18x07 - Gilligan's Island: A Conspiracy Theorist's Paradise

[bunniefuu]

-[♪ uplifting music playing]
-[door opens]

[Mac] They're online, Charlie!
They're online. [chuckles]

-[door closes]
-[Charlie] What's online?

I never knew this before,
but there are, like,
thousands of documents,

unredacted, about what actually
went down on that island.

-Like interviews,
salacious photos...
-Yeah, wow, dude, great.

Hey... [stammers] ...can you
tell me if this is hot enough?
I can't... I can't tell, man.

g*dd*mn, dude!
That's... that's boiling water.

I mean, yeah,
but is it boiling hot
or is it just boiling regular?

How is that not burning you?

I don't know. Perk of
the boiler man, I guess.

If you think that's hot enough,
we're good.

Dude, look how many documents
Frank dumped on us this year.

All these papers, dude.

I don't care about
Frank's documents, Charlie.

I'm talking about
online documents.
It's a treasure trove.

Well, I mean, we gotta focus
on the offline documents, dude.

It's boiling day, okay?

We got to boil and stain
all the year's paperwork, okay?

If we don't do that,
Frank's gonna be pissed.

Speaking of stain,
did you bring the dye?

-I got Kool-Aid.
-Uh...

-Yeah, that'll work,
I guess, yeah.
-Yeah, dude, ah,

this is so fascinating, like,
how deep this goes.

Powerful men, millionaires,
scantily-clad young women.

I mean, I think
we can finally figure out
what went down on that island.

-Mmm.
-Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?

Yeah, I'm thinking
with this Kool-Aid, actually,

these documents could
wind up being pretty delicious.

-What?
-I'm thinking maybe like a soup

or a stew or something.
Good plan, Mac.

Did-did you think that
that's what I was thinking?

Because, like, then we're
not just throwing them
in the trash all stained up.

We're going to eat them
and then poop them, flush them,

and then they'll
really be gone.

I've been saying the word
"online" and "island," like,

over and over and over again,
so it doesn't make any sense.

Yeah. You're going on
and on and on about that,

but, dude, I'm not really,
like, a current events guy.

Current events?

What island
do you think I'm talking about?

Scantily-clad women.

Millionaires.

Soup is not involved.

I'm trying to do a thing

-where I need you...
- Gilligan's Island.

...and then you were
gonna say... Yeah, you got it.

-That was it? I knew it.
-Yeah, but I...

[sighs]
I thought you were gonna say--

Was there another island you
could have been referencing?

Epstein's Island, and then
I was going to be able
to deliver that in a cool way.

-But it is Gilligan's Island ?
-Yeah.

[♪ "Temptation Sensation"
playing]

[Charlie] It is actually
super weird that they
never got off the island.

That's the tip of the iceberg
with this show, Charlie.

There's, like,
a whole conspiracy about this.

They... They didn't do
a hundred episodes.

Okay, so?

A hundred. 100.
Do you know what 100 means?

One less than 200, go on.

-No, that would be 199.
-199 one hundreds?

-That's like a billion,
isn't it?
-[stammers]

A show needs to make
to get into syndication,

and then
if it gets into syndication,
it makes money forever.

Oh.

So why stop one short?

Maybe somebody
wanted it stopped.

-Right.
-[Frank] All right,
all right, just...

just throw 'em anywhere.

-[Charlie] What? Whoa!
-Don't worry about it.

What is this, dude?
We're already
up to our ears in boxes.

-You're k*lling me here.
-This is a busy year.
A lot of schemes.

What the hell are you guys
complaining about?
At least you get to be inside.

Yeah, he's got us
painting the outside
of the bar in a monsoon.

They destroy the documents.
You repaint the bar.

-I lie to the accountant.
Tradition.
-Yeah.

-He's got a living heir.
-Who? The accountant?

Sherwood Schwartz,
who's the creator of
Gilligan's Island.

-He's got a grandson.
-Okay, so?

Charlie, take this
to its logical conclusion.

If he's got
a living heir, then...

-[Charlie gasps dramatically]
-Ooh.

What?

We pitch him the final episode
and finally give the
Schwartz family the episode--

We can finally give
the Schwartz family
the end and we can get...

-We can get Gilligan's
into syndication.
-Stop, stop.

Mac, you have been
talking about
Gilligan's Island nonstop

for the last 48 hours.
I don't know
what the f*ck is going on.

Nobody's conspiring
to stop Gilligan's Island

from making 100 episodes.

That's ridiculous.

If anyone's conspiring,
it's the g*dd*mn government
taxing us endlessly.

What are they even
spending it on? I mean...

Aliens, and not
the Mexican kind,
the ones from outer space.

-I saw
a whole documentary on it.
-I saw that too.

-Did you see it?
-That was crazy.

-[Frank, Mac] Yeah.
-Where they're-they're in
the ocean--

To steal our technology.

[Charlie] They're down there
trying to steal our tech.

-It's the Bluetooth.
-It's the Bluetooth.

-They're after the Bluetooth.
-[Frank] Yeah.

Aliens are traveling
across the galaxy... [chuckles]

...with that technology
to steal our technology,

Bluetooth, that never works

and never pairs
with our printers
that also never work.

Good theory!
All right, just stop drinking
the Kool-Aid.

I only drank, like,
a little bit of it, so...

That's not what
I was talking about.

I was talking about
the metaphorical Kool-Aid.
You happen to be drinking both.

All right? Listen, guys.

Boil, toil, and for
the love of God, stop talking
about Gilligan's Island.

-[Dennis] Come on, let's go.
-[Frank] We got
more documents to get.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Hey, Charlie?

I got to show you something.

[♪ Gilligan's Island
intro music playing]

-Right?
-Uh, yeah.

Gilligan, the Skipper too,
the millionaire and his wife,

the movie star and the rest.

And the rest.

Is there anything strange
about that opening to you,
Charlie?

Yes, dude, like,
where was the color?

Oh, they... they went to color
in season two.

Oh, yeah, okay, cool.

Can you imagine being there
when people became color?

Like, what that was like
for everybody?

Look around and being like,
you know, like,

"Oh, God,
we're all color now," like...

Crazy time.

You know, people have
always been color, right?

Since season two
of Gilligan's Island,
you're saying.

Either way, we're focusing on
the wrong things, okay?

We need to figure out

why they didn't want us
thinking about
those two characters.

"And the rest"?
Why not just say their names?

Okay, so, the Professor,
he is a man of science.

He can make a radio
out of a coconut,
but he can't fix a boat?

Weird, actually,
when you think about it.

I think the Professor is
the linchpin that blows
this whole thing wide open.

Professor, yeah, yeah.
Too bad we can't talk
to him, yeah.

Maybe we can.

[♪ comical music playing]

What do they put
in these things?

[audience laughing]

[chuckles]
Isn't this cool, man?

Look, if you're gonna solve
a conspiracy, you gotta have
some good reenactments.

Dude, how did we get here?

In our minds.
We're imagining it
as we're talking about it.

-It's just so much more fun.
-Oh.

-That is a good way to do it.
-Yeah.

There you two are.

Oh, Dennis is the Professor.
That makes sense.

Well, yeah, it makes sense.
Again, we're the ones
imagining it.

We're in your apartment
talking about it,
imagining this happening.

We're imagining, yeah,
we did say he would be
the Professor.

-Okay, I get it.
I get what's going on.
-You got it?

Use this brush to keep
the fire going for the stewpot.

We'll head to
the other side of the island
to harvest the giant vegetables

from the radioactive seeds.

-Whoa, radioactive seeds.
Good pot.
-[Mac] Oh.

[Frank chuckles]
Reporting for duty, Professor.

We hear that manual labor
is very rewarding.

Right, Lovey?

Well, it'll be most rewarding
when it's over.

-[audience laughing]
-Yeah. So funny.

g*dd*mn it,
why am I Mrs. Howell?

-Because I'm
imagining you as her.
-[Dee] No, no, no, no.

-I gotta be Ginger or Mary Ann.
-[Frank] Mmm.

You know,
'cause I've got, like,
the glamour of a movie star

mixed with that, uh, spunky,
girl-next-door charm.

Dee, you have neither.

You are a hollowed-out husk
of a woman way past her prime.

-[audience laughing]
-You're more Mrs. Howell.

-What?
-Should I be the Skipper?

Why are they arguing with us
if it's our imagination?

Well, we're
a very argumentative crew,

-and I'm just
imagining them fighting...
-[Charlie] Yeah, for sure.

-...over everything
all the time.
-Arguing happens constantly.

Yeah, you know what else
I'm picturing?

[yelps] Ow!

-[audience laughing]
-Oh, g*dd*mn it!

You coconuted her,
and you're picturing her
in pain, which is funny.

No, that really hurt.
Fine, fine,
I'll be Mrs. Howell.

Yeah, no. I'm okay as I am.
Come on, Lovey.

Those vegetables won't harvest
themselves. [chuckles]

-Come.
-If only!

-Let's go.
-Yeah, before you get
another coconut.

[stammers] He didn't wanna
get coconuted. [chuckles]

Oh, hey, hey, Professor,
a word.

Um, hey, before you get started
on those vegetables, um,
can I ask you a question?

Why don't you just fix
the boat?

-[♪ comical music playing]
-Fix the boat?

Yes, like, fix it
and get us off the island.

Yeah, I mean you built that.
You're talking about
radioactive sh*t.

Yeah, you got a wheelbarrow,
you got a house...

As far as I know,
there's just a hole in a boat.

It's just a hole in the boat,
so you want to try to use
the wheelbarrow tech.

Well, I suppose from
an engineering standpoint,
I could use--

Ah-ah-ah, Professor. [chuckles]

If we don't get going,
the vegetables will be eaten up

by the wild animals
before we can get to them.

The birds.

You can't trust the birds.

[Professor]
You're absolutely right.

The vegetables are vulnerable.

Boat talk can wait.

-[Mac grunts]
-Whoa.

-That was weird, dude.
-That was weird.

-Yeah, what does she mean
about the birds?
-Yeah.

-You can't trust the birds?
-What?

-What's up with the birds?
-No, no, I meant that
the Howells

were stopping the Professor
from fixing the boat.

The birds are... They've got
nothing to do with it, dude.

[stammers]
You're off on the wrong foot.

Yeah. You know, speaking of
the wrong feet, I think I put
my shoes on backwards.

[audience laughing]

That is so stupid.
That is the dumbest joke.

Why do you keep
getting a laugh track, huh?

I'm just... I'm picturing
getting a laugh track.

-Don't whack me.
-And then they...

-[audience booing]
-What is that?

It's some boos and some "oohs"
and some "ahs."

-It's not an "ooh" show.
-It is now.

-[audience laughing]
-[Mac groans]

-This is bullshit.
This is bullshit.
-There we go. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-Hey man, why no girls, right?
-Oh.

Ginger, Mary Ann, like,
why aren't we picturing them?

'Cause I hate women and I
don't want to think about them.

-Oh, is that why?
-Yeah, look...

Do you mind if I just
picture them really quick?
No, it's all right. I--

No. You're thinking about
the wrong things.

Look, man, we got to get
into Sherwood Schwartz's head.

-Right.
-Wh... What did he
want us to think?

The man was a genius.
What was he trying to tell us?

I mean, this is the guy
that created The Brady Bunch
and Gilligan's Island.

-Right. Okay,
he's giving us clues. Uh...
-Yes.

Islands, uh, kids, uh,

-yeah, it's all come
full circle.
-[audience laughing]

This is so stupid.

It's not even up to
Sherwood Schwartz's standards.

-Hey!
-[audience booing]

That? It's just not a boo show,
okay? It doesn't boo.

-They don't boo anything.
-Can we just boil?

Because that's what
we're supposed to be doing.

Yeah, why are we getting
relegated to boiling?
It doesn't make any sense.

-You know what?
I think these are done.
-What are?

The documents.
These are good to go, man.

Radioactive vegetables.
What was Schwartz
trying to tell us?

The Howells were rich
and powerful.

-Rich, yeah.
-So the... [stammers]

Like, controlling science,
chemicals...

Maybe he was trying to warn us
about chemtrails.
I gotta figure this out.

Well, I gotta take this
to the trash chute

before I leave a chemtrail
in my apartment. [chuckles]

I miss the laugh track, yeah.

[door closes]

[♪ suspenseful music playing]

[Dee echoing]
You can't trust the birds.

[Charlie] Bird! Bird!

Dude, I saw a bird, like a...
[stutters] ...carrier pigeon.

Okay, watching me
dumping the documents.
Remember what the Howells said?

"You can't trust the birds."
They said it themselves, dude.

And there's a bird out there.

-Holy sh*t, dude.
-Right?

I'm thinking, like, maybe it's
a government spy or something

that's gonna spy on us
and it's gonna tell our secrets
to the government.

-That's the only
explanation, man.
-That doesn't make any sense.

That's not what
I was talking about at all.

-Yeah?
-I'm talking about your shirt.

The logo from the receipt.

Oh, sh*t. Okay, I see that.
You know what happened, dude?

I don't think it boiled
all the way through.

That's on me.
That's my bad. I should've...
I should've looked closer.

No, I'm talking about
what the actual logo is.

That's Risk E. Rat.

-We haven't been
back there for years.
-Oh, sh*t. That's right.

Now why would Frank
have us boil, like, a really
old document like that?

We've already destroyed
those documents.

I smell a rat.

[♪ dramatic chord plays]

-[sniffs]
I smell that too, yeah.
-Yeah.

It's probably under the boxes.

-There's definitely a dead rat.
-Yeah.

-There's multiple dead rats.
-There it is. I see it.

-You saw it? Yeah.
-Yeah. I'll get it.

This one's for a Cybertruck

and this is for the water park.

-Yeah, dude, this is weird.
-[Frank] Whoo, whoo!

Oh, my goodness.

Whoo! You guys are so lucky
you're in here where it's warm.

-It's terrible outside. I--
-Hey.

-What am I looking at?
-You tell us, Frank.

The receipts, old receipts.
Why do you have us boiling
old receipts?

Yeah, what's the deal, dude?

Well, it's duplicates.

It's doubles.

That's the oldest
accounting trick in the book.

An accounting trick.
That's your explanation?

Yeah, accounting trick.

That does seem logical.

-You're buying that?
-Yeah, I think...

All right, but there's
weirder sh*t going on, Frank.

Like, what's your explanation
for, uh,

why the castaways never got off
of Gilligan's island, huh?
[scoffs]

Well, they did. They did.

-[Charlie] They did?
-[Frank] Yeah, they got off.

-They got off in the movies.
-What movies?

They made three TV movies,
and they got off the island,

but they had to get back
on the island

because there's no show
if they're off the island.

-[chuckles]
-TV movies? Wha... Wha--

Yeah, they had three of them.

-And the Harlem Globetrotters
were there.
-What?

-You know about this, Mac?
-[Frank exclaims]

Stop drinking the Kool-Aid.

-Get back to work.
-All right.

-Both of you.
-[Charlie] Okay.

-I gotta go back out and paint.
-Yeah.

[Frank] Is this white?

-[Charlie]
All right, good. Yeah.
-That's what I want. I'm going.

Talking about Globetrotters.
Dude, what is he talking about?

You remember
Harlem Globetrotters?

He's right. I forgot about
the movies 'cause I...

-you know,
I don't consider them canon.
-Seems crazy to me.

-So what happened
in the TV movies?
-What do you think, dude?

[♪ instrumental of
"Sweet Georgia Brown" playing]

-[Mac] Basketball.
-Mac, what the hell's
happening?

The Harlem Globetrotters
played robots

to save the island
from an evil billionaire.

What?
Dude, I didn't imagine that.

I'm imagining it
and I'm imagining all of him.

[audience laughing]

Don't make them laugh at that
because they weren't there yet

-with that kind of humor.
-Get off the court, Gilligan.

[audience cheering]

-Dee, what are you wearing?
-Made a helmet.

Now you can't conk me with
a coconut, you dumb b*tch.

-[audience laughing]
-[grunts] Professor, Lovey.

Uh, we have
some unfinished business.

-Oh. Yes.
-Yes, yes.

-[Frank grunts] All right.
-Oh. Yes.

-[exclaims]
That was close. That... Nah.
-[exclaims] Yeah.

-I'm sorry, man. I tried.
-Yeah.

All right, well,
what's the deal?
Where are they going off to?

Oh, there's this whole subplot
where Mr. Howell

steals the rare but valuable
mineral, supremium,
while everyone's distracted.

Supremium? You know, I
gotta say, none of this really
feels up to the standards

-of the Gilligan's episode
to me.
-It doesn't make any sense.

-No, right?
-Like, why would they let
the guy make

three nonsensical TV movies
but not a hundredth episode?

It's crazy, it's madness.

It's like they were, um...
[smacks lips]

Dude, look at the scoreboard.



[Mac] 101.

Sherwood Schwartz is trying
to send us a message
through this bad episode.

-SOS.
-SOS. I didn't get
my hundredth episode.

I didn't want it to be
this madness.

Robots and-and Globetrotters

and-and rare Earth minerals
with stupid names
like unobtanium.

Uh, oh, supremium, you mean.

Unobtanium is from Avatar ,
which is, like,

the highest-grossing
movie franchise of all time.

All right. Well,
then which one is vibranium?

Oh, that was
from Black Panther.
That's a mineral from Wakanda.

-Ah. Well, Wakanda forever.
-Wakanda forever, right?

-Yeah. Wa... Yeah.
-Wakanda forever.

Well, those are good names.
But-But supremium?

-Come on. That's just silly.
-That's stupid. Yeah.

Yeah, that's what I'm trying
to say. It just doesn't
feel real, you know.

[Charlie] You know what?

-I don't think
that bird's real.
-Of course not.

[Charlie] Oh, no.
Not that bird.
The one on the windowsill.

That bird... That bird's been
sitting there for days, man.

I've never seen it blink once.
It's not moving in the rain.

Kind of makes you think, like,
are birds real?

Birds are very much real,
Charlie.

-You're sure?
-That is a real bird.

-I'll show you.
-Yeah? You think?

It's just weird that
it's sitting there in the...

-[♪ tense music playing]
-What the...

Holy sh*t, dude,
this bird's fake.

-[screams]
-It's plastic.

I knew it!
Birds aren't real, dude!

My God, look, it's got, like,
a camera in its eye!

-[screams]
-It's been spying on us.

What? What is happening, man?
What is going on?

Mac, Mac! The bird in the hall!

The bird in the hall is
a camera! Come on!

There it is, dude.

Spying on us, man.

f*ck you, government spies!

[pigeon cooing]

-[Mac grunts]
-[pigeon squawks]

Oh, God.

-Oh. that was a...
That was a living one.
-That one was living.

-Yeah, that was...
that was real.
-That was living.

Well, now I'm confused.

Hang on.
Dude, it's not raining out.

[♪ tense music playing]

-Well, maybe it stopped.
-No, it was just...

It was just raining.

How can it not be raining here
and... [screams]

[stammers] It's raining.
What the...

-What is going on, dude?
-What is happening, dude?

[♪ suspenseful music playing]

-[Mac] Cricket?
-[Charlie] What?

What the hell are you doing?

Whoa! [exhales sharply]

Hey, doing what
I do best, baby.

Getting paid to spray.
[grunts, laughing]

Actually, uh, truth is
I'm usually on
the receiving end.

But no, Frank paid me to, uh,
clean your windows.

-Well, can you stop already?
-Oh, no.

No, no, no, no. Frank told me
to-to spray all day.

Yeah, I'm getting paid
by the hour, see?

See, I'm, uh... I'm saving up
to get my teeth sharpened.

Yeah, and not just
for protection.
It's actually more of a...

like a vibe thing,
you know what I mean?

-Can I ask you guys a question?
-He's not gonna
stop spraying, dude.

[Cricket]
You think I still got it?

Why would Frank
be wearing a raincoat
if it's not actually raining?

I don't know, dude. It's weird.
Okay, let's think about this.

He-He was kind of dressed like
the Skipper in the opening
of Gilligan's Island.

You know, when the weather
starts getting rough.

Well, if Frank is the Skipper,
then that makes you and I...

[♪ quizzical music playing]

-The rest?
-The bullshit side characters

who don't get to do anything

-while the rich and powerful
take over!
-We're the rest?

g*dd*mn it, dude. What...

-[♪ comical horn playing]
-Wait a second.

The paint can that Frank
took earlier, that was white.

Is this white?

-That's what I want.
-[Charlie] Dude,
what is going on?

[stammers]
The bar sign is green.
Why would he get white paint?

No, but you know what is white?

The White House.

You know what else is white?

Uh, probably, like,
Madonna's cars.

Yeah, we're gonna get on
the same page.

I promise we're gonna
get on the same page
at some point, yeah.

Baseballs.

Correct. And?

-Half a zebra.
-The b...

All of those are correct
but not pertinent to
what we're talking about.

Okay. Sure, I thought I had it.

-What's the name of the boat?
-The Love Boat.

The SS Minnow .

-Oh, yes--
from Gilligan's Island. Yes.
-Yeah.

It was white.
What are they up to?

-We gotta go to the bar.
-Okay.

Charlie, I figured it out.

They're not in there
fixing the bar.
They're fixing the boat.

They are pitching
Sherwood Schwartz's grandson
the hundredth episode,

leaving us stranded
on the island.

That's why
they were spying on us
with the pigeon camera.

Yes, yes. Think about it, dude.

The second that we start poring
through documents,
Frank comes in.

He... [stammers]
...redirects us.

Oh, my God, dude.

They don't want us
to find out the truth,
but we did. We did.

[stammers]
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
One second, one second.

Before we barge in there, dude.

Frank actually has paid Cricket
to wash our windows before.

It's just something
he's been doing
for the last couple of years.

And we set up hidden cameras
on each other all the time.

You know, try to keep
the other guy
from pounding off.

You never know
when there's a camera,
so you don't pound off as much.

Sure.

Maybe the tax guy
might be in there.

What if the tax guy's in there?

We might blow up
this whole thing.

We're gonna blow
the whole thing because
we didn't do our jobs, man.

We have been drinking
a lot of Kool-Aid, dude.

-Right. That's what I'm saying.
-I think maybe we... spun out.

We were so sure
about the bird in the hall.

-Look what happened
to the bird.
-Now we're out in the sunlight.

-I know!
-We've properly come
to our senses, right?

It's crazy to think they're
pitching Gilligan's Island

to the grandson of some dude.

-Like, what are
we talking about, man?
-We totally went crazy.

-We went crazy. We went crazy.
-We went crazy, man.

[Dennis] By applying
wheelbarrow technology
to a boat...

[Charlie, Mac exclaims]

-[Mac] I knew it!
The conspiracy is real!
-...we could... Oh, sh*t.

-Oh, you lied to us!
-Yeah! You're...
You're stealing our pitch.

-Are you stealing it?
-And you're Gilligan?

Uh, well, that actually tracks
because she's got
the same body...

-Yes.
-...but I don't love it.

This is bullshit. Have you guys
been working on this for years?

Well, we couldn't pitch
the episode idea with you guys.

Because you guys are all into
conspiracy theories and stuff.

-Constantly.
-There was a conspiracy.

You had us locked in the par--

-Give me the hat.
-[stammers] Stop it.

I'll tell you what,
get your own hat.
Get your own hat.

-[Charlie] Hey, hey! Stop!
-[Dennis] Okay.
All right, all right.

Hey. Yeah, so, um... [chuckles]
Yeah, okay.

So anyway, so, um...

So anyway, the Professor, uh,
realizes that he can use

the same wheelbarrow technology
to create a boat, and I...
you get it.

[chuckles]
What do you think, man?

Well, this is great. I would
love to see this episode.

-Really?
-You would?

-Oh, wow.
-[Frank] Wait.

Well, this would require
some back-end compensation.

Of course.

Okay, so, uh, how's this work?

You fly us out to Hollywood

or you want to put us in touch
with your agent or...

-My agent?
-[Dennis stammers]

-Or your grandfather's agent.
-His grandfather's agent.

I mean, yeah.

Oh, I'm so sorry. I-I think
I see the confusion here.

I'm not related to the creator
of Gilligan's Island .

W... What?

You got the same last name.
We looked you up.

-We did our own research.
-Yeah.

There's some confusion online.
People have mixed us up before.

My grandfather is also named
Sherwood Schwartz,

but he owns
a Laundromat in Albany.

-Dude.
-Oh, g*dd*mn you. g*dd*mn you!

What are you doing here
listening to our pitch

if you're not even related
to the guy?

I'm sorry, but you seemed
so passionate
when you approached me,

and I didn't want to
let you down.

I mean, thank you for this,
and, you know,

it is a shame they didn't get
a hundredth episode.

-You lousy basta--
-Oh, shut up!

-Get outta here!
-Get outta here, man!

[Dee] You don't get to
say that. Shut up! Shut up!

-[Dennis] Damn it!
-What a g*dd*mn waste of time!

-Yeah. Wow, we really
got worked up, huh?
-[Mac groans]

Well, we probably
shouldn't be believing
everything we read online.

-Oh, yeah.
-Maybe not everything is
a conspiracy.

Guys, we can't just
attribute meaning
where there just isn't any.

I mean, sometimes, guys,
there just is no "there" there.

[♪ comical music playing]

Hey, I got it, an ending that's
gonna make Grandpa proud.

The world's finally gonna get
all the answers.

Wait till everybody sees this.

Too bad they never will.

[silenced g*nsh*t]

[engine revs]

[tires squeal]

[♪ jovial music playing]

[electricity crackles]

[♪ jovial music continues]