04x01 - George Searches For A Needle In A Haight-Stack

[bunniefuu]

Look, if the police don't search for runaways,

then who am I supposed to call?

Well, what would a 15-year-old girl

have to do before the police could start looking for her?

OK, well, it's good I called, because I

checked my daughter's stuffed animals

and her as*ault r*fle's missing.

The one with the night scope.

Daddy, I'm home.

Carmen, thank God.

Oh, my God. Zach got you pregnant? I'll k*ll him!

No, no, no, no. It wasn't Zach.

It was my new boyfriend.

Hey, it's amazing how girls always go for a mirror image of the father.

Ha-ha, huh? Look at that.

Carrot top?

Carmen, you're having a baby with carrot top?

Wait till you see how little baby Carrot's gonna look.

Look at this.

Feed me, change me, love me.

Angie!

How'd you come down here? Carmen's home and she's pregnant.

That's great!

How'd you come down here? Carmen's home and she's pregnant.

That's great!

We can do Lamaze together.

What the hell is going on here?

I'm not as flexible as I used to be.

I hope the head on this one is smaller than yours.

I'm not as flexible as I used to be.

Dad?

Where's this gonna come out?

If you're lucky, the belly button.

What? No, Colin's on the phone.

If you're lucky, the belly button.

What? No, Colin's on the phone.

Where is she? Let me talk to her.

She's okay.

Where is she? Let me talk to her.

Honey, where are you? Have you been eating?

Who cares if she's been eating? Let me talk to her.

No, your father's not mad anymore.

I put medication in his coffee.

He doesn't even know he's taking it.

Your little road trip with Zach is over.

Your little road trip with Zach is over.

Tell me where you are. I'm coming to get you.

She hung up.

I told you it would screw with your head to call your parents.

I shouldn't have called.

I shouldn't have called.

Cheer up.

We're in San Francisco, the most romantic city in the world.

Now let's go k*ll this vodka.

All that just for us?

That's why we're going to drink in the hotel room.

If you get dizzy, there'll be a bed for you to lie down on.

I'll take care of you.

You're always thinking of me.

My dad is so wrong about you.

It's a cell phone call.

The phone company can't trace it.

I don't know.

I don't know.

Hey, come on now.

Let's look on the bright side.

At least you know she's okay.

There's hope.

Sometimes hope is all you get.

Oh, with all the crap these kids can get into

on the street, alcohol, drugs,

prostitution, p*rn*graphy, sometimes all four at once.

What's the point of all this?

Thanks for bringing by the hope.

I'm sure Carmen will be home soon.

Maybe...

Her pimp will give her off for Thanksgiving.

All my friends know the lowrider The lowrider is a little higher

her pimp will give her off for Thanksgiving.

All my friends know the lowrider

The lowrider is a little higher

you know, just ask.

Hey, any word on Carmen?

No, not since the last call.

Well, if there's anything I can do, George,

Shh. Why run away?

Yeah, you can tell me when I became worse than my mother.

What are you talking about?

Well, she was horrible, dude, and I never ran away.

drinking out of a paper bag?

Dude, living with your mom

was already like being on the street.

There was no food, no heat,

and you were always getting yelled at by a crazy lady

drinking out of a paper bag?

You know, when I was three,

I used to put my sippy cup in a brown paper bag.

I thought that's just the way you drank things.

Where do you take Carmen?

Hey.

It'll be more private.

George, I heard from my son.

Where are they?

Where do you take Carmen?

Why don't we talk in here?

It'll be more private.

Mel, I think everyone can hear us through the fence.

All right, not private.

He snuck into the house last night. I found him sleeping on the couch.

Tell me where she is.

What the hell's going on?

And where the hell is my daughter?

Oh, boy, I am glad I went with the cage thing.

He snuck into the house last night.

I found him sleeping on the couch.

Tell me where she is.

Look, I don't care if you are the boss's son.

I swear to God, I'll k*ll you.

She's still in San Francisco.

She ditched me at some club in the hate.

I don't know where she is now.

All right, listen to me, Matt.

We'll go up there and find her.

And if anything's happened to my little girl,

I will beat you into a coma.

And I don't care if I have to sit by your bedside

for 20 years.

The second you wake up, bam, right back into coma.

Here are the flyers for San Francisco.

This is the most recent picture of Carmen.

You know, Carmen might have changed her look.

Sir, visiting hours are over.

Here, look.

Zach, get out of here now.

You better hope my daughter's all right.

This is if she was part monkey.

Max.

George, George, I found Zach

and I stopped him good.

Yeah, that's probably it.

Now, here's the same monkey picture,

your son has been in a terrible

I'm here to help. Let's do it.

Here are the flyers for San Francisco.

This is the most recent picture of Carmen.

You know, Carmen might have changed her look.

So I made my own flyers with a computer.

Well, why does someone...

This is Carmen with blonde hair.

Here she is if she shaved her head and joined a cult.

This is if she was part monkey.

Carmen, you're not supposed to confront her.

I think I know what's going on here, son.

You miss your sister and you don't know how to deal with it.

Yeah, that's probably it.

Now here's the same monkey picture except now

she has a pickle for a nose.

Yeah, that'll keep me calm.

Where do you think you're going?

Hey, Angie, what's your dad doing here?

Since I'm staying here with Max,

I thought someone should go with you.

Well, why does someone need to go with me?

I picked up some literature on how to deal with runaways.

When you find Carmen, you're not supposed to confront her.

Don't fight, don't judge.

Just let your child know they'll be welcome back with open arms.

I asked Daddy to go with you to make sure you don't lose your cool.

little head.

That'll keep me calm.

Six hours in the car with that heavy Cuban accent.

Making every sign sound angry.

Give her time to process her emotions.

Fine.

Food and gas, no sexy.

I will lower my voice, George, because I know how this feels.

I, too, drove my princess into the arms of a man with no future.

That was me.

don't even get in the car.

This was before you.

Hey, this guy made a helicopter part

and had a tiny...

little head.

We're wasting time. Let's go.

Just remember not to fight with Carmen.

She's feeling really alone right now.

Give her time to process her emotions.

George?

If you want my opinion as a cardiologist,

if Carmen's been wandering San Francisco for two weeks,

I'll bring her home kicking and screaming if I have to.

And if you don't agree with that, don't even get in the car.

Hey, if I didn't agree,

would I have brought serotis in my medical bag?

One sign of resistance and...

The what?

Garmin is out like a light.

How could they name a neighborhood the Castro?

You know what, Vic?

Why don't you take a handful of those now,

and I'll wake you up when we get there.

Hey, hey, hey, come on, come on.

If you want my opinion as a cardiologist,

Everything is going to be fine.

she's about to drop dead from this freaking hill.

Suck it up.

Look, we've only been at it for three days,

and this is a big city.

So we'll finish up here, then we'll head up to the Castro.

The what?

It's a neighborhood, Vic.

How could they name a neighborhood the Castro?

You don't see me going for falafel in the Hitler town.

Let's just finish this block.

I think this block is covered.

Hey, hey, hey, come on, come on.

Don't worry, my friend.

Everything is going to be fine.

I have to get in there.

Are you putting up pictures of Carmen Lopez?

Yeah, do you know where she is?

She's at the Regal Plaza, suite 963.

Thank you, thank you so much.

Hey, is she OK?

Just hurry.

I don't know how much longer she'll be there.

She's at a suite at the Regal Plaza.

It's just up that hill.

Carmen!

Hey, Chingy, I'm sorry. I'll take care of it.

Carmen's in that room.

Hey, where do you think you're going, man?

I have to get in there.

Yeah, so does every other brother in this hotel.

I don't think you understand. I'm Dr. Vic Palmetto, cardiologist.

The hotel sent me up here. Somebody's having heart pains.

Okay, so who's he?

This is my nurse, George.

Well, Zach broke up with me at a club,

and I was crying in the bathroom,

and one of Chingy's dancers was there to cheer me up,

Hey, senior, I'm sorry. I'll take care of it.

Relax, man. That's my daughter.

That's your pops?

I can't believe you.

You want them out of here?

Carpenter, get your stuff, I'm taking you home.

No, no, we're not going anywhere.

I'm staying with my friends.

Friends, how do you even know these people?

Well, Zach broke up with me at a club

and I was crying in the bathroom

and one of Chingy's dancers was there to cheer me up,

so we just started hanging.

Who's Chingy?

Who's Chingy?

I can't believe you, his videos are on all the time.

Lady doesn't want to go.

Lady doesn't go.

Is she okay, George?

Hey, what is Chingy doing here?

Okay, get your stuff. I'm taking you home.

No! God, no, we're not going anywhere.

These are my new family. They're gonna protect me.

Before we get to the angel food cake,

The lady's 15. I'm out.

Hey, there she is.

Look, look, I made all your favorites.

You must be hungry.

You know what?

Before we get to the angel food cake,

I want you to know that I didn't lose my cool

or confront Carmen the whole six-hour ride home.

But call me old-fashioned,

I think we got some things to talk about.

Max.

We're not gonna talk about punishment now.

We're just glad she's home.

What?

We have to talk about punishment.

I think I should get her cell phone.

Yeah, this is a real good lesson for me.

Hey, I was here.

I'm the good one.

I did all her chores.

I think I should at least get her laptop.

Now's not the time, George.

Go to bed. Now.

Yeah, this is a real good lesson for me.

I'll see you guys in the morning.

You know, you're damn right I have issues.

All right. What the hell happened up there?

Now's not the time, George. It's none of your business anyway.

Everything you do is my business.

I have a father and a mother who treat me like a baby and control everything I do.

You know, you're damn right I have issues.

Look, I tried to give you everything I never had, and you run away from it.

Oh, yeah, I have everything.

I have a father and a mother who treat me like a baby and control everything I do.

Carmen, you're lucky you have parents who care.

George.

And I would pray that my mom would come home sick

so I could see her before bedtime.

If I was lucky, she came home drunk with a spin

so she'd have to hold on to me.

That was my hug.

Maybe you should have thought of that when you told me to leave.

Remember the literature?

She's home safe and sound.

We should be happy now.

Look, Angie, don't try to pretend everything's all right, okay?

Because it wasn't all right last night when you were crying.

Maybe you should have thought of that when you told me to leave.

Stop it!

We all need to give each other time to accept...

to accept the reunification process.

Sorry, Mom.

Well, it's all over now. You're home, huh?

And I am not gonna hammer you with questions.

You want some tea, honey?

Sugar? Cream? Are you a woman now, cookie?

If you think it's wild backstage at the show,

I'm sorry.

So what grade is Chingy in?

And next on Inside the Music, we'll look at rap groupies.

If you think it's wild backstage at the show,

wait till you see what happens at the hotel with the hoes.

Unfortunately, the wide-eyed fawn has wandered too far from the herd.

Notice how she seems unprepared

when the large stag gets into the mating position.

Why shouldn't I? I've been going out every night for two weeks.

Where do you think you're going?

Enough?

It's your first night home. You think you're going out?

Why shouldn't I? I've been going out every night for two weeks.

No, I don't.

Enough? What does that mean?

You know what that means.

You think I had sex with Zack?

You were in a hotel room alone with Zach.

I can't think I know what happened.

You think I had sex with Zach?

How stupid do you think I am?

He tried to get me to, but I wouldn't.

Yeah, right. How stupid do you think I am?

It's San Francisco.

Nothing happened.

men and men, size kids are free for all up there.

Nothing happened.

He tried to get me drunk, and I wouldn't do that either.

Okay, what do you want to do?

You want to take me to a doctor and test me?

You know what? We'll go right now.

They have a test?

You know what? We'll go right now.

What time is it? 9 o'clock? We'll go to the urgent care.

Don't lie to me!

I didn't!

You raised me better than that.

Don't lie to me!

I wasn't there enough.

You raised me better than that.

I was way too tough on you.

I wasn't there enough.

I worked too hard.

I lost my temper.

It was way too tough on you.

It worked, okay?

But whenever Zach wanted to do something,

I kept hearing your voice.

Don't do anything you'd be ashamed

to tell me or Mom about.

It worked, okay?

I'm pretty sure your mom told you that,

but I'm always gonna be right.

Well, since we're admitting stuff,

you're right about Zach.

He was only after one thing.

You know, baby, I wish I could say

I will.

but I'm always gonna be right.

I'm always gonna be right.

so are we okay here yeah we're okay once you get some sleep baby you've had a long day I

will right after I go out you're going out but you just got back you're not going out

Okay.

I get it. It's too soon.

I'll just go to bed.

Thank you.

But things are different now.

I'm different.

I partied with Chingy, and I shared a sandwich

with a homeless guy.

I've done it all.

So, no more curfews?

and no more rules.

George, Angie, tomorrow night I'm going out.

Did she just call me Angie?

tomorrow night,

I'm going out.

Did she just call me Angie?

She's right.

Things are different.

They're worse.

What are we gonna do with her?

You know what? She's in her own bed now.

Let's just try to have one night of peace.

And in the final act of dominance,

the parent chimp bashes the adolescent chimp

with a rock in the head,

I ran away once.

Wait, wait, wait. Don't change it.

I like this show.

You know, if I'd have realized

how much you worried my parents,

I never would have run away when I was a kid.

Chasing the ice cream man Ernie is not running away

I ran away once

I was gone for three weeks

and I hit him with his own thermos.

Oh I finally figured out how to get out of that trucker's cab

There's some lettuce that never made it to Bakersfield.

Even a serial k*ller knows when he's bitten off more than he can chew

No no he fell asleep at a rest stop

And I hit him with his own thermos

for father freedom.

There's some lettuce that never made it to Bakersfield.

I have the greatest running away story of all.

But I was running to something.

I left Mother Cuba...

for Father Freedom.

It was 1961.

Fold, fold.

Where is my thermos?