02x08 - You've Got a Friend

[bunniefuu]

Keep your drawers on, folks.

Keep your drawers on, o.k.?

Just keep your drawers on.

The store don't open up for another two minutes.

Look here, old man. It's my woman's birthday.

Get your old behind out of the way.

What--what are you--

You want to mess with me, boy?

You want to mess with me, boy?

No, he did not climb the rope.

Did the boy climb the rope

When I said we had two minutes?

Did you call old otis old?

That's what I heard. Can you hear, old man?

I think the boy's a little comedian today.

Uh, uh, you calling this man old here, boy?

Oh, yeah, most definitely.

What about this woman, boy?

She's older than he is.

Now, what you trying to prove?

Nothing at all, there, son. Nothing.

What we have is a failure to communicate

With the young folk and the older folk.

Is that right, boy?

That's right.

This boy don't have home training.

Back in the days,

Whenever a boy would disrespect one of the elders,

You follow me? We had a thing called--

Wha-wha-what's the name of it?

It was called "whupping a*s."

You about to feel that right now, boy.

Oh, yeah.

He--he dropped old otis.

Otis ain't-- otis ain't been down since '.

Let me show you how I float by, y'all.

You're going to knock old otis down, huh? Look out.

Look out, huh?

Where you at?

Captioning made possible by warner bros.

♪ Martin ♪

How y'all been? ♪ Martin

♪ Martin ♪

♪ Martin ♪

Martin, hurry up, baby.

We'll be late for the play.

Coming.

I guess you won't go, huh?

No, I'm going even if it kills me, gina.

All right...unh...

Gina!

Gina, I can't see nothing!

Baby, my world is gone. What's happening?

Gina!

Pretty please.

O.k., Martin. I knew you wouldn't go,

So I asked pam to go with me.

See, you know me. You know that ain't my thing, huh?

I remember when it used to be.

When we first dated, we used to go everywhere together.

Gina, baby, that's because

I was trying to get some.

You know what I mean?

And every day you made me glad I gave it.

We can go in the room for some more.

I don't have time now.

[Knock on door]

I'll only be a minute.

I know that.

Hey, girl.

You ready?

Yeah. Here's the money for my ticket.

Oh, no. Wallace already paid for our tickets.

He did?

Yes, he did, girl.

He is so sweet.

Oh, ma'am, hold that.

First of all, pam, when you come in my apartment,

You acknowledge me, o.k.?

This is my house.

I told you that in the fight party.

Respect my house!

Hi, martin.

Aah! Bye, martin.

Come on, gina.

Fine. Let her roll. She's irrelevant, o.k.?

Let's rap to you, o.k.?

Let's talk to you.

Um...wallace.

Who this?

He's just a friend from work.

Baby, what do you need a male friend for, gina?

Pam's all the man you need.

I'm man enough to bust you in your head.

I'm not there with you. I'm with my lady right now.

Martin, what is the big deal?

He's just a friend-- a friend.

Gina, don't you get it? That's what they say.

First they say they want to go to the ballet.

Next thing, they're at your door butt naked,

Talking about how he's so alone.

You did that.

It worked, too, didn't it?

Martin, wallace is nothing like you.

See, he's sweet, and he's sensitive.

Oh!

The brother's a punk.

Fine, go and have a good time.

Why you ain't say nothing, girl?

Gina, pam,

Tell wallace I said, "hey..

Something broke."

Bye.

I took my boss and said,

"I want my money! Give me a raise!"

What y'all think about that?

Uh...do that, man. That's your thing.

Tommy, I don't mean to get in your business,

And--and I think cole feels the same way, too,

But you know how cole works at the airport

And I work on the radio?

What the hell do you do for a living?

Come on, martin!

Man, we've been friends damn near our whole lives.

You know what I do.

Oh, right!

You work on the, uh--

I don't know that.

You ask him.

Hey, look, guys, we going to eat,

Or are we waiting on gina?

We ain't got to wait on gina.

She went to the museum with her friend wallace.

Hold up!

You--mmm.

You let your girl gina

Go on a date with another brother?

Come on, man. That what you thought, it was a date?

He's her friend from work. That's all.

♪ She say he just a friend ♪

♪ She say he just a friend ♪

♪ Oh, baby, you ♪♪

Wait, wait, hold it.

Hey, no, no. Don't even go there with that one.

O.k.? Now, tommy, you a decent brother, all right?

You have a lot of women friends.

Clarise, bro.

Nope. Sorry, martin, but I got in those drawers.

What was up with belita?

Oh, yeah, yeah,

We werereal good friends.

Wait a minute! Martin,

You had a woman friend last year, who was that?

Oh, yeah, that's right. That was uh...uh...

That would be gina. Mm-hmm.

So, uh...y'all think the brother's trying

To play me for my girl?

Well, maybe he's the first man in history

Who really enjoys women for their conversation alone.

Know what?

I ain't listening to y'all.

The last six times I listened to you,

I made an a*s out of myself, o.k.?

I believe gina. I trust my woman, o.k.?

If she says he's just a friend,

He's just a friend.

I'm cool.

O.k.?

All right.

Now, if you will excuse me,

I got to go check up on my woman.

So you think you can fix it?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, hey!

Hey, babe. Back from the museum?

You were just about to miss us, martin.

We're going shoe shopping.

You and...

How you doing? I'm wallace.

Gina's told me a lot about you.

What's up, wall?

She shouldn't have to tell you much about me.

Everybody knows me-- whazzup!

Martin payne, wzup radio, bro?

Whazzup?

Oh, is that what you do?

Gina, I see you told the brother a lot about me.

Heh heh. Excuse me.

Baby, we're just friends. Please.

No, baby. I'm not saying nothing.

I'm not saying a brother's trying to pull up on you.

I'm sure wallace got a girlfriend.

No, I don't.

Oh...oh, you got a boyfriend. O.k.

Hey, whatever makes your boat float, you know?

No, I'm not like that. I'm still looking.

Martin, lighten up, o.k.?

Let's go before the mall gets too crowded.

Yeah, we may not be able to get "animal crackers."

Oh, yeah, when you did the thing in the sink--

Oh, martin!

We got, like, a private joke.

Me and wallace were at this restaurant,

And then he-- forget it. You had to be there.

No, no, gina. I get it, o.k.?

"Animal crackers."

That's hilarious there, wallace.

Now, that should go in the comedy hall of fame.

Whoo!

Uh...heh heh.

Wheeeew.

Um...let's get going, wallace.

I'll go get my checkbook, o.k.?

Oh, wallace, hey, brother, brother.

Damn that!

Here, I think you better raise up, wallace.

I mean...just--just raise, o.k.?

Look, look, wallace.

I don't know what's going on.

I'm not accusing you of nothing, but something's going on.

And until I find out,

Only man going to be spending time with gina is her man.

Martin, we just friends.

Come on. We going shoe shopping.

Uh-huh, uh-huh. Somebody done told you wrong, brother.

Back up a taste,

Just a taste. Just give me some room.

O.k., The door's going to slam about now.

I'm ready.

Where's wallace?

You threw him out, didn't you?

What is going on?

What's going on is a day of you and your man

Shoe shopping.

Gina, do you know who you're looking at?

Do you know, do you know?

An insane man?

Naw, girl.

Your best friend!

With my woman.

Dag!

Look at the daggone things!

Whew! I know, you going

For that christy love look, ain't you?

Freeze, sugar!

♪ Christy love ♪♪

Whew! Baby, baby, baby! Girl, I'm glad I came with you.

'Cause I'm chilling at the shoe store with my snookums.

[Alarm rings]

[Alarm rings]

[Alarm rings]

Yo, baby! Yo, baby! This old lady just got arrested,

And she ain't do nothing.

She going down.

Good, martin. Look, I'm glad you're here.

What do you think? What's your opinion?

Gina, you're not finished yet?

No, I'm narrowing it down.

Now, how do these look?

Like the last pair you tried on.

Just get the red pumps.

Martin, see? I knew you hated this.

I should've brought wallace.

No, no!

You don't say that!

That was mean, baby!

It's just, gina, we been here for three hours, o.k.?

After a while, all these shoes start to look alike.

How can you say that?

It's obvious this is sandy brown,

And that's gravel brown.

Excuse me, but I wasn't even talking to you, bigfoot.

No, I'm sorry, babe,

But she trying on shoes when she should be trying on the boxes.

What, what?

Well, we going-- we can roll.

Martin!

Come on!

My--my mama ain't raised no fool.

Calm down.

All right. The lady, she push me

Like she going to do something!

Martin, please go browse.

I'll go match you some stuff up. Uh-huh.

Excuse me, do you have this in blue, size ?

No, I don't!

See, because I don't work here.

Why does a brother always got to work at the shoe shop?

Can we shop?

Excuse me. What's the problem?

There's no problem.

Listen to me. You're out of the 'hood now, g.

I got my eye on you.

I guess you do, you fake cop.

You a rent-a-cop, ain't you, man?

To show you how much they care,

They ain't give you no g*n.

They gave you a flashlight.

What you going to do--i see you?

I bet this is a clip-on tie, ain't it?

Clip-on. Oh!

Gina, are you ready?

Yeah. I just need to know one thing.

Do you like these or these?

Those.

These? Are you sure? Because if I get the heel,

I can wear them with my skirt and my pants,

But the flats I can only wear with my pants.

[Cartoon noise]

What do you think?

Right on.

Martin, you are no help!

Excuse me, miss, can I see every shoe you have in taupe?

Thank you.

Every shoe? Gi--

You know...oh...oh!

Man, oh, man, oh, man!

Whew!

What's happening, bro?

How you doing, my man?

What are you in here for?

Man, I promised my girl I would be her best friend.

Yeah. Tell me about it.

You done messed up.

Well, sometimes you mess up in life, brother.

So, look here, man.

You think I can read one of those magazines?

Nope. I'm reading 'em.

All of 'em?

Yep.

But you're not reading that one on the top there.

No. But I might want to in a minute.

When you get ready to read it, let me know!

Uh-uh-uh! I wouldn't do that.

I been sitting in this chair six hours straight,

And I'm ready to snap.

All right. All right!

Damn!

Whew!

Damn, brother. I'm sorry!

Man, you think after the rodney king incident,

Two brothers could sit and get a rap.

Excuse me! Phew!

You going to give me one of these magazines!

You going to give me one of these magazines!

You going to let me read one, all right?

You again.

Hey. Now, this is your second warning.

Next time, you're going to roll up out of here.

Well, you ain't got to be grabbing me.

I'm getting ready to leave in a minute with my girl.

Excuse me!

Did I say taupe?

I'm sorry. I meant every shoe in brown.

Gina, you going to have to hurry up.

I can't take this no more.

Wallace never gets tired.

You mean to tell me wallace sits in the store five hours

And never complains while you and pam try on shoes?

Yeah. He says he enjoys it.

Girl, that's all I need to know.

Hello, operator,

This is going to sound crazy,

But give me the number for a brother named wallace.

No, I don't have a last name.

Run 'em all down to me.

Woman, I ain't got nothin' but time.

I'm in a shoe store!

Your message, man.

So...whazzup?

That's what you do, right?

Uh, wallace, uh, sit down, brother.

Let's rap a taste.

O.k. Wallace, this is your chance to come clean, brother,

Because no straight brother I know

Can spend time at ballets and shoe stores

Unless he was up to something.

I mean, whazzup, man?

Is it that obvious?

Oh, hell, yes, it's obvious, bro, o.k.?

I got to tell you like this.

Chill with gina, o.k.?

'Cause if I have to go back to shoe stores,

Man, wallace, I'm liable to k*ll somebody, man.

Wait--

Whupping a*s. I don't know what my mental mind is.

You misunderstood.

I'm not after gina.

Well, then--

I'm just hanging around gina to get to pam.

Who?

Pam.

Buckshot pam. Beady beady pam?

Yeah. Yeah.

Run-over shoes pam.

Stank attitude pam.

Yeah! She's all that.

And...she's just my type,

But she doesn't want anything to do with me

Because I work for her.

Oh, wallace, man!

Oh!

Wallace, man! You can get with pam.

Brother, you just got to spend time with her.

I sent her to pick up gina

'Cause I couldn't take it no more.

They should be down there another, what--eight, nine hours.

Really? Man, do you really think I can hook up with pam?

Man, please. Most definitely, man.

Ain't nothing to it but to do it.

You know?

Oh, you going to need these.

Man, I like that, though.

It's like an affirmation, right?

Ain't nothing to it but to do it.

Fine. Say it one more time.

Ain't nothing to it but to do it.

Let me hear you feel it.

Ain't nothing to it but to do it!

♪ Give it to me one more time ♪

♪ Ain't nothin' to it but to do it ♪

♪ Ain't nothin' to it but to do it ♪

Back yourself up.

Slow it down.

♪ Ain't nothin' to it but to do it ♪

♪ Ain't nothin' to it but to do it ♪

♪ Ain't nothin' to it ♪ ain't nothin' to it ♪

♪ But to do it ♪ ♪ but to do it ♪♪

Oh, wallace!

Hey, martin.

Yeah.

Um...i know why

You scared wallace away this afternoon,

And that's why I kept you at the shoe store so long,

'Cause I had to teach you a lesson.

Martin...

I'm going to have male friends.

You know that, right?

Oh, it's cool.

I'm thinking about a sandwich, making a sandwich.

I ain't thinkin' about what you said.

But, uh...you know,

I got me a few female friends myself, gina.

They say they want me to go lingerie shopping with them tomorrow.

Oh, really. Really?

They say they want a man's opinion.

Hey, that's what they say.

You know what? That's too bad, martin.

Because, um, if you go with them,

You won't be able to see me in, um...

These.

Those your red pumps.

The red pumps.

Peace.