02x01 - AG OG Lo Ji 5G

[bunniefuu]

FROM THE BEGINNING

There are 18 villages in our district.

But all fail before Dhadakpur.

The only village to celebrate 25 years
of being crime-free.

Wow!

They're destined for six happy lifetimes.

I'm not available on the 25th.

It's my first day at work.
In the big city, Mumbai.

-What happened?
-She had a general question.

Can't your younger son marry first?

Why do you care if I marry
the younger or the older brother?

Your job becomes permanent either way.

Now raise the budget!

A scooter won't cut it for him.

Kuber, show them.

Watch how my backward life
moves forward!

And mine… fast forward!

I'm a reeler. I make reels.
I'm off to Mumbai to become a superstar.

It's here.
The b*llet for Roshni's dowry.

Did my job permanency request
move forward?

Your file has moved to the senior officer.

b*llet or your life?

I'll give my life only to my love!

Your life is in my hands, idiot.

Please, listen…

Teepu, he's stealing.

Teepu! Teepu, he's stealing.

A robbery in Dhadakpur?!

Impossible!

You'll be a candidate
for the Village Chief!

Talk to Madam Pushpalata.

If you complain to the cops,
Dhadakpur's record will break.

I have a plan.

Why are you being
so generous to Dhadakpur?

I'm not here for Dhadakpur.

I'm here for Roshni.

A second-hand b*llet.

I don't have a single rupee left.

The village can help raise one lakh.

-Is something going on between you two?
-I hope so.

Pintu Bro!

His day job is dealing in bikes.
But he moonlights as a dancer.

Do you still have feelings for me?

We were kids.
It was a crush.

It's a forever kind of love now.

Did you say something?

Pose, click, snap
Take my photograph!

Six months from now,
I can imagine Roshni

sitting in a locked room and sobbing.

Thanks to your idiotic brother-in-law.
I won't take the b*llet back.

My father thinks of me
as a good-for-nothing idiot.

Once in my life,
I want him to hug me and say,

"Bhugol Banwari Jha, I'm proud of you."

Listen to me.

Please, Pintu Bro!

One traitor is enough to sink a ship.

Trophy, ticket, clean water,
and respect, we lost it all!

If I give you the mastermind's name,

will you make me a government witness?

-Mastermind?
-Mastermind?

Where's the b*llet?

What?

Stop the music!

What are you, boss?

Nobody!

I challenge you.

In one year,
I'll go to the city on my own merit.

I'll be self-sufficient.

Had you asked me nicely,

I would've withdrawn
my candidacy happily.

Why devise such a complex ploy?

But who will keep the b*llet?

Everyone has contributed to buying it.

Bhugol, you've gone viral.

Someone released
your gender-bender video.

I've gone viral!

I've gone viral!

The world you have just come to see

no longer remains crime-free.

Summer heat gives way to winter breeze.

Villagers drink hot tea

so they don't sneeze.

Everyone's out in the sun
swapping stories, having fun.

The coveted bike doesn't stay
just for a day,

but a joyride for a whole week
that you can enjoy.

MR. BANWARI JHA

The Jha family got so much flak

for sending the wedding procession back!

Permanent job is down the drain.

Now unemployment is his biggest pain.

Bhugol's a rage,

dancing on every stage.

The SSC exam

has put Roshni in a jam.

The house is falling apart,
just like Banwari's life.

His daughter is his only hope
in this time of strife.

Banwari is passing each day
with this faith.

Will she win the battle?

Dhadakpur waits… Even the cattle.

Will you be able to do it?

In one year,
I will go to the city on my own merit.

I'll shop in a mall with my own money

and watch a movie in a cinema.

-I'm saying this in front of a camera.
-I am getting disturbed, Papa.

I was trying to motivate you, dear.

-Don't!
-Oh!

-Come and sit down.
-Yes, yes.

Sit down.

Okay.

-It is inauspicious.
-Yes, yes.

How… How much?

I would have scored more
if you hadn't disturbed me.

How much did you score
after getting disturbed?

-Sixty.
-Sixty.

That's a good score.

Come and eat your meal. Come.

-Sixty?
-You haven't eaten a thing since morning.

-Sixty.
-You've been studying all day. Come. Sit.

Hold on. Hold on.

What score would you need
to outshine Kuber?

-Like seventy.
-Seventy.

Only eight days are pending
for the exams. Eat now.

The Earth rotates eight times in eight
days, and she can't go from 60 to 70?

Don't underestimate her.

Give it all you got, my dear.

She needs food to give it everything
she's got, doesn't she?

-Yes. Eat. Wait.
-Come on.

Just so you don't feel lethargic.

-I'll eat in my room.
-Eat.

-Of course.
-Yes.

-Yes.
-Eat well.

Who will be the first female Officer
of Dhadakpur?

Roshni Jha.

Roshni Jha.

Who is the first female Officer
of Dhadakpur?

Say, Roshni Jha.

That's why I was not raising
my hand.

SSC PRACTICE SET-39

SAY HELLO TO 5G.

Mr. Banwari!

Hey, Banwari!

Why are you yelling?

What's the matter?

I filled the tank.

Ride it only if you can afford
to refill it.

Otherwise, you can hand it over
to Pappu as it is next week.

It will stay put just like
all my other problems.

Don't lose courage, Mr. Banwari.

More problems are set to follow you.

You purchased the two-wheeler
on Saturday, right?

It is Saturday again.

Meeting?

I've asked you all to come here today

to tell you something very important.

In search of greener pastures,

the youth are packing up
and heading for the city.

To curb this, we have a solution.

To provide the detailed information
on the matter,

Mr. Sheetal has joined us.

Come here, Mr. Sheetal.

Explain it to them.

First and foremost, greetings
to the beautiful people of Dhadakpur.

I am Sheetal Sahani,

representative of Teer Tarang
Mobile Company.

Will you give us jobs?

Employment has become a game
of musical chairs lately.

I have come to offer Dhadakpur
a legacy that will endure.

5G mobile tower.

We'd be better off with free recharges.

Be quiet and pay attention to him.

Just be quiet. Why are you yapping?

This will give you a better network.

In fact, your mobile connection

has been cleared of every last hurdle.

Whether it be the breath-taking tension
of an India-Pakistan final over,

or the soul-stirring discourses
of the revered Premanand ji.

You can listen to it without hindrance.

To top it all off,

as a bonus,
the landowner will be granted

a one-time payment of two lakhs
to kick things off.

Two lakhs?

-That's right.
-Two lakhs?

A one-time of two lakhs to kick things
off for the first year

and 17000 rupees per month thereafter.

I possess an abundance of land.

Go ahead and erect three to four towers
on my land.

I will give it to you at a discounted rate
of 12000 rupees.

Construct one for me too.

Do you have land?

Erect it on my rooftop.

We, too, are landowners.

-Put the tower on our land!
-Listen!

-Erect it on my rooftop.
-Please, listen!

Everyone cannot get it.

Mr. Sheetal has identified
one piece of land.

The tower will be erected
only on that land.

-Okay.
-Whose land?

-Mr. Ghuttan…
-Thank you very much.

Please get out of the way.

The 5G tower will be erected
on Mr. Banwari's land.

What?

Oh…

Sir.

Wow.

SSC PRACTICE SET- 39.

Give me the cup.

Oh!

You turned the tea into a cold drink.

It slipped my mind, Mummy.

Don't fret it.

Don't mind him.

He's got too much time on his hands,

so he spends it breathing down your neck.

Besides, you are not competing with Kuber.

You are competing with yourself, sweetie.

You will score at least 60 percent.

Be grateful for anything over
and above that. Okay?

Oh!

What's the matter?
Why are you sweating it?

Something on your mind?

Mummy…

-Malti!
-He's here.

Continue with your studies.

-Coming!
-Malti!

-Malti!
-What's the matter?

-Why are you screaming?
-Malti!

-Malti.
-What's the matter?

-Eat this.
-Sweets?

No, no, it's simple.

You know the barren land we have?

-Did you find a buyer for it?
-No, no.

A 5G mobile tower will be erected on it.

We will get an advance of two lakh rupees

with a monthly rental of 17000 rupees.

Yes!

-Mummy!
-What?

Oh!

What's the matter?

Does this mean I won't have
to secretly borrow money

from Bhugol anymore?

What?

My beauty will bedazzle you

No gentleman to help undress,
don't stress.

Bring home the first of its kind
blouse with a front zip.

Open it quickly and close it easily.

Wear it swiftly and take it
off swiftly.

Quick job!

Available at only one place in the world.

Jhumroo Tailor, Shop number four,
Main Junction, Dhadakpur, Bihar.

Buy it soon.

Bhugol's got enough flair

to give any leading lady
a real run for her money.

Do I look like a heroine to you?

I'll shove this so far
into your belly button

you'll be twitching
on the floor like a dying fish.

Scram!

He's a hero.

Hero!

-Bhugol.
-Yes.

We have already got 1200 views.

Darn it! Scoundrel "blacknight.123"
has dropped a comment again.

What's he saying?

"You've got the grace of a lady
and the attitude to match.

I half expect to see you
sit sideways on a bike."

Bhugol,

Govinda played the role
of auntie in Aunty No. 1,

and Kamal Hassan played the role
of auntie in Chachi 420.

That is in the movies.

I have become a heroine in real life.

When I cover myself with a sheet at night,
it feels like a skirt.

When mummy tells me to come to dinner,
I say, coming, like a girl.

But yesterday took the cake, man.

I sat down to pee.

What do I do, Teepu?

Pee in a standing position.

What am I to do with
this feminine charade?

The true hero dwelling within me weeps
and writhes for liberation.

He constantly asks me,
"When will you go to Mumbai?"

The moment it screams,
show off this.

I've been doing that for a long while.

I've only managed to
save up 30000 rupees so far.

I will run out of money
before the month ends in Mumbai.

I would go if I could save up
enough money for one year.

How will you save up enough money

if you blow so much money
on clothing, shoes, and so on?

I will save up.

Dear hero,

do not die.

I will come to Mumbai.

The laughs you give today

The tears you'll bring someday

The laughs--

Yes.

Yes.

Why did you stop the jeep?

It stalled.

All of you, get off.

How can it stall out of the blue?

It notified me before stalling.

I received a call just now, right?

It was from the jeep.

Get off.

Will you get down here
or come with me?

Check your belongings.

I can't find my handkerchief.

I thought I'd have to turn
into a book to see you.

I've come here for my own problems.

Really?

Start.

For the past six months,

I've done nothing
but study around the clock.

But my mind drifts
when I am answering my test papers.

I don't understand it.

If it takes six men four hours
to build a wall,

how many hours will it take eight men
to build the wall?

I cannot remember when
the battle of Plassey took place

-or who Akbar's son was.
-Birbal.

Birbal was Akbar's son.

Everything is a joke to you.

Oh!

Sit down.

I am going to fail.

Kuber isn't going to fall
at your feet even if you pass.

All you did was challenge him.

If you don't succeed, then that's that.

The villagers mock me.

"Can you do it? Can you do it?"

How will I face everyone if I fail?

How will I face Papa?

He claims he got lucky the day I was born.

He is lying.

Who was responsible
for his humiliation in the village?

I was.

Who was responsible
for his losing his job?

I was.

Who is responsible for his poverty?
Even that is because of me.

I am responsible for all his stress.

I have got to restore his pride.

Papa's expectations can't
be broken even if it kills me.

Don't say that.

Calm down.

A passenger left it behind.

Had I known SSC would be
a matter of life and death for you,

I would have done something
about it long ago.

It's not too late, though.

Come.

Come.

Come, come.

Do you see the guy in the center?

Brajesh is a complete loser.
How did he pass SSC?

I asked him.

He dithered.

But a few drinks in,
and the truth was out.

He had the question paper
before the exams.

The actual papers?!

Actual papers.

But that would be cheating, Amavas.

So, cheat for once in your life.

When you make it,

use your honesty to make things fair

and settle every debt.

Okay?

Do I have your consent?

-We do not consent!
-We do not consent!

Why aren't you consenting today?

My father-in-law, Kadak Singh Ji, caught
a bug from drinking muddy water

and sadly passed away well
before his number was up.

Before his number was up?

He was born the day
the wheel was invented.

How much longer would he have survived?

-May he rest in peace!
-May he rest in peace!

I request the committee

to get a move on with the borewell
permit before a full-blown outbreak

takes hold of the town.

We don't have the funds, Mrs. Pushplata.

When you sit on that chair
after the next elections,

you can get the borewell made yourself.

That is, if you are voted into office.

And then I will solve all your problems,
not just mine.

That is the distinction
between you and me.

Sir.

Have arrangements been
made for this evening?

Of course, arrangements have been made.

Very well.

Mrs. Pushplata,

I hear a 5G tower is
being constructed in your village.

Yes.

Better watch out.

It emits waves that are profoundly
harmful to one's health.

What?

The word on the street
is that these emissions

significantly diminish masculine virility.

I never heard that.

You aren't active on social media.

Where?

That's exactly why you've missed the boat.

The 2025 medical results are out.

Wonderful!

Tea is a magic potion during winter.

Excuse me.

Hello.

Sure, I'll find out.

Okay. Goodbye.

Is it true

that these mobile towers result
in a diminution of masculine virility?

I don't know of masculine virility,
but my neighbor's mother-in-law.

-Okay.
-She had a tower installed on her property

and she started getting fits.

What about the mother-in-law?

Does anything ever truly
affect a mother-in-law?

Word is that mobile towers
are the biggest cause

of divorces in the city.

It depletes masculine virility.

Is that true?

It has been forwarded 1300 times, bro.

Nirmal!

Nirmal!

Do mobile emissions
deplete masculine virility?

Why are you asking me?

For the sake of our future.

A tower had been erected
near my uncle's home.

He lost four teeth in three days.

Something is surely happening, bro.

How did the common sparrow
end up disappearing?

How?

Thanks to mobile towers.

Golu mentioned that the 5G tower
causes buffalo milk to run low.

I am already feeling weak.

Look.

Look at what 5G can do.

Oh!

I have heard mobile
towers can cause hair fall.

A revelation from NASA.

Scientists have finally unearthed
the definitive cause behind the tsunami.

That's correct.

You will be baffled as
mobile emissions are responsible.

Can you believe this?

Why the hell should we all
have to suffer through a tsunami

just so one guy can line his pockets?

Sure, the land belongs to him,
but the village belongs to us all, right?

-That's right!
-Correct!

-Yes.
-You are right.

Let's go and talk to Mrs. Pushplata.

-Let's go.
-Come on.

That sounds like fake news to me.

Hey, charge Madan for
all the tea that we had.

"Sounds like fake news."

Return of our buffalo.

House repairs.

And the water heating rod.

-Yes.
-Right.

Cycle tire.

Anything else?

Ghuttan's outstanding credit.

Ghuttan can be paid anytime.

And something for yourself?

I don't want anything.

There must be something you like.

Can I buy you four blouses?

Pink, baby pink, blue, baby blue.

I don't want anything.
I shall sow what I have.

You must ask for something, Malti.

I asked you to buy me a mixer.
But that you didn't remember.

You're right. Mixer.

Never mind.
I told Bhugol to get one for me.

Who's the head of the family? Him or I?

What's the big deal?

Mummy!

Mummy!

Yes!

Throw the old stone away.
Here's a brand new mixer!

You really expect us to
eat spices ground in a mixer

you hauled in by shaking your booty?

That's twerking.

It's an African dance.

I've taken dancing
to a whole new level.

You want to see?

Gross!

You see that, Malti?

He's doing a good job.

Thanks to you, the master's got
zero respect left in the village.

Who master?

Bhugol!

Just because you earned a few bucks
you think of yourself as the top dog?

Malti, tell him we
don't want his dirty money.

You ought to be grateful
the tower is being constructed,

else you'd end up starving.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

I would starve, but I wouldn't accept
a dime from you.

-I wouldn't give you any!
-I wouldn't accept it!

-I wouldn't give you any!
-I wouldn't accept it!

-I wouldn't give you any!
-I wouldn't accept it!

-I wouldn't give you any!
-I wouldn't accept it!

-I wouldn't give you any!
-Hey, Bhugol.

Why are you screaming?

Go and hit your books.

He starts whining
over every little thing.

Hit the books?

You flunked and you're lecturing
her on studying?

Roshni's 60 percent score beats
your lifetime score, hands down.

Stick some cotton in
your ears and study, Roshni.

Land that government job!

You're the only one
who can restore my honor

that he's tarnished.

That's right. Go.

Malti.

Folks in the village are talking.

They say, Mr. Banwari,

we thought you had
given birth to a man,

so how'd you end up with a cabaret dancer?

You're doing that again.

-What am I doing again?
-This is too much, Mummy!

If he utters another word,
I'm out of here.

Do you mean that?

Where will you go?

Mumbai?

Return this mixer on your way.

Take this.

As if he'll go to Mumbai.

This is not right.

That boy has turned my life into
an African dance.

Bhugol!

I worked my fingers to the bone for that!

Where are you taking it? Stop him--

Bhugol!

Seems like they are waiting on us!

Come on, let's go.

We are here to return your sweets.

Pushplata,

you are not a man…

so a mobile tower
shouldn't have any effect on you.

Mr. Ghuttan's wife has passed away.
Why does he need virility?

As for Madan, the entire village
is aware that he lacks the mettle.

The tower causes a tsunami, too.

How can there be a tsunami
when there's no water body in the village?

There are too many other issues
with the tower!

Correct! That's right!

We will make a list and hand it to you.

If that tower were on his land,

there wouldn't be a single issue!

Fact is, you are jealous of me.

You are a jealous little gremlin!

-Jealous little gremlin?
-Yes.

-Jealous little gremlin?
-Yes.

You know what?

Out with it.
Pull out the money you owe me.

What is this?

What does the debt have
anything to do with this?

Return the money I loaned you.

-Take him away, Madan.
-Let's go.

Are you going to drag me away?

-How can I possibly drag you?
-You have to pull out my money!

Mr. Ghuttan.

-I will surely get it out of you.
-Let's go, Mr. Ghuttan.

Why are you pushing this hard?

Please come inside.

Let's go.

Wait.

This is my home,

not a guesthouse.

Show some mercy.

What do you want to
discuss with me in private?

It is a confidential matter.

You're mistaken. Look at this.

This.

In this relentless winter,
I walk with torn shoes.

Come in. I'll show you more.

This way, Mrs. Pushplata.
Look at the condition of the house.

Everything is in shambles.
Look.

Look at this plate.

All four of us eat from the same
plate, so we save on dish soap.

Look at this. Look at the house!

This ceiling could crumble any minute.

The entire family will disappear.
We'll be finished. Gone!

Come and take a look over here.

Here. Look at her blouse.

The fabric is so worn out.

Can't even fix this.

What are you doing?

That looks like a new mixer.

Yes.

Yes, yes.

Yes.

It's been taken out to sell.

It is a part of Roshni's dowry.

If I hadn't lost my job,
things would be fine.

I would have voluntarily
surrendered the tower.

But understand, if anyone is harmed
after the tower is made,

everyone will hold me responsible.

Those are rumors.
You can't rely on rumors.

That's possible, Mr. Banwari,
but I am helpless.

The pulse of a democracy
beats with a majority.

When I become the Headperson,

I will get you reinstated
to your position.

Meanwhile, if you require
oil, soap, or anything else,

I will send it over to you,
but forget about the tower.

Listen…

I shall lay out a spread
for the whole village on my account

when she becomes an Officer.

You will do it, won't you?

Good going!

Since I was in the cradle,
you have dealt me nothing

but a losing hand.

You even cursed me with a father
whose heart is made of stone.

With diligence,
I began every notebook

by dedicating it to you, Goddess.

And yet you orchestrated my every failure.

When I started making reels,
you didn't give me enough followers.

Out of the zillion followers you have!

How would it hurt you if you'd given me
a few million followers, Goddess?

And finally, you gave me followers

only when I danced like a heroine.

But it's okay.

I am granting you one last opportunity…

to redeem yourself.

I am going to Mumbai.

I will purchase the ticket.

As for talent, I have that.

But my only request is to

make me a superstar within
one month of reaching Mumbai.

My money will only stretch that far.

I'll end up on the street
beyond that, Goddess.

Can you do it, Goddess?

Do you have it in you?

Your destiny is etched with
a flaw that even the Gods might fear.

There is a major flaw in your horoscope.

What flaw, Pandit ji?

The feminine curse.

Why are you so depressed?

Imagine winning the jackpot,

only to realize you had read
the winning numbers upside down.

Okay?

You have troubled a woman

in your past life.

I was a dog in my past life.

Who told you that?

Papa.

Nonsense!

It is this very curse that has reduced you

to mimicking a woman's
grace in the dance of the shamed.

Without a remedy,

your grand Mumbai debut will
turn into a circus of humiliation.

My fate is in your hands.

I will follow your advice to the T.

Just break these karmic chains.

Your path to redemption
is in supporting a women

in her mission.

Shall I plough Aunt Sheela's land
on her behalf?

She struggles with it all day long.

Not that kind of help.

Well?

You are to be the wind
beneath a woman's wings

until she reaches her horizon.

And it must be done in good faith.

Once she harbors a true sense
of debt toward you,

her blessing shall serve
as the key to your liberation.

Then you will achieve superstardom.

Why, boss?! Why are you secretly checking
out my photograph?

Watch my video instead.

Actually, you could have watched me live
if you'd come to Mumbai.

But that's not happening! Clearing
the SSC exam is not possible for you!

You and your father

shall go to your graves
with empty pockets.

Bye-bye.

Take care.

Yours hatefully,
Kuber Tripathi,

SSC topper.

Roshni?

Tell me one thing?

Will it be a risk to get
hold of the question paper?

I'll handle it for you.

I want it.

It will cost money, Roshni.

How much will it cost?

Two lakh rupees.

Two lakh rupees?

You are talking about two lakh rupees.

What are you saying?

It is not a petty amount.

Just give me two minutes, Mr. Sheetal.

Please listen to me for two minutes.

Do you think two lakh rupees
is a paltry sum, Mr. Sheetal?

This money is my birthright.

I'll be damned if I let
it slip through my fingers.

The tower will surely be constructed.

Just arrange the question paper,

and I will arrange the funds!

SEVEN DAYS TO GO FOR ROSHNI'S EXAM!