Life Is Beautiful (1997)

History/Civil Wars, Cold w*r, WWI, WWII, Rebellions, Revolutions and more! w*r movies collection.

Moderator: Maskath3

w*r on Amazon   w*r Merch   Collectables

History/Civil Wars, Cold w*r, WWI, WWII, Rebellions, Revolutions and more! w*r movies collection.
Post Reply

Life Is Beautiful (1997)

Post by bunniefuu »

This is a simple story...

but not an easy one to tell

Like a fable, there is sorrow...

and like a fable, it is full
of wonder and happiness

Arezzo, Italy, 1939

I sing what I see, nothing gets by
me. "Here I am," said I to chaos...

"I am your sl*ve!"
And he: "Good!"

"For what?" Said I

Free in the end, I am! What
good is a caress when bliss...

this man came to possess?

Here I am ready

The trains are gone,
the brakes are gone

And I can resist no more. Go,
sweet Bacchus, take me...

The brakes are gone!

I heard you!

- No, they're really gone!
- Hit the brakes!

Weren't you reciting a poem?

It doesn't work!

Brake!

We're going to die! The woods!

Brake!

The king is coming!

There he is!

There's a heap of people
down there. Straight!

We have no brakes!

We have no brakes! Move!

LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL

Go for a walk

Otherwise, we'll
get there tomorrow

I found the screw

Now what do you need?

Nothing. I need
ten minutes alone

All right, I'll leave you alone

Do you want the
screw from before?

No, I want to be alone

Do I toss out the
screw if I find it?

I'm going to wash my hands

Pretty girl! How's it going?

What are you doing?

Did your Mom put
this stuff here?

No, the landlady did

Is it a market? It's beautiful

How much is it? How old are
you? Where's your mother?

- What's your name?
- Eleonora

Nice to meet you,
I'm Prince Guido

Prince?

I'm a prince, I am!

All this is mine

The principiant here...

is of the prince's principate

I'll call this place, Addis
Ababa. I'll change it all!

Out go the cows, in
come the camels!

Camels?

Even a few hippopotamus!

I have to go. I have an
appointment with the princess

- When?
- Now!

Good morning, princess!

How frightening! I almost
k*lled myself. Did I hurt you?

I've never been better

Do you always leave
the house like this?

I wanted to burn that
wasps' nest but I got stung

A wasp stung you?
There? Allow me

Hold still, princess

A wasp's poison
is very dangerous

You have to get it out

- Lie down, it'll take a while.
- It's fine now. Thank you

- Did you get stung anywhere else?
- No, thank you

What a place here!
It's beautiful!

Pigeons fly, women fall from
the sky. I'm moving here!

It's all his! He wants to fill
it with camels! He's a prince!

Exactly!

Prince Guido, at your
service, princess

I'm coming!

Goodbye, then

How can I thank you?

There's no need

If you really want
to thank me...

I'll take some eggs to make
a nice omelet for my squire

Take whatever you
want, it's all yours!

Thank you!

I'll take two... six. All
right? I'll make a nice omelet

Goodbye, Eleonora!
My regards, princess

Farewell

Here I am, Nuvolari! It's
eggs for us tonight!

All camels here!

- Where is this house?
- Turn left. We're almost there

Is your uncle sleeping with us?

What? He's lived in the hotel for over
30 years. He's a head maitre d'...

He's lending us the house.
He uses it for storage

There, we're here

That's Robin Hood,
my uncle's horse

That's my uncle's buggy and
that's my uncle's house

And inside is my uncle

Hello, dear uncle, here
we are! Hurry, it's late

Here we are. The car broke down!

Uncle Eliseo!

- Barbarians!
- Who were they?

- Nobody, just barbarians.
- Why didn't you cry for help?

Silence is the most powerful cry

Is he your poet friend?

My name is Ferruccio.
I'm also an upholsterer

You'll have to make do here. It's an
old storehouse full of odds and ends

an old passion, an
odd end in itself!

What's all this stuff for?

You can stay as long as you want.
It's not easy to be a waiter

That's the bed. Legend has
it Garibaldi slept there

Nothing is more necessary
than the unnecessary

Barbarians

The town hall is on Via Sestani,
to the right after the colonnade

This is the bathroom, equipped with
the appropriate invention of M. Bidet

There are a few books here, among
which, the Life of Petrarch

The kitchen is in there. This is a
velocipede, commonly called a bike

I have to get back to the hotel
There's only one key, don't lose it

It's so good to see you!

I'm coming, Robin Hood!

What an uncle!

Look at this!

Didn't I tell you? We're in a
city, you do whatever you want

We're free, if you want to
do something, you do it

You want to let yourself go?
You want to yell? Yell!

Stop it! What are you, crazy?

We're in a city. You can't act
like you do in the country!

You've been yelling like a madman
for three hours! You can't yell!

Mary! The key!

See? You can't yell

Understand? If you stopped
thinking so much about poetry...

you'd make your father happier and
you'd make more money than him

That's right, Oreste,
that's what I tell him too:

You have to settle down!

What a nice hat!
How does it look?

- Nice, huh? How does it look?
- Nice, but it's mine

When do I start working?

You're already late! Right away!

Get that armchair and
take it to the laboratory

- That one?
- That one. And be careful!

Good. I'm going to the
town hall. Goodbye

Goodbye, and behave yourselves

Because these are hard times...

hard, hard times!

They're hard times?

Why? What are your
political views?

Benito! Adolph! Be good!

What did you say?

I said... how are things going?

Goodbye, then

Careful, you'll break the legs!

Goodbye!

He pulled it off. He took my
hat. I'll find him, though

Benito, you're going
to get slapped!

I need to do the whole bureauratic
procedure to open a bookstore

- Does it take a long time?
- Years

Then we'd better open a file now

First you have to apply and the
department head has to sign it

In the meantime...

I almost scrambled my eggs! I've
had these here since yesterday!

I forgot about them. Thank goodness
they didn't break. Take note

I, the undersigned,
Guido Orefice...

- am applying to open - He
can't sign it right now!

What's going on?

I need a signature of yours
to open a bookstore of mine

- Miss, what's going on?
- Mr. Rodolfo, I told him

- Just one signature.
- No, I can't

My substitute will be
here in an hour. Ask him

- All I need is a signature.
- We close at 1:00 here!

It's ten to 1:00

File a complaint!

Boy, is he nasty!

Just sign a paper to open a
file. All he had to do was this

Now I have to wait for his substitute
who's coming here in an hour

I'm filing a complaint. Write: I,
the undersigned, Guido Orefice...

What a wallop!

Are you hurt? I'll help you

Come here. I didn't
do it on purpose

Don't touch me!

You can forget about
your bookshop!

No, the eggs are...

Scoundrel, I'll k*ll you!

Out of the way!

Good morning, princess

I wonder if we'll ever bump
into each other standing up!

Excuse me, but I've got to run

Farewell, princess!

- Chicken.
- That's easy

It's served whole,
bottom down on the plate

Will you cut it
for me? Naturally

I hold it in place with the
blade stuck under the wing...

then I rip off the drumstick

I cut the meat along the
bottom of the breastbone

Off go the wings,
breast and skin

Lobster

Piece of cake, Uncle Eliseo

I stick the wing
under the leg...

off goes the leg, I rip off
the lobster... stick the...

Lobster is a crustacean

Off goes the crust...

of the crustacean

Off go the crust and antennae. We
don't eat the antennae, now do we?

Off go the antennae, off
goes the lobster...

There's nothing left

We're out of lobster, but we
have some delicious chicken

I can't remember
how to do lobster

It's served fresh
from the kitchen

There's no need to touch it!

That's too easy, that's
why I didn't remember

- Continue!
- Behavior!

Stand by. Still, like this

"Waiter!" "Yes?"

In position. Stand-by
behavior. "Waiter!"

Why are they all calling me? There
must be other waiters, right?

Bowing! Piece of cake

You bow down farther

Like this. At a 45 degree angle,
just like a champagne bottle

45 degrees, even 50, 55...

90 degrees, a right
angle. 180...

How far do I bow down,
180 degrees? Like this?

Think of sunflowers,
they bow to the sun

But if you see some that
are too bowed down...

it means they're dead! You're
serving, you're not a servant

Serving is a supreme art

God is the first servant

God serves men, but he's
not a servant to men!

- There was no button here -
It doesn't go there, silly!

I have to take the car back to
my dad, he's counting on it

You'll take it back
in a month or so

No, I've got to get it
back soon. You know why?

Why?

- What? What time is it?
- The time! Were you sleeping?

Of course I was!

You asked me a question, you
turned your head and went to sleep

- How did you do that?
- Schopenhauer

Who?

Schopenhauer says that with
willpower, you can do anything

"I am what I want to be"

Right now I want to be someone who's
sleeping and I was saying to myself:

"I'm sleeping, sleeping,
sleeping." And I fell asleep

Amazing. And it's simple too

I want to try too

I'm sleeping,
sleeping, sleeping...

Don't move your hands,
you're not a juggler!

It's a matter of thought, it's
serious, and plus it takes time

We'll talk about it tomorrow

Amazing, though

Wake up

Wake up

What is it now?
What are you doing?

- It totally works!
- What works?

Schopenhauer! You know what
I just said? "Wake up!"

Bam! You woke up This
theory is incredible

- How does this all happen?
- You were yelling in my ear!

That's why I woke up!

- So I should say it quieter.
- You don't say it at all!

Ah, I'm not supposed to say it

It's deep, you have to think it

Why are you running? Slow down!

Hurry up, it's late!

Mary, the key!

Every morning she throws the key

Look!

There's that teacher!
Boy, is she pretty!

I even dreamt about her

Come with me, I'll introduce you

- Holy smokes! Stay still!
- What's wrong?

Don't move!

The one in the car. He's that jerk
the eggs fell on, the town clerk

He'll k*ll me if he
sees me! Be good

- What's he doing?
- He's standing there talking

- What's he saying?
- How do I know?

- What's he doing?
- He's saying goodbye. He's leaving

He's got a car just like mine!

There he is!

Don't move, he'll k*ll
me if he sees me!

Stay still, Ferruccio

Good morning, princess!

It's you again! How
do you do this?

This is the princess who fell
from the sky into my arms

Is he the one who sucked the
stinger out of your thigh?

Yes. We keep meeting like this.
You just suddenly show up

We could make plans to meet

- Tonight at 8:00?
- No, it's nicer this way

Let's go Dora, you'll be late

I hope we meet again suddenly

Farewell, princess!

Did you see her?
She's pretty, huh?

She likes it when
I suddenly appear

I don't believe it

"Darkness"

You're a genius!

"The more there is,
the less you see"

Solution: Darkness

Marvelous

Did you make that up?

No, but you solved it in five
minutes, it took me eight days

Darkness!

Salmon, salad and a
glass of white wine

Listen to this one, Guido

If I may, it's my turn

My dad told me this
when I was a kid

Show White and the seven
dwarves sit down for a bite

How fast can you guess what
she serves her guests next?

It sounds refined

I want to solve it right now

Eat first or it'll get cold

I don't want to, it's too late

Salad, salmon, white
wine, it's light

Snow White...

and the seven dwarves...

- Is the kitchen closed?
- Everybody's gone. Why?

A gentleman from Rome is here,
from the Ministry. He wants to eat

The kitchen is closed

Oh well, he would have
given you a good tip

The kitchen is open

Come right in

Doctor, you're not
eating anything?

Snow White and the
seven dwarves...

I know the kitchen is closed,
maybe a cold dish...

It's all delicious,
take your pick

Something light

Well, we've got meat,
a nice heavy steak...

lamb, kidneys, some
greasy breaded liver

Otherwise, there's fish

We have...

a nice fatty turbot...

eel stuffed with fatty sausage and
greased with Grand Marnier...

or some lean salmon

The salmon, thank you

Side dish?

There's a side dish too?

Feel free to choose. We have very,
very, very fried mushrooms...

buttered potatoes in Nancy
butter with a flaky sauce

Is there a small, light
salad? If not, nothing

A light salad? What a pity, the
very, very, very fried mushrooms...

were out of this world.
So, a light salad...

a lean salmon and a
glass of white wine

Perfect. As soon as possible

I'll do my best

"How fast can you guess what
she served her guests next?"

Right?

- Snow White and the seven dwarves!
- Good night, Doctor!

Good night, genius!

What did he say? Snow
white? What is he, drunk?

It's a riddle. "Seven seconds"

"Seven seconds" is the solution time
"Snow White and the seven dwarves"

If there are seven
dwarves dining...

and she serves seconds,
that means "seven seconds"

Doctor Lessing is a physician,
a very serious person

But he's obsessed with riddles,
he loses sleep over them!

Excuse me, the Francesco
Petrarca School...

The elementary school? A friend of
mine teaches there. It's beautiful

It's not far from here. Why?

Good, I can sleep
an extra half-hour

Do you have to go to that
school tomorrow morning?

They're expecting me at 8:30

Please, children, silence!
A moment of attention

The Inspector from Rome
will be here shortly

I want to make a good
impression on him

Listen very quietly and
carefully to what he says

He'll tell us some very important
things about our beautiful country

The inspector is here, ma'am

He's already here? He's early!

Sit down, Roberto!

All rise!

Good morning, princess

Good morning, Mr. Inspector.
I'm the principal

These are some of our teachers

Good

So...

How many years have you taught
in this school district?

Sixteen

Are you up-to-date
with the ongoing...

school program approved by
the Ministry this year?

Yes

Did you read the bulletin
regarding childhood hygiene?

Of course!

What are you doing on Sunday?

No, I mean, Sunday...

is St. Mary's Day,
what are you doing?

I'm going to the theater

- To see what?
- Offenbach

Right, Offenbach is playing

Fine. Well...

Thank you very much and
goodbye. I just came to...

We know

As you know, the Inspector...

came from Rome to talk to us
about the race manifesto...

signed by the most enlightened
Italian scientists

He will, and we're
very honored...

demonstrate to us
that our race...

is a superior race...

the best of all

Take your seats!

Go ahead, Inspector

- Our race...
- Is superior

Naturally!

Our race is superior

I've just come from Rome,
right this minute...

to come and tell you in order
that you'll know, children...

that our race is a superior one

I was...

chosen, I was, by r*cist
Italian scientists...

in order to demonstrate...

how superior our race is

Why did they pick me, children?

Must I tell you?

Where can you find...

someone more handsome than me?

Justly so, there is silence. I'm
an original "superior race"...

pure Aryan

Children...

let's start with something that one
says, "What so big about that?"

The ear. Look at the
perfection of this ear

Left auricle...

with a pendant little
bell at the end

Check it out! Movable cartilage!

Bendable!

Find two ears more beautiful
than these and I'll leave!

But you have to show me them!
They dream about these in France!

Races exist, children.
You bet they do!

But let's continue, I want
to show you something else

Pay attention

He said, "Inspector"?

From Rome?

The belly button!

Take a look at this belly
button! What a tie!

But you can't untie it,
not even with your teeth!

Those r*cist scientists
tried it. Not a chance!

This is an Italian belly
button. It's part of our race!

Check out this style!

Look at these muscles: Ceps...

biceps, triceps!

Look at this beauty!
Admire this hip!

Just look at the movement!

Gentlemen!

I must say goodbye now...

because I have to go,
I have an appointment

I'll make my Aryan exit
and bid you farewell

Farewell! The belly button!

I'll see you in
Venice, princess!

I can only hear out of this ear

Look at me, princess

Go on, I'm down here

Look at me, princess

Turn around, princess

Turn around, around...

- Can we get a chocolate ice cream?
- Yes, but we'll have to be quick

Why?

We have to be at the prefect's
at 8. We were invited to dinner

- Where?
- At the prefect's

Have pity on me, Lord,
let it not be true

Another dinner at the prefect's?

Your mother is coming too

Bingo!

Let's just go to dinner. We'll
stop by the prefect's for coffee

I'm not coming!

All right, I heard you! I'll
tell him we're not going!

It'll just be me and you

- Good evening, Rodolfo!
- Good evening, Mr. Prefect

I'll see you later on at my
house. I'll expect you at eight

We'll be there at eight sharp

Where is she? Did you see her?

- She has to be here.
- You're here?

On time tomorrow, got it?

Did you take that
stuff out of the car?

It's silk, don't ruin
it. Be very careful

- What an opera.
- Beautiful!

Is that one of your curtains?

No, it must be one
of my colleague's

He took my hat again!

- Let's go.
- Don't you see how it's raining?

- You go get the car!
- It's right around the corner

All right, you wait here

I'll pull up right here and toot

Give me the key!

Not the house key, the car key!

The car key? Are you crazy?

Keep him busy, you know,
the jerk the eggs fell on

Keep him busy as long as you
can, I'll see you tonight!

Inside the car
there's... Go slow!

The least you could have done is
come get me with the umbrella

You're just plain rude.
Look what a mess I am

Plus, dinner at the prefect's
gets me so nervous!

I knew it, I've got hiccups

I always get them when I'm made
to do something I don't want to

Don't you know that it takes
so little to make me happy?

A chocolate ice cream
is enough! Even two!

A nice walk together and then
whatever happens, happens

Instead you...

Good morning, princess!

This is incredible! You
owe me an explanation

No, you're the one who
owes me an explanation!

I stop under a roof and you
fall from the sky into my arms

I fall off my bicycle
and end up in your arms

I do an inspection at school
and there you are again!

You even turn up in my dreams!

Will you leave me alone! You've
really got a crush on me!

I don't blame you, but...

All right, at this point,
I give in. You win

Where shall we go, princess? To
the sea! Do you like the sea?

Yes, but they're waiting for me
at the theater. Take me back

What's happening?

Princess, do you know how to
turn on the wind shield wipers?

Step on the brakes!

Have no fear, hang on to me!

It's broken!

When did you learn to drive?

- Ten minutes ago!
- I thought it was less than that

- The top doesn't close.
- The door won't open

Wait, we're stuck!

We'll get out of here,
I'll take care of it

The important thing is
that you don't get wet

Cover yourself with this

Take it. We'll get
out of here now

I'll take care of everything

Here we go

Step right out, princess

There! Step right out!

There's a huge puddle, you'll
get your feet wet. Wait!

Here!

- Go ahead, princess.
- Where are we?

We've already been here

Me and you? When?

Don't you remember?

The night it was raining...

and I made you an
umbrella out of a pillow!

It was a beautiful night, I put the
steering wheel on my shoulder...

did a little waltz and when I
stopped in front of you...

you kissed me

Princess, your behind
is exposed to the wind

It depends on the person.
My pop was like that

He had the ability to
make me do anything

He understood me, he
knew how to deal with me

I was like putty in his hand

I always, always,
always said yes

So all these treasures
you're hiding...

there is a way to open this treasure
chest and always get you to say yes!

It's easier than you think

All you need is the right key

And where exactly is it?

Heaven knows

It's clearing up

So you were saying...

the key that always makes you
say yes has to come from heaven

Yes

I'll give it a try

If the Virgin Mary tosses it
down to me... You never know

Mary, the key!

Is this it?

Do you really have to go home? What
about the chocolate ice cream?

- Let's get it right now.
- No, not now

- Then when?
- I don't know

Are we going to let
heaven decide that too?

No, leave Mary alone. Don't
bother her over an ice cream!

No, it's much too important. We
can't decide when to have it

I have to ask her

Mary send someone to tell us how long
before we can have the ice cream!

Seven seconds!

- This is my house.
- I've gone by here a thousand times

I've always asked myself,
"Who lives there?"

I wanted to open my
store right out front

- The bookshop?
- Yes, I'll see you every day

Goodbye, then

You've been so nice to me.
All I want now is a hot bath

I forgot to tell you...

Go ahead

You can't imagine how much I
feel like making love to you

But I'll never tell anyone,
especially not you

They'd have to t*rture
me to make me say it

Say what?

That I want to make love to you

Not just once, over
and over again!

But I'll never tell you that

I'd have to be crazy to tell you
I'd even make love to you now...

right here, for the
rest of my life

You'd better run or you'll get
wet. It's going to rain again

Princess

You're all wet

My suit is no big deal

It's the hat that bothers me

I need a dry hat, but
where can I find one?

How did it go? Right, it's easy!

Mary, send someone to
give my friend a dry hat

Goodnight, princess. Farewell

Excuse me, where's the restroom?

Straight ahead to the left

If you don't get
up immediately...

I swear on your father's death bed
I'll never speak to you again

For the rest of my life!

I'm going to count to three now

If you don't get up,
I'll force you to get up

Good girl

Do you know who's
getting married?

Didn't I tell you? That
jerk the eggs fell on!

- Who's he marrying?
- I don't know

But she hasn't
even shown up yet!

Everybody's waiting

I've looked everywhere for you!

- Your uncle!
- My uncle?

Something's happened.
Come with me!

Outside! The horse!

What is that?

Is that your horse?

What a sight! What did
they write on him?

"Achtung, Jewish horse"

The usual barbarians, vandals.
It's sad. What nonsense

"Jewish horse!"

Don't get upset, they
just did it to...

They didn't just happen
to do it, they did it...

You'll have to get
used to it, Guido...

they'll start with you too

With me? What could
possibly happen to me?

The worst they can do is undress
me, paint me yellow and write:

"Achtung, Jewish waiter."

I didn't even know
this horse was Jewish

Let's go, I'll clean
him up in the morning

Take him back to the stall

Look, there in front of you!

Wait, I'll surprise her

Come with me, I'd like to
introduce you to Fido Giovanardi

Doctor Lessing! Where
are you going?

Urgent telegram. I must
go to Berlin immediately

- What are these flowers?
- They're for your departure

I'll take just one

I'll take it to my
wife. Guido's flower!

I truly enjoyed myself with you

You're the most ingenious...

waiter I've ever come across

Thank you. You're the most-cultured
customer I've ever served

Thank you

Goodbye, Doctor Lessing

By the way...

if you say my name...

I'm not there anymore. Who am I?

If you say my name,
I'm not there anymore

What is it? What did he say?

Silence!

Beautiful! If you say the word,
it's not there anymore: Silence

I'm not talking about Berlin.
In the outskirts, imagine that!

Third grade, listen
to this problem

I remember it because
it shocked me

A lunatic costs the
State four marks a day

A cr*pple, four and a half marks

An epileptic, three
marks and a half

Considering that the average
is four marks a day...

and there are 300,000 patients,
how much would the State save...

if these individuals
were eliminated?

I can't believe this!

That was my exact reaction!

I can't believe a
seven-year-old child...

has to solve this
kind of equation

It's a difficult calculation.
Proportions, percentages...

They need at least some
algebra to do those equations

That's high school
material for us

No, all it takes is multiplication!
You said there are 300,000 cripples?

300,000 times four

If we k*lled them all, we'd
save 1,200,000 marks a day

It's easy!

Exactly!

But you're an adult, they make
7-year-old children do this in Germany!

They're truly another race!

Good morning, princess!

- What did you say?
- It's here, on the cake

Why are you just standing
there? Let's go!

Let's go dance

Just a couple things, you
already know it all by now...

and you've known
for several years

Dora and I were born
on the same street...

We went to school together,
we had the same friends

Dora is the woman of my life...

and I am the man of her life

We've decided to get
married within the year

You're all officially
invited on April the 9th...

to the Basilica of Santa
Maria del Pellegrino...

and then we'll celebrate till
dawn, all together right here...

just as happy as we are now!

Kiss her! Kiss her!

- What's wrong with you?
- Nothing

- Are you all right?
- Fine

Who put this armchair here?

Are you all right?

- I'm fine - I'm sorry

- I didn't get hurt -
No, I was talking about

- Are you enjoying yourself?
- It's going fine

Go back to your table

Go on, I can do this

Are you all right?

Fine! Why are you all asking me
that? Is there something wrong?

No, nothing is wrong

But go to the kitchen

The kitchen

They moved everything
around tonight!

Look where they put the kitchen!

Peekaboo, guess who?

It's me! What, have
you gone soft?

Miss!

We finally meet, Dora

He never introduced us. You
were scared to, weren't you?

Now you don't need to come with
us to the brothel anymore!

I apologize if I've disturbed you.
Happiness and best wishes to all

You sly old dog!

What a jolly fellow!

Everything is just fine.
I'll pick it all up

I apologize

Princess!

You're here too?

Take me away

And now, ladies and gentlemen...

a magnificent surprise
offered by the Grand Hotel:

The Ethiopian cake!

Thank you! Music, maestro!

Congratulations

Thank you

Right this way, princess

But you're...

Quickly, princess

But he's...

He's that jerk with the eggs!

Ferruccio!

He's got the keys to
the house Darn it all!

Some wire! I can open
it if I find some wire

I'm a whiz with wire.
My pop taught me

I used to make toys out
of wire when I was a kid

I opened it

Joshua!

Let's go, you're going
to make Mommy late

I lost my t*nk

Don't worry, we'll find it

Where did you leave the t*nk?

- It's on the stairs
- I'll get it

Hold the bicycle. I'll get it

Here

Let's go

- Go, Pop!
- Go slow! Are you guys crazy?

You're late for school! Go!

There's a horse! Two horses!

Stop ringing that bell,
it's driving me crazy!

- It's not me, it's Joshua.
- It's not me, it's Pop!

Stop it, let me off!

Here we are

See you tonight

Go fast, Pop!

Can we buy this for Mommy?

- How much does it cost?
- 15 lire

It's a fake. It's probably a
fake cake, like your t*nk

Let's go, Joshua

"No Jews or dogs...

allowed."

Why aren't Jews or
dogs allowed to go in?

They just don't want
Jews or dogs to go in

Everybody does what they want to

There's a hardware
store there...

they don't let Spanish people
or horses into their store

Farther ahead,
there's a drugstore

I was with a Chinese friend of
mine yesterday who had a kangaroo

I said "May we?" "No, we don't want
any Chinese or kangaroos here."

They don't like them,
what can I tell you?

We let everybody
into our bookshop

No. From now on,
we'll write it too

- Is there anybody you don't like?
- Spiders, what about you?

I don't like Visigoths.
Starting tomorrow we'll write:

"No spiders and
Visigoths allowed."

I'm sick and tired
of these Visigoths!

Good morning

Everything's half-price

Guido Orefice?

That's me

You have to come
to the prefect's

Again!

- He already went - Let's go

Why?

- Is that man with you?
- Yes, let's go

All right

I'm coming too

You stay here. It won't
take long, will it?

Not long at all

Joshua, make sure you
treat the customers good!

I'll be right back

I'll take this one

It costs five lire

No, it says ten lire

Everything's half-price

Give this to your
mom and tell her...

it's from Grandma

I've never seen
my grandma before

Would you like to meet her?

Yes

You'll meet her tomorrow

Tomorrow?

Because tomorrow is
your birthday...

and your grandma will come
and bring you a nice present

A new t*nk?

No, a surprise

Give the letter to your mom

Bye, Joshua

You forgot your change, Grandma

Thank you

- When are you coming?
- In an hour or so

I'm going to stop by my uncle's to
see if he'll bring some leftovers

- Then what did Grandma say?
- She's coming tomorrow

It's about time!

JEWISH STORE

- Go take a bath.
- I took one on Friday!

He's right

You change your shirt

- I changed it on Thursday!
- Don't forget the flowers!

They're outside, I
already picked them

- I'll come with you, Pop!
- You have to take a bath, stubborn!

I don't want to take one!

Hurry up, I have to
go pick Grandma up!

- Where do you want the flowers?
- Set them down, I'll be right there

I took one on Friday!

Do you know where Joshua is?

He must be in there

Could you put those
things in order?

Why don't you show me the
flowers? They look so beautiful

They are, I'll bring them right
over. You want to see the flowers?

I'll make them come right over

Come, flowers!

Come, stand!

Schopenhauer, willpower. I
want the stand to come here

Stand, come

Stop, stand!

This stand seems
very dirty to me

Good morning, princess!

He can already read and write?

- For over a year now.
- You did a good job

We're here

I'll help you get out

No, I can do it myself

Dora, what's wrong?

Are we there?

No, it's a crossing

Will you tell me where
we're going now?

What do you mean, where?

You asked me a thousand
times! We're going...

to the place...
What's it called?

We're going...

Where are we going?

What day is it today?
Today is your birthday!

You've always said you
wanted to go on a trip!

It took me months to
plan this whole thing!

You know where we're going?

I can't tell you. I promised
Mom I wouldn't tell

You know how she
is. She'll get mad

It makes me laugh

My pop planned something like
this for me when I was little too

It was so... Boy, was it funny!

I'm not going to tell you

I want you to see for yourself

It's a surprise, you
know, it really...

It really makes me laugh

I'm tired

Go to sleep

Where are we going? Where
are they taking us?

What time is it? We're
leaving right on time

What organization!

- You've never taken a train, huh?
- No. Is it nice?

It's really nice!

It's all wooden inside, everybody
stands up, there's not one seat

- There aren't any seats?
- What? Seats on a train?

It's obvious you've
never been on one!

No, everybody stands
real close together

Do you see this line? I got the
last tickets just in time!

Hurry up, Uncle Eliseo, I don't
want them to say, "Too late..."

it's full, go back home."

Wait up, we've got a reservation!
Leave some room for us!

Look at the line!

Here we are! We
made a reservation!

Thank you!

May I help you?

There's been a mistake

What mistake?

My husband and son
are on that train

What's your husband's name?

Guido Orefice

Joshua Orefice...

and Eliseo Orefice...

are on the train too

There's no mistake

I want to get on that train too

We're all ready

Send them off then

Go! Leave!

Go back home, ma'am

I want to get on that train

Let me get on that train!

Mom's here!

They stopped the train
to let Mom get on

Uncle Eliseo

Are you happy? Did you see
this place? Are you tired?

- I didn't like the
train - Me neither

We'll take the bus back

We're taking the bus back! The
one with the seats in it!

- I told them - That's better

You see? It's all organized!

Did you see that line! People
are lined up to get inside!

Everybody wants to get in!

What game is this?

That's it!

It's that game where...

It's the game...

We're all players

It's all organized. The game is:

The men are over here,
the women are over there

Then there's the soldiers,
they give us our schedule

It's hard. You know,
it's not easy

If somebody makes a mistake,
they get sent right home

That means you
have to be careful

But if you win, you
get first prize!

What's the prize?

First prize!

- It's a t*nk - I
already have one

This one's a real t*nk!

Brand new!

Real?

Yes! I didn't want to tell you

Where's Uncle Eliseo going?

He's on another team.
It's all organized

Bye, Uncle Eliseo!

A real t*nk

What did I tell you?

Fabulous!

What a place!

Hurry up or they'll steal our
places. We've got a reservation

Two singles!

Coming through!

There's our place!

This is our bed. We'll
sleep real close

It's ugly here, it smells.
I want to be with Mommy

We will be!

I'm hungry!

We'll eat!

Plus they're really
mean here. They yell!

They yell because everybody wants
first prize. They have to be tough

Can I see Mommy?

When the game's over

When's it over?

You have to get 1000 points

Whoever gets 1000
points wins a t*nk

I don't believe you. Are
we getting a snack?

A snack?

Just ask. We're all friends here

- Look who's here! What's his name...
- Bartolomeo

Let me ask you something

Did the guy who hands out the
bread and jam already come by?

Darn it all! We missed
him by a second!

He'll come back again
though, won't he?

He's coming back

What did he say?

He asked if anyone speaks German

He's going to explain
the camp's rules

- Do you speak German?
- No

The game starts now. Whoever's
here is here, whoever's not is not

The first one to get a thousand
points wins. The prize is a t*nk!

Lucky him!

Every day we'll announce who's in
the lead from that loudspeaker

The one with the least points has
to wear a sign saying "jackass"...

right here on his back

We play the part of the
real mean guys who yell

Whoever's scared loses points

In three cases you'll
lose all your points

One: If you start crying

Two: If you want
to see your mommy

Three: If you're hungry
and you want a snack

Forget about it!

It's easy to lose
points for being hungry

Just yesterday I
lost 40 points...

because I absolutely had
to have a jam sandwich

Apricot jam!

He wanted strawberry

Don't ask for any lollipops.
You won't get any

We eat them all!

I ate twenty of them yesterday!

What a stomach ache!

But they sure were good

You bet!

Sorry if I'm going so fast,
but I'm playing hide-and-seek

I have to go now,
or they'll find me

Don't ask me anything Ask
Bartolomeo, he knows everything

Don't forget to tell
me what he said too

A thousand points?

I told you we're
going to have fun!

These guys are crazy!

This has to weigh a hundred kilos!
It's got to be 3,000 degrees in here!

Vittorino, I can't cope anymore!

- After only the first one?
- Why, are there more to move?

We're here until tonight!

Bartolomeo, what happened?
Where are they taking you?

To the hospital. I hurt my arm

We're going to die here!

I can't take it anymore!
I'm putting this down

I'll tell them I can't do
it. What can they do to me?

They'll k*ll you!

- Where does this thing go?
- Down there

Good Lord, I'll never make it!

It's got to be 10,000
degrees in here

Pop!

Look here! See? It's nice, huh?

We're signed up

When I got there to sign up...

the referee was
there and he said:

"No, you and your son
aren't on the list...

you didn't pay your dues."

I almost fell over

He said, "You can go home."
I said, "No, you go home!

Joshua and I signed up

"Give me my number!" In fact,
they gave me one. Look!

I had them put it here
too, just in case

See what a nice place...

your pop takes you to?

Did you play with
the other kids?

Yes, but they don't
know the rules

They said it isn't true
that first prize is a t*nk

They don't know anything
about the points

Did you fall for that?
They're as sly as foxes

They want to beat
you! Are you joking?

There's no t*nk? Don't
you believe them!

How many points
did we get today?

48, they took two points
away from me because...

I tripped while I was...

playing hopscotch

We laughed like crazy
today! I died laughing!

Boy, did I have fun!

I can't wait to start all
over again tomorrow!

Hopscotch, tug of w*r...

and ring-around-the-rosy

Every game. I don't even
remember all of them

"You guys are obsessed.
Stop, I'm tired!" I said

Listen, did you eat something?

Yes, but I didn't
ask for a snack

Good boy! That means
you got 12 points too!

48 for me, 12 for
you. 60 points!

This is what you get
when you get up to 60

A plain piece of bread, no jam

Here, eat this

- Is 60 points a lot?
- Are you kidding?

It sure is!

Look who's here! Bartolomeo!

How'd it go?

Any worse than this...
I got 20 of them

We got more than him

Don't tell him that.
We're in the lead!

I already told you, no
children or old ladies!

Back inside! You don't work!

The rest, downstairs!

Let's go, girls, quickly.
Come on. This way!

That one's new, she
learned right away

The lady at the door, she
seemed nice when she first came

She's the worst of all!

At least she didn't send the old
ladies and children to work

They don't send old people and kids
to work because they k*ll them!

One of these days they'll
call them to take a shower

"Children, shower time!"

The truth is, they make them
shower there, in the gas chamber

Downstairs!

How can I do this?

Vittorino!

Where'd they find
all these anvils?

Pop!

Why are you here? You're
not supposed to be here!

Go away!

Why aren't you with
the other kids?

They said...

all us kids have to take a
shower today and I don't want to

Go take a shower!

No!

I'm not going to

Go take a shower!

What are you doing here?

We're making...

the t*nk

We're building the t*nk. We're
still working on the tracks

We're running slow

You can't stay here.
Go take your shower!

I don't want to!

You stubborn thing! I'll tell
Mom! Ten points off for you!

Hide behind there. We'll go
back together when I'm done

Don't let anyone see you!

This sure is fun!

Everything!

Take everything off!
Hang it up there!

You'll get it back
after the shower

Forward!

Remember your number to
get your clothes back!

Women and children
will shower together

Are you hurt?

Thanks, Bartolomeo

From now on, you have to
hide here the whole day

If they see us now, it's
over, we're disqualified!

What do I have to do?

You have to stay.
Vittorino, help me out

You have to hide here all day

Don't let anyone see you,
especially those mean guys who yell

Remember...

stay hidden!

This is the hardest part

If we get this right, the t*nk is
ours, it's worth 120 points a day

I'll take you with me, I'll
hide you. You're gone!

Who's ever seen you before?
Who are you? Where is he?

Got it?

Gotcha!

Good boy!

Anybody here? Am I disturbing?

Come here!

Quick as lightning!

Good morning, princess!

Last night...

I dreamt about you all night!

We were going to the movies, you
were wearing that pink suit...

that I really like

You're all I think
about, princess

I always think about
you. And now...

Mommy!

Pop wheels me in the wheelbarrow
but he doesn't know how to drive!

He kills me laughing!

We're in the lead! How many
points do we have today?

Run! The mean guys who
yell are behind us!

- Where?
- Over here. Over here!

Are they dry?

They're dry

Catch

Get dressed

What happened to Vittorino,
Alfonso and the others?

They didn't make it

"If you say my name, I'm
not there anymore."

"Silence."

Thank goodness, I was getting
scared What happened to you?

They're half-crazy!

The man who does the
check-ups, the captain...

he's a friend of mine. I met
him when I was a waiter

He said they're having a dinner with
all the officials and their wives

He asked me if I wanted to
wait tables at the dinner

Maybe he wants to help me.
He might get us out of here

Have you seen Joshua?

What do you mean, "no"?

What are you doing? Come here!

No

I told you to come

No? Come on out!

Come out! Look here,
you're all dirty

Where have you been?

I had to finish playing rummy

They make buttons
and soap out of us

What are you saying?

They burn us all in the oven

Who told you that?

A man was crying.

He said they make buttons
and soap out of us

You fell for that?

Again?

I thought you were a sharp
boy, cunning, intelligent

Buttons and soap out of
people? That'll be the day!

You believed that?

Just imagine, tomorrow morning
I'll wash my hands with Bartolomeo

A good scrub...

then I'll button
up with Francesco

Darn it all!

Look! I just lost Giorgio!

Does this look like a person?

Come on! They were teasing
you! And you fell for it!

What else did they tell you?

That we get cooked in the oven

They burn us up in the oven

You fell for that too! You
just eat everything up!

I've heard of a wood oven...

but I've never seen
a man oven before

I'm out of wood!
Take this lawyer!

This lawyer doesn't burn,
he's not dry enough!

Look at that smoke!

Buttons, soap, we get
burned in the oven...

Let's be serious now

I have a bag race with
the bad guys tomorrow...

That's enough. I want to go home

Now?

Right now

It's raining now. You'll come
down with a terrible fever!

I don't care. Let's go

All right, if you want to go...

I'll get our stuff
and we'll leave

We can leave?

Naturally! What do you think they
do, force people to stay here?

That'll be the day!

Wouldn't that be great! Let's
go, we'll pack our bags...

and get out of here

What a shame, we were in the lead.
We're quitting, off the list we go

Some other kid will
win that real t*nk

There aren't any other kids,
I'm the only one left

There aren't any more kids?
It's full of them here!

Where are they then?

They're all hiding. Nobody's
supposed to see them

- This is a serious game!
- I just don't get it

How many points do we have?

Almost 687...

I told you a thousand times

Let's go, though

- We're winning. But if you want...
- We're winning?

We're in first. I told you

But we'll quit if you want

I saw the chart yesterday.
We'll go anyway, though

Bye, Bartolomeo. Joshua
and I are leaving

We're fed up here

The t*nk is done, it's ready

Clean the spark plugs
off before you start it

Open the throttle

Otherwise the cannon will
get stuck with the tracks

And the g*n, did you see how nice
it is? It came out beautiful!

Lift the emergency brake
off before you move!

Me and him are going

Joshua wants to quit

We could have gone back with a t*nk
soon, but we'll take the bus today

Me and Joshua are leaving.
So long, everybody!

We're tired of this place

Let's go or we'll miss the bus

Let's go, Joshua

It's raining, I'll come
down with a terrible fever!

It's me, Pop!

I have to tell you something
important Come here!

That little rascal's been running
away from me all morning

- Is there really a kid?
- There must be 2000!

They're like mice, they
hide all over the place!

Those creeps want
our t*nk! Stop!

Wait

I might have spotted him

I think he's nearby

Look. Go see if he's hiding
in there. I'll wait here

I'll keep a watch out

He's there, Pop!

What'd he look like? Brown hair?

That's him, then.
His name is Schwanz

He's been in there
for three weeks

He was the runner-up,
we beat him though!

Sooner or later I'll
find the others too

How many are there? It's
swarming, I told you

They're all hiding

Look, Pop!

There's a hideout!

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha!
You're out! Let's go

Holy smokes, she saw us!

Are we out?

She's coming over for you

Now it's time for
the be quiet game

You're never to speak

Swear it!

- Swear it!
- I swear

They all talk strange, you
can't understand a word

If we get through this,
first prize is ours

They're rounding up everyone in
first place. It's the silence game

Not a word, got it?

Why are you here
with the children?

Quiet! You're never to speak

I swear

I have to talk to
you. Very important

- Where? When?
- I'll signal you. Later

Thank you

I told you not to
talk to the children

Doctor, my wife is here too

Slowly

Eat slowly, it's bad for you

We're in the lead. We
just might leave early

The game finishes early

Don't make a mistake now
that we're in the lead

Slowly

Pay attention

Fat, fat, ugly, ugly...

all yellow in reality

If you ask me what I am...

I answer, "cheep, cheep, cheep"

Walking along, I go poo-poo

Who am I? Tell me true

A duckling, right?

Is it a duckling?

It's not!

A veterinarian friend of mine
sent it to me from Vienna

I can't send him mine...

until I solve this one

I thought...

duck-billed platypus...

but it doesn't go
"cheep, cheep, cheep"

A duck-billed platypus goes:

I translated it into
Italian for you last night

Well, what do you say?

Everything points to a duckling

Help me

For heaven's sake...

help me

I can't even sleep

It's the duckling!

Come here!

- I'm tired - Come here

Where are we here?

I might have taken the wrong way

Good boy, sleep.
Dream sweet dreams

Maybe it is only a dream!

We're dreaming, Joshua

Tomorrow morning Mommy
will come wake us up...

and bring us two nice
cups of milk, and cookies

First we'll eat...

then I'll make love to
her two or three times

If I can

Excuse me, Bartolomeo...

They've called those two officials
20 times. I bet they escaped

Did you understand
anything else?

You don't need to speak German!

The w*r is over. They've
running all over the place

Where are those trucks going?

The important thing is not
to get on those trucks

They leave full and
come back empty

You know where they're going?

What about the women?
What's going on?

Let's get out of this
dump and split up

We don't even have
to pack our bags!

I've been hearing machine g*ns
and dogs barking for hours

They want to get
rid of everything

I'm leaving

I'll see you in Viareggio.
We'll start an anvil factory!

So long, guys, I'm leaving

Come see

Look how mad they are! Furious!

You see? They're looking for you

Just for you. All
this is for you!

You're the last one,
the last one to find!

They're even looking
under the rocks!

The game finishes tomorrow morning.
They're handing out the award

If they don't find you
tonight, it's worth 60 points!

How many points do we have?

We've got 940 points. Plus 60?

- A thousand!
- First place! We win!

They're looking all over for
you! Boy, are they mad!

No mistakes tonight. This is it!

- Go hide in that box, quick!
- Schwanz is in there

Who?

The brown-haired boy

They got him yesterday.
He was eliminated

It's the safest place to hide.
Nobody will look there again

Let's go, quick as
lightning. Come on!

Inside!

Take this blanket in
case you get cold

I'll be back soon

I'll put them on the wrong track.
I think I saw him over there!

Pop, you scared the
death out of me!

Give me the blanket.
Are you cold?

Give me your sweater then

I'll throw it on a tree
and put them off track

They're looking
all over for you!

Everybody's yelling,
"Where's Joshua?"

They're even cursing.
They're really, really mad!

No one will find you. Bye,
now, I'll be back later

Listen...

if I'm really late
coming back...

don't you move

Don't come out. You're
not to come out...

until it's completely quiet...

and nobody is in
sight, just to be safe

Say it!

I won't come out until
nobody is around

Good boy, stubborn

Leave!

Go away, dog!

Go, dog!

Leave

Good job, Ferruccio

It works!

Is there anyone
called Dora here?

Dora, are you here? It's Guido

I know someone is hiding
here. Is there a Dora here?

Is there a Dora here? She's
Italian. She's my wife

Yes, there's a Dora here

It's me, Dora!

It's not her! Is
there another Dora?

As soon as you get out of
here, jump out of the truck!

Get off, jump out!

It's true!

Hi, boy

You all alone? What's your name?

You don't understand
what I'm saying, do you?

We'll give you a lift, come on

Come on, get up here

Come on. There you go. Ooop!

Mommy!

This is my story

This is the sacrifice
my father made

This was his gift to me

We won!

Yes, we won!

A thousand points to
laugh like crazy about!

We came in first! We're
taking the t*nk home!

We won!
Post Reply