright, and I'll call Sherry's mother

and ask if Meg can stay for dinner.

[Mack] Okay.

Oh, honey.

-It happens. -Yeah, right.

[Karen] It'll be good for him. He'll be able to rest.

-Right. -Mack?

I'll see you tonight.

Bye.

[doorbell rings]

Julie. Hey.

-Hi. -Come on in.

Oh, my God. Are you okay?

I mean, it looks like it really hurts.

Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, really.

-How are you doing? -Okay.

-Well, you have to read up -[phone rings]

to chapter 16 by Monday.

You get to prepare for a quiz if you're going to be back...

and maybe want to answer the phone?

[phone ringing]

-MacKenzie Residence. -Jason, how you doing?

-Oh, hey, I'm fine. -Hey, listen.

Both Karen and myself, we can't make it home for dinner tonight.

[Mack] I'm really sorry.

Oh, yeah, that's no problem.

But I'll tell you one.

You check out the microwave dinners in the freezer.

The lasagna is my personal favorite.

The vegetarian lasagna.

Okay, yeah, but what about Meg?

She's going to have dinner at Sherry's.

So I won't be home until about 8 o'clock.

Do you think you can keep the house

from burning down until then?

Yeah, no problem.

[laughs] That's my man. And I'll catch you later.

-Bye. -Bye.

-[Julie] Happy birthday. -What?

What do you mean "what"? Happy birthday.

How did you know? I completely forgot it.

Miss Anderson told me, it was in the attendance records.

Well?

[both laugh]

Cool. I like it.

-Thank you very much. -You're welcome.

So is Mack and Karen going to have ice cream and cake

for you and all that corny stuff?

No, I told them not to.

Well, I thought you forgot about it.

I did after, I told them. I forgot then.

Well, I got a lot of work to do so.

I have to go. But it's good seeing you.

Yeah. I'll see you later.

Okay. Bye.

[Jason] Take care.

-Say hi to everyone for me. -I will, bye.

I got the figures you asked for.

-Great. Any problems? -No.

Thank you. Thanks so much. I really appreciate it.

Who is this Talib Corporation?

They seem pretty shaky based on these figures.

Yeah, that's why I needed them.

Their prospectus says that they're swimming in assets,

but everything's overvalued.

So why does it have to be so confidential?

You never know who's snooping around.

[Linda] So you see, Talib Corporation stock

is undervalued by at least $15 a share.

Now, I've already made some preliminary calls...

-You what? -To get a sense of the market.

Who told you to get a sense of the market?

Well, I thought--

You're not paid to think those thoughts.

You're paid to do research.

You do the research.

Someone else reads the research and they think those thoughts.

And the one thought that no one should think around here

is that we buy Talib Corporation.

It stinks!

It's garbage stock.

They're a bunch of slime buckets

who managed to steal a half a million dollars

from me last year.

If you had gone through the proper channels

instead of doing an end run

trying to score some brownie points,

you would have found that out and not wasted my time.

Aggressiveness and stupidity are fatal combination, woman.

-Hi, dad. -Hi.

-Come from work early? -Mm-hm.

-How was your day? -It was good.

I got an A on my chemistry assignment.

Well, that's great.

-Come here. That's for the A. -Thank you.

You look warm.

Yeah, I've got to go. I have to meet Horace at the library.

For what?

Study or rumble?

Rumble?

Yeah, you know, James Dean, Sal Mineo.

[humming]

What? [laughing]

Sorry, the jacket open.

Oh, this is Horace's.

Oh, Horace's, it's wonderful.

The guy wants you to wear his jacket?

Yeah, well, I'll be home in time to help you with dinner.

-Okay? -Julie.

I do respect your need for privacy.

I also have a need to want to know everything about you.

Something you want to volunteer?

Daddy, I think it's okay for you to ask me what you want to know

and if I think it's too personal then I'll just tell you so.

Okay. Are you going steady?

Daddy, that's too personal.

Julie, a long time ago...

I was maybe 16 years old in a history class.

I sat next to this girl.

Her name was Melanie Rose.

She was gorgeous.

I had this terrible need to be grown up.

I wanted to know what was ahead for me in life.

I wanted all of life's uncertainties

to be made clear.

The only way I could figure to do that, to be grown up,

was to get married.

So, I asked Melanie Rose to elope with me.

I did, and she accepted.

-[laughs] No way. -It's the truth.

[Julie laughs]

Fortunately, our parents got wind of the whole thing.

They put a stop to it.

I was mad as hell.

But at the time,

I had no way of knowing

that within a few years I would meet your mother.

Now, if I had committed my entire life to Melanie Rose,

I would have made a serious mistake.

I needed more time for me.

More time to meet and see other people.

I know where this is going.

You do? Then let me finish.

Baby, I hope you're not in the same kind of hurry

I was in.

If two people are right for each other

there is no need to rush into a commitment.

Daddy, I really think you worry too much.

Julie, what? Are you going to marry this guy?

Dad, Horace lent me his jacket because I was cold

and I'm giving it back to him tonight, that's all.

Bye.

[instrumental music]

I got to learn to chill out.

[eerie music]

[man] Hey, do you have any spare change?

-[Nick] Hey. -Hey, I don't have a problem.

Listen to me. Listen to me.

Would you like to make $20?

Sure.

Who's he?

Life insurance.

[dramatic music]

Your turn.

Thank you.

[music crescendos]

No, no. This is my treat.

In that case, why don't you just make it an even dozen?

-Thanks. -Sure.

So, she told you his name?

Bryce Oliver from Rochester, New York.

Showed me everything.

Was I right?

Nah, true love.

She won't tell me anything.

You wanna know? He was her history professor.

He was married.

The wife was paralyzed.

Mom fell in love with him.

Mom got pregnant.

The good professor never knew, and the good professor died.

That's awful.

Yep, Danielle Steele could have done a better job.

[Kate] Do you think she's lying?

I know she's lying.

[instrumental music]

[sighs]

[phone beeps]

-Yes? -Was that an editorial comment?

No, it helps me concentrate.

Don't take it personally.

My daughter's old boyfriend had excellent taste.

And a lot of money to be able to afford this.

Well, that's because he's very pragmatic.

You mean dirty.

Well, at least we should be grateful.

that he was still horrendous.

[instrumental music]

What the hell is this?

-What? -These hundreds.

Where'd you get them?

This couple, a tall guy and a blonde woman.

Hey, they dropped a bundle.

Yeah, well, congratulations, meatball. We just got taken.

All these bills are counterfeit.

Working late?

I had to earn some brownie points.

I got a real chewing out from the boss today.

This is some research on Rick Vin.

They run a really tight ship.

-Linda. -Business is business.

I screwed up.

I don't expect you to treat me any differently

than any other employee.

That is during business hours.

[instrumental music]

[sighing]

[instrumental music]

[doorbell rings]

[sighs] Hello.

Hi.

Would you like to come in?

I don't know.

-You want me to come in? -I don't know.

Do you want me to want you to come in?

[laughs]

That does it. I know we are back in high school now.

[Frank laughs]

-Let's start again. -Okay.

I am so glad to see you.

Glad you said that.

-See, I changed my mind. -About?

About seeing you, dating.

Even if there are other men.

I have a friend in to dinner. We are just going to have dessert.

-Would you like to come in? -No, I just wanted to say that.

No. Come on in.

You're all I've been talking about this evening

and she is dying to meet you.

-She? -She.

She's one of my old teachers.

[Frank] She?

[Frank laughs]

-[Karen] Jason? -[Mack] Jason?

[Jason] Yo, I'm in the kitchen.

You're home early.

You brought food.

Yeah. What are you doing? What are you guys doing?

Just cooking some roast chicken, mashed potatoes and carrots.

Oh, you made dinner?

Yeah, but you're home early.

I was cooking everything to be ready at 8:00.

No problem. I just put this in the refrigerator.

I'll get that.

-[Mack] Okay. -[Karen] Good.

And...

-Get the cake ready. -[whispering] The cake.

We got to get the cake and see what we have here.

Where did you learn to cook, Jason?

I used to do it for my dad, mainly.

Oh, this looks wonderful.

That's no big deal.

[Meg] Jason.

Come here, I want to see you.

[all singing] Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday, dear Jason.

Happy birthday to you.

Make a wish.

Can I help blow it out?

[dramatic music]

Why is he crying?

I don't know.

Blow them out.

[doleful music]

[knocking on door]

[Jason crying]

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

I'm sorry that Meg had to see me like this.

Maybe you could tell her I was sick or something.

Jason.

Hey, don't be so hard on yourself, will you?

Perfect people give me the creeps.

Jason, don't be afraid, we are not going to disappear.

You're not going to wake up one day

and find out we don't want you. We're here, pal.

You're stuck with us.

Happy birthday.

[theme music]