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17x24 - Svetlana's Birthday

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "The Real World". Aired: May 21, 1992 – August 29, 2019.*
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Seven to eight young adults are picked to temporarily live in a new city together in one residence while being filmed non-stop.

17x24 - Svetlana's Birthday

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on

The real world...

I think we should start

Thinking about fantasy fest.

I've heard that next to

Mardi gras, it's, like,

The biggest party...

Yes.

In the united states.

Fantasy fest is basically

What key west is known for.

This is perfect, dude.

Getting to put on, like,

Ten costumes for fantasy fest

Is so great to me.

I want to be this.

Why couldn't this have

Happened on a different weekend,

You know?

Well, hurricane wilma just blew

Through town.

It totally decimated our city,

But I don't think me, the rest

Of the roommates, or for

The rest of key west is gonna

Let, you know, a little

Hurricane stand in the way of

Us, you know, having one last

Final bash before we leave

This beautiful place.

This is the true story...

Gorgeous, man.

Of seven strangers...

[Laughs]

Picked to live in a house...

Work together and have

Their lives taped.

Whoa!

Find out what happens...

[Gasps]

When people stop

Being polite...

And start getting real.

All:the real world:

Key west.

So they're gonna walk in.

Turn the fog on.

It's gonna fog the booth up.

Lights, the whole nine, right?

I got you.

And then out is gonna pop me

And, I think, paula bronzed

Head to toe, and we come out.

We're all jumping around, like,

All crazy and sh**ting

Streamers, you know?

Yeah.

I have been waiting for fantasy

Fest for a long time.

It's like mardi gras.

You've got people in costumes,

Beads.

All the restaurants in key west

Have different themed parties

Every night.

We're gonna do it once

Per block.

The parade lasts three hours.

Okay.

The pinnacle of the fantasy

Fest experience is the parade

That takes place on

The last day.

This booth takes up about this

Much of the float.

It's not gonna be all covered

With vegetation, but, like,

Mainly just on the corners

Are, like, big tufts.

This float has really--

Has really gotten me excited.

Janelle's gonna be the queen

Fairy or whatever, and she's

Just gonna sit up at the front

Of the thing and do stuff

And look beautiful.

So tyler--what is tyler

Wearing?

Tyler, what are you wearing?

Tyler, what are you wearing?

Next to nothing.

Okay.

I'm wearing mystic glow,

And that's all that's important.

And tons of it.

[Laughter]

Can I talk to you, ricky?

Yes.

So how about across

The street?

Okay.

There's been a lot of things

That I've wanted to say to ricky

For a while.

Before I came out here, I had

Been accepted to go to law

School, and that was my plans

For the next three years of

My life.

Right.

When I gave up my job as

A makeup artist to go to law

School, it took a huge chunk

Out of me, but being here and

Seeing you passionate about

Something that you are very

Convinced about has been very

Inspirational in my life,

'Cause now I feel more confident

About pursuing makeup and

Knowing that if I keep trying

And pursuing it and if I really

Want it, I can have it,

You know?

Because if it makes you happy,

Everything else kind of really

Doesn't matter anymore,

You know?

No matter what you do, if you

Keep trying and you keep doing

It and you keep telling people

You're gonna do it and you keep

Doing it, it works.

For me, I think this has

Encouraged me and sort of

Reaffirmed that success is

A journey.

It's not a destination.

You've touched me with what

You said, and it's made me happy

To hear all this.

Thank you.

Do you mind?

* It's the little things *

* That we do

* That mean anything

So what are we doing first?

Well, I want to paint this.

If you stand that way while

John's painting, blue will just

Fly all over you.

Look, he's acting like, "what?"

Stop thinking.

You're gonna hurt yourself.

Me and tyler are working on

This float together, but tyler,

You know, works for about

Ten minutes, gets sidetracked,

And then there's something else

To take care of, so the only

Person that's helped me out

At all has been ricky.

Where's that gaffer's

Tape at?

He realizes at this point

That without a little help,

This thing's not gonna get done.

Okay.

You've put tyler's glitter

Throwing to shame.

[Laughs]

Okay, now we'll let that dry.

I couldn't ask for fantasy

Fest to be at a better time,

Because it's a celebration.

It's the ending of our

Time here.

Open.

Oh, absolutely.

Absolutely.

Close.

Let me see you in

A different light.

Stand up for a second.

[Laughs]

You look so g*y.

[Laughs]

Oh, my gosh.

Aqua's having a competition

Called "sex or next," where you

Get up onstage and take off all

Your clothes and strip.

Okay, look up.

I like this lighting better.

And that night, I decided to

Do drag, so I thought, "well,

What better night?

I can strip out of

A bob mackie."

What time's the toga

Party start?

No idea.

Are you dressing up?

I have to try this--

My sheet on.

Tonight we're going to a toga

Party at sloppy joe's.

Jose, just get a bedsheet.

Get a bedsheet, dude.

That's what I'm wearing.

But you need a--you need

The--the--not that part

Of the sheet.

Nice.

Everybody is looking good.

You ready?

Yeah.

Fitz?

[Cheers and applause]

[People shouting]

Who do we got next?

I got one new contestant.

And what's your name?

Oh!

Johnny bananas.

[People cheering, screeching]

I'm entering this contest

'Cause basically it's a chance

To win a bunch of money.

Yeah!

From southern california,

This is the banana boy.

[Cheers and applause]

All the roommates and I are

Just going crazy, yelling,

Screaming, and trying to make

Sure that he wins the contest.

Ladies and gentlemen,

The winner of $ tonight,

From southern california...

[Cheers]

Yeah!

Whoo!

[Laughs]

After the toga contest,

I'm saying, "you know, guys,

Let's go, because tyler is

Participating in the drag show

At aqua at midnight."

I don't want to go to aqua.

Johnny bananas--

I don't want to go to aqua!

I'll hang out with you.

Where do you want to go?

Anywhere.

This is going off, dude.

We're going to rick's.

Go to rick's.

Go to rick's.

All right, let's go.

I'm disappointed in

The roommates because, I mean,

Once john starts whining and

Crying about the whole

Situation, they all just kind

Of give in to what he wants,

And they do what he wants to do.

* Ladies, say

* La, la-la, la

* Take off

* Take it

* I want to touch that

So, ladies and gentlemen,

Give a big hand for matthew.

[Crowd cheering]

Tyra quan is getting ready

To come up here now.

This is a boy, but he's gonna be

A girl for you tonight.

Give him a big hand.

Tyra quan.

Give it up!

[Cheers and applause]

[Saucy jazz music]

*

Go, tyler!

[Laughs]

Attaboy!

Go, tyler, go!

Go, tyler!

*

[Cheers and applause]

All: wow!

[Saucy jazz music]

*

All: wow!

[Cheers and applause]

Ladies and gentlemen,

Give it up for tyra quan!

[Cheers and applause]

Contestant number six.

Part of winning the

Competition is having the most

Friends there to cheer you on,

So the fact that I only have

Two friends there doesn't really

Bode well for me.

They all went to rick's.

All it takes is for john to

Start whining.

Everybody changes whatever they

Have to do to make john happy.

Well, thank you for being

True to tyler.

Tyra, thank you.

You were amazing.

And we have ourselves a winner!

[Cheers and applause]

The audience carried me

To second place, so I couldn't

Ask for anything more.

That's close enough.

It was close enough.

It was close enough.

I gave them two days' notice

Before the event, and none of

Them showed up, other than jose.

I was a little disappointed

That you guys didn't come

Last night.

I asked jose, obviously, why

Everyone didn't come, and I know

Johnny, like, freaked out, and

I was just kind of disappointed

That you guys would, like,

Indulge in that.

Would you have, like, won

Money and stuff?

Yeah.

I got second, and the reason

I didn't win was that, like,

He had all his friends there,

And none of my friends showed.

Yeah.

And I'm like, "oh, of course

They wouldn't show up," so--

I feel bad.

I'm sorry.

Yeah.

Zach, could you come here

Please?

I'm disappointed that the group

Was on its way to come see me,

And then he had a hissy fit,

And then everyone went back

Because he didn't want to go

To aqua.

As far as I'm concerned,

I--no one ever had a hissy fit.

No one ever complained.

No one ever said, "I'm

Not going."

I was having fun...

Once--

And the last thing I know

You want me to do is to do

Things just for other people--

Do things for myself.

I'm trying to explain to tyler

That it wasn't john who

Said anything.

It was purely my free will,

Wanting to--

Well, if that's the case,

Then I'm happy, 'cause that's

What I want, in all honesty.

I'm really hoping that all of

Us can finally end some of this

Ridiculous b.s. That's going

Around and just enjoy each

Other, enjoy key west, and be

Part of something that is very

Unique to this part of

The world.

This is gonna work.

Are you getting an audience?

Yeah!

Svetlana, you need to stand

Right here.

Okay.

Are you ready?

Yes.

[Laughs]

[Air hissing]

Yeah!

[Cheers and applause]

Hey!

Yeah!

Isn't that awesome?

That is k*ller.

Love it.

That looks kick-a*s.

It's perfect.

Yes.

Well, john, this is awesome.

Awesome.

[Upbeat pop music]

*

[Laughs]

Are we allflashdance?

Well, no, I'm 's

Aerobics instructor.

Tonight's 's night at

Fat tuesday's, and I decided

To be a.c. Slater for the night.

Zach's take on 's.

[Laughs]

It's really 's.

That is really 's.

*

Perfect.

Aww.

*

We're gonna win.

Well, we need to practice

Real quick.

The rest of the roommates

Have taken it upon themselves to

Enter themselves in an 's

Costume contest.

I guess all this planning went

On when I was outside working

On the float.

No one really let me in on it,

But to be honest, I am not in

The mood to participate in

Something like this anyways.

I'm exhausted.

Cab is here.

Cab's here.

Let's do it up, 's style.

That's how we roll.

Ha!

Whoo-ooh!

Whoo!

Thank you for coming down

Tonight.

And our first contestant--

We need cookie, matt freaks,

And number five is

The 's house.

All: one, two, three, 's.

Yes.

Yes.

First place winner will take

Home $,.

Yeah!

It's bucks for each of

Us, which is a lot more than

What we've been making at

Mystic tan.

That's for sure.

Right now, we're gonna bring

Up the 's house.

[All cheering]

Okay, guys.

Get in line.

Okay.

[Electronic music]

*

It's my time to shine.

I have money on my mind.

I go out there, and I do my best

Rendition offlashdance.

*

Go, 's!

Both: go, 's!

All: go, 's!

Go, 's!

And in first place and

The winner of $,,

The winner of the best

'S-themed costume,

The 's house!

'S on three.

All: one, two, three, 's!

I've been working on this

Float since : this morning.

I asked the roommates, "can

Someone come down and help me

Decorate all these things?"

It's just no one wants to help.

Hey, hit this guy right here.

Hey, get back here.

I cleared a spot out for you.

Over here?

Right here.

Okay.

Right here.

Yeah, I cleared a spot out for

You, man.

Without ricky's help, this thing

I don't think would've come

Together the way that it has,

And he really has come through

When I've needed him, and it

Really means a lot to me.

Let's go.

You're from paradise?

No, no, mystic tan.

Mystic tan.

.

Is paula gonna be able to

Help us on this?

Help you with what?

On the float.

Yeah.

Paula, are you going down to

Help them with the float?

Well, I'll take a cab.

I'll go down there with her.

Are you about to leave now?

Um, okay.

Well, we're gonna have to be

Sort of quick, 'cause we need to

Make sure we're ready for

Tonight too.

I understand that, and--

But we need to make sure

The float looks good.

Okay, well, we'll take care

Of it.

We'll be down there.

Thank you very much, girls.

Bye.

Okay, now I've got--

Got 'em coming.

They were unclear.

I knew from the beginning

That this was gonna be a project

That I was gonna be doing

The majority of the work on.

I just need this to be a success

Just to show everyone else that,

You know, I can do it.

I asked a long time ago,

"Do people need help on

The float?"

Well, the day of, it's not

Working out for janelle's

Schedule because--

Well, no, it--

I have to concern myself

With my costume.

And if you're gonna take

And say, "you know what?

I'm gonna do the float,"

You don't wait till the last

Two days before a parade.

Before you say, "I need

Everyone to help me."

At this point, we all have to

Put our costumes on, so it's,

Like, go help out on the float

Or jeopardize having our

Costumes look terrible on

The float, so I decide I'm gonna

Stay home because I want to make

Sure I look good on this float.

So when does the parade

Start, :?

:.

[Sighs]

And when do we have to be

Lined up?

We have to be wherever

The float is at :.

We need somebody to help

Paint the name across the float,

Our name.

We need people to help put

Glitter on it.

We need help--people putting

The foliage on it.

I'm just stressed out because

There's a lot of work here.

Well, I'm not--i'm just

Pissed that they weren't up here

Earlier helping you guys out,

'Cause it sucks that you guys

Are stressed now, 'cause you

Know I would've been there and

Jose would've been there,

But there wasn't the car.

There was nothing.

I have been stressed out about

The float since john had

The idea to build one, because

I knew it was going to come down

To the last minute.

Well, ricky, when we get there

At :, will we be able to

Finish everything up in time?

Yes, we will.

All right, ricky, we'll see

You then, okay?

I know that when : rolls

Around, jose and I will be

At the float, but I know--

I know that the roommates

Will not be.

I'll see you at :.

All right, buddy, take care.

Bye.

Thank you.

I'm really starting to wonder

If this is actually gonna

Come together.

I did not expect it to require

This much time and effort.

Brought you something.

Oh, my god!

Barb, I was freaking out.

Dude, I was like, "I don't have

Her number.

I don't know how to get

Ahold of her."

The theme for this year's

Fantasy fest is freaks, geeks,

And goddesses, so naturally,

I chose to dress as a geek.

If you were to marry any planet,

What planet would you marry?

Uranus.

[Both chortle]

We're the best.

You said it.

We're gonna get all the chicks.

All the chicks tonight.

[Both chortle obnoxiously]

We are now all rushing to

Get out of the house because

We know we have to be on this

Float within minutes.

John!

Hey!

Hey, john, what can we help

You with, sir?

It's gonna be a fantasy fest

Marathon.

I don't--i mean, it's just

Stupid, dude.

Like, :--

How hard is it to show up

At :?

I know.

What's really frustrating me

Now is that the roommates can't

Even show up on time.

I mean, we actually are leaving

The staging area now, and we're

Missing four people.

Tyler, janelle, paula, and fitz

Have had all day to get ready,

But instead, they've been at

Home all day, screwing around.

Come on, let's go.

Tyler, let's go!

We have no idea where

The beginning of

The parade starts.

We're picturing the boys,

You know, fuming at the ears

'Cause we're not there yet.

They're probably, you know,

Thinking we're never gonna

Make it.

This is awesome.

Yeah.

Congratulations.

[Bleep] everything else.

Who cares? This is awesome.

Seriously.

I'm trying to help john

Realize that it's not about

The girls.

It's not about tyler.

This is not about them.

This is about you.

This is about mystic tan.

This is about something that

You've been working on.

Pick up the pace!

Pick up the pace, b*tches!

Oh, I can't run.

My boobies fall out.

Well, we should've thought

About that earlier now,

Young lady.

Knowing janelle, tyler,

Paula, and svetlana's track

Record, I wouldn't be surprised

If we don't see them till midway

Through the parade.

You can't start without us!

Next onthe real world...

Fantasy fest is one

Giant party.

All: mystic tan on demand!

Four months of working at

Minimum wage or less has

Definitely been worth it

With this final chapter

At mystic tan.

Here's a cab.

Oh, my god.

It's gonna be hard to leave.

I guess all good things got

To come to an end.

[British accent] cheers from

London.

[British accent] london.

We come a long ways.

Both: cheers.

And we are here to perform

A performance at fat tuesday's

This evening.

You know what?

London?

Jose.

That's the worst british

Accent I've ever heard.

Yes?

I think my friend cindy

Behind us here is one crumpet

Short of a proper tea.

This is true.

[Laughter]

Bloody mess.

Bloody, bloody mess.

Bloody, bloody.

Cheers.

Cheers to that.

Long live the king.

Long live london, cheers.

London.