Love in the Rough (1930)

[bunniefuu]

From nine to five we're buried alive,
we sweat and strive for Waters.

Come on now, let's do a lttle work
for a change.

Supposing the big boss dropped in.

Come on.

But he was... he was here already.

And boy, was he mad!
He was hotter than...

He was hot, I'm telling you.

Tell me... did he ask for me?

Asking for you, he asked for you with a
language what ain't in the dictionary.

And where did you tell him I was?

What's the difference,
you don't tell me anyway.

Didn't I tell you where to tell him
I had to go?

Sure, but then in the place he told me
to tell you where you could go.

Oh, yeah? Well, old sour pants
is getting too fresh lately.

You wait till I see that
wrinkle-faced old buzzard.

I'll tell him plenty.

I never liked him and I always will.

Somebody's got to tell him something
and it might as well be me.

Good.

In the mirror take a look,
take a look, take a look.

When that monkey comes
around here,

...I'll be have him eating coconuts
out of my hand.

Yes, of course, Mr. Waters is
a very fine gentleman.

What do you mean, very
fine gentleman?

He ought to be in a mouse trap.

Have you seen that mouse
around here anywhere?

It was here... I haven't been
able to, uh...

Oh, good morning, Mr. Waters.

Have you seen a little mouse running
around here anywhere?

- I, uh...
- You... disrespectful young guy!

Oh... you...

Twelve o'clock, everybody out
for lunching time.

- Twelve o'clock?
- My, my, how the morning has flown.

- Kelly!
- My goodness, do I get hungry!

I want to speak to you a minute,
and alone.

Thank you.

That settles it!

You're fired.

Oh, now, Mr. Waters, look, he didn't
break all of them, this one didn't break.

No... I only broke three of them,
and what's ten cents?

You could take it out
from my salary.

Get out and stay out!

Oh, Mr. Waters, have a heart.

- Mr. Waters, you'll be sorry for this.
- What!!

Get out!

Well, Mr. Waters, it's your own fault.

I know it. What?

Now you're fired!

- Who me?
- You, you heard me.

Say, what about my vacations?
Starts Monday, two weeks with pay.

Starts now, forever, without pay.

All right, if you're going to act
that way about it, I resign.

- You can't resign, you're fired!
- You can't fire me, I quit.

And I'm glad I'm going too!

You used to be a regular guy
to work for.

Lately you've been giving everybody
a pain in the, er... neck.

You haven't smiled in weeks.

You're turning out to be one
of the biggest crabs in town.

I can't help it.

I've got something on my mind.

Oh... oh, Mr. Waters,
what's the matter?

I'm worried sick.

If something doesn't happen pretty soon,
I don't know what I'll do.

Ha, stock market.

No, it isn't the stock market.

What's the matter, did your
wife leave you?

My wife didn't leave me,
it's worse than that.

What is it, it must be something serious.

It's my golf game.

Is that all?

Is that all? It's got me worried to death,
it's ruined my disposition,

my health, my business,
my family, my...

I'm on the verge of going
to the hospital.

Listen. Every ball I hit,
I cut and slice...

It starts down the middle of the fairway
like a b*llet out of a g*n...

and then suddenly for no reason at all...

...the dodgasted thing turns around
and goes out in the woods.

Cheer up, Mr. Walter,
it's all in your mind.

Mind, what has mind got
to do with golf...

...when it takes sixteen strokes
to get out of a sand trap?

What's the use of talking
to you about it?

You don't understand.

Oh, I don't, don't I?

I play a little golf myself.

- You do.
- Sure.

Take a peek at that.

Oh!

Municipal championship.

1929... Kelly...

Well, I'll be...

You... are Kelly?

Uh... champion...?

Well...

I... er, listen, Kelly.

Our club has got a tournament.

I want you to get me back
in my game.

- You can coach me every day...
- Uh-uh, I'm sorry, Mr. Walters.

I've just been fired.

- Who fired you?
- You did.

Oh... oh, Kelly, can't you take a joke?

Why, Kelly...

I'm ashamed of you.

- And Benny isn't fired either, is he?
- Benny? Why, no!

Fired! Why, I love Benny.
I... excuse me. Listen.

I will arrange right away for a two-weeks'
card for you to play golf at my club.

And you can get me back
on my game, and I'll win that cup.

Well, Mr. Waters, seeing it's you,
I'll accept your proposition,

I think I can fix you up in two...
On the other hand, it might take three.

- Weeks?
- Months... er, weeks, yeah.

That's fine, Kelly...
That's... that's wonderful.

I'll drive over right now
and make the...

Oh, yes...

Er, Kelly,

You know, um, this club of mine
is very exclusive and...

...it isn't necessary for you to tell the
members that you're my shipping clerk.

You, um... are supposed to be
a friend of mine.

- You understand?
- Yeah, I'm way ahead of you.

That's fine. I must leave.

Um... now, Kelly...

I don't want to make a mistake, listen.

You really think that I have
a chance to win this Cup?

Listen, with me coaching you,
nothing can stop you.

- That's all right, I quit.
- No, no!

You don't have to quit.
It's all right!

I was going to break it anyhow.
It's all right.

See you at the club.

Hello. Hello, give me the cashier's office.

Yeah.

Then Benny didn't get fired, huh?

- He loves you... pal.
- Pals it is.

Hello, cashier's office?
This is Jack Kelly speaking.

Yeah, Mr. Jack Kelly.
I'm going on a little trip.

I'd like to have some money.
Yeah.

What do you mean I'm overdrawn?

Oh, yeah? Well, I'll speak to my pal
Mr. Waters about that.

Hey, what kind of trip you going on?

Listen, boy, what a break. I get a two weeks'
card for the Oakmont Country Club.

Oh, then you ain't going fishing
and hunting with me on lake...

...Nappassakihepimakipekitequiheki?

No, but there may be some way
to smuggle you in here.

I got it. Make it a one week's
card for two.

Say, this takes money,
what's the matter,

were you dropped on your head
when you were a baby?

Takes money? Don't be so sarcratic.

You're talking to a people showing you in a
second what you never seen in your whole time.

Look on that!
Savings from my lifetime.

- How much?
- I million... a thousand... $84.

- Say, I know how we could get you in.
- How?

- You can go as my valet.
- Oh, I'll be anything.

- I'll be your bootlegger!
- Ah-ah-ah-ah...

Now remember, we're mixing
with the cream of society.

Feh... the cream of today is
the cheese of tomorrow.

Hello!

Look, the orchestra came down
to meeting us.

- Shut up, you sap, they're bellboys.
- Bellboys...? Oh, they work here.

Take all them bags, and quickly
and swiftly, you hear that?

Hey, be careful how you're
carrying that.

In one of them briefs is our
bottle of hair tonic.

Here you are.

- Here. And I'll keep the change.
- And don't forget the bellhops.

I forgot them already.

You cheapskate!

Oh, boy, ain't it beautiful here?

I wonder if they're charging you
for looking at the lake.

I want to tell you something before
you go into this club.

- Yeah?
- You've gotta learn to tip,

you've gotta learn to give
not less than 50c...

...and you've got to learn
to give it with a smile.

I'll give a nickel and cry.

Er, Benjamin, you take care
of the boys.

Oh, Mr. Kelly, come look
at the mountaintops...

...surrounding the lakes down below
and above.

And the little birdies singing
cheep-cheep, cheep-cheep.

Benjamin, did you hear what
I told you?

And the beautiful atmosphere and the climate
which is coming in through the window.

Oh, gorgy. And after all, ain't
the best things in life... free?

Yes, very beautiful, very beautiful.

Will you quit stalling and give
them a tip?

Yes, Mr. Kelly, your bath. Why, of course,
how could I forget your bath?

And, oh...

Excuse me, boys, I was kind
of lost in the clouds.

You see, the atmosphere's kind
of different around there.

See, I'm new in this town.

- Thanks.
- That's all right, enjoin yourself.

How do you do?

Boy!

I forgot my ukelele. Would you go
to my room and get it for me?

I'll be on the terrace.

Wh-wh-who was that girl?

That's Marilyn Crawford, daughter
of Crawford the wheat king.

- Does she, er, live here at the club?
- Sometimes, sir.

- She comes down here to play golf.
- To play golf... Oh, golf!

Golf, huh, golf, huh?

Thank you, thank you very much.

Thank you very much for
that information.

Benjamin... Mr. Benjamin, reward the youth
for his information with a handful of money.

- Here's 50c, give me a quarter change.
- What?

Keep it, it's alright.

Say, might be you could find out
if she's got a sister.

Yes, sir.

You know Miss Wheat King.

The golf champion craves entertainment.
So play me a few of those chords, Marilyn.

I crave entertainment myself.
Let's make Paul and the boys play, shall we?

- All right.
- If it isn't one thing, it's another.

All right.

All right, fellows, let's go.

# When you feel a buzz #
# Inside your head #

# When the cuckoo sings #
# Beside your bed #

# When you see in red #
# You're going to fall in love #

# When you start to write #
# A lot of grace #

# Some of it is bad #
# And some is waste #

# If your life's accursed #
# you're what they call in love #

# This much is worth confiding #
- # Your heart I've got to win #

# Baby, I feel I'm sliding #
# Here's where your girl gives in #

# I'm doing that thing #
# Getting that swing, falling in love #

# I'm falling #

# I'm taking that leap #
# Losing my sleep #

# Living on love #
# I'm living on love #

# Every time I dream I need a kiss #

# Oh, I need a kiss #

# Might as well be crazy #
# Than be like this #

# I might as well be crazy #

# I'm starting to rave #
# Raving to start following through #

# I'm raving #

# I'm saving to try, trying to save #
# Making you blue #

# I never will be blue #

# Tell your own heart #
# Just what I'm thinking of #

# Oh, oh, oh #
# I'm doing that thing #

# Falling in love #

# I'm doing that thing #
# Getting that swing, falling in love #

# I'm taking that leap #
# Losing my sleep, living on love #

# Every time I dream I need a kiss #

# Oh, baby, might as well be crazy #
# Than be like this #

# I'm starting to rave #
# Raving to start following through #

# I'm saving to try, trying to save #
# Making you blue #

# Tell your own heart #
# Just what I'm thinking of #

# I'm doing that thing #
# Falling in love #

# I'm doing that thing #
# Getting that swing, falling in love #

# I'm taking that leap #
# Losing my sleep, living on love #

# Every time I dream I need a kiss #

# Might as well be crazy #
# Than feel like this #

# Might as well be crazy #

# I'm starting to rave #
# Raving to start following through #

# I'm saving to try, trying to save #
# Making you blue #

# Tell your own heart #
# Just what I'm thinking of #

# I'm doing that thing #
# Falling in love #

# I'm starting to rave #
# Raving to start following through #

# I'm saving to try, trying to save #
# Making you blue #

# Tell your own hearts #
# Just what I'm thinking of #

# I'm doing that thing #
# Falling in love #

- I'm going to sh**t a 71 today.
- All right.

Which line, old boy, the red one?

# Getting that swing, falling in love #

Hey, Benny, hurry up, will you?
I want to get out and play.

I'm ready.

Say, what are you made up for,
a masquerade?

What's the matter?

Come on, come on, will you pull up
those pants?

They won't stay, my knees
is too skinny, see?

Oh, pull them up above
your knees.

Oh.

# I'm doing that thing #
# Getting that swing, falling in love #

- Bring that bag, will you?
- Bag, yeah...

Which suitcase you want?

What's the matter with you?

Say listen, do you want to get us
thrown out of here?

But haven't said anything to anyone.

Now, w-w-w-will you tighten those
straps below your knees!

Oh, I don't know...
Why don't you give me a lesson then?

All you've got to do is follow me.

What's the first thing I have
to learn in playing golf?

Keep your head down.

- You play with your head?
- Certainly.

Upside down?

Oh, come on, will you,
the greens are calling.

Who?

The gr... Don't you know what
the greens are?

Oh, sure, onions, lettuce, spinach...

Now, don't laugh!

- You've never played golf before, have you?
- No.

Well, I think I'll give you your
first lesson right now.

Um, you see that bag?

- Yeah.
- Well,

All you've got to do is to learn to keep
that bag on your shoulder.

- Oh, that's all?
- Sure.

Oh!

Hey, Kelly.

The way it commences I don't think
I'm going to like this game.

# I'm doing that thing #
# Getting that swing, falling in love #

# I'm losing my sleep... #

Already I'm getting tired
from carrying this bag.

Four, please.

Oooh!

Four, for the last time.

What is this, an auction?

Ouch! There goes that blister!

Harry, have you a piece of tape?

No, I haven't.

Have you, Sidney?

Hey, excuse me, I have some tape.

- Oh, but I'd hate to trouble you.
- Oh, that's no trouble at all.

May... may I examine the little blister?

Oh, gee.

You know, the trouble is that you hold
your club too tight.

- Oh, really?
- Yeah.

Now, you wait a minute,
this'll fix it up.

Come on, Marilyn, you're holding
up the game.

You know, you have to hold this
and press it down so it'll stick.

I had one on my hand once and I had
to hold it there for an hour.

- Oh, yes?
- Yeah.

Well!

Oh, that's much better.

Thank you so much.

- You're very kind.
- Not at all.

You're very welcome.

- Excuse me, Benny.
- That's alright.

I'm sympathising with that girl
with the blue streak.

- Once I had one here...
- Four, four...

- No, only one, I'll show you.
- Four means quiet.

Pretty good.

Perfect, I'd say.

Yes, it's alright with me too.

Thanks again for the tape.

Thank you for the blister.

Hey, hey, hey, where are you going?

Going with them,
ain't you going to play?

You come back here,
I want the driver.

The driver? What does he
charge an hour.

Ah, stupid!

This is the driver.

I am stupid. I thought you was
calling for a taxi.

Say, listen, you get over there now.

And don't move, don't even breathe!

Now listen, Kelly, no wisecrams,
this is serious.

Oh, go crawl in the bag!

I won't crawl in the bag!

Say, don't you know if you'd
been hit by that club,

you wouldn't have come through
for a week?

A week's nothing. You can bring
me through in a second.

- Just fan me with a herring.
- All right, all right, Benny, I'm sorry.

- Now, go get the bag and we'll play.
- Oh, good, alright!

Four! Four hundred!
Four thousand!

As many as you can count!

All right, Benny, come on.

No!

Why not?

Because you hit me in the stomach
when my back was turned.

All right, if you won't come,
I'll go and play alone.

No, you won't!

It is no laughing matter!
I quit!

Life's too short.

Come on, Sidney, don't give up!

I tell you, I'm through!

Sidney, you made a hole in one.

I don't see anything to laugh at!

Hey, come on back!
You're breaking up the game.

Oh, let him go, he has no
golf temperament.

Oh, all right.

Hey, what's the big idea?

Hey, what's the idea of
driving into us?

- My ball couldn't have gone that far.
- No?

- There it is on the green.
- What?

Yeah.

Oh, I'm terribly sorry, old man.

Well, the first thing you should learn...

...is not to approach a green
when there's other players on it.

I'm sorry, I apologize.

I apologize to everybody.

It's quite all right, no harm done.

You see, the card said that it was
525 yards.

And I never expected to get
on the green in two.

On in two?

- Was that your second shot?
- I'm afraid it was.

Oh, my!

Say, you're not Bobby Jones,
are you?

No, I wish I were.

Well, you're my partner for
the rest of this match.

Oh, um... may I present Miss Crawford.

And Mr. Johnson.

- How do you do?
- Hello.

And your little partner's name is Wilson.

My name's Kelly.

- My name's Lebitowitz.
- My name's Rappaport, C. Wesley Rappaport.

(in Russian dialect)

These are the people that
I am working for.

Oh.

Excuse me.

- You will play with us, won't you?
- Try to stop me.

Fine!

- This is yours. You're away.
- Thanks.

Say, I forgot to ask you, from what city
in Russia do you coming?

From Minsk. I've been in this country
three years already.

- You speak beautiful...
- Four!

Nice shot.

Congratulations!
That's my partner.

Say, Kelly, meet a friend of mine,
Mr. Rappaport from Minsk.

- How do you do?
- Hello, hello. Minsk, yes...

- Would you mind giving me the club, Benny?
- Enjoin yourself.

Thank you very much. Now, will you
wait for me right over there?

Yes.
I'm seeing you again some time.

- Thank you.
- Keep it.

- Wow.
- Nice shot.

I say, swell, old man.

I'm sorry about spoiling that
putt of yours before.

- Is this your flivver?
- No, that's my automobile.

Hm, refuse me.

Well, I tell you what I was thinking.
I would like to renting that,

putting in the clubs,
and to driving around,

and I will bring it back to you.

Oh, well, excuse me, please,
you must remember,

you the guest of the hotel that's alright,
but that's my bread and butter...

...and it's my business.

But I'll pay, I'll pay, I'll pay.

How much?

Well, uh...

- Here's 25c, boy.
- Twenty-five cents?

- Sure.
- For the kids from the hotel 25c.

Why, you don't think I would...
Say, 50c, alright?

Well, alright, I'm giving you 50c.

- Alright.
- I'll be back in a second.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, I don't like
the way you jump in the car.

Oh, I jump lightly.

Oh, well, please don't forget, I want you
to take care of the automobile, see?

- Yes.
- I don't want you to hurt the car.

- Oh, no.
- Because if you break the car,

- Yes?
- I break your neck!

I think you broke it already.

And don't forget! Bring him back!

I wouldn't forget.
I give you my word.

Alright.

Hey, Kelly!

Oh, povero me.

Four.

Ma per ch? ai avuto locare
il autocarro tuo al asino, hm?

Per ch? ai avuto locare
il autocarro?

Come on, Marilyn.
Coming?

Well, here we are on the practice tee.

Where you take your first lesson
for better or for worse.

Hey, where's the hero?

Oh, he'll be here.

Say, wouldn't it be awful
if he didn't show up?

Feel like a bird this morning.

I'll knock them a mile today.

I should say two miles.

Look out there, isn't that beautiful? I can
hardly wait to get a noseful of that air.

Smells an awful lot like
rain to me.

It's the... Rain nothing! Look out there,
did you ever see anything as beautiful?

I never saw anything more
beautiful in all my life.

Come on, Kelly, let's go.

- What's the matter?
- Oooh, I tripped over that bench.

- I must have sprained my ankle.
- Sprained your ankle?

- Yeah.
- Can I do anything for it?

- Oooh!
- Oh, excuse me, why, what...

- I'll be all right...
- That's fine.

- By this afternoon.
- You know...

- By this afternoon?
- Yeah.

By this afternoon.

Hello, Dave!

You're just the boy I've been
looking for.

Yeah?

I'll just take you on for a dollar
a hole this morning.

- Oh, you will, eh?
- You're the one man in this club...

...that I can beat any time
for any amount.

Now don't be funny.

How many strokes will you give me?

Two strokes and I'll bet you $5.

Mr. Water's driving is a bit off
this week, sir.

Well, I'll give him five strokes
and bet him ten then.

Oh, you think my playing is
as bad as that, do you?

I think Mr. Waters should have
at least ten strokes from you, sir.

Ten strokes?

All right, I'll give the old woman
ten strokes and bet him $20.

Well, that's a lot of money,
but I think you can do it.

Oh, you do.

I'll take that back and I'll
make it fifty.

- It's a bet.
- Right!

Oh, Kelly, I'm sorry to
disappoint you,

but you can find something to do around
here for a couple of hours, can't you?

It'll be hard, but I'll try.

Good.
Old woman, eh?

I just came to wish you
lots of luck, sir.

Thank you.

No, no. Now, I tell you, he holds
his hands this way.

No, he doesn't, Virgie, I watched
how he held his hands.

This way.

Oh, yes? And did you watch
how he held your hand?

Oh, don't be silly!

Morning.

- Oh, good morning, Mr. Kelly.
- I suppose you're all warmed up.

Let me see you swing once.

All right.

- Um, pardon me.
- Sure.

- Let me correct just one little fault.
- Of course.

- Wesley.
- Yes?

Come here.

- See that girl there?
- Yes.

I'm coconuts for that girl.

Hey, look, when I'm talking to her, would you
play on that something senstipental?

- Perverse, niet?
- Yes.

But wait. Say, boys.

Don't call no fellows, I get ashamed.

These boys are playing good music,
that's my Lord Chester.

Listen, play number 2 from
number 3 book, sweet.

Sweet.
- Yes, sweet.

If you'll stand a little nearer me,

# You'll surely see there's bound to be #
# A big improvement #

# Each little movement #
# Will make a difference in your game #

# Pay attention to a new technique #

# And when I speak just turn your cheek #
# In my direction #

# I love this new correction #
# With you I'm finding perfection #

# You're teaching my arms #
# To wonderful things to do #

# It's true, believe it or not #
# I'm learning a lot from you #

# Training my mails to say #
# What you want them to #

# I'm telling you what #
# I'm learning a lot from you #

# Now that I know you #
# I've got my education #

# I'll never throw you #
# Back into circulation #

# Teaching me things is... #
What?

# ...golf that I never knew #

# Than you #
# Believe it or not #

# I'm learning a lot from you #

If you'll stand a little nearer me,

you're gonna see it's bound
to be a big deprovement.

Each little movemink will make
a difference to your game.

# Pay attention to a new technique #

# And when I speak turn your cheek #
# In my direction #

# I love this new correction #
# With you I'm finding perfection #

# Say, who would have thought
# That faces like your face woo #

# They do, believe it or not #
# I'm learning a lot from you #

# Oh what a prize to capture #
# Someone like you #

# To buy what beautiful girls... #
# I'm learning a lot from you #

# Your ways are lovely... #
Kelly, oh, Kelly...

# Well, sis, I admit to you #
# I'm full of goose-pimples myself #

Oh, if I had the nerve, I would dig,
I would kiss, I would put my arms...

- Do you know what I would do?
- What?!

# I'm learning to much from you #

I was crazy for the lesson.

- Virgie, get your clubs and play with us.
- Sure!

No, I think I'd better go over
to Linn Hayden and play with Harry.

We'll be over there all day.

Well, mes amours.

Oh, you'd better come along.

You'll be sorry.

Uh-uh. I don't dare trust myself
with this Siberian sheik.

Wrong again, is Brooklyn.

Say, don't you want to come along
and carry out bags?

No, I got a blister on each foot.

- He's afraid of the gardener.
- Who's afraid?

Say, if he comes round here and tries
to make trouble with me,

why, I'll give him a punch in...

Now, Benny, you wouldn't hit the
poor gardener, would you?

All right.

I don't care!

He ought to be kicked by a jackass
and I'd like to be the one to do it.

Kelly, I'm coming.

Christoforo Columbus on high!

I can't find no ball.

Maybe it's in there.

No, it ain't in there.

Well, Kelly, you got to quit,
all the ba*ls is lost now.

No more ba*ls, we go home, huh?

What do you mean all the ba*ls
is lost now?

Didn't you just pick a ball
up from there?

No, I did not!

And besides, look at the clouds,
it's gonna rain.

It's coming to...

Come on, pick them up!

Pick them up.

Oh, I have to do everything,
you don't do anything.

Just walk around, and me...

Gee.

You'd better use the mashie.

Do you know, that's the best work
I've ever done with a spoon.

You should see me with a knife
and some peas.

Oh, oh... bad luck!

It might stop raining.

Gee, that shower certainly
came up suddenly, didn't it?

Certainly did. We didn't even notice
it was on its way, did we?

I haven't noticed anything
all morning except...

Me too.

Oh... my, my hands are cold.

Come to doctor.

It isn't so bad now, is it?

Getting better every minute.

Rain's a funny thing, isn't it?

Sometimes it comes just at
the right time to make...

- ...great friends.
- I'll say it does.

# Our hands and eyes have met #
# Our lips are friendly too #

# Don't you think that you #

# Should go and warn the family #

# You owe your folks a debt #
# Of confidence it's true #

# And mother knows what's best #
# So get this off your chest #

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That she certainly did #
# A wonderful job on you #

# Go home and tell your father #

# That we're marrying #
# Like respectable people do #

# Then ask her what she did #
# Ask Father what he did #

# When both of them needed #
# A darned site more than kisses #

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That her beautiful child #
# Is gonna belong to me #

# When you blew in my life #
# Like some refreshing breeze #

# I'll admit my knees #
# Were really very shaky #

# Now I begin my life #
# And love you as I please #

# You told me what to do #
# You'll have to marry too #

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That she certainly did #
# A wonderful job on you #

# Go home and tell your father #

# That we're marrying #
# Like respectable people do #

# Tell Mother that I love #
# Tell Father that you love #

# That only a few love #
# Exaclty like we two love #

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That her wonderful boy #

# Is going to belong to me #

Oh, boy, it's grand to be inside safe.

Outside it's raining cats with dogs
and all different kinds of things.

- What's the matter with you?
- Keep that match away from that gasoline.

Well, can't you clean your
shoes another time?

I won't have time later.
Calcutta's tonight.

And don't forget you're going to be
my caddie in the tournament tomorrow.

- Not me!
- Oh, yes you are.

Oh... I'm feeling faintly.

I'm sick.

Oh, everything is turning
brown in front of me.

Oh, Kelly...

Where's the bed?

Where's the bed... I got it.

Oh... I'm unconscious.

- Here you are.
- What is it?

- Castor oil.
- No!

No, I don't need it.

- Kelly...
- One spoon full of this and...

...you'll be on your feet in no time.

From now on you take it for me!

Now it's in my throat and
I can't swallow...

Maybe you got a touch of tonsilitis.

I'd better take a look.

No...

Open your mouth.

Come on, open up now, wide!

Let me look!

Hot candle grease.

- Oh, I'm sorry.
- But I'm sick.

Kelly, listen.

I'm going to play Brown again in the morning
on the seventh flight of the big tournament.

I wanna play him even.

- Even?
- Even, why not?

I'm playing for the big Cup.

Listen, I want you with me
to slip me some tips.

- You're going to be my caddie.
- Oh, gee, that's tough.

You see, the committee were
sending me off...

...in a championship flight
tomorrow morning.

They... they would spoil my chances.

Oh, you don't need me to beat him.

Why, you did it today.

You can do it again tomorrow.

It's all right...

You know, Kelly, that's just
what I needed.

- A little... confidence.
- Sure!

And say, listen, if you want
to take a caddie along...

...who'll be a mental hazard for Brown,

take Benny.

Kelly, you're a genius.
That's an inspiration.

You know, that one thought was worth
the whole price of your trip.

- Benny, wake up!
- Eh?

You're going to carry my
bag tomorrow.

Who is going to carry me?

- I will.
- Oh, now...

I'll get him down there in the
morning dead or alive.

You will? I depend on you, Kelly, because
I know you wouldn't tell me a lie.

Has anybody around you here yet
asked you what business you were in?

Oh, no. No, I wouldn't embarass you,
Mr. Waters.

I wouldn't let anybody around here
know I was working for you.

Well, regardless of that,

If anybody does ask you, just tell them
that you're in the shipping business.

- Get me?
- Sure!

I wonder what he wants now.

- Mr. Kelly?
- Yeah.

I'm Dr. O'Farrell.

I just passed Mr. Waters in the hall...

...and he asked me to come up
and look at your throat.

Oh, no, you got the wrong throat.
It's Benny's thoat, he's up there.

He's got tonsilitis or something,
I don't know.

Well, pardon me, I'll see.

Benny, this is the doctor. We want to find
out whether you're really sick or not.

- Is that so.
- How do you feel?

Terrible!

Would you mind opening
your mouth, please?

Oh, come on, Benny, open up!

That's it, that's it, hold it!

Well, the tongue looks
perfectly healthy to me.

- Looks that way to me too.
- Hey, doctor, I am begging you pardon!

My tongue is unhealthy.
Am I sick or you're sick?

Wait a minute, wait a minute,
wait a minute.

After all this man's a doctor,
he ought to know his business.

Oh, um... I didn't happen to bring
anything with me, Mr. Kelly,

- Have you a spoon handy?
- A spoon... a sp... oh, sure, excuse me.

Oh, thank you.

- Open your mouth.
- What for?

I want to push your tongue down
to get a good look at your tonsils.

Oh, well, that's all, enjoin yourself.
Go ahead.

Oh, I'm dying, I'm dying!

Give me a glass of water! In such a big place
there ain't a glass of water!

Water... right here...

Now I die, doctor, now I'm dying!
I'm dying good!

Doctor, is your chance!
Doctor, come get me!

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That she certainly did #
# A wonderful job of you #

# Go home and tell your father #

# That we're marrying #
# Like respectable people do #

You must think an awful lot of Kelly.

What do you mean?

Well, you paid $3,000 for
his Calcutta ticket...

...to beat me in the tournament
tomorrow.

But I think he'll win. That's why
I bought his ticket.

I don't.

- Oh, did you hear?
- What?

Mr. Kelly is the general manager
of a large shipping company.

- No!
- Yes.

How perfectly marvelous.

Oh, am I the little newsie.
Where is Marilyn?

- Oh, Marilyn.
- Yes?

I just heard Mr. Kelly is vice-president
of an international shipping corporation.

- What?
- Oh, he is, is he? My, that's fine!

That was wonderful of Marilyn,
wasn't it?

- What?
- Oh, I think it was great.

Why, to take a $3,000 ticket
in the Calcutta auction on you!

Oh, yes.

Oh, pardon me.

Can I have the next dance
with the life of the party?

- Thank you!
- Thanks.

Can I have one with you?

- Hello.
- Hello!

Oh, um, excuse me, please.

- Why, Mr. Kelly!
- Hello, Sidney.

I must congratulate you on that
remarkable round you made.

Sixty-eight, was it not?

- Oh, Johnson.
- Yeah?

Just a minute.

You had some pretty stiff competition
in that auction, didn't you?

Yeah, after a fashion.

Seems as women nowadays don't care how
fast they spend their money, do they?

You're right.

It's ridiculous the fuss they make over
a man as soon as they find out he's rich.

- Who's rich?
- Your guest Kelly.

Huh?

Yes, I understand he's president of the
International Shipping Corporation.

- Is that right?
- Uh... who, Kelly?

Oh, yes, yes, he's the International...

Er, the president... we had to put
him up, you know.

He began at the bottom...
he's a very, very efficient...

He's really into the...
Oh, yes, Kelly's a...

...very, very rich man.

I didn't know at first who
you were talking about.

- What's the matter, you sick?
- Yes... oh, no, thank you.

I'm sorry.

Well, that's... very nice of you.

Well, uh... Hey, boy!

Come here, will you?

Yes, sir?

You, um, go in and tell Mr. Kelly that
I want to talk to him immediately.

- Yes, sir.
- That's a nice boy.

Blockhead.

So he's in International.

Shipping.

Around here eating good food
and flirting with aristocrats...

that he never saw before,
he's gotta...

And I waste my time and money bringing him
up here to teach me how to hold a caddie.

Or shipping... I'll...

I won't put up with this.

Pardon me, Mr. Kelly,
Mr. Waters wants to see you.

Wants to see...

Excuse me.

Now, young man.

I think I warned you against doing anything
around this club that would embarrass me.

- Why, what's the matter, Mr. Waters?
- The matter?

I told you to say you were
in the shipping business, yes.

But I didn't tell you to say that you owned
all the oceans and ships in the world.

Oh, I didn't tell anybody that.

Well, somebody said so.

I'm responsible for you
around here.

Old man Crawford is my friend.

And I won't stand for
any fortune-hunting.

What?

Oh, come on now, that's out.

I'm not after his money.

Well... even if you're not,

why should you let a girl like that
fall in love with you?

An ordinary shipping clerk.

Maybe you're right.

Perhaps I'd better go
tell her who I am.

I think so.
Oh, wait a minute.

Now listen, don't be impulsive
about this.

Think of my reputation around here.

You'll not tell anybody
anything about this.

You'll get out of here tonight.
This minute.

- I'll get out after the tournament.
- You'll go now!

And leave her holding that $3,000
ticket on me?

All right, do I go or do I stay?

All right.

But you go right after
the tournament.

Have I got your word on that?

- All right.
- All right.

You know, Kelly, I liked you
from the first.

You seem like a son of mine.

- Excuse me, will you?
- Of course, Marilyn.

Oh, here you are.

I want to congratulate you, Jack.
I hear you've just been made president...

of the International Shipping
Corporation.

Um... Marilyn I want to tell you
about that, I want to explain it...

Never mind. I know men like you prefer
to be modest about your success.

Yes, but Marilyn, I...

Marilyn, I'm leaving here Saturday.

You mean I won't see you
after Saturday?

Well, I guess that's the way
it'll have to be.

Why?

Well... I think things will work
out better that way.

Oh.

This is our dance, isn't it?

Maybe our last together.

# One more waltz #

# Here in my arms #
# Close to my heart #

# One more dream #

# For me to hold #
# When we're apart #

# One kiss to bind #
# Your lips to mine, love #

# One word to make #
# This night divine, forever #

# So spare me this longing #

# A kiss #
# Another waltz with you #

Marilyn, I can't give you up.

It isn't wrong, it can't be wrong
when I love you so.

Why can't we just ditch everybody
and run away and be married now?

- Tonight?
- Yes, tonight.

Oh, don't let me say no, Jack.

- It fell somewhere around here...
- Yes.

I don't see it...
Funny, it's gone.

Oh, I must have lost it some place else.

- Third floor.
- Uh... wait here for us, will you, please?

- Hurry up, now.
- Yes, Jack.

I won't be a moment.

All right.

Hey! Hello, kid!

What's this?

Say, what's the matter?

Are we thrown out or something?

Are you demb and duff, what's the matter?

The best friend I got in the world
is going to be married tonight.

If he's a friend of yours,
stop him, k*ll him, stop him.

You don't know anything about love.

I don't know about love, ha!

You should know how many women
think that I am, uh...

...half Spanish.

You're sicker than I thought
you were.

Sick or no sick, don't you ever
fall for no dame.

No, why?

You give any woman enough rope
and she'll skip.

Listen you silly-looking dunce.
Love... love is the greatest thing in life.

- Kelly.
- What?

Kiss me.

What the...

Well, mazeltov to the groom
and the bride.

Now folks, you see, you see...

th-this is our, our, our wed...
our wedding, our, our, our...

our bridal s-s-s-s...
our, our honeymoon room.

And you'll find the bath
d-d-d-down... outside.

I think we'd better find
another hotel.

I don't think you're going
to be comfortable here.

Oh, we'll make the best of it, dear.

We can go to the Biltmore tomorrow.

- Yeah... Bilt...?
- Hm-hmm.

- Yeah.
- Oh, I forgot!

I must send Dad a wire.

Could you send a telegram for me?

Oh, yes, ma'am, b-b-b-but, but see,

It'll have to be t-t-t-took
down to the railroad s-s-s-s-s-s...

station, but I, but I, but I...
can arrange that...

because, you see, I'm the t-t-t-telegraph
op-op-op, the teleg...

the, the man.

Thank you.

Pretty... p-p-pretty p-p-painting, isn't it?

I'd like to send a straight
message, please.

Yes, ma'am.

- Joseph-Joseph P. P. C-C-Cr...
- Crawford.

That's what I s-s-s-s-said.

Uh, Da-Dad d-d-d-darling,
I'm married to the ni-ni-ni...

to the swe-swe-sweet...
Pardon me.

I'm married to the finest boy
in the world. His name's... Kelly.

No more s-s-s-scolding me about
m-m-m-money...

because he's president of the big
sh-sh-sh-ship...

Marilyn, darling, I wouldn't say
that if I were you.

Please don't be so modest, darling.

...sh-sh-shipping corporation.

We are t-t-t-terribly happy.

Love, Marilyn.

Is there anything more that I can
d-do, d-do, d-do-do...

...do for you?

- No, thank you. You can g-g-g...
- Go?

Yeah.

Why so serious?

Dad's going to forgive us, I know.

Marilyn, darling, listen.

About my being in the shipping
business, I...

Dad just loves people in the
shipping business.

Look at this beautiful bay out here.

And the moonlight on the water.

Turn out the lights.

Jack, come here.

We're right on the rock.

Yes.

Wonderful, isn't it?

Yeah.

Jack, promise me one thing.

What, dear?

If dad wants you to buy that big estate
next to his, don't you buy it, will you?

Don't worry. I won't.

You know, I'm not going to have
you spending $300,000 on me.

That's... that's very sweet
of you, dear.

Jack, I want you to know
one thing.

I didn't marry you for your money.

I know it.

We'll buy a nice, cheap little place,
about $50,000...

Huh?

Why, of course. That will be nice
enough for us, won't it?

Yes, oh, yes...
Yes, sure.

Ouch, oh... I stepped
on something...

Oh... shall I... shall I turn
on the lights?

No! No... not yet.

All right, now you can turn
on the lights.

Marilyn, there's something
I've got to tell you.

And you've got to listen to me.

Why, what do you mean, Jack?

Well...

I'm not the president of
a shipping corporation.

I'm just a clerk in Water's
Department Store.

A shipping clerk.

Twenty-five dollars a week.

- I'm... I'm nothing.
- Jack.

Oh, I know what you're thinking.

You think I married you
for your money.

But that's not true.

I've tried to tell you this before.

But when I realized it might
mean losing you,

I weakened every time.

I'm telling you this now
because I love you.

Oh, I don't blame you.

I'll go away and... you'll never
have to see me again.

You can have our marriage annulled.

And no one needn't know
anything about it.

But remember... I love you.

And I always will.

You're on now, Mr. Johnson.

Mr. Harry Johnson, our own
Oakmont Club champion,

...and three-times winner of
this championship.

Mr. Jack Kelly, last year
Municipal Champion...

and three days ago broke our
course record with a sixty-eight.

Say, I wonder what's the
matter with Kelly.

He'll never win driving like that.

Come in.

Dad!

My, but I'm glad you've come.

What's the matter?

Sit down there, young lady.

- There?
- Yes!

Now, who's this little pipsqueak
you've married?

He's not a pipsqueak.

So what is he then?

He's the finest, most wonderful
boy in the world.

I know you'll just love him.

What do you mean by wiring me that he's
the president of a shipping corporation?

I've inquired of twenty and not one
of them had even heard of him.

Well, probably he's never heard
of them either.

We'll dispense with the comedy,
young lady.

I want to know what he does.

Who is he?

He's a perfectly respectable
and honorable shipping clerk.

And a good one too.

- A shipping clerk?
- Yes!

The young scoundrel's after my money.

That's his game.

No, he's not!

That's what I was foolish
enough to think too.

I'll never forgive myself.

He means more to me than
anything in the world.

Where is he?

He's out there playing Johnson
for the championship.

What?

He's playing who?

Jack's playing Johnson for
the championship.

They've just left the fifteenth hole.
And Jack's two down.

Playing for the championship
only two down to Johnson?

Yes.

Why didn't you tell me
he was a golfer?

And what kind of a golfer!

Oh, he's the greatest golfer
you ever saw.

And you in here mooning, and he's out
there needing your encouragement.

What kind of a wife are you?

Oh, Dad!

Johnson can't trim any
son of mine...

...for any amount they wanna bet.

- Now let's see Jack?
- Come on, come on!

We'd best hurry before they
get to the fifteenth hole.

I say, if Kelly doesn't win the next
three holes, he'll lose the match.

- Yes, I know he will.
- Oh, what do you mean?

So, that's your tutor, eh?
Champion Kelly.

Oh, try to think of something else.

Mr. Kelly, my name's Crawford.

How do you do?

I'm your father-in-law.

Huh? Oh... I'm glad to know you.

Did Marilyn come with you?

No, she didn't want to unnerve
you, my boy.

She's waiting for you over
at the clubhouse.

- At the clubhouse, thanks.
- Yeah.

Hooray!

Johnson's on the green in three.

Yeah, well when Kelly makes his drive,
he'll be on the green in two.

- Four!
- No, two!

Yes, two!

He's in the worse trap of the course.

You might as well pay me
the money now.

- It's not over yet!
- Nothing's over till it's over!

- Yeah, put that in your pipe and smoke it.
- And I hope your match goes out!

- What's that?
- Nothing.

Here it is, sir, in the trap.

Brown, get off my feet.

The nineteen.

- Do you think he'll make it?
- Shh!

All right now, people, silence!

The match on 18th green is all even.

Mr. Johnson lying three,
Mr. Kelly lying three.

Take it off, please.

Quiet!

The biginning from a cold.

A perfect timing. That'll cause
Kelly to match.

Silence, everybody!
Silence!

Ha, he made it!

The watch!

Congratulations, Kelly! You came two
from behind lake a caboose!

Why not congratulate me,
I'm his father-in-law!

What? Wait a minute, now don't
get excited. Now, listen.

- You're his father-in-law?
- Yes, father-in-law.

- When did that happen?
- Why, didn't you hear, last night.

No, I didn't! You married
my shipping clerk?

- Shipping clerk?
- I mean my daughter, you...

Listen, what about me?
My golf game.

I brought Kelly down here, didn't I?

Yes, but you're gonna lose him, Dave.

- Why am I going to lose him?
- He's going in the barn business.

The barn? Kelly?
Kelly, listen!

You're not going to desert me,
are you?

Ask the boss, my future's in her hand.

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That she certainly did #
# A wonderful job of you #

# Go home and tell your father #

# That we're marrying #
# Like respectable people do #

# Then ask her what she did #
# Ask Father what he did #

# When both of them needed #
# A darned site more than kisses #

# Go home and tell your mother #

# That her beautiful child #
# Is gonna belong to me #