01x06 - Episode 6

[bunniefuu]

-[inmate] You got it?
-[inmate 2] Yeah, got it. Thanks!

[inmate] Merry Christmas!

Well, I wouldn't say merry.
I mean, not really.

The Christmas season, that's when we get
the most suicide attempts around here.

-How you holdin' up?
-Honestly, I'm in a good place right now.

I'm back in school, reading a lot.

I see they put you back on orderly duty.
I'm glad to hear it.

-Here, this is Birnbaum's file.
-Thanks.

Yeah, with some inmates, you have to keep
a certain professional distance.

Babying them won't turn them into adults
who are independent and responsible.

Anyway, congratulations on getting
your life back on track. Well done.

Thank you so much.
The thing is, I've had some help.

I'm lucky someone's backing me
and wants me to pull through.

Mmm.

Must be nice having someone
in your corner like that.

Yeah. We met on social media.
At first, she was just a fan.

But since I came to prison,
we've been writing a lot.

-[phone chimes]
-Her name's Sabryina.

-[computer chirps]
-[chuckles]

[typing on keyboard]

Either way, once they get out of here,
they'll be by themselves,

so they've gotta learn to get by
on their own.

That's the Corinne method, yeah?

I haven't met her yet.

-But I think I'm in love.
-[officer] Mmm.

Maybe I should write a book, right?

[door buzzer sounds]

[prisoner] Officer!

MINIMUM SECURITY

PRISON ADMINISTRATION

{\an8}There you go. Merry Christmas, Jeff.

{\an8}Ah.

Oof.

Yes, at my recommendation,
Jeff was promoted

to Senior Corrections Officer.

But I figured it'd be nicer to give him
his new stripes on Christmas,

so he'd go "Wow!"

-[sobbing]
-No, no, no. No crying.

No crying, no crying, no crying, Jeff.

Oh, boy. Jeff, pull yourself together
a little, okay?

-Oh, no.
-This is the happiest day of my...

-What?
-This is the happiest day of my life.

-[sobbing]
-Hold on, Jeff. Pull yourself together.

Everything's okay.
Tonight you're the boss. I'm off duty.

So make sure everything runs smoothly.

You, you, you, you can go home, go home,
go home and rest easy tonight, boss.

-Okay, sure.
-[gasping breaths]

-Easy, now.
-[sobbing]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Stop that. No more crying. No more--

Oh, no, no, no. Come on.

[chuckles]

There's a new sheriff in town.

[♪ Caribbean music playing]

How 'bout somethin'
a little more old school?

[tuts] That's not the vibe, Michel.

Yeah, every Christmas, inmates can get
a care package from their families.

Five kilos maximum.

[Michel] I'm tellin' you,
this has to be over five kilos.

-So... Told you.
-Let's see if we take out the chips.

-Guess that worked.
-Look at that.

[JP] Yeah, it gives us a little extra
work, but it's no big deal,

because I like working Christmas.

It's kind of like the last day of school,
you know what I mean?

[laughter]

-[JP] Everybody's in good spirits.
-I remember your first day.

[JP] We play games.

-Hey, how about a little Truth or Dare?
-Oh, yeah, good idea.

-Yeah.
-You guys are in?

[music stops]

-What are you doing?
-Do you know what this is?

-Dandruff?
-Senior Officer.

So now your little party is over.
Get back to work.

-Who the hell let this through?
-[Stéphanie] I did. Why?

Five kilos of oranges
doesn't seem suspicious to you?

I don't know.
Maybe his family's pretty broke, right?

[sighs deeply]

Watch. I'll teach you something.
Pay attention.

[sniffs]

It's vodka.
They fill them up with syringes.

-You sure? Let me taste.
-Ugh, Michel.

So take every package back
and start over, okay?

-Oh!
-Oh, no.

This one's confiscated,
and this, and this.

-[Stéphanie] No, come on.
-And that too, Michel.

Let go, Michel!

Okay, back to work, now.

Jewish thief.

But he isn't even Jewish, Michel.

[sighs] Can't say anything anymore.

No, no, no. I don't celebrate Christmas.

Anyway, who have I got
to spend it with, hmm?

[gate buzzer sounds]

Officer.

Officer.

[gate bangs]

I just wanna understand, that's all.

Don't worry about me.
I don't need nobody but myself.

All right, truth or dare?

Dare, dare. Let's go, let's go.

Okay, then. Eat this.

Mmm.

[JP] Yeah, I keep thinkin' maybe
something could happen on Christmas Eve.

With the whole Christmas spirit and all.
You catch my drift?

I even got her a present.
I just hope she gets the hint.

THE LOVER

-[knocking]
-Yeah, come in.

-Boss?
-Yeah, that's me.

An inmate's gone.

-What?
-Lopez.

-Who's Lopez?
-Well, he's the... the Legionnaire.

-The one...
-Yeah.

-He's not in his cell?
-No.

Oh, okay, uh...
All right, stay calm. Don't panic.

Must have gone to spend Christmas Eve
with his buddies.

Get everybody.
Let's search the cells now.

-What about the chaplain?
-You mean the volunteers?

They're at reception
for the Christmas party.

You mean the nun.
I'll get her out of there in no time.

Yeah, well, I'm sorry.
That's just how it is.

-Christmas is canceled this year.
-What's that supposed to mean, huh?

What are you doing here?
You're supposed to be off.

I'm volunteering. What's going on?
Why is there no Christmas?

Oh, no, nothing happened.
No, no, I was just kidding around.

Inmates spending Christmas
away from their families, that's no joke.

-Yeah, you're right.
-Please excuse him, Sister.

He's got no heart.

That's kind of useful
in your line of work.

I'm just kidding around. You're not
the only ones with a sense of humor.

[chuckles] Yeah, sorry. Go on through.

-Thank you.
-[Jeff] Merry Christmas, okay?

[Corrine] No, I'm not working tonight
because I just want the inmates

to have a good Christmas.

Every now and then,
it's important they forget about prison.

They don't get much time
with their families, unfortunately.

-Excuse me, Corinne.
-Hmm?

I really don't mean
to tell you what you have to do,

but tonight you're not supposed
to be here playing watchdog.

What? Um, yeah, of course. I know that.

-Good.
-I'm just here to lend a hand.

Great. Then you won't mind grabbing
some trash bags for us, okay?

Thank you, Corinne.

Good evening. Is Lopez here?

[inmate] No.

Oh, yeah, okay, I got one.

What's your favorite sex position?

Wow. You don't waste any time.
Good thing I didn't pick dare.

-Good evening. Is Lopez here?
-[inmate] No, he's not here.

[inmates clamoring]

-So?
-I like being on top.

Oh! So you're into
that whole domination thing, huh?

Why? You like being submissive?

Hey, I didn't pick truth, okay? Uh...

Evening, officer.

Oh, wait. So now it's my turn, right?

-I'll pick dare. Let's go.
-Yeah, shut up.

Oh, man. That's harsh, bro.

I've had this about 15 years.

{\an8}I bring it out every Christmas.

{\an8}FOR MOM
JONATHAN

{\an8}[sighs] I wouldn't trade it for the world.

[sister] How are you?

-[Corinne] Okay.
-What on earth is that?

Come on, we've got enough decorations
as it is. That's a bit much, okay?

Come on, it's Christmas.
One more decoration won't hurt.

Just look how pretty it is.
The kids are gonna love it.

No, what would make those kids excited
is having their father with them,

you know, on Christmas morning
when they open their presents.

Covering the entire place with ornaments

isn't gonna make them forget
that they're in prison.

Besides, it's garbage. I'm putting it
away, because honestly... Ugh.

[Corinne] Tonight I'm volunteering,
and like all the other volunteers,

I'm under Sister Valentine's authority.

Even though, personally,
I think the church is a cult.

There, I said it.

-[Stéphanie] Truth.
-Ah, who gives a sh*t about truth?

Let's just have some fun, man.

-Okay, dare. Go on.
-[laughs]

-Okay.
-[Jeff over radio] Control to B1.

We've got a lead on Lopez. Get over here.

What a shame.

Yeah, we're coming.

-You still owe me a dare, okay?
-Yeah, whatever.

-I'll come up with a fun one.
-Mm-hm.

I checked everywhere.
He couldn't have left the building.

This is the last time he's caught on
camera. It was from the workshop earlier.

[JP, rapping]
Yo, fellas, I'm losin' my mind

Yeah, fellas, you're gonna pay this time

Yo, fellas, I'm about to crack

Yeah, fellas, better watch your backs

{\an8}-Whoa, yo, fellas, I'm losin' my mind...
-Hey! Get back here!

{\an8}-Leave it, leave it. It's fine.
-You gonna walk off?

{\an8}I don't wanna get ahead of myself,
but I think he's got it in for you.

-I'll k*ll you!
-Wait a minute.

-Isn't Lopez the one who was--
-Yeah, that's him.

Wow, man. That's no joke. You're toast.

What do we do, then?

Don't worry, man.
No one touches my underlings.

[Jeff] Last month I tracked a wild boar
for four miles,

following its tracks through the mud.

I'm not the kind to give up the hunt, no.

Even the craftiest game
always ends up making a mistake.

You gotta know your prey,
and know how to use the right bait.

[Jeff] Here.

What the hell
am I supposed to do with this?

In case he attacks.

WORKSHOPS
CHENOISE DETENTION CENTER

[JP grunts]

I'm not sure that'll hurt much, though.

[sighs] No, you blow the whistle,
we move in.

Hey, don't show him you're scared.
He might smell your fear.

[laughs]

Man, am I glad
I made another pot of coffee earlier.

Come on, champion.

-Why are you locking me in?
-Well, in case he escapes.

Go on.

[JP] Lopez?

I'm sorry about the coffee!

I'll make you another one
if you want, okay?

I'll fix it however you want.
Cream and everything. You take sugar?

No, honestly, it's amazing
everything you do for us.

Even all the stuff you put up.
Looks pretty nice.

Look at all the garlands.
You really went all out.

Oh, you know,
I'm only here this one night.

But someone's watching over you
all year long.

That's right.

God, of course.

[chuckles]

The garlands were my idea!
They took two whole days to make!

And she shows up last minute
with her arms full of presents.

Oh, please. To get people's love,
I don't need to buy their affection.

Excuse me. Could you wrap this one?

Look at that.

My boy's been begging me for one.

Is it for a kid?

Uh, yes.

Well, he's not here, I'm telling you.
You can see for yourself.

Up there.
Go. I've got you covered.

-Not happening.
-[Jeff scoffs]

Go on, JP.

Didn't you say dare earlier?

What? No, it's...

[JP] What the hell are you doin'?

Looking for your ba*ls. [laughs]

Oh, you can't you take a joke? Come on.

Move over.

Uh...

[grunts] Hang on.

[grunts]

[grunts]

-Thanks.
-Yeah, you're welcome.

Yeah, of course, yeah.

These decorations are beautiful.
You really outdid yourselves.

-I'll let you get back to it.
-Really feels like Christmas.

You made this place feel special tonight.

-Did you choose the garlands?
-Hang on. If you'll excuse me a minute?

Yes, of course.

Excuse me, Corinne.
Could I have a word?

-Um, uh...
-Oh! Yes, of course, yes.

I know you're trying,
but I really have this feeling

your presence
is making the inmates nervous.

What?

No, they know I'm here for them.
You're wrong.

Does that one know? Just look at him.
He can't even look you in the eye.

You can tell he's terrified.

What I'd like is for them, just for
one evening, to forget they're in prison.

When they look at you, they don't see
a volunteer who's here to care.

All they see is their prison life.
They see oppression.

-They even see racism, Corinne.
-What? You're absolutely wrong.

I just want them
to have a merry Christmas.

If you really want them
to have a merry Christmas tonight,

I believe it would be so much better
if you left.

Please don't take it the wrong way.

They just want one cool,
drama-free evening together.

That's all.

[Jeff] See anything up there?

It's too high up.
I can't see a damn thing here.

Hold on.

[yells]

-[inmates yelling]
-[inmate] Turn the f*cking light back on!

Yo! Hey, turn the light on!

-[Jeff] Anybody seen my flashlight?
-[Stéphanie] Ow!

[Jeff] Sorry!
I'm just looking for my flashlight.

-[Stéphanie] It's right here.
-[Jeff] Where?

[Stéphanie] Up your a*s. [laughs]

Ow! Oh! Oh!

-Are you okay?
-Ow. Yeah.

[groans, exhales]

Uh, where's JP?

-[Stéphanie groans]
-JP?

JP!

Uh, what are you doing there?

Oh. You found the flashlight?
That's what I was looking for.

Hope we didn't blow out the whole place.

-[radio crackles]
-Corinne to Jeff.

What's going on?
We just lost power in here.

Jeff? Do you read me?

Well, that's why. You plugged everything
into one power strip.

That pulls a lot of power.

Well, I made the assumption
that it was all those ugly garlands.

What about the backup generator?

-It's empty.
-What do you mean, it's empty?

Well, according to the warden,
fuel's just too expensive.

But don't worry. The power company's
coming tomorrow morning.

-Tomorrow morning?
-Yeah.

I think it's probably best
to cancel Family Christmas.

-Cancel Christmas?
-Mm-hm.

Please, Corinne, just this once,
think about the inmates a little.

No, come on. We're not canceling anything.

-[Jeff] Mm-mm.
-You, hurry up. Go greet the families.

You, with me, come on.
Let's get the candles.

Somebody went a little crazy decorating.

Up, up with your hands.

[inmates clamoring]

-You scared?
-A little bit.

Oh, don't be.
As long as you stay with me, you're safe.

Come on.

-[smoke alarm blaring]
-You got the keys? Come on.

[inmates clamoring]

Open it! Come on!

[JP] Oh, f*ck.

[Stéphanie] Holy sh*t!

[smoke alarm stops]

[JP] Come on,
why are you doing this?

What? It's Christmas and there's no power
and we can't even fix a meal.

[Stéphanie] You think we're electricians?

What?
Hey, y'all want me to flip out, you f*ck?

I'm not even playing. I'm gonna--

-What are you doing?
-Will you quit yelling at me already?

Yo, I'm gonna f*ck you up.
What the f*ck's wrong with you?

[inmates banging on door]

He's messed up in the head.
I won't let him talk to me like that.

[inmate] I'll f*ck you up!

Hell, no, man.
I don't mess with booze.

Alcohol's bullshit.
Stay away from that, kids, all right?

[Stéphanie] I'm not drunk, okay?

I'm just the kind of girl
who says what's on her mind, that's all!

And I just wanted to tell you
that it isn't your fault!

It's just, you're, you're here!
So, yeah, you know what?

-It is your fault!
-Let's go, okay?

-Let me go!
-Calm down.

Hey! Don't film this!

Ugh! Where are those damn candles?

-There they are. Perfect.
-[clang]

What the heck was that?

I don't like this.

Stay here. I'll check it out.
Don't move. Wait for me here.

I'll come right back. Okay?

[keys jangle, lock clicks]

Personally, I'm for separation
of church and state.

Sorry. I'm gonna have to pat you down.
It's procedure.

Hey, hey, don't be scared. You'll be fine.

Just checking you got nothing dangerous,
okay? Any weapons?

There you go. Nothing to worry about.
[chuckles] You know, I'm a nice guy.

Just not with people who are naughty.

-Okay, move along.
-Coming through, folks. Excuse me.

Coming through.

-Hi, Philou.
-Hey, Jeff. Hi.

-Hey, Croquette.
-Here. Bring him back to me tomorrow.

-You're not staying with me?
-No, I can't. My kids are home alone.

-I gotta get home.
-You sure?

-Watch him, okay?
-Okay.

-I'm off. See ya. Bye. Excuse me.
-[growls]

Come on, Croquette, sniff.

Come on. Search! Lopez. Search.

[barking]

Go on, get him.


ARRIVALS

[Christmas music playing]

Yeah, that's right. Absolutely, yeah.

So, are your kids
coming to see you here tonight?

I don't have kids, so, no.
Well, maybe soon.

[volunteer] Are you seeing anyone?

Yeah, my girlfriend.
Soon my fiancée, God willing.

-[gasps] Oh, that's nice.
-Yeah.

-Can you tell me what her name is?
-Sabryina.

Oh! What a pretty name.

Yeah, she's amazing.
And, man, she's so damn hot, I swear.

I ain't gonna lie,
she's the reason I keep going.

I'd have k*lled myself
if she wasn't around.

[volunteer] You shouldn't say that.
You have your whole life ahead of you.

No, no, I'm just saying,
I'm pretty sure she's the one.

She makes me wanna quit that dumb sh*t.
I think I'm gonna have kids with her.

-[volunteer] Oh, what a nice idea!
-Yeah.

[volunteer] Not to mention,
it'll settle you down a little.

-Exactly.
-[volunteer chuckles]

Is it really that hard to find a nice guy
who's faithful and single,

who's got a clean record?

Hmm? And doesn't live with his mom?

-Hey, you know what? I'm done with you.
-Come on. I'm just kidding.

[chuckles]

Hey, you're actually cute when you sulk.

[thudding]

[Stéphanie chuckles]

Would you please say I'm cute again
somewhere with a little more light?

[inmate] Officer!

See that big red package with the stars
over there?

It's for the young man in the blue jacket.

-Okay.
-Okay, great. Amazing.

-How are you, Stéphanie?
-I'm good. And you?

-Having a good time?
-It's awesome.

-Oh, isn't this wonderful? See?
-[chuckles]

-It's awesome.
-Yeah. It's amazing. It's amazing.

It's wonderful.

Um, I was hoping I could ask you
for a little advice.

-Hmm?
-Because I have, um...

I've got a girlfriend,
uh, communication with her son has, uh,

pretty much broken down.

Hmm.

So she made herself a fake profile
to talk to him.

She what?

Well, come on, let's not...
We're not here to judge anyone.

To each their own.
But that's not the problem.

The problem is
her son fell in love with her.

-[gasps]
-And--

My God, that's
such a disgusting thing to do!

-That's the kind of friends you've got?
-Mmm.

Well, she's my friend,
but, I mean, she's... um, I know her...

Well, I don't even... I mean,
she's barely an acquaintance.

If you want my advice, Corinne,

you need to stay very, very far away
from that woman.

She's dangerous. You saw what
she was capable of doing to her own son.

Just imagine what she could do to you.

-Oh, yes. Yes.
-Just imagine.

Do you have any idea
how much love can hurt?

Do you know how hard it is
to love somebody?

No, no, you're absolutely right.

A hundred per cent.
I'm cutting her out of my life.

Cut her off.

Mmm. Cut her off. I mean, cut contact.

-You got some... It's running...
-Yeah.

-You want a little orange juice?
-No, I'm good.

The oranges are really good.

[upbeat music playing]

Come on, loosen up!

[slurring] You know with lions,
it's the lionesses that do the hunting?

And me, I was raised by my mom
and my grandma.

They're lionesses, straight up.

I'm also a lioness.
If you know what I mean.

Here. I got a little present for you.

-You're my present.
-[grunts]

Yeah, I like having fun an' all, you know,
but I'm gonna be 44 pretty soon.

Maybe it's time to start a family.
Wouldn't you agree?

Find him. Come on, Croquette.
Find Lopez.

Yeah, come on. Find him.
Yeah, good boy. That's it. Find Lopez.

-[yells]
-[yells]

-What the heck are you doing here?
-Waiting for Corinne.

But you can't stay here, Sister.
It's dangerous.

-Dangerous?
-Well, yeah.

There's an inmate loose in the building.

Hang on, give me a minute.
I'll take you back to the others.

But is this inmate on the loose dangerous?

Yeah. That's why you can't stay here
by yourself.

But don't worry. We're tracking him,
uh, with the dog, Croquette.

We're about to find him.

But where is the dog now?

-Croquette!
-[barking]

Come here!
Hang on, Sister! I'll be right back!

[cheery music playing]

Excuse me, boss,
but the Santa Claus over there...

-Hmm?
-Isn't that Lopez?

Yeah. I saw him in the workshop.
He was really upset over some coffee.

I didn't quite get it. I think it was
because he was spending Christmas alone.

So I gave him something to do.
Now look how happy he is.

-[barking]
-Go, Croquette! Find Lopez! Sic him!

-[Corinne gasps]
-[barking]

-[Lopez yells]
-[inmates and guests yelling]

-[Lopez grunting] No!
-You shouldn't be here.

-You thought you could get away from me?
-[Corinne] What the hell are you doing?

-I found him! We're good!
-The presents!

Come on. Come on. Give it to me!

[screams]

♪ Let there be ♪

♪ A merry
A very merry Christmas ♪

♪ Let there be ♪

-♪ A time full of joy ♪
-♪ Full of joy ♪

Come on, Corinne!
Let's just get outta here!

♪ Where magic never ends ♪

♪ Let Christmas be merry for us all ♪

One night!
I leave you the keys one night, and this?

-I'm very disappointed, Jeff.
-Sorry, boss.

[excited chatter and laughter]

See? Good thing we didn't cancel.

Hey, how about we go and grab a drink
at my place later?

Definitely. Definitely.

Okay, I just gotta tell my mom I'm not
coming home tonight, but, yeah, I'm in.

Mmm. Wow, you sure know
how to talk to women.

Don't worry 'bout me. There's plenty
of other stuff I know how to do too.

-Mmm.
-But we'll take it step by step.

[chuckles]

-Hang on. I'm gonna go tell her.
-Go on.

Boss? Boss. The firefighters'll be here
in five minutes.

-And this just came from Records.
-What is it?

There was a procedural error
in Samir Fayed's file.

-He has to be released.
-[Corinne] Oh, he's gonna be thrilled.

-Yeah.
-That's great news.

-Yeah.
-That is great. He's gonna be so happy.

-What?
-[Corinne] Awesome, awesome.

[Stéphanie] He's gonna be released!

[volunteer laughs] Oh, come on,
you can throw harder than that!

[inmate] Yeah. Yeah, my boy wants a
PlayStation, but, man, it costs a fortune.

I can't afford it.

-You all right?
-Yeah. And you?

Mm-hm.

Um... I actually wanted to talk to you.

I have to tell you something, and...

[sighs] ...it's pretty hard to say.

[Jonathan] Merry Christmas.

[Corinne] Oh!

No, no, it's just the snow.

It's beautiful. It's...
I mean, it must be a miracle.

A Christmas miracle.

Well, my girlfriend helped me realize
you've only got one mom.

-Oh, you have a girlfriend?
-Yeah, her name's Sabryina.

Oh. That's great.

Please help!

Is anybody there?

[clang]