09x21 - Taming Of The Woo Woo

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

[Jamie] This is the true story...

[Matt] ...of seven strangers...

[Melissa] ...picked to live in a mansion...

[Kelley] ...work together...

[Danny] ...and have their lives taped.

[David] To find out what happens...

[Julie] ...when people stop being polite...

[Jamie] ...and start getting real.

-The Real World.
-[Julie] ...New Orleans!

[theme music concludes]

[Julie] I got in a big argument

with David yesterday
and I haven't talked to him since.

-[Melissa] Really?
-[Matt] Shut up. She did.

[Melissa] Somebody give me the details.
Where was I?

He said something
about how people resent him

because he does everything phenomenally

and he's so good at everything
that people resent him for that.

And I'm like, "Dude, I resent you
because you're arrogant as hell."

"That's why I do not like
to be around you all the time."

Then we went off from there.
It was not pretty.

Go, girl, stand up for yourself.

-Yeah, but...
-See Julie is practicing some empowerment.

You have to get down
on David's level to make him understand

it takes time, effort, and ba*ls, people.

Anytime you throw
your fists up to David,

he's gonna throw his up stronger,
and he won't listen to anything you say.

[Julie] But David
is not necessarily stronger.

In that conversation, I walked away

feeling like I had made a point
and he had not.

I don't like someone being singled out.
I don't like to hear "the six of us"

and that inferring
that David's the odd man out.

Well, he has got to learn
that he cannot always function that way

because no one's gonna like him.

[pensive music playing]

I don't really get support,
you know, from nobody for what I do.

[indistinct chatter]

I mean, I'm an extremist.
I wanna take everything to the next level

but I get no support.

-I can...
-[Deanna] You get no support from who?

-The house members?
-Nobody.

The roommate thing ain't happening.
You know what I'm saying?

That they wanna hate
for whatever reason they wanna hate.

They wanna not support me
for whatever reason,

they wanna not support me.
Fine, no problem, I move on from that.

If I get no support
don't expect me to give a [bleep]

about what you feel
and how... even care about you

if you don't wanna
give me support. Forget it.

[Deanna] So, in other words,
you're saying that

since they're not gonna
support you or whatever

in what you wanna do,

then you're not gonna care
about how they feel, right?

If you don't wanna support me,
you don't wanna clap for me

then I'm gonna stand up
and clap for myself.

That's what I'm gonna do.
That's what I gotta do.

That's what everybody has to do.
I'm just hated. I'm hated.

[pensive music concluding]

[David] ♪ It's a quarter past forever ♪

♪ Seems our world nearly flew on by... ♪

[David] I've been blessed
to be able to sing.

Can you start over
at the second verse?

I truly do not have money.
I don't even have a credit card.

You know what I'm saying?
I don't have anything.

Take it back a few more...

[David] When you see me
off and grooving with my headphones on

and it seems like the whole world
is cut off from me.

It's not that I'm hating the world,

it's that I'm trying to make
a dollar out of 15 cents

and I'm trying to make sure

that when I leave here
that I do not regret a single day.

[upbeat music playing]

So, why don't you give me the dirt?

-Tell me who you're dating.
-I'm not dating anybody.

-You're not dating anybody?
-[Julie] No.

[hairdresser] Okay, who do you like?
Who are you courting?

That's a Southern thing.
Who are you courting?

-[chuckles] I'm not courting anybody.
-[hairdresser] Who's courting you?

I don't know.

You just don't go kissing everybody,
but you also don't go kissing no one.

It's like art. You exercise it.

She said Matt wouldn't kiss her
if her life depended on it.

I said, "He's stupid."

You know, I live for that feeling
that I had the moment I met Matt.

The moment I saw him walk into our house.

The way my heart jumped
when I saw him. That's what I live for.

He won't kiss. He doesn't kiss.

-Oh, wh... How old is he?
-[Kelley] Twenty-two.

-Something's wrong with him.
-[Julie] He says he wants

the next girl he kissed to be the girl
he marries. That's what he says.

That's why he's afraid to kiss you. Hello.

Matthew needs to understand
that he needs to exercise his mouth.

He has beautiful lips.
Absolutely gorgeous.

And there's no reason
why he shouldn't be... [laughs]

Literally, if I touch his body,

all of his muscles tense up
and he starts shaking.

[Kelley] Maybe all of his muscles
are getting tensed up,

-and that's why he's...
-[hairdresser] Exactly!

That's what I'm saying.

-Maybe you touched a muscle, girl.
-[laughs]

-That no other girl has ever touched.
-[laughs]

[hairdresser] You touched
his love muscle, girl.

[upbeat music playing]

[Julie] I meet Jacob
at my brother's concert

and we hang out.

Hey, this is Jacob.
How was dinner? Was it good?

-[Melissa] It was so cute.
-[Julie] Really?

-That's cool.
-You need to speak up, punk-a*s.

-[Julie chuckling] Cool.
-Don't kick me.

-I can't hear anything he says.
-I told him, he's an [bleep].

-[Jacob] Who, me?
-[Matt] Yeah, speak up.

I can't believe you're being
a jerk to my guest.

[Matt] I'm not being a jerk.

If I didn't like the kid,
then I wouldn't ask him to speak up.

I wouldn't have cared
or give a [bleep] what he had to say.

[Julie] He's gotta make

these little rude remarks
under his breath,

make Jacob feel uncomfortable,
make me feel uncomfortable.

[Julie chuckling]

They're such nerds. I'm not kidding.

Matt gets so friggin' pissed off
every time I have a friend.

-I'm not kidding.
-[Jacob] Maybe he likes you.

-What'd you say?
-Maybe he likes you.

That was so not
how it was supposed to happen.

I sincerely wanted to talk
to the kid, you know?

So then she had to go and get defensive

and then I look like the jealous boyfriend
and that's not even the case.

[chuckles] Well, he's cute.

-He's also, like...
-Twelve.

[lively music playing]

[Jacob] Is that a full moon?

[Julie] Actually, yeah.
It looks pretty cool.

Hmm. [chuckles]

[chuckles]

[lively music concluding]

-[crickets chirping]
-[upbeat music playing]

So, there's a tentative hot tub party
with a bunch of strippers.

-I'm just letting you know.
-Nice.

Something that I want to be around for.

[David] We're gonna
have a hot tub little gathering.

It's gonna be tight, and of course,
everybody's gonna be taking off

their clothes 'cause that's what
they do for a living, and um,

I'm gonna be butt naked, hopefully.

[tense music playing]

[Julie] David decides he's going
to have a bunch of strippers over.

This is like The Belfort Brothel
and I can't deal with it.

I just can't deal.

I am sick of always being
the last one to know about everything.

You understand how this happens
all the time?

I just found out about it last night
because he asked me...

[Jamie] Hey, Julie,
what you don't understand is,

you'll be the first one
to know about things

if I wanna go pick flowers
and skateboard in the park.

But with wet T-shirt contests
and strippers in Jacuzzis...

I want to voice my concern
about not wanting it to happen in my home.

[Melissa] I just heard
about it last night.

-[Jamie] It's not a...
-That whole having sex in the hot tub,

I think that should be an issue, too.
I get in that hot tub, also.

Spermies cannot live
in the water. [chuckles]

-[Julie] Listen!
-I don't care. Herpes does.

-No, this cannot happen.
-[Jamie] There's gonna be so much

boodisie juice in that Jacuzzi when...

[all groan, laugh]

♪ Boodisie
Boo-boo-boodisie ♪

[upbeat music playing]

[indistinct chatter]

[David] Oh, yes, everyone smile.

I am still planning a hot tub party,
and it will be off the hook.

[indistinct chatter]

[David] I've got strippers coming
from three different places

and you know
they're just gonna take it off.

The house is gonna be straight bumping.
You're not gonna want to miss this.

[Kelley] This is just a madhouse.
I've got to go.

[Melissa] I want to go!

The hoochies will come in,
the bouncers will be in here

and it will be a very sleazy,
dirty, rap video.

I'm not down for the stripper party.

I am down for a party but if it's gonna
be a self-promotional party

where the focus is on having a bunch
of stripper chicks around you,

making you look like
you're some "cool god" or something,

then I don't want
anything to do with that.

[upbeat music concluding]

I just don't understand
this necessity to be Mr. Bling-Bling.

♪ I make your head hurt ♪

♪ Make your temples bang
From the side like that long ♪

♪ Try being deeply
Burned up in that bond... ♪

[all laugh]

-[indistinct chatter]
-[mellow hip-hop music playing]

[Matt] So, tell me more about this kid.
How old is he?

[Julie] He just graduated.

-How old is Brandi?
-[Matt] Eighteen.

-[Julie] Yeah, he... I mean...
-Going on 19.

-She's, like, 18 and three-quarters.
-[Julie] Yeah, I think he is, too.

[Matt] No, he's not.
He probably has just turned 18.

[chuckles] What is your problem?
Matt, seriously?

Do you even recognize
how rude you were

-when he came in?
-[Matt] No. I... When he... [clears throat]

I recognize
it could've been interpreted as rude

but honestly, I call my friends back home
"punk-a*s" and "gutter punk" all the time.

We cannot communicate
past the third-grade level. We cannot.

I'm writing a letter to Matt
because he asks me

why we have issues
and I'm sick of talking about it,

so I think that if I write it down
in word form,

then maybe we can just be done with this

-and get some closure.
-[tense music playing]

[Julie] "Matt,
after we talked the other night,

it became clear to me why I don't love
to be around you all the time."

"What it boils down to is this,

I genuinely do not feel better
about myself when I'm around you."

I'm thinking,

"Okay, this is either gonna make
things better or a whole lot worse."

-[mellow music playing]
-[indistinct chatter]

I thought Julie
was my best friend in the house.

And before you know it,

I found out she's been pissed at me
for the past three weeks.

[Melissa] I used to not believe the theory
that you're oblivious to things,

but Matt seriously has no idea
when he has pissed her off.

I just wanna talk about something new.

-[Mellissa laughing]
-She admits that she...

[Melissa laughing] You're such a boy.
You are such a boy.

"I'm tired of talking
about feelings." [laughs]

"I just wanna change the subject."

Seriously, this is how girls operate,
and I am one of them, so I know.

-[Matt] All right.
-We fixate until it's absolutely fixed

or till we realize
it can't be fixed anymore,

and when we realize
it can't be fixed anymore,

we still think about it internally.

[Julie] Do you have any deodorant
I can borrow?

-[Melissa] Speak of the devil.
-[Julie] What are you guys doing?

Talking about deodorant?

-[Matt] No.
-[Melissa] No, talking about the person

-that just put the deodorant on.
-Talking about me?

[Melissa] Matt wanted to know from me

whether or not you guys
had a communication problem.

-[Julie scoffing] Okay.
-[Melissa] So...

Matt truly and genuinely wants to fix it,

and Julie swears to God
that she doesn't care.

I wrote you a nice little letter
and I was gonna give it to you

and let you read it
and then be done with it all.

-[Matt] All right.
-[Julie] Okay?

This is how I feel like I am, okay?
This is Matt, okay?

♪ Doot-de-doo, de-doo ♪

Matt's just doing his own thing.

-[Melissa chuckling]
-Till Julie comes in and I'm like,

-"What, what, what'd you say?"
-[Melissa laughing]

"What? I'm trying to be nice."

"I'm trying to pay attention.
I don't understand."

Then she's like,

"Matt, you just don't understand."
[groans]

-Then she runs out of the room...
-[Melissa laughing]

Then she runs out of the room
and I'm like...

That's how it happens.

[pleasant music concluding]

[sentimental music playing]

[Julie] It's right here. [chuckles]

I'm gonna try and communicate
the way he communicates,

which is much more organized.

And I think that, through a letter,
maybe that'll be more effective.

[emotional music playing]

[Julie] "You ask me
what it is about you that I dislike."

"I hate how you often criticize
and reprimand me."

"You're obsessed with your image
that you often speak to me like a child."

"You're very critical.
I hate your arrogance."

"This is why I have a hard time
getting along with you, Matt."

[tense music playing]

I'm not sure if Matt's gonna
be really defensive

and offended by my letter

or if he's going to be cool
and wanna talk about it.

[phone line ringing]

-[David's mom] Hello?
-Hey.

-[David's mom] Hey, you.
-What you doing at home?

[David's mom] Oh, nothing much.
Chilling at home.

So what's up, sweetie?

-I'm going to the studio today.
-[David's mom] Oh!

They wanna put together
a compilation of new artists.

I'm working with the studio
to give four or five of my songs.

-We'll send them to New York and, uh...
-[David's mom] Woah! Mm-hmm.

-...see what happens, but...
-[David's mom] You go, boy. You can do it.

I don't want to live
like we live no more.

-You know what I'm saying?
-[David's mom] But baby,

you've been there. I'm all good.

-You're not all good till I'm all good.
-[sentimental music playing]

They say, "Money can't buy love."

"Money can't buy happiness."
Well, right now,

it's making us pretty miserable
because of what we don't have.

It's just you and me.

It's just you and me.

[sentimental music concluding]

[vacuum whirring]

[rock music playing]

[Matt] We're doing the house cleanup.

What section do you have?

-[David] The living room.
-[Matt] All right.

[Danny] Don't even talk about that toilet.

I know, but, you know, since...
[groans] Since...

[groans, chuckles]

[Danny] Is everybody cleaning?

Everybody except David.
David's in his zone.

[Danny] That's complete bull-[bleep].

[Kelley] I thought everybody
was gonna clean.

I don't have the patience
for somebody that's got such an attitude.

[Danny] Hey, Dave?

Dave? Can you help us clean?

Yeah, I'm doing this.
This is my area, right here.

[Danny] All right.
I can't deal with you anymore.

[Matt] I know you'll end up cleaning.

-I know that.
-Right.

[Matt] It would be tight
if you could do it with us.

-It'd be, like, a team thing.
-[David] A team thing.

Let's clean at the same time.
What purpose is that?

They know I have a big night tonight.

They know I wanna try
to get these lyrics in.

[Jamie] Dave, what area of the house
are you cleaning up?

The living room, for the fifth time.

[Matt] I don't want him
to be the disliked one in the house.

I can see so much in him
and I don't want him to be in that corner.

How are things going?

[David] Hopefully,
the future's looking bright.

So what's your plan
for the rest of the day?

Going to the studio.

I decide I wanna go, too.

So what time
do you all start in the studio?

I wanna show support for him.

When it comes time to leave,

I come downstairs and look out the door
and the car is gone.

David left me.

[rock music playing]

-[Matt] So, how was the studio?
-Very good. Sweat mad lyrics.

-Mad lyrics.
-[Matt] Why'd you leave me?

-[David] Leave you where?
-[Matt] Here. I wanted to chill with you.

I wanted to hang out.

I wanted to see your form
of creative expression.

I asked all kinds of questions
about what's going down,

and I go upstairs for, like, ten seconds
and then you're gone.

[David] I don't feel like having
a weird vibe up in the studio.

[Matt] I said that I wanted to go, right?

I've given myself to David

in a way that no one else
in the house has,

and I get outright dissed.

-It's... Whatever, dude. Whatever.
-[rock music concluding]

David is this one element, this, like,
cavity, this decay in our house.

[dramatic music playing]

[Matt] This was the first time
I've just been straight-up dissed.

Just straight-up, like, hand in the face.

Friendship requires... reciprocation.

He has no respect for you.

He can't look you in the face
when you're talking to him.

What's happening here is, Matt's like,
"Wow, David, you're really cool."

"Wow, David, you're really talented.
Wow, David, let's work on this together."

Yahooey-kablooey! And then David's like...

[clicks tongue]
"Play on, player. Who dis?" [scoffs]

I'm trying to help a friend
through problems that he has,

that have been embedded
in him over 20 years

from a lot of [bleep]
that's happened to him

that none of us have had to go through.

But a lot of us went through
a lot of [bleep] before we came here

and we don't have to act like that.

I cannot wait for the lesson
to be learned.

I really, really can't. If he wants
to learn the hard [bleep] way

by being the angry Black man,
then go ahead.

[Matt] David is not
what every Black man is.

David is David.

[Melissa] He so needs someone
to tell him he's a jackass.

[Jamie] David is an [bleep]
to all of us, you know?

That's the reality of the situation.

What the six of us have to say to him,
he needs to hear,

and although it's painful right now
and it hurts today, it's for the best.

I think the house is about to explode
and David is going to be the target.

[Jamie] Okay, um...

Thanks, everybody, for coming.

Basically, I called this house meeting,
sort of in the advent of our departure

from... [smacks lips]
...the Belfort house and New Orleans.

I want us all to leave here
with no regrets

and sort of, just, simply, better people
from when we got here in January.

-Saying that, uh...
-[intense music playing]

...this is not a meeting about dirty dishes,

it's not a meeting about NOATV,
parking tickets, any of that.

This is a meeting
about openness, sincerity,

the pursuit of growth, and...

about why, David, you are an [bleep]
to each and every one of us in the house.

[intense music concluding]

David feels as though
he has become alienated in this group,

and nobody really
wants to go out of their way

to give him a hand,
and I will say I really don't, either.

Key words with David would be...

immature and disrespectful.

I just don't give a damn about David,
to tell you the truth.

If you would just shed this [bleep] ego,
this defense system, these muscles,

this is all a facade.

We cannot equate Blackness
with jackass-ness, we can't.

But we can equate David
with jackass. [sighs]

The drama is so fun.
We'll see what happens.