Faculty, The (1998)

[bunniefuu]

[Coach] Look alive!

Damn it! g*dd*mn it!

You call that blocking,
you p*ssy-pukes?

You gotta pick up the linebacker!

g*dd*mn it! Get off the f*cking field,
you limp-a*s blowdicks!

Consider yourselves dead
Friday night! Dead!

You gonna rejoin
the living tomorrow, Stan?

You've got to feel the pressure
closing in on you!

Then you get rid of the rock!

Now get focused or
get the f*ck off my team!

♪ Your neighborhood was so alive ♪

♪ And every kid on the whole damn street ♪

- sh*t!
- [Gabe] Let it go.

♪ Now the neighborhood's
cracked and torn ♪

♪ The kids are grown up
but their lives are worn ♪

♪ How can one little street ♪

- ♪ Swallow so many lives ♪
- [Yells]

♪ Yes, it's won ♪

♪ Nothing's free ♪

♪ Fragile lives ♪

♪ Shattered dreams ♪

[Grunts]

[Grunts]

This better be important or somebody's
gonna be doing laps until sunrise.

Yeah? What?

[Drake] Please let me finish this
so we can go home. It's late.

Mrs. Brummel, with all sadness,
no new computers.

Oh, but--

But get the service guy down here
and get the old ones juiced.

Mr. Tate... you're dreaming.

Absolutely no field trips
to New York City.

Look, I don't think
that you understand.

You're not getting out of Ohio.
Rethink it.

And, finally, Mrs. Olson.

There's just no money
for a musical this year.

But I bet the football team gets their
new jerseys and their new equipment.

Have you seen the football stadium
on a Friday night, Mr. Tate?

The entire town is there.

This is a football town,
let me remind you,

and, yes, the team will get
new jerseys and new knee pads...

and new jock straps and anything else
they want in the name of education...

because that is what
the school board wants.

Because that is what the parents
in this town want.

I'm sorry.

My frustrated hands are tied.

[Sighs]

I don't see why we can't have
a few new computers...

so the children will learn
a little set up.

Miss Drake, the Drama Club had their
heart set on Guys and Dolls this year.

Well... maybe if they use
last year's set from Our Town.

sh*t, I forgot my keys.
I have to go back.

See you in the morning, Mrs. Olson.

[Footsteps echoing]

♪ [Softly singing
"Guys and Dolls" tune] ♪

[Opens drawer]

[Distant door opening]

[Resumes singing, gasps, sighs]

Coach Willis.
What can I do for you?

You look...
very, very pretty tonight,

- Miss Drake.
- Have you been drinking, Coach?

I'm sorry to bother you,
but, uh...

I can't seem to find a pencil.

You don't need a pencil, Coach.
You need a good night's sleep.

- I need a pencil.
- Sleep it off, Coach.

Do you have a pencil?

Jesus Christ, yes, I have a pencil.
I have plenty of pencils.

Look, why don't you and your pencil
go home. It's late.

You look...
very, very pretty tonight.

Harassment has a really fine line, Coach.
Haven't you read your handbook?

[Screaming]

- [Groaning]
- I've always wanted to do that.

[Coach grunting, Drake gasping]

[Microphone feedback]

[Coach, over intercom]
Would Miss Drake please report

to the principal's office?

[Panting]

[Grunts, screams]

[Glass shatters, both struggling]

- [Knocking]
- Oh!

- I forgot my grade book.
- Unlock the door! Coach Willis attacked me!

- Unlock the door, g*dd*mn it!
- I don't have my keys.

- Let me get help.
- No, don't leave me!

- Where are your keys?
- Wait--

In the office.

I'm gonna get my keys now,
Mrs. Olson.

- Please, let me get help.
- [Drake, calmly] No, just talk to me, okay?

Miss Drake...

please be careful.

♪ [Drake sings softly] ♪

He's insane.

[Mumbling softly]

- [Grabs keys]
- Miss Drake, he's coming!

Hurry! Hurry!

[Gasps]

Hurry, Miss Drake!
Hurry!

- [Fumbling with keys]
- [Olson] Hurry!

- [Drops keys] sh*t!
- No!

Hurry!

Help me!

[Coach banging door, growling]

- [Rattling door]
- Prick.

[Groaning]

I always wanted to do that.

[Talking, indistinct]

[Car engine roaring,
music blaring]

[Screeching]

[Closes trunk]

- [Gasps]
- You f*cking b*tch!

What the hell were you doing?

[Girl laughs, talking]

Whatever. All right?

Sorry. My fault.

Crash and burn, Casey.

Get out of the f*cking car,
you stupid b*tch!

g*dd*mn you!

- Whoa, whoa. You okay?
- Walk much?

You ran into me, beast.

[Delilah] Okay, now listen up.
Since we're all wearing the same uniforms,

let's keep the hair the same.

No hair spray, no teasing,
just elegant.

- Simple. Great.
- Hey.

Ooh, Stan, watch it. Those are Estee
Lauder lips. Takes 72 minutes to apply.

Sorry.

- Hey, can we talk?
- I can't right now.

I need a new headline for
the school paper. It's important.

- So is this.
- I'm sure you think so, honey.

In fact... it could be just
the story you're looking for.

Do the words "Editor-in-Chief"
mean anything to you?

Leave the news to me, okay?

Later.

- [Bell rings]
- That chick weakens legs, meat.

- [Student] One, two, three...
- [Casey] No, not the pole!

[Student] Oh! Yeah, do it again!

- Yeah!
- [Laughing]

[Groaning]

Excuse me.

Could you please tell me where
the office is? It's my first day here.

Thank you.
I'm Marybeth Louise Hutchinson.

I really love what you've done
with your nose ring.

It really brings out the color
in your eyes.

[Couple arguing]

You're such a f*cking p*ssy.
Hey, f*ck you! f*ck you!

f*ck you, man!
f*ck you!

Dude, that's not me.

Doesn't even look like me.

It's fifty bucks, right?

- Does that look like me?
- It's the new you.

[Sighs] I don't know, man. How do we
know these things are even gonna work?

Trust me, man.
I'm brilliant.

Then why are you repeating
your senior year?

All right, look, man.

I'll throw in
a couple hits of this.

Scat. My own recipe.
Guaranteed to jack you up.

[Snorts]
Up the nose, right?

Whatever works, man.

f*ck.

[Students clamoring]

- [Bell rings]
- [Girl] Excuse me, Mr. Tate.

[Groans]

[Harper] Try to remember, Harry,
the projector's got teeth.

[Coughs]
Sharp ones.

[Harry] We should be getting hazard pay
for this sort of faulty equipment.

- [Harper] Yeah, right.
- [Furlong] Hey, good morning, Miss Harper.

- I, uh-- I called you this weekend.
- [Gasping, coughs]

I got your machine.
How's your cold?

- [Harper] Oh, I can't get rid of it.
- Hello. How are you today?

- [Sneezes]
- [Brummel] A bit tired, but no complaints.

- Oh.
- I-I got it.

Can we say, "retirement"?

- [Gasps]
- Maybe you should just go home.

[Sighs]
No, thank you.

I'm saving my sick days
for when I feel better.

[Sighs]

Maybe I should just put
a pen in my eye.

[Tate sighs]

When will that b*tch turn
the air conditioning back on?

[Male teacher] Hey, speaking of which,
has anybody seen Principal Drake?

[Tate] Oh, maybe she had
a sunstroke and died.

[Coach gulping]

What's up with the coach?
He's thirsty.

[Tate] Probably a pregame ritual.

Just looking at him makes me
want to take a piss.

Good morning, Mrs. Olson.

You look very, very pretty today.

So, um...
what was Crusoe's...

greatest fear?

Anyone?

Uh, yes, Zeke.

Crusoe's afraid that he'd be
stuck on that island forever...

with nothing but calluses.

- [Classmates chuckle]
- [Miss Burke] No, that-that's not correct.

Isolation was his greatest fear.

Yes, but...

his external existence
in no way compared...

to the internal agony
of the loneliness he felt.

That's very good.

- Like I said, calluses.
- [Classmates chuckle]

[Girl] So Cathy tells me one thing,
and then Liz says another...

and then, of course,
Jenny's got her own story,

so which one do you
want me to print?

Print them all.
He's a jerk.

- Hey, we need to talk.
- No, Stan, baby, I'm in a crunch.

Could we back-burner it?

- I'm quitting football.
- You're not playing tomorrow?

I'm not playing this year.
Would you listen to me?

I'm quitting the team.
I'm not playing ball... anymore.

- What brought this on?
- [Sighs]

Well, I've been weighing
the importance of being a jock...

- with my impending future, and I decided--
- You just decided?

Stan, what about college? The football
scholarship is your only shot.

If I quit now, I can work
harder at studying,

maybe raise my grades a little.

I'd rather go to college...
based on my intellect.

You're not good at studying.

Stan, you're good at football.
Stick to what you're good at.

Yeah, I've always been good at football
and basketball and every other sport I try.

I think maybe it's time I try something
I'm not so good at, something different.

And what am I supposed to do while you're
on a yellow-brick quest for a brain?

- What?
- The accepted social order...

is head cheerleaders date star quarterbacks,
not academic wanna-bes.

Don't be superficial.

"Superficial."
Four syllables.

That's really good, Stan.
You're on your way.

Let me know how
the cancer cure goes.

[Bell rings]

[Sighs] I was hoping
you'd be with me on this.

[Student coughing]

Now, if everyone will turn
to chapter four...

"The Nation of the State."

"Only through conformity
among the masses...

can the unified state offer the benefits
of power order and security."

Actually, we covered that
last week, Mr. Tate.

We're on chapter five.

[Sighs]
Whatever.

Now if you could all please
join Stan on chapter five...

"Individual Action in Society."

♪ Short circulated ♪

♪ Sleeping through the dopamine ♪

♪ When you've got nothing
you've got nothing to fear ♪

[Marybeth] What are you reading?

Double Star.
Robert Heinlein.

You one of those
science fiction people?

Y'all believe in alternate universes
and alien beings and stuff?

I'm feeling pretty alien
myself today.

I'm Marybeth Louise Hutchinson
of Atlanta. I'm new here.

- No sh*t.
- What's your name?

Why do you want
to know my name?

'Cause I don't have any friends.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you seem
to have one less than that.

- So I just thought--
- Stokely, are you seducing the new students again?

Hi. I'm Delilah.

- Happy to have you at Herrington.
- Thank you.

Don't you love the way Stokely accessorizes
different shades of black in her ensemble?

- f*ck you, gutter sl*t.
- I don't know why you insist...

on being such a bad example
for your people.

What people?

I hope you're not a violent l*sbian
like your new friend.

[Marybeth] Uh, no.

I'm not aware of any lesbianism
in my lineage.

Oh, that's too bad, Stokely. You'll just
have to keep looking for Miss Right.

Bipolar b*tch.

[Sighs]
Violent.

Yeah.

- What are you doing?
- I was just eating my lunch, sir.

This ain't the cafeteria, son.

Yes, sir.
I'm sorry about that, sir.

You're, uh--

- I forget your name.
- Casey.

Right.
I've seen you around.

You're not really into sports.

I don't think a person should run
unless he's being chased.

"Being chased."

I like that.

Get outta here.

- Mrs. Brummel, may I have a word with you?
- Certainly.

Man, get a f*cking eye dog.

Maybe if you didn't paint
your f*cking eyes shut.

- Mr. Furlong.
- Present.

Found something on the football field.

Thought you might want
to take a look.

- What is it?
- I was hoping you could tell me.

Want to be lab partners?

I didn't know you were a l*sbian.

I don't think I've ever
met one before.

Have you been out long?

I think it's very impressive
and evolved of you--

I'm not a l*sbian, all right?

Be one. Please.
Fly free.

You were right about me. I don't have
any friends, and I like it that way.

- Being a l*sbian is just my security.
- Your security against what?

People like you.

[Laughs]

Complex.

Certain mesozoan...

only exist in the kidney
of certain squid and octopi.

- Which doesn't make sense because--
- This is Ohio.

Right.

It's a pelagic organism.

- What's pelagic?
- A sea-dwelling organism.

Exactly.

But I don't recognize
this surface tissue at all.

Casey, I don't want to blow smoke up your butt,
but I think you found a new species.

[Scoffs]
Yeah, right.

It could happen. New species
are discovered every day.

- Don't be so cynical.
- Could it be gnathostomulida?

No.

They escaped detection
till the mid-20th century.

You just know everything.

I'm a contradiction.

Check the mesodermic follicles
on its underbelly.

- What does that mean?
- It means we gotta call the university,

let them take a look, maybe get in
on some of that federal grant money.

Our secret...
all right?

- Hey, Stokely, maybe it's from your planet.
- Blow me, blood fart.

Whoa.
Did you see that?

What is it doing?

Cha-ching.

- [Zeke] You think it's amphibian?
- Water resuscitated it.

[Casey] Yeah, but couldn't
this k*ll it?

Yeah, you don't want to drown it.

- One way to find out.
- Oh, man.

- [Class gasps]
- It's all right.

It's okay.

Mr. Furlong, what are you doing?

I'm just gonna check his prostate.

Actually, the surface texture changed,

so... I want to feel it.

It can replicate.
Jesus.

Ah, f*ck!

g*dd*mn it!

- I'm okay.
- [Casey] It has teeth.

Where did it get teeth?

I'm gonna call the university.

[Whistle blows]

[Stan] I've just been
thinking ahead, Coach,

and, uh...

I've decided to quit the team...

and concentrate on my academics.

Okay.

Stan, we'll miss you.

That's it?

Well, what do you
want me to say?

My star quarterback comes to me the day
before we play Brun County,

the only team in the district
that can kick our a*s,

and tells me he doesn't
want to play.

There's something up with that.

You seem to be going through
some life-defining turning point,

and I'm not gonna stand in the way
of the human condition.

You do what you have to do.

Thanks for not reaming me, Coach.

What kind of human being
would I be if I did that?

[Hooting]

Hey, give me that back.

Hey, yo, piss wad,
you're in my way.

I'm sorry.
I was breathing here.

Yeah, that's the problem.
You're occupying my air, you a**l probe.

Hey.

Yo, Stan.
Tomorrow night, right?

That's right.
We'll k*ll them!

We draw blood! Yeah!

- It must really blow being you.
- You have no idea.

Yo, Casey, is that you?

- Mrs. Brummel, what the f*ck--
- Please.

Help me.
I can't breathe.

Get help!

You don't know what's happening.
They want everyone.

- It's okay.
- [Whimpering]

[Bell rings]

[Students chattering]

Is Mrs. Brummel gonna be okay?

Stan, Mrs. Brummel has been
diagnosed with cancer,

and she's on a lot of medication
at the moment.

It causes disorientation.

We were hoping that she would get through
the school year, but unfortunately it--

I hope you can understand the
sensitive nature of the situation.

[Stan] Yeah.

Yeah, I can keep it quiet.

[Olson] Casey? You understand?

Casey, you understand?

- Casey?
- Yeah.

Sure.

[Horn honks]

- It's Neve Campbell?
- And Jennifer Love Hewitt, right?

Yep. Party of prettiness.

- And they're naked?
- Full frontal.

Zeke, you cannot conduct
personal business on school property.

Well, Miss Burke,
we have a problem...

because I'm sitting on my car
and that's my property.

Well, um, I've had complaints
from several students...

that you've sold them
mind-altering substances.

You want to tell me about it
or take it up with Principal Drake?

You're too tense, Miss Burke,
but I've got just the thing for you.

You know, Zeke, I'm the authority figure here.
It's time you realized that.

"For gentle relief of blockage
caused by dietary stress."

- Chocolate-flavoured laxatives.
- You know...

if you applied just five percent...

- of that intellect to your studies,
- Not a chocolate lover, huh?

you could have made up
your finals last summer.

- You didn't have to repeat your senior year.
- How about these?

Condoms.

Magnum-sized,
and they're cherry-flavored.

Oh, come on, Miss Burke.
They're on me.

That's so rude.

I need a lead story.
I have no page one.

Well, we found a new phylum
in Biology. It's bizarre.

Really bizarre. Mr. Furlong thinks
it might be a new species.

Ooh! Let me race to the stands
for that issue.

Why do you rag on me so much?
What did I do?

Nothing.

It's just your fate.
You're that geeky Stephen King kid.

There's one of you in every school.

- We can't go in here.
- [Sighs] Come on, Casey.

You're with me.
Be brave.

Okay, so what are we looking for?

Anything.

Nurse Harper is medicated.
Big surprise.

Hey.

No, I exposed Mr. Tate's alcoholism
last year. Nobody cares.

Well, his wife certainly didn't
when she ran off with the baby-sitter.

[Scoffs]
God.

- You can be such a...
- What?

pretty cool human being when you're
not being a first-class, grade A b*tch.

You hitting on me, Casey?

No. No.

I just think you can be cool.

Sometimes.

This not being one of them.

[Laughs]

[Woman's voice, indistinct]

[Panting]

[Pouring water]

- Where's Brummel?
- She didn't make it.

Her body was too old.
The heat got to her.

[Olson] Be careful of the climate.
It compromises your nervous system.

It makes one impulsive.

[Coach] Has the entire faculty
been commuted?

Almost.

- What about the students?
- Soon.

- [Door opens]
- [Blowing nose]

What are you two still doing here?

I thought I was the only left.

There are not enough drugs
in this world.

[Harper coughs]

[Coughs, bangs on closet door]

[Gasps]

What?

I have a pain.

Right here.

[Gasps]

[Gasping]

Get off of me! Jesus!

[Screaming]

[Muffled whimpering]

[Gasps]

- [Roars]
- [Screams] Casey!

[Struggling]

What the hell is going on?

- Slow down there.
- Help us. They k*lled Mrs. Brummel. They're after us.

- What are you talking about?

- Coach Willis.
- And Mrs. Olson.

- What's going on?
- Ask Nurse Harper, okay? They attacked her.

Who attacked who?
What is going on?

I have no idea. I joined this right
in the middle of it.

Mrs. Brummel wigged out in the shower,
and then we found her body in the faculty closet.

What were you doing
in the faculty closet?

- Coach Willis and Mrs. Olson attacked Nurse Harper.
- Why would they do that?

There's Nurse Harper.
Just ask her.

Ah.

Now we can get to
the bottom of this.

- Oh, f*ck.
- Delilah, run!

Delilah, wait!

[Siren blaring]

In here?

Yes. The body was in the closet.

And... why would Mrs. Brummel
be in the closet?

Because they k*lled her.

- Oh, that's right.
- [Coach] Hey, Casey.

Sorry about that mix-up earlier.
Didn't mean to scare you.

Apparently, there's been
a misunderstanding.

Still, if we could just
see inside the closet.

Certainly.

- It's a doll.
- Meet "Resuscitation Annie".

We use her to teach C.P.R.
to the students,

although I guess she does
resemble Mrs. Brummel slightly.

- You dialled 911 for a dead doll?
- That wasn't there.

They put that there.
Look, I'm not making this up.

- You gotta call Delilah.
- We called her. She isn't home.

She was here with me.
She saw it too.

They attacked Nurse Harper.

Nurse Harper is epileptic.
She's prone to grand mals.

She had an attack.

[Olsen] Luckily, she carries
her medicine in her bag,

so we were able to help her.

We think it was brought on
by this terrible cold she's had.

I took her home myself.

- You can call her if you like.
- [Officer] It is procedure.

You can use the phone in my office.

That was some fast running
you did down the hall, son.

We could sure use your speed.

There's plenty of chasing
on the field.

Did you hear that, Casey?
He said you had speed.

- Thank you.
- Good luck in that game tomorrow, Coach.

[Clicks tongue]

This way.

Case, what's gotten into you?

Evelyn knows someone downtown.
A professional.

- I'm gonna make an appointment.
- [Thud inside office]

He's a straight A student,
and now he needs a professional?

- Christ.
- I don't need a shrink. I know what I saw.

Well, we've just spoken...

with both Mrs. Brummel
and Nurse Harper.

- They got him.
- There's nothing here.

Just some kid looking
for some attention. Let's go.

All right.

Well--

I am so sorry, Miss Drake.

Maybe if you and I spoke privately,
we could come up with--

No. No, Mom.
Maybe you're right.

Maybe I should see
this woman, this doctor.

Can we just go?

We'll take care of this at home, Miss Drake.
Again, sorry for all the trouble.

I can see how it all
got out of hand.

[Chuckling] It's a...
pretty bizarre series of events.

It's our fault.
It won't happen again.

See you tomorrow, Casey.

[Mother] Check his school books.

They hide the drugs in the spine
of the book. We saw it on Dateline.

- What are you on, son?
- I'm not on drugs.

That's government property, Dad.

sh*t.

Look, we love you, son.
We want to help you.

Then believe me.
I'm telling the truth.

Something really weird is
happening at school. The teachers--

- Something's happened to them.
- Don't push it, all right?

I'm bending as far as I can,
but if you push it--

Just let me call Delilah.

Please?

Okay, that's it.

Your privileges are now over.

No phone. Sorry. Over.
No internet.

You'll go to school, straight to school,
and you'll come straight home. You got it?

I'm not going back to that school.
They're waiting for me.

Oh, you'll go. If I have to tie you
to the desk myself, you'll go.

No music.

His porno.

Porno.

[Sighs]

Sorry, pal.
No more flogging the bishop.

We are gonna get you help.
Don't worry.

Get your room cleaned up.

[Thunder rumbling]

[Thunderclap]

[Grunting]

- [Gasping]
- What the hell do you think you're doing?

Dad. They're here.

- [Dog barking]
- [Casey] The faculty.

Get in the house, now.

I'm losing it.

♪ [Rock music playing] ♪

♪ Lines form on my face and hands ♪

- Go on, son.
- Dad, I'm begging you.

Please.

Come home right after school.

Your mom's looking into a doctor.

♪ I'm a boy ♪

♪ And I'm a man ♪

♪ Baby's brain and an old man's heart ♪

♪ Took 18 years to get this far ♪

[Students chattering]

[Coach] Mr. Connor.

Whoa! Delilah.
Wow, you look--

Don't. Come on.

[Drake, over intercom]
Your attention, please.

Will the following students
report to the office...

James Archuleta, Tina Dannhausen,

and Delilah Proffitt.

- This is all your fault.
- [Casey] What do you mean?

Do you think I'm in drag
for the aesthetics?

They're after me.

- Did you tell your parents?
- My mom didn't believe me.

She drinks.
It was a nightmare.

- Look, we have to go to the police.
- No.

- They've got the police.
- We don't know what they've got.

Look, you saw it.
Mrs. Brummel was dead.

- They attacked Nurse Harper.
- "They"? Who are "they"?

Casey, we don't even know
who "they" are.

Why did she act like
everything was okay?

It's a devil's cult or something.

Maybe they worship comets.
Who the f*ck knows?

I'm not gonna stay in a handicapped
bathroom for the rest of my life.

- They couldn't have gotten to everyone.
- Where are you going?

- I'm going to find Stan.
- Stan? Why Stan?

[Gulping]

[Drake, over intercom] Will the following
students please report to the office...

Jennifer Qulick, Randy Knotson
and Thomas Nicks.

You should just go talk to him.

No way.

[Groans]

I'm sorry.

So you-- are you ready
for the big game?

I quit the team.

- Are you serious?
- Yeah.

Why?

[Sighs]

Just tired of everyone kissing my a*s
'cause I'm captain of the football team.

You know... the coach, the students,
even the teachers.

Last year after we won
the 2A Conference--

That was thanks to you
and your completed passes.

You follow the games?

I wouldn't have guessed that.

I made a D on a biology test
right after,

and Mr. Furlong changed it to an A.

He said I deserved
for having such a strong arm.

That really bugged me, you know?

I worked hard for that D.
That was my D. I deserved that D.

I just wish people
would let me be, you know--

A "D" student.

Yeah.

[Bell rings]

Okay, class, listen up.

Today we are going to write
a living family history.

Everyone take out a piece of paper
and write down the name...

of every living member
of your family.

Begin with your immediate family...
those living with you...

then include the names
of your nearest living relatives.

[Student] What?

- [Stan] Is this gonna be on the test?
- This is the test.

What is that?

It's magic dust.

- You want some?
- No, I have a low tolerance, but thank you.

- You sure?
- I'm allergic to aspirin,

so that would probably k*ll me.

- We wouldn't want to do that.
- No.

I'm Marybeth Louise Hutchinson
of Atlanta.

Atlanta.
I know.

That's right.
You know everything.

I'm Zeke.

- I know.
- It's a pleasure.

The pleasure's all mine.

[Miscrophone feedback,
girl speaks over intercom]

There's a mandatory meeting in the office
at lunch today for all club presidents.

Remember, tonight we take on
the Brun County Changa.

- Please come at 5:30 and show your support.
- [Boy] Hey, that's mine.

Weird, isn't it?

- [Stokely] What do you think it is?
- [Stan] Locker search maybe?

Something weird is going on here.

Hey, Football.

Hey, Gabe.

- You're not pissed, are you?
- About what?

I'm the new team captain.

[Stan] What's going on here?

Nurse Harper, she's giving an ear exam
or some sh*t like that.

And that takes the police?

Stan, I need to talk to you.

I didn't know you wore glasses.

Contacts.
Come on, it's important.

Stokely, got a second?
I need your help.

So after the accident, I came here
to live with relatives, you know.

So I moved in with my cousins and...
here I am.

f*cking do something,
you p*ssy puke!

[Zeke] Yeah, my mom and dad
are dead too.

- Really?
- Yeah.

They're still breathing,
but for all intents and purposes,

they're very much dead.

You've f*cking gone weird.
f*ck you, you p*ssy.

- f*ck you!
- You and I have a lot in common then.

Yeah...

You notice anything off
today here at school?

[Marybeth] I'm from the south.

- Y'all are off.
- Dude, we need some scat.

Yeah, man, we can't deal.
There's some weird sh*t going down here.

Five bucks a pop. Hey, man,
how's the new you working out?

Working out just fine.

Hey, you got any more?

- Sure, man.
- Really?

Why don't you give us
all you got?

All right.
Dough.

- You got any more?
- Not on me, man.

- What about in your locker?
- How about in your car? Got any more there?

- Use in moderation, boys.
- Come on, Zeke. Hook us up.

[Boys whispering] Check out Miss Burke.
Wow, what happened to her?

Oh, man, I'm really not in the mood,
Miss Burke. I'm clean.

- [Girl] What's up with her?
- Not today.

It's too damn hot, and I got
zero-f*cking-tolerance.

Eat me, you as*h*le! I'm the one with
no tolerance, you pathetic little runt!

Ouch. Comeback.

What are you gonna do?
Are you gonna call my mother?

And how am I supposed to do
that, little Zekey boy?

Do you even know where she is?

Europe, Sri Lanka, Japan? I wonder what
remote location she went to this week...

to hide from her
great big b*stard mistake.

I've taken your sh*t
for too f*cking long,

you dickless drug-induced
excuse for a human being.

- Whoa. Woman, what are you on?
- "Woman"?! Did you just say, "woman"?!

I'm sick of you, little boy.

And if I see you peddling
your wonder dust again,

I'm gonna shove my foot
so far up your a*s...

you'll be sucking my toes
till graduation.

[Bystanders murmuring]

[Girl] Big trouble. Oh, wow.

She got some bad sh*t.

And then they chased us,
but we got away.

All this started when Mrs. Brummel
did a wet and wild...

- ...in the boys' locker room?
- [Casey] I think so.

Everybody's been acting really strange,
especially the faculty.

Tell me about it. It's like they've
all turned into f*cking pod people...

- ...or something.
- Into what people?

Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
A small town was taken over by aliens.

That was a joke.

Look, what if it really happened?

- What if that really happened?
- I think something's taking over our school.

The Body Snatchers is a story
somebody made up, dingus.

It's located in the fiction
section of the library.

So is Schindler's List. All fiction
is based on some truth, right?

What does Miss Burke teach us
in English 101? Write what you know.

How do we know this writer guy...

- Jack Finney.
- didn't encounter aliens in his high school...

which led him to write a book
about an alien invasion?

- Your conspiracy theory is flawed.
- How so?

Jack Finney's The Body Snatchers
is a blatant rip-off...

of The Puppet Masters
by Robert Heinlein.

So you can completely disregard
that entire work.

Whatever.
The point is they're here,

they've been here
and they're here again.

You know, Casey, I think you've been racked
into the flagpole one too many times.

Look, how do you know
there's not a conspiracy?

Maybe X-Files is right.

Where do all these movies
come from anyway?

How do we know Spielberg,
Lucas, Sonnenfeld,

Emmerich haven't been
visited by aliens?

You know, maybe they're
aliens themselves.

Maybe they're simply preparing us
for what's to come.

You know what, Casey,
it's fiction. Okay?

- It's science fiction.
- Exactly.

Everybody gets hung up on the science part,
which has nothing to do with it.

They're getting at us
through the fiction.

So, aliens have just been
setting us up over the years,

creating this happy little
make-believe existence...

with their E.T. and
their Men ln Black movies...

just so that nobody would believe it
if it really happened?

I think so...
yeah.

- You're not buying this, are you?
- No, I'm not.

[Tapping table]
But... it's kind of cool.

Okay, so what's missing?

Well, in The Body Snatchers,
they were pods, but where are they?

I mean, where are the pods?

There are no pods.

There's gotta be something else.

In Puppet Masters,
they were parasites.

- I filled Stan in.
- Come with us. Stokely's onto something.

Really?

sh*t.

[Door closes]

[Stokely] Furlong must have
sent it up to the university.

- Doubtful.
- Where else could it be?

- [Sighs]
- What? What is it?

Will someone please tell me
what the hell's going on here?

It all started yesterday when
I found this thing, this new species.

Which is now missing.

We think aliens are
taking over our school.

Yeah, right. Come on.

You saw what Brummel
did in the shower.

I saw her dead body
in the closet.

They've been calling students
into the office all day.

The students with
the most influence on down,

including the new team captain.

Looks like you picked
the right week to quit football.

You-You think aliens have
infested our school?

That would explain their weird
behavior, wouldn't it?

Give me a f*cking break.

So, what are we doing in here?

Shopping.

- I've got a very large grocery list.
- What are you talking about?

This is where I get my equipment.

You borrow it from science labs?

I like to think of it
as stealing, actually.

[Giggles]

Just doing my part to
the deconstruction of America.

So if anybody finds us in here,

just grab ahold of me and pretend
we're making out.

The punishment will be less severe.

♪ I don't need an education ♪

♪ I learned all I need from you ♪

♪ They've got me on some medication ♪

- [Stan] Aliens?
- [Casey] Do you have a better explanation, Stan?

[Stan] Great. Just listen to yourselves.
Our teachers are aliens?

Shh.

[Stan] That's not weird,
that's f*cking psychotic.

Come on, guys.
Alie-- this is nuts.

Then leave, Stan. Why are you
hanging around? Go win a Pulitzer.

Blow me, Delilah, 'cause I'm sick
of your sh*t.

Get the f*ck out of here and take
your freak d*ke with you.

f*ck you, tit bags.

- Will everybody calm down, please?
- [Stan] All right, Casey.

Let's go... alien for a second.
Why here?

Why Ohio?

If you were going
to take over the world,

would you blow up the White House
Independence Day style...

or sneak in through the backdoor?

[Zeke screams]

- [Gasping, coughing]
- [Marybeth giggling]

[Zeke continues gasping]

Casey.

Man, the only person
in this school who is an alien...

is you, man.

- f*ck you, Zeke.
- Oh.

What's going on here?

Shouldn't you people be in class?

Well, it's like this, Mr. Furlong,

Casey here thinks you're an alien.

[Laughs]

- Really?
- The whole faculty, actually.

Is that true?

Casey?

The, uh, thing I found yesterday...
where is it?

I sent it to the university.

Do they know what it is?

Look, sorry to impose
and disrupt, Mr. Furlong, but--

If you'd kindly take your seats,
this will be over quite quickly.

Now sit down!

- Put him the f*ck down, Furlong.
- This is for the best, Zeke.

[Groans]

g*dd*mn it!

[Marybeth] Come on.

No!

[Hissing]

- [Groaning]
- [Marybeth screams]

[Creatures screeching,
girls screaming]

[Groaning]

[Furlong screaming]

- [Spits out cap]
- Zeke.

[Bell rings]

This is usually the point where somebody
says, "Let's get the f*ck outta here."

Let's get the f*ck outta here.

Aliens are taking over
the f*cking school.

We gotta have proof.

All right, everybody,
here's the deal.

We're heading straight
for the parking lot.

Pull it together,
and try to stay calm.

[Voice whispers] Stokely.

[Girl laughing]

[Voice whispers] What's Stan
hanging out with those guys for?

[Boy] Delilah.

[Indistinct whispering]

[Zeke] My car.

- Where are we going?
- [Delilah] Anywhere but here.

Wait. Stan!

- [Boy] There he is. Let's go.
- Where you going, buddy?

- We're going to, uh--
- Come on, Stan. Jesus Christ.

- Get in the f*cking car.
- Sure you don't want to play with us?

Nah, Gabe... but thanks.

[Screeching]

What the f*ck is going on?

Let's see if anybody's talking.

[Static]

[Pushing radio buttons]

- [Police radio, indistinct]
- Who the f*ck are these guys?

All right, pull over here, fellas.

- f*ck this sh*t. [Revs engine]
- [Officer] Hey!

[Car approaching quickly]

[Tires screeching]

[Car doors closing]

- [Casey] Where's your mom and dad?
- [Zeke] Europe, I think.

Oh, sh*t.

- Oh, my God.
- [Stan] This is some serious sh*t.

[Chuckles] This is your big secret?
Caffeine pills?

You didn't see that.

[Delilah] What are we gonna do with
the police not being an option?

[Stan] I can call my dad.
He'd know what to do.

If he's even your dad anymore.

It's called a g*n, man.

What is it?

We're gonna find out.

Hey, come here, Oscar.

Come here, buddy.

Jeez.

Now what?

I'm sorry, buddy.

[Sudden crack]

[Sighs]
See? It's a parasite.

It attaches itself to a host,
and then it controls it.

- It's incomplete.
- What do you mean?

It can survive on its own, but it's
really part of a greater organism.

Look, it has the ability to replicate,
but it needs a host.

Something moist.

See what it did to Oscar's insides.
It dried them out.

[Stan] Hey, isn't a human body
composed mainly of water?

They're using us.

- Drying us out.
- Like Mrs. Brummel, right?

[Casey] I overheard the coach.

Her body was too old.
She didn't take.

See, this partially explains
what happened to Furlong.

That drug's a diuretic.
Dries it out. Kills it.

They're using us as hosts. They're just
turning us into mindless sl*ves...

- they can control.
- How do you know that?

She doesn't.
She's a Trekkie sci-fi freak.

Who's been right so far.

How do we stop it?

Yeah, Stokely, this is your area.

In theory, they're all connected.

- If we k*ll the master, we get them all.
- "In theory."

What happens to everybody else?

The ones who've been taken over?
Do they just die?

No, they don't.
They would become human again.

But that is in theory, so--

So if we found the leader
and k*lled it,

- we'd beat it.
- What are we even talking about?

- I say we get the f*ck out of town.
- [Casey] And go where?

Don't you see? We got to stop it
or it's gonna spread.

It took the high school
in a day and a half.

Give it a week,
we'll never outrun it.

- We have to fight.
- [Stan] Fight what?

We don't even know
who's alien and who's not.

What if one of us was an alien
right now? How would we know?

He's right. How do I know
you're really Casey?

How do I know you're really you?

In Body Snatchers,
humans became emotionless.

- They completely lost their identities.
- [Stan] The coach had emotion.

I mean, he's usually a real hard-a*s,
but he was different somehow.

His behavior was slightly odd.

Like a star quarterback who mysteriously
quits the football team?

[Scoffs]
What are you doing, Delilah?

I'm just pointing out
your "slightly odd" behavior, Stan.

You've been acting really weird
the last couple of days.

I'm not an alien,
I'm discontent.

- There's another big word.
- You want to talk slightly odd?

What about you? You haven't been
without your contacts...

or hair spray since... birth.

- I'm incognito.
- We just have to trust each other.

And I'm supposed to trust you?

Tell me something, Miss l*sbian,
when did you start liking boys?

- What the f*ck you talking about?
- I see the way you look at Stan.

So when did you stop muff-diving?

She's not a l*sbian, Delilah.
It's a hoax.

- Really?
- [Marybeth] Yeah.

And what about you...
Miss Atlanta?

It's just really convenient
that you showed up the second

all these things started happening.

- What are you doing in Ohio anyway?
- It's not my fault.

Hey, shut up.

[Casey] She's got a point, Zeke.

[Stan] Yeah, Zeke, Professor.

I mean, you seem to know
an awful lot about this stuff.

No offence, but you're not exactly known
for your academic achievements.

Neither are you, man.

- Casey, when did you become Sigourney Weaver?
- Wha--

All right,
this is getting us nowhere.

I got a solution.

We know this outs them, right?
Take a hit.

No way, man.
I don't do drugs.

Aw, come on, man. If you're not an
alien, you got nothing to worry about.

Zeke's right.

This is the only way
to know for sure.

[Zeke] Yeah, come on, Stan.
What are you afraid of, man?

Look, we all do it.

- Casey.
- Why me first?

It's your birthright, man.
Just f*cking take it.

- [Inhales deeply]
- Easy, boy.

[Clears throat]

What about you, Zeke? How do we know
you're not one of those f*cking things?

I don't get high
on my own stash, man.

f*ck that, man!
You're taking it.

[Casey giggling]
You're taking it.

[Continues giggling]

- [Giggling continues]
- Now what the hell's wrong with him?

- [Laughing hysterically]
- [Zeke] Nothing's wrong with him, you as*h*le.

He's tweaking.
Let him f*cking tweak!

[Casey laughing]
Tweak. Tweak.

Now you.

[Casey laughing]

[Zeke inhales]

- Your turn.
- [Drops cap]

[Inhales]

Stokely.

I'm not putting that hack drug
up my nose.

- It's so '80s.
- Aliens are taking over the Earth. Weigh it.

[Casey giggling]

- What's in it?
- Mostly caffeine. Some other household sh*t.

[Tosses cap, inhales]

[Casey and Stan laughing]

- [Knocks over can]
- Oh, sh*t.

[Laughing continues]

Now you, Delilah.

No.

- Her first.
- [Laughing continues]

- I'm allergic.
- Yeah, and I'm Portuguese. Who cares?

[Stifles laugh, laughing]

[Laughing continues]
Is she always this much fun, man?

[Laughing]
Sometimes she can be a real b*tch.

[Stan and Casey laughing]

[Stan laughing]
You know what I'm saying? You know?

You both take it. [Sniffling]

Zeke, I can't.
You know I can't.

You have to take it.

Showdown. [Laughing]

[Continues laughing]

[Laughing continues]

[Laughing]

[Inhales deeply]

[Screeches, drops vial]

Del?

Oh, sh*t!

[Yells]

sh**t her. sh**t her
in the head, Casey.

- Stan, I don't know what's happening.
- [Zeke] sh**t her, Casey.

- Don't sh**t her, Casey.
- sh**t her, Casey. She's f*cking one of them, man!

There's nowhere to go.

Nowhere to hide.
We're everywhere.

- I'll f*cking sh**t her.
- [Fires g*n]

Ah, sh*t!

Jesus!

Get her!

- [Starts engine]
- She's getting away!

- Hurry!
- Aw, sh*t!

I should have known that
crazy b*tch was one of them.

We can get her back, Zeke.

We can get them all back.

[Panting] She destroyed
most of my supply.

Look, if we k*ll the queen,
we can get them all back.

f*ck!

[Giggling]

- How much do we have left?
- Not much.

But we only need enough
to get the queen.

- We get her, we get them all, right?
- [Stokely] I think so.

- Where are we gonna find her?
- Friday night? Only one place she can be.

[Revving engine]

[Crowd cheering]

- Go Hornets!
- ♪ We don't need no thought control ♪

[Announcer] He crosses the field!
Eludes the tacklers!

Tackled by four Hornets
with authority.

♪ We don't need no education ♪

[Grunts]

[Announcer] Oh, somebody stung
by the Hornets!

- [Crowd cheering]
- ♪ We don't need no thought control ♪

Come on, ladies!
Let's play four quarters!

- [Crowd cheering]
- Jesus.

♪ No dark sarcasm in the classroom ♪

[Crowd Cheering]

Get in there and take
his f*cking head off.

♪ Teacher leave them kids alone ♪

k*ll! k*ll!

[Crowd cheering]

♪ Hey, teacher!
Leave them kids alone ♪

[Crowd chanting] k*ll!

♪ All in all, you're just
another brick in the wall ♪

- You think it's Principal Drake?
- Who else?

She's in charge.
It would make perfect sense.

[Crowd cheering]

[Stokely] They're getting everybody.
I mean, the whole town is here.

By morning, there won't be
a human left.

Come on.

[Distant fireworks exploding]

Where are you guys?

[Stokely] We found Drake.
She's at the game.

What are you kids doing in here?

The gym is closed.
All of you come with me.

We can't do that, Miss Drake.

Why is that?
[Groans]

- [Groaning]
- Get her.

- [Stan] Quick, Zeke, get the doors!
- [Thunder rumbles]

Get me out!
You're all expelled!

- Stop the act. No one's buying it.
- We know who you are.

[Huffs]
You're in a lot of trouble.

What are you doing?

- You ready?
- Yep.

Sniff this.

- No.
- Sniff it or he shoots you.

I will not.

Now what?

[Thunder rumbling]

We do it the hard way.

With Mr. Furlong, we plunged it
into his eye,

and the reaction was instantaneous.

You stick her, and then I'll sh**t her
before it erupts all over the place.

Casey, are you on drugs?

- What's wrong?
- Are we sure?

Please don't, Casey!

Don't wuss out, Casey!
Just do it!

[Thunder rumbling]

What if we were wrong?

Stab it and find out.

[Casey] I think
we made a mistake, guys.

- She's dead.
- [Screams]

[Screaming]

- [Zeke] Easy!
- [Continues screaming]

[Continues screaming]

Is that it?

Let's see if it worked.

[Stokely] It better have worked,

or there are gonna be a lot
of infected people going home.

[Casey] We're right at ground zero.

You guys stay here.
I'll go check it out.

I'm gonna need some scat.

Use it wisely, man.

- What if it wasn't Drake?
- [Sighs]

Then we're f*cked.

I just don't want to never
have done that.

[Door closes]

What are you looking at?

Coach.

Jesus, I wish I'd never come here.
I don't like this place.

Any sign of him?

[Stokely] I can't tell.
I can barely see anything.

Quick, Stokely, open the door.

No, Stokely! We don't know
if it's still him.

No, it's me.
Listen, it wasn't Drake.

It's the coach, and he's right after me.
Open the door.

Don't do it, Stoke. Prove it, Stan.
Where's the drug?

I lost it. The coach was too fast for me.
Please, Stokely, don't leave me out here.

Last one, man.

[Stan] Please, I'm begging you!
Don't leave me out here!

- Come on, Stokely. Open the door.
- There, try it.

Okay, I'll do it. I'll--
Just let me do it inside.

Do it right now, man.

- [Casey] Take the test, man.
- Stan, take the drug, man. Prove it to us.

Okay.

f*ck!

f*ck!

Open the door.

It is so much better.

There's no fear...
or pain.

It's beautiful.

And you will be beautiful.

You'll be beautiful.

No problems or worries.

We want you.

I want you.

I want you.

Now open the f*cking door!

- [Stan pounding] Open the door!
- Come away.

- Go a-f*cking-way, Stan!
- [Continues pounding]

It's too late, Stokely.
We've already won.

No pain, Stan?

Well, come in here,
and I'll show you some f*cking pain!

[Thunder rumbling]

I say we go for the coach.

He turned Stan.
He's the one.

Would you rather wait
for them to come to us?

Either way,
we're completely unarmed.

Maybe not. I might
have some more scat.

Where?

- In my trunk.
- [Sighs] In your trunk.

In your car, amongst the aliens.
Oh, that's convenient.

You got a better idea?

Stan?

You out there, buddy?

- [Footsteps departing]
- Does it really take two of us to get to your car?

Nope. One of us is a decoy.

[Team shouting] Get him!

[Player #1] Where did he go?

- [Player #2] Check over there.
- [Coach] Come on! Find him!

[Team shouting in distance]

- Hello, Casey.
- [Gasps]

Where are you gonna go,
huh?

Class wuss.
Eternal little loser...

who comes to school every day
knowing that this is it.

You've been
labelled pathetic...

since first grade, and you're afraid it's
gonna bleed over for the rest of your life.

But we can stop it, Casey.

We can help you belong.
Isn't that what you really want?

Please don't do this, Delilah.

I haven't been this happy
since probably--

since before my dad died.

You know you want me, Casey.

Come on.
Let's do it together.

[Shouting]

- [Grunting]
- [Players shouting]

[Panting, fumbling with keys]

- Hello, Miss Burke.
- [Closes trunk]

Hello, sweetie pie.

- What are you looking for?
- Nothing important.

So, I take it you changed your mind
about the chocolate laxatives?

Actually, I had my heart set on something
cherry-flavored. You know what I mean?

[Laughs]
Sorry, I'm all out of those.

I might have something else
for you though.

- Yeah?
- Oh, yeah.

- Something tasty?
- [Softly] Let me hook you up.

[Tires squealing]

Hello, Zekey boy.

- [Revs engine]
- [Screams]

You're too tense, honey.
Relax.

[Groaning]

f*ck this. I'm outta here.

[Stokely] I always thought the only alien
in this high school was me.

[Marybeth chuckles]
Not the case.

[Marybeth] Who do you think it is,
the master alien, the queen bee?

[Stokely] It could be anyone.

[Marybeth] What happens at the end
of these stories, Stokely?

How does Invasion of the
Body Snatchers turn out?

[Stokely] They get us.
They win. We lose.

[Marybeth] Do we?
Maybe we really win.

Stan didn't look unhappy.

That's 'cause it wasn't Stan.

They took away who he was.

Maybe they just bettered
who he was,

cleared away his confusion.

I know you pride yourself
on being the outsider, Stokely,

but aren't you tired of being
something you're not?

I know I am.

No f*cking way!

Oh, sh*t!

Run, Stokes! [Gasps]

Stokes!

Stokely!

[Casey muffled]
Stokes! Stokes!

Stokely!

[Gasps]
No!

Stokely!

[Screeching]

Come on, Stokes.
Run!

Come on!

[Alien screeching]

[Footsteps approaching]

- Hello?
- Zeke, I'm over here.

Watch out.
It's her.

- Zeke, don't believe her. It's her.
- She attacked me. Please, Zeke.

- What's going on here, Marybeth?
- Please, it is her.

[Marybeth] She's lying.
She's trying to fake you out.

We don't know what she is...
g*y, straight, alien.

Answer me something, Marybeth...

why are you naked?

Does it bother you, Zeke?
My body?

- I'm getting kind of used to it myself.
- But I saw you take the test.

Zeke, how the hell can you
be sure what you saw?

It was sweet of you
to bond with me.

To be nice to me was sweet.

Will it work again, baby?

Do you like what you see?

Zeke.

[Growls]

- Take this.
- Now, Marybeth.

- You sniff it.
- You're out of your f*cking mind.

I'm not taking any chances. I leave for
five minutes, and everyone's an alien.

Now if I have to Men In Black your a*s,
you're gonna f*cking sniff it.

[Casey inhaling]
Happy now?

[Alien growling]

[Growling continues]

[Growling]

Jesus. I'm f*cking seeing two
of everything.

[Softly] Zeke. Zeke!

[Alien roaring]

Come on, buddy.
Get up.

[Alien roaring]

- [Gasps]
- He's over here.

[Alien roaring]

[Roaring continues]

Casey, come out, come out,
wherever you are.

You know, in my world, Casey,

there were limitless oceans
as far as the eye could see.

A beautiful home
until it started to dry up.

So I escaped,

came here and met you.

All of you.

All of you were different
from the others.

[Softly] Thanks, pal.

You were lost and lonely,
just like me.

And I thought that maybe
I could give you a taste of my world,

a world without anger,
without fear, without attitude.

Where the underachiever goes home
at night to parents who care.

The jock can be smart,
the ugly duckling beautiful,

and the class wuss doesn't
have to live in terror.

And the new girl-- Well, she can just fit
right in with people who are just like her.

You see, Casey, even Marybeth's
feelings can be hurt...

by a bunch of pathetic,
lost, little outcasts...

who truly believe that their
disaffected lonely life...

is the only way they can survive.

I can make you a part of something
so special, Casey, so perfect,

so fearless.

Don't you want that, Casey?

[Casey] I'd rather be afraid.

Fine. All right.
Have it your way.

'Cause this is where your
land of fiction gets it right.

We win. End of story.

[Alien roaring]

[Roaring]

- [Roaring]
- [Grunts]

[Alien roaring]

[Alien roaring]

[Screeching]

[Continues screeching]

Guaranteed to jack you up.
[Grunts]

[Screaming]

- [Roaring]
- [Screaming]

- [Screaming]
- [Casey screaming]

[Casey gasping]

[Groaning]

[Moaning]

[Panting]

You wouldn't have
liked it here anyway.

[Panting]

Stokes. Stokes.

Are you... you?

I think so.

[Sighs]
I hope so.

- [Yells]
- f*ck!

- sh*t!
- Is it over?

Yeah.

[Laughing]

All right, you little f*ck-pukes,
quit screwing around!

[Female reporter] As you can see, life has
returned to normal at Herrington High...

after the mysterious disappearance of
several faculty members one month ago.

Both the local authorities and
the F.B.I. have largely discounted...

several students' claim that
an extraterrestrial was involved.

A spokesperson for the F.B.I.
has indicated

that no substantiating evidence
has been found.

That goes for you too, Zeke!

Just 'cause you're the new guy doesn't
mean we're gonna cut you any slack!

Put that butt out
and get in there!

[Male reporter] Now bring
that camera over here.

When do you think they're
gonna find a new story?

Haven't they milked our little
high school invasion to death?

[Female reporter] Although there
has been no evidence of foul play,

the criminal investigation
is ongoing.

No regrets?

None whatsoever.

♪ She comes up and over time
like a thousand times before ♪

♪ I'm dropping out and faded
But I keep on wanting more ♪

So, how does it feel to be a hero?

It's all right, I guess.

I don't know, it's...

♪ It's over now ♪

- ...different.
- [Male reporter] That's him over there. Hey, Casey.

[Delilah] Your fan club's here again.

Network or local?

Both.

You know, you can be
pretty cool sometimes.

[Casey] Things sure have changed,
haven't they?

[Students laughing, chattering]

♪ One way out ♪

♪ Is all you're ever gonna get from ♪

♪ Those who'll hand it out ♪

♪ Don't ever let it upset you ♪

♪ 'Cause they'll put words into your mouths ♪

♪ They're making you feel so ashamed ♪

♪ They're making you take all the blame ♪

♪ They're making you cold in the night ♪

♪ They're making you question
your heart and your soul ♪

♪ And I think that it's not quite right ♪

♪ Hey, stay young and invincible ♪

♪ 'Cause we know just what we are and ♪

♪ Come what may we're unstoppable ♪

♪ 'Cause we know just what we are ♪

♪ Yeah, we know just what we are ♪

♪ Yeah, we know just what we are ♪

♪ They'll put words into my mouth ♪

♪ They're making me feel so ashamed ♪

♪ They're making me take all the blame ♪

♪ They're making me cold in the night ♪

♪ They're making me question
my heart and soul ♪

♪ And I think that it's not quite right ♪

♪ Hey, stay young and invincible ♪

♪ 'Cause we know just what we are and ♪

♪ Come what may we're unstoppable ♪

♪ 'Cause we know just what we are ♪

♪ Yeah, we know just what we are ♪

♪ We know just what we are ♪

♪ I watch the ripples change their size ♪

♪ But never leave the stream ♪

♪ Of warm impermanence and ♪

♪ So the days float through my eyes ♪

♪ But the days still seem the same ♪

♪ And these children that you spit on ♪

♪ As they try to change their worlds ♪

♪ Are immune to your consultation ♪

♪ They're quite aware of what
they're going through ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Turn and face the strange ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Don't tell them to grow up
and out of it ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Turn and face the strange ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Where's your shame
You've left us up to our necks in it ♪

♪ Time may change me ♪

♪ But you can't trace time ♪

♪ Strange fascination ♪

♪ Fascinating me ♪

♪ Changes are taking ♪

♪ The pace I'm going through ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Turn and face the strange ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Look out all you rock and rollers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Turn and face the strange ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Changes ♪

♪ Pretty soon you're gonna
get a little older ♪

♪ Time may change me ♪

♪ But I can't trace time ♪

♪ I said that time may change me ♪

♪ But I can't trace time ♪

[Audience applauding]