04x20 - Where the Party At

[bunniefuu]

That's game.

That's game.

Four in a row.

We're on a roll. h* h*...

I thought you had the big joker.

If you were watching the board,

You would have seen I didn't have the big joker.

I could have played this game by myself.

Ladies, ladies, come on, now.

Ladies, get it together, girls.

You have all this weekend

To get your respect back.

Shut up, tommy.

I don't know about this weekend.

I'm gonna be a little busy.

Saturday's a very important day

For a man named martin.

Word...

Now, that brother is large, o.k.?

Martin luther king got two birthdays.

Not martin luther king, man.

Martin "loser" payne.

Tomorrow's martin's birthday.

Oh, martin, man I forgot all about your birthday.

So what you going to get into there?

I have something special planned,

Just me and martin,

A nice quiet candlelight dinner at home.

Damn that, baby.

We'll do that onyourbirthday.

This is marty mar's birthday.

We going all out.

O.k. What do you have planned, baby?

Y'all could hook a brother up with a surprise party,

But don't tell me about it,

'Cause then it won't be a surprise.

Surprise party?

Man, please, you better go to macdonald's play land

And call it a day.

Giddy-up, charles.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I wasn't even talking to you, mariah scary.

Stop calling me names.

Pam...

Martin...

Baby,

Look, about this party,

You should have told me earlier, honey.

It's hard to plan a surprise party on short notice.

Short notice.

That's the only notice martin can give.

Ha ha ha!

Short. Did you get it?

That was funny.

You a wild girl. You a wild girl.

Ha...ahh...

You could come, too, pam.

Why not invite noah

And some of your four-legged friends from the ark?

Whwh

♪ Martin ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Ooh, yeah, yeawhazzup!♪

♪ I'm the man ♪

Tin ♪♪

[Gina] the sodas... What am I forgetting?

[Knock on door]

Coming.

Hey, y'all.

Gina, we're here. What's the emergency?

I mean, this better be important.

We were about to watch a bootleg copy oftoy story.

There's no emergency, guys.

I'm throwing the surprise birthday party for martin

On saturday night.

S-saturday night, gina?

I won't be able to make it, gina.

I'm playing bingo over at nipsey's.

Yeah. I'll be busy, too.

I don't know what it is,

But something will come up.

Quit playin', y'all. Stop!

Look, tommy, pick up two shrimp platters.

Cole, get the cake.

I'll get the hot wings.

I don't think you heard me.

We're not going to make it.

Look, gina, no offense to you,

But, uh...

We just ain't trying to be down with martin no more.

Wait, wait. Hold on, y'all.

You guys are his best friends.

I'm throwing this party for him,

And you're trying to tell me that you're not down?

Tell her.

She's not comprehending.

I know the head's big...

What?

Sit down. Sit down. Sit down.

What is going on?

Gina, we've been talking about this for a while.

Martin is always insulting us.

Word. You know, he--he--

He always messin' with me, man.

He always fightin' tommy.

We tired of it.

It's all right

What? Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Martin is not like that.

Y'all are buggin'.

Think about it.

Clean off the table.

Keep your hair net on.

I don't want no head chips in the food.

How you gonna play me, head sanford?

The brother with the christmas ornament head,

That's my boy, tommy.

That's very funny, heady murphy.

Hold on, montel.

Don't come up here bum-rushin' my lady.

Same for the horse you rode in on.

What meeting you mean?

The meeting between my foot and your a*s.

You and that spoon!

O.k.

O.k.

O.k., Martin! Come on!

It's all right! It's all right!

Oh, come on.

You guys are overreacting.

Martin, that's just the way he is.

Well, it still ain't right.

That's right, gina.

We ain't havin' it.

No more.

I don't believe this.

Hey.

What's up, boo?

What's happenin', tommy?

Hey.

Cole.

Hey.

I'm surprised to see y'all here.

Look, y'all go right ahead

With your planning, all right?

I be in the bedroom,

'Cause I ain't heard nothing.

Hey, gina,

Do us a favor?

Tell him happy birthday

'Cause we ain't gonna make it.

Let us know how the party turns out.

Just go, o.k.? Just, please, just go.

We don't need you.

Martin has plenty of friends.

Smart ones...

With hair.

Now, beat it.

Thick-a*s dumb and dumber.

That's all right.

I'm going to the barber shop

And invite martin's real friends.

Martin, baby,

I'm making a run, o.k.?

Oh, yeah, yeah. Go--go ahead, baby.

And, look, just so you know,

I'm allergic to coconut cake.

Look who's here, guys.

Martin payne's wife gina.

Hi, guys. Hey. Hey.

Did you say martin?

Don't go there.

Saying that name up in here will get you cut.

Ha ha ha... Ha ha ha...

Y'all are crazy.

Look, um, I know it's the last minute and everything,

But I wanted to invite everyone

To martin's surprise party tomorrow night.

Surprise party?

Please.

We're still waitin' on an invite to y'all's wedding.

What?

Wait, wait, whoa.

First tommy and cole,

Now y'all?

To be honest, gina,

Everybody in here knows martin's rude.

And he don't tip.

He's always throwing somebody out.

And he don't tip.

And he don't tip.

Now, frankly,

Everybody's had it up to here

With your martin payne-in-the-a*s.

Uh, think about it.

Now, don't you feel tough?

Yeah! Yeah!

Don't you feel strong? Yeah!

Don't you feel like going home? Yeah!

Then get the hell out of my apartment.

Usually when I throw a man out of my house,

I tell him, "get to steppin'."

But you're a rev. I don't disrespect y'all.

So, please, let me say a prayer.

All right.

Please help the rev to get home safe.

And do not let the doorknob hit 'em

Where you sho' nuff split 'em.

Amen.

Get out my ignorant house.

Go on! Get to waddlin'!

On behalf of marty mar's meat loaf and waffle,

Get out!

Out of my house! Get out!

Don't be like that!

Out! Out! Get out!

Throw y'all asses out the car.

You know I ain't. Roll out.

That's right.

Get out.

This cat's no longer your ride.

That's who I am. I throw people out.

Besides, gina, we're all busy.

Sorry we can't make it.

He's been coming here since he was little.

Yeah. And he's been rude since he was little.

And like I said before,

He don't tip.

Well, fine.

Martin and I will just have

A small little party by ourselves, thanks.

Thanks a lot, guys.

Well, thanks. Thanks a lot.

Well, you don't know him like I do.

Pam, I can't find anybody to come to martin's party.

Yeah. This is really going to break his little heart.

I never thought I'd be saying this,

But other than me, you're martin's only friend.

Not exactly.

See, I won't be at the party, either.

What?

What are you talking about?

O.k., O.k., Sure, pam, sure,

He dogs you a little, but it's not that bad.

He's both.

He's little, and he's bad.

Gina, think about it.

Is that your breath...

Smellin' like boiled baloney?

Pam, I got a problem

With your breath smellin' like train smoke.

Girl, your hair's so nappy,

Wilson couldn't pick it.

Just you, me, tommy, and marmaduke.

And he's so nice to that pam.

Martin told me on the way over

That she was raised by wolves.

Ohh, yes!

Aah!

Pam, pam, my pillow!

Pam!

Wait. Oh, my--

Oh, she's going crazy!

Don't, pam!

Pam, pam, bring it down.

Bring it down, girl. Bring it down.

Help me bring it down.

I'm gonna be real with you.

Martin has no friends!

Cancel that party.

You might as well take him to nipsey's to play bingo.

I'm out!

Well, forget you, girl.

That's all right, 'cause martin don't need y'all.

He's got plenty of other friends!

My baby ain't got no friends.

All right, remember, act surprised,

But be cool at the same time.

What a surpr--

Surprise!

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

All right, gina,

The joke's over.

Where's the party at, gina?

This is the party, baby.

It's just you and me-- an intimate party for two.

I know people are here somewhere.

Stop playing games, now.

Where they at?

Where are the people?

All right, all right, martin, look...

I invited some of your so-called friends,

And everybody said they were too busy to come.

Too busy, gina?

Baby...

Baby... Baby, you o.k.?

Wh-who me?

No, I'm cool. I ain't upset.

I didn't want no party anyway.

We can have our own party right here, baby.

That's right, gina. You know what?

You're right, baby.

We got each other.

That's the spirit. That's my baby.

Let's get this party started right, martin.

[Dance music plays]

Hey!

Hey!

h*!

Come on, baby, work it out.

Work it out. Work it out. Haa...

h*!

h*!

h*!

I'm gettin' on! I'm gettin' on!

I'm gettin' on! Whoo! Whoo!

h*! Whoo!

Damn this, gina, o.k.?

I can't front.

How come nobody came, not even tommy and cole?

And they supposed to be my boys, gina.

They--look, tommy and cole said that you were buggin',

And they said that they weren't down for you anymore.

Well, what about everybody else?

Everybody else?

Um, they--everybody else is down at nipsey's...

Playin' bingo.

Ain't this a b*tch?

I know.

You saying people don't like me no more?

What about all the good things I do for people?

What good things?

You tryin' to be funny, ain't you?

I'm always doing good things for people, gina.

Think about it.

O.k.

I can't believe you bought some sleazy--

Ohh!

Oh!

Oh!

A footstool! Oh, martin!

Yeah. You are all mine!

Say I'm the man.

You the man.

You the man, baby.

That's right.

All right, here...

Clear.

Do it again. Do it again.

Santa, do you know every boy and girl's name?

I sure do.

Then what's my name?

Hold on.

You are...water-head. Now, shut up.

Coming soon. I--i--

Ice for your mouth?

Mouth? O.k.

The mouth is dry?

O.k., Fine.

[Screaming]

Martin!

Mar!

It's coming! It's coming!

Aah!

This is great, martin.

Oh, give me love.

Ah, man...

Oh, man...

Listen, man, I'm sorry

I ain't took your hat off in there.

"Sam I am."

"I do like green eggs

And ham."

Look at 'em, baby.

They asleep...

Lookin' like a fake-a*s j.j. And michael.

Baby, this is from the heart.

Gina...

Will you marry me?

Yes, martin. Yes.

You know, martin, you're right.

Your friends don't appreciate you.

Baby...

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

You're damn right.

Let's go on down to nipsey and play some bingo.

Yeah, let's do that.

They're gonna mess withmybaby.

They want to mess around, do they?

Oh, they got to--

W-walk, boy. You better walk.

That's right, gina.

They might not have a surprise party for me,

But I got a surprise for them.

Payback time.

I'm with you, baby.

Listen up...

Surprise! Surprise!

Aw, damn.

Man, we knew how badly you wanted a surprise party.

We been working on this six months now.

Since right after your last birthday.

For a little man, you talk a lot of trash,

But your heart's there somewhere.

Happy birthday, small newman.

That's not all. That's not all.

Between all your friends and all my connections from my job,

See, we had some people who couldn't be here,

But they had some special things to say.

Go ahead, nipsey. Hit it.

Hey, martin.

Don't be mad, I sneaked in your house.

I know you ain't here.

Now, I know it's your birthday,

I wanted to bring you a little some-something.

It's something really special,

So I want you to open it up,

Then call me and tell me what you think.

I wrapped it, made it nice,

So happy birthday, boy.

Bye-bye.

Hey!

Whazzup. I'm chris rock.

I'd like to wish martin payne

A very, very happy birthday.

Oh, we gonna have a party.

Right on. Right on.

I'm donnie simpson.

I want to wish my homeboy from detroit--martin--

A happy birthday.

Many more.

Yo, martin, happy birthday, man.

Sorry you weren't here when I was,

But I'll get with ya.

Hi, martin. This is johnnie cochran.

I took time from my busy schedule

To wish you a happy birthday.

I'm sending you a present...

And, of course, a bill.

Whazzup?

You thought we forgot about you.

Happy birthday, martin.

Gina's a good girl. Keep an eye on her.

Hey, martin,

Happy birthday

From salt...

Pepa...

And spin.

Martin, happy birthday, bruh.

Yo, whazzup, man? Sorry I couldn't make your party.

Happy birthday and all that.

Get your groove on one time for me.

Baby, come here. Don't cry.

There we go, martin!

Martin!

Whoo!

Marty mar!

Speech!

Speech!

Speech!

Shh!

Just give me a minute, y'all.

Th-th-that was the b*mb, y'all.

The b*mb.

Martin, on behalf of nipsey's and all your frien

Happy birthday.

Happy birthday, martin!

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Whoa, lord ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to martin ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Everybody ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday, dear martin... ♪♪