01x02 - The Robber Chief

[bunniefuu]

I don't know how it happened,
but you already hold my robber's heart

in your little hands.

Whoo!

There are things out there you
must watch out for. Wile-wings, of course.

- But there are gray dwarves, too.
- Ah!

Lovis, are there others like me?

Not in the Mattis Woods.

My name is Mattis,
and it's my unfortunate duty

to inform you that we are robbers.

Mattis, where
does all this come from?

A cart.

You just stay there, boys,
and we'll take care of this.

Give my love to Mattis.

Damn it all to hell!

Borka swine!

Yet another empty cart.
People are starving.

I'm not starving.

Stop those damned
Mattis and Borka robbers immediately

or I'll find someone who will.

The soldiers
drove Borka from his cave.

- And who are you?
- Birk Borkason. And we live here now.

That Borka?

So the North Fortress
is full of scoundrels now?

If your side is called
the North Fortress, I guess it is.

This is Borka Keep now.

Mattis will throw you all out.

That's what you think.

If... if you come here, I'll strike you,
just so you know.

Go on, if you can.

You can handle yourself.

Ah!

Help me.

Hold on!

Wrap this around you.
Don't do anything until I say so.

Tell me when
you've wrapped it around you.

Now.

Are you done jumping now?

I have to get back, I guess.

Undo the strap first.

I don't want to be tied to you
for longer than necessary.

After this, I might be tied to you anyway.

Without the strap.

BASED ON ASTRID LINDGREN'S BOOK

RONJA THE ROBBER'S DAUGHTER

Lies and mischief can be amusing.

But made-up tales
about Borka swine moving in,

that's over the line.

It's not made up.

Don't lie to me, girl.

I'm not lying.

Borka has no child!

He can't have any.

That's what they've always said.

Borka has no child!

He may have had a small boy

that Undis squeezed out
the night of the thunderstorm.

You know, uh, when we got Ronja,

uh, those were happy days.

Why has no one told me?

What else don't I know?

And now, that snake spawn,

with his heathen of a father,

in the North Fortress!

They're calling it the Borka Keep now.

That's enough!

Do you think Borka will disappear
because you so bravely wreck our home?

If you've got lice in your fur,
do something about it.

Borka swine, right?

You don't have to be sad.

We can throw them out.

That might be difficult.

It's a part of the Mattis Fortress,
and the Mattis Fortress is impenetrable.

You won't solve anything
on an empty stomach.

Did they send you, down all those steps?

They figured I was the only one
you wouldn't throw the bowl at.

How did they get in?

One man might be able
to sneak past Wolf Narrows,

but an entire band of robbers?

We have no guards on the north side.

They're pests, but they're not flies.

There's only sheer rock wall.

Well, not only rock wall. Right?

And it wouldn't be the first time
he took that other path.

It's been closed since then.

- What is closed?
- Nothing.

- I'm just saying that--
- Do you want me to throw the bowl?

No, I'm just rambling.

He's just rambling.

Take him back upstairs.

I want to brood and curse in peace.

Post guards by Hell's Mouth.

Tell them to k*ll any
who dares to come up.

The snake spawn too.

And send word to Borka
that I want to see him.

Now!

Borka swine.

I was happy when I saw him.

The boy?

His name is Birk. But yes, the boy.

But now everything is wrong.

Mattis is angry.

And I'm angry too, because I was happy.

Did it have to be a little Borka swine?

He might be
in the North Fortress thinking the same.

"I was so happy when I saw her."

"Why did it have to be
a little Mattis sow?"

I punched him on the nose.

If he thinks that about me,
I'll do it again.

If I were Birk Borkason,
I'd keep my distance.

He's got an ugly name too.

Birk.

It sounds like
an old door on rusty hinges.

"Birk!"

No.

Whoa. Whoa.

Marketable wares.

From the Borka Cave.

Start loading it up.

Thank you, Halvert.

Your trust in me will benefit both of us.

- Now or never.
- Yes.

Come on, now.

For you, Mattis.

Give it! Give it here!

That's enough.

Come on! Let's have it!

It'll be fine.

You know what to do.

All right then!
Let's take this damn bull by the horns,

and throw him all the way down,
down into Hell's Mouth!

- Aren't you coming, Skully-Per?
- No, I've had enough of stairs for today.

Come.

So, Mattis...

It's been a while.

Your face looks more like a fox's ass
with each passing day.

But taking my fortress,

that's not the way to a long life.

You've also taken things
without permission, Mattis.

Isn't that what we do?

I'll give you an honest chance, Borka,
which is more than you deserve.

Leave my fortress
the same way you came in,

and we'll leave it at that.

You've never been a great thinker, Mattis.

But even you must see what'll happen
if one-eye over there doesn't stop.

I like it here in the Borka Keep.

So I guess you and I will
have to learn to live a little closer...

neighbor.

You really are a fox's ass!

There's even sh*t
coming out of the hole in the middle.

That damned bull...

I thought it would make more noise
when you threw him in Hell's Mouth.

Quiet, old man.

Mattis, why did Borka say you take things?

Not that name. Not now.

Ronja.

One eye to the sky.

Hm!

Riders approaching!

Where does Valdir live?

What do you want?

Why do you ask?

I'm the lawman here.

I don't let just anyone see Valdir.

Especially not armed people.

We are not just anyone.

I'm Cappa.

Smavis, my sister.

Valdir sent for us.

We're here to solve the problem
you failed to address.

And you think, uh, you two can do it?

- Yeah.
- That won't be easy for you.

Everyone likes me here.

I can imagine. You seem lovable.

There you are.
You were meant to arrive early tomorrow.

Welcome.

I see you've met Halvert already.

Delightful.

Take care of the horses.

I said, take care of the horses!

We've had a hard winter.

One can't do anything about nature,
but if you catch these robbers...

"When", not "if". When we catch them.

We're farmers and merchants, not hunters.

We keep away from the forests.

But we need the merchants and their carts,

and... and we need them here untouched.

It'll be a pleasure to solve your problem.

Pleased to hear it.

Smavis!

Shall we play, Cappa?

Watch where you're going.

You're not in
that much of a hurry, are you?

You don't know how much of a hurry I’m in.

What do you want,
robber's daughter?

I want you to stay away from my fox cubs.

And I want you to leave my forest.

The fox cubs are their own.

And they live
in the foxes' forest, not yours.

And it happens to be the wolves',

and the bears'
and the wild horses' forest too.

I know what lives out here,
so just keep your mouth shut.

It's your forest too.

But if you think it's yours alone,
then you're dumber than I thought.

I'll gladly share it with... foxes,

and wolves,

and even wile-wings...

as long as I can be rid of you.

Robber's daughter!

Robber's daughter!

Robber's daughter! Where are you?

We'll go home.

And stay there forever.

Where are you, Ronja?

Robber's daughter!

Robber's daughter!

Stop. Stop it, robber's daughter.

Huh?

It's really you.

Who else would I be?

I saw Lovis and Mattis, I think.

The underearthers.

They live in the mist.

They take the shape of the person
you want to see most of all.

Then you're clearly not an underearther.

Because I really don't want to see you.

- Welcome home.
- Thanks.

- Where have you been?
- In the forest.

That was a long time for a few berries.

The mist came.

I had to wait out the underearthers.

Birk.

And I saw fox cubs.

Did you manage to trap them?

- No.
- No?

Then we don't get any meat or fur.

Winter is close
and our food stores are empty.

I know.

But you're still out there playing,
watching fox cubs.

Do you think happy memories
will stave off hunger?

I'm sorry.

Go help your mother.

Then you'll be of some use.

Borka.

- Did you get hold of one?
- Mm-hmm

A lively one.

Make sure he gets it.

Mm.

Well, if you're done,
I can show you the room.

It's our best one.

- How long are you staying?
- Not long, I hope.

Valdir has called for a new bailiff.
A woman. Cappa something.

Never heard of her.

I asked some villagers.
Apparently, she's tough on robber bands.

I'd like to see her try
to att*ck Mattis Fortress.

But the rumor is that she's caught
and brought in over a score.

Here's what we'll do...

No one rides out alone
or unarmed from now on.

Just for a while.

She'll try, fail, and give up.

Just like all the others.

What are you doing here?

Waiting for you.

What's that?

It was here when I arrived.

What do you want?

Other than my job.

Valdir told me there were
two robber bands in the forests.

The Mattis robbers and the Borka robbers.

We know where the Mattis robbers are.

- The Mattis Fortress.
- Impenetrable.

And we've tried ambushing them,
but they're careful.

Capable fighters.

It was the Borka robbers
you went after the other night.

Right?

When they all escaped.

So those whose locations you know,
you can't capture,

and those you can capture,
you don't know their location.

I'm going to send
my soldiers out tomorrow,

try to track Borka.

- How many are they?
- About a dozen in each band.

I'll take charge of the soldiers.
It's an order from Valdir.

Or rather, I demanded it,
she agreed to it.

I wouldn't open that if I were you.

Why not?

Listen to it.

Mattis, is everything all right?

Mattis!

Borka, look.
Now we can see each other every day.

Borka has a son.

So Ronja said.

Did you know?

I may have heard about it.

But there was no reason
to weigh you down with that.

But now it is damn well weighing me down.

- He'll take over after Borka.
- That's how it usually goes.

Just like Ronja will take over after me.

She hasn't even come robbing with us yet.

I've always thought
we can take our time with that, but now...

Now...

She has to do better
than that snake spawn!

He may have gone out with Borka for years.

Yeah, you were seven when you started,

I remember that.

So, Ronja is already years behind.

That's what you think.

She's smarter than you.

She learns faster.

But still...

She...

She only knows
that I'm the biggest and mightiest,

not what I do.

What she will do.

And so far, she seems pretty happy.

She has to know what we are.

What it means
to have robber's blood in your veins.

If you say so.

Yeah. Then it's decided.

You're old, ugly, you smell bad,

but I don't know what I'd do without you.

No.

Shovel that porridge down.
We're heading out.

- You're coming with us.
- Where?

You'll see.

Mattis...

Eat up and get ready.

- We'll gather outside.
- Where are we going?

It seems your father has decided
that you're going robbing.

Why do you look so upset?

Isn't that what we do?

Yes.

It is what we do.

Hurry up now,
so you don't keep him waiting.

Get a move on
so we can get going.

Isn't it about time
that I have my own horse?

You will when
you're big enough to catch one yourself.

I am. I just haven't tried yet.

Try and we'll see how it goes.

We're riding out!

Bye, Little Cliff!

Bye, Ronja!

What are the weapons for?

Just in case.

Come on.

Yeah.

Wait.

What do we do now?

We wait.

For what?

For one of those.

The next arrow hits you.

Here's a brave one.

Drop the w*apon.

Thanks.

Let's go.

- What's going on?
- Come on.

Ladies and gents, my name is Mattis,

and it's my unfortunate duty
to inform you that we are robbers.

If you would be so kind
as to step out, please.

Form a line and give everything up!

Put your w*apon down!

Drop to the floor!

Get on the floor!

Chorm.

A fortunate day, I see.

Welcome back.

Ronja...

How was it, Ronja? Your first time...

- Where is the child?
- Somewhere around here.

What did she say?

Nothing.

Is there anything you want to say?

About going robbing with Ronja?

It doesn't matter either way now.

It was time.

When did we agree on that?

She'd be used to it
if she'd started young.

You can't make those decisions
about our daughter without me.

I ran it past Skully-Per.

And when did he become her mother?

If you were against it,
you could have said something.

When you stormed in,
with your mind made up?

Yes. For example.

And you would have
changed your mind? Just like that?

It is what it is.

What do I do now?

You talk to her.

What do I say?

I guess you better ask Skully-Per.

My father was chief of robbers,
like my grandfather and his father.

That is what we are,
what we've always been.

You took their things.

Not all of them.

Labbas b*at him bloody.

Labbas was att*cked.

Because you took their things!

So where did you think we got all we have?

That it grew on trees?

I don't know.

Did you think we just rode out,

and found food, seed, clothes
and all we need lying in the forest?

I don't know.

It was just there.

Like rain.

I don't think about
where rain comes from either.

Now you know.

I wish that I didn't.

It went a bit wrong with Labbas
and with the little girl today.

But I won't apologize for who I am.

People fear me, look up to me.

I am the mightiest robbers' chief
in all mountains and forests.

And you will be too, one day.

Be like you?

Never.

Not on my life.

I thought my old ears heard something.

Why are you down here?

Why did you never tell me
how we got our things?

I wasn't allowed.

You do and say things
against Mattis' wishes all the time.

But look at you, my dear.

I didn't want to be the one to make
tears run on that beautiful face,

and now I have.

I understand now.

What is it you understand, my sunshine?

It hurts.

As if the wile-wings
are gnawing on my heart.

Oh dear.