01x06 - Finally got a good therapist

[bunniefuu]

ANNOUNCER: This program
is rated 14+,

and contains scenes of
violence, coarse language,

and mature subject matter.

Viewer discretion is advised.

I don't think they
can afford that house.

What do you mean?

I mean, like, I know
how much they both make,

and I'm like,
that's a $1.6 million house.

Well, they probably
got help.

Oh, did I tell you about
the getting high horny thing?

No. Oh, I hate
the word "horny."

Well, Michael was talking
about whenever he smokes,

he gets, like,
really horny.

And everyone was like, "Oh,
yeah, that happens to me, too."

And I was like,
"Uh, I-I don't know," so--

Wait, when you
guys went outside,

did you and Michael
go smoke?

[ Music plays on radio ]

No.
Are you saying that you're,

like, super
horned up right now?
No, I'm not horned up.

I was saying that happens
to other people.

And I was curious if it
was also happening to you.

Right.

We could do road head.

Oh. That'd be crazy.

Maybe one day...

[ Tires thudding over
uneven pavement ]

Hey, keep your eyes
on the road.

Eyes on the road.

[ Horn honking ]

Oh. Oh. Oh!
[ Horn blaring ]

Aah! Aah!

[ Engine revving,
tires squealing ]

[ Screaming ]

Babe, that was amazing.

g*dd*mn it.

Are your mid-30s guy friends.
Complete burdens.

Yeah.

Does the idea
of listening to them spiral

about their cookie-cutter
problems fill you with dread?

Yeah.

Introducing Jordoll.

Wow.

Wait. What's Jordoll?

Jordoll is a lovable,
placating,

plush version of you, Jordan.

So whenever you're sad sack
friends just need to vent,

they can talk at Jordoll
instead of you.

I'm so happy
that I married my wife,

but I miss being able
to sleep with other people.

That's really hard, man.

Have you guys ever explored
ethical non-monogamy?

It's a great question.

I want to have
the conversation about it,

but I'm not sure what
she thinks.

I'm lost, man.
I'm just--

I'm 36 and I have nothing
to show for myself.

I want to reality check
you right there.

You have an amazing job,
you're so good at guitar,

and you're
a good-looking dude.
Thank you.

Jordoll handles all
those tiresome ruminations

so you can do anything

other than soak in
another man's despair.

Jordoll validates and placates

so you don't have to get sucked
into an empathy hole.

Should I go back
to grad school?
Totally.

Leaving you to focus
on what really matters.

Man on TV: This next animal has
a lot going on down under.

I don't know if other
people struggle with

whether or not to have kids,
but I'm struggling.

I see you, I hear you,
I love you.

I want to hear more about
this grad school thing.

What's that saying?
Everyone wants a village,

but no one wants
to be a villager?

I was there for you
for three years.

News to me. All for...
Man: I don't know.

Just, like, maybe I should
go back to grad school.

Man #2: Maybe I should have
gone to grad school.

Man #3: Should I go
back to grad school?

- Grad school.
- Grad school.

My parents
offered to pay.

[ Doorbell rings ]

Jordoll?

I can't do it, man.
It's too sad.

Oh. I'm sorry.
Uh... come in.

♪

Jim asked me for notes
on his screenplay,

and George is mad because
John muted the group chat.

Like, none of these
are actual problems.

I'm drowning, man.

I'm sorry.
That sounds really hard.

Feeling burdened
by your Jordoll?

Introducing Jordoll Jr,

a friend for your
friend's friend.

I'm tired. I'm just,
I'm really, really tired.

Oh, man, that
sounds really hard.

If you ever need
someone to talk to...

I don't want to burden you,
man, but...

♪

Michael: I know
it's lame, but I, uh...

Yeah, I don't know,
it helps.

Therapist: I think that's
a really healthy way of coping.

I'm proud of you,
Michael.

Thanks.

Well, that's all we have
time for this week,

but I'm assuming
we're on for next week.

Oh, yep. Yeah.
Um...

I just wanted to say, too,
thanks so much for all of this.

I, um-- It really helps to get
this stuff out of my head.

That's why I'm here.

Any fun plans
for the weekend?

Oh, yeah.
Actually, after this,

I'm headed to Reed's
to get a drink with a friend.

I heard about that place.

That's, uh--
That's over on Belmont,

right near the new Wendy's
that went in, right?

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

I guess there is
a Wendy's over there.

Yep. That one.

Nice.
Well, have a good weekend.

You, too.

[ Thunder rumbling ]

[ Static crackling on TV ]

Man on TV: Wendy's hot
and juicy hamburgers

come in three sizes--
Wendy's single, 1/4 pound,

Wendy--

[ TV turns off ]

♪

[ Thunder crashes ]

It almost feels, like,
selfish or unethical

to feel sad when you--
when you have so much.

Like, I have everything
a person could possibly want.

Good family.
Good friends. Good job.

How is it
that I'm so sad?

You see, the thing is, for
thousands of years, thousands,

evolution didn't
prioritize joy.

But now you've arrived.

I mean, there's no more
sabertooth tiger waiting

to attack you around
the corner, you know?

Sadness is normal.
It's a part of life.

But you can give yourself
permission to feel joy.

Yeah.

I mean,
like, for example,

yesterday I was having
a rotten day.

Things were really
going in the toilet.

I stopped into Wendy's.

I got myself a Frosty,
and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Yeah, I just-- I never
let myself feel happy.

I know I need to be
nicer to myself,

but I look in the mirror,
and I hate what I see.

I think you need to cut
yourself some slack.

You know,
lie in this weekend.

Take it easy.
Binge watch a few shows.

Maybe, you know, order
yourself some Wendy's.

Just let yourself
off the hook.

[ Phone beeps ]

Uh, hey, Michael,
it's Dr. Thomas.

I just wanted to call you
about, uh, scheduling.

Man: Oh. Hello again.
How can I help you today?

Wait just a second. Sorry.

I'm one of my favorite
restaurants. Oh, hi.

I'll take a Baconator
and a baked potato

and a chocolate Frosty.
Thanks.

Well, thanks again
for moving our time.

I've got to head home
early today

for my grandson's birthday.
Oh, fun throwing a party?

Yeah.
As a matter of fact,

I'm responsible for
the food and entertainment

for a dozen
eight-year-old boys.

[ Chuckles ] Well,
good luck with that.

Actually, a lot of
people aren't aware,

but, um, Wendy's has
this fabulous

rewards program
that you can use,

and they make it super easy
because there's an app

for your phone--
you can order the whole thing.

Really, it's great.

I'm sorry, are you, like,

involved with
Wendy's somehow.

Am I involved
with Wendy's?

[ Chuckles ] Michael,
I'm a psychiatrist.

Your psychiatrist,
as you're well aware.

No, I-I know, I know,
it's just, like,

it feels like Wendy's
has come up a lot.

Michael, I-I know
you're a little anxious

about starting the medication.
Is that what this is about?

Mm-hmm.

You understand I'm not
one of those pill pushers.

But your avoidance
of medication feels to me

like it might be a form
of self-sabotage.

I mean, there are
millions of people

taking antidepressants
every day all over the world.

And if you find out that
it's not helpful to you,

you're free to stop.

So, go ahead,
fill that prescription.

Yeah. I'm sorry.

Yeah. You're right.

♪

[ Door slams, thunder crashes ]

All righty.
Sorry about that.

Thank you for
waiting, Michael.

Were you at my house
last week?

What do you mean?
What are you talking about?

Well, that's weird,

but I don't see what that
has to do with anything.

My prescription?
French fries?

What is it with you
and Wendy's?

Michael, I don't know where
this-- this Wendy's fixation

you have came from,

but you seem
extremely agitated to me.

Did you sleep okay?
Don't change the subject!

There's something
wrong with you!

You're weird!

I'm sorry.
I'm just confused.

You're right. I haven't
been sleeping very well.

And I'm just, like,
paranoid.
It's okay.

I just-- I got someone's
f*cking, like, dinner...

It's okay.
...for my prescription, and...

Just maybe have
a seat, you know?

♪

[ Gasps ] Aah!

[ Gasps ]

What is this?

What is this?
Where are we?!

Help! Help me!

Michael,
you're so unhappy.

You're still resisting
your medicine.

What the f*ck
is wrong with you?

You're insane!

I'm insane?

You have any idea
what it's like to sit

and listen to people
for nine hours a day,

complaining all about
the pain of their lives...

[ Speaking indistinctly ]

...when the answer is
right in front of them?

What are you
talking about?

Are you aware
there are 5,973

Wendy's locations
nationwide?

Man: Can I take your order?

There's an answer
on every corner.

Do people celebrate this?
No, not at all.

They take
this miracle cure,

and they refer
to it as junk food.

I'm going
to help you, Michael.

Okay.
It's time to open up.

No. No, please!

[ Screams ]

Just take one little bite.

Help me!

[ Muffled screaming ]

Take a bite.

There you go.

Now wash it down.

That's it.

There we are.

[ Breathing raggedly ]

You did a great job.

♪

Michael: I look in the mirror
and I hate what I see.

♪

Man on TV: Wendy's
hot and juicy hamburgers...

[ Sobbing ]

♪

♪

♪

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