03x29 - Francesca

[bunniefuu]

My Three Sons.

Starring Fred McMurray And as Bub,
William Frawley I bet you it's a fox or something.

Nah, if it was a fox, tr*mp wouldn't bark like that.

Like when you tell him to play d*ck, he gives you his paw.

Yeah, well, I'm going to bring it out alive.

Well, what if it is a fox?

I'll be right back.

Now, Chip, what goofy thing are you doing now?

Hey, I told you he was barking at something.

Look!

It's no fox.

It's a bird, a wild bird.

tr*mp, watch out.

Hey, it's a wild bird.

Hi, wild bird.

Well, look at that poor little thing.

He must be sick or something.

Let me see him, Chip.

No, he's my wild bird.

Well, I just want to diagnose him.

Well, okay, but be careful.

Boy, maybe something's busted.

Maybe it's his wing.

Hey, he's got a cold beak.

That's a good sign.

Only for dogs.

He's sick.

I got a play doctor kit.

Maybe we could operate.

You're not operating on my wild bird.

At least we could give him a couple of aspirins.

What he needs is a lot of crumbs and some
warm milk and a warm place to rest.

We could put him in the oven.

A hot water bottle would be better if we
had a hot water bottle.

We got one.

On account of my father says my mother has cold feet.

He won't mind this week.

He's in Schenectady.

Why don't you guys go get it while I give
him something to eat?

Okay, but don't let my bird get away.

Come on, Seth.

Come on, Karen, come on.

Boy, stop shivering.

You're not friends.

We'll get us all the crumbs you can eat.

Yeah, boy, come on.

And Chip isn't a bad guy once you really get to know him.

But you better watch out for Sudsy.

Boy, you just bump your head on the window
and he's liable to take out your appendix.

Hello?

Goosey?

Is someone home?

Oh, boy.

In the box.

There you go.

Where did you come from?

I think she must have fainted and bumped
her head when she fell.

Will she be okay?

Oh, yes.

My guess is that she fainted from hunger.

Hunger?

Well, couldn't I fix her something, doctor?

Well, maybe some soup.

Okay.

Robbie.

Don't you think you should call the police?

Well, what for?

She hasn't done anything.

She did break in.

Well, she doesn't look very dangerous to me.

She's coming to.

No.

No, it's not.

Who are you?

I didn't do anything.

Now, take it easy.

You're among friends.

You can't keep me here.

I'll go.

Please.

Nobody wants to hurt you.

We want to help you.

You're safe.

That's it.

I'm a doctor.

Robbie found you on the floor unconscious and he called me.

How would you like a big bowl of soup?

It's great stuff.

Noodles and vegetables and chunks of meat sometimes.

Don't go away.

Well, I wish I could do more for you.

You need some rest and you need some food.

Robbie, you mean well, but you don't know
anything about her.

Well, I know she's hungry.

We fed a little wild bird.

We can feed a human being.

All right, Robbie.

Thanks, Doctor.

I got the hot water bottle.

Where's the wild bird?

Well, he's in the shoe box.

Chip, you're going to have to take over with him.

I'm going to be busy fishing the soup for
a girl who painted on our kitchen floor.

A girl?

Where?

Well, she's in Bub's room.

Boy, you're going to get it when Bub comes home.

You know what he said about keeping our stuff in his room.

Come on, Sanji, let's go look at her.

Hey, you guys, don't bother her.

She's resting.

I showed you my bird.

How did I get to look at your girl?

Yeah, I guess that's right.

Hi.

Hi.

This is my friend Sudsy.

Pleased to meet you.

This is our wild bird.

We found him in the bushes.

And that's my mother's hot water bottle.

Oh, say, Lord, que piccolo.

Hey, she can talk.

Why you put a wild bird in such a little box?

Well, that's his house.

He'll get used to it.

He's sick.

But when he gets better, I'll teach him tricks.

We'll give him a good home.

We'll get him some worms, too.

They're very good for you.

Full of vitamins.

Hey, Sue, why didn't you make her a cheeseburger?

Well, because we don't happen to have any
canned cheeseburgers.

Did you call the police?

Police?

Of course not.

Hey, I'll leave my wild bird in here with you for company.

You know, I don't want to cello or whatever.

Whatever you call it.

Uccello.

It's Italian for bird.

You come from Italy?

From Milano.

What's your name?

Francesca.

Francesca Paoli.

Okay, you guys, get lost.

Stop bothering her with your goofy questions.

Okay, cello, you stay in here with Francesca.

See ya.

You eat as much as you can, Francesca,
till you get good and strong.

You are a very good person.

Thank you.

Senor.

Robbie.

Robbie Douglas.

Senor Robbie.

Get it.

They walk the warehouse music.

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Hi.

Hi.

What are you getting all dressed up for?

Dinner.

Can of spaghetti.

Can of spaghetti.

With meatballs.

Okay.

What's going on around here?

Well, Dad and Bub left for the day.

Oh, Chip found a sick bird in the bushes.

Yeah, a cello.

Yeah.

And a girl fainted on our kitchen floor.

Dr. Newton said she fainted from hunger, so I fixed some soup
for her, and if she felt up to it, she could eat with us.

Wait, wait, wait.

What girl?

Francesca.

Francesca what?

Uh, Francesca...

Who knows?

Well, I don't know.

What do you know about her?

Well, she's from Milan and, boy, she's really turbulent.

And talk about eyelashes.

Where is she?

Well, she's in Bub's bed.

How's my tie?

It's from... In Bub's bed?

Mm-hmm.

Let's go.

Oh.

Father, I hear about you.

Hmm.

Well, now I'd like to hear about you.

You think I'm something bad?

Uh, Chip, why don't you, uh...

get your shoe box and leave us alone.

Boy, he keeps trying to get out,
even with the alarm clock in there.

Alarm clock?

Yeah, Francesca knows all about birds.

She says when Chella hears the ticking of the
clock that he thinks that it's his mother's heart.

We do that in our house with small animals.

Well, I've heard of grandfather clock before, but
it's the first time I've ever heard of a mother clock.

Uh, Francesca, it's kind of up to me to
see that Rob and Chip don't get into trouble.

I understand.

I am an intruder.

I shouldn't expect help from strangers.

Well, heck, if you can't depend on a
stranger, who can you depend on?

Like, for instance, what were you doing in our kitchen?

Well, I knocked, and nobody answered.

Well, uh, perhaps we can contact somebody for you.

Where is your family?

How about shining a bright light in her eyes, Mike?

Maybe that'll make her talk.

Well, uh, I think the only sensible thing
to do is call the police.

Oh, no.

Please.

I'll tell you everything.

Everything.

Oh, that's better.

My name is Francesca Paoli.

I'm from Milan.

Italy.

Italy.

My father is a very important man in Milano.

He's a count.

That's a very high kind of nobility.

I'm a contessa.

Oh, contessa.

Si.

My father sent me here to marry the son of
his old friend, Amadeo D'Angelo.

I never met this underfoot.

But I come on the boat to Philadelphia.

There's this Giovanni D'Angelo wait for me.

Giovanni must be Amadeo's son.

Yes, that's what I said.

He's a very ugly man, very rough.

Come si dice, paesano.

He treat me very cruel.

I like a servant.

Well, why don't you go back to Milano?

I can't.

My father promised I'd marry.

I had to run away before the wedding.

If it's far, I'm out of money.

I have to work.

So I see this lady, and she say that in
this house only men live.

I think maybe I could go clean.

Well, how about that?

A genuine contessa.

Mike, we gotta invite her to dinner.

How often do you find a contessa on the street?

On your kitchen floor.

Well, you can stay to dinner, I guess.

Oh, thanks, Mike.

Good idea.

You can just relax, contessa.

This house might not be much if you're used to villas
and stuff like that, but try and make yourself at home.

Good night.

Ten numbers must be long distance.

Boy, you've got a nerve.

Did you have to go fishing through a handbag?

Mike, couldn't you just relax and be nice to her?

She's such a helpless little thing.

What's the matter with you?

You stuck on her?

Heck, Sudsy's mother told him that if she
found him in her handbag once more,

that he'd be on bread and water for a whole month.

Hello?

Uh, who am I speaking to, please?

Veradino's Grocery?

Some contessa.

Excuse me, but, uh, is there anyone there
who knows a Francesca Paoli?

Oh, C.C., we call her sister.

Uh, hello.

Slow down.

Take it easy.

She's perfectly all right.

Yeah, she's right here in Bryant Park.

I'm Mike Douglas.

Yes, I'll have her call you as soon as she can.

All right, thank you very much.

Goodbye.

Well, Sherlock, well, your contessa's
running away from Philadelphia, all right.

From a job there as a housemaid.

Well, what's so wrong with that?

Nothing's wrong with it, except when you come from a
foreign country to work here, you have to have a sponsor.

Apparently, her sponsor died.

Oh, and by the way, she doesn't come from Milano.

She comes from a little village near Milano called Petraco.

Boy, she sure must want to stay here awful bad.

Why did she have to lie?

Well, we don't have much choice now.

We have to turn her over to the police.

Well, Mike, couldn't we wait till after
dinner to call the police just as well?

I saw a sheriff on TV give a lady bank
robber a half an hour head start on her horse.

Well, maybe we could keep quiet about it till after dinner.

May I come in?

Sure, come on in.

All right, certainly.

In Milan, I live in a gran palazzo.

We used to have many cooks.

I play in the kitchen, and they teach me how to make pasta.

I make it for you tonight.

I'd rather have spaghetti.

Oh, there is spaghetti.

I guess they have a lot of festivals and
masquerade ba*ls at your palazzo, huh?

Oh, yes, we dance almost every night.

Oh, all night sometimes.

All the ladies and gentlemen of Milan will
come to honor my father.

The count?

Mm-hmm.

The young gentlemen, the moonlight, the orchestras.

Oh, I can almost hear the mandolins playing right now.

I don't hear anything.

Well, that's because you're not dancing.

Come here.

Hey, I can't dance.

Whoa.

Someday you will come to Milano.

You will come visit my palazzo.

My father will give you a great banquet to
repay your kindness.

Oh, yeah, I remember that scene in the movie.

That's where the contessa falls in love
with the rich young American who saves her

from that creep her dad wanted her to marry.

What a picture.

Palazzo Bellissima, starring Antonio.

Not there.

Yeah, that's right.

You know then.

Yes, Francesca.

I, uh, I found this number in your handbag.

I called your sister.

You call police?

No, not yet.

But the immigration authorities are going to have to know.

Don't tell them, Michael.

Let me go.

As if I were never here.

Please don't go, Francesca.

Where would you go?

Well, I won't go back to Petraco.

That little farm won't even feed us.

My father works all day.

My mother just gets older.

I want to stay in America.

Oh, boy, I wish Dad was here.

Me too.

I'm glad I didn't bring Chella to Mike.

Mike would have shot Chella to put him out of its misery.

I have to do what's right.

I should have known it.

Couldn't even have dinner first.

Robbie, it's a thing he must do.

I understand.

Professor Gerrard.

Professor, Mike Douglas.

Fine, thank you, sir.

I'm sorry to bother you at home,
but I need some information in a hurry.

Well, if I'm not mistaken, didn't you
lecture our class once on immigration laws?

Yes.

Could you tell me what happens if a girl is brought
over to this country to work as a domestic servant?

Yes, I know she has to have a sponsor when she's
in this country, but what happens if that sponsor dies?

I see.

Well, thank you very much, Professor.

Thank you.

Bye-bye.

You didn't have to run away at all.

Just get yourself another sponsor.

I don't have to go back?

Great!

Will you see what happens when you get the facts?

Yeah.

That's not what my sister said.

Well, who cares about your sister?

Your sister didn't know what she was talking about.

Where do I get a sponsor?

You shouldn't have any trouble finding a
sponsor, whatever that is.

Heck no.

Dad will probably be your sponsor.

Well, yeah, of course.

And Dad will be home tonight.

Meanwhile, we can have dinner.

Dinner on the terrazzo of our palazzo with our Contessa.

I mean, Contessa.

Right, and we'll have mandolins.

High-five mandolins.

And the Contessa and the rich young
American lived happily ever after.

Robbie.

Come, we make pasta.

In one weekend, you're guaranteed one food.

Mm-mm, good.

What?

It won't raise your blood pressure.

Chip, what are you doing up this hour?

I woke up when you guys drove in.

I wanted to tell you about cello.

Cello?

Yeah, that's short for Uccello.

It means bird in Italian.

tr*mp found this sick bird in the bushes, so we put
a hot water bottle and alarm clock in the box with it.

Oh.

Oh, Francesca says an alarm clock ticking in the
nest is sort of like the beating of a mother's heart.

Wait a minute, you just lost me.

I take it Cello is a bird tr*mp found in
the bushes, but who is Francesca?

Well, you see, Dad, she was hungry,
so she came into our kitchen to steal some

milk and stuff, and she fainted and hit her head.

Yeah.

Like Cello bumped into the window he was
trying to fly through.

So naturally, I shouldn't go into my bedroom.

Oh, right, because after dinner, Francesca was tired out.

She's sleeping in there.

Bub, we thought just this once, you could
sleep up in my room, and I can sleep on the couch.

Yeah, Bub.

And then tomorrow, Dad could sign us as sponsors.

She could stay in this country and live here with us.

Hold it, hold it.

Give me that again.

Oh, never mind this.

Who's sleeping in whose room?

I told you he'd be sore.

Look, uh, could Francesca by any chance be
a young, pretty girl?

Oh, boy, how'd you know, Dad?

She's, she's just too much.

Holder, it's Jell-O tricks.

You know, I think maybe we'd better look in on Francesca.

We'll bother her at this hour?

I think so, Mom.

Hey, don't wake up Jell-O.

He needs his rest.

What about me?

Just wake up.

Francesca?

Francesca?

Francesca?

Jell-O?

Dad, Jell-O's gone.

And it seems Francesca's gone, too.

No, no.

Nothing.

Just, just gone.

Why'd you let him go?

Well, maybe the bird was better, Chip.

Francesca thought it was time for both of them to go.

Boy, I'll never trust a woman again.

But she seems so nice.

Well, let's clear out of here and let Bub get to bed.

Yeah, I wish you would.

You get back to bed, too, Chipper.

Good night, Bub.

Good night, Chip.

Good night.

Good night, Bub.

Good night.

Francesca.

Cello.

One day out of the house and they turned
my room into a bird sanctuary.

And after all we did for Francesca, she just flew the Coop.

You sure were wrong about her.

Well, I'm proud of all of you for being
decent human beings.

But I wouldn't be too hard on Francesca.

Dad, she didn't even say goodbye.

Yeah.

I know.

Now, Chip found an injured bird and took care of it.

But when it was well, it didn't want to be
imprisoned in a shoebox anymore.

Not even a nice, warm, comfortable shoebox.

Yeah.

Well, good night, Dad.

Good night.

Good night.

I'm sure she'll always remember and be very grateful.

Well, I'll sure remember Francesca.

Good night, Ron.

Look, up in the sky.

It's a bird.

It's a plane.

It's not Superman.

It's My Favorite Martian.

Stay tuned for two episodes of My Favorite
Martian during this twice as nice morning on TV Land.

Stay tuned for two episodes of My Favorite
Martian during this twice as nice morning on TV Land.