06x08 - Supermom Burnout

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[Theme music playing]

Singer: ♪ there's a time for
love and a time for livin' ♪

♪ so take a chance
and face the wind ♪

♪ an open road and
a road that's hidden ♪

♪ a brand-new life
around the bend ♪

♪ there were times ♪

♪ i lost a dream or two ♪

♪ i found the trail ♪

♪ and at the end was you ♪

♪ there's a path you take
and a path not taken ♪

♪ the choice is
up to you, my friend ♪

♪ nights are long,
but you might awaken ♪

♪ to a brand-new life ♪

♪ brand-new life ♪

♪ a brand-new life
around the bend ♪

"But soft,

"What light through
yonder window breaks?

"It is the east,
and juliet is the sun.

"Arise, fair sun...

And k*ll
the envious moon."

Will you can the couplets
and serve the grub?

Coming forthwith,
my lady.

Ah. Pancakes...

And sausage.

What's the matter?
Sausage is no good?

Oh, yeah. Sure, sure.

Sausage. No matter
how often it's served,

Monday through friday,
it's always a treat.

Sausage,
sausage, sausage.

All right. I'm sorry.
I forgot that I promised

To make you
something different.

Let me have that.

How about
sausage patties?

Much better.

Oh, good morning, all.
Good morning, angela.

Tony, what feast
do you have planned

For my client dinner?

Oh, have no fear angela.

I'll think of something
brilliant by friday.

Uh, tony.

The dinner's wednesday.

This wednesday?

Are you sure you told me
this wednesday?

Twice.

Oh, god. I can't get it
together by then.

You know, I have--i have
midterms this whole week

And two on thursday.

Tony, don't worry about it.

If you're under
that kind of pressure,

We'll just have a catered
or make it a buffet.

Oh, angela. I hate buffets,
and I hate catered food.

I hate taking
shortcuts.

I hate sausage.

Let's see. I know what I'll do.

I'll cancel
my dental appointment,

I'll farm out
the laundry,

And I'll postpone that teachers
association meeting.

You're lucky
it's light week you know.

Jonathan, forget it.
I am not driving you to school.

It is too embarrassing.

You think that's embarrassing?
Your head looks like

It's used it to mop up
an oil slick.

Tony: hey. Hey.
Hey. Now. Come on.

Come on. We promised
we were not make fun

Of samantha's
new hair color,

Even though she didn't
clear it with her father

And he has serious
doubts about it,

But he's too big
to mention it.

Well, I'm not.

Why are you embarrassed
to drive him to school?

Because yesterday, when
I drove it to school,

It decided to turn
to nancy and impress her

By drinking cranberry
juice through its nose.

Come on, sam.
That's enough bickering.

I'm sick and tired
of hearing you argue with it.

I--i mean him.

Where did you learn

To drink juice
through your nose?

Grandma.
Wha--

In some cultures,
it is an art.

Come on, slugo.
I'll drive you to school.

Maybe we'll stop
for breakfast.

Hey, hey.
No cranberry juice.

[Snort snort]

Thank you.
Thank you, mother.

At least we don't have
to listen to them

Squabble over
every little thing.

It's not
every little thing.

Just his very
existence.

Oh, like
you're so cool.

Out. Out.

Well, I have to go
decootify my car.

What is going on
between them?

Maybe it's because they go
to the same school this year.

Maybe what we've got here is a
classic case of sibling rivalry.

I don't think so.

Why not?

They're not siblings.

That's true, but, tony,

They live together like they're
brother and sister.

Maybe our irregular relationship
is confusing them.

Our relationship
is not irregular.

Well, maybe we're making
the people around us irregular.

You know what I mean.

I just think we have to do
something about this

Before it really
gets out of hand.

What? Move before they
come home from school?

No. I think samantha
and jonathan

Have to talk to someone.

A professional.

You mean like--
like therapy?

Yes. Yes.
Gee, angela--

Tony, please.
Please, let me finish.

I know what
you're going to say.

You're going to say
that I'm projecting

My compulsive need for therapy,

Which has spanned
the better part of two decades,

Onto the children,
but I sincerly think
that unless--

Angela, please,
please, please. Relax.

I agree with you
on this one.

You do?
Yes.

Well, that is so
enlightened!

Angela, not for nothing,

But you know,
I've widened my horizons

During
my college years.

I'm attuned to the
life of the mind.

I'm a man-child
in the world of ideas.

I'm a pioneer,

Chopping down the forest
of provincial thought.

Pig meat?

What I don't understand
is why I'm here.

Mother, when children
are having a problem,

Often the therapist wants
to see the entire family.

When there's
a problem

With any one member
of the unit,

You must examine the fabric
of the entire patchwork

And slowly restitch
the quilt of love.

What a crock.

I'm not part
of this problem.

You may be,
grandma.

Aw, shut up.

That was a very
productive session.

You really
think so doc?

Absolutely.
In a couple of weeks,

You'll gonna be completely
over that insatiable redhead

Who ruined
your life.

Thanks, doc.

Hi. I'm dr. Berl.
Are we all ready?

Yes. We're very ready.

I think this is going to be
a great experience

For all of us.

Dibs on
the primal scream.

Uh, please
have a seat.

Don't worry.
That's just a couch.

It's not the couch.

Okay. Based on what angela
told me on the phone,

You must be mona,

And samantha,
and jonathan, right?

Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, doc,

But the car got stuck
in the shop

And I had to stop
by the dry cleaners.

Don't worry.
They got that spot out.

Hi, doc. What's up?
Get it? What's up, doc?

You must be tony.

Well, my reputation
precedes me, huh?

Tony, sit down [indistinct]
your brains out.

We're on the meter here.

Oh, yeah.

Tony, don't worry.

That's just a couch,
it's not the couch.
[Chuckles]

What a lame
joke, huh?

Well, why are
you all here?

Dr. Berl, the reason
that we're here

Is because there's some tension
between samantha and jonathan

And we thought
we should talk it out.

As a matter of fact, I have
a masters degree in counseling.

Really?
Hmm.

Well, what do you think
of the situation?

They're all nuts.

See, that's why
I never went for my phd.

You shrinks
have no sense of humor.

Tony: dr. Berl. Dr. Berl.

Jonathan and samantha
are both wonderful loving kids

But it seems to me
that there are some new,

Strange and precious on there
into personal dynamic.

I.e. Psyche 101.

So did i.
Oh.

Dr. Berl, samantha and jonathan

Are in the same school
this year,

And we just thought maybe they
weren't getting enough space.

I spent 20 years
in therapy.

Not consecutively.

That's very interesting.

One of the ways
that we break the ice here

Is we do a little
role-playing.

I mean, that is
if the experts all agree.

Yes, I think
that's great.

Let's try it.

We make up a scene,

And then everyone plays
someone else in the family.

That gives me a very good idea
of how the family operates.

Tony, you really don't need
to take notes.

Oh, I'm not taking notes.

You see, I just remembered
I have to pick up

These garbanzo beans
for this dinner

That angela's throwing,
you know.

And you know, when you got
a million things to do

And something pops
into your mind,

You got to write it down
before it pops right out.

Gee, it popped right out.

Garbanzo beans.

Boy, doc,
you are a good listener.

Tony, why don't we start
the role-playing with you.

Would you do angela,
say, at breakfast this morning?

I'll give it a shot doc.

I'm not sure
I can do it, but...

Good morning, tony. Here's
the menu tonight's dinner.

Guests arrive at 7:06.
Drinks done by 7:10.

Hors d'oeuvres at 7:19.
Dinner served at 8:01.

You must stop
by the dry cleaners

And pick up my dress.
And don't forget

The car service
this afternoon.

Oh, and by the way,
when I was in the sixth grade,

I went to camp
and I lost an earring.

So, if you have a chance
between classes,

Could you drain lake michigan
and see if you can find it.

Thank you. Got to run.

h*. Oh, wow.
That was fun.

Guess I've gotten
a little bossy

Since I took on the henderson
and mitchell account,

But normally, I'm a very
generous and loving employer.

You're not generous
with me

And there's not much
loving for him.

Mona!

Now, who would like to go next?

I want to be sam.

You're mine.

I am so cool.

I am the coolest kid
at fairfield high,

And I'm never driving
you anywhere,

You ugly little toad.

I never
call you ugly.

Oh. So, you don't
think I'm ugly?

Of course I do.

I just never
call you that.

Jonathan,
how do you feel

When samantha won't
drive you to school?

Lousy.
I'm in high school now.

And I want her to start
treating me like an adult.

Then stop using your nose
for a juice dispenser.

Good. Good. Good.

Good. Now we're
getting somewhere.

You know, we're digging--
we're digging down deep.

Oh, I mean,
if you agree, doctor.

You're the--
you're the...doctor.

And then when I was 14,

I realized I was different
from the others.

Angela that's fascinating,
but don't you think

We should get back
to the children?

Oh, the children in my ballet
class were vicious.

But I learned to ignore
their taunts.

Oh, angela. I think he means
these children.

Angela: oh. Oh, of course.

So what I'm hearing
here is

That sometimes, jonathan,
you embarrass samantha.

And sometimes, samantha,
you humiliate jonathan.

Which means that you're behaving
like normal siblings.

Do you mean he's like
a brother to me?

Yep.

That is so gross.

Hey, you should see
my brother.

Well, there is a little more
pressure on both of you,

Because you're
in the same school,

So a period of adjustment
is perfectly natural.

I think angela was right.

Thank you.
Dr. Tromski said

I have a great deal
of psychological insight.

He was our
veterinarian.

And all
your joking around

Is really a wonderful
coping mechanism.

You're obviously
a very loving family.

Well, I try
to set a tone.

Dr. Berl, when do we need
to see you again?

Well, let's let
a little time go by

And see
how things go.

Oh, hey, yo, oh,
hey, dr. Berl,

You are good.
You are good.

It's like mrs. Freud
said to sigmund--

"You ought to raise
your rates."

Hey, right after we leave.

Okay. What do say, g*ng.
Let's go, huh?

Oh, boy. It's 4:00. I still
got time to get to the butcher.

Come one. Oh, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

That can't be right,
because if it's 4:00,

I just missed my history exam.

Tony, it's 4:00.

Angela, how could I have
made an appointment

When I had an exam?
Don't worry about it.

Maybe you can take
a make-up exam.

I have no time
to take make-up exam angela!

What am I gonna do? I--

Dr. Berl: tony, can I see you
for a minute please?

Tony. Based on what
I've seen here,

It seems to me you've got a lot
going on in your life now.

And if you continue
at this pace,

You could burn
yourself out.

If you're so inclined I would
really like to recommend

Continued therapy
for you.

Therapy? Me?

Oh, my god.

I wonder
what's wrong with dad.

Well, you heard dr. Berl.

He said he's overloaded
and overworked.

And underloved.

I know it pushed him
over the edge.

It was the demands
of the resident troll.

I think he lost it
when you were born

And the nurse came out
with an ugly bundle

And said "look what you did".

That is enough.

Did we learn nothing
from our session?

You're right, angela.

We should try to get along
for dad's sake.

Yes. I think we have to create
a happy, loving,

Secure home environment.

We have to show tony that we're
sensitive to his needs.

Hi, g*ng. I'm home.

Hi.
Oh, hi.

All right, guys. Really,
I'm touched. I'm really touched.

Hey, great news. They're gonna
let me take a make-up exam.

Oh.
Oh.

Oh, guys. Really, really.
I'm fine, really.

I'm fine. I'm fine.

No, he's not.

Hey. Need some help.

Hi, angela. Look, uh...

I know why you're here,
and I'm gonna save you

A little time, you know.

I don't think
I'm going back

For any more therapy.

But the other morning
you were all for it.

I know but that was
for the family, you know.

Look, I don't get headaches,
I don't get stomach aches

I don't go to shrinks,
you know.

Tony, when I was a senior
in high school,

I had a very rough time.

I was under a lot of pressure
to get into a good college,

I wasn't dating,
and I had a weight problem.

Oh. So that was the first time
you went to therapy?

No. No. I went to therapy
a year later

When I was a freshman
in college.

Well, what was
your problem then?

I was under a lot of pressure
to get good grades,

Still wasn't dating,

And had an even
bigger weight problem.

So you're telling me
that if I put this off,

I could have
even bigger problems

And possibly
get fat.

Something like that.

Well, look, angela,
I really--

I know therapy's
a wonderful thing

And it does great things
for lots of people,

But to tell you
the truth,

I really can't see myself
sitting in a room

Talking to another person
about me.

Tony, you said
you were open

To new ideas,
new experiences.

Angela, look.
Where I come from,

You work things like this
out for yourself.

I know. I think that
might be the problem.

All right ladies, let's take our
seats please and we'll begin.

Oh.
All right.

Let's see. Last week,
we left off with...

Oh, hi, doc.
Sorry I'm late.

Oh, I'm sorry. Just let me know
when you're finished in here.

No, no, no, no.
You're right on time, tony.

This is the group
I wanted you to join.

Really?
Absolutely.

Have a seat.

Yeah, yeah.

Hi, girls.

Hi.
Hi.

Everyone,
this is tony micelli.

He works as a housekeeper,
he goes to college,

And he's raising
a teenage daughter.

Oh, my.
Oh.

Tony, welcome to my group
for supermom burnout.

Bye, girls.

Tony, wait.
This is a good group for you.

Come on. Who do I look
like here, florence henderson?

No, I don't--i don't think
this is a good group for me.

Why don't you just take a seat
and see how it goes.

You don't have to participate
unless you feel comfortable.

Who knows,
you might surprise yourself

And relate
to what's being said.

I fell like I'm retaining
a ton of water here.

Uh-huh.

Hi. I'm sonja.
Hi.

Homemade cookie?

Well, gee.
Thanks. Thanks.

Mmm. Man, that's
pretty good texture.

What is that?
Is that butter or margarine?

Yogurt.

Wow!

All right.
Let's start with lisa.

How's that job doing
at the law firm lisa?

Great. I got fired.

Oh, really?
Oh, what a shame.

Well, I'll bring
over a casserole.

Oh, you know what?
You know what?

I have a great
tuna noodle recipe.

We'll talk.

No, it's okay.

I've decided to open up
a practice in my house.

This way, I'll get see more
of my husband and kids.

Ah, you're sorting out
your priorities.

Way to go, lisa.

Boy, ed and I had some
fight last night.

Tell us rosie,
what happened.

Okay. Well, after
a long day at work,

I picked up the kids
at the daycare center

Came home,
got yelled at

Because I forgot he was bringing
friends home for dinner.

And his majesty doesn't
like having to order out,

So he just--
he whined. All night.

That sounds
like my husband.

Mine, too.

Well, angela would never do
anything like that.

She's the best husband
a guy could have.

Anyway it wasn't
all bad, actually.

After ed
ate his pizza,

He decided he needed
to work it off,

And we had a terrific
night of sex!

Maybe angela's not the best
husband a guy could have.

Hey, you. New guy.

Housekeeper,
college student,

Husband
named angela--

What's your story?

Well, there's really
not that much to tell.

Uh, I go to college
to improve myself.

I keep house
for a living,

And angela's not my husband.
She's my boss.

Oh!
Oh.

This sounds juicy.

Tony, why don't
you tell everybody

The reason
you came today?

Oh, well, you know,

Between college
and the kids...

And the house--

You're being pulled
in every direction.

Right, right.

And things are slipping
through the cracks.

Exactly!
And you're dreams

Were you're locked
in photo booths.

And all the pictures of you
are overexposed.

And you keep trying
to scream but you can't

Because leprechauns
are dancing on your tongue.

No.

Sonja, that's very interesting.

We will take this up
in your private session.

Tony, one of the things
that everyone here

In common has,

Is difficulty
in saying no.

Tell me about it.

But I say no
all the time.

I mean, when sam wants
extra allowance, I say no.

I mean, when she wants
to break curfew, I say no.

What if she wanted
her blouse ironed?

Well, I'll do that for her.

Or if she needed
to eat late?

I'd whip her something up,
you know.

What if she needed
her skirt hemmed?

I'm good at that.

Tony, you're one of us.

Tony, you're a supermom.

You're a homemaker
spreading herself

Or himself too thin.

Some of us get into it
because we're perfectionists.

Some of us get into it
because we need to be needed.

But the end result
is the same for all of us.

We all risk burning out.

Well, gee, doc,
that's a great speech, really,

But what's the cure?

The cure starts with us.

We have to take time
for ourselves.

It's not our loved ones'
faults we can't say no.

Sometimes a dish
has to go unwashed,

The bed has to go unmade.

Well, gee, doc. I don't know
if I can do that!

Uh-huh.

Yeah. I know exactly
what you're saying.

Sam, I got to use
the phone!

Don't rush me.

My phone calls are just
as important as yours are.

Don't push me,
jonathan--

Hey--
because I will [indistinct]

Your face and--

♪ michael, row
your boat ashore ♪

♪ hallelujah ♪

Hey, g*ng,
what's going on here?

Nothing. We're just enjoying
each other's company.

You know, I may be a little
nuts, but I'm not stupid.

Tony, we're just taking another
load down to the basement.

Oh, come on guys.

You really don't have
to do this.

I had a great session today

And I'm ready to dive
back into life.

Oh, that's wonderful.
Dive into these.

Tony, that's great.
When do you see dr. Berl again?

I don't have to,
angela.

You know, today I feel
like I had a great weight

Lifted off my chest.

You know, I learned
how to say no today.

And I also learned that I have
to take more time for myself.

Hey, but that doesn't mean
that you guys

Can't ask me
to do things for you.

Are you sure,
dad?

Absolutely.

Well, my car could
use a tune-up.

You got it.

And I could use help
with math homework.

Hey, no problemo.

And the dishwasher's stuck
in the rinse cycle.

Do you think
you could check it out?

I'd love to, angela
but no.

You see what I mean is,
I think

We should call a
qualified repairman.

After all,
I do know my limits.

Well--
now, if you don't mind,

I think I'll go
upstairs and relax

In an herbal bath.

Yes, it's "me" time.

You know,
but a repairman.

You know, I mean,
who wants to go for the money?

You know, I could fix it
in a half an hour.

I'll save you a bundle,
all right?

Jonathan,
get your math book.

And, sam, pull the car
out to the driveway.

Mona, your laundry's
like done, baby.

Like done.

And, by the way, while I'm
in here, call dr. Berl.

Tell him I'll be there
next week.

Maybe twice.

Tony: who's the boss
will be back in a moment.

stick around.

Dr. Herbert: this is dr. Herbert
walton with the help line.

is the next caller
there?

you're on the air
live.

Caller sounds like tony:
yeah. I got a problem.

i'm in love with my boss.

see, she and I are
from different worlds.

all though we've become
close friends over
the past few years.

in fact,
even our kids get along.

anyway, I got it bad
for her.

and I don't know what to do.

Oh, tony.

Caller sounds like tony:
what do you think, doc?

do I marry her?
Do I forget about her?

I never listen
to them shows.

Too many weirdos,
you know?

[Theme music playing]