04x06 - Lie Down and Deliver

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "L.A. Law"...

LELAND: Douglas and I have been working with a headhunter

for the past few weeks.

He's put us in touch with a few heavy hitters

with substantial client bases.

I'd like to call a meeting with one of them.

Exactly where does this new partner fit in

on the totem pole?

That would be negotiable.

Oh, this stinks.

What if at some point Randy decides to fight you for custody?

A lawyer's professional judgment

can't conflict with his personal feelings.

A lawyer himself can't be made an issue

in which you're vulnerable.

A lawyer can't keep questioning himself because...

he's afraid he could be falling for his client.

This is lousy timing, Allison.

I know that there are certain people

who think that just because they're involved with a lawyer

that they're entitled to special favors with their legal problems.

I think it's really important

that at this stage of our relationship,

you realize I'm one of them.

Roxanne is a very important person to me, David,

and if she needs my help, make no mistake, she gets it.

If that means jeopardizing my relationship with you, I'll do it.

If it means getting ugly and dredging you through the polluted sludge,

I'll do it.

I say this.

You hire a divorce lawyer to represent you

against the very person that you trusted most.

I'll give him five more minutes and that is it.

Come on, Arnie, relax a little.

As soon as the photographer's free,


-we can get this over with.
-ARNIE: The sooner the better.

Don't do me any favors, Arnie.

Let's just have our pictures taken, shall we, guys?

So, what other videos are you promoting here tonight, Dave?


-What's it to ya?
-I like to know the company I'm in.


-Never been too particular before.
-You're right,

if I had been I wouldn't have gotten involved with you.

Dave, what exactly are mood enhancement videos?

Tropical foliage and alpine vistas mostly.

You know, I have one of the largest selections of

bucolic imagery in Southern California right here.

Well, between that and your smut collection,

I'm in a real class environment.

Oh, don't put on airs with me, Arnie.

This is Dave, remember? I know you too well.

Oh, yeah? Well, here's something you don't know, Dave.

I don't need the money this bad.

Fine.

Arnie. I know you can get through this.

Allison, I suffer a lot of difficult individuals with what I do,

but this guy is too much.

Listen to me.

Dave has a real problem.

No matter how hard he works,

no matter how much money he makes,

he'll never be sexy, he'll never be glamorous,

he'll never be you.

Do you want me to stay?

Yes, I do.

Okay.

How could you have ever opted for Sifuentes

instead of me?

You don't know how many times

I've asked myself that very same question.

Is this Arnie Becker, Dave?

Yeah, Arnie, these
-
- this is Cheryl Flecksor.


-Cheryl, Arnie Becker.
-Hi.

CHERYL: I'm also here promoting a video.

Oh, really? What video is that?

"For the Love of Rubber."


-Really?
-Do you know what I do

when I'm not making p*rn films?

ARNIE: No, what's that?

I work for a process server.

One for you.

And one for you.

Big smiles, everybody.

[camera shutter clicks]

PHOTOGRAPHER: Beautiful.

♪♪ [theme]

♪♪

First up.

You may be aware that after last week's debacle

with the Melons by Mail,

I've shifted
-
- excuse me
-
-

the source of our dietary supplementation

to Jocko's cereal;

a crunchy snack that's high fiber,

high protein, and more importantly,


-rodent free.
-Yes, we know, Douglas.

The office is still buzzing about it.

May we move on, please?

DOUGLAS: There's more to buzz about.

Jocko's is currently running a cash give away contest,

which contest we won this morning,

earning the firm $,.


-You're kidding?
-ANN: What?

Each box contains a bat
-less baseball player on the cover.

If your box contains the missing bat,

as one of ours did
-
-

See?

Slides in like this. Voila!

We win $,.

Well, that's very good, Douglas.

DOUGLAS: So, you see the windfalls of a healthy diet

are endless.

Moving on. Segal vs. Blanchard.

Trial starts today. Ready.

Let me reiterate my reservation about starting a trial

at eight and a half months pregnant.


-Forget it.
-No, I'm with Douglas on this one.

This doesn't make sense.

KUZAK: Actually, it makes perfect sense.

Now, we're up against a grieving mother who lost her baby at birth.

With Ann representing the doctor,

we stand a good chance of neutralizing that sympathy.

Putting a pregnant attorney

into a maternity malpractice case

strikes me as being manipulative


-and I would
-
-
-It is manipulative, Leland,

but that's what we do.

The fact is, the jury's gonna listen to me on this

more than they would Michael.

And since this doctor is so clearly not negligent,

I don't mind giving him whatever advantage he needs.

DOUGLAS: Well, well, well.

Nice of you to join us this morning.

Yeah, well, I got an unexpected surprise last night

at my promotional and I was up a little late.

I got sued over the video.


-Sued for what?
-Malpractice,

breach of warranty,

some crackpot hen says she relied on my advice,

and it ruined her life.

And she actually filed suit?

You can wipe the smile off, Doug.

She named the firm as well.


-What?
-She sued us?


-You're all co
-defendants.
-DOUGLAS: I knew it.

I knew this damn thing would end up in embarrassment,


-and we're not covered.
-LELAND: Now, look,

I don't know anything about this lady's case,

but she's gonna have a difficult time making malpractice stick.


-Victor, you got any time?
-A little.

LELAND: All right, get together with Arnold.

Let's mark up a fast motion to dismiss,

and nip this in the bud.

Very good, Arnold.


-Lastly
-
-
-Drop dead.

At this time, the partners are very pleased to announce

the acquisition of a new partner.

Ms. Rosalind Shays will be joining us next week,

concentrating in the corporate department.

Well, what are we supposed to do, clap?

DOUGLAS: This is a major coup for the firm, Victor.

Ms. Shays has a tremendous client base,

and she stands to generate substantial revenue.

Yeah, well, forgive us for not dancing around, Douglas,

but the revenues that you're talking about

go directly into your pocket, not mine.

As for the associates here,

well, the only thing that's gonna change

is that the ratio is gonna go up seven to three.

And you know what? That stinks.

Well, you're not worried about job security, are you, Victor?

Nope.

I'll tell you what does bother me, though.

That a bunch of bottom line partners

are going around behind closed doors

trying to calculate how to make themselves richer

with no regard at all for the other lawyers in this place.

I mean, nobody introduced me to this lady.

Abby, Jonathan, anybody talk to you?


-Nope.
-LELAND: You want to meet her, Victor?

Fine. I'll set it up right away.

Dinner, tomorrow night. Let's move on.

Thank you.

DOUGLAS: That's it. We're done.

[traffic noise]

I couldn't really feel the contractions

because of the epidural.

I just remember pushing as hard as I could.

And then I remember seeing the baby...

and waiting for it to cry.

But there wasn't a sound.

What happened next, Mrs. Blanchard?

There seemed to be this panic.

The nurses were yelling at each other to do things and...

they put an oxygen mask on his head.

ATTORNEY: Your son's head?

Yes.

And then they stuck this tube down his throat.

His face, it looked blue.

ATTORNEY: I know this is painful for you, ma'am,

but can you tell us what happened next?

Suddenly, everything stopped.

Nobody was rushing around anymore.

And I saw them take the tube out of his mouth.

And I was screaming at them to tell me what was going on, and...

Dr. Segal, he said that my little boy was dead.

ATTORNEY: I have nothing further.

Did it appear that Dr. Segal was doing everything he could to save your baby?

[sniffles] I guess.

But then I found out after that maybe he didn't.

I see.

Did you do everything you could

to protect the welfare of this child?

Of course I did. What kind of question is that?

Did you ever consume alcoholic beverages

during the course of your pregnancy?

I think I maybe had wine on two or three occasions.

Uh
-huh.

And you also drank coffee, didn't you?

Sometimes. What's the point?

ANN: The point is, Mrs. Blanchard,

you ignored the express instructions of your doctor

to avoid alcohol and caffeine.

That didn't k*ll my baby.

We don't know what k*lled your baby.

Did you ever fly during your pregnancy, ma'am?

BLANCHARD: Flying is allowed.

But it's not recommended, is it?


-Objection.
-Your honor,

I'm trying to establish that this witness was derelict


-in her prenatal care.
-That's not fair!

Mrs. Blanchard, just answer the questions.

I'll give you a little latitude here, counsel.

Your niece, Melissa, came down with a viral infection

while visiting you during the sixth month of your pregnancy,


-didn't she, Mrs. Blanchard?
-Yes.

Did you make any attempt to isolate yourself from her during this illness?

I was the only one who could take care of her.

ANN: So you knowingly exposed your unborn child

to a contagious disease, didn't you?

Was I supposed to stay away from Melissa?

Talk to me, Mrs. Blanchard, I'm the one asking the questions.

You're trying to make it sound like it was my fault.


-Maybe it was your fault.
-Ms. Kelsey, that's enough.

ANN: True or false, Mrs. Blanchard,

your doctor said no drinking, you drank.

Your doctor said no caffeine, you had coffee.

Your doctor said avoid flying and contagious diseases,


-and you didn't
-
-
-Stop it!

You also smoked cigarettes, didn't you?

I didn't k*ll my baby.

You also smoked cigarettes, didn't you?

BLANCHARD: Why are you doing this to me?


-ANN: Yes or no?
-Yes, I smoked cigarettes,

but cigarettes did not k*ll my son!


-How do you know that?
-Objection!

JUDGE: Ms. Kelsey!

I have no further questions for this witness.

[sobbing]

You want to tell me what just happened in there?

What do you mean?

Ann, our defense is that Dr. Segal is innocent.

It's not that Lucy Blanchard is guilty.

She's the one who wants to point a finger here.

I was just showing the jury that we can point it

right back at her just as easily.

I'm sorry, but the whole reason for your doing this

was that you would seem more sympathetic.

You just came off like a monster in there.

Thank you, Abby,

but I'm the one who decides strategy here, okay?

Ann, I'm not snapping at you. There's no need for you to snap at me.

I'm snapping at you because you're undermining me in the middle of a trial,

and I won't stand for that.


-Are you okay?
-I'm fine.

End of discussion.

ATTORNEY: Buying "Arnold Becker's Video Guide to Divorce"

is the worst thing my client ever did, your honor.

Following Mr. Becker's instructions,

she locked her husband out
-
-

She wasn't following my instructions.

Sit down, Mr. Becker.

Your honor, I trust that Arnold Becker's arrogance

will not be imputed to me.

JUDGE: Sit down, Mr. Meyer.

ATTORNEY: The breach of warranty runs to them both.

She used their video tape to work out her separation agreement,

and as a result, she wound up with about

a tenth of what she was entitled to.

Arnold Becker specifically cautioned purchasers of this tape

that it wasn't a substitute for legal counsel.

Oh, nonsense.

What were they buying it for, to repair their cars?

Well, just a minute, Miss Adair.

Was there, in fact, a disclaimer on the tape?

Yes, your honor, there was.

It was wholly inadequate.

VICTOR: Now, even assumingarguendo

that the plaintiff was relying on Mr. Becker for legal counsel,

there was no mention at all of McKenzie Brackman on that tape,

nor can video tape production

be deemed as the practice of law, your honor.


-I'd have to agree.
-Well, accordingly then, your honor,

I would move to dismiss any and all claims

for McKenzie Brackman Cheney and Kuzak
-
-


-ADAIR: Opposed.
-Furthermore,

since malpractice liability runs only to the client,

and since the plaintiff wasn't a client,

I move to dismiss the claim of malpractice

against Arnold Becker personally.

Both Mr. Meyer and Mr. Becker had liability as sellers.

Your honor, Mr. Meyer was relying wholly on

Mr. Becker's expertise as a divorce attorney,

and should not be held liable for any legal misrepresentation

contained in the video.

All right. I've heard enough.

The malpractice case against McKenzie Brackman is dismissed.

The malpractice claim against Arnold Becker individually is dismissed.

VICTOR: Thank you, your honor.

GANZ: Your honor, does this mean Dave Meyer

is the only one liable?

Wouldn't be the first time, Sheldon.

The cheese stands alone.

The breach of warranty claim

stands against Mr. Becker as well.


-JUDGE: That's it.
-DAVE: Query, your honor.

Why is an honest business man being pilloried for that

which is so wholly outside his field of expertise?

Save you query for trial, Mr. Meyer.

No queries, yes, sir.

MAN: Next case. Kerry vs. Boucher.

What's up?

Oh...

Have a seat, Ann.

Pretty cute, Abby, going behind my back.

I came straight to you, Ann.

I brought my problem straight to you,


-and you just shut me down.
-KUZAK: All right, look,

based on Abby's account of what happened in court yesterday,

I'm not so sure it's as brilliant an idea as I thought

to have you try this thing.

Abby and I just disagree with respect to strategy, that's all.

Well, I happen to side with Abby.

ANN: Fine. I'll try to tone it down.

Are you prepared to take over?


-ANN: What? Michael
-
-
-Excuse me, Ann.

Abby, can you try this case?


-Yes.
-You can't do this.

I'm sorry, Ann, but I have to think of the client.


-You have no right to yank
-
-
-Hey!

As head of litigation, I not only have the right,

I have the responsibility.

Now, you have personalized this case

beyond the point of its effectiveness,

and I can't let that happen.

Abby, you take the witnesses, Ann, you close.

Michael, you could at least give me a ch
-
-

That is the way it's going to be, all right?

[door closes]

Hey.

Jonathan, Diana, just the two I'm looking for.


-Yeah, what's up, Douglas?
-Jocko Cereal won't pay, that's what.

They say there was a packaging screw up,

and bats were placed in over a hundred boxes


-instead of three.
-Oh, no.

They're offering bucks as a paltry compromise.

I want you to sue them for me.

You want to litigate a $, claim?

It's a $, claim.

There were false winners.

I want you to file a class action suit

on behalf of all the victims tomorrow.

A class action?

Make Benny the named plaintiff.

We'll get a lot more mileage

with a retardo leading the charge.


-We can't do that.
-Of course we can.

He's part of the firm. Make it Benjamin Stulwicz, et al.

Diana, I want you to put ads in the Times and the Examiner

notifying all prospective plaintiffs.

The distribution of their boxes was limited to West L.A.,

so the victims should all be local.

Jonathan, schedule a motion to certify the class post haste.

Uh, you don't think this is a little rash?

No, I don't.

Those cheap bastards stuck a bat in my box.

They're gonna make good.

Besides, if we certify the class,

we'll get a quick settlement,

and possibly see a nice counsel fee

of about $,.

Teach those cereal grunts to mess with me.

MAN: You can see the changes on the monitor right there.

They indicate a
-
- Yes.

They indicate a fluctuation in the baby's heart rate

about minutes prior to delivery.

And what was happening at this point, doctor?

What probably happened was the baby compressed its own umbilical cord,

cutting off its oxygen.

ATTORNEY: And what was the effect of this loss of oxygen?

DOCTOR: The effect was brain damage so extensive that

its heart and lungs could not function outside the womb.

This baby couldn't breathe, its heart couldn't pump any blood,

and that's what caused it to die so quickly after delivery.

Can something be done to save the child


-in this situation?
-DOCTOR: Absolutely.

An emergency C
-section could have easily rescued the child

before the oxygen loss had caused the brain damage.


-ATTORNEY: And what did Dr. Segal do?
-DOCTOR: He did nothing.

He waited minutes and delivered the child vaginally.

Did this wait factor into the child's death?

There's no question about it. Dr. Segal waited too long.

Had he responded and done the Cesarean,

this baby would still be alive.

ATTORNEY: Thank you, doctor. I have nothing further.

Dr. Stark...

these changes in the monitor...

are very minor.

Aren't they?

They're certainly noticeable.

They're noticeable.

But if that baby suffered brain damage

from a lack of oxygen during delivery,

now, that would be marked by a huge fluctuation

in the heart rate, wouldn't it?


-Not always, no.
-But typically, right, doctor?

STARK: Yes, typically

the fluctuations would be more remarkable.

In fact, this baby suffered extensive brain damage

long before delivery, isn't that right?

STARK: I see no conclusive proof of that.

Do you have any proof that it didn't happen that way?

Yes, based upon my review of the case,

I concluded that the brain damage occurred during the delivery.

ABBY: Based upon your review.

Did you speak with Dr. Segal or read his deposition?

STARK: No.

Did you speak with the anesthesiologist?

STARK: No.

How about any of the nurses?

I didn't have to. I reviewed the records.

Who sent you those records?


-Objection.
-ABBY: I'm offering to show bias, your honor.

The objection's overruled.

Who provided you with Mrs. Blanchard's medical records?

Her attorney, Mr. Haber.

And how many times have you previously testified for Mr. Haber?

Your honor, this is totally irrelevant.

Overruled. Mr. Haber, sit down.

In how many of Mr. Haber's malpractice cases

have you testified, sir?

I don't know.


-More than ten?
-Yes.

ABBY: More than ?

STARK: I guess, I don't know.

More than ?

No.

So somewhere between and times,

you've taken the stand to find negligence.

It's more like times, tops.

Oh, so now you do know how many times.

And you are paid for this testimony, correct?


-Yes.
-And, sir, how many babies

have you delivered in the past five years?


-None.
-None.

Well, I guess that's certainly understandable.

With all these court appearances,

who has time to practice medicine?


-HABER: Objection!
-ABBY: Withdrawn.

Nothing further.

You know, Abby and Jonathan, they wanted to be here,

but they're a little tied up with litigation right now.

I understand.

Too many lawyers can wreck an evening, anyway.

You got that right.

So, this
-
- this is nice.


-Comfortable?
-Yes,

but I think I'll feel more comfortable

when I know I've passed.


-Pardon?
-Victor,

Leland didn't arrange this dinner

out of concern for my diet.

Now, I have the ever so slight feeling

that I'm being tested tonight.

Well, the score cards are already in, Rosalind,

you've got the job.

So all that's left is for me to smooth the ruffled feathers

of the ranking senior associate.

Honey, do I look ruffled?

Maybe it's the shirt.

All kidding aside, Victor,

I know my being brought in like this

has got to make you wonder,

but if you're harboring the slightest apprehension

about what it does to your stock,

let me be the first to squelch it.

From everything I've heard about you,

your future is pretty much guaranteed.

What have you heard?

Well, that he has the highest

winning percentage in the firm;

that Michael Kuzak and Ann Kelsey have lost cases

that Victor Sifuentes probably would have won.

I doubt that.

Mike Kuzak and Ann Kelsey,

they're both first rate trial lawyers.

I know they are. But you're better.

And the truth is that you're the reason

I have confidence in our litigation department.

And you're the one that I would like handling

my clients's needs in that area.

Well, I'm flattered.


-WAITER: Here you are.
-Oh, boy.

If I want to get serious about dinner,

I, uh
-
- I have to first go to the loo, excuse me.

She's terrific.

She's poison.

What?

You're better than Kelsey and Kuzak.

I want you handling my clients.

She's playing you.

She's probably got a double header scheduled tomorrow

with Ann and Michael.

I
-
- I don't know, she seems, uh
-
-

She seemed okay to me.

Trust me on this one.

That woman is trouble.

It's your video, Arnie. You're the one who got
-
-

Oh, suddenly it's my video. When the money's rolling in, it's our video,

but as soon as there's a possible judgment looming against us,


-I'm on my own.
-LELAND: You're not on your own.

We'll provide you with whatever legal representation you need.

Big deal, you send Victor in there

to get the firm off the hook, you leave me dangling.

Arnie, that is the way the judge ruled.

ARNIE: Because that's the way you argued it.

Hey, you don't like the way I handled this,

you go represent yourself next time.

You can believe me, next time I will.

Next time I'll know that I can only count on myself.

Look, you know, if this were a malpractice case,

it would be one thing.

But our insurance carrier is not gonna kick in for breach of warranty.

Then you kick in.

Your hands were out for the profits.


-You kick in.
-STUART: He's right.

We should at least contribute to the extent we profited.

And more. We're / partners,

you people should be throwing in percent

of whatever the liability is.

Why don't you just cross claim Dave Meyer?

The truth is, you could lay this whole thing at his door.

Boy, we all know how to be lawyers in here, don't we?

We all know how to be shrewd and cold blooded in the clutch, right?


-We'll give you ,.
-There's no ceiling on


-what you would take, Leland, why would you limit
-
-
-LELAND: ,.

And that's more than we've gotten from this thing collectively.

And on a / split, that covers you up to

$, in a settlement.

You certainly can make this thing go away for that amount.


-And if I can't?
-If it's more than that,

well, you're on your own.

Boy. Isn't it great to have partners?

It's uplifting to know that I can share

my daily endeavors with such honorable people.

The common questions don't predominate.

This is not appropriate for a class action.

It's the same cause of action for everybody.

No, no, it's not.

Some of the plaintiffs got the big bats,

and some of them got the small ones.


-Excuse me?
-ATTORNEY: Different size bats, judge.

Grand prize winners got the fat bats,

and the runners up got the thinner model.

What's more, some got bunters on their boxes
-
-

Hm?

Instead of a guy swinging away.

You see, if you got the big swinger with the fat bat,

that's ,.

Uh, bunt with the slimmer model,

that's .

Now, some of these kids are just, uh, you know,

woofing the fat bats into the bunters hands,

and that doesn't win anything at all.

For God's sake.

On top of which, you've got the whole issue of privity.


-What?
-Privity?

Privity. Some of the kids actually bought the cereal,

others didn't.

I'm telling you, judge, it's a thicket.

Look, Mr. Powell, I don't care about privity

or skinny bats or fat bunters
-
-

Uh, fat bats, your honor.

All the players are evenly proportioned,

it's just the size of the bats that differs from box to box.

JUDGE: All right. The point is

is that all the class plaintiffs

are suing your client for the same thing.

You've got the same defendant,

and you've got the same basic cause of action.

The class is certified.

Your honor, there's so many sub issues here,


-you can't just
-
-
-I know.

It's a thicket.

The class is certified pending notice, Mr. Powell.

Next case.


-[chuckles] You were great.
-Thanks.

I want to see you do that next time.

Mr. Rollins.


-Nice job.
-Thanks.

Look, we obviously can't afford

the negative publicity of being sued by kids.

I'd like to see this whole matter just go away post haste.

: tomorrow in my office. We'll talk numbers.

I'll be there.

How many of those kids have you actually tracked down?

A little over .

Get as many of them there tomorrow as possible.

I don't want parents, just kids.

And have 'em there by one so I can prime them.


-Why?
-Strategy, that's why.

You think he's worried about publicity now?

Oh, boy. He's in for a treat.

All right.

What caused the baby's brain damage, Dr. Segal?

Most likely, it was compression of the umbilical cord,

like Dr. Stark testified.

But it didn't happen during delivery.

ABBY: How can you be sure?

SEGAL: Because the kind of brain damage we're talking about,

the compression of the cord would have to go on at least seven minutes.

Now, that would have sent the heart monitor

right off the chart, not the little blips we saw.

When do you think this happened to the baby?

There's no way to tell.

Obviously, the baby can't use its lungs in the womb,

and the blood supply is provided by the mother,

so it is possible to have a brain damaged child

in yet an apparently normal pregnancy.

There's just no way to see this coming.

But since there were some fluctuations in the monitor,

shouldn't you have performed a C
-section just to be safe?

Absolutely not.

C
-sections have risks, too;

risks that outweigh any possible advantage in this situation.

Dr. Segal, is there anything you could have done

to save this child that you did not do?

SEGAL: No.

Thank you, doctor. I have nothing further.

The monitor indicated some irregularities.


-Correct?
-Yes, that's correct.

HABER: And in response to this warning,

you did absolutely nothing.


-My response was exactly
-
-
-You did nothing, doctor, right?

I proceeded to deliver the baby.

Vaginally.

You billed my client for this botched delivery.


-Didn't you?
-Objection. Relevance.


-Mr. Haber
-
-
-I think it's very relevant, your honor.

This man had the temerity to bill this woman $,

and he just went through the motions.

I did everything I could to save that child.

Did the death even bother you, doctor,

or did you just go back to your office

and just whip out the invoice?


-ABBY: Objection!
-JUDGE: Mr. Haber, you're out of order.


-You make me sick.
-Dr. Segal.

I'll tell you what's sickening, sir,

a doctor who makes a fatal mistake,

and then refuses to be held accountable.


-Objection, move to strike.
-Objection!

Sustained. One more, Mr. Haber, and you're in contempt.

If I make a mistake, I expect to be held accountable.

What I don't expect is to be blamed for something that isn't my fault.

A baby d*ed, sir,

and all you can think about is your reputation?

Babies die, Mr. Haber.

No matter how hard doctors try, they still die sometimes.

But if you start suing us because we can't be God,

then soon we won't be able to even be doctors.

Her child is dead!

And you think it's unfair for her to sue.

I'm sorry for your tragedy, ma'am.

But you're chasing after me as if there were

some sort of guarantee.

There isn't.

And there never will be.

[traffic noise]

So, what now, golden boy?

I set up a meeting with DiNapoli and her attorney for tomorrow.

When were you, uh, planning on telling me about this?

ARNIE: I just set it up this morning.

Right.

I'd also rather handle this myself, Dave.

Oh, I bet you would. But I'm not gonna let you.

The only one I trust to look after my interests now is me.

Listen, we're on the same side of the table this time, Dave.

I think I can negotiate a better deal for both of us

if you and Sheldon let me do it alone.

Tell me.

What's worse, Arnie,

getting sued or having me as a co
-defendant?

Neither one's a real pleasant experience,

if you want to know the truth.

Well, that'll teach you to tie up with

a trinket salesman, won't it?

I'm not gonna play into this, Dave.


-Into what?
-Into that tired old...

"Kick me, I'm David Meyer" routine.

That's what.

You must wish I never walked into your life.

No, I don't.

I wish I'd been able to work out

a more amicable divorce between you and Roxanne.

I said some hurtful things, and I
-
-

I wish I hadn't.

You really mean that?

Yes, I do.

You know, when I first came to you

with this idea about the video,

I wasn't even interested in making money.

What'd you do it for?

I just wanted to come to the party.

That's all.

Just wanted to hear you say, "Hi, Dave, how's it goin'?"

"Hi, Dave." "Hi, partner."

Hi, partner.

Still?

You bet still.

However rocky it's been, the truth is

I'm real glad I know you.

I'm real grateful that our paths have crossed and...

I wouldn't give that up for anything.

I guess it isn't just a world of woe, is it?

No, Dave, it's not.

Something always comes along to point that out.

[door opens]

See ya.

Yeah, walk out.

The gloom is lifting, Roxanne.

Of this I feel certain.


-Arnold.
-Leland, Rosalind.

Arnie, how are you?

Dave Meyer.

How do you do.

Are you an attorney here?

Me? No. No, I'm in the direct mail field primarily.

You must know Digby Burnell.


-Would that I did.
-ROSALIND: What do you mean?

Burnell is in the pantheon of direct mail gods.

He's a titan, a w*rlord, he's Genghis Kahn.

Roz, uh, we should be going.

He's been my client for about years.

If you ever want to meet him, just let me know.

Naturally, I'm loathe to capitalize on your relationship with him.

I expect that this firm will realize

it's appropriate share

should you and Digby go forward with a venture.

Oh, I
-
- I would offer it up joyously.

Digby Burnell, please.

This is Rosalind Shays.

Good God, what an extraordinary woman.

Yeah.

Okay, they've indicated they'll go for ,,

and your insurance company will cover it.

No. No.

Dr. Segal, we can make this whole thing go away right now.

I wasn't negligent. I'm not going to say I was by settling.

We can structure it with no admission of liability.


-That way
-
-
-Oh, come on.

You fork over a quarter of a million dollars,

you're admitting guilt.

I do have a reputation to think about.


-ANN: Dr. Segal
-
-
-SEGAL: Ms. Kelsey,

look, I'm a young doctor, I'm building a practice,

I'm not going to say I screwed up when I know I didn't.

Yes, you are a young doctor.

So let's talk about the realities of

practicing medicine in the real world.

Doctors get sued when they've done nothing wrong.

Doctors lose suits when they've done nothing wrong.

You want to go into court and fight

every time you happen to be right?

Fine. You will spend your entire career

in depositions and witness chairs.

And no insurance company's gonna carry you.

So you're saying I've got to bend over and take it

because it's the cost of doing business.

ABBY: That's the big picture.

The immediate picture is we could lose this case.

And the way your coverage reads,

you could be on the hook personally

for anything over a $, verdict.

I don't think you should risk it.

I'm not settling.

If they come in at half a million,

you're gonna have to sell your house.

I wasn't negligent.

That baby didn't die because of me.

No deal.

♪♪

[traffic noise]

There's really no merit to her case?

Roxanne, this woman is a bottom feeder.

Whatever works its way down to her, she eats.

She's a professional victim.

She wakes up in the morning, realizes her life is trash,

and asks who can I sue.

She collects injustice like some people collect stamps.

I'd like to crush her with a rock.


-Ladies.
-Arnie.


-Miss DiNapoli.
-How do you do, Mr. Becker.

Could I get you anything, a cup of coffee, something cold to drink?


-ADAIR: No, thank you.
-DINAPOLI: No.

Thanks, Rox.

In that case, why don't we get started.

This is the figure that I'm thinking of.

[chuckles]

Well, your thinking needs adjustment.

Why don't you show it to your client?

Danise.


-You think this is low?
-Oh, yes, I do.

I'd like you to consider something.

That figure is payable in full immediately upon

the signing of a release that would cover me,

and cover Dave Meyer as well.

If you accept it,

we can dispose of this matter amicably.

I'm willing to review the agreement

that you and your husband worked out.

I'm willing to advise you.

I'm willing to serve as your attorney

should you choose to engage me.

I'm her attorney.

You're not a matrimonial attorney, Leah.

How much less is this amount than what you would consider a good settlement?


-It's considerably less.
-ARNIE: Forgive me,

but I would beg to differ.

If you reject that offer, you and I will go to court.

Papers will be drawn, depositions held.

All the while, you'll be paying Leah

somewhere in the neighborhood of $ an hour.

I, on the other hand, will represent myself.

The earliest possible date that our dispute

would come to trial would be
-
-

and Leah, you can bear me out on this
-
-

sometime in .

After trial, if you're awarded much more than this,

I will simply appeal.

That process should take us into .

Even if you win every step of the way,

considering your legal fees, the rate of inflation,

I'd be surprised if you broke even.

Leah, I'm accepting his offer.

Mr. Becker, I'll have my divorce file sent right over.


-Call me Arnie.
-Arnie.

I look forward to hearing what you think.

You'll hear from me early next week.

Leah.

Yes?

It's always a pleasure.

Mm
-hm.

I hate you both.

Oh, yes, Dr. Segal said that they did everything they could,

and they put up all of these other doctors

to say that he wasn't negligent.

Doctors do that for each other.

They stick together.

Because if any doctor gets sued,

it's bad for all of them.

But occasionally,

a physician is honest and says what really happened.

Dr. Stark reviewed these records.

He told you that Dr. Segal should have saved this baby.

And he didn't.

He told you that because that man did nothing,

a little baby's life ended.

A bereaving mother has to deal with that.

He should have to deal with it, too.

You've heard seven independent and objective experts

tell you that Dr. Segal was not negligent.

The only thing they have to counter is

the honorable Dr. Stark, a professional witness, who, for a fee,

will say anything Mr. Haber wants him to.

No matter how much you sympathize with Mrs. Blanchard,

she has no case.

I got up and att*cked this poor woman the other day

because I desperately wanted it to be her fault.

And you know what?

If it couldn't be her fault, I secretly wanted it to be his.

Because like her,

the last thing I wanted to accept

was that these things just happen.

She screwed up, he screwed up, somebody did something wrong,

please, because little babies don't just die.

They can't.

But they do.

I've picked out a name for my baby.

I've even bought clothes.

Some pink, some blue.

My husband and I have looked forward to this for so long

that we've totally prepared for everything.

Except for the possibility that something could go wrong.

But the reality is...

it could.

The reality is that doctors can do everything right

like Dr. Segal did,

and mothers can do everything right,

and an innocent little child

still doesn't make it.

I know you don't want to accept that.

God knows she and I don't want to accept that.

But... we have to.

We have to.

♪♪

[screaming, yelling]

Okay, kids, let's settle down now.

All right, come on, come on, get off the table now.

Off the table, please, please.

All right, now listen.

The cereal company has just proposed

a new settlement offer of $.


-[children booing]
-Oh, for God's sake,

I can't run a law suit like this.

They're the clients, Mr. Powell,

I can't ignore their
-
-

This is bloody extortion.

The film crew is due here in minutes.

Good. Help Jonathan calm the troops.

Excuse me.

This is crazy. I mean, it's just crazy.

DOUGLAS: There's nothing crazy about calling a press conference

to announce a class action of human interest.

That's crap. You're trying to jack me up

with the thr*at of more publicity

so that I'll roll over and
-
-

What the hell is this?

The named plaintiff.

The newspapers might want head sh*ts.

That's blackmail. Using kids as food for the press,

a
-
- a Ret*rded man as a poster boy.

A
-
- Oh, for God sake.

Look, Mr. Powell,

you can't risk this law suit.

Aside from the publicity,

you're looking at protracted litigation

with a half a million dollars of exposure,

not to mention the damage public relations wise.

I'm offering you a quick out

for $ per person.

POWELL: This is totally unethical.

Tell it to the ABA.

The press conference starts in minutes,

and this has got to make the networks.

Excuse me, I'd like to get a sh*t of the three of you together.

No! No.

if it's done today.

We get these kids out of here,

and the only thing that gets to the press

is a statement from both of us

that this whole thing is over.

I have to run it by the guardians,

but you can consider it done.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

JONATHAN: So what's gonna happen is Mr. Brackman's gonna

come in here and hopefully we're gonna get some money, okay?


-You like ice cream?
-KIDS: Yeah.


- a piece.
-[cheering]

Way to go, Doug.

I can't believe you actually pulled it off.

I'm good. Merry Christmas, kids.

ALL: Merry Christmas!

JUDGE: Foreperson, has the jury reached its verdict?


-We have, your honor.
-JUDGE: What say you?

WOMAN: In the matter of Blanchard vs. Segal,

we find in favor of the defendant.

[crowd murmuring]

Oh, wow. [chuckles]


-Oh, thank you.
-JUDGE: Members of the jury,

thank you very much for your service.

This case is completed, and we're adjourned.

Another Kn*fe in the ribs, another reminder that

your partners aren't your friends.

Arnie, enough already.

You settled, you're done with it.

I also know more about the people I work with.

So that's good.

Painful but necessary.

Right.

Relationships change.

That's right, they do.

What do you mean?

I mean, relationships change.

You just changed the subject, didn't you?

Yes, I did.

So what are we talking about now?

[sighs]

We're talking about the fact that

Chloe's staying with her father.

We're talking about you taking me home,

and me asking you in.

We're talking about what happens then.

What does happen then?

Well, a number of things might happen.

We could remain cautious and back away from each other.

We could rip each other's clothes off.

Or we could rip each other's clothes off.

You think that would be a good idea?

I think relationships change.

I'll just be a minute.

[doorbell rings]

[door opens]

Thank you for letting me come.

I wanted to see you in person.

Okay.

I don't think I ever let you know

how truly sorry I am for you loss.

I never had any doubt about that.

You know, when it happened,

people told me

better it happened like that

than after a month or a year.

Better that I never had a chance to get attached.

How can they think

that you can carry a life around inside you for nine months

and not be attached?

Yeah.

It's funny how things go, Ms. Kelsey.

You were my enemy in there.

And still, I knew that...

you were the only one who could understand.

I wish you the best.

I wish you the best, too.

[sighs]

♪♪