06x22 - Operation Mona

[bunniefuu]

[Theme music playing]

Singer: ♪ there's a time for
love and a time for livin' ♪

♪ so take a chance
and face the wind ♪

♪ an open road and
a road that's hidden ♪

♪ a brand-new life
around the bend ♪

♪ there were times ♪

♪ i lost a dream or two ♪

♪ found the trail ♪

♪ and at the end was you ♪

♪ there's a path you take
and a path not taken ♪

♪ the choice is
up to you, my friend ♪

♪ nights are long
but you might awaken ♪

♪ to a brand-new life ♪

♪ brand-new life ♪

♪ a brand-new life
around the bend ♪

Oh, my god,
what happened?

Is she all right?
I'll take her.

In a pig's eye.

I'm fine where I am.

Don't worry, sir there's
just some smoke damage

In the lady's apartment.
All right. Good.

Now, ma'am,
you got to stop
running back in there.

I can't keep
carrying you out.

Well, you know, mona
when I saw firetrucks,

You have no idea what went
through with my mind.

That there was a fire?

No, that
you volunteered

To be the doll
of the cpr class.

Come on, jim,
let's keep going.

Oh, there's one
that hasn't saved me.

Mona, extinguish it,
please.

Hey, thanks, guys.
Thanks very much.

Oh, firemen.
All right.

Hey, hey, hey,

Watch the soot
there, toots.

What happened?
Is everybody okay?

Yes, yes,
everybody's fine,

Except for a couple
of firemen with hernias.

Well, I started a fire
in the fireplace.

And the room got smoky,
so I left.

It wasn't my fault.

Did you remember
to open the flue?

Okay, so it was
partly my fault.

Hmm, barbeque tonight?

Tony: oh, yes. Yes.

Something cajun,
black in department

Mona's.

Forget to open
the flue again, grandma?

Remember the last time
you made me

Stick my head up there
to see if it was open?

Hey, little butter.

Crisco,
we got you out.

How bad was
this smoke damage?

Well, let's just say

You could cure
a ham in there.

All right.
All right. All right,

Don't worry
about a thing here.

Don't worry about it
a little elbow grease

In my time
life books, huh?

I'll have that place
ship shape in no time.

Well, tony,
since we redoing

The apartment

Maybe we could make
an addition.

Nice choice.
Sure, sure.

Why not? Why not.
What do you want?

Oh, about ten thousand
square feet.

For what?

Room to roam.

I'll take you
to the park.

Okay. Okay.

I'm used
to cramp quarters

No privacy.
No air.

No rent.

Right.

You're right,
I should be grateful

For the little
I have.

Mother, we're going
to fix it up

As best we can.

In the mean time
you'll stay here

Until it's livable.

Livable?

Maybe, for a medium
sized dog.

I mean, that is nerve.

That is really gall.

That is mother.

I know, she's
a pain in the neck

But when I think

Of what could have
happen to her

In the fire,

I--well, I just had
be lost without her.

Oh, yeah. Maybe I'm--i'm being
a little rough on it, huh?

I mean, considering
what she's been through.

Well, just put
yourself in her shoes

She's probably
upstairs right now,

Feeling
very vulnerable.

Mona: angela!

Get your butt up here

And show me where
you keep the upper lady.

♪ da doo doo ♪

Hey mona,

You still
on the couch, mona.

You've been on the couch
for two days, mona.

When are you
going back to work?

I don't feel
so good.

Oh, what's wrong
now, mona?

I just can't eat,

And it hurts
a little here,

And this is
kind of ouchy.

All right. Well, look,
you got to have something.

Look, I wanna make
you some tea.

Can you put it in
the rainbow bright mug.

Oh, but that's mine.
Oh.

All right, but you got
to give it back.

Okay.

Come on, I wish you'd
get better already.

Hi grandma, how you doing?

Not so great.

I lost
all my strength.

Ham and cheese?

The cholesterol
could k*ll you.

Hey.

This is an act of love.

It's an act
all right.

Mona, I thought
you couldn't eat.

Well, I couldn't,

And then I thought
well, yes, I can.

And i--i don't know.
Maybe I'm delirious.

Well, you know
what's good for delirium?

You get yourself up,

You do
your own laundry,

You get dressed
and you're going to work.

Now you're delirious.

Oh, is that ham
from the fridge?

Hmm-hmm.
Oh, no, mona.

This ham
had green spores

Growing
all over it.

Gotcha.

Gotcha, mona.

I got mona.

The sick one loses.

The sick one loses.
The sick one loses.

Tony,

Why are you being so mean
to my mother?

I don't feel so good.

I've got something
that's going to make you

Feel a whole lot
better.

I'm buying you
a condo.

Mother,
you were right.

You need more room,
you need more space.

And I can get you
a beautiful place

With the view
and a convection oven.

Tony: oh, I'd k*ll for
a convection oven.

Yeah, see, nothing's
too good for my mother.

Well, let's see.

I've been thinking
about this for a long time.

And the fire gave me
the perfect opportunity.

Save your money, dear.

Mother. That's very sweet,
but I really want to do this.

May I say something?

This is one
of the most beautiful

Mother/daughter moments
I've ever witnessed.

I may weep.

Here, look at this.

Wait a minute.

Where are the tennis
courts?

They're in the back.

Oh, great.
Now, all night long,

I'll be hearing
thunk, thunk, thunk.

But wait a minute,
wait a minute

What about this unit
it's in the front.

There's no window
in the kitchen.

You've never
been in a kitchen.

Besides, angela look
at the people in the lobby.

They look so fake.

Mother, it's a drawing.

Look at all the amenities
this place has--

It has a sauna,
it has an ocean view.

Look. Look at this
stone fireplace.

A fireplace?

What are you trying
to do k*ll me again?

Why is it?
I--i don't understand.

What, a condo
isn't good enough?

What do you want,
a house?

Like you could afford
the house I want.

You'll take out a loan
and then you'll cut
my salary

And have to pay for it.

Mother, what are you
talking about?

I see the ploy
in this, miss.

You see a ploy?

Yes.

Well, let me tell you
what I see.

I see a woman who almost burns
down her apartment,

Wait, make that
my apartment

Who plays hooky from work,

And then has the gall
to tell me

That she doesn't appreciate

The incredibly generous gift
I am buying for her.

Aw, it's
a tax write-off.

That's it.

I've had it.

You are an ingrate.

May i--may I say something?

This is one
of the ugliest...

Mother/daughter moments
I have ever witnessed.

Wait. Wait, wait.
Wait where you going?

I'm going to the gym.

I suddenly feel the need
for a punching bag.

Hey, yo.

What is
with you, huh?

Something
doesn't add up.

Why are you being
so impossible, mona?

I'm--i'm in pain.

Oh, I know
you're a pain, mona.

I-i need a doctor.

You mean, you're really are
in pain, mona?

Hey, hey, sam?
Sam, get the car.

Okay, okay, come on.

We're going
to the hospital. Come on.

Get the car.
Mona don't feel good.

Hurry up! Hurry up!

Oh, hi, mona.

How do you
feel, huh?

Oh, you look good, mon.
You look good.

And don't worry,
the test results

Gonna be ready
any minute.

Hey, wait a minute.

Where'd you get
this nightgown?

We came here straight
from the doctor's.

I always carry
an extra one in my purse.

You never can tell

When you're going
to want a little...nap.

Yeah, right. Right.

But listen, mone,
everything's going to be fine.

And, by the way, angela
will be here, in a minute.

I tracked her down
at the gym.

Angela who?

Angela your daughter.

You remember here,
she was worried sick.

I have no daughter.

Come on, now, mona.

I'm sorry, we don't have
visiting hours
at the morgue.

Aw, come on.

How you feeling mona,
are you okay?

Hi, I'm
dr. Anderson.

Oh, hi, doc.
Do you have the test results?

Oh, yeah. Mona,
you're gonna live
to be 100.

All right, mona.

That's great.

Another 75 years.

However, you do have
a bad gall bladder

Which is gonna requires
some surgery.

Surgery?

Yeah, but it's a very
common procedure.

I don't want you
to panic.

Oh hey.
Hey, doc, don't you
worry about her.

This is mona.
What are you
kidding me?

She's tough.
She's strong.

She can take it.
Oh, good.

Because it's gonna require
a small incision...

Oh.

Along the rib cage...

Oh.

In order
to remove the organ.

Oh!

Gross. Gross.

But you're going to be okay,
and so are you.

You think so, doc?

I'm feeling
a little flushed.

It's pretty much
what I suspected.

She has all
the classic symptoms
of a bad gall bladder.

What's
a gall bladder?

It's a membranous sac
attached to the liver

That stores excess bile.

Although,
it may be removed

With no adverse effects.

How'd you know that?

I've been around, dad.

Come on, sam, let's check out
the cafeteria.

Okay.

Hey look,
at those blood samples.

Want a v-8?

Oh.

Get out!

Nurse, set up
right over here, okay?

We're gonna
draw some blood.

Why don't you stick around
and lend some moral support,
huh?

No.

I don't want to be
in the way, you know.

Mona.

Tony, is she okay?

Yes, she's fine.

Everything's okay.

She has a bad gall
bladder.
Thank god.

Yes, a little surgery
she'll be good as new.

You got
a second opinion?

Yes, sam agrees
with the diagnosis.

I better go in,
to see her.

Uh, I wouldn't...

The doctor's in there

It's not a good time,
right now.

She'll want to see
her daughter.

Oh, well,
that's another thing.

She has no daughter.

Huh?

She's mad at you.

Well, she has
every right to be.

She was sick,
and I called her an ingrate.

Oh, no, angela,

There's something else
going on here.

She's acting
really weird.

I mean, she's in bed,
right?

And this good-looking
doctor walks in,

And she
does nothing.

Really?
Really.

I'm talking like
a good-looking doctor.

You know what I mean?
Hey, I mean,

If I was--i was a girl,
I'd be all over
this guy. Yes.

Yo, doc,
how you doing?

Mother?

I got here
as quickly as I could.

I just know you'll going
to be okay.

She's must be
drugged, right?

I am not drugged.
I'm ignoring you.

Mother, I'm sorry
I called you an ingrate.

I was just in heat
of the moment

You know
I didn't mean it.

Mother, you can't go
into surgery like this.

Please, would you tell her
she can't go

Into surgery like this.

I'm not telling
this one anything.

She scares me.

Do you remember
what daddy said?

Never go to bed
angry.

Your father also said

Never call your mother
an ingrate.

I said I was sorry.

Robert would never have called
his mother an ingrate,

And she was.

Mom...

Hey, is there a doctor
in the house?

Where'd
you get that?

Well, I bought it
down in the gift shop.

Hold on, hold on.

Uh-oh. Code blue.

Code blue.

Hey, I'm dying in here.

Tony, tony, i, uh...

I think mother wants
to be alone right now.

Of course, if you want me
to stay, I can.

I don't get it. I have never
seen her like this.

I don't get it either.

You know,
this code blue gag

It k*lled them in e.r.

Come on. Uh, I'll buy
you a cup of coffee, huh?

Come on.

Robert: mone.

Mone.

Hey, beautiful,
wake up.

Hi, robert.

Robert.

But you're dead.

Yes, but don't worry.

You're not.

Oh...

I can't believe
it's really you.

Aw, you're still wearing
your wedding ring.

Yes...

But you're not.

Well, it took a long time
for me to take it off.

I know,
and I understand.

Remember what I told
you the night before

I passed on?

I wanted you to go on,
live your life.

You did say that.

And I meant it.

But did
you have to live

Quite so much?

You know I'd give up
all that living

To spend just one
more night with you.

Aw, mone.

I miss you so much.

Same here.

It doesn't
get any easier.

I'm glad
you have angela.

You did a great job
raising her.

Except i, uh...

I don't remember her
as a blonde.

You talk to her.

Oh, I like it.

God, I miss her.

Hey, what's with her
and this tony guy?

I mean, maybe my sense
of time is off

Since I've been dead,
but isn't it taking forever

For these two
to get together?

You talk to her.

You know...

She loves you
very much.

I remember how she
used to follow you

Everywhere you went.

Whatever mommy did,
little angela did.

If you'd dressed up to go
to dinner,

She get dressed up,
too.

Remember the time
she came downstairs

Wearing your bra?

It covered
her entire head.

It still does.

Don't you owe her
an explanation

For the way
you've been behaving?

I don't need
to explain anything.

Mone, give it up.

Don't waste
precious time

Arguing with people
you love.

Life's too short.

Take it from one
who knows.

That tony guy
is quite a catch.

His code blue gag
really broke me up.

Yeah, me, too,

But I wouldn't give him
the satisfaction.

You can still
make me laugh.

Do you have
to go so soon?

I'm with you
all the time.

Catch you later,
beautiful.

Goodbye...

Love.

Mother?

Mother, I've been
here all night.

Now, I know you don't
want to talk to me,

But before you go
into surgery there
is something that--

Angela, sit down.

There's something
I've got to tell you.

I don't know
how to begin.

The day you were born

Was the happiest day
of my life.

It was?

Sure. I lost...


In one day.

I think I need
some new material.

Well, yeah.

Anyway...

The day you were born

Was the best day
of my life.

Robert and I had
the most beautiful
little baby girl

The whole world
had ever seen.

A little angel in diapers.

And we wanted to have

Five more little angels

Just like you.

Only...

That wasn't to be.

See, a few months later,
I got sick,

And there were
complications.

And the doctors
told me that i...

I couldn't have any
more children.

Why didn't you
ever tell me before?

I never told anybody.

Mother,
I am so sorry.

No.

No, don't be.

I had
a wonderful husband,

And I had one
beautiful little girl.

I was so lucky.

No.

No, mother. I was
the one who was lucky.

I had a mother who
was fun

And beautiful

And a true
free spirit.

Do you know
that you taught me

How to enjoy life?

You taught me
how to laugh at myself.

You've seen me
through acne

And obesity
and divorce.

And that was
just one year.

I guess what i--what I'm
trying to say is that...

I'm surprised I haven't
pushed you away

By needing you so much.

Angela...

You've got it backwards.

What?

Why do you think I work
in your office?

Because
it's a cushy job.

No.

Why do you think
I live over your garage?

Because you love
tony's cooking.

No.

Why do you think

I used to visit you
so often in college?

In the hopes of catching
me with a boy in my room.

So you got
one out of three.

Angela,

I did all that

Just so I could be near
my little girl.

So, that's why
this--this condo business

Rattled me.

Did you think I was
pushing you away?

I got scared,
and I overreacted...

Yes.

I thought you were
trying to get rid of me.

Mother, I don't want you
moving to a condo

Or a house

Or anywhere else.

I want you
living right next to me

For as long
as you want to.

I want to.

Okay, let's have a look
at that gallstone.

What does it take

To get a laugh
out of you, people?

All right, that's it.

That's it, sam

Get me the nurse's outfit.

I'll show you.

Tony: who's the boss?
will be back in a moment.
Stick around.

Hello, there mona,

How's my favorite
patient?

Terrific.
The surgery was nothing.

All they did was--

Oh, I'm sorry.

I forget how squeamish
some of us can be.

Oh, pish-posh, mona.

There's nothing you could
say that could bother me.

Oh, good.
Because I was just thinking

About my stitches,

Which weren't very many,
really,

Considering they had to
yank a big,

Mushy disease
gall bladder out of me.

See, I know what
you're doing, mona.

And it's not working.

Have you ever seen
your gall bladder, tony?

I got to see mine.

Do you know you can hold it
in your hand and jiggle it.

Yeah?

Sort of like
this jell-o, huh?

Yeah.

Only it's browner
and slimier

And has green glop.

[Music playing]

[Theme music playing]