02x02 - Spy Fly

[bunniefuu]

[ Fly buzzing ]

What is that?

Bree, relax.
It's just a fly.

Well, why is it
bothering me

when the foul, ripe stench
of Adam is right there?

Lucky undies.
Nine days in a row,

and no lightning strikes...
That's science.

[ Fly buzzing ]

[ Laughing... remote chirps ]

You look ridiculous.

Well, yeah, so would you if you had
some flying thing attacking you.

[ Remote chirps, buzzing
stops ] Would I?

[ Buzzes ]

How'd you do that?

I talk to insects.

They call me
the fly whisperer.

You can talk to flies?

Ask him why
bees are such jerks.

Guys, Leo's
messing with you.

That's Mr. Davenport's
spy fly,

he designed it for
recon missions.

You see, the fly's head
is a tiny camera.

Leo's controlling
the entire thing

with a trackball
on this watch.

Is there anything
you don't ruin?

Nope.

Leo, I don't think Mr. Davenport
would approve of you

using his expensive
gadgets as toys.

Well, then, he shouldn't have gone
to rock 'n roll fantasy camp.

Hello! You're almost forty!

You can't rock,
and you're no one's fantasy.

Can I see it?
Back off, handsy.

It needs to charge
in its fly hive.

I used it all night.

Wait. You spent all night
playing with that stupid thing?

Well, half the night.

I spent the other half
editing the footage.

What footage?

Well, now that
you've asked...

I give you the best...

Of Bree.

[ Snoring ]

[ Both laughing ]

I can't believe you,
Leo!

Hey, it's not my fault
you sleep ugly.

The world's first
bionic superhumans...

They're stronger than us,

faster, smarter.

The next generation
of the human race is...

Living in my basement?!

♪♪

[ Fly buzzing, Leo laughing ]

Would you cut it out?!

I cannot believe you brought
Davenport's fly to school.

Now I have two little pests
following me around.

How could I not?
He's my... wing man.

Hey, guys.

Chase, have you been
stealing

from
five-year-old girls again?

Ha ha. It's for health class.

Each of us has to baby-sit
a robo-baby for a night.

[ Doll crying ]
Are you hungry?

Yes, you are,

my snoogie-woogie-boogie!

Just when we thought
he couldn't get any creepier.

It cries when
it's tired or hungry.

I have to take care of him,

because if I don't,
I lose a point.

Which, of course,

I haven't.

And I won't,
because I have downloaded

every childcare book
available.

I even know how to rescue a baby
out of an alligator's mouth.

Happens more often
than you think.

So, where's your baby?

Lost it already?

Ha ha. No.

Do you really think
I'm that irresponsible?

It's in here.

I named him
"shut your cryhole."

That way, whenever I say his
name, he'll know to stop crying.

You keep your baby
in a bag?

Yeah! It's super-toasty,
books to read if he's bored,

and it's totally safe.

Oh! You found my gum!

And a penny!

Dude, you are totally
gonna fail this assignment.

No, I'm not,
because unlike you,

I know what a baby likes.

I think like a baby.

Yeah,
he's got you there.

Oh, yeah? Well, if you're
such an expert on babies,

why don't we just let the
scores speak for themselves?

You're on.

I've got a 98.
I'm only two points behind.

That's an 86.

[ Doll cries ]

Aw, it's okay,
"shut your cryhole."

[ Crying continues ]
Okay, seriously,

shut your cryhole,
"shut your cryhole."

Come on, Leo, or we're gonna
be late for our physics test.

Physics test?

Oh, no, no, no, no. I was so busy
with the fly I forgot to study.

Bree... sweet, loving,
caring Bree...

Wonderful, wise, beautif...
What do you want, Leo?

I have an idea. How about you
write down the right answers,

and I'll copy off your paper.
Sound like a plan?

No way, Leo.
I'm not helping you cheat.

Fine, I won't look
at your paper.

But I can't say the thing
for wingston Von dooley III.

[ Fly buzzing ]

[ Buzzing ]

Move your hand.

Aaah! That's it!

Give me that thing! Gimme!

Hey! Bounce house!

Knock it off.
There are people in here

trying to concentrate
on failing.

But he was...
No buts.

You know the rules. You leave
your seat during a test,

that's an a*t*matic "f."

Go!
Walk the hallway of shame.

Principal Perry, wait.

Can I get a little extra time?
That was really distracting.

♪ Rock-a-bye, baby,
on chase's shoulder ♪

♪ when your fall asleep, I'll
b*at Adam at this assignment ♪

♪ just like I b*at him
at everything else ♪

Adam:
Baby onboard!

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]
Hey!

I just lost a point
because of your stupidity!

Relax. It was
an accident.

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

Here's your baby.

Now I've lost two points!
And so should you.

Give me your baby!
No!

Too slow!

Too short!

Too chase.

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

[Baby talk] Oh, da liddle guy
musta been hungry.

Bree, I'm sorry. I didn't mean
for you to get in trouble.

I failed that test because of you.
Happy now?

No. To be honest, you're kind of
sucking the joy out of my a-plus.

I'm turning you in to Perry.
You can't!

If I get in trouble
one more time this semester,

she'll send me
to summer school.

Ohh! Fine!

All right, wingston...

Let's see what really goes on
in the teachers lounge.

[ Fly buzzing ]

Yechh! Gross!
Uh-oh.

Twenty years of people asking,
"gee, Terry,

why do you keep a flyswatter
in your purse?"

[Chuckles]
If they could see me now.

Ah.

Don't make me jump!

I've already split
six pantsuits this semester!

Ohh!

I've got you now!

No! You can't k*ll it!

If I can k*ll the spirit
of 300 high school students,

I can certainly k*ll
one little fly.

No! No! Stop it!

It's not a real fly.

It's electronic.

You brought another one
of your toys here?

You're just begging
to go to summer school.

No. No. It's not a toy,
it's a surveillance device.

I control it
with this watch.

Gimme.
No.

Uhh!

You use this thing
to spy on people?

Well, technically you could,
but I would never.

Very noble, dooley.
Thank you.

Also very dumb.

Ah. I'm gonna let you off
with a warning,

but this now belongs to me.

[ Laughing ]
You can't do that.

Yeah, that's what they tell me
every time I apply for

the miss north America pageant.

But my bikini tells
a different story.

Aahhh! Ooh!

Adam!

Where's my baby?

I can't find it, and it's
time for its 3:15 bath.

Don't worry. He's already
squeaky clean.

You put my baby
in the dishwasher?!

Yeah, I had to.
The toilet's too shallow.

That's it! You've just
declared baby w*r!

The diapers are off.

Hey. Where's my baby?

Oh, he wanted a snack.

Waaaa...

You put my baby
in a gelatin mold?

Joke's on you. I'll just
eat my way around him.

Oh ho. Oh ho.
Oh ho ho ho ho.

Chase. Your lazy baby
needed exercise.

I call this one "tether baby."

No! No! No! No!

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

[ Buzzer twice ]
Aw, look...

He's bad at sports...
Just like his daddy.

[ Sizzling ]

Oh, Adam.
Care for some breakfast?

I'm making waffles.

[ Gasps ]

[ Buzzer, baby cries ]

That oughta shut
his cryhole.

Aw, chase.
Your baby looks cold.

Aaaah!
[ Buzzer, baby cries ]

[ Buzzer, crying ]

[ Crying Peters out ]

Ooh. Yikes. Talk about a face
only a father could love.

Listen up, space wasters!

I've installed a new
surveillance system.

And fyi, this total invasion
of your privacy

comes courtesy of
the one and only

Leo dooley!

Perry airlines
cleared for takeoff!

[ Fly buzzing ] If you're
experiencing mild turbulence,

it's because we're passing
over the rockies!

Whoops. Those aren't mountains,
those are pimples!

[ Laughing ]

To your right,
we see Lindsay Hoffman

writing in her
oh-so-private diary!

What? Lindsay has a crush
on Timmy newcastle?

I think I'll go tell him.

Whoops! I think I just did!

Good luck!

[ Evil laughter ]

Perry left
the charging hive.

Now, Bree... Bree.
Think about what you're doing.

If you give that to Perry, she can
recharge the fly and my life will be over,

everyone will hate me.

That's the plan.

[ Swarm of flies buzzing ]

All: Ooh! Aah!

See what happens when you
don't let me cheat off you?

[ Flies buzzing ] How am I gonna
get all these flies back?

I don't know.
And also, I don't care.

Dooley! Your stupid toy's
messed up!

Uhh! Where did these
come from?

I haven't seen this many flies since I
thought my cat took a five-day nap.

[ Flies buzzing ]

I'll open the door.
No!

They're my step-dad's!
I can't lose them!

That door is opening whether
you're in the way or not.

I just need
a running start.

Can't we just talk this out
like civilized...

Charge!!!
Aaaaah!

[ Shrieking ]

Bree, I can't get all these
flies back without your help.

No problem. Just tell
Perry you cheated.

Really?
You're still on that?

Yep. Looks like
you're stuck, Leo.

"Stuck." that's it!

The best way to catch a fly

is with flypaper.

Leo, that'll never work.
They're not real flies.

Aaah! Sharp turns!
Sharp turns! Aaah!

[ Crash ] Ohh! Ooh!

I'm stuck.

[ Flies buzzing ]

Got one.

Look what you did
to my baby!

I had to wrestle his arm
from a golden retriever!

Well, thanks to you, my baby's
face looks like creme brulee!

We're both gonna fail,

and the only person
you have to blame is yourself

for your hideous-looking
cryhole!

[ Gasps ]
How dare you?!

Lucky for you his ears
are full of maple syrup.

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

Thirty-seven points...

You monster!

It's just a number.

My little guy
may have thirty-six,

but I'm still proud of him.

[Baby talk] Yes, I am, aren't I?

Yes, I am,
aren't I?

Answer me!!!

Wait a minute.

If I turn my baby in now,
I can still b*at you.

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

[ Both screaming ]

Get off me!!!

Perry: Hey, if anybody can hear me,
there's a crowbar in my purse!

[ Flies buzzing ]

Just confess and I can
help you fix all this!

You'll never be able
to steer them all.

Please, have
a little faith.

[ Remote control beeping ]

What is that?

"att*ck mode engaged.
Stun stingers activated."

This is getting better
by the minute.

[ Loud thudding ]

Oh, no.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

Oh. Oh. Hey.

Uh, don't worry. It says
the stings aren't lethal.

You'll just be stunned
for ten minutes.

In Spain they call this
a "siesta."

[ Laughs weakly ]

[ Crying ]

En garde!
Aha!

Wait!

There's a fly
on your head.

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

Are you gonna
get the fly or not?

[ Flies buzzing ]

Leo, what's happening?

Oh you know, destroying
priceless inventions,

unleashed a biohazard,
hated by all. Typical Tuesday.

Whoa! Look at
all those flies!

My baby!

Somebody do something!

Chase, throw your baby up
to get mine down!

No way!
But it's gonna get hurt!

Hurt? Adam,
it's a plastic doll.

[ Gasps ]

That is so insensitive.

To you he's just
a piece of plastic,

but to me, he's become
a little fake person friend

who almost never
judges me.

I was supposed to look
after him, and I failed.

I failed you,
my little cryhole!

Well, I don't care.

I'm going to turn my in, which means I'm
gonna win and you're gonna lose. Ha!

Yeah, I guess so.

Congratulations,
chase.

Thank you.
I'm gonna go now.

[ Flies buzzing ]

I'm gonna do it.

I'm leaving.

[ Whimpering, sniffling ]

Okay, fine, I'll help you!

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

Thanks, chase. That
really meant a lot to me.

Um-hmm.
Especially the part

where you completely
fell for it!

[ Laughing ]

[ Buzzer, doll cries ]

Help me!

Are you ready to tell Perry
you cheated?

Not really, no.

Oh, come on! Adam and
chase would cover for me.

Yeah, and they also turned their
babies into breakfast treats.

Look, I'm your sister,

and it's my job
to call you out

and hope that you're mature
enough to take responsibility.

But I'm not!

Fine. I'll tell Perry.

Smart move.

I'll just use my superspeed
to create a vacuum effect

and suck the flies
back into the hive.

What about using
your bionics in public?

I think we're good.

[ Flies buzzing ]

Wow. That was the fourth-weirdest
thing I've seen all day.

Speaking of which, number three
is still over there

waiting for your confession.

Great. I have to confess to
the wrong end of a pantsuit.

Principal Perry?

[Grunts] Who is that?

Don't try anything; I can
identify you by your stench.

It's me, Leo.
Ooh.

The only reason Bree was
talking during the test

was because I was using
the spy fly to cheat off of her.

She didn't deserve
to fail; I did.

Aw, that's nice.

I got an itch...

Unless you're plannin'
on scratchin' it,

get me off of here!

[ Grunting ]

One, two...

Ahh! Ohh... ooh.

Thanks, dooley.
I owe ya one.

Really?
Yeah...

One long, hot trip
to summer school!

[ Laughing ]

Forgot my eyebrows.

Mm mm mm.

Adam,
what are you doing?

I got so lonely I had to
adopt six new babies.

Meet "change your own diaper,"
"stop staring at me,"

"quit whining," "don't be
a baby," "I said shh!"

And Ted.

Why would you get
six babies?

[Laughs] Because seven
would just be crazy.

Adam, this is ridiculous.

You want to borrow one,
don't you?

I'll take Ted.